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Pet Peeves: Aka Things That Make You Go "Gah!"


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Your Pet Peeves are your Pet Peeves and you're welcome to express them here. However, that does not mean that you can use this topic to go after your fellow posters; being annoyed by something they say or do is not a Pet Peeve.

If there's something you need clarification on, please remember: it's always best to address a fellow poster directly; don't talk about what they said, talk to them. Politely, of course! Everyone is entitled to their opinion and should be treated with respect. (If need be, check out the how to have healthy debates guidelines for more).

While we're happy to grant the leniency that was requested about allowing discussions to go beyond Pet Peeves, please keep in mind that this is still the Pet Peeves topic. Non-pet peeves discussions should be kept brief, be related to a pet peeve and if a fellow poster suggests the discussion may be taken to Chit Chat or otherwise tries to course-correct the topic, we ask that you don't dismiss them. They may have a point.

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6 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

The Dollar GeneralDollar Tree mgr must've been thrilled to make such a good sale. This is disgusting.

Stores don't make more money if one person buys everything than if a bunch of people buy just one. All letting someone buy the entire stock does is create bad feelings with their other customers. This isn't going to last forever, but how pissed off the (former) customers are, will. It's not in a store's best interest to let this happen.

Edited by GaT
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18 hours ago, ECM1231 said:

There was a video on Facebook the other day showing a woman in a warmer climate (palm trees visible), who had 2 metal dollies filled to the top with cardboard boxes. Inside the boxes were packages of toilet paper. She had cleared out the entire inventory of Dollar General or Dollar Tree. The woman filming her did so b/c she was greeted with an expletive when questioned.

It was here in Florida, in the county above mine. Because of course it was.

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This is such a specific peeve and probably wouldn't be an issue if I was in a better mood in general,, but here goes: people on FB are posting photos their reading lists and piles of books, which is not my peeve; I like seeing what people are reading. My annoyance is driven by all the comments saying shit like "Oh, tra la la...that would keep me busy for about a day." Sure, OK, fancy, special, unique* genius--a pile of 6 or 7 books would take you only 24 hours? Shut it, because (a) no, (b) I read as a job and I wouldn't be able to do that, and (c) judging by the writing skills in some of these comments, again I say no (I realize that makes me sound so mean, hahahha! I'm sorry). I mean, just come on. Again, I'm sorry--I am in a mood!

*The irony here being that they're all saying the same self-congratulatory thing. 

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I don't understand this thing that people do, sitting in their cars in apartment complex parking lots--mine and my boyfriend's (two different complexes)--and listening to their music at window-rattling levels. It's so incredibly rude. And currently, there's someone sitting outside my apartment (my bedroom overlooks the parking lot) with the key in their car's ignition (car isn't started) and the door open so the car is beeping nonstop. I have a sensory issue, so the repetitive beeping is driving me slowly insane. Take the key out of the ignition!

Edited by bilgistic
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14 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

I don't understand this thing that people do, sitting in their cars in apartment complex parking lots--mine and my boyfriend's--and listening to their music at window-rattling levels. It's so incredibly rude. And currently, there's someone sitting outside my apartment (my bedroom overlooks the parking lot) with the key in their car's ignition (car isn't started) and the door open so the car is beeping nonstop. I have a sensory issue, so the repetitive beeping is driving me slowly insane. Take the key out of the ignition!

OMG, @bilgistic, I know you don't live in my neighborhood, but this happens here, too!  I was out for a walk earlier today, and someone around the corner was doing just that.  I could hear it all the way up the block to my house.  So annoying.

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50 minutes ago, bilgistic said:

And currently, there's someone sitting outside my apartment (my bedroom overlooks the parking lot) with the key in their car's ignition (car isn't started) and the door open so the car is beeping nonstop. I have a sensory issue, so the repetitive beeping is driving me slowly insane.

Could you arrange for, say, a flowerpot to accidentally fall off your windowsill and land on the windshield?

Of course I will disavow all knowledge of your mission should you choose to accept it.

