Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Readalot]

Your smile could melt the old age ice caps of Antarctica . https://www.facebook.com/JessaSeewald/photos/a.553510498109477.1073741827.553497828110744/632208466906346/?type=1&theater

. Oh Lordy. My now hubby wrote me almost that same letter when were 16. In fact we just moved and OUR 16 year old found a bunch of these "love" letters he wrote me. I think she was surprised how mushy her dad was.

[Mrsjumbo]

I would be beyond pissed if my DH publicly posted my personal letter!

[PinkSprinkles]

I am rolling my eyes so hard at that. Typical teenager. It sounds like the love letter my tenth grade English teacher found on the floor one day, read to the class, and then had us go through it and suggest ways to improve it. 

[GEML]

You can see that HIS mother spent a lot of time teaching him excellent penmanship. Even his lines are even.

[mimionthebeach]

Love the signature cross by his name. No forgetting that boy's a Christian.

[Lisa-M]

Jessa posted pictures on FB of Ben making her dinner. He made pasta that actually looked pretty good & made it "presentable" with onion & parsley.

Most impressive was that they were eating on real plates with silverware. I can't figure out where they are living though. The kitchen looks nice.

They are living in Josh and Anna's old house.

[cmr2014]

Yeah, it's dorky, and it looks like something a 16 year old boy would write -- but Jessa never had a 16 year old boyfriend.

 

I've been thinking recently about how genuinely starved these kids must be for love and affection. Jessa may be "cut and dried" as she says, but this all probably feels really good -- he really is besotted with her right now. And, he made her dinner! I wouldn't be surprised if this was the first time anyone ever made dinner for Jessa (I doubt it's an experience that any of the J'slaves have had).

[NikSac]

Yeah, it's dorky, and it looks like something a 16 year old boy would write -- but Jessa never had a 16 year old boyfriend.

 

I've been thinking recently about how genuinely starved these kids must be for love and affection. Jessa may be "cut and dried" as she says, but this all probably feels really good -- he really is besotted with her right now. And, he made her dinner! I wouldn't be surprised if this was the first time anyone ever made dinner for Jessa (I doubt it's an experience that any of the J'slaves have had).

 

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought it was kind of cute. Juvenile yeah, but I still thought it was cute.

 

Ugh it was already heartbreaking to picture the kids stumbling around the house at whatever hour to find dinner after they finished taking care of their parents' kids, but it never even dawned on me that they were probably lucky if the food was still warm. I'm glad someone's making dinner for Jessa, and that she's enjoying it.

[jb0495]

I'll be curious to see if they show any house renovations this season. Of course, we know the howlers need to be taught how to install cabinets & granite countertops!

[BitterApple]

Wow, was that kitchen photo of Ben taken in Josh and Anna's old house? If so, that place got some major upgrades, it looks really nice.

[Temperance]

One) I don't believe Ben and Jessa are doing anything to prevent pregnancy. While most people get pregnant during the first year, not everyone has a honeymoon baby (Jill). It's also possible that Jessa is pregnant not telling (even her sister waited until she was eight weeks along.)

Two) While I agree financial security is ideal and having an income is better for anyone, I actually Ben would make an okay father. He seems sweet with kids and has a warm affectionate heart, which I think are good qualities for a potential father.  He does seem immature, but not immature enough that he couldn't be trusted to watch the kids while Jessa goes out. 

Three) His letter is dorky, but sweet.

[farmgal4]

That love letter was nausea-inducing IMO, but he does have beautiful penmanship!

Wow, was that kitchen photo of Ben taken in Josh and Anna's old house? If so, that place got some major upgrades, it looks really nice.

I'm thinking that they are living in Josh and Anna's old house.

[jb0495]

If Jessa is pregnant & about 8 weeks, they still got pregnant pretty quickly after the wedding.

[Jellybeans]

I think it is sweet. I am 60 and I get sweet letters like that from my s/o, minus the cross. Why do people stop doing these things when they get "old"?

[PinkSprinkles]

I'm not against love letters at any age, but there's something just so fake about saying someone's smile can melt an ice cap. It's also very impersonal and kind of shallow. There's no mention of anything but her looks in the letter. There's nothing wrong with finding your spouse attractive, but I would hope you would find other things to appreciate about your spouse, like their personality, sense of humor, selflessness, industriousness, ect. Maybe that's something that comes with age and experience, I don't know. 

[RazzleberryPie]

You can see that HIS mother spent a lot of time teaching him excellent penmanship. Even his lines are even.

