S04.E21: Reunion Part 1

[OnceSane]

Part 1 of 3. The SUR gang reunite, with Kristen taking the hot seat as James and Ariana grill her. Also: Mike Shay makes a reunion appearance; Lala talks about being a newbie at SUR; and Jax, Schwartz and Sandoval dish on their wild Las Vegas trip.

[Ubiquitous]

THREE parts?!?!?!

[OnceSane]

I guess everyone will have their say.

And I'll bet Tom's "band" will perform. With Scheana as a guest vocalist. ;)

[psychoticstate]

I'm clearly so basic and have such low standards that I am giddily awaiting this.

[bref]

Three parts is definitely overkill. Unless the ponies make an appearance.

[bblancobrnx]

I am happy it is 3 parts. I would take a 28 part reunion if it meant more of these idiots on my screen

[Jextella]

I am happy it is 3 parts. I would take a 28 part reunion if it meant more of these idiots on my screen

Seriously.  I scratch my head watching this thing.  Then I scratch my head wondering why I watch this thing.   It's all so confusing - but that is probably one of the reasons I tune in

 

Note to Bravo: THANK YOU for bringing the aftershow back ... and ... I hope the cast is getting paid more these days. 

[Rebecca]

They say "Mike Shay makes an appearance" like that's supposed to be a draw? Like, what's he got to say?

[walnutqueen]

They say "Mike Shay makes an appearance" like that's supposed to be a draw? Like, what's he got to say?

 

"Scheana, we need to leave L.A. and this show for my sobriety".

 

"Scheana, I want a divorce".

 

"Scheana, I had an affair with Brandi".

[WhosThatGirl]

Mike Shay will make more comments on "bitch ghost" Stassi. That's the only thing I took away from him this season.

 

I'm excited this thing is in three parts, actually also. I love these people because they are so ridiculous! I think my all time favorite moment at last years reunion was anytime James opened his mouth, there was a chorus of "SHUT UP JAMES!" Also, it's getting painfully obvious how much Lisa dislikes Kristen, she said on WWHL last week that Lala apparently redeems herself on the reunion. Lala is awful. I would take Kristen over Lala any day of the week. 

[nexxie]

What a crew this is - entertaining but such a mess!

Wish Lisa would get a stylist - she is too pretty for those godawful clothes she wears. "School marm" tonight. Just no.

[WhosThatGirl]

Lala looks not good with blonde hair. Also, yes, what is Lisa wearing?

[njbchlover]

Lala looks not good with blonde hair. Also, yes, what is Lisa wearing?

 

Lala needs to learn that troweling makeup over a bad complexion will only make your complexion look worse.  Her skin (under the makeup) looks really rough.  Scheana's makeup is also ridiculously heavy and bad, too.  

 

I agree on Lisa's outfit - definitely something weird going on - on my TV, it looks like a red scarf/neck bow thingy with a pink shirt, totally clashing and not complimentary at all.  Disappointing!!

 

ETA:  Sandoval's makeup is almost as bad!  

Edited March 22, 2016 by njbchlover

[WhosThatGirl]

Andy: So, did you quit pills cold turkey? No meetings?

Shay: Yes

Lisa: I don't understand.

 

Me either, Lisa. Seriously, I am sorry but this topic is way too serious for this show. 

[Jennifersdc]

Lala looks just dreadful.

[nexxie]

Good segment with Shay - glad things are better for him, and them!

[WhosThatGirl]

I can't say anything that I didn't already say on the Vegas trip and Arainia's birthday. I believe I said so much when the episode aired. 

[njbchlover]

Oh, all the cast's parents must be soooo proud!!! 

[WhosThatGirl]

Ha, I love Kristen more tonight. FI's "you are just saying what your therapist says to do" Kristen "Um, that's what therapy is". Love it. 

 

ETA: The hate on Kristen from everyone, aside from Katie and Jax-and somewhat Schwartz is kind of ridiculous. And from Lisa. She totally has favorites. 

Edited March 22, 2016 by WhosThatGirl

[racked]

FI is such a grumpy little bitch. Like anyone is shocked Kristen repeatedly cheated on him. Girl is crazy but in the best way.