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I'm ordering most of my groceries online now and am either shopping from a store where they have in-house staff who do the picking or from a third party service.  The former tend to be amazing, but the latter?  Hit and miss.  Last night, I received an item which expires THAT DAY.  I could have eaten it had it come earlier, but the delivery arrived at 9 PM.  Kinda moot, no?  Dude could have at least LOOKED?  

 

Also, I'm staying away from social media (especially Facebook) when I can (can't always do this since I'm supposed to help promote a podcast I co-host).  I don't even know what's fake news and what's not anymore.  I'm only getting my COVID updates from news alerts on my phone.  

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I hate elder exploiters! Case in point, for the past several months there's been this real estate person who'd been calling my mother's number several times a day despite my mother having told them that she's not interested in selling the house. Yes, I'm sure the realtor thinks that my mother being an elderly widow is an easy target and that she can be eventually worn down- and  my mother has quit picking up the phone when this individual calls. Well, I HAD it, I saw the person on display and picked up the phone so when this person asked if 'Mrs. ___' was available, I told the realtor that Mrs.__  would never be available AND that the realtor needed to quit calling because this was ELDER ABUSE and hung up!  I REALLY hope this puts a stop to those calls!  The gall of that person doing that especially during these times! 

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4 hours ago, Blergh said:

I hate elder exploiters! Case in point, for the past several months there's been this real estate person who'd been calling my mother's number several times a day despite my mother having told them that she's not interested in selling the house. Yes, I'm sure the realtor thinks that my mother being an elderly widow is an easy target and that she can be eventually worn down- and  my mother has quit picking up the phone when this individual calls. Well, I HAD it, I saw the person on display and picked up the phone so when this person asked if 'Mrs. ___' was available, I told the realtor that Mrs.__  would never be available AND that the realtor needed to quit calling because this was ELDER ABUSE and hung up!  I REALLY hope this puts a stop to those calls!  The gall of that person doing that especially during these times! 

After my mom died, my dad's dementia became very apparent. He would whip out his credit card for anyone who called with a sob story. He was giving thousands of dollars to the RNC even though he was a lifelong democrat. I went to the bank and disputed all the charges and since I have his power of attorney, they removed the charges. It got so bad I had to have his phone number changed. I have never been so angry. I finally had to put him in care and he isn't bothered with constant demands for money.

Edited by peacheslatour
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Ordering groceries online. The person doing the shopping sent me a series of links which I didn't see until almost 30 minutes later because my phone didn't notify me, and I couldn't open them anyway. So frustrating. I ordered 6 things and 3 of them were out of stock, and none of them were toilet paper. How can you run out of feta? And the delivery window is tonight 9-11. If things are going to be out of stock anyway, I might as well risk infection and at least shop for the things they don't have at a decent hour.

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On ‎3‎/‎28‎/‎2020 at 11:30 AM, Blergh said:

I hate elder exploiters! Case in point, for the past several months there's been this real estate person who'd been calling my mother's number several times a day despite my mother having told them that she's not interested in selling the house. Yes, I'm sure the realtor thinks that my mother being an elderly widow is an easy target and that she can be eventually worn down- and  my mother has quit picking up the phone when this individual calls. Well, I HAD it, I saw the person on display and picked up the phone so when this person asked if 'Mrs. ___' was available, I told the realtor that Mrs.__  would never be available AND that the realtor needed to quit calling because this was ELDER ABUSE and hung up!  I REALLY hope this puts a stop to those calls!  The gall of that person doing that especially during these times! 

Me, too.  Before my grandfather died, people would call him trying to sell him things. Having had many "conversations" with my grandfather over the phone in the 2 years of so before he died, I can tell you it was darned obvious he couldn't understand a word you say.*  But my grandfather was always an agreeable guy so he'd just say yes to everything.  Luckily he lived in government subsidized housing and his rent came straight out of his social security and my mom bought his groceries, and she didn't feel a bit bad for any of those scammers that got stiffed when she helped him file for bankruptcy. 

*I actually told my mom I was going to stop calling because I figured it was pointless.  She told me not to because even though it was true he didn't understand me, he did know that it was me and he would always "brag" (her word, not mine) that I had called.  I thought that was so sweet.  Nobody else would ever brag about a phone call from me. 

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3 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Forking mouse just ran across my living room.  Now I have to go out and get traps and peanut butter (if I can find any -- I don't eat peanut butter).