I suspect so many of these homeschool kids have excellent penmanship, is because it's far easier for a non-trained teacher (aka Mom) to teach penmanship than say, physics or trig. There's a small fundie school near me, and several of the elementary age teachers don't even have degrees. They get away with this because they have one or two teachers with degrees 'overseeing' several teachers who have high school diplomas or maybe a year or two of community college or unaccredited bible college semesters. Many of the kids absolutely excel until about 5th grade, have excellent spelling, vocabulary, penmanship, Bible knowledge, American history, etc., knowledge, but the second they have to start learning harder science, foreign languages or mathematics, they struggle. When the kids start wanting to go to public school for sports, dances, etc., their test scores and SAT/ACT results really reflect having a bad curriculum and untrained teachers.

Yeah, it's dorky, and it looks like something a 16 year old boy would write -- but Jessa never had a 16 year old boyfriend.

 

I've been thinking recently about how genuinely starved these kids must be for love and affection. Jessa may be "cut and dried" as she says, but this all probably feels really good -- he really is besotted with her right now. And, he made her dinner! I wouldn't be surprised if this was the first time anyone ever made dinner for Jessa (I doubt it's an experience that any of the J'slaves have had).

 

I think Jessa's 'cut and dry' personality is partly genuinely the one she was born with, but also a defense mechanism to not get too attached to any one or anything, because it will either be seen as an idol and 'giving pieces of your heart away,' plus it has been ingrained in her that the world is evil, any one outside their family and Gothardland is evil, and if you associate with them, you will become evil, rejected from your family and then you'll go straight to hell as punishment. Honestly, if she didn't have an arranged marriage, I think it would be almost impossible for her to meet someone on a normal level and develop a relationship.

One) I don't believe Ben and Jessa are doing anything to prevent pregnancy. 

I don't either. She's been married for three whole months. There's something like a 30% chance (i think?) of healthy women in their 20s having regular sex to get pregnant each month. If she's not pregnant within 6 months of being married, it will be medically surprising, but not worth panicking and calling the fertility doc. Who knows about Ben, too. I'd presume he's young and healthy, too, but all the fault can't be placed on Jessa if there's no pregnancy yet.

[Jellybeans]

I still want my s/o to send me corny emails or leave cheesy notes, and if he thinks my blue eyes can freeze the sun, I ain't correcting him. LOL.

[RazzleberryPie]

I still want my s/o to send me corny emails or leave cheesy notes, and if he thinks my blue eyes can freeze the sun, I ain't correcting him. LOL.

Was it Fred Flinstone who wrote the love note to Wilma and said she had 'eyes like frying pans?" That's true love right there.

[trimthatfat]

My husband and I exchange love letters all of the time. I am so anti-technology (outside of work and visiting this site...haha) that hand-written letters are really special to me. So I give Ben credit for trying. If the content means something to Jessa, that's all that matters.

[drafan]

I love the last line of that letter.....

 

"I love YOUR more than fondest words and fair speech can express."

 

So he loves her WHAT ? Ass? Boobs?

 

And "fondest words" ? "Fair speech" ? Really? Did he use a thesaurus, grade 3 edition?

 

So hilarious.

[cereality]

Nice to see someone making dinner for Jessa. I'm sure it doesn't happen often or ever bc I'm sure wants to maintain a traditional household, but I'm glad Ben's willing to do this even once in a while. Living with Ben I'm assuming will allow some "normalcy" for Ben and Jessa and their eventual family -- in that, I assume his family did a traditional, sit down dinner time with the family -- as most people do. The Duggars are odd in that sense as it seems like Jana and the older daughters are responsible for preparing the meal sometime during the day and then everyone wanders through whenever and helps themselves with their paper plates. I'm sure Ben found it weird when he lived with them that he'd eat with Jessa and whoever else wanted to eat right then, as other people wandered in at various times and joined the meal. I imagine his home involved all 7 or 8 or whatever siblings sitting down with mom and dad, eating a meal prepared by the mom and served with real utensils and I imagine that's what he expects in his own home too.

[Mrsjumbo]

One) I don't believe Ben and Jessa are doing anything to prevent pregnancy. While most people get pregnant during the first year, not everyone has a honeymoon baby (Jill). It's also possible that Jessa is pregnant not telling (even her sister waited until she was eight weeks along.)