I've been watching old seasons, which are new to me, and wow you all have good cause for calling Jax's head enormous. In season one he had a normal jawline! He was legitimately handsome. He's so gross and bloated and oily now. I don't understand Lisa's love for him.

[ivygirl]

ugh, these people. They're all grouchy, sobby, or finger-pointy.

Edited March 22, 2016 by ivygirl

[charmed1]

I can't believe I'm saying this, but Kristin was the cleanest and most fresh faced person on the reunion. The make up artists must hate these people. Ariana and Lala looked like decaying corpses. Flat Iron looked like a piece of bacon. Katie's make up was fine, but her hair and dress were so homely. Scheana looked horrible. I don't know what she's done to herself, but her face is gaunt and her teeth are huge. She's lost a lot of weight.

I'm cracking up at Donnie Wahlberg accidentally calling Kristin, Kristin Douche on WWHL.

[Ubiquitous]

I can't believe I'm saying this, but Kristin was the cleanest and most fresh faced person on the reunion. The make up artists must hate these people. Ariana and Lala looked like decaying corpses. Flat Iron looked like a piece of bacon. Katie's make up was fine, but her hair and dress were so homely. Scheana looked horrible. I don't know what she's done to herself, but her face is gaunt and her teeth are huge. She's lost a lot of weight.

I am going to have to watch this again b/c I was totally distracted by how terrible everyone looked.

[BogoGog24]

Honestly thought they all looked terrible, makeup wise, clothing wise, or both.

[Silo]

On WWHL the Who Looked Best at the reunion poll:

Ariana 37%

Kristen 22%

Lala and Scheana 13%

Everyone else got 5, 3, or 2%.

Edited March 22, 2016 by Silo

[WhosThatGirl]

Do they get professional make up done for these shows? It never looks like they do. 

 

ETA: The WWHL poll, Arainia looked AWFUL.

Edited March 22, 2016 by WhosThatGirl

[mbaywife123]

LaLa looked like a 1980's Bratz doll or Scarlet from Willy Wonka before chewing the gum.

James still reminds me of Gollum.

LVP's blouse looked like some modern day scarlet letter nightmare.

Jax is a greasy, bloated jackass. His smell almost comes thru the TV.

Katie"s hair was confused, up,down or in between? What a mess!

Ariana was trying to channel Rapunzel the early years.

FI described his "look" the best on his own.

Scheana's is slowly morphing into Juliana Ransic.

Kristin, who cares.

Schwartz, 70's disco or low budget Miami Vice.

[racked]

They barely showed Ariana so maybe that's why people confusedly thought she looked best.

[rustyspigot]

If I had a choice between drugs or Scheana I might be a little conflicted.

[Neeners]

Either something drastically changed, or I am the most unobservant person ever, but Scheana's head is 100% shaped like an alien. Seriously. Is it because she lost weight? It was very distracting! And Shay has major problems making eye contact with people, doesn't he? Low self esteem? Lying? Shy? Or is he afraid Scheana is going to probe him later?

[Ubiquitous]

On WWHL the Who Looked Best at the reunion poll:

Ariana 37%

Kristen 22%

Lala and Scheana 13%

Everyone else got 5, 3, or 2%.

WHAT?!?!?! You aren't pulling our legs, are you?

 

When I first saw Shwartzie I thought he had his pants hiked halfway up to his chest.

 

In addition to successful businesswoman Lisa Vanderbucks saying silly things that I cannot recall right now, she looked like an undead 1980's working girl, complete with one of those big limp necktie/bow things.

 

Lala looked like she spat out her everlasting gnobsnacker just in time.

 

Arianna looked like that "let it go" girl but her constant sneering and eye rolling betrayed her.

 

Either something drastically changed, or I am the most unobservant person ever, but Scheana's head is 100% shaped like an alien. Seriously. Is it because she lost weight? It was very distracting! And Shay has major problems making eye contact with people, doesn't he? Low self esteem? Lying? Shy? Or is he afraid Scheana is going to probe him later?

