Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[GeeGolly]

No baby yet? Less than 11 hours left to have a Halloween baby.

[BradandJanet]

I'm officially declaring I hate every selfie Jessa takes. I try to avoid them, but the girl gets around the 'net. It must take her hours to choose the right tight top to wear, trowel on all that makeup, find a clean mirror to pose in front of, adjust the lightening, practice poses and lip puckers, take a hundred photos, edit and delete photos, and then put them on social media. Whew. It's a good thing she doesn't have a job.

 

Now, one might think she won't have time for all this narcissistic indulgence when Baby Sea World appears, but I'll bet a strong drink, she won't skip a beat.

 

[JoanArc]

 

Now, one might think she won't have time for all this narcissistic indulgence when Baby Sea World appears, but I'll bet a strong drink, she won't skip a beat.

Pft, we'll get twice as many.

[Oldernowiser]

 Ben delivering a baby on his own would be tricky.

Ben delivering a PIZZA on his own would be tricky.

[Defrauder]

When Jessa's baby is born who wants to talk about how cute Jill's baby is?

[Temperance]

In the picture of Jordyn, she looks like she's wearing pajamas. Considering that her parents made a deal with the film crew that their children never be filmed in pajamas, maybe the reason is their pajamas include pants. 

The pineapple looks small to me. 

I guessed this before, but my random guess is that the baby will born on Jessa's birthday. 

[Tabbygirl521]

I giggled at the comments under the pineapple pic. Someone suggested sex to trigger labor. The next commenter said she had tried that once but it left her tongue raw. Took me a minute to realize she was talking about eating a pineapple. I hope.

Edited October 31, 2015 by Tabbygirl521

[Mollie]

I'm officially declaring I hate every selfie Jessa takes. I try to avoid them, but the girl gets around the 'net. It must take her hours to choose the right tight top to wear, trowel on all that makeup, find a clean mirror to pose in front of, adjust the lightening, practice poses and lip puckers, take a hundred photos, edit and delete photos, and then put them on social media. Whew. It's a good thing she doesn't have a job.

 

Now, one might think she won't have time for all this narcissistic indulgence when Baby Sea World appears, but I'll bet a strong drink, she won't skip a beat.

Why does she have to take pictures of herself?  Is Ben never home to take a picture of his wife?

Edited October 31, 2015 by Mollie

[bigskygirl]

He is out cleaning toilets for JB. Okay, I will step away from the thread.

[Kiss my mutt]

I'm sure Jessa will continue with the selfies to show off how fast she regains her figure.

I wonder if Ben's dad is sensitive to the fact that his son is a laughingstock. Nothing really to recommend him or show that he is indeed a man other than impregnanting Jessa. Which is just biology anyway.

Edited October 31, 2015 by Kiss my mutt

[MrsMommy]

No seed of chuckie yet?? Bummer

[ChocolateAddict]

I don't think that Jessa actually wants Baby Bam Bam to be born on the 1st.  She is pretty terrible at sharing and I can't imagine that she wants to share her special, neat, precious anniversary with a rugrat who would take the focus away from her.  

[Featherhat]

Oh I think she knows. And it's there on purpose because she's a minx.

 

themarriagebed.com enlightened me on how "generous" the Christian wife is taught to be.

That site is insane. On one hand its good there's a place for conservative/fundie Christians can get some advice on sex and first times etc, but the shear number of people who claim to have had to crank open their new wife's genitals with medical equipment freaked me out first time I went there. That and the fact that a lot of the explicit "advice" seemed to be a way TMI outlet for not being able to read any steamy novels or porn scenarios in many threads.

[sometimesy]

Is 6 here yet?

[kokapetl]

There's also more room, so less chance of having a toilet birth.

But plenty of toilets if she's so inclined.

[JoanArc]

But plenty of toilets if she's so inclined.

Ben can sit on the side by side toilets.

[kokapetl]

In the picture of Jordyn, she looks like she's wearing pajamas. Considering that her parents made a deal with the film crew that their children never be filmed in pajamas, maybe the reason is their pajamas include pants.

The pineapple looks small to me.

I guessed this before, but my random guess is that the baby will born on Jessa's birthday.

I swear I've seen Jackson wearing footie pajamas. Scott Enlow was holding him upside down, it would've been the first "behind the scenes" episode where Frank Sun foolishly impersonated JimGod Von Tontitown.

I think the Duggars say things to impress their fundie friends, then forget what they said. Despite the side hug rule I've seen Michelle "frontal" hug many of her children, and Johannah has more than one sleeveless outfits.

[queenanne]

the shear number of people who claim to have had to crank open their new wife's genitals with medical equipment freaked me out first time I went there.

 

Not to pull us too far aside or anything here, but wait, what?

[NewDigs]

Not to pull us too far aside or anything here, but wait, what?

I don't think I'd take intimacy advice from some guy who grabbed the back of his new wife's head in order to better smoosh her lips into his for their wedding kiss.

