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S22.E07: The Guy Who Acts A Fool

OnceSane

By OnceSane
in America's Next Top Model [V]

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ShadowSixx

ShadowSixx

(edited)

Geez Kelly when did Justin and Mame confirm that they were a couple and made it official to you?? Just talking out her ass and needs to stop wearing all that damn black, she's a far cry from a Morticia Addams. She's more like Uncle Fester's understudy. 

 

Bello is a horrible actor and even Hadassah didn't even know what was going on. Bello and all his talk about being an actor, GTFO. Mikey was just whooshing his hair like he's in some shampoo commercial. Devin was also a joke, IDK where he got comedy out of the script. Of course Lacey would win as I doubt that the role would call for a deaf character unfortunately. I don't blame Ashley for being pissed off cause I sure as hell would be, she should have at least gotten a 7 instead of a 6 score for the challenge.

 

Yu talking about unprofessionalism is laugable.

 

"Take the hair away from your boom, boom, boom". Who in the fuck is gonna know what that means? Tyra quit trying to make your Tyra-isms happen, it's not going to happen. Nobody who makes film or commercial is going to pick that up and use it to tell male actors to take things off their boom boom boom. First thing that will come to people's mind is the Black Eyed Peas song. 

 

Tyra when is Kelly rocking any other color besides black? Not only does Tyra's boyfriend take crappy blurry photos but his commercials are awful and I mean awful in a way that they shouldn't speak. The commercials wouldn't be bad if the models didn't speak, especially that boom crap. Most perfume/cologne type commercials, the models for the most part don't speak. It's usually done by voice over and there's a reason why. Models aren't that great at acting.

 

Let me also add that Tyra's boyfriend Erik Asla looks like Chef Gordon Ramsay. 

 

Lacey continues to rock, so she must be headed for a downfall down the road. Ashley just looked straight up pissed at panel, arms folded, standing at an angle. Devin should have been the one that went home and who told Tyra that Ashley was the one that laughed during the challenge? That was Devin. 

Edited by ShadowSixx
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rustyspigot

rustyspigot

They needed to teach useful sign language to the house like "Fierce" "Booty Tooch" "Smize" "I was in line for the phone!" "I had to use the toilet!" "Ghetto bitch!".

 

Tyra impersonating Devin in the  BOOM BOOM BOOM commercial had me crying in laughter. That was some funny shit.

 

I'm mystified by Tyra's fascination with Bello and his inability to discern fruit. Oh. Maybe that's why she likes him. He's insanely dumb.

 

Oh and BOOM... BOOM.......... BOOM...

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Stardancer Supreme

Stardancer Supreme

Geez Kelly when did Justin and Mame confirm that they were a couple and made it official to you?? Just talking out her ass and needs to stop wearing all that damn black, she's a far cry from a Morticia Addams. She's more like Uncle Fester's understudy. 

 

Bello is a horrible actor and even Hadassah didn't even know what was going on. Bello and all his talk about being an actor, GTFO. Mikey was just whooshing his hair like he's in some shampoo commercial. Devin was also a joke, IDK where he got comedy out of the script. Of course Lacey would win as I doubt that the role would call for a deaf character unfortunately. I don't blame Ashley for being pissed off cause I sure as hell would be, she should have at least gotten a 7 instead of a 6 score for the challenge.

 

Yu talking about unprofessionalism is laugable.

 

"Take the hair away from your boom, boom, boom". Who in the fuck is gonna know what that means? Tyra quit trying to make your Tyra-isms happen, it's not going to happen. Nobody who makes film or commercial is going to pick that up and use it to tell male actors to take things off their boom boom boom. First thing that will come to people's mind is the Black Eyed Peas song. 

 

Tyra when is Kelly rocking any other color besides black? Not only does Tyra's boyfriend take crappy blurry photos but his commercials are awful and I mean awful in a way that they shouldn't speak. The commercials wouldn't be bad if the models didn't speak, especially that boom crap. Most perfume/cologne type commercials, the models for the most part don't speak. It's usually done by voice over and there's a reason why. Models aren't that great at acting.

