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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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Rather interesting they put Jill front and center considering she's the least attractive and least photogenic of the sisters. Being Daddy's favorite comes with privileges, apparently.

I think Jill and Jana are the most attractive on that cover. Mileage very obviously varies. 

  • Love 3
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Interesting take, Missy Vixen. So do you think Jill is hiding out in CA as a way to avoid a deposition in the civil suit? Which then begs the question, is there something even worse the Duggars are hiding and it just hasn't come out yet?

If Jill's hiding out for legal reasons, I would think it has to be more with her midwife stuff then anything to do with Josh. If Jim Bob and Michelle was that afraid of legal action, the whole family would be doing missionary work in CA. That makes me think Jill's gotten herself into something on her own that she's hiding from.

As for Derick, they don't have transportation in Antigua other then walking. Didn't he say he walks at least two miles round trip just to school? I would bet that Jill is making meals for the whole family without making sure that Derick is following a specialized diet. So "healthier" eating + increased activity means he's going to keep shedding weight.

Edited by Saylii
  • Love 2
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As for Derick, they don't have transportation in Antigua other then walking. Didn't he say he walks at least two miles round trip just to school? I would bet that Jill is making meals for the whole family without making sure that Derick is following a specialized diet. So "healthier" eating + increased activity means he's going to keep shedding weight.

I really don't think that walking two miles a day is something that demands extra food, that's just a short stroll. His unability to gain weight is probably a combination of a troublesome mouth and the naturally high metabolism of a twenty-something young male.

  • Love 2
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What is going on with Derick? Was just looking at Jill's instagram and Derick doesn't look well. I mean he always looks like he needs a shower and a haircut, but in certain pics his eyes look totally "swollen"/dark circles and in pics where he's wearing a t shirt, it's kind of surprising to see how thin his arms/entire body looks. Even a 26 yr old male who doesn't work out has a certain amount of bicep muscle; even in the birthday pic of Jed/Jer -- they look a bit bigger than their brother in law and they're only 17. It looks like he's lost weight everywhere, which happens to people when they're several decades older than him. I know the surgery took his toll bc he couldn't eat, but honestly after such a rough surgery/recovery -- couldn't they have put off their "mission." I don't see how learning Spanish and preaching the gospel can't wait until next yr -- it's not like those opportunities are time limited in any way. You'd think it'd be easier to recover in the relative comforts of the U.S. rather than the developing world. And if they HAD to go/he really desperately wanted to get away from the Duggar scandals/didn't want to change his plans -- I wonder if he's doing anything to bolster his health while he's there. He looks like he should be eating as much as he can and then supplementing every meal with Ensure/Boost/nutrition drinks just for the calories. Not sure if that's available in Central America but developing nations typically do have nutrition supplements on the market, as they tend to have lots of folks who just cannot afford adequate nutrition and are prescribed those things if their health gets bad.

 

To some extent I think this is genetic.  I met a friend of a friend on the street with his 2-3 year old son, and the son already had pronounced dark circles under his eyes (as did the father-friend).  Also my best friend in high school was 88 pounds and 4'11".  Chick worked at Mickey D's on summers off from college and ate their food daily.  She was hungrier much often than I, the sturdy farmers'-daughter-framed one.  If the family got ice cream bars or doughnuts, she ate two at a sitting.  Not having paid attention too much in health class I guess, she had to be specifically told that sometimes "stomach gurgles" are digestive noises, and not hunger pangs; from which I deduced that she was feeding herself every time her stomach made a peep.

Edited by queenanne
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Just some random thoughts:

*I have had friends swaddle their babies (and i have done it too). But when the babies were swaddled they were also held by a parent/adult and sometimes rocked or sung to.  They were not left just lying there screaming.  

*Derrick looks terrible - I think it is as someone upthread said - stress over everything that has happened in the past year plus a clingy wife and a domineering father-in-law.

