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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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That’s not a messy house, that’s a dirty house. Gross. I’ve got 4 boys (#boymom HA!) so I know both dirty and messy.  

I can give her the dusty table because I might not notice that unless I moved something but to not walk 10+ diapers to the garbage can or not have a garbage can in their changing area - dirty and unhygienic. The sheets don’t look like spit up, it looks like what sheets look like if you don’t change them for a couple of months. And the roaches that must live that kitchen!!!  

This must be a joke post. It has to be. She’s trolling everyone.  What is her point?  

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25 minutes ago, bythelake said:

What is the purpose of these pictures? Are we supposed to feel sorry for her because she doesn't have time to clean? Should we commend her for being a such an involved mother? I call BS because Henry still must sleep several hours during the day, and Spurge must still nap. What's stopping her from doing chores  then? And where's her headship?  Dirty diapers on a dresser and filthy sheets only show that they are slobs, and immature, ignorant ones as well. 

I think this is a clear failed attempt at a folksy "wal shucks, we're all jes' plain ole folkses like you and your'n.  See how relatable we all are?"

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I hands up admit I have a liveable  house not a showroom house, but WHY the dirty nappies ?

Why wouldn’t you change the nappy and put it in the bin before you washed your hands ?

I doubt I could sleep on those sheets

And I do wipe my stove top 

Clean not yet dealt with washing goes in baskets here,it’s a tiny bit more civilised 

Edited by Totally
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The diapers and the sheets gross me out. She only has 2 children. She can stand in the middle of her house and practically touch every wall. She can practically toss the diapers into the kitchen trash from the bedroom. And if that's where she changes diapers, put a diaper pail or a waste basket in there. 12 diapers? That's like two days worth of diapers, ew. The sink full of dishes and the scattered toys I get after a long day. But she is a stay at home parent with a husband, her kids still nap, and whatever Ben's 'job/school' is he must at least be free on weekends.

If Jessa thinks that her house is the norm for two parents of two kids under two, I can only imagine what her homes looked like when she was growing up.

Like @Mojitogirl said, there's a huge difference between messy and dirty. I was repulsed when Jessa asked Joy to clean the snot off her couch, and thought WTF, how many people actually have a couch with boogers all over it. These pictures put it in perspective.

Note to Jessa: If you think these pics make you "just a family on TV", you missed the mark. It makes you appear as lazy slob who can't manage two children and a tiny home. 

And how do they possibly have a "guest bed" when they live in a tiny two bedroom home and have two kids?

Edited by GeeGolly
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They'll have to get rid of that guest bed if Jessa is knocked up again (and I think she is). Note no pictures of her since Joe's after party, and even then her face was looking fuller again after she'd lost all the Henry baby weight.

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Jessa's house has surpassed dirty..it's disgusting and unhealthy. Why are they 'breathing the air' filled with dirty diapers ON THEIR FURNITURE in their bedroom? Who does that? Her house surely smells like shit. Please excuse the language. When a soiled diaper is sitting out there for 2 days due to laziness, it becomes shit. I guess Jessa is spending too much time on her ultra long hair and makeup every day. It is JESSA who needs the reality check. She does have a small house, so it's easy to keep up with. I had two boys also, was a stay at home mother at that time, and my house was NEVER unkempt like that. We also had fresh homemade dinners every night....Doesn't she have a dishwasher? She should use it. One room a day ...that's what it will take to clean up that disgusting mess. She can do it, she just doesn't WANT to do it.

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They have a dishwasher. I don't, so I am ignorant about what survives in there. I thought rigid plastic was okay? There's a lot of plastic in their sink. Adults' utensils can go in the dishwasher (unless it's broken, and with these two you gotta wonder), but that's a shit ton of bowls for a toddler and baby barely into solid foods for one day. Hint to Jessa, REWASH THE BOWL during the day. Or, as the earlier IG post illustrated, use no plates or bowls at all. 

