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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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The picture where he is in the pack and play he has shoes on, so I don't think he is ready for sleep, and he looks big in comparison to the pack and play.

 

Most crunchies that I know practice attachment parenting and this is quite the opposite, that photo looks very much like discipline to me.

 

Even if Jill & Derrick did this because they're naive & stupid, its still wrong. To me, swaddling a toddler's arms like that is the equivalent to an adult being put in a straight jacket.

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The picture of Derrick is hideous. He looks like the villain in a cheesy horror movie who is about to terrorize a small town. Just no.

Derrick, in case you see this, I have a suggestion. Solicit funds for a decent professional haircut. You'll have many thousands within minutes. I'll be the first to give. Oh, and quit swaddling your son and posting photos of the abuse. Babies are naturally inquisitive and want to explore. Let him. Come to your senses. Get rid of all blanket training crap. The world doesn't need more Gothard robots.

I had high hopes for you when you first met Jill. You were a graduate of a public university. You could have shown her a different way of life and helped her see that there's a big diverse world out there loaded with possibilities. Instead, you became a Duggar and ended up under Boob's thumb. Now you're just another huckster, publicly seeking money for who knows what. That's the Duggar way -- money for nothing.

When the TLC paychecks stop coming, you're going to need a real job. I suspect that an accounting position at Wal Mart is going to look mighty attractive. Too bad you blew it.

Edited by Hpmec
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Those pictures are not posted in chronological order (not sure why) so not sure how old Iz is in those picture though he looks too old for swaddling.  I don't think there is ill intent and I doubt he is damaged for life because of it.  Also I have friends who are great parents who often shared "bad time" pictures of their kids/babies crying.  As the kids got older the bad time pics were relished because they were often kids crying over not so bad times.  I do think the Dills love Izzy and would not purposely harm him.  He is happy in all his other pics so I don't think this is a big deal.  CPS would laugh at such a report.  They will get negative feedback that he is too old for swaddling and will stop.  He is usually a happy baby and will be fine even with his immature parents mistakes.    

 

I agree that they certainly didn't mean to harm Izzy. They're just misguided. Way misguided. And dim.

 

I have big reservations about people photographing children in moments of anger and misery, though. I wouldn't want to be photographed in moments like that. And I actually believe that "Do unto others" applies to kids as well, so I've never photographed a child being unhappy, and I never would. .... Kids kind of have to say they think the picture is funny, after the fact. To me, it's just really disrespectful.

Edited by Churchhoney
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Maybe.  Part of blanket training is to teach the kiddo that he must stay still and on the blanket at all times, no matter what.  Doesn't matter that a baby of 7-8 months is naturally going to be active and off the blanket in a heartbeat.  Maybe Izzy wouldn't sit completely still with his arms at his sides (what the Pearls advocate as the appropriate endpoint for blanket training) so they swaddled him up so he couldn't move if he wanted to.  What earthly, non-abusive reason could there be for swaddling an infant Izzy's age and leaving him on the floor crying hysterically?  The Pearls actually teach that parents should tempt the baby to leave the blanket by placing a favorite toy next to it and then hitting the baby with a switch if he/she reaches for it.  If Jill and Derek believe in blanket training, they probably think binding a baby up in a blanket so he cannot move is downright humane.  If they were in the US, I would be calling CPS personally this very moment.

Excuse my ignorance on the CPS thing, but would it be possible to report it in order for them to be investigated once they return to the US for another vacation?  These pics have completely horrified me - these idiots have zero business being responsible for a child.

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Maybe that's how they intend to keep the kid from molesting his siblings? Jill said they were going to take precautions! Gotta get him used to it now before the siblings are born. I'll bet they wish Jim Bob and Michelle had kept Josh wrapped up like that.

This is hilarious!

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The picture is ridiculous and has flamed the passions of everyone. But let's tone down the CPS/Blanket training rhetoic, shall we? And, just as an FYI, there is a short list of verboten words and the c-word is one of them. Thank you.

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When the TLC paychecks stop coming, you're going to need a real job. I suspect that an accounting position at Wal Mart is going to look mighty attractive. Too bad you blew it.

