Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage

[Amethyst]

Ugh, so many mentioned here that I loathe.  The Sprint "framily" (seriously, what does even mean?) the creepy DirecTV marionettes, and the Velveeta commercial, which is just gross.  How can you make delicious melted cheese look gross?

And Skittles.  I love Skittles, but I haven't been able to eat them since they started their new commercials.  Nothing beats the one where the kid apparently has Skittles for teeth so a girl french kisses him and eats the Skittles.  Or the one where a kid had acne, only the acne was Skittles, and same thing; a girl made out with him, and lo and behold, she developed Skittle acne too!  Just disgusting.  When did my beloved Skittles become bodily secretions?

 

Wendy the perky redhead is mostly tolerable, but I do remember the commercial when they had the chicken sandwich for $1, and she would go "I have a Wendy's chicken sandwich for... a buck buck (like a chicken)" and I just wanted someone to throw a sandwich at her head.  Just shut up, Wendy.

[GaT]

 

And Skittles.  I love Skittles, but I haven't been able to eat them since they started their new commercials.  Nothing beats the one where the kid apparently has Skittles for teeth so a girl french kisses him and eats the Skittles.  Or the one where a kid had acne, only the acne was Skittles, and same thing; a girl made out with him, and lo and behold, she developed Skittle acne too!  Just disgusting.  When did my beloved Skittles become bodily secretions?

I had forgotten about the Skittles commercials. I don't like Skittles to begin with, but every time I saw the girl picking them off the kids face & eating them. I gagged. That is beyond disgusting, I don't understand how that can possibly increase sales.

 

This also reminded me of another bunch of commercials I hate, the Sour Patch Kids "first they're sour, then they're sweet" commercials. They just annoy the hell out of me. 

[Jamoche]

No, they wouldn't.  Teens tend to think that they're immortal and invulnerable and that the bad stuff can never happen to them.  It's an attitude that they don't really outgrow until they hit about 40 or so, unfortunately (which is why they balk at buying catastrophic health insurance that they're sure they'll never need) -- and that's because the bad stuff DOES start happening to them after that age.

I don't know, I was barely out of my teens when my grandmother brought me along for hand-holding when she got hip replacement surgery. That entire floor of the hospital was full of little old ladies - little in the "hunched over from osteoporosis" sense. I never wanted to mainline milk and other calcium-rich stuff so much in my life.

[FineWashables]

I'm so glad I get to vent now.

 

First, and above all, I loathe Flo.  Why would you choose to have your product represented by someone who's strikingly unattractive, wears makeup that went out in the 80s and a hairstyle that went out in the 60s, and is dressed like a dental hygenist???  For a company that's named Progressive????  I don't get it and I hate it.

 

Why are couples sitting outside in the bathtub all the time?  What the hell is that about?  What does a bathtub have to do with your product?  What does a bathtub have to do with the lifestyle of the people you're marketing your product to?  Every time I see one of these I wonder how they keep a bathtub clean enough to sit in when it's outside.  Do they have to scoop sand out of it when it's on the shoreline?  Pull dead leaves out of it when it's in the woods?  I'm so distracted by this I've never stopped to remember the product name, let alone figure out what it does.

 

I have no idea what product they're advertising with that Sara Bareilles song but I want to know why I would be drawn to a product that requires me to be brave to use it.  Is it unsafe?  Am I likely to be gambling on it working at all, and need to be brave because I may be throwing away my money?  Stupid.

 

It's gotten to the point where I can't see Jamie Lee Curtis without thinking about her excretory system.  That's as politely as I can put it.  And with all the things going on in my life, I really don't need to think about Jamie Lee Curtis' toilet habits.  Or lack thereof.

 

Finally -- for now at least -- there's that woman who encourages us to call an incontinence specialist to discuss what kind of pee pee pads would suit us best.  I thought my job was nasty, but being the person who discusses pee pee pads with adults who wet their pants would be worse.  And I can't stop thinking about that whenever those ads are on.

 

I feel better now.  Thank you.

[iMonrey]

 

But you know what the fuck I DO expect?  The kid's PARENTS to control their child and offer an apology if for some reason they fail to do that for a moment or two.  I cannot STAND the message this commercial seems to reinforce - that we all have no choice but to put up with the bad behavior of precious children that no one seems to be able to discipline.