How often does she wipe off that table? Bad choice, not being smooth, but they like their dark, "rustic" woods of dubious origin. Jessa should know that in a small house, you have to go light. Dark walls? I guess for filming in the living room okay, but lighten up the furniture a bit, They've also shoved the coffee table next to the front door, moved the dining table to the right, taking out some storage cabinet they had, and added a tiny kitchen island that is odd since she rarely cooks. I think her specialty is fruit salad. 

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Love how she made a list. There's messy, in need of organization, I get that. The kitchen and dirty diapers are just not right. Sure Jessa, time with the children is important, but so is their health. Give Spurgeon a kid size brooom, and clean the stove, while he helps. I am so glad she didn't post a picture of the bathroom. The filter can be cleaned with a swifter duster, tag the company. Geez.

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Also, poor Ben. Isn't he a germophobe as Jessa described him? I think that maybe he isn't...He's just used to a neater, cleaner home. His mother's house looked quite nice and tidy.

I think some of the problems with Jessa are that she never learned TIME MANAGEMENT from her parents who live on "Duggar Time"...no skills whatsoever as a homemaker for Jessa. She's also most likely spending waaaayyy too much time during the week at her parents' house passing off her children to her sisters and 'sitting around' bullshitting. Once again,, please excuse the language. It's not like me, but it's the plain and simple truth about this situation as I see it. I loo forward in reading all of your astute observations and great opinions here. Keep them coming.

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If Ben is an allergic germophobe he is certainly able to dust.  And with not throwing away soiled diapers, I'm beginning to wonder about Jessa's state of mind.  There's a lot of thought about Jill being mentally fragile but maybe Jessa is suffering from depression.  She could have untreated PPD.  And like floridamom  wrote she hasn't had any good example of how to manage time or take care of a home.   I'm not surprised that their home, cause this is Ben's mess too, is in this condition.  I'm just fascinated by posting pictures of it.   

Edited by wilsie
I need to add "wrote" after floridamom so it didn't look like I thought she didn't have any good examples either. Sorry floridamom.
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I'm not manic about cleaning my stovetop...sometimes a week or so goes by between good scrubdowns . But it generally looks at least as bad as Jessa's by then. I've had it look that bad after a single dinner. And she says it's been a couple of months...how often does she actually cook??

And I had three  kids under 6 years old back in the day as well...never was a born housekeeper, but my house never had ALL those undone things going on at the same time. And if it had, I'd sure as heck never post pictures on (nonexistent, back then anyway) social media.

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The crazy thing is Jessa’s message could have been achieved by just posting the picture of baby toys.  Who cares if a family of four has some kid toys scattered around? I have family and friends who will follow their kids around with a vacuum basically and every night completely rid the house of their existence.  They are obsessed with portraying the perfect life on SM.  So I can understand the sentiment.  Even the laundry would have been passable.

But the table, the DIAPERS, and the kitchen?  Not to mention the sheets.  I wonder what cry for help this is supposed to be.  Jim Bob opening the wallet for a maid?

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3 hours ago, floridamom said:

I think some of the problems with Jessa are that she never learned TIME MANAGEMENT from her parents who live on "Duggar Time"...no skills whatsoever as a homemaker for Jessa. She's also most likely spending waaaayyy too much time during the week at her parents' house passing off her children to her sisters and 'sitting around' bullshitting. Once again,, please excuse the language. It's not like me, but it's the plain and simple truth about this situation as I see it. I loo forward in reading all of your astute observations and great opinions here. Keep them coming.

She only had her "jurisdiction" so maybe that little area of her house is clean.  

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12 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

She could have probably folded half of the clothes on that bed in the time it took for her to construct that post. 

But then she would be neglecting all of us little people out here depending on her posts!