 

Let me also add that Tyra's boyfriend Erik Asla looks like Chef Gordon Ramsay. 

 

Lacey continues to rock, so she must be headed for a downfall down the road. Ashley just looked straight up pissed at panel, arms folded, standing at an angle. Devin should have been the one that went home and who told Tyra that Ashley was the one that laughed during the challenge? That was Devin. 

 

Well, that was fun.

 

Bello may have been horrible in that ridiculous commercial, but he didn't gay it out like Devin. Tyra was right when she spoke what he looked like: "Smell my Fierce biiiiiitttch!  Feel my Boom biiiiitch!  *laughing*  

 

I'm so glad Mame got a taste of the green eyed monster.  Justin looked all kinds of sexy; unfortunately it was wasted on Hadassah.

 

Ashley was featured so much in this episode that I knew she was going home.  Guess Gross Mikey will have to cuddle up with Devin or try to take Mame from Justin...

 

That commercial was ridiculous enough, but Nyle... Sigh.  How was Ashley supposed to respond to a man who doesn't speak?

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CraftyHazel

CraftyHazel

I really don't know what the judges were seeing in Devin this week...he looked and acted like a buffoon! I wasn't the biggest Ashley fan, but she was better than Devin this week. I also bet she saw the writing on the wall, hence the crossed arms and looking up and away from Tyra during Tyra's "So who goes home?" speech. I don't blame her.

I still love Lacey. She was my pre-season pick and she's still my favorite. I hope she and Nyle go far...in more ways than one!

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grumpypanda

grumpypanda

You got that bad ass boom baby. This episode was comedy gold. I was laughing my ass off at those commercials. Courtney and Bello looked like two decaying zombies that washed up on the beach.

Anyone else notice that Devin had a huge boner at the end of his commercial? I can't blame him though, Lacey is gorgeous. I don't know why Tyra gave her a haircut that practically covers half her face.

I'm glad to see Ashley go. She really looks rough as hell and I can't see her modeling anything but crack pipes.

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joanne3482

joanne3482

How was this an advertisement for deoderant? Maybe I'm old but that did not work for me and I found it uncomfortable. If I were the script writer on this "commercial" I would probably use a pseudonym.

 

I also agree with above, I'm sick of Tyra's weird Tyisms like Boom Boom Boom or bootie tooch.

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rustyspigot

rustyspigot

(edited)

 

How was this an advertisement for deoderant?

 

Because... BOOM BOOM BOOM silly. You know? For your abs. Don't question the Tyra!

 

Out of the Tyra haze for a moment it was a challenge where the models are threatened with hypothermia. Tyra must have some deep seeded fear or experience with cold (water/air).

Edited by rustyspigot
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PepperMonkey

PepperMonkey

Why in the eighth level of hell am I still watching this show? I am seriously worried about my sanity.

 

And what in the fuckity fuck was Tyra wearing at panel??? Miss J looked more fashion forward than she did tonight.

 

I'm ready for Courtney to go home. Was fine with Ashley leaving but between Devin and Ashley, I would have chosen Devin to go. Ashley was not the one making a total joke out of their audition. I think she was just trying to make the best of it. I wonder with Ashley gone now, if Mikey will try to make a serious move on Mame?

 

Hadassah is not attractive to me at ALL and even worse, for a modeling competition, she does not photograph well. She looks like a dying fish on nearly every photo and I am amazed she's still in the competition. I guess for drama purposes?

 

Is Boom Boom Boom deodorant a real thing, a made up thing for the show or a Tyra branded product? I have more questions than answers at this point.

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phoenix780

phoenix780

I didn't realize the product deodorant until panel.  I thought it was cologne, because the whole thing was like one of those ads from the 90s.  

 

Bello complaining about Courtney was weird.  I don't remember him doing so well during the shoot, though I guess he was fine in the finished product such as it was.   I also didn't get the complaints about Hadassah as background.  I thought she was fine, and I thought the female part was supposed to be background.  