*Jill is dumb - does she truly believe that she is a real midwife? Or is she holding onto what others in their "fundy" circle keep telling her?  Does she really believe that she could be helpful to others? How? She doesn't want to do things without Derrick because according to her upbringing she cannot be trusted to be anywhere outside the house alone. Sometimes I feel such pity for her lack of education, knowledge, and self-awareness. Other times I just want to shake her/

*Do they (Derrick and Jill) really believe that they are contributing to Catholics conversion to Christianity  (Catholics are Christians despite what anyone else thinks!)

Okay - I'm done.

  • Love 6
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I agree with JoanArc. It's a nice way of avoiding what's happening in their families and putting themselves out of reach for any of the legal hijinks. I realize I'm already Cynical McCrankypants, but who acts like this? Seriously. Instead of putting the bucks they banked from TLC, People and God knows what other entities are paying them to good use to get trained as actual missionaries, they're playing patty-cake with SOS and "evangetourism". They're not fooling anyone but themselves. If they really wanted to do good and learn Spanish where they could also deal with Triple D's recovery and the fact that Jilly Muffin is going to have to live in the OB/GYN's office for her next Precious Blessing, there's a hundred communities around the United States that would be more suitable than a living in a country that they don't speak the language well enough to have an actual conversation with anyone who's not pre-approved.

 

Triple D can run, but at some point it's going to become clear: He can't live on the "mission field" indefinitely without a steady influx of cash. Is SOS paying them that well? It would be fascinating to know how they think they're getting enough cash now that it's been widely disseminated that they're not forthcoming on what they're doing with the donations. This is an awful lot of fuss and bother for a spinoff show. There's another reason why they're doing this. And I am wondering how long it will be before that reason (or "reasons") explodes all over the tabloids.

 

Could be, but I have to say that, if I woke up and realized that I'd married someone who was going to attach me to Jim Bob for the rest of my life, I might run well to another country with no other plan but escaping my in-laws.

 

I still think that the main impetus here could be that Derick had no idea whatsoever what he was getting into by marrying Jill Duggar and when he started to find out grabbed his little family and ran, since he had no idea what to do about being eaten alive by scary Duggardom, but he did (sort of, he thought) know how to be a pretend missionary.

 

No matter what it is that triggered the run, though, they seem to be sort of eternally left without a plan. Will be interesting to see what the hell they ever do. But I could say that about the other kids as well, especially the other two married couples. It's just mind-boggling to think about an extended family with not one but three young married couples a-pumping out the younguns, with not a single young parent out of the six having an actual job. And everybody acting as if this is somehow normal and not a gigantic accelerating problem, including tons of "fans," who act as if it's great. I keep wondering what those fans would think if they had a burgeoning horde of folks like this in their own families.

  • Love 20
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Derick wanted to be a missionary or at least wanted a reason to bum around other countries.  We met him in Nepal.  CA is a step down for him but he has the old ball and chain now.  I don't think Walmart wanted him anymore.  That may have been the catalyst for the bad timing of leaving and getting the mouth surgery.  While they were in the mcmansion he was shown studying mission work.  But I do think the timing had to do with the job situation.  This is no way to give Jill independence, however.  No matter what, she won't take independence.  She can't even imagine a way to drag her ass to school for a couple of hours a day.  The school perhaps wanted to put her in another class and at another time than Derick.  Hell to the no.  Can't do that.

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Does anyone else get the vibe that Jill is so uncomfortable with "Miss Cathy"? It feels like she is afraid that Cathy's pants wearing worldliness will somehow rub off on her and that Cathy is not Christian enough for her. I also wonder if Jill could even manage a real conversation with Cathy.

 

I imagine Cathy saying something to the effect of, "When Derrick was this age he was crawling all over the house and getting into things." and Jill saying, "You didn't teach him to stay on a blanket?"

 

I can also imagine Cathy swaying with Izzy on her hip singing a kiddie song too him and Jill looking on horrified at Cathy interacting lovingly with a child over six months and 'dancing' with a baby.