YES! Plus he has been out of the field of accounting for a long time. He had 9 months at Walmart. He had no internships or jobs during college that I have heard about. Who wants to hire an accountant who has so little work experience and who has been out of the field for so many years? He is going to be very rusty. 

 

Amen to him having a professional haircut instead of having Jill use a tupperware bowl to cut his hair. Jill reminds me of a friend from college. She had it in her mind that she could cut men's hair well. Every time she started dating someone new she'd offer to cut his hair. The idiots would go along with it so they could save $10 and buy beer instead of paying for a cut. She would butcher his hair and I would laugh to myself about how ridiculous he looked. No guy got a second cut from her.

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Not sure whether I'm more confused about why you would do this, why you would photograph it, or why you would post it online. Doesn't contradict my theory that they're all just extremely stupid, though.

 

I hope Izzy, Spurgeon and Meredyth all support each other in their quest to find a good therapist one day to help them deal with the crap that happened to them as little ones. They're all going to need it.

Like a million times. I have the same thoughts. If I were derrick' s mom I would be on the first plane. I would be tempted to knock idiots one and two heads together, but I would just grab that baby and go.

I know the grabbing the baby part is just a fantasy. But I hope MIss Kathy ripped her son a new one the size of the grand canyon. He is every bit as stupid she is. This just makes my blood boil.

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 Even if Jill & Derrick did this because they're naive & stupid, its still wrong. To me, swaddling a toddler's arms like that is the equivalent to an adult being put in a straight jacket.

Okay, I am as horrified by this as anyone, but to be fair, Izzy is not a toddler. He's eight months old. Granted, he is about the size mine were as two-year olds, but he's still a baby. If they actually restrained a two-year old like that... well. I'm having trouble imagining that. But it would be far worse than what's going on here.

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Picasso head and Jilly muffin have all the time in the world to comfort their only child, but instead they force his free will and soul out of him. I hope Izzy is the generation that finds his middle finger.

Picasso Head?? *snort*

I will be using this term from now on.

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So they took the twins to Papa Johns? Really going out on a cultural limb there, Dillards.

 

They probably scan the specials pretty carefully before they decide on which chain restaurant they'll bestow their (cheap) glory.

Edited by Churchhoney
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I just say the swaddling photos in an article posted on Yahoo (and read all the leghumper's comments *shudder*), They also posted a photo of Izzy sitting on a blanket with what looks like a bruised eye. Looks to me the sort of thing a baby who is trying to pull themselves up would get if they fell and got the corner of a table. In the background is an electrical outlet with no safety cover. My younger brother could not resist sticking hairpins in electrical outlets when he was just a little older than Izzy.

 

http://www.starpulse.com/news/index.php/2015/12/31/jill-dillard-blanket-training-disturbi

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Okay, I am as horrified by this as anyone, but to be fair, Izzy is not a toddler. He's eight months old. Granted, he is about the size mine were as two-year olds, but he's still a baby. If they actually restrained a two-year old like that... well. I'm having trouble imagining that. But it would be far worse than what's going on here.

You're right, but he is a crawler. And I don't know any parents who swaddle past the first few months. To me the picture looks as if he was intentionally wrapped so he would be immobile, not comforted. So to me whether 8 months old or 2 years old, it is totally wrong and abusive.

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How did Derick deteriorate so quickly into becoming a Duggar? Who would have thought that getting married to Jill would have turned him around. I'm still SMH trying to grasp it all.

 

How much longer can their sham/scam of a mission trip go on? I'm sure people have better ways to spend their money then to gift it away to them.

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How did Derick deteriorate so quickly into becoming a Duggar? Who would have thought that getting married to Jill would have turned him around. I'm still SMH trying to grasp it all.

 

How much longer can their sham/scam of a mission trip go on? I'm sure people have better ways to spend their money then to gift it away to them.

 

I think the Derick question is fairly straight-forward. He became a Duggar so quickly because he wasn't that strong a Dillard to begin with. He's timid, weak, lame, ineffectual. He's only outgoing and extroverted when wearing his Pistol Pete persona. He still needed adult intermediaries to get himself a date, so to speak - at the age of 25! We all had great hopes for him, but I for one never thought about how weird it was for a male his age to still need help from parents in this regard.

