Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Monkeyrocks]

9 hours ago, hathorlive said:

I'm confused as to why they have so many kids when they clearly don't care much for children or exerting energy to do anything special for anyone.  It's nice that Izzy didn't get a generic "you are a child of god, and a godly person whom god loves in a godly way" tripe that they recycle for each kid.  I think Jill is really seeing the benefit of not having kids in litters and getting to give her boys the attention she never received.

As for that awesome fish cake, it beats a store bought cake any day.  It's hard to get all that icing to cooperate.  Good job, Jill! Now go send Sam off to Grandma's and pour yourself a cocktail.

I agree. I see nothing wrong with homemade birthday cakes. I’ve done them for my daughter. My mom did them for me. My daughter made me one when she was 12. And, it takes a pretty good deal of time to decorate a cake, even if it’s not polished. It’sxreally the little things that count - the personalised cake, colours and all, favourite cereal for breakfast, dinner at Taco Bell, getting his birthday announced on the radio. And, honestly? Most of that isn’t going to cost a lot more than normal. What it does take is time and a willingness to buy the favourite food, call the radio station, make/decorate the cake, etc. 

And, as a teacher, I love that his parents support his love and enthusiasm for school, and were willing to plan it perfectly for him to hear both announcements. It bodes well

Edited April 7, 2021 by Monkeyrocks

[hathorlive]

1 minute ago, Monkeyrocks said:

I agree. I see nothing wrong with homemade birthday cakes. I’ve done them for my daughter. My mom did them for me. My daughter made me one when she was 12. And, it takes a pretty good deal of time to decorate a cake, even if it’s not polished. It’sxreally the little things that count - the personalised cake, colours and all, favourite cereal for breakfast, dinner at Taco Bell, getting husband announced on the radio. And, honestly? Most of that isn’t going to cost a lot more than normal. What it does take is time and a willingness to buy the favourite food, call the radio station, make/decorate the cake, etc. 

And, as a teacher, I love that his parents support his love and enthusiasm for school, and were willing to plan it perfectly for him to hear both announcements. It bodes well

I had never had a "store bought" cake until I went to college.  My mom tried to find a way to send me her special but plain cakes.  Great memories come from the effort and the love.  I loved the cake.  I think the world gets so caught up in baking shows with ridiculous wedding cakes and kid's birthday parties with professional planners that they miss the point of just being together and celebrating. It's sad.  We grew up in a much simpler time.  

I am also excited that Izzy loves to go to school.  It helps Jill with the decision to go with public schooling seeing how happy Izzy is.  I hope she realizes that it frees up her days so she can pick up a hobby or volunteer or get a job.  The future is so bright for these kids, despite their religious environment.  But after hearing Derrick speak logic on young earth/old earth, there may be even MORE hope.

[MargeGunderson]

25 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

Jill's birthday planning is by far much better than Jessa's birthday week full of Amazon tool gifts arriving by the day and a box of crackers 

To be fair, that kid seems to love crackers.

[libgirl2]

I love Lucky Charms. I would pick it for a birthday breakfast! 

[ozziemom]

No more Duggar time for Jill, yay! Being punctual is an excellent life skill. I’m guessing it was tough for Jill but kudos to her. And Izzy’s birthday seemed perfect for a six year old. 

[charmed1]

That’s nice that Jill can give her children what she didn’t have. It seems she’s able to relive some of her childhood through her sons. As a summer baby, I was always jealous of the kids who got cupcakes and birthday wishes at school. Jill and James’ birthdays were the two that I most remember. JB & Michelle took Jill to a restaurant and gave her a necklace and a bag of candy. James...well, who could ever forget the worst 19K&C birthday ever? Spent at the NICU with Mother of the Year and Precious Miracle and forced to pick his own gift out from the hospital gift shop.

[Quilt Fairy]

14 hours ago, farmgal4 said:

"Bill Gothard allowed families to have one small pet dog, but not to give it too much love as it might become an idol."