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Does anyone else get the vibe that Jill is so uncomfortable with "Miss Cathy"? It feels like she is afraid that Cathy's pants wearing worldliness will somehow rub off on her and that Cathy is not Christian enough for her. I also wonder if Jill could even manage a real conversation with Cathy.

 

I imagine Cathy saying something to the effect of, "When Derrick was this age he was crawling all over the house and getting into things." and Jill saying, "You didn't teach him to stay on a blanket?"

 

I can also imagine Cathy swaying with Izzy on her hip singing a kiddie song too him and Jill looking on horrified at Cathy interacting lovingly with a child over six months and 'dancing' with a baby.

Agreed 100%, and very well put, GeeGolly ! I feel like there's also some world-class side-eye just radiating from Jill toward Cathy, even if she remains sweet/neutral on the outside. My guess is that Cathy, a Fundie's Fundie by my standards, at least, isn't quite Fundie enough for Jill's taste. The pants-wearing, sassy-haircut-having, actually had a JOB Mother-In-Law is also probably very intimidating to Jill - Cathy is, after all, educated and well-spoken - and bound to create fear in JillyMuffyn's little brain. You're always supposed to fear, and maybe even hate, things you don't understand in the DuggarDome, 'ya know. They all react to unfamiliar or challenging things like the movie version of Frankenstein's monster - "Grrrrr... ! Fire BAD !!!"

 

As fo Jill having a "real" conversation with "Miss Cathy" ? HA !!! Jill can't manage a real conversation with her own husband, parents, or siblings ! I doubt she's ever had a real conversation with anyone in her entire life. 

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Cathy was a professionally educated and gainfully employed Christian woman who survived being widowed. They're pure myth in Jill's world.

What the Duggar machine doesn't like to say is that Cathy and Rick were divorced before he died. She wasn't technically a widow at all.

  • Love 5
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Does anyone else get the vibe that Jill is so uncomfortable with "Miss Cathy"? It feels like she is afraid that Cathy's pants wearing worldliness will somehow rub off on her and that Cathy is not Christian enough for her. I also wonder if Jill could even manage a real conversation with Cathy.

 

I haven't really been watching this stuff. But, very sad. Must be uncomfortable to watch.... I do have a feeling that Jill -- and most of the rest of the Duggar kids, probably -- would give off a similar vibe around any "outsider." The fact is, they're not comfortable with anyone -- including not only their immediate family but their very selves -- I think. But by now they're numb to the presence of their fam and some of the extended Gothardom, so the overall discomfort at home isn't obvious. And their whole upbringing has been devoted to warning them off real conversations, too, I think.

 

As fo Jill having a "real" conversation with "Miss Cathy" ? HA !!! Jill can't manage a real conversation with her own husband, parents, or siblings ! I doubt she's ever had a real conversation with anyone in her entire life. 

 

And she may never have one, I would guess. I think now it's up to Derick and Izzy to force her to and educate her to this, if they realize it and if they will and can. And who knows whether one is and the other will be up to that task?

 

Among their false-face family living pretty much in a single room all the time (in Duggar-Dome... love that), Gothardism, and manicuring their lives for suitability to tv, the concept of real conversation got killed off in all these kids, I expect.

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What? Why have I never heard this?

This obituary says Rick W Dillard was survived by his wife, and county records show that the family home, purchased in solely Rick Dillard's name in 1988, became solely Cathy Dillard's after he died. If they were divorced, I think what was his and what was hers would've been decided and settled before he died.

I don't think they were divorced, and I can't find any evidence that says they were.