Two) While I agree financial security is ideal and having an income is better for anyone, I actually Ben would make an okay father. He seems sweet with kids and has a warm affectionate heart, which I think are good qualities for a potential father. He does seem immature, but not immature enough that he couldn't be trusted to watch the kids while Jessa goes out.

Three) His letter is dorky, but sweet.

Ha, where would Jessa go out without Ben?

[Sew Sumi]

I love the last line of that letter.....

 

"I love YOUR more than fondest words and fair speech can express."

 

So he loves her WHAT ? Ass? Boobs?

 

And "fondest words" ? "Fair speech" ? Really? Did he use a thesaurus, grade 3 edition?

 

So hilarious.

The Doug Phillips (forever a Tool) school of Flowery Prose. Don't forget, the Seewalds are Calivinsts who followed Phillips until his (very fortunate) fall from grace. 

[Zahdii]

I love the last line of that letter.....

 

"I love YOUR more than fondest words and fair speech can express."

 

So he loves her WHAT ? Ass? Boobs?

 

And "fondest words" ? "Fair speech" ? Really? Did he use a thesaurus, grade 3 edition?

 

So hilarious.

 

I think he meant to write "I love you more than fondest words and fair speech can express."

 

I give the boy props for effort, but I'm pretty sure he lifted phrases from other peoples writing.

[GEML]

There's been some talk about the Duggars poor penmanship. That was more the point of my comment.

[floridamom]

You know what, if Ben wants to pour his heart out to Jessa in a love letter, great, but that should have remained between the two of them. Jessa, IMO, should have never posted something so personal on her facebook in the first place. It goes to show you, that this family doesn't know any boundaries about anything.

[Joe Jitsu913]

I think he meant to write "I love you more than fondest words and fair speech can express."

I give the boy props for effort, but I'm pretty sure he lifted phrases from other peoples writing.

It almost sounded like he was trying to emulate Shakespeare. Bless his teenage, fundy heart.

[TheDoctorsCompanio]

It almost sounded like he was trying to emulate Shakespeare. Bless his teenage, fundy heart.

::gasp:: They're allowed to read Shakespeare? How would he even know haha.

[GEML]

It did not sound to me like Shakespeare. It sounded, actually, a lot like the love letter the grandmother reads in the GARFIELD CHRISTMAS SPECIAL.

[ChicksDigScars]

DId you ever notice that all the food porn photos that the Duggars post (Jill and Jessa, especially) are healthy? as if they've been told to NOT post photos of TTC and processed foods, since the Internets insist that the family only eats crap?  It just seems that by posting smoothies, omelets and veggies, that they're following marching orders. 

 

Josh would have a hard time following these orders. Josh's Food Porn is deep fried and double wide. 

[trimthatfat]

I think it's as simple as Jessa and Jill discovering that there is more to food than processed garbage. It probably helps that both Ben and Derrick seem to be into relatively healthy foods in general and both are gym goers.

[maraleia]

DId you ever notice that all the food porn photos that the Duggars post (Jill and Jessa, especially) are healthy? as if they've been told to NOT post photos of TTC and processed foods, since the Internets insist that the family only eats crap?  It just seems that by posting smoothies, omelets and veggies, that they're following marching orders. 

 

Josh would have a hard time following these orders. Josh's Food Porn is deep fried and double wide. 

Or they are finally out from under the thumb of J'Chelle and Boob's food choices and are finally eating the healthy food they've craved for years.

[DangerousMinds]

I don't know, remember all the soft drinks and junk on their registries?

[trimthatfat]

I don't know, remember all the soft drinks and junk on their registries?

That's true, but I think Derick at least understands moderation. The lunch he packed for that hike was pretty nutritious, so I have a hard time believing he eats unhealthily most of the the time. Ben works out often and he would know that soda and candy cannot fuel the human body, nor will it keep it you in shape.

[cereality]

Or they are finally out from under the thumb of J'Chelle and Boob's food choices and are finally eating the healthy food they've craved for years.