 

I'm glad I'm not the only one who wants someone to smack that little brat. And I don't care if it's not politically correct to say so. Where the heck are his parents? Just sitting there letting him terrorize the passengers in the seats in front of them? 

[Bastet]

Where the heck are his parents? Just sitting there letting him terrorize the passengers in the seats in front of them?

 

Probably.  I once garnered applause from surrounding passengers when I demanded that a father do something about his two devil spawn who were making our lives miserable while he ignored them in favor of eating his breakfast.

 

As noted above, this ongoing trend in commercials where abdication of parental responsibility - to correct children's behavior, to make them eat a balanced meal, etc. - is presented as the norm, the effects of which the rest of us are just supposed to suffer gladly, is thoroughly aggravating. 

[FineWashables]

I've been the victim of prolonged bad behavior by children many many times, and here's what always does the trick: smile sweetly and curse at the child.  Use some really unacceptable words.  The parents will immediately spring into outraged action.  I then tell them that they can't do a fucking thing to change my behavior, but there's a lot they can start doing to control their child's behavior instead if they don't want somebody treating the kid like this again.  I had a psychologist mom tell me that her child is "just exploring her own boundaries" so she can discover for herself how to get along with people.  I then pointed out that this is exactly what I just taught her.

[CoderLady]

I love this so very, very much! It's the "smile sweetly" part that makes it work, because the parents can't say you're threatening their little hellspawn. +10!

[Prevailing Wind]

 

Why are couples sitting outside in the bathtub all the time?

This disturbs me, too.  It's an ad for a boner pill.  Shouldn't they be in the same tub?  WHAT is the point of being in two different tubs after he's taken his boner pill?

[Rick Kitchen]

Maybe the two of them and his boner don't fit in the same tub?

 

If I were on a plane and a little brat were attacking the back of my seat, my first action would have been to confront the parents, and if that didn't resolve the situation immediately, my second action would be to contact a flight attendant to get the situation resolved.

[aradia22]

 

First, and above all, I loathe Flo.  Why would you choose to have your product represented by someone who's strikingly unattractive, wears makeup that went out in the 80s and a hairstyle that went out in the 60s, and is dressed like a dental hygenist???  For a company that's named Progressive????  I don't get it and I hate it.

I like Flo. What I'm annoyed with is how every person in a commercial suddenly becomes a spokesperson. Like, good for you "can you hear me now" guy, but at some point it becomes like a bad SNL skit that needs to end. Not funny anymore/We get it. I think one of the worst offenders is the woman behind the desk at the Toyota car dealership. Who was clamoring for her to be a recurring character?

[Tunia]

This disturbs me, too.  It's an ad for a boner pill.  Shouldn't they be in the same tub?  WHAT is the point of being in two different tubs after he's taken his boner pill?

 

I've always imagined that if the camera were to swing around, that this is what you'd see:

 

https://www.google.com/search?q=loch+ness+monster&tbm=isch&tbo=u&source=univ&sa=X&ei=MkqSU6OVDoykyATFrIHYCw&ved=0CDcQsAQ&biw=1038&bih=534#facrc=_&imgdii=_&imgrc=OXY-5uNQ4DgF-M%253A%3BUCTF3MiPVlIKJM%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fblogs.scientificamerican.com%252Ftetrapod-zoology%252Ffiles%252F2013%252F07%252FLoch-Ness-Monster-Shiels-muppet-photo-small-version-300-px-tiny-July-2013.jpg%3Bhttp%253A%252F%252Fblogs.scientificamerican.com%252Ftetrapod-zoology%252F2013%252F07%252F10%252Fphotos-of-the-loch-ness-monster-revisited%252F%3B300%3B406

[xls]

We probably shouldn't talk politics in this forum, but if we could, I would have a lot to say about him.

IA, Rick-can't stand to even look at Papa John.

[AimingforYoko]

The redhead is married to the hamster and the french speaking girl is their daughter.  The older black man "DAD" is the redhead's father.

And you guys know the hamster is Andrew "Dice" Clay, right?