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My house needs dusting now, and I'm a lazy retiree.  But when I was a young mother I had a much cleaner house--I had a lot more energy and I wanted a clean house for my children.  I just can't fathom the diaper thing.  My daughter has a can in the garage for the diapers--you just open the door and toss it in.

Jessa is going to have that breakdown when she has four children and no time to mess with her banana curls.  Spurgie and Henry won't be taking care of their younger siblings--they will be wrestling on the floor while the other two babies scream for attention.  Wake up, Jessa!

eta:  I'm going to give just as much credit to Ben for the pig sty they are living in.  Why isn't he doing dishes while Jessa breastfeeds Henry?  Why isn't he folding clothes or taking out the dirty diapers? His mother is going to crap when she sees these pictures.

Edited by riverblue22
punctuation
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*sigh* My house isn't what it should be on the clean level - but my heavens, when the Mini Malotte was wearing diapers there were no dirty diapers laying about.  When she walked at nine months and even prior when she was crawling any surface she could reach was clean.  I get the unfolded clothes and dirty dishes but geez - the time to pick up and clean is when they are napping or laundry at night when they go to bed.  

She really is fishing - she's posted dirty home photos, but yet pontificates about how wonderful a mother she is because she spends more time with her kids.  Uhhhh really?  My child was sung to, read to, played with as well, and I still managed to tidy up.  She's probably thinking of taking Meeeechelle's MOTY award.  Nope, no special snowflake here dear, you are like hundreds of thousands of other women - and dearie, there's women that work and still don't have that pile of diapers.  

Gawd, somebody cue up How Clean Is Your House? for her on YT please.

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To me this is proof of her damaging upbringing.  Having a lazy ass mother who did nothing but reproduce, nurse, and film a TV show combined with the buddy system and jurisdictions didn't teach any of the Duggar kids how to prioritize or develop coping skills.

I can't decide if Jessa is just overwhelmed and can't figure out for herself throwing out dirty diapers and wiping down her stove take precedence over folding laundry so she just does nothing, or if she thinks she's Michelle Jr.  and doesn't have to do anything because she's nursing her "buddy" Henry.  Either way I think she's confused and it's sad.

There's nothing preventing Ben from stepping up.  How does he stand it?

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I think most of us learned to keep house by watching our moms. It's not rocket science to dust a table, fold clothes and clean a stove, especially with all the products around these days to make our lives easier. Geez, even my grandson ( frosh in college) asked me to pick up a Swiffer for him as his  dorm room floor was getting dirty. 

Michelle obviously did nothing to teach her girls personal cleanliness or how to manage a household. We've seen them show up at their own weddings with filthy feet, They sleep in their clothes on bare mattresses and Josie is allowed to lick everything.(Ugh, I get sick even typing that). If Jessa and Bin worked, sure they'd get a pass,  but these two lazy slugs can't even dispose of dirty diapers properly. Hell, Bin could walk them over to their personal landfill! It's beyond disgusting and if I were the weekend guest, I'd be running for the hills. 

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The diapers thing is SOOOO gross. The bed and the dust are pretty icky, too, but not as bad IMO..... But the diapers....seriously, that has to be like a sign of mental illness or something, right? Not throwing away a couple of days' worth of diapers and just having them sit out?  EWWWW. I have a two year old and one year old (and they keep me busy) and I always throw their dirty diapers away as soon as I change them (on my way to wash my hands). I'm kind of concerned that something is wrong with Jessa (and Ben).....

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I'm one of those people who's good about keeping the kitchen and bathroom clean (because, ew) but am shit when it comes to things like dusting and general organization, so I was all ready to defend Jessa a bit, but...the diapers. WTF? How do diapers not immediately end up in the trash. Who just piles them up that way? WHY?!

Edited by lascuba
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If nothing else, those pictures prove that Jessa does NOT make use of her sisters in her home. So she's lazy, but not entitled lazy.

My atheist praying that she never has a daughter just tripled in intensity.