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How did Derick deteriorate so quickly into becoming a Duggar? Who would have thought that getting married to Jill would have turned him around. I'm still SMH trying to grasp it all.

 

 

I'll bet Jim Bob has a very good eye for potential spouses who are weak enough for this to happen easily. As well as for potential -- but ultimately nixed -- spouses who may not be weak enough. (maybe this is what happened with Jana's rumored suitor ...)  Control freaks, even seemingly dumb ones, often have great perceptions when it comes to opportunities to manipulate people, I think.

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Jizm Bob is a Hyena.  He can sense the weakness in the stray animals that come around.  Derick was just the first to stay long enough within range.  Ben was even easier pickings, due to his ego, age & looks.  Neither one had a chance.  

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I didn't know the C-word was banned. Oops. I'll stick to calling Jill an pious, incompetent woman-child, idiot parent, arrogant bitch. Promise.

Anyone want to bet donors paid for the Twin's tickets?

I find twat is universally accepted at most internet hangouts.✔
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Derick truely appears ill. I've never seen him look so horrible and awful before. I do hope he's fine.

 

Poor guy. It's like his face is the picture of Dorian Gray, only a completely visible one, registering for all the world to see the warping of his soul as he's gradually crumpled and subsumed into the Empire Duggar. What a couple of years he's had. Wonder how much of it he anticipated.

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Poor guy. It's like his face is the picture of Dorian Gray, only a completely visible one, registering for all the world to see the warping of his soul as he's gradually crumpled and subsumed into the Empire Duggar. What a couple of years he's had. Wonder how much of it he anticipated.

Great question, Churchhoney ! I would guess that Derick anticipated zero to very little of what's happened...

 

I feel that he knew nothing about Jill's molestation, at least until they were married, and even then he probably got the sanitized "asleep/over the clothes/not a big deal" version, but now he has to live with a family that was just peachy okey-dokey with having the "forgiven" wolf living among the sheep and his very own wife was one of the flock.

 

Even if Derick is an easily-manipulated, grifting jerk (which he is) that must have been one hell of a slap in the face. 

 

The look on his face says to me "Oh, Lord - what have I done with my life ?!?!" 

 

His Instagram and FB pictures are the living embodiment of "Grin and bear it..."

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I think the surgery took more of a toll on Derick than he expected. Precisely why he should have just stayed in his cozy cubicle at WalMart, but hey, trotting off to a foreign country with your baby and immature clinger of a wife sounded good at the time...

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Derick & Jill are getting clobbered on Pickles for the goddawful pics of bound and screaming Izzy.  It's well deserved.  They are idiots.  Poor Izzy!  He usually looks happy.  How could she (or he) stand there photographing him in such misery?  Why confine him like that?  

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Another point: the photo was posted today. The weather in Central America is currently highs in the mid 80's to 90's, lows in the 70's. It is very humid in Central America and almost no one has air conditioning. Can you imagine how hot that little guy was bundled up like that and screaming? He could easily develop heat exhaustion or even heat stroke in minutes in that environment wrapped up in a blanket.

I think Antigua is humid, but one can't really generalize about all of Central America. I lived in CR for a few years, and the Central Valley is gorgeous and dry in our winter months. The temps vary wildly because of the mountains and there are loads of microclimates.

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Poor guy. It's like his face is the picture of Dorian Gray, only a completely visible one, registering for all the world to see the warping of his soul as he's gradually crumpled and subsumed into the Empire Duggar. What a couple of years he's had. Wonder how much of it he anticipated.

 

Little, if any, I am sure...

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Dillard Ministry - we're here on other peoples dime to learn Spanish, what can you do for me? Not what we can do for you.

 

When I think about it, I guess it's not surprising that people who believe that life's biggest imperative is to convince everybody on the planet to think exactly what they think are inherently blinkered and selfish people to whom somebody else's well-being doesn't even occur as an abstract concept. They're just really really limited beings who can't or won't look beyond the ends of their own noses in any way whatsoever.