You'll notice Gothard didn't try that shit on a cat. 

Old joke:

"Give a dog a home, food, and affection and they'll think you're a god.

Give a cat a home, food, and affection and they'll think they're a god. "

[Spencer Hastings]

It’s nice to see one of the Duggar kids have an age appropriate birthday. I’m not at all surprised that Jill would be the one to know her kids, their likes, and really want to make their day special. She was so involved with her buddy team and they seemed to adore her.  Motherhood seemed touch and go for a minute there while she worked through her own issues, so I’m glad that her kids get to experience this version of her. 

[ginger90]

Israel got a 24 hour post in Instagram stories.

[Tikichick]

11 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

To be fair, that kid seems to love crackers.

His parents don't see to it he's put to bed, do they see to it he's fed actual meals?

[MargeGunderson]

16 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

His parents don't see to it he's put to bed, do they see to it he's fed actual meals?

Combined with Jessa’s lack of cooking skills, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s mainly just snacking. 

[Tikichick]

4 minutes ago, MargeGunderson said:

Combined with Jessa’s lack of cooking skills, I wouldn’t be surprised if he’s mainly just snacking. 

Your comment made me think of the observation @GeeGolly made recently about the signs Spurgeon may be showing of a neglected child learning to take care of himself.   You've got me wondering if the constant crackers are much more than just a love of crackers or a love of snacking, and are actually Henry actually taking it upon himself in a way that he can to see that he is fed.

[charmed1]

On 4/5/2021 at 3:36 PM, crazy8s said:

good again for Jill on responsible pet ownership

from Recovering Grace - Gothard's views on pet ownership

"Bill Gothard allowed families to have one small pet dog, but not to give it too much love as it might become an idol."

What a sick, weak, pathetic bum. I suppose he’s slightly better than Warren Jeffs who ordered all the dogs on the compound to be killed. 

[cmr2014]

29 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

Your comment made me think of the observation @GeeGolly made recently about the signs Spurgeon may be showing of a neglected child learning to take care of himself.   You've got me wondering if the constant crackers are much more than just a love of crackers or a love of snacking, and are actually Henry actually taking it upon himself in a way that he can to see that he is fed.

That's what I was thinking. Henry may "love" crackers the same way that the denizens of the TTH "love" eating green beans out of the can. When you're hungry, you "love" something to eat.

[doodlebug]

3 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

That's what I was thinking. Henry may "love" crackers the same way that the denizens of the TTH "love" eating green beans out of the can. When you're hungry, you "love" something to eat.

Yeah, I think Henry 'loves' crackers because they're stored someplace where he can get them himself when he's hungry and they fill him up since he cannot depend on his mother and father to provide him with regular, healthy meals

[Spazamanaz]

Just now, charmed1 said:

What a sick, weak, pathetic bum. I suppose he’s slightly better than Warren Jeffs who ordered all the dogs on the compound to be killed. 

Yah Warren Jeffs is all kinds of fucked up.

[MargeGunderson]

29 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

That's what I was thinking. Henry may "love" crackers the same way that the denizens of the TTH "love" eating green beans out of the can. When you're hungry, you "love" something to eat.

I think this is just one more example of how the experiences of the Duggar kids growing up have left them with a twisted sense of what “normal” is. It must be a shock to the people who marry into the family, especially since they have such limited and stilted interactions with each other before they get married. 

[xwordfanatik]

10 hours ago, Quilt Fairy said:

You'll notice Gothard didn't try that shit on a cat. 

Old joke:

"Give a dog a home, food, and affection and they'll think you're a god.

Give a cat a home, food, and affection and they'll think they're a god. "

Ha!  "Cats and women will do as they please, men and dogs better get used to the idea."  I don't know who said it, but I like it.

Jill is the new 'hot one.'  At least compared to frumpy Jessa.  