But it probably doesn't bother the, I'm here to serve you, fundies.

ETA OohOoh, new article on anal.

Edited October 31, 2015 by NewDigs

[JoanArc]

[sometimesy]

There is a lot more Duggar on that cover than Kardashian.. apocalypse!

[kokapetl]

Enough with the hand on the stomach Jessa! I know you want to emphasise that you're still pregnant, but anyone with half a brain could figure that out from your beach ball sized belly alone.

And lower your eyebrows, you don't want to end up like Jill "Luke Perry" Dillard do you?

Edited October 31, 2015 by Kokapetl

[Featherhat]

Not to pull us too far aside or anything here, but wait, what?

A number of men and women have discussed "having" to use dilators (a little like a speculum crossed with a dildo) to prepare a woman for sex on or after the wedding night because PIV wasn't working otherwise was pretty weird.

Then there were such charming posts as "why won't my wife let me play with her nipples even though it is painful to her?"

http://www.boards.themarriagebed.com/viewtopic.php?f=43&t=50721&hilit=nipples

A lot of it is patriarchal in the extreme and some of it is plain silly but it does show that many fundie Christians believe that whatever floats your boat *after* marriage is perfectly fine. I don't know what Gothard himself preaches about this but I hope at least some of his followers have found this.

That pic with the mag is actually cute. I'm never a fan of Jessa's expressions but it does prove she can have fun with herself doing that. She's making fun of trashy headlines whilst still making double publicity off them, girl has her eyes on the TLC/People prize.

[Vaysh]

Oh god, the first response to the nipple issue: "I tell her that they aren't hers but they are mine." WTF?? I'm so icked out right now.

 

I don't like Jessa much but I hope, hope, hope that this isn't how Bin was raised to view his wife and her body. Like property.

[NewDigs]

Would someone please tell me that's a parody site?

Please!

Edited October 31, 2015 by NewDigs

[Vaysh]

Hey, fundies need love too!

[Featherhat]

Oh god, the first response to the nipple issue: "I tell her that they aren't hers but they are mine." WTF?? I'm so icked out right now.

 

I don't like Jessa much but I hope, hope, hope that this isn't how Bin was raised to view his wife and her body. Like property.

I really hope so to. To be slightly fair there are a lot of posts talking about how husbands and wives must please and belong to *each other* and communicate their sexual needs to each other before marriage (lots of advice about email questionnaires and pre marriage counselling to make sure you are on the same page even if you haven't even kissed. But yeah there are also a lot of total D bags on the site who think only women should "take one for the team" or else they are being hard done by.

This all started as a way to say that fundiedom isn't all missionary with the lights off and that Jessa is well aware of that. She probably is and good for her, she'll need it going forward with her 20 year old husband who has no other pay check (together with her) other than more babies.

No it isn't a parody site it's a Christian (married) sex website which has been around a long time. Incidentally if you do to the "registration page" it asks which gender you are "he" "she" or "they". Seriously. Maybe they were trying to be inclusive and failed at the first hurdle?

Edited November 1, 2015 by Featherhat

[Ljohnson1987]

Isn't Jessa trying to induce labor screwing with their "In God's time" mantra?

[mbutterfly]

Yep, that having to tuck your stretched beyond recognition abdominal skin into one's pants is a cold slap of reality.

At least she won't have to do the lie on your back to zip your jeans maneuver. 

[cereality]

Based on just the one thread I read on that "marriage bedroom" website, I sincerely hope Bin has NOT found that site. Since he isn't the headship in any way in that marriage -- since he can't provide and thus takes money and direction from JB -- I can see him wanting to be the headship in the bedroom. I sure he wants it all the time, given that he's 19 and I'm sure Jessa is fine with that (though maybe not right now) since it was merely a physical attraction for them. But I would hate for him -- or any current/future fundie son in law to take the approach of -- you need to take one for the team and do something even if it hurts bc I want it. I mean in the real world, a woman would say -- fine if I need to take one for the team and let you play w/ my breasts which hurt, you're taking one for the team as I play with your testicles. But in this fundie world, I feel like a woman -- esp someone like Anna -- would be pressured to allow things that hurt bc her headship said so.

[Purpose to defraud]

I think she'll get pregnant again too quickly for that.  She may never have a waist again.  (That's why Michelle never tucks in her blouse and always looks like she's wearing maternity tops.)

When she realized that constant pregnancy is not figure enhancing, is when adoption talk started!