14 hours ago, Marshmallow Mollie said:

Wow, what a marketing failure. She could have posted one picture and kept the same message of prioritizing the little moments with little kids. I do not understand why she posted 10.

What's the long game here? There's the Honest Toddler author and Scary Mommy blog who have made their brands on imperfect parenting, but Jessa doesn't seem to be going down that road. On the flip side, there is a whole slew of "homekeeping" websites, my favorite of which being Clean Mama, and Jessa has just burned any bridge to that road with this post.

Oh honey, oh sweetie, no.

I have two young kids, and my house is disgusting, but all diapers are in the trash, and I change my sheets weekly. Sleeping in spit up is beyond disgusting .

I think that post was an attempt to go down that road. She's just so, so bad at subtlety and understanding why certain gimmicks connect with the public that whenever she tries to capitalize on being "normal," she fails.

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2 hours ago, Normades said:

I think Jessa really doesn't know any better.  She was brought up by lazy filthy parents and she thinks that's the norm.  I believe she called Ben a germophobe because he actually expected to live in a reasonably clean space.  She would be shocked if she ever dealt with a real germophobe.  Part of me feels bad for Ben because I think he would like to live a more ordered lifestyle, but of course he bows to his headship :), but part of me thinks Ben should get up and show his wife how to clean and manage their household and he should help out, too.  Of course, that would never ever happen.  I imagine Jeremy is doing lots of teaching with Jinger on how to clean, etc.  Excellent job done by Mechelle preparing those girls to be awesome homemakers!!  I wonder what Ben's mother thinks.  I would be livid if my son and grandchildren were living in that filth!!

This. I keep thinking back to the Alice posts (re-pasted in 1 of these threads recently). Alice said that MEchelle hadn't cleaned the house, cooked a meal or bathed the kids herself in YEARS. And this was way back around the time of the 1st Duggar special. Jessa appears to be aping her mom to a T except there are no daughters/sistermoms to pick up the slack.

God, I hope none of these duggar girls ever have a daughter!

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I don't get the pile of diapers either. Why aren't they in the trash? That was an odd photo. The rest I just saw as before and after house cleaning: dusting, doing the laundry, changing the sheets, but the diaper thing has me confused too. 

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On 10/13/2017 at 3:27 PM, xwordfanatik said:

I have never seen The Omen, or even The Exorcist (I thought they'd be too scary) but I do remember in Rosemary's Baby, the witches named the baby Adrien.

Weird how some names get a bad connotation.  The name Spurgeon though, has to be a oner as a first name.  I refer to him as S. Elliot.

You really ought to.  They are SOOOOO good!  Rosemary's Baby is one of my all time favs.  I much prefer older scary movies to new ones.  Less graphic.  Still a little icky sometimes but NOTHING like the newer ones.  

I am not much of a kid person but Spurgie is pretty cute.  It is sad to me that when he grows up he is bound to be another barely literate Duggar fundy misogynist.  

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37 minutes ago, lascuba said:

I'm one of those people who's good about keeping the kitchen and bathroom clean (because, ew) but am shit when it comes to things like dusting and general organization, so I was all ready to defend Jessa a bit...the diapers. WTF? How do diapers not immediately end up in the trash. Who just piles them up that way? WHY?!

Piles them up that way. And, instead of grabbing a trash bag or some kind of other, you know, dirty-diaper container to dispose of them, spends her time making a social-media post about the pile of what looks to be, oh, a couple of days' worth. 

Normally, they all just look stupid to me. And of course this is damn stupid. But this is one of those things that seems to add a layer of insanity to the stupidity.

I can only assume that the post is intended to be some kind of publicity action for her "fans." But in what warped universe would you expect fans of a "modest fashion expert" and "Joanna Gaines-chasing would-be lifestyle maven" to see that post and not think that the poster had lost her damn mind?

