Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[lianau]

I picked tomorrow. It's time for some water to be breaking!!! They're still newly weds, so I'm sure having some sex to get labor started wouldn't be too much to ask. :)

Are they allowed to have sex for fun ?

[Sew Sumi]

This is either diversion, or Rick James Superfreak Dullard is still waiting to make his first appearance. From Ben's Instagram: 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0jP9IfAJoF/?taken-by=ben_seewald

[truthtalk2014]

OMG, Jill looks like she hasn't slept in a week, and I imagine being well-rested is mighty helpful for labor. Agree with floridamom. When it comes to Jill's birth plan, I hope there's an option that includes an MD and a hospital. When things really start to rock and roll at Casa Dillard, she may end up "re-evaluating" the rose-colored no-drugs, no-doctor scenario.

I sincerely hope she has a hospital nearby.  On my last, I wanted a natural birth (no drugs- although now I don't think it's natural at all- lol)  Was not progressing and had to have pitocin.  Worst pain of my life.  I was using a certified midwife - but in a regular hospital.  Within a few hours, I was threatening to toss the IV pole at the CNM if she did not get me an epidural and quick. 

 

I really wish Jill had this option.  I know she hated the wisdom teeth removal (I think it was her). I don't recall her liking pain so much.  Hoping everything goes well and that she has a safe birth.  Oh, and hoping the snide looks from MEchelle are limited to less than 40.

Edited March 23, 2015 by truthtalk2014

[truthtalk2014]

It would be interesting to know, for sure. Derick probably does watch some games, although certainly fewer than in his bachelor days. But I have to say it wouldn't surprise me at all to find out that "Look how much the Duggar boys are into sports!" is just a tactic on the part of TLC, or maybe even Boob, to make the family appear more mainstream, and the boys, frankly, less weird. If it is, they need to do a whole lot more to even approach "mainstream."

It's really weird to me that none of the children are involved in any team sports - baseball, softball, football, soccer.  Nothing.  I'm sure Jerrick or JBen played some team sport as a child.  I would be shocked to find out they didn't. 

[JoanArc]

They'll have to wheel Mechelle out on a gurney. Not going to be a good day for her.

[truthtalk2014]

This is either diversion, or Rick James Superfreak Dullard is still waiting to make his first appearance. From Ben's Instagram: 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0jP9IfAJoF/?taken-by=ben_seewald

First thing I noticed was those damned paper plates.  Four people and all those wedding gifts and they are still filling up our landfills!  

 

Cracks me up when Jilly Muffin has the nerve to ask about cloth diapers!  Like she would ever use them!  OMG

Edited March 23, 2015 by truthtalk2014

[Lillybee]

So Jill is following family tradition and using paper plates the way they do at Chez Duggar.

[Sew Sumi]

Well, it IS about half and half. I also see real plates mixed in there. Girlfriend has a dishwasher, and geez, it's not as if they're feeding the entire Duggar clan. Although Justin was there; Ben posted a picture in which he looked like Ed Grimley (and I might have said so, LOL). I only see two plates at the table that aren't accounted for, and I figured those were Benessa's. Did Justin even eat, or do kids eat at the island or something?

[truthtalk2014]

Did Justin even eat, or do kids eat at the island or something?

Well first they climb on top of the island with dirty bare feet and then they sit on it and eat.  (on styrofoam plates of course)  

Edited March 23, 2015 by truthtalk2014

[Skittl1321]

Are they allowed to have sex for fun ?

Jim Bob has talked about sex to soften the cervix before.

[StaceyNotStacie]

This is either diversion, or Rick James Superfreak Dullard is still waiting to make his first appearance. From Ben's Instagram: 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0jP9IfAJoF/?taken-by=ben_seewald

 

I noticed there was no Jessa in the picture.  I guess so that there can be no speculation about whether or not she is also expecting.  As for the picture, it's nice to see Jana and Jinger having a nice family dinner, hopefully without the littles (although poor Joy is probably picking up the slack).