It sounded to me like Shay is very introverted or shy. I thought he said at some point he preferred staying home than going out and partying with Schema.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Oh man, FI calling Satan Andy, "dude"?  That's your boss, moron.  Well, I don't know that for sure -- but I strongly suspect it.  He gave FI a constipated look.  Not a good idea to upset and/or disrespect Satan Andy.  I expected FI to start jumping up & down & throwing a tantrum, while denying so strenuously how Kristen still so obviously gets under his skin.  FI, what in the fuckety fuck color base are you wearing?  He looked like a Trumpy orange.

 

And sheesh, Schemer turning on the leaky eyes when she was being called out on giving endless booze to boozehound Shay?  Oy.  Poor Shay.  He looked & sounded drunk/stoned/zonked-out & who can blame him -- being married to Schemer?  Wonder if Eddie is watching & soooo glad he dodged that bullet by dumping her.

 

Hey Ariana, you snot, nobody needed your judgey eye-rolls when poor Shay admitted to the extent of his pill-popping.  OK, maybe I'm sympathizing with Shay more cuz he's stuck with Schemer than for being a pill-popper or boozehound.  But still, fuck off, Ariana -- way to kick at someone in a sensitive moment.  You suck, hun.

Edited March 22, 2016 by ScoobieDoobs

[OnceSane]

And sheesh, Schemer turning on the leaky eyes been she was being called out on giving endless booze to boozehound Shay?  Oy.  Poor Shay.  He looked & sounded drunk/stoned/zonked-out & who can blame him -- being married to Schemer?  Wonder if Eddie is watching & soooo glad he dodged that bullet by dumping her.

Eddie may have dodged a Scheana-sized bullet but he stepped on a Leanne Rimes landmine. I think Shay got the better deal.

[yourmomiseasy]

Poor dumb Lala is stuck in a vicious circle with the makeup.  Her skin looks like shit, so she trowels it on and that undoubtedly causes her skin to look even more like shit,  Her poor face needs to breathe.  

 

I can't decide if Scheana looks like a bug or an alien.  Maybe an alien bug.

 

Katie's styling was terrible.  Not a good advertisement for her blog. 

 

Lisa really needs to rethink wearing that shirt ever again.  She should just throw it out, not even donate it to that charity she gives all her old clothes to.

 

I'm not saying Ariana looked good, but look at the other options.  

 

Yeah, I've only got shallow shit for now.  I did enjoy everyone calling Scheana out on saying Shay was drunk just to get her way.

[bosawks]

Does Ariana spend all her off show time sucking lemons to perfect that face?

[charmed1]

I loathe Jenny McCarthy, but on WWHL, she said she does believe Lala is a hooker. I just don't buy Lala's story. She claims she "didn't spread her legs," but didn't really say what she actually did.

[BogoGog24]

I honestly thought Ariana's hair and makeup was well done, it was just the dress or whatever the hell that thing she was wearing that looked terrible. Hair and makeup wise I would say she looked the best (not that the bar is high there, considering Lala's and some of the others). Katie probably looked second best but that's probably mostly because I think she has the most natural beauty probably of any of them. Scheana's face looked over contoured, like way too gaunt and cheeks far too sunken. Lala just looked awful. Kristen's hair and makeup was ok but tbh I don't think she's that naturally gorgeous to begin with, so it looked good for Kristen but not that great in general. 

 

Didn't they insinuate before that Lala gives BJs on these "trips" she goes on? That's what I assumed when she was saying she doesn't "spread her legs," but of course she never said anything else. Yeah methinks she does do BJs though. 

Edited March 22, 2016 by BogoGog24

[Dev]

How nasty is Ariana to say Kristen was squatting in TOM'S APARTMENT OF TEN YEARS!  Girl, if I'm getting the story straight, you hooked up (wait.. you can't say that, it's "KISSED") with Tom way before they broke up, inappropriately texted him at all hours, and had him over your place until 8 in the morning.  Then you want to say that "through no fault of your own" people think you are a cheater. OK. 

 

Sandoval: "Five and a half years!"  OK, sure.  

 

I have no idea how Ariana keeps winning the WWHL polls.  She had her signature struggle braid and terrible contouring.  Yet, best look?  I don't think so.  

 

I have no interest in Lala one way or the other. She's just there.  Her trips don't interest me. Her frequently brought up mom doesn't interest me.  Her fight with Kristen doesn't interest me.  Neither of them want James, so why do I care?  She shouldn't even be there because I don't think she ever really worked at Sur or is friends with any of these people.  