[bilgistic]

Found it.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EKFZsccJASI

Yuck! OK, I'm going there. The ad says all that underwear is being tossed because of stains, so I'm imagining they're all dirty. Also, seriously? I've never had a pair I couldn't get clean. Is tossing underwear really a thing? Seems like a solution to a made-up problem to me.

I'm jealous of either your lack of menstrual disasters or laundry prowess; I don't know which.

[Cobalt Stargazer]

 

WHAT is the point of being in two different tubs after he's taken his boner pill?

 

Maybe the two of them and his boner don't fit in the same tub?

Can't. Stop. Laughing.

[Haleth]

I'm more than a little offended by the marionette wife who needs such reassurance that she is pretty and then starts to perform for her husband. Just too squicky.

On the other hand I have to admit the framily is beginning to grow on me. I think it was the addition of GorDON to the group.

[Watcher0363]

I'm more than a little offended by the marionette wife who needs such reassurance that she is pretty and then starts to perform for her husband. Just too squicky.

On the other hand I have to admit the framily is beginning to grow on me. I think it was the addition of GorDON to the group.

Okay I just saw the latest Direct TV no wires commercial where the wife's father is there for a visit. And for some reason wants to fight over the no wires love the husband has developed. These commercials are starting to grow on me. The marionette is kind of cute, too much Hentai??????

[Tunia]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvtK17hlnfY

 

I've seen homeless people who look better than this "stud".  Just can't stand the sight of him.  Did the producers of this really think his look is appealing?  NOT!  Add to that the fact that he seems to have a real attitude and gives the impression that he thinks he's so buff, and you have a nauseating combination.  Sooooo full of himself - check out how he admires himself in the mirror.  Blech.  His poor date/wife is just along for the ride, put there merely to adore this supposed Adonis.  It's all about him, all the time (as he stares wistfully off into space).  Barf...

[spaceytraci1208]

Just saw a Papa John's commercial where he talks about how he learned to make pizza from a "real" Italian and then from a "real" Greek...like they're mythical creatures or some shit

[dubbel zout]

An ad that bugs me is the one for insurance or an annuity or whatever and it's sad dad saying he knows the name of ten princesses, has tea parties with, and braids the hair of his two daughters because he's raising them alone. Implying that if his wife were still there, she'd be doing all that stuff—he wouldn't have to. Dude, my brother does all that (maybe not the hair) with his girls because he's an involved father, not because there's no other parent to do it. Ugh. So much hate.

Edited June 8, 2014 by dubbel zout

[janie jones]

Well, and also, it's fine if his kids like princesses, but I mean, neither of my parents knew the name of any princesses, because my sister and I didn't.  I hate that so many little girls are portrayed as being princess-fixated when it's not reality.

[Taeolas]

A while back, McD's were advertising their Whole Wheat Egg McMuffins with the extremely annoying "Whaaaahahhhtttt??" commercials (that were even more annoying on the radio). I think they realized after the fact how annoying those were because the new version has the almost as annoying "I know." version. The TV version even ends with some guy going "Whaaaaahhht??" at the end, and getting glared at, but it's all still annoying. They can all leave my TV and Radio now please.

[legaleagle53]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MvtK17hlnfY

 

I've seen homeless people who look better than this "stud".  Just can't stand the sight of him.  Did the producers of this really think his look is appealing?  NOT!  Add to that the fact that he seems to have a real attitude and gives the impression that he thinks he's so buff, and you have a nauseating combination.  Sooooo full of himself - check out how he admires himself in the mirror.  Blech.  His poor date/wife is just along for the ride, put there merely to adore this supposed Adonis.  It's all about him, all the time (as he stares wistfully off into space).  Barf...

Oh, I don't know.  I certainly wouldn't kick him out of bed -- but the scruff has to go. It makes him look a good ten years older than he needs to, and I think it would bring out his eyes better if he were clean-shaven.

[dubbel zout]

Well, and also, it's fine if his kids like princesses, but I mean, neither of my parents knew the name of any princesses, because my sister and I didn't.  I hate that so many little girls are portrayed as being princess-fixated when it's not reality.

 

It doesn't matter what his daughters are interested in; the guy is acting like the only reason he's doing it is because he has to, as he's the only parent. Like, it's such a chore to have to be involved in his kids' lives. That's my big problem with the ad.