[Sew Sumi]

Ben posted that pic of Justin, so we know that at least one Howler was there. I imagine he wasn't the only one. 

 

eta: I wonder if derickdullard is going to work tomorrow, since they are apparently going on with Life As Usual until Muffy goes into labor. I'll be interested to see how much time he takes off work, given that much of their actual income is based on what he earns. Family Leave is unpaid. 

Edited March 23, 2015 by Sew Sumi

[Portia]

Believe me, I am a huge fan of hospital births and epudurals, but I predict that Jill will go the natural, home birth route just fine. Sure she's carrying big, but it still looks to me like she's experiencing a perfectly normal pregnancy that promises to end with a successful birth. Everyone DOES realize that female bodies are designed to open up for the passage of a big old baby head, right? I'm not here to argue the wisdom of home births--personally I'm not terribly comfortable with them--but it amuses me that people keep talking as if childbirth is impossibly dangerous and unendurable.

[truelovekiss]

Ben posted that pic of Justin, so we know that at least one Howler was there. I imagine he wasn't the only one.

eta: I wonder if derickdullard is going to work tomorrow, since they are apparently going on with Life As Usual until Muffy goes into labor. I'll be interested to see how much time he takes off work, given that much of their actual income is based on what he earns. Family Leave is unpaid.

If he goes in to work and Jilly Muffin goes into labor, is she going to have to drive back to Walmart HQ to pick him up? I'm just imagining the scandal if someone like Jinger or Jessa has to get him and be alone in a vehicle with him! Maybe he can get a cab, but request a male driver, lest he be tempted.

Also, in regards to BinSeewald's instagram post, people in my real life are starting to get pretty damn tired of me referring to fellowship all the time. I hate what the Duggars are doing to me.

Edited March 23, 2015 by truelovekiss

[cereality]

It's possible one or more of her sisters is staying with her if she doesn't go into labor tonight and Derick goes to work in the morning; that way he takes the car and can drive back home if labor starts during the day and in case of emergency -- they have Jana there with a car. I imagine Jana will be involved during labor anyway. So maybe they're all on baby watch.

Just got word that a friend's water broke tonight; I know millions of kids around the world are born each day, yet selfishly I'd like for Jill not to deliver Monday so friend's kid isn't sharing a birthday w a Duggar.

[DangerousMinds]

This is either diversion, or Rick James Superfreak Dullard is still waiting to make his first appearance. From Ben's Instagram: 

 

https://instagram.com/p/0jP9IfAJoF/?taken-by=ben_seewald

Dullard. So perfect.

[cmr2014]

 

I'm not here to argue the wisdom of home births--personally I'm not terribly comfortable with them--but it amuses me that people keep talking as if childbirth is impossibly dangerous and unendurable.

 

That's not entirely true. For millennia -- and in many parts of the world even today -- childbirth was (is) extremely dangerous for women. 

 

Right now, the maternal mortality rate in the US is 17 per 100,000 live births, and it has been rising.

 

For a comparison, here are some numbers for women who do/did not have the advantage of modern medical care.

 

In Afghanistan, the rate 1600 per 100,000 live births.

 

In 19th century England, the rate was about 50 per 1000 live births (or 5000 per 100,000 for comparative purposes).

 

Jill is young and appears to be healthy, and it seems likely that given her mother's fertility, she won't have any serious trouble. To suggest, however, that childbirth is no big deal, and that there can't be serious complications that require medical intervention is just not realistic.

[GEML]

But in Western countries where women have prenatal care, using midwives, and little to no pain medication the way we do in the US, their infant and mother mortality rates are equal (and often slightly better) than the US. (Slightly better because we have pockets in the US that still have problems with prenatal care.)

The notion that home births and midwives and lack of pain medications of today are the reasons for the high birth problems of the past are comparing apples to oranges.