Edited March 22, 2016 by Dev

[Primetimer]

The first part of the Vanderpump Rules reunion features much effort made toward exonerating Scheana's enabling behavior and nailing Kristen for being...Kristen.

Read the story

[gunderda]

Sometimes it's possible for people to quit drugs cold turkey.  Is it likely? no, but possible.  My friend's husband was a heavy drinker, getting drunk almost every night. They got into an awful fight which led to her leaving for a couple of days.  He actually told her that if he drinks again then she needs to divorce him.  He quit cold turkey and hasn't drank in over a year. 

Do I believe Shay? I don't know - but hopefully he's being truthful.  It would do them both some good to attend meetings.  But my friend's husband refused to go to AA too because it was too religious based. 

 

At least Scheana acknowledged that she was completely ignorant about addiction.

[RHJunkie]

Does Kristen have a single redeeming quality about her? At all? How can you honestly sit there and complain about Tom and James being unfaithful when

1. You were unfaithful to Tom with one of his best friends no less

2. You cheated on your 'new boyfriend' with James...in his car

Kristen needs a mirror held up to her face but I think she's still too dumb and shallow to realize that her failed relationships are not because she deserves better. She attracts exactly the type of men that mirror the type of woman she is. She's delusional, untrustworthy and lacks any type of self awareness for her own actions. Classic case of 'do as I say, not as I do'.

[Duke2801]

As much as I despise James, I was sort of enjoying him and Tom teaming up to talk about how awful Kristen is. I loved Tom's dig: "As more time goes on, the more men you'll find out that she slept with while you were together." 

 

Kristen did, however, probably look the best out of all these ladies. But that's not saying much.  I'm not even gonna touch Lala because you all have done a great job already.  Violet from Willy Wonka indeed!

 

Lisa was looking rough. That blouse was tragic. Her face? Eeegads--STAWP with the fillers/procedures, woman. She is seriously starting to venture into Adrian Maloof territory. 

 

Neeners, on 21 Mar 2016 - 11:20 PM, said:Neeners, on 21 Mar 2016 - 11:20 PM, said:

Either something drastically changed, or I am the most unobservant person ever, but Scheana's head is 100% shaped like an alien. Seriously. Is it because she lost weight? It was very distracting! And Shay has major problems making eye contact with people, doesn't he? Low self esteem? Lying? Shy? Or is he afraid Scheana is going to probe him later?

 

I said the same thing!  The difference between Scheanna's face/head in Seasons 1 and 2 to now is startling. 

 

And yes she 1000% turned on those waterworks to deflect from answering Andy about her "13th" AA step that she implemented on Shay: Thou must only drink to get buzzed and have fun.  Unless it's a special occasion and *I* want to get blitzed. THEN it's, like, totally ok for thou to drink excessively.

Edited March 22, 2016 by Duke2801

[ghoulina]

Okay, let's start with the superficial. 

 

Lisa looked like Little Bo Peep. 

 

Katie's hair was very awkward. Like her niece was playing with it and didn't finish. 

 

Arianna scared me and made me think of that horror story about the woman with the ribbon around her neck. Eeek. 

 

Love that Sandoval owned his ridiculousness - "It's like Don Johnson and Colonel Sanders had a baby". Bahahahaa!

 

Now, if only Lala could own that HER look was as if Violet Beauregarde and an Oompa Loompa had a baby. And fried its hair and spackled ten pounds of mauve makeup on it. 

 

 

 

 

So, what was up with Lisa defending Jax? "He's a good employee". Wait, what? Do good employees steal, fight on the clock, bang on the clock, and insist customers only order the basic drinks that he can halfway make? She must mean he's good for the SHOW, not the restaurant. 

 

I love when they show flashbacks. James - "See this? You'll never have this again!!!" Until you're banging on a Beemer, that is. 

 

I really can't with Scheana, pleading ignorance about addiction. I don't think it takes firsthand experience to know that if someone is struggling with dependency, you don't suggest they "just drink enough to not be boring". I would just appreciate her a lot more if she could own that she was being selfish. 

 

Also, when Shay was defending himself to Lisa and said he had to choose between Scheana and drugs, was I the only one yelling, "DRUGS!"? 