[emma675]

1 hour ago, Tikichick said:

Your comment made me think of the observation @GeeGolly made recently about the signs Spurgeon may be showing of a neglected child learning to take care of himself.   You've got me wondering if the constant crackers are much more than just a love of crackers or a love of snacking, and are actually Henry actually taking it upon himself in a way that he can to see that he is fed.

Good lord, that makes me so sad. I wonder if as they get older, Spurgeon and Henry and the others will be jealous of the way Israel and Sam have grown up? Iz and Sam have parents who openly love and care for them, make sure they are well fed, have a routine, go to school with other kids, and almost always seem clean and put together. Even when Jessa cleans up her kids for photo shoots, they still have this slightly feral look when compared to Jill's kids somehow. I'm not making fun of their looks at all, Jessa just doesn't seem to know how to make them look as clean and put together as Jill does with hers. 

[Madtown]

I think that Jill did great for Israel's birthday. It's been said severeal times, that she did all the things Israel wanted when asked. She has come a long way from the mom she was a few years ago. I'm sure therapy has helped that. I look at the excitment on Israel's face when hearing his name on the radio. Then I think about how bored Spurgeon looked as Henry opened one damn gift a day for a week. I think that Jill has become so much more about the kids and doesn't constantly talk about having more(at least not publicly). Jessa is clearly about "how many kids can I have."

I love that Israel got to celebrate his birthday at school with his friends. I feel so incredibly sorry for Spurgeon not being able to go to school. He so clearly needs it. I often wonder if when Jessa is by Jill(not sure how much that happens), if Israel talks to Spurgeon about school? I so want him to do that and want Spurgeon to beg Jessa to go and constantly ask her why he can't. Instead, he's about to be tossed aside for another baby and probably more down the road.

 

[laurakaye]

18 hours ago, ginger90 said:

In both of these pictures, Izzy seems to have a genuinely excited and happy smile on his face because it's his birthday and he's six years old and he's being made to feel very special both at home and at school.  It's not the forced rictus grin of a child being told to smile for mommy's camera because it's his birthday and he's supposed to feel happy even though he really doesn't.  Jill - well done.  WELL.  DONE.

Now all I need to see is a picture of Izzy in a t-ball uniform with a bat over his shoulder, or smiling with a group of boys and girls learning how to play basketball, or showing off a picture he drew at school that the teacher displayed in his classroom and my heart will explode. 🙂

[laurakaye]

27 minutes ago, Madtown said:

I love that Israel got to celebrate his birthday at school with his friends. I feel so incredibly sorry for Spurgeon not being able to go to school. He so clearly needs it. I often wonder if when Jessa is by Jill(not sure how much that happens), if Israel talks to Spurgeon about school? I so want him to do that and want Spurgeon to beg Jessa to go and constantly ask her why he can't. Instead, he's about to be tossed aside for another baby and probably more down the road.

 

I wonder that too - on the rare occasions that Jill's boys hang out with any of their cousins, Iz and Sam are going to have fun and exciting stories to tell and things to talk about that none of the other kids will be able to relate to at all.  That is so sad.  But might this force Jill's sisters to double-down on the idea of sending their kids to school too because it would mean that they fully accept Jill and all her worldly ideas, even if it's to the detriment of their children?

[Tikichick]

54 minutes ago, emma675 said:

Good lord, that makes me so sad. I wonder if as they get older, Spurgeon and Henry and the others will be jealous of the way Israel and Sam have grown up? Iz and Sam have parents who openly love and care for them, make sure they are well fed, have a routine, go to school with other kids, and almost always seem clean and put together. Even when Jessa cleans up her kids for photo shoots, they still have this slightly feral look when compared to Jill's kids somehow. I'm not making fun of their looks at all, Jessa just doesn't seem to know how to make them look as clean and put together as Jill does with hers. 

IMO if there's any risk feelings of jealousy may arise, contact will be discontinued. 