I remember my husband coming into the house looking for my peanut butter (he never ate peanut butter). What he wanted it for was mice and chipmunks in the garage. I gave him the jar for his mousetraps and told him to keep it in his workbench drawer. I bought myself a new jar. Lol

Edited by rcc
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Having had many "conversations" with my grandfather over the phone in the 2 years of so before he died, I can tell you it was darned obvious he couldn't understand a word you say.*  But my grandfather was always an agreeable guy so he'd just say yes to everything. 

That is exactly like my dad. He's such an affable man he couldn't say no to anyone. 

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7 hours ago, Browncoat said:

Forking mouse just ran across my living room.  Now I have to go out and get traps and peanut butter (if I can find any -- I don't eat peanut butter).

I'm so sorry!  I had this problem in my apartment earlier this month, but my landlord couldn't get the exterminator in that week and I left that weekend for NJ(I live in nyc) and haven't been back since so I'll probably still have the problem whenever I eventually go back.  Actually in my case the thing was dead in my kitchen which may actually be worse since I have no idea what killed it.

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Or you could get a cat and name it Peanut Butter!  🐈

We live out in the country, and field mice getting into the house was a big problem.  We've since closed the gap around our garage doors, and not such a problem anymore.  But before we figured out where they were entering, we lost our beloved dog, and my husband said no more pets, he couldn't stand losing them.  I finally was able to persuade him to say yes to a cat.  She's like a mouse-catching machine!  And I pretend she's a dog, so everybody's happy.

 

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16 minutes ago, Browncoat said:

If a cat moved in, I'd have to move out.

Any cat I've ever known would be fine with that arrangement.

I'm kidding.  Sorry about the allergy.  Maybe you could get one of those horrible-looking hairless cats.  That'd probably scare the mice to death.

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7 minutes ago, Mondrianyone said:

Maybe you could get one of those horrible-looking hairless cats.  That'd probably scare the mice to death.

It would scare me to death, too!  Imagine waking up and seeing one of those first thing -- especially before I put my glasses on.  

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20 hours ago, Mondrianyone said:

Or you could get a cat and name it Peanut Butter!  🐈

We live out in the country, and field mice getting into the house was a big problem.  We've since closed the gap around our garage doors, and not such a problem anymore.  But before we figured out where they were entering, we lost our beloved dog, and my husband said no more pets, he couldn't stand losing them.  I finally was able to persuade him to say yes to a cat.  She's like a mouse-catching machine!  And I pretend she's a dog, so everybody's happy.

 

We used to have a cat named Silver. He was super smart and also kind of a smart ass. We live on the lake so we occasionally get rats. Once when we went to Europe for a few weeks we came back and he yelled at us for a solid hour. The next day he killed a rat. and the day after that he killed another. Five rats in five days, it was a record. It was like "Leave me alone will you? I'll show what I can do!"

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3 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

I don't like surprises, and I don't like it when people pop in to visit without being given the heads up first.

😮 I hope you mean in normal times, and not that people are popping in at your house recently,  instead of social distancing?

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Yeah, I certainly hope it's not happening now!

But I don't understand why it ever happens.  This came up in conversation with my mom's cousin many years ago, and when she said she enjoys when people unexpectedly stop by, I was gobsmacked.  I've never known anyone to regard the pop-in as anything other than the rude intrusion it is, and I really can't wrap my mind around thinking it's okay to just turn up at someone's door without asking and expect to be welcomed with open arms.

My mom, who had a visiting friend with her, once phoned me from the car - meaning she was on "speakerphone" - to say they'd just had lunch in the area and wanted to know if they could stop by so Friend could see all the work I'd done on my house.  At least they didn't just show up, but the hell?!  I barely know this woman; show off your own projects!  If she's into home renovation projects herself, tell me in advance she'll be visiting and ask if I might like to show her what I've done.  Then I can plan, and invite you over at a convenient time.

I replied, "Remember when I was a kid, and you'd admonish me for asking you if a friend could stay for dinner or spend the night in front of said friend?"  And, no, I didn't let them come over; I said hello the friend, and hoped she was having a nice visit, but I was not prepared for company at the time.