 

Tyra mocking Devin is my 2nd favorite moment from her ever, right behind the obvious choice ("We were rooting for you...").  She was spot on, though it made me wonder why they didn't just pair him with a guy from jump street.  With him and Bello...I don't think I could ever believe them frolicking around on the beach with a woman in a romantic/sexual way.

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chocolatine

chocolatine

"Smell my fierce. Feel my boom" is worse than "Pot Ledum" and "I be like whoa!" put together. The videos all looked like SNL parodies. I don't understand how Bello got so much praise; him and Courtney kissing made me want to throw up. And then the fruit confusion at panel - even watching it on TV I could see clearly that it was a nectarine. This show has become The Onion of reality television.

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swankie

swankie

(edited)

I'm mystified by Tyra's fascination with Bello and his inability to discern fruit. Oh. Maybe that's why she likes him. He's insanely dumb.

 

 

I think Tyra is fascinated with his eyes and I'm just pulling at straws because he can't act or model so there must be some reason she keeps giving him high scores.  Of all of the guys, he had the most undefined abs or boom boom boom (can't believe I just typed that).  He's cute, but he looks too much like Stacey Dash and that makes me hate him.

Edited by swankie
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proserpina65

proserpina65

Lacey's clearly the front-runner here.  Still hoping for a Lacey/Nyle/Justin final 3.

 

Although Ashley has done nothing to impress me, I wish Devin had gone home because he annoys the fuck out of me.

 

Courtney photographs really well, but the way she looks in person, she'd never get booked, and she seems really fragile.  She needs to be sent home for her own mental health.

 

Mikey is skeevy.  Yuck.

 

Ty-Ty clearly has some kind of hard-on for Bello 'cause his commercial performance was pretty bad.  And I guess we're not getting any real photographers this cycle, just the awful, minimally talented boyfriend.  Too bad, since a few of these contestants are talented and deserve to work with someone who knows what they're doing.

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Qoass

Qoass

 

First thing that will come to people's mind is the Black Eyed Peas song.

 

I used to babysit some kids who said "boom" rather than "poop" which made watching this rather surreal for me.  I just kept imagining the show writers putting that script together while they laughed until they cried.

 

The producers must be praying that Nyle and Lacey fall in love so that the final two will be star-crossed lovers.

 

Devin cannot be gone too soon for me.  Not only is he obnoxious but he also tilts his head way back in his commentaries so his eyes practically disappear.  I can't stand to look at him.

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proserpina65

proserpina65

They needed to teach useful sign language to the house like "Fierce" "Booty Tooch" "Smize" "I was in line for the phone!" "I had to use the toilet!" "Ghetto bitch!".

 

Tyra impersonating Devin in the  BOOM BOOM BOOM commercial had me crying in laughter. That was some funny shit.

 

I'm mystified by Tyra's fascination with Bello and his inability to discern fruit. Oh. Maybe that's why she likes him. He's insanely dumb.

 

Oh and BOOM... BOOM.......... BOOM...

I was wondering what the sign for "Seriously, bitch?" was.  That would be the most useful information Nyle could be given.

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proserpina65

proserpina65

"Smell my fierce. Feel my boom" is worse than "Pot Ledum" and "I be like whoa!" put together. The videos all looked like SNL parodies. I don't understand how Bello got so much praise; him and Courtney kissing made me want to throw up. And then the fruit confusion at panel - even watching it on TV I could see clearly that it was a nectarine. This show has become The Onion of reality television.

"Smell my fierce" was a little too close to "smell the fart" for me to take any of that mess seriously.  Though I could watch Nyle do that commerical all day long. 

 

I'm near-sighted, and wasn't wearing my glasses while watching last night, and even I could tell that wasn't an apple.

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Jobiska

Jobiska

(edited)

For a while I thought it was "smell my fears" until someone enunciated it more clearly.  Which one way makes less sense, but in another makes more sense, because you don't smell adjectives.  "Smell my purple!"  "smell my forgetful!" (I also can't stand the signoff "Fierce and love."  What's wrong with "Fierceness?")