[Tikichick]

50 minutes ago, Madtown said:

I think that Jill did great for Israel's birthday. It's been said severeal times, that she did all the things Israel wanted when asked. She has come a long way from the mom she was a few years ago. I'm sure therapy has helped that. I look at the excitment on Israel's face when hearing his name on the radio. Then I think about how bored Spurgeon looked as Henry opened one damn gift a day for a week. I think that Jill has become so much more about the kids and doesn't constantly talk about having more(at least not publicly). Jessa is clearly about "how many kids can I have."

I love that Israel got to celebrate his birthday at school with his friends. I feel so incredibly sorry for Spurgeon not being able to go to school. He so clearly needs it. I often wonder if when Jessa is by Jill(not sure how much that happens), if Israel talks to Spurgeon about school? I so want him to do that and want Spurgeon to beg Jessa to go and constantly ask her why he can't. Instead, he's about to be tossed aside for another baby and probably more down the road.

 

I wonder if any of the upswing with Jill is related at all to the fact her children are growing, becoming more independently capable, and whether she knows it or not, Jill might in fact not be a baby/small child person?    That might be difficult for Jill herself to sort out and recognize, if she could even bring herself to entertain the possibility without feeling sinful or wrong.   Therapy, embracing new ideas and living on a schedule have been seismic shifts in her life, so many things may still be very confusing for her.   I am a firm believer that the adoption of life on a schedule has probably helped significantly with some aspects of depression she likely had grown accustomed to.   That is a significant tool JB & M have at their disposal to keep the brood docile, even if they don't consciously recognize it as such.   

I'm now a mom of grown adults and I'm not entirely sure how much is because I'm older or how much is because I simply don't groove on putting on people's socks and shoes, getting every drink of water they need or changing diapers, but I only love babies in small doses where I know I can hand them back in X amount of time.   I do love me a baby snuggle, playing peek a boo with little ones and I wonder sometimes how mine can possibly have careers and be finishing up college, but I really wouldn't like to be faced with 24/7 mom duties of littles anymore.  

[lascuba]

11 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

IMO if there's any risk feelings of jealousy may arise, contact will be discontinued. 

The Duggars grew up with Amy around, who had a seemingly normalish childhoods. If they take after JB and Michelle at all, Jessa and the rest of them will be very good at spinning things so their kids feel pity rather than envy.

[Zella]

The hardcore homeschool fundies I know would cut off/discourage contact with kids in public school precisely because they considered it a bad influence as it made their own children curious about school. I think if Izzy starts making his cousins curious about public school, it's unfortunately not going to be a catalyst for their parents to consider public school. If anything, it will probably make them double-down on the decision to homeschool. We've seen Jessa do this time and again on loads of things--she will cut her nose off to spite her face.

 

4 minutes ago, lascuba said:

The Duggars grew up with Amy around, who had a seemingly normalish childhoods. If they take after JB and Michelle at all, Jessa and the rest of them will be very good at spinning things so their kids feel pity rather than envy.

Yes precisely! A lot of the fundies I knew would turn around stories about relatives asking reasonable questions about homeschooling into them being martyrs for the cause. 

Edited April 7, 2021 by Zella

[Tikichick]

1 minute ago, lascuba said:

The Duggars grew up with Amy around, who had a seemingly normalish childhoods. If they take after JB and Michelle at all, Jessa and the rest of them will be very good at spinning things so their kids feel pity rather than envy.

Hopefully you're right.   The new wrinkle with this generation is that Jill, one of their own, is now joining Amy in some of these behaviors, so the threat level may have gone up.

[libgirl2]

Izzy is just beaming. Jill did a good job for his birthday! 

[Tikichick]

Just now, libgirl2 said:

Izzy is just beaming. Jill did a good job for his birthday! 

Feels so hopeful to see genuine joy on his face. 

[Slakkie]

8 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

Feels so hopeful to see genuine joy on his face. 

I feel like Jill is really a MOM versus a broodmare for Christ (and I am Catholic LOL).  I feel like she has come so far and I see real JOY in their faces vs the brainwashing "joy" in many members of the family.  