Edited March 23, 2015 by GEML

[Wellfleet]

Believe me, I am a huge fan of hospital births and epudurals, but I predict that Jill will go the natural, home birth route just fine. Sure she's carrying big, but it still looks to me like she's experiencing a perfectly normal pregnancy that promises to end with a successful birth. Everyone DOES realize that female bodies are designed to open up for the passage of a big old baby head, right? I'm not here to argue the wisdom of home births--personally I'm not terribly comfortable with them--but it amuses me that people keep talking as if childbirth is impossibly dangerous and unendurable.

 

Personally I have nothing against home birth. It's been successfully done that way for centuries and I say "live and let live, good luck and God bless." I could even see myself possibly going that route. But it would never in a million years be for my first baby, and probably not my second. I would want to be sure I had everything medical science could offer the first few times at least. Long ago my mom told me when she started having her babies, in the mid 50s, natural childbirth was just beginning to be talked about and practiced. Nothing like it is now, but it was catching on. When pregnant for the first time [with me], her doctor, a very wise old duffer who'd delivered 1000s of babies, told her that if she wanted natural childbirth, she would need to find another doctor, because it was always possible, despite how wonderfully a pregnancy had progressed, for something to go very wrong very quickly, and that being in a hospital gave everyone the best chance for good results all the way around. I've never forgotten that. Mom actually found out how right her doctor had been with her second baby, my little brother. I don't remember what occurred but he had to be delivered very quickly and Mom called him a "high forceps baby." Anyway, I know I'd never be able to forgive myself if something happened and just being in a hospital could have prevented or corrected it. It's totally possible to do natural childbirth in a hospital, never needing any of their nice shiny equipment. But hey, Jilly Muffin is 20-whatever, and when you're in your 20s, you don't yet know what you don't know. When I was in mine, I thought I had EVERYTHING figured out. Took 20-30 years to find out that - sonofagun - I didn't. Still don't either, but I have at least learned that I don't know a fraction of what I thought I did.

Edited March 23, 2015 by Wellfleet

[Betweenyouandme]

I just hope Jill and the baby are healthy after/during labor. I mean, I'm definitely going to the hospital in 6 months with my baby, but it's no matter to me what Jill does as long as it's legal and what she's choosing...as far as her birthing plan/labor go. I admit I'll likely cry if something horrible happens. But, I don't think it will...not anymore than any other birth. Just my opinion.

[Micks Picks]

Wellfleet, I love your post.  PBS has run a series called Call the Midwife and it was very good.  It was set in London in the 50s.  That's when my mom had her kids and it often scares me.  My sister was a forceps delivery; I told people at the time she was tooled out.  Well, I was just a kid.  Many of the woman on the show ended up at birthing centers or in hospital.  From what I know now, most hospitals have birthing rooms where the whole family can come and participate in delivery.  In fact, that been the case for 25 years, I'd guess.  A friend's husband was going to go out and have a cigarette and oh my, what she called him wouldn't bear repeating!  Another friend had a daughter cut the cord of her new son; I wouldn't want to be there.  My best friend called nurses so many names during her delivery that you'd think it was all their fault.  Childbirth with my friends never endeared the idea to me.

[NikSac]

Random thought... but I bought a salmon steak tonight and was also buying lemon and dill to go with it. I completely cracked up in the grocery store when I turned around with Dill in my hand and some guy who looked a LOT like Derick happened to be standing there. I think the only lesson learned was I've watched too much 19 Kids, but it was pretty funny.

[floridamom]

I get the feeling that this family seems to have the opinion that the birthing mothers are in charge of the situation...from Anna's casual style of delivering at home, a midwife being one hours drive away, and Jill's preference of being at home with NO medical care available...I believe that they should realize that THEY are NOT in charge of the labor and delivery, but their bodies are and the baby "is in charge". They can't control the labor and delivery experience at all...things will go the way they will go and the birthing mothers need to realize that. It is a risk they take to be delivering on their own away from facilities with medical care.Also, I would want a pediatrician to immediately evaluate my baby on the spot....I think waiting days or a week before that baby is seen by IT'S doctor is not wise...Conditions that are not seen by the naked eye can be present and that baby needs to be checked out asap. In summation here, folks, I think the Duggars take childbirth waaaay too casually and think they are in charge of the progress and experience...they are NOT.