But nothing tops Pot Ledom as the most asinine catchphrase ever, IMHO.  The others have words used all wrong or ridiculously, but they are at least, y'know, words.

Courtney should have gone.  It wasn't fair to penalize Ashley as much for laughing as they did Devin.  He put her in an impossible position in the skit and sometimes you laugh out of frustration, helplessness, confusion.  She had no way to react to his off-script idiocy.  But of course if she had talked back when they criticized her laughing that would have been a black mark against her too.  She was doomed from the beginning of the episode.   

Edited by Jobiska
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ClareWalks

ClareWalks

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"Smell my fierce. Feel my boom." "Should I? Boom boom boom." "Triple action." "You got that bad-ass boom, baby." 

 

TYRA HAS LOST HER FUCKING MIND. OFFICIALLY. That was the worst script in the history of Top Model, and that is SAYING SOMETHING. Remember that ModelLand movie? GAAH. So much caps lock, you guys. SO MUCH CAPS LOCK.

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ShadowSixx

ShadowSixx

Are any of these models gonna be taken seriously after this show? That Boom Crap commercial could be the death nail in any modeling career. Tyra better figure out a way to bring in real photographers and directors to shoot commercials. What did Asla do, threaten Tyra by withholding sex if she doesn't put him on the show and give the remaining money in the ANTM budget to him. Tyra's net worth is estimated around $90 million, so is any of that money going towards the production and photoshoots for ANTM, because the show is looking mighty cheap.

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Nutjob

Nutjob

"Smell my fierce. Feel my boom." "Should I? Boom boom boom." "Triple action." "You got that bad-ass boom, baby." 

 

TYRA HAS LOST HER FUCKING MIND. OFFICIALLY. That was the worst script in the history of Top Model, and that is SAYING SOMETHING. Remember that ModelLand movie? GAAH. So much caps lock, you guys. SO MUCH CAPS LOCK.

This. SO MUCH THIS. Finally I just had to start viewing them like parodies, like chocolatine said upthread, or I would have thrown up.

 

That said, GOOD GOD, Nyle is sexy. I just... I mean... I can't even...

 

The other good thing that came from these "commercials" was, indeed, Tyra's impression of Devin trying to be manly and fierce. That was hilarious and made me giggle like a fool.

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swankie

swankie

(edited)

This is an acting challenge but Tyra told Ashley that her kissing scenes looked too real.  Say What Bitch?!  It's called good acting.  Duh!  That heffa just makes no sense.

 

"Smell my fierce" was a little too close to "smell the fart" for me to take any of that mess seriously.

 

 

It could have been worse.  The line could have been, "Smell my boom boom boom."  lol

Edited by swankie
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NutMeg

NutMeg

(edited)

They're not even filming for real products but that shoot was hilarious! In a so bad it's good way...

 

Courtney looks so-so in person but there are times when the camera really loves her. It's always a surprise to me how some awkward looking people can be gorgeous on pictures, while some extremely beautiful ones end up looking like they do on their Facebook pictures (i.e. NOT model like).

 

So far my only beef with this awesome train wreck of a season is that I can see who's eliminated and who's in the bottom two coming half an hour before it happens.

 

ETA: these lines they had to say were so bad I'm still laughing. Even the best actors couldn't have done them justice! 

Edited by NutMeg
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proserpina65

proserpina65

(edited)

ETA: these lines they had to say were so bad I'm still laughing. Even the best actors couldn't have done them justice!

 

And now I am imagining James Earl Jones and Malcolm McDowell reciting the lines from this commercial.

 

Of course, if JEJ tells you to smell his fierce, you smell his fierce asap.

Edited by proserpina65
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Nutjob

Nutjob

(edited)

And now I am imagining James Earl Jones and Malcolm McDowell reciting the lines from this commercial.

Can we get Christopher Walken to do a reading of it? That would be AMAZING.

 

"Smell... my fiERce...

 

Touch... my BOOm?"