[Tikichick]

It's occurred to me that Derick is also noticeably more relaxed, seemingly content.   Maybe it has something to do with Jill's changes, but by the same token his change in demeanor could be impacting her just as much.   Maybe Derick has finally found a path he has been searching for with pursuing a path in the legal field?   Maybe part of what we're seeing is Derick not anxiously flailing around for fulfillment?

[GeeGolly]

At this point if the boys talked about school they'd probably just assume their schools were the same.

I'm guessing this is a 'me thing', but I find it curious and unnecessary when parents compare and brag about the size of their kids. Short of being a JillR kind a parent, the size of kids is genetic and being tall isn't some grand thing.

[SMama]

Thinking about the Dillard and Seewald kids. Age and upbringing certainly make a difference. Both Derick and Ben were raised with schedules and clean homes. Both ended up under JB’s thumb with no foreseeable way to escape. Ben by need, Derick by choice.

Derick’s discontent with JB regardless of the reason was a saving grace for Jill and the kids. He had the education to move on and a supporting mom. Ben is about to have his fourth kid and is still dependent on JB to support his family.

Ben’s parents sacrificed their first born, still a teen, to have a Duggar connection. IIRC, Derick’s mom allegedly hoped he and Jill could talk alone. You know, like normal dating couples. Someone posted it happened at the airport when Derick returned from Nepal. Although I’m sure Cathy was initially equally happy about the Duggar connection.

Once Derick became disenchanted he had tools and support to make changes. Ben is stuck for life. Both families of origin have horrible beliefs. But Derick grew up with a working mother who became a widow rather young, and attended public school and college. He also has one sibling. To my knowledge Gwinn never worked outside the home and homeschooled her children.

I recall at the beginning of their marriage, pre Izzy, Derick talking about the need for a bedtime since he was working. A foreign concept to Jill and one she didn’t seem to like. 

It took Derick quite a few years but he was able to get his family to have a more structured life. Ben can’t even get his own kids on a freaking schedule. He went from a home where the mom cooked for the family to eating mostly eggs. Or going to the TTH to eat processed food he obviously disliked. 

The Seewald kids are Duggars through and through. It must chap Ben’s hide. His dreams of a Leave it to Beaver life and headship shattered. He’s JB’s slave and Jessa is the headship. I don’t see the Seewald kids ever going to school, Christian (no money) or public (evil).

Seeing the joy on Izzy’s face on the birthday day pictures gives me hope. No super spreader birthday for him at the TTH.  Watching the Seewald kids really saddens me. Even if Izzy and Sam are pitied or shunned they are going to be better off in the end.

Since this all started when Ben was a teen his parents bear a lot of responsibility. Way to screw up your kid and grandkids. I wonder how they feel when they see pictures of their unkempt, asleep wherever with crumbs on their clothes, neglected grandchildren.

I wonder what role if any Cathy played in Jill’s metamorphosis and Izzy going to public school. 

[leighdear]

Awesome birthday menu.  Sugar cereal, plus cake so far.  I'm assuming dinner is going to be cotton candy stuffed with jelly beans & gummy bears, with a side of Sweet Tarts and a Slurpie.  

He'll have diabetes and 3 teeth left by the time he leaves elementary school. 

[Tikichick]

Maybe part of what makes it so special to have a birthday is it's the one day you get to eat the goodies.   If the goodies really are reserved as special treats and not habits I think it won't cause any harm. 

[Tikichick]

38 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

At this point if the boys talked about school they'd probably just assume their schools were the same.

I'm guessing this is a 'me thing', but I find it curious and unnecessary when parents compare and brag about the size of their kids. Short of being a JillR kind a parent, the size of kids is genetic and being tall isn't some grand thing.

Do you think it was a brag to comment that it looks like he's on track to be taller than both dad and uncle?   I assumed he may have just had his physical and she was commenting her surprise about a prediction he's expected to be even taller than they expected.   