Edited June 9, 2014 by dubbel zout

[ari333]

I hate the KFC, "I ATE THE BONES!"

 

Also one that bugs  me is the cereal commercial. "Milk and cereal, cereal and milk... it has protein and..." it sounds like they're saying, "greens" Then on re-listen it sounded like, "brains." OK, it's "grains." And isn't the protein mostly in the milk? 

 

As for the tubs and the boner pills - having intercourse in water is not great for the woman. Just saying.

Edited June 9, 2014 by ari333

[PrincessEnnui]

I really hate the Tina Fey Chase credit card commercials. Its not cute or charming and she sure doesn't seem like a modern day every woman. Not only does she come off as seriously annoying, it really makes her look like she's just straight up bothering the people performing services for her. Its especially galling when she eats the damn potpourri! Really?

[Tunia]

Oh, I don't know.  I certainly wouldn't kick him out of bed -- but the scruff has to go. It makes him look a good ten years older than he needs to, and I think it would bring out his eyes better if he were clean-shaven.

LOL - he's all yours, legaleagle!  That's what makes the world go 'round,,,as is said, there's a seat for every butt.   I, too, prefer my men close shaven, but can tolerate a little scruff on the right face - his isn't it.  Moreso, I don't like the 'tude he's generating.   Hopefully, IRL he's not such a dickwad.

Edited June 9, 2014 by Tunia

[legaleagle53]

LOL - he's all yours, legaleagle!  That's what makes the world go 'round,,,as is said, there's a seat for every butt.   I, too, prefer my men close shaven, but can tolerate a little scruff on the right face - his isn't it.  Moreso, I don't like the 'tude he's generating.   Hopefully, IRL he's not such a dickwad.

LOL  Fortunately, I'd have him too busy doing naughty things to me in bed for him to ever have a chance to speak -- and men aren't really known for being talkers in bed anyway (we tend to say stupid stuff that always gets us into trouble), so I wouldn't know him from a dickweed in any event!

[Taeolas]

Ok "Mark" who apparently buys a membership for Costco, and goes around opening packages so he can buy normal proportions can go away. He's wrecking all that product, just so he can "buy what he wants". If he wants lesser proportions, then he should go to his local grocery stores instead where they sell in those sizes. Instead of being a sucky customer and causing all those losses. 

[Watcher0363]

I really hate the Tina Fey Chase credit card commercials. Its not cute or charming and she sure doesn't seem like a modern day every woman. Not only does she come off as seriously annoying, it really makes her look like she's just straight up bothering the people performing services for her. Its especially galling when she eats the damn potpourri! Really?

I worship Tina Fey, she can do no wrong. What I would not give to be the one licking the yogurt out of her hair. With that a new fetish is born.

 

Tina: Is it still good?

Me: Tina, it's all good, so very good!!

Edited June 10, 2014 by Watcher0363

[Lola16]

I really hate the Tina Fey Chase credit card commercials. Its not cute or charming and she sure doesn't seem like a modern day every woman. Not only does she come off as seriously annoying, it really makes her look like she's just straight up bothering the people performing services for her. Its especially galling when she eats the damn potpourri! Really?

They are Amex commercials.  Another one in a long series of commercials where they have A listers waving around their entry level charge card.  As if any of these celebs have anything other than a black card.  More realistic would be platinum. smh.

[PrincessEnnui]

Thanks. There's so many celebs hawking credit card(s) these days I must have confused them.

[aradia22]

I like the Tina Fey commercials. They're cute and quirky in an inoffensive way. 

 

The ones I really hate that I had forgotten I hated because they've thankfully slowed down on showing them are the Allstate "mayhem" commercials. There was never a more punchable face in the world of commercials!

[ZaldamoWilder]

 

 

So yeah.  Who the fuck expects a child that age (they describe him as a toddler but that's stretching the definition I think) to apologize so maturely?  Not me, that's for sure.  But you know what the fuck I DO expect?  The kid's PARENTS to control their child and offer an apology if for some reason they fail to do that for a moment or two.  I cannot STAND the message this commercial seems to reinforce - that we all have no choice but to put up with the bad behavior of precious children that no one seems to be able to discipline. 