Edited by Nutjob
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OakGoblinFly

OakGoblinFly

(edited)

I am over the Justin-Mame drama ....the cynic in me thinks that Ashley was eliminated so Mike could pursue Mame thereby upping the ante on the 'love' triangle.

 

For a moment I was fearful that we would lose Nyle since he spoke so much about feeling isolated ... glad that that wasn't the case.  I don't believe for one instance that the hampsters (other than Lacey was was trying to learn sign language earlier and has gone out of her way to include Nyle) had any great epiphany regarding Nyle and what it is like to be deaf in the hearing world.

Edited by OakGoblinFly
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proserpina65

proserpina65

The remaining models perform a 'Shakespearean play.' You know, the one about the stable boy who leaves a princess to marry a horse.

http://previously.tv/americas-next-top-model/americas-next-top-model-dreads-the-boards/"> Read the story

If only that fauxmercial had been for cologne, it might've made a teeny, tiny bit of sense (you know, in a Tyra kind of way); but it was actually for deodorant, somehow.  Not sure what abs have to do with deodorant, but as long as it's Nyle's abs I'm being asked to feel . . .

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NorthstarATL

NorthstarATL

So the BIG question is who is Mikey going to zero in on now, because we know from the first ep that he cannot sleep by himself? I am seriously hoping that Courtney's self esteem issues don't allow her to go there again, and that Mikey accidentally winds up sleeping  with Bello, and that they are kicked off because they cannot get their hair untangled.

Any deodorant advertisement that begins "smell my" has lost the point of deodorant. And that CW casting person was right about taking things seriously. Perhaps she might have steered them in the right direction by giving them a scene that didn't involve lighthearted bestiality? or is that a tease for next season's theme?

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anonymiss

anonymiss

I liked the commercials for the entertainment value. They really were like parodies of the Wicked Games video/Calvin Klein ads.

 

They ALL looked better in black and white and in movement. Justin looked like a model and a hot one at that. I finally saw it. And trailer park Mikey looked the part, too, without being able to see his brassy hair. 

 

Leave it to Courtney to be out of breath during the shot of them jogging on the beach.

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Surrealist

Surrealist

(edited)

I couldn't stop laughing in this episode. As in laughing AT Tyra and the contestants. Cringeworthy stuff, for real.

 

When they showed a clip of Courtney freezing on the beach, I've never seen her look more unattractive. Her teeth looked horizontal. She takes a good photograph or two, but I don't ever see her getting the chance to model. For money. Her teeth and her height will keep her out of getting many jobs.

 

I feel bad for her about the weight. I can't remember who brought up her family's socioeconomic situation, but I definitely think that factors the reason she's so thin. I think she's from a poor family. When I left my job and went into graduate school fulltime, I was on a limited budget. Very limited at times. Like ramen twice a day and glasses of water style of limited. After a while, you start to lose a lot of weight. While I never got skinny like Courtney, a few family members commented on my weight loss one Christmas Eve. So I don't think Courtney's starving herself, but I think she's used to going without food (or a lot of food) for periods of time. I don't think this competition is the right place for her, but the bashing (especially from Mikey) kind of infuriates me.

Edited by Surrealist
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milkyaqua

milkyaqua

I don't think this competition is the right place for her, but the bashing (especially from Mikey) kind of infuriates me.

 

I agree with this.  It was obvious especially last week when she commented about her back and her arms/lack of strength during the shoot.  She really should have been eliminated then.  Better yet, never cast and I know this show has no budget but the screening should have knocked her out of possible contention.

 

I'll enjoy watching Nyle, Lacey and possibly Justin but I'm tired of the rest of them and the lame shoots.  Oh sure, there's a germ of a good idea and then it all goes to hell as soon as Yu Tsai and Asla get involved.

 

Devin is annoying but I know he wasn't leaving.  He and Bello are in this for the long haul and Mikey is douche turned up to ten.  Even during this past fashion week when several of this cast walked the shows for Art Hearts Fashion, he couldn't help mugging and sticking out his tongue like some jerk off while on the runway.  I wish Ashley luck but she'll be lucky like a few of the other girls to get some music video work because I don't see modeling in her future.