[Heathen]

13 minutes ago, leighdear said:

Awesome birthday menu.  Sugar cereal, plus cake so far.  I'm assuming dinner is going to be cotton candy stuffed with jelly beans & gummy bears, with a side of Sweet Tarts and a Slurpie.  

He'll have diabetes and 3 teeth left by the time he leaves elementary school. 

Lots of kids have sugar-packed birthdays, or even more frequent days like that, and they manage to survive grade school with teeth and without diabetes. 

 

[cmr2014]

1 hour ago, Tikichick said:

It's occurred to me that Derick is also noticeably more relaxed, seemingly content.   Maybe it has something to do with Jill's changes, but by the same token his change in demeanor could be impacting her just as much.   Maybe Derick has finally found a path he has been searching for with pursuing a path in the legal field?   Maybe part of what we're seeing is Derick not anxiously flailing around for fulfillment?

I was just thinking about this, too, and wondered of Derick had been receiving counseling as well. Whatever it is, I'm glad that they did it and hope that they continue. A couple of years ago, you couldn't have convinced me that they were anything other than miserable, and Izzy looked terrified all the time -- it's just night and day.

[Lady Whistleup]

I think that Spurge might act out soon. He appears to be a bright, inquisitive child who already looks jaded with the "smile, Spurge!" commands from his mom. So depressing.

[Tikichick]

10 minutes ago, Lady Whistleup said:

I think that Spurge might act out soon. He appears to be a bright, inquisitive child who already looks jaded with the "smile, Spurge!" commands from his mom. So depressing.

I have a hunch about one of the grandchildren being on the verge of becoming distinctly hard to handle, but it's not Spurgeon.   Sadly I think Spurgeon is fairly resigned to the way things are and generally already in the jaws of that depressed and docile trap that comes with being sentenced to do Duggar Time.

Gideon seems both highly spirited, very used to getting a lot of attention from mom and dad that he's now sharing more and more with an ever more mobile exploring sibling -- and most importantly IMO, has serious struggles with communication.   Kids who struggle to make themselves understood verbally generally begin acting out in frustration, tantrums, etc.    Somebody start speaking with and to this child, singing with him and looking into professional assistance ASAP please!   

[Panopticon]

48 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

Do you think it was a brag to comment that it looks like he's on track to be taller than both dad and uncle?   I assumed he may have just had his physical and she was commenting her surprise about a prediction he's expected to be even taller than they expected.   

That was my reading. It's his birthday and she's thinking about how much he's grown, to the extent that he's on pace to be taller than his fairly tall dad/uncle. Plus, this is something about which her followers, including her hate followers, have been curious. Izzy has always looked tall for his age (remember the Giant White Baby cracks in this thread during his toddler phase?). So she's publicly confirming that yes, he is tall. It seems a pretty innocent thing to say.

[GeeGolly]

1 hour ago, Tikichick said:

Do you think it was a brag to comment that it looks like he's on track to be taller than both dad and uncle?   I assumed he may have just had his physical and she was commenting her surprise about a prediction he's expected to be even taller than they expected.   

Yes I do. For two reasons, I see this IRL, and I have no doubt she wouldn't have mentioned anything if his growth chart projection was for him to be shorter. I have never once heard a parent say with pride, "My kid's in the 10th percentile, he/she is going to be short!".

[SMama]

12 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

I have a hunch about one of the grandchildren being on the verge of becoming distinctly hard to handle, but it's not Spurgeon.   Sadly I think Spurgeon is fairly resigned to the way things are and generally already in the jaws of that depressed and docile trap that comes with being sentenced to do Duggar Time.

Gideon seems both highly spirited, very used to getting a lot of attention from mom and dad that he's now sharing more and more with an ever more mobile exploring sibling -- and most importantly IMO, has serious struggles with communication.   Kids who struggle to make themselves understood verbally generally begin acting out in frustration, tantrums, etc.    Somebody start speaking with and to this child, singing with him and looking into professional assistance ASAP please!   