[Micks Picks]

After reading that link, I agree that Anna would likely take a horrific hit.  I had no idea that they were THAT obsessed with sex.  Unbelievable.  It's just not worth it to be taking the blame for not being sexual enough.  How often does Boob demand it?  2 or 3 times a day like some of those guys?  It wouldn't take long for a woman to be nothing anymore.  Wake up, have sex, feed the kids, diaper the kids, give a BJ, clean, diaper some more, nurse the baby, nurse the husband---pretty soon there is no person left there anymore.  And he never goes away.  No job.  No time for herself because there is no self left. No wonder she had a breakdown.  Anna looks good now, and according to the religion she had to raise 3 little ones while pregnant, which she wanted, but still had to be available for any permutations of sex that Josh may have wanted, when he wanted it.  This time away has done wonders for her.  I so hope she doesn't allow him into their lives again.  I'd be terrified that if I didn't do anything he wanted, stripper pole, things that hurt, dressing hookerish, he'd go for the kids.  I couldn't stand it.  She is so much better off now.  I think eventually I will read a few more topics on the marriage bed but am horrified enough for now.  I don't get the connection between God and this kind of life.  I don't get the connection between Saudi men and drinking and same sex relationships and ordering female employes to work in the nude, because allah said so, to be even slightly reasonable or religious.  This is a crock.

[GeeGolly]

Why are Fundies so preoccupied with sex? There is so much more to marriages than sex and babies. Once the baby making is done and sex is less frequent, what do they have left?

 

I guess when Jessa, Jill and Michelle are no longer stroking the men's penises, they'll be stroking their egos.

[Mollie]

Ben's Facebook header now says he is a writer.  He must think that the ability to post on Facebook is the definition of an author.

[roamyn]

Ben's Facebook header now says he is a writer. He must think that the ability to post on Facebook is the definition of an author.

I almost spit my tea out.

A writer?! He doesn't even know the English language, much less grammar!

[Churchhoney]

Why are Fundies so preoccupied with sex? There is so much more to marriages than sex and babies. Once the baby making is done and sex is less frequent, what do they have left?

 

I guess when Jessa, Jill and Michelle are no longer stroking the men's penises, they'll be stroking their egos.

 

My theory: Fundamentalisms of all kinds were invented by insecure, egotistical, control-freak men as a means of holding on to what they want. Ergo, fundamentalisms are obsessed with all the shallowest and meanest desires of such men.

 

Seems to me we have proof of this theory in just about everything that goes on in these groups.

[kandinski]

Yes,its a bunch of emasculated wannabe Alpha males.I looked up one of the traits of these kind men,I got this

"Men who abuse instead of protect women and children"........

Edited November 1, 2015 by kandinski

[Purpose to defraud]

Ben's Facebook header now says he is a writer.  He must think that the ability to post on Facebook is the definition of an author.

Or maybe he just learned HOW to write!

[charmed1]

Johannah looks a lot like Josh in that photo.

[Micks Picks]

I'd feel used like a prostitute without the big bucks.  My love would flee like the devil was chasing it.

[barbedwire]

So no Halloween baby.   I was hoping for a Hallie.

 

I agree with whoever said it - if this is all up to God, number of kids, spacing of said kids, etc. why is she trying to speed up delivery?

[Ljohnson1987]

I hope Jessa isn't as negligent as Jill was.  Remember, Jessa. Both  you and Quincy want to be okay when this is over. Please don't labor for 70+ hours to get higher TV ratings than Jill.

[Cherrio]

Ben's Facebook header now says he is a writer.  He must think that the ability to post on Facebook is the definition of an author.

Shakesbin?

[mimionthebeach]

I think the Duggars say things to impress their fundie friends, then forget what they said. Despite the side hug rule I've seen Michelle "frontal" hug many of her children, and Johannah has more than one sleeveless outfits.

Please tell me the side hug rule does not apply to mothers and children, especially the younger ones. That is so totally fucked up. They're like a seven-layer dip of dysfunction.

[JenCarroll]

Oh god, the first response to the nipple issue: "I tell her that they aren't hers but they are mine." WTF?? I'm so icked out right now.

 

Ha, when the babies come along they'll find out who the nipples belong to. I was glad to be able to breastfeed, but it did sometimes feel like I didn't own my own body. Her Tiny Majesty had firm opinions about whose boobs those were!

[SometimesBites]

Please tell me the side hug rule does not apply to mothers and children, especially the younger ones. That is so totally fucked up. They're like a seven-layer dip of dysfunction.

DING DING DING! You win the WHOLE internet today!

[Defrauder]

Jessa can't possibly get any bigger so the baby may as well just come out.

[Mollie]

I almost spit my tea out.

A writer?! He doesn't even know the English language, much less grammar!

 

Jessa's Facebook page says that she is an 'author' on the header.  (Jessa was interviewed by Charlie Richards, the middle-aged man who actually wrote the book Growing Up Duggar.)  Jessa actually posts more photos online than text.  She should call herself a photographer, not an author.

 

Jessa and Ben really do belong together.

[kokapetl]

Please tell me the side hug rule does not apply to mothers and children, especially the younger ones. That is so totally fucked up. They're like a seven-layer dip of dysfunction.

I don't consider this to be a side hug.

I also distinctly remember Jackson rushing out to Michelle getting out of a car and frontal hugging her.

[GeeGolly]

November 8th, 6.7ibs, 20", Benjamin Jr.