Is she getting comments? ... Unfortunately they're probably full of empathy for the plight of the young hard-working mother, I suppose. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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15 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Someone needs to ask her what Ben does all day. He can take a break from internet school for half an hour and fold some clothes while Jessa engages the kids in "imaginiative play" or "cuddles." Or diaper disposal. 

Or maybe she could put down the phone/camera and do a quick clean around. It shows the girls were not taught housekeeping skills. I waited until my nephews were napping to clean. I've known some people to put the kids to bed ( at a reasonable time) and then clean. There is no reason for the diapers on the dresser.

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Just now, Catlyn said:

There is no reason for the diapers on the dresser.

Yes. That is ultra-disgusting!!!  Do they not mind the smell??  Also, do they not think about cleanliness as it relates to health??  That is simply not healthy for her, or her family.  It just screams LAZY to me.  If she's so "busy" and I have no idea what she is busy doing, couldn't she hire someone to come in once in a while to clean up a little?  Those sheets will give me nightmares, too.  I'm really fussy about sheets and those were horrible!!  I think she must smell bad if that's the way she keeps her bedding. 

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27 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

Is she getting comments? ... Unfortunately they're probably full of empathy for the plight of the young hard-working mother, I suppose. 

Most of the comments were sympathetic leghumpers because she blocked everyone else. It's actually disgusting people think this is acceptable in a household where neither parent works.

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1 hour ago, BitterApple said:

That house is absolutely disgusting. That's way beyond normal "kid clutter" of a few toys scattered about and a basket of laundry that needs to be folded. Piles of dirty diapers sitting on a table and black dust clogging up the air vents? Nasty, nasty, nasty.

Jessa doesn't work. Her husband doesn't work. They live in a free house and easily make six figures off TLC. They have no excuses whatsoever. Hire a housekeeper if you hate to clean. Or drop the boys off at the TTH for the day while you and your man-child husband tackle the chores. It's a 900 sq. ft. house, not a 12 bedroom estate. With two adults pitching in, cleaning it top to bottom shouldn't take that long.

Jessa and Bin need to spend $100 (if they weren't such slobs maybe it would cost less) every two weeks and have someone come clean the damn house if they cannot do it themselves.  FFS.  That place is gross.  If one can live in THAT much filth how often do they bathe themselves?  Cause it seems futile to bath AND live in that shit hole.  Also Ben  has arms and legs and could clean himself but they all signed up for this patriarchal type of life so Jessa really needs to get it done, hire someone, or get Ben to help.  He does suffer from terrible allergies and maybe doing more than biannual dusting could help.  Think of the dust mites and all sort of creepy crawlies they must be living with as well as roach resin (cause you know they are all over that place getting fat and sassy on all the ick laying around).  Seriously that bed is VILE. Maybe she doesn't care because she makes Ben sleep in that spot.   Perhaps fundie royalty isn't interested in a Duggar because they STINK!  Being a virgo, I get it.  You cannot gloat about your superior way of life when:  Your brother is a molester, your mother is so zoned out on mommy's little helpers she may not know what year it is,  your father is a crazy hoarder (which is not by the way frugal), you cannot cook and you cannot clean.  All you seem to do well is curl your hair (or lose it once you hit 20 if you are a dude) and get pregnant.  

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10 minutes ago, Lunera said:

Most of the comments were sympathetic leghumpers because she blocked everyone else. It's actually disgusting people think this is acceptable in a household where neither parent works.

Okay, I'm glad to hear everyone who criticized her got deleted or blocked because I was truly frightened to think the majority of people commenting chalked up shitty diapers laying on a dresser to #momlife and #makingmemories. 

Edited by BitterApple
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9 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

Okay, I'm glad to hear everyone who criticized her got deleted or blocked because I was truly frightened to think the majority of people commenting chalked up shitty diapers laying on a dresser to #momlife and #makingmemories. 

Well, to be fair, living with large piles of dirty diapers lying out on dresser tops for days would probably make some memories. 

Edited by Churchhoney
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