 

This is a super pet peeve of mine.  Yes, children will behave as children.  This is why adults need to teach them how to behave properly.  And children learn by repetition.  So it may take a couple or two hundred times to correct the behavior.  You may have to do it the whole fucking flight.  But you know what, that's your job as a parent.  It is not anyone's job to put up with your obnoxious kids.  Toddler boy should have been pulled back by his hair when he was hanging over the seat in front of him.

 

Rant over.

 

Please marry me.    Picture it, Valentine's Day 2014.  JFK to San Juan, U.S. Scare, Economy.  This kid, (he was at least 6) in the seat behind mine (because they're ALWAYS in the seat behind mine) fidgeted and kicked my chair for the duration of the 3.5 hour flight.  I'll wait out take off and getting settled and general restlessness, but now we're about 45 minutes beyond takeoff and my patience is witling.  I turn and say to his mom, please have your baby stop kicking, see that's not only a floatation device it's also my spine.  She says nothing but gives me what must be the universal, you're an asshole for not wanting to be subjected to my precious bundle of joy's every movement for the next 170 minutes.  We land, I'm waiting for my dude to come out of the bathroom.  I'm approached by this older couple making small talk.  I've got my hand on my lower back, the husband goes rough flight?  I said a little bit, we just landed from jfk. He goes oh we just got off that flight it wasn't that bad.  I said the flight itself wasn't, I was seated in front of restless kindergartner.   For some reason I can't figure out, he takes this super personally and says huffily: do you have kids?  I said yup, but she's not allowed to make anyone else's life miserable except mine.  He goes well it's just something children do.  I go agreed, so if you don't mind your precious bundle kicking you in the fucking spleen for 3 hours then seat em in the chair behind y-o-u.  He and his wife walk off offended and at that moment my boyfriend emerges to find me loud talking a semi-senior citizen and gives me the stop-it look.  Because yeah, I'm the asshole, again. 

 

sorry, this had nothing to do with nothing, except my irrational contempt for small children.    good morning! lol.

[AntiBeeSpray]

Lexus does that kind of ad every year around the holidays... except a couple years ago they got really obnoxious and did a series of ads about people who surprise their loved ones by presenting them with a decoy gift.

 

The one I remember was a music box and when the recipient opens it, the music box plays the Lexus jingle... at which point the recipient makes a thrilled "You got me a Lexus!" face. It's annoying enough to suggest giving a car as a gift (I knew a guy who did that once, unfortunately he wanted to surprise his wife at work and driving a car with a bow on top is very difficult) but to have people 1) know the Lexus jingle outside of watching TV ads 2) respond to hearing that jingle by thinking they must be getting a Lexus.

 

I can understand being walked to a car with a ribbon and thinking it's your present, but you've got to be pretty entitled to think someone is giving you a luxury car because you got a gift that plays that car's jingle. Even worse, I think there was one ad where the couple is in an elevator and the muzak turns into that jingle, presuming that something in a public place like that is about you.

 

 

 

This is the time of the year when I really appreciate my DVR. I record the morning hews just so that I can skip the commercials. Sure, I have to remind myself that when they say they're "live" at a location that was a half-hour ago but I love not seeing stupid political ads.

 

 

Having once worked in the back office for a food service chain, you don't have to get into politics to discuss why that guy is an asshat.

 

Same here. Dvr's come in handy in that regard.

[fastiller]

  I hate that so many little girls are portrayed as being princess-fixated when it's not reality.

Did you ever notice that princess-fixated little girls never want to become queen?  I can't fathom that: this is when they'd finally be in charge!

[ABay]

The marionette horrors are in heavy rotation during the Daily Show, Colbert Report,@midnight block on Comedy Central making me long for the usual all-alcohol-all-the-time ads. Since I DVR the shows I've managed to avoid the worst, just glimpsing the puppet dad in a wifebeater. It makes me ashamed to have Direct TV.

[FineWashables]

 

 

I hate that so many little girls are portrayed as being princess-fixated when it's not reality.

Did you ever notice that princess-fixated little girls never want to become queen?  I can't fathom that: this is when they'd finally be in charge!

