I've only kept current with Mykelti and FT in a cursory way--momentary snippets of the show, glances at social media when this forum links to it, etc. Even so, the dynamic between them is disturbingly familiar to me. I went into my first marriage with the same headstrong romantic blindness that I see in Mykelti. And just like FT is for her, my husband was a terrible choice for me--and the fact that our marriage was a glaring error was obvious to EVERYONE. I was deeply entrenched in a religious ethos that treasured the submissive, Proverbs 31 woman; getting married and starting the engine on that happily-ever-after machine was an all-consuming goal. All my closest friends were pairing off and getting engaged; meanwhile, I was desperately hoping my Mr. Right would show up.
The trouble was, when he did show up he was all kinds of wrong--and part of his wrongness was being incredibly possessive over me and having an ego that got off on having someone show him romantic interest. Mykelti's post (Twitter?) extolling the glory of her one year anniversary didn't make me think, "Well that's so nice...they must actually be happy." Instead, it was like a nasty flashback to how really, REALLY hard I worked to pretend my marriage was everything it should be, everything I desperately wanted it to be. Despite every red flag imaginable, I put my head down and bulled my way to the altar, then spent 18 years trying to prop that mess up all by myself. My impression is that Mykelti was desperate for validation, and after a lifetime of being taught that the pinnacle of a woman's life is to become the object of some dude's romantic interest, she dutifully put on blinders and forged ahead. If I had a crystal ball, I think it would tell me she is already often quite miserable, but that she'll stay in the ever-growing misery even after the point when she can't stand FT anymore, if only to prove that she knew what she was doing when she married him. I honestly feel so sad for her.