Edited by Kokapetl
  • Love 7
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What is going on with Derick? Was just looking at Jill's instagram and Derick doesn't look well. I mean he always looks like he needs a shower and a haircut, but in certain pics his eyes look totally "swollen"/dark circles and in pics where he's wearing a t shirt, it's kind of surprising to see how thin his arms/entire body looks. Even a 26 yr old male who doesn't work out has a certain amount of bicep muscle; even in the birthday pic of Jed/Jer -- they look a bit bigger than their brother in law and they're only 17. It looks like he's lost weight everywhere, which happens to people when they're several decades older than him. I know the surgery took his toll bc he couldn't eat, but honestly after such a rough surgery/recovery -- couldn't they have put off their "mission." I don't see how learning Spanish and preaching the gospel can't wait until next yr -- it's not like those opportunities are time limited in any way. You'd think it'd be easier to recover in the relative comforts of the U.S. rather than the developing world. And if they HAD to go/he really desperately wanted to get away from the Duggar scandals/didn't want to change his plans -- I wonder if he's doing anything to bolster his health while he's there. He looks like he should be eating as much as he can and then supplementing every meal with Ensure/Boost/nutrition drinks just for the calories. Not sure if that's available in Central America but developing nations typically do have nutrition supplements on the market, as they tend to have lots of folks who just cannot afford adequate nutrition and are prescribed those things if their health gets bad.

We aren't the only ones wondering...

http://www.inquisitr.com/2681475/fans-reveal-concern-for-jill-duggar-dillards-husband-derick-after-new-photos-revealed/

  • Love 2
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SOS has officially appointed the Dullards to serve on their Latin American outreach team. This begs the question: did SOS fund their language lessons? Housing? We know that the Dullards assisted SOS on the late summer and December missioncations. Were they paid for those as well? Even if they paid for rent/food/school out of pocket from their TLC money, did they REALLY need those leghumper donations? Can someone who knows something about how missions are run shed some light onto this? 

 

Sorry the source is Lily and Ellie's blog; SOS hasn't updated their newspage in about a month. 

 

http://www.duggarfamilyblog.com/2016/01/dillards-to-serve-with-sos.html

  • Love 5
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It was in the latest SOS newsletter along with some other scary SOS stuff 

I got the willies when I went to that page looking for the primary source. Their site is shitty, and obviously doesn't direct one well to the latest information. 

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SOS has officially appointed the Dullards to serve on their Latin American outreach team. This begs the question: did SOS fund their language lessons? Housing? We know that the Dullards assisted SOS on the late summer and December missioncations. Were they paid for those as well? Even if they paid for rent/food/school out of pocket from their TLC money, did they REALLY need those leghumper donations? Can someone who knows something about how missions are run shed some light onto this? 

 

Sorry the source is Lily and Ellie's blog; SOS hasn't updated their newspage in about a month. 

 

http://www.duggarfamilyblog.com/2016/01/dillards-to-serve-with-sos.html

 

Jill's going to preach. Uh-huh. In Spanish. Uh-huh. ... Might as well try some indigenous dialect as well, as long as we're being ambitious. ...Guessing there'll be a lot of that mimed preaching going on. 

  • Love 3
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Jill's going to preach. Uh-huh. In Spanish. Uh-huh. ... Might as well try some indigenous dialect as well, as long as we're being ambitious. ...Guessing there'll be a lot of that mimed preaching going on. 

 

What's she going to do, stand there and giggle and say "Si" over and over?

  • Love 9
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Since when is marriage neglected in CA? Seriously, this makes no sense to me.

 

Oh, yanno, all that machismo.  Clearly Latino men have time for nothing else other than puffing up their chests and posturing.

Edited by queenanne
  • Love 3
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Every time SOS comes up, all I can see is the casual, thoughtless cultural bigotry and arrogance of their whole "program" or whatever the hell it is. Maybe a stealth tourism operation clothed as "missionary work" so they can profit from church donations as well as from the fundietourists' fees and the fundietourists can say that they went to CA to "work and minister" and not vacation? Or an ugly-American reachout program, teaching people around the world that, yes, we in the United States really are the arrogant clueless jerks that others have said we are?