[Portia]

I think pretty much everyone is making great points. The only idea I reject is that it's "obvious" this will be a difficult delivery because Jill is petite and her husband is tall. Tiny women can and do safely deliver good-sized babies all the time.

[Fuzzysox]

Here we go again another week of Baby Dilly watch. Now I'm thinking April 1st. 

[GEML]

Well, while it is true that a labor and birth can't completely be controlled, they can be somewhat, and to the extent that they are, a woman with a midwife doing a home birth can do so exactly as much as a woman in a hospital with an epidural and an OB/GYN.

[Barb23]

I think waiting days or a week before that baby is seen by IT'S doctor is not wise...Conditions that are not seen by the naked eye can be present and that baby needs to be checked out asap. In summation here, folks, I think the Duggars take childbirth waaaay too casually and think they are in charge of the progress and experience...they are NOT.

Last year I got hooked on sites that had stories of home births that went wrong. I think it was the Smuggars attitude that nothing can go wrong at home births that piqued my interest in this topic. There were some that the babies who were deemed normal & Ok after birth, died hours later. Granted this could happen in a hospital but unlikely since they are checked out by a pediatrician or house doctor after birth. When I worked for a pediatrician there was a birthing center that referred newborn babies to us. Our pediatricians had to sign a paper ahead of time that we would see the baby in the office within 24 hours of birth which is a great policy. I don't want to put a gray cloud over the impending birth of the Duggar/Dillard Messiah & am hoping all goes well but just wanted to say things can go horribly wrong.

[3girlsforus]

Actually my experience is that people assume nothing can go wrong in a hospital and that people who have home births don't have medically trained or experienced people caring for them. Not close to true. 

[Literata]

 

I get the feeling that this family seems to have the opinion that the birthing mothers are in charge of the situation...from Anna's casual style of delivering at home, a midwife being one hours drive away, and Jill's preference of being at home with NO medical care available...I believe that they should realize that THEY are NOT in charge of the labor and delivery, but their bodies are and the baby "is in charge".

Word. So much word. 

 

As a pseudo-midwife-in-training, Jill has to be -- one would think -- aware of instances in which things haven't gone as planned. But I wonder if, to her, all that indicates is that those mothers didn't pray hard enough.

[Fuzzysox]

Wasn't Jill assisting in a home birth when an ambulance had to be called or I'm I imaging it?

 

I sure hope she isn't propped on the couch after the birth with the baby in her arms, Derrick next to her and the whole clan gushing about the latest Duggar errrr I mean Dillard addition. 

[GEML]

Again, I could have checked myself out of the hospital an hour or two after giving birth. And I doubt things go that much badly for home births than hospitals. The main reason, again, babies don't thrive after birth, has to do with lack of prenatal care. And that is NOT an issue for the Duggars.

[Hpmec]

Barb23 and Floridamom bring up an interesting point. All the emphasis on a home birth seems to be on the mother and how she'll fare. Very little talk of the baby's health. I assume Baby Dilly will be strong and healthy. However, what if he isn't? I have a friend whose baby was born with a congenital heart defect requiring immediate attention. Within an hour of birth he was transferred to a children's hospital and had the first of many surgeries that night. Had he been born at home without a doctor present, I hate to think about the outcome.

I anticipated a routine birth with my one and only and ended up having an emergency c-section. Very glad I was in the hospital because childbirth is unpredictable.

Better to be safe than sorry, especially the first time around.

Edited March 23, 2015 by Hpmec

[truelovekiss]

Wasn't Jill assisting in a home birth when an ambulance had to be called or I'm I imaging it?

I sure hope she isn't propped on the couch after the birth with the baby in her arms, Derrick next to her and the whole clan gushing about the latest Duggar errrr I mean Dillard addition.