 

The Kristen-Tom-Ariana shit is just played out and old. Quit fighting over whose friends are whose. I know being around an ex is awkward, but at this point everyone has banged everyone, so just shut up and move on. 

[bosawks]

I don't know, listening to these chuckleheads argue about infidelity is sublimely ridiculous.

[TattleTeeny]

Hey Ariana, you snot, nobody needed your judgey eye-rolls when poor Shay admitted to the extent of his pill-popping.  OK, maybe I'm sympathizing with Shay more cuz he's stuck with Schemer than for being a pill-popper or boozehound.  But still, fuck off, Ariana -- way to kick at someone in a sensitive moment.  You suck, hun.

 

It came off to me more as, "OMG, all those pills" (even though five or six a day doesn't sound that crazy to me).

[bichonblitz]

 

So, what was up with Lisa defending Jax? "He's a good employee". Wait, what? Do good employees steal, fight on the clock, bang on the clock, and insist customers only order the basic drinks that he can halfway make? She must mean he's good for the SHOW, not the restaurant. 

 

I know! Shut up, Lisa. You lost a million points with me defending Jax.  She looked so dated in that redic blouse. The camera close ups did her no favors, either. Stop with the botox, already. Her face doesn't move. 

What was with the flashback of the last ep with Lisa telling Jax that he and Stassi belonged together? WTF?? I'm sure Brittney enjoyed hearing that.....

Edited March 22, 2016 by bichonblitz

[WhosThatGirl]

None of these people have a leg to stand on when it comes to talking about infidelity. And this is just based on the stuff we know, from the show. I'm about 90% sure that there are things we will never hear about it because they don't want it known. They are all liars and cheaters. Maybe not Katie, but the jury is somewhat out on that one. So, yeah, when they call Kristen a bad person, I mean, it's kind of like, "Aren't you all bad people?" even Stassi can't say anything because as we all know from Bravo's uncensored special last week, she was hooking up with Frank while technically with Jax. So, yeah.

 

I don't know. It's not like I would ever be friends with Kristen, but it made me mad that pretty much all of the people at the reunion ganged up on her. The only person who didn't was Katie. I think what kind of makes me mad is that Lisa, the grown up adult of this show -and I say "grown up adult" even though all these people are adults, I feel like Lisa in a sense should be the more grown up one, I can't explain  it, hopefully you guys get what I mean- puts gasoline on the fire re: anything with Kristen because she hates her. It's painfully obvious. And I know, she has reasons to dislike her but I hate her presence at the reunions for these reasons when she gets into the cast members business and with Kristen, she's right there along with them. 

[pbutler111]

The way Lisa went after Shay made me think that there's something we don't know about her life that's fueling this animosity toward someone she perceives to be a drug addict. Didn't her son do a stint in rehab? All of that wasn't about defending Scheana. (And am I the only one who thinks the only reason Scheana is with Shay is because she thought their names sounded adorable together?)

[bichonblitz]

None of these people have a leg to stand on when it comes to talking about infidelity. And this is just based on the stuff we know, from the show. I'm about 90% sure that there are things we will never hear about it because they don't want it known. They are all liars and cheaters. Maybe not Katie, but the jury is somewhat out on that one. So, yeah, when they call Kristen a bad person, I mean, it's kind of like, "Aren't you all bad people?" even Stassi can't say anything because as we all know from Bravo's uncensored special last week, she was hooking up with Frank while technically with Jax. So, yeah.

 

 

They have all cheated, haven't they? I guess basically that's what this show boils down to. Who's cheating on who and when, where, how. They're all getting a little long in the tooth to be acting like 22 yr olds. Except James, who actually is. 

[ghoulina]

The way Lisa went after Shay made me think that there's something we don't know about her life that's fueling this animosity toward someone she perceives to be a drug addict. Didn't her son do a stint in rehab? All of that wasn't about defending Scheana. (And am I the only one who thinks the only reason Scheana is with Shay is because she thought their names sounded adorable together?)

 

Yes, Max supposedly had a drug problem and was sent away to one of those ranch type places in the boonies. That's why I'm so bothered by how hard she came down on Shay. She should know first hand how hard addiction is and be a bit more sympathetic, IMO.