Sign language worked so well with my kids. My son had a speech delay and was indeed frustrated, acting out. Once the sign language was started his behavior changed significantly. It made speech therapy a breeze.  SGirl came home at 16 months old and had only heard Chinese her short life. We started sign language right after we met. Her first sign was more, and my eyes started leaking profusely. I regret dropping sign language with both. But being bilingual it seemed too much to add a third language. I wish they had that skill now. I can’t see Joy and Austin spending the time to get Gideon evaluated or trying sign language. Although the Little Rock appointment for Evy’s head bump gives me a smidge of hope. BTW, my adult son and SGirl still remember most of the signs. 

[Jynnan tonnix]

1 hour ago, Heathen said:

Lots of kids have sugar-packed birthdays, or even more frequent days like that, and they manage to survive grade school with teeth and without diabetes. 

 

And Easter as well...My granddaughter had more treats and candy in one day than she generally has for cumulative weeks on end. Even the one little Dove chocolate square she generally gets for dessert when they have dinner over at our house is pretty much the only candy she sees in a typical week. She sure does have a sweet tooth, though, evident on those days that she gets to have something extra, like cake if it's someone's birthday.

Those occasional splurges don't seem to do her any harm, though.

[GeeGolly]

For Easter, Halloween, Valentine's Day and even Christmas all rules were relaxed in our house for sweets. On Easter they could eat candy before breakfast. On Christmas I (yep, this heathen) baked a Happy Birthday Jesus cake to de-commercial Christmas a little bit. My kids would have fruit and cake for breakfast.

Izzy having his favorites one day a year is no big deal. Certain cereals were are hard no in our house, Lucky Charms being one of them, but to each their own. It seems Jill is fairly lax with sweets to begin with.

[Tikichick]

6 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Yes I do. For two reasons, I see this IRL, and I have no doubt she wouldn't have mentioned anything if his growth chart projection was for him to be shorter. I have never once heard a parent say with pride, "My kid's in the 10th percentile, he/she is going to be short!".

I have a friend who is quite tall herself and wound up marrying a man who is also incredibly tall.   She would be upset with me if she read that sentence.   Their height is actually how they met, which  I know because they tell people.   She is beyond sensitive if others mention anything about their height, and we are talking merely mention, NOT ribbing, joking, teasing or anything even more negative.   I also have another friend (doesn't even know first friend) who was very anxiously watching the annual physical stats of her youngest son because of some wives' tale info. that supposedly worked out completely accurately about her other kids' heights and she was worried that it predicted her youngest son would barely top 5 feet.   He's probably 6'1" as an adult and ironically shot up over 6" in less than two months during middle school when they had several extended family events and she had to keep replacing his pants every week or two, including two suits.

Long-winded way of saying I'm used to people being unusually fixated on heights.  I did notice Jill's comment in her post, but to me it just felt like surprise and possibly some new news she decided to include to mark his big day, the fact he's "growing up".   I'm not really sure she has the skillset to pull off a humble brag or be particularly stealthy in quite that way.   I think the Duggar method she's used to is more like "hit two by four with hammer".  LOL!

[Tikichick]

27 minutes ago, SMama said:

Sign language worked so well with my kids. My son had a speech delay and was indeed frustrated, acting out. Once the sign language was started his behavior changed significantly. It made speech therapy a breeze.  SGirl came home at 16 months old and had only heard Chinese her short life. We started sign language right after we met. Her first sign was more, and my eyes started leaking profusely. I regret dropping sign language with both. But being bilingual it seemed too much to add a third language. I wish they had that skill now. I can’t see Joy and Austin spending the time to get Gideon evaluated or trying sign language. Although the Little Rock appointment for Evy’s head bump gives me a smidge of hope. BTW, my adult son and SGirl still remember most of the signs. 

Sign language is a very good idea I hadn't even thought about.   I agree I don't see Joy and Austin being very open to the idea or the effort.   I am hopeful they will seek out professional intervention because it will be important that he be able to flourish in his speech and communication with those around him throughout his life.  