Yes, I think there was something wrong with the umbilical cord? I remember there being a huge lump in it, which looked really scary to me, but I really don't know much about this type of thing.

Ugh the idea of giving birth (sans drugs) and then have J'chelle and Boob and legions if howlers and lost girls pawing all over me and my baby mere minutes later sounds like it's own special type of horrible. And I'll bet anything Boob is going to ask for a meal while he's there.

[BitterApple]

I hope Jill doesn't have the entire family over shortly after giving birth. God only knows what that poor baby could catch from all those germy kids. Josie would probably sneeze all over it.

[StaceyNotStacie]

Here we go again another week of Baby Dilly watch. Now I'm thinking April 1st. 

 

Next Sunday (3/29) is Palm Sunday and 4/5 is Easter Sunday.  Maybe Baby Dilly is trying to time his arrival with Holy Week or Easter.

[Fuzzysox]

Yessssssss *insert Prissy's voice* I change the date to Palm Sunday. A holy Baby Dilly must be born on a holy Catholic day!

[msblossom]

I am imagining Jill's house to be Grand Central Station. I'm envisioning the house to be full of 10 Duggars camping out at Jill's house with sleeping bags, bags of groceries, toys, etc. Jill is so used to having everything with her family present that she might actually get her feelings hurt if they don't make a big family production of it with as many Duggars possible. I'm not sure how comfortable Cathy would be with it -- my guess, not very. She'll probably limit her time over there and show up when Derick requests it.

[JoanArc]

She'll need bleachers to accommodate the family around the birthing pool.

[MargeGunderson]

Have any of the Duggar women said why they want a home birth? Or why they choose to forgo drugs during the process? Historically there has been a biblical interpretation that childbirth is one of woman's punishments from God for Eve eating the apple in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3:16).  I'm curious about if this is part of their reasons.

[Skittl1321]

Yessssssss *insert Prissy's voice* I change the date to Palm Sunday. A holy Baby Dilly must be born on a holy Catholic day!

Palm Sunday is important to many Christian denominations.

[andromeda331]

I don't think its that people think nothing can go wrong in a hospital. But its if anything goes wrong there's a whole team doctors and nurses who can do something if something goes wrong. Where at a home birth if things go wrong the minutes there isn't a whole team of doctors and nurses if things go wrong. I'd go that route but that's because I know too many people who the pregnancy went smoothly and things went very wrong in childbirth.  I could be wrong but I think the reason the Duggars go this route is its cheaper then a hospital. These are the same people take their kid to a pawn shop to pick out a birthday present, who comp everything, there's no way their going to a hospital unless they absolutely have too. 

[msblossom]

Have any of the Duggar women said why they want a home birth? Or why they choose to forgo drugs during the process? Historically there has been a biblical interpretation that childbirth is one of woman's punishments from God for Eve eating the apple in the Garden of Eden (Genesis 3:16).  I'm curious about if this is part of their reasons.

I assumed most folks involved in churches like the Duggar's do it bc they lack proper medical insurance and most are poor and cannot afford a hospital birth and extras like pain medication. And bc those families have had good results with home births, they continue the trend bc of economics and relative safety to the mother and baby.

[farmgal4]

Barb23 and Floridamom bring up an interesting point. All the emphasis on a home birth seems to be on the mother and how she'll fare. Very little talk of the baby's health. I assume Baby Dilly will be strong and healthy. However, what if he isn't? I have a friend whose baby was born with a congenital heart defect requiring immediate attention. Within an hour of birth he was transferred to a children's hospital and had the first of many surgeries that night. Had he been born at home without a doctor present, I hate to think about the outcome.

I anticipated a routine birth with my one and only and ended up having an emergency c-section. Very glad I was in the hospital because childbirth is unpredictable.

Better to be safe than sorry, especially the first time around.