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generate789

generate789

There are not many things that make me more irrationally angry than Fakespeare dialogue. People ... "wherefore" means "why" there are rules that dictate when "eth" or "est" gets added to the ends of verbs. Then again, I suppose I should be angriest at myself for expecting anything different.

Boom

Boom

Boom

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ExMathMajor

ExMathMajor

And now I am imagining James Earl Jones and Malcolm McDowell reciting the lines from this commercial.

 

Of course, if JEJ tells you to smell his fierce, you smell his fierce asap.

 

 

Can we get Christopher Walken to do a reading of it? That would be AMAZING.

 

 

Jeremy Irons? (just typing this has me laughing like a maniac). Or heck let's try George Clooney? Brad Pitt? Boom, boom, boom!!  

 

^^I am here for ALLLL of this. How do we make it happen?

 

I'd like to give an Emmy to those CWTV executives. Their acting like that challenge was in any way a serious audition was pretty impressive.

 

That said...GO LACEY! Both challenges! She is bringing me back to the 70s and I'm loving it.

 

If that deodorant commercial just had her (Devin edited out), Justin (Hadassah edited out), and Nyle and Ashley, I would have been able to tolerate it better. Actually, I just needed to see Nyle and Ashley. Actually, I just needed to see Nyle. *fanning myself* Speaking of Nyle and Ashley: Why didn't they make it completely silent (subtitled)? Didn't they just get a lesson in ASL from Nyle and his (adorable!) friend?

 

Of course Bello was going to knock Tyra's neon socks off: He has fake blue eyes and a partner (Courtney) who for the most part fades into the woodwork. Truthfully there wasn't a woman there who could have had chemistry with him. Nyle on the other hand...now THAT could have been hot.

 

Re Devin, to quote my dear old friend Carrie Bradshaw: We're so over, we need a new word for over. Sadly Tyra likes the drama you bring, so my dreams of your falling off a cliff back into model obscurity will have to wait yet another week...or two...because it looks like Courtney might finally be going home next?

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Oranaiche

Oranaiche

(edited)

"Smell my fierce" was a little too close to "smell the fart" for me to take any of that mess seriously. Though I could watch Nyle do that commerical all day long.

I was about to post this. All I could think about was one of them ripping a huge fart and it made the whole thing even more ridiculous than it already was.

I felt really bad for Nyle having to do the commercial without being able to talk. Obviously he wouldn't go out for a speaking commercial in real life.

Edited by Oranaiche
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NorthstarATL

NorthstarATL

I felt really bad for Nyle having to do the commercial without being able to talk. Obviously he wouldn't go out for a speaking commercial in real life.

Depends on how you look at it. I thought it gave him an advantage, both in not having to speak the inane script and in not having to hear it spoken!

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poppy-

poppy-

(edited)

Nyle making up a "just LOOK at my abs" sign for the word "boom" was brilliant.

Screw Tyra for making the female contesants feel up the pubic bones of their male competitors. Say "act sexy" and watch them make fools of themselves-- totally fair. Telling all of them to go as close to the zipper as they can- ew.

 

Is that anorexic model a meth head? What is wrong with her? It's hard to watch.

Edited by poppy-
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ShadowSixx

ShadowSixx

This is an acting challenge but Tyra told Ashley that her kissing scenes looked too real.  Say What Bitch?!  It's called good acting.  Duh!  That heffa just makes no sense.

 

So agree, either you make a kiss believable or not. IDK what the hell she was talking about with making a kiss look believable but not too real. She needs to STFU at times and maybe she can speak on the subject of acting when I see her win an Oscar, Emmy, Satellite, Academy, Golden Globe, Image, etc. Award for her acting. 

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rustyspigot

rustyspigot

 

The outtakes from the Boom Boom Boom commercial:

Bello getting crushed by that wave!

 

And Justin showing emotion other than "cool"..

 

I need someone to video mix up Devin's commercial with Jade's Covergirl commercial. There could be a random cut to Ann falling down on her roller skates put in as well.

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