Mr Washables and I were sitting in a park where there was a tall sculpture that kids could play on.  A little girl, maybe 7 or 8, climbed to the top and started yelling "I'm king of the mountain!"  Then she frowned, and thought about it, and yelled "I'm princess of the mountain!"  She had a problem with that too.  Then she figured it out, got excited and yelled "I'm ballerina of the mountain!"  So yeah, queen doesn't seem to come up.

[dubbel zout]

Maybe because in fairy tales the queens tend to evil?

[Bastet]

But of course.  Women + Power = Evil.  Gotta teach that lesson early.

Edited June 11, 2014 by Bastet

[Stella MD]

But of course. Women + Power = Evil. Gotta teach that lesson early.

But in addition to being generally evil, queens are always specifically out to get the sweet, young, innocent princesses. 'Cause that's how us jealous old hags roll...

[Aquarius]

But in addition to being generally evil, queens are always specifically out to get the sweet, young, innocent princesses. 'Cause that's how us jealous old hags roll...

 

But don't forget, beautiful.  'Cause that's the thing we jealous old hags find most important of all.

[PrincessEnnui]

Holy crap. I just realized I liked all these responses about Princesses vs. Queens and I just now remembered my screenname. In my defense, my name is a play on Prince Ennui from The World Ends With You.

 

Does anyone else hate those stupid Mayonnaise/Miracle Whip commercials? I hardly think adding condiments to a sandwich is mold breaking or inspirational FFS.

Edited June 12, 2014 by PrincessEnnui

[Lola16]

Holy crap. I just realized I liked all these responses about Princesses vs. Queens and I just now remembered my screenname. In my defense, my name is a play on Prince Ennui from The World Ends With You.

 

Does anyone else hate those stupid Mayonnaise/Miracle Whip commercials? I hardly think adding condiments to a sandwich is mold breaking or inspirational FFS.

Yup, the commercials are lame.  Can't say any one is worse than the other.  Maybe the goth woman who brings the egg salad?  They are equally sucky in my mind.

[Amethyst]

Does anyone else hate those stupid Mayonnaise/Miracle Whip commercials? I hardly think adding condiments to a sandwich is mold breaking or inspirational FFS.

 

LOL, I was just about to post in the other thread that I like those commercials.  The deviled egg one is OK, but the greasy spoon one just gets me. It really makes me want a coleslaw burger, so I guess the commercial worked.

 

 

Back to commercials that annoy: I also hate the "I ate the bones!" KFC commercials.  I guess they haven't heard of boneless chicken breasts.

 

And so much yes to that commercial with the kid kicking the airplane seat.  That one is teeth-grinding bad.

[Prevailing Wind]

Ya know what I like about this place?  We can wander - tell Bad Santa stories, for instance - without Mods slapping us down.  THANKS, Previously!

Edited June 13, 2014 by Prevailing Wind

[Haleth]

An ad that bugs me is the one for insurance or an annuity or whatever and it's sad dad saying he knows the name of ten princesses, has tea parties with, and braids the hair of his two daughters because he's raising them alone. Implying that if his wife were still there, she'd be doing all that stuff—he wouldn't have to. Dude, my brother does all that (maybe not the hair) with his girls because he's an involved father, not because there's no other parent to do it. Ugh. So much hate.

 

The thing that bugs me most is when one of the princesses offer to help fold laundry, then quickly adds, "Just kidding!"  Dad must not be doing too well teaching the little darlings manners.  They probably kick the back of plane seats too.

[ZaldamoWilder]

Lysol wipes "for when life gets messy".   The thing is if I suspect that I'm married to a man who would filet a raw, bloody 9lb pound bass on the same counter where he's changing our baby's dirty diaper (because there's nothing not normal about addressing a shitty diaper in the kitchen) I don't want dinner, I want a divorce.

 

p.s. If you're old enough to properly articulate how badly you want to injure me, you're officially too old to believe in Santa Clause.  Bye, little focker.

[merylinkid]

Gah, the I Ate the Bones commercials were the worst.   C'mon people are you that freaking oblivious that you can't tell when you are chewing something as hard as a bone versus soft chicken skin?   If you are, you got bigger problems than being confused about the new KFC menu item.