I know it's to each his own, but IMO it's absolutely crazy to have a baby at home. There are way too many things that could go wrong in a split second. When I worked L&D I've seen babies heartbeats drop in a split second and we were running down the hall with the hospital bed and mother trying to get her to surgery before brain damage occurred. I just really cannot fathom why anybody would want to risk it at home. It just seems crazy to me.

[Spencer Hastings]

I don't have children so my ignorance is probably showing, but everyone keeps saying that a home birth for the first is a bad idea because of what might go wrong, but could be okay for the third or fourth. What's the difference? Couldn't a third or fourth baby have the same potential problems as a first baby? This argument isn't holding up for me. Either way, I'm sure that Jill is fully aware of the potential risks and that there's probably a backup plan in place. She doesn't strike me as the reckless type. Both she and Derick strike me as type A people. I think they've got this.

[truthtalk2014]

Ugh the idea of giving birth (sans drugs) and then have J'chelle and Boob and legions if howlers and lost girls pawing all over me and my baby mere minutes later sounds like it's own special type of horrible. And I'll bet anything Boob is going to ask for a meal while he's there.

That is definitely the stuff nightmares are made of.  I can see Jim Boob eating a double whopper with extra onions in the labor and delivery room.  Okay, no sleep tonight.  

[SopranoKris]

I don't have children so my ignorance is probably showing, but everyone keeps saying that a home birth for the first is a bad idea because of what might go wrong, but could be okay for the third or fourth. What's the difference? Couldn't a third or fourth baby have the same potential problems as a first baby? This argument isn't holding up for me. Either way, I'm sure that Jill is fully aware of the potential risks and that there's probably a backup plan in place. She doesn't strike me as the reckless type. Both she and Derick strike me as type A people. I think they've got this.

 

There's always the potential for something to go wrong.  However, in a first time mother, we don't know how she'll tolerate labor & delivery.  What if labor stalls?  What if she has immense back labor and the pain is too much? What if the baby has cord compression?  Heart decelerations?  What if they needed an emergency c-section?  How far away is the nearest hospital?  Do they have a NICU?  I'd be very worried about having a first baby at home.

 

At least a woman who has been through childbirth with no prior complications has a lower risk of future complications.  However, there will never be zero risk in any birth.  I get the impression that Jill thinks her experience being a midwife apprentice and attending her mother's births somehow means that she knows exactly what to expect.  It's NEVER what you expect it to be :)

[lianau]

Jim Bob has talked about sex to soften the cervix before.

They all like to over share. 

[Wellfleet]

Yessssssss *insert Prissy's voice* I change the date to Palm Sunday. A holy Baby Dilly must be born on a holy Catholic day!

 

Yes - the 29th! That's my day in the pool!

[JoanArc]

I noticed they totally (!) edited scenes of Jill's midwife training this season. She was shown with a stethoscope around her neck, talking about increased responsibility and 'making more decisions', etc. All done to make it look like she's more knowledgeable/experienced than she is. Attending births is fine and dandy, but she's got no certification and hasn't flown solo. It was edited to make her look like some kind of L&D student nurse, weeks away from graduation. Uh, no, misrepresentation for the cameras, like, totally!

 

If the baby comes one Easter can they name it Judas? A J-name that's not taken!

 

I just realized the birthing pool will need a splash zone for the first 2 rows, like Sea World.

Edited March 23, 2015 by JoanArc

[Barb23]

She'll need bleachers to accommodate the family around the birthing pool.

You win the post of the day. I'm still laughing.

  

I know it's to each his own, but IMO it's absolutely crazy to have a baby at home. There are way too many things that could go wrong in a split second. When I worked L&D I've seen babies heartbeats drop in a split second and we were running down the hall with the hospital bed and mother trying to get her to surgery before brain damage occurred. I just really cannot fathom why anybody would want to risk it at home. It just seems crazy to me.

As I've posted before, I could have been that mom. Thankfully because of quick intervention, my son's birth turned out well.

On another note, I missed getting in the baby pool for Jill but I'm sure I won't have to wait long to get in another.