 

Seriously. I can't imagine what the local people are thinking when Derick and Jill pull up with their flock of missioncationers to "preach" and "minister," without knowing the language or the culture or, in fact, knowing anything at all about anything at all. Maybe -- "What the fuck? How insulting! But I guess we should pretend to go along with it because I suppose this gang of yahoos'll bring in some tourist dollars. And they'll go away soon."

Edited by Churchhoney
  • Love 17
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This obituary says Rick W Dillard was survived by his wife, and county records show that the family home, purchased in solely Rick Dillard's name in 1988, became solely Cathy Dillard's after he died. If they were divorced, I think what was his and what was hers would've been decided and settled before he died.

I don't think they were divorced, and I can't find any evidence that says they were.

Good detective work! Yes, it does not at all look like they were divorced. Maybe the OP was thinking of Amy's on again, off again parents who are now officially off again.

 

Oh, yanno, all that machismo.  Clearly Latino men have time for nothing else other than puffing up their chests and posturing.

Exactly... which sounds absolutely NOTHING like Jim Boob! :)

 

I was appalled at how little Spanish JIll and Derick knew upon arriving. Not to be mean, but it's a Latin based language. It's way easier to learn than, say, Russian or Chinese. They had ages to prepare and they waited to GET THERE before taking lessons? I just don't understand it. They had all the time in the world to learn it in the US.

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"Did SOS write in a new requirement so Jill would qualify as an SOSer. Is that why she took the Midwifery exam?"

 

Good question. And I have another -- Do we know that SOS actually has any requirements, aside from completing a level of language training? If so, can somebody say what they are?

 

I gather that SOS is pretty heavily inculcated with the Gothard gang, given Mr. SOS's featured presence at camps and such. Does anybody know what other church/cult/relig-org groups they're officially or semi-officially involved with? ...And, uh, given current events, I wonder how comfortable they're feeling if Gothardites make up a large portion of their revenue base? ... And ... HA HA.

Edited by Churchhoney
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Things that make you say WTF.

 

From http://www.soshope.org/about/current-projects/

 

"The core of S.O.S. is to plant churches throughout the world and raise up local leaders to not only run the church, but also to plant their own churches in locations that have never had an evangelistic witness in keeping with the philosophy of the Apostle Paul, who wrote, “It has always been my ambition to preach the gospel where Christ was not known, so that I would not be building on someone else’s foundation.”

 

"Not only are the local people enslaved to their sin..."

 

"Local pastors throughout the countries we serve in are often ill equipped and untrained to care for the flocks under their care."

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"The core of S.O.S. is to plant churches throughout the world and raise up local leaders to not only run the church, but also to plant their own churches in locations that have never had an evangelistic witness in keeping with the philosophy of the Apostle Paul, who wrote

evangelistic witness = long-term vacationing Christians (ie Jill and Derick). They don't actually have to do anything other than 'witness'.

  • Love 10
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The line about local people enslaved to sin just needs to go.  Who are they to pass judgement? 

 

I think the Cathy and Rick were divorced was an internet gossip line that somehow didn't get refuted often enough so stuck in memory for many people. I eventually got tired of correcting it.  People knew that Derick's mom remarried so made a jump to divorce and kept posting it as fact.

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And it is THIS that defines judgementalness and arrogant self righteousness, and why I am not a fan of organized religion, as it seems an antithesis of itself.

 

I'm still confused as to why Roman Catholics aren't considered Christian. I grew up in the church and remember quite vividly the crucifix above the altar, Easter and Christmas services, etc., etc., etc. What were we doing if we weren't being Christians?