[GeeGolly]

8 minutes ago, Tikichick said:

I have a friend who is quite tall herself and wound up marrying a man who is also incredibly tall.   She would be upset with me if she read that sentence.   Their height is actually how they met, which  I know because they tell people.   She is beyond sensitive if others mention anything about their height, and we are talking merely mention, NOT ribbing, joking, teasing or anything even more negative.   I also have another friend (doesn't even know first friend) who was very anxiously watching the annual physical stats of her youngest son because of some wives' tale info. that supposedly worked out completely accurately about her other kids' heights and she was worried that it predicted her youngest son would barely top 5 feet.   He's probably 6'1" as an adult and ironically shot up over 6" in less than two months during middle school when they had several extended family events and she had to keep replacing his pants every week or two, including two suits.

Long-winded way of saying I'm used to people being unusually fixated on heights.  I did notice Jill's comment in her post, but to me it just felt like surprise and possibly some new news she decided to include to mark his big day, the fact he's "growing up".   I'm not really sure she has the skillset to pull off a humble brag or be particularly stealthy in quite that way.   I think the Duggar method she's used to is more like "hit two by four with hammer".  LOL!

And maybe these fixations start in childhood due to societal thoughts on there being a correct or desirable height.

[Tikichick]

7 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

And maybe these fixations start in childhood due to societal thoughts on there being a correct or desirable height.

Well I do know I'd like to not be both short as well as short armed and short legged myself.   I don't think I'm necessarily fixated on it, nor do I let it bother me if someone teases me about it.    

[DangerousMinds]

2 hours ago, SMama said:

Thinking about the Dillard and Seewald kids. Age and upbringing certainly make a difference. Both Derick and Ben were raised with schedules and clean homes. Both ended up under JB’s thumb with no foreseeable way to escape. Ben by need, Derick by choice.

Derick’s discontent with JB regardless of the reason was a saving grace for Jill and the kids. He had the education to move on and a supporting mom. Ben is about to have his fourth kid and is still dependent on JB to support his family.

Ben’s parents sacrificed their first born, still a teen, to have a Duggar connection. IIRC, Derick’s mom allegedly hoped he and Jill could talk alone. You know, like normal dating couples. Someone posted it happened at the airport when Derick returned from Nepal. Although I’m sure Cathy was initially equally happy about the Duggar connection.

Once Derick became disenchanted he had tools and support to make changes. Ben is stuck for life. Both families of origin have horrible beliefs. But Derick grew up with a working mother who became a widow rather young, and attended public school and college. He also has one sibling. To my knowledge Gwinn never worked outside the home and homeschooled her children.

I recall at the beginning of their marriage, pre Izzy, Derick talking about the need for a bedtime since he was working. A foreign concept to Jill and one she didn’t seem to like. 

It took Derick quite a few years but he was able to get his family to have a more structured life. Ben can’t even get his own kids on a freaking schedule. He went from a home where the mom cooked for the family to eating mostly eggs. Or going to the TTH to eat processed food he obviously disliked. 

The Seewald kids are Duggars through and through. It must chap Ben’s hide. His dreams of a Leave it to Beaver life and headship shattered. He’s JB’s slave and Jessa is the headship. I don’t see the Seewald kids ever going to school, Christian (no money) or public (evil).

Seeing the joy on Izzy’s face on the birthday day pictures gives me hope. No super spreader birthday for him at the TTH.  Watching the Seewald kids really saddens me. Even if Izzy and Sam are pitied or shunned they are going to be better off in the end.

Since this all started when Ben was a teen his parents bear a lot of responsibility. Way to screw up your kid and grandkids. I wonder how they feel when they see pictures of their unkempt, asleep wherever with crumbs on their clothes, neglected grandchildren.

I wonder what role if any Cathy played in Jill’s metamorphosis and Izzy going to public school. 

And Bin’s mom has gone batshit crazy on her social media, posting insane anti-vax lies and right wing propaganda.