 

A curse on TLC for encouraging their stupidity-driven arrogance for lo these many years. Although, really, I suppose they're too limited to do much actual damage with their "mission" except to the wallets of their U.S. donors -- and most of those people are probably just like the Duggars except that they're less fertile and never got a tv show. So I can't say that I really care what happens to their wallets.

Edited by Churchhoney
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Another point: the photo was posted today. The weather in Central America is currently highs in the mid 80's to 90's, lows in the 70's. It is very humid in Central America and almost no one has air conditioning. Can you imagine how hot that little guy was bundled up like that and screaming? He could easily develop heat exhaustion or even heat stroke in minutes in that environment wrapped up in a blanket.

Actually, Antigua is surrounded by volcanoes, so it doesn't get as warm there as other places. The high yesterday was 76ish with a low in the upper 50's (much like the area of Guatemala where I live). It does get chilly at night, so i dont have a problem with a blanket. That being said, Izzy is way too old to be swaddled like that. Its like he has a straight jacket on. Poor thing.

Also, the twins birthday meal... I have never seen a Papa John's anywhere down here. Domino's is huge. I have my next mission... because, well, Papa John's is good. And maybe I would run in to the Dullards.

One more thing, because I love the people of Guatemala so much... it is not necessary for Jill and Derick to look like scrubs all the time. There is water down there (and most of the time it's hot!) I see pictures on the IG and think "Wow, way to represent the 'missions' life." There really is no excuse. Sorry for the rant- They just get my blood boiling.

Edited by Guatemama3641
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Dammit, if only there were some Americans there with time on their hands who could befriend this family and  help these boys learn some English. Throw money at this please and we'll make sure it gets to them. Suuuuuuure.

Haha- if I was in Antigua regularly, I would "totally " friend them. I'm catholic so I would pretend I need saving. And I'd say it all in Spanish. I really can't quite get a bead on where in Antigua they are. Some of the places look familiar to me, but then they post some where I have no clue. I'm hoping to get over there sometime in January. I'll keep an eye out as always.

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If your kid is in distress, in a way that Izzy obviously is, you don't grab a camera. And if you are enough of a bastard who takes a picture of your kid having a meltdown, you don't post it on social media. Shaming people is not a good parenting method. Also, that kind of karma bus comes around to bite you in the ass. Good luck being old and completely dependent on someone's care and they take photos of you in your worst moments... and posts them to whatever the internet looks like then.

Beep beep Jilly Muffin. Beep beep.

Edited by FakeJoshDuggar
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If your kid is in distress, in a way that Izzy obviously is, you don't grab a camera. And if you are enough of a bastard who takes a picture of your kid having a meltdown, you don't post it on social media. Shaming people is not a good parenting method. Also, that kind of karma bus comes around to bite you in the ass. Good luck being old and completely dependent on someone's care and they take photos of you in your worst moments... and posts them to whatever the internet looks like then.

Beep beep Jilly Muffin. Beep beep.

Come on now,  she learned that when your kid is hurt or in distress you grab the IPhone so you can record it all for later amusement from her momma. 

Edited by Fuzzysox
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Do you think Derick tried to "save" or preach the good word to his Wal-Mart coworkers? Luckily, he probably didn't have time since clingy Jilly took up his lunch break.

Does anyone remember what the Jerick timeline was? When did Jill & Boob visit him in Nepal when THE courtship started? All's I remember is the wedding was June 2014. Counting back for the usual 3 month engagement and the 3 month courtship, it would bring it back to around January 2014.

As another poster stated, I wonder if this is what Derick had in mind for his life. I'm sure he wasn't prepared for Jilly Muffin's clinginess or that her education amounted to barely nothing. Cathy probably wasn't prepared either. Oh I wish we could get her husband to talk & spill some beans we don't know about.......

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The Nepal trip was mid November 2013. Engagement was late February/early March, wedding in mid June.

  

Thanks SewSumi, I knew I could count on you.

He Christmas caroled at Jill's house in 2011.

Hmm....I forgot about that. Is that when Jill said she doesn't remember him being there? How does a group of carolers gain entrance to the compound? Details? (Looking at you, SewSumi :)

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