  • Love 8
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It's a line that a certain faction of Christians keep pushing because they depend on the "being saved" doctrine.  Anyone who doesn't follow the four or five step plan is not "christian" in their minds.  Gothard and the Duggars are completely submerged in that view of faith.  They are all about getting people to pray the prayer and "be saved" and then not worry about them any more.  That view is why my stay in evangelical Christianity was very brief.  It all had to do with a pastor and his group who caused an elderly woman to break her leg, but they didn't care about that.  They had to "witness" to her while she writhed in pain waiting for the ambulance.  He was very proud of that story and I wanted nothing to do with an alleged faith that found that either good behavior or good sermon material.  The Duggars and Gothard would have applauded his approach of there is never a bad time to "witness."  Jill and Derick have both been brought up with kind of thought process and apparently have never had any reason to question it.  They are all about getting people to pray the prayer and see things their way. 

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Things that make you say WTF.

 

From http://www.soshope.org/about/current-projects/

 

"The core of S.O.S. is to plant churches throughout the world and raise up local leaders to not only run the church, but also to plant their own churches in locations that have never had an evangelistic witness in keeping with the philosophy of the Apostle Paul, who wrote, “It has always been my ambition to preach the gospel where Christ was not known, so that I would not be building on someone else’s foundation.”

 

"Not only are the local people enslaved to their sin..."

 

"Local pastors throughout the countries we serve in are often ill equipped and untrained to care for the flocks under their care."

 

Wow. They should change their name to Insults R Us      

 

(Hey -- IRU --- Maybe then they could link up with RU and ... I don't know what. Maybe be even exponentially more stupid and grifty than either group alone?)

Edited by Churchhoney
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As a Catholic I have met Christians who didn't think I was truly a Christian because they believed Catholics worship Mary and pray to statues.  This seems to be a common belief among the more fervent fundamentalists.  I don't know if Jill and Derek hold this opinion but I would not be surprised.

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As a Catholic I have met Christians who didn't think I was truly a Christian because they believed Catholics worship Mary and pray to statues.  This seems to be a common belief among the more fervent fundamentalists.  I don't know if Jill and Derek hold this opinion but I would not be surprised.

Doesn't Bin lead the charge of Catholics are not Christians? IDK but Jill and Derick are a waste of space in CA. None of us understand why the hell they are preaching to diehard Catholics??? What a waste of an education Derick. If you wanted to be a do nothing grifter than you should have not gone to college.

  • Love 6
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Agreed 100%, and very well put, GeeGolly ! I feel like there's also some world-class side-eye just radiating from Jill toward Cathy, even if she remains sweet/neutral on the outside. My guess is that Cathy, a Fundie's Fundie by my standards, at least, isn't quite Fundie enough for Jill's taste. The pants-wearing, sassy-haircut-having, actually had a JOB Mother-In-Law is also probably very intimidating to Jill - Cathy is, after all, educated and well-spoken - and bound to create fear in JillyMuffyn's little brain. You're always supposed to fear, and maybe even hate, things you don't understand in the DuggarDome, 'ya know. They all react to unfamiliar or challenging things like the movie version of Frankenstein's monster - "Grrrrr... ! Fire BAD !!!"

 

As fo Jill having a "real" conversation with "Miss Cathy" ? HA !!! Jill can't manage a real conversation with her own husband, parents, or siblings ! I doubt she's ever had a real conversation with anyone in her entire life. 

 

Love this. Completely agree. I find myself wishing I could download their previous conversations from iTunes. I can't imagine how stilted and false Jill, and maybe even Cathy, must sound together.

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As a Catholic I have met Christians who didn't think I was truly a Christian because they believed Catholics worship Mary and pray to statues.  This seems to be a common belief among the more fervent fundamentalists.  I don't know if Jill and Derek hold this opinion but I would not be surprised.

 

It's been a long time since I've done any reading about church history, but from what I remember, Catholics were the ORIGINAL Christians. Martin Luther and the Reformation created Protestantism ["protest" - get it?] and Henry VIII broke away from the [Catholic] Pope to create the Anglican/Episcopal branch. Duggars - any rebuttal?

 

PS - if this needs to be moved to another thread, sorry and please do so. I still don't know how to do that.

Edited by Wellfleet
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