I imagine they're just posting pics of what they're eating and what they are eating (as opposed to say Josh and Anna) is healthier. I have to imagine Derick and Ben demand or expect some healthy fare, so Jill and Jessa have had to adapt. Ben is a bit work out guy -- I'm guessing he was drinking/eating smoothies, omelets and pasta in his own home as those are staples for people trying to get in protein and carbs for weight lifting or running; so now he expects to eat those in his own home. As for Derick, he doesn't seem to be as big on working out and looking at the registry maybe he's into junk to some extent like all young people, but he was also raised in a middle/upper middle class home, so I'm guessing he's used to veggies and fruit at every meal -- not just packaged food. The poster above is right -- the picnic lunch he packed consisted of things like hummus, figs and cheese. Jill has also said that he enjoyed Nepali food, which is usually pretty heavy on veggies, and she's said his favorite dinner is something like stuffed squash or peppers. While TTC may be a novelty for him every so often, I expect that he wants meals to include veggies etc. Hence the food pics from both couples end up being healthier, while they've got TLC showing Josh and Anna going to some deep fried chicken place on their road trip.

[Iwadre]

OH No Jessa is posting about her gourmet meals. They actually look pretty good, but her writing skills are so strange. It sounds as if she has difficulty writing casual sentences. Maybe she is just overthinking what she writes, but to be honest she sounds sooooo uneducated. Which I guess is not a surprise. She sounds like someone I would not want to spend more than 5 minutes with.

[Sew Sumi]

That turkey had waaaaay too much rosemary on it, and came out looking very dry. Unless she had a 16 lb. turkey for two, the four hours the poor thing spent in the oven was far too long. Of course, she said it was great; what else can she really say? Given how both families ate for much of Jessa and Ben's childhoods, I also wonder if they know what a really well-cooked turkey is supposed to taste like? 

 

As for Ben eating certain foods for working out, that's hard to say. He's 19. Nothing he puts in his body is really going to make a difference to his workout regimen at this point. The Seewalds may have eaten marginally better, but with Mike working 60 hours a week at windshield repair, I don't think there were tons of fresh fruit/veggie smoothies, or other expensive fresh foods going on there. 

[TheDoctorsCompanio]

They buy organic ingredients. Impressed.

[WTFFF]

Nice to see Jessa at least trying to cook food that's fit for human consumption.  Turkeys are damn near impossible to cook without drying out; hopefully she just needs some practice.  (That's a hell of a lot of rosemary, though.  Maybe she and Ben are both "low tasters.")   And it's also nice to see that Ben doesn't think cooking is beneath him as a man - though that could easily change once the novelty of sex wears off and he's no longer trying to impress her.

[ginger90]

Nice to see Jessa at least trying to cook food that's fit for human consumption.  Turkeys are damn near impossible to cook without drying out

Try the oven bags! Turkey comes out nice and moist and takes about half the time to cook.

 

Has it been stated where they are actually living yet?

[Portia]

I do turkey the English way--covered with raw bacon. It self-bastes and seals in the juices. As long as I don't overcook the turkey, it comes out perfect every time.

[lookeyloo]

Turkey is not that hard to cook.  Modern turkeys take a whole lot less time than what is called for in older cook books.  I have a recipe I've been using since the 60s and the turkey used to take twice as long to cook.  

[DamWrite]

Has it been stated where they are actually living yet?

Yes, they're living in Josh and Anna's first house aka Grandma Duggar's house.

[TheDoctorsCompanio]

https://m.facebook.com/19KidsandCounting/photos/a.448311505520.372107.174015830520/10155182005315521/?type=1&source=48

That looks like pants on Jessa or a very very tight skirt. Which I'm not surprised. It looked like she was wearing leggings or something in that Christmas video. (Hope I copied the link correctly)

[Catlyn]

I enlarged it on my tablet. Slim skirt with boots. Nothing to get to excited about, but it is a cute picture. Jill looks like she's ready!

[Absolom]

Jessa has on narrow skirt, leggings, and boots.  What they are missing is the undershirts!!  I'm happy to see that bit go.  

 

Jill has carried large and stuck out in front the entire pregnancy.  The baby may simply be in a bad position.  I carried like that one pregnancy and the child was posterior.  

[Jellybeans]

So happy Jessa is not pregnant.

[Sew Sumi]

Ugh, the promos are going to come fast and furious this week. 

[TheDoctorsCompanio]

So happy Jessa is not pregnant.

Ditto.

It is a cute setup they have on.

[BitterApple]

Or they are finally out from under the thumb of J'Chelle and Boob's food choices and are finally eating the healthy food they've craved for years.

I agree and now that Jessa and Jill have their own households they can control what they buy and eat. They don't have to worry about cooking for 20 on a limited budget.

 

I noticed on one of Jessa's Instagram posts she mentions jogging with Ben. I wonder if she wears pants to do that, I don't know how you'd run in a skirt without it riding up your legs.

Edited February 10, 2015 by BitterApple