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15 hours ago, icemiser69 said:

And yet, my best friend gave out my number to the reunion committee.  

I never had any interest in school reunions either.  And yet my DAD gave my address to the elementary school committee AND the high school committee.  I would have been safe otherwise since I had moved to the other side of the country!  Luckily at that time I moved a lot.

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What is really amazing, and annoying, is how my college (a major California university where I earned my undergraduate degree a bazillion years ago) keeps finding me, despite several major moves and a legal name change (when I married) to ask for donations, like they need it! Their alumni association must have some incredible connections inside the DMV or somewhere because I have not escaped them sending me regular pleading letters. No, I say - the answer is no! Go away! Stop killing trees to send me begging letters!

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Whoever was organizing our ten-year high school reunion went into full-on stalker mode.  Someone called my parents' house to ask for my address, and my mom said no, she would not give out that information, and she happened to know I had zero interest in attending a reunion, but she'd be happy to pass a message along anyway.  Then someone called the mom of one of my best friends, who's a teacher at the school, to ask for my address!  Thankfully, she also respected my privacy and said that's not information she's comfortable divulging, so no one ever got my address.

By our twentieth, someone would have easily been able to find my work contact info online, but thankfully we never had another reunion. 

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4 minutes ago, Rose Quartz said:

I went to my twentieth reunion and within half an hour everyone had slipped back into their high school cliques.  That cured my of any great desire to attend future reunions.

Same at all of the ones I attended.  But I suspect that I was only invited to any reunion because my mother was a favorite teacher, and they wouldn't invite her without inviting me.  Until Facebook, which I am not on, but my mother is -- all invitations go through there now. My classmates finally found a way to exclude me politely! 

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I went to my 10th and skipped the rest.  Anybody I want to speak to from those days can be spoken to on Facebook.  In fact, I am friends with people on there that were in my graduating class but never had a conversation with back then,  I do enjoy going down the rabbit hole and looking at everyone's pictures whether we're friends on there or not ("Wow, she looks middle-aged...whoa, we are middle-aged!").   The only way I'd have been enticed to go to a reunion at this point in the game would have been to see my 11th grade crush.  But, unfortunately, he was killed in a car accident in our twenties so that takes the fantasy out of that.

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(edited)

If there was a 10 year high school reunion for my class, I never heard about it. I honestly don't know that high school reunions are or will be as much of a thing among my generation or younger ones, what with social media being what it is nowadays and all. 

My mom's high school class was planning a reunion for this summer, but now with the virus, that's looking pretty up in the air as to whether or not it'll get pushed back or happen at all. 

Edited by Annber03
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(edited)

I liked my reunions. Then again, I am still friends with a big bunch of these people anyway, so I guess reunions just seem like larger versions of our normal social events. 

Awww, I remember social events, haha!

Here's a peeve: this stupid virus ruined my plans to do the cheesiest thing ever! A Neil Diamond cover band was scheduled to play at the KoC right next to my condo, damn it! That would have been fun (and probably funNY).

Edited by TattleTeeny
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I went to my 10th year reunion, realized why I was so happy to graduate, and have ignored all invitations to the 20th. It was supposed to be this year, but I doubt it will happen. I wouldn't have gone anyway, like others have said, I keep up with the people I choose to through social media 

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Ugh, you guys, I cannot believe that the people on social media who tend to deny actual science  (because a certain person tells them to) are the very same ones posting memes that gargling with vinegar can stop COVID in its tracks. So, doctors and scientists=fake news, but homemade meme with terrible grammar and spelling=cure?

Also, it is very sunny and crazy windy where I am (North Jersey). Not 2 minutes ago, we had darkness and a snow-hail combo that was coming down so fast that it looked fake--especially with those pink-flower trees in bloom behind it!

Edited by TattleTeeny
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Perhaps people are turning to shady ways to generate income because I am getting spam emails like it's the year 2000. It's not been this bad in years and years, and just started in the last couple of weeks.

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1 hour ago, TattleTeeny said:

That reminds me of a peeve I have: an online glasses site I use sends promo emails every day! How the hell often do they think I need new glasses?!

There are a couple of flower bulb companies that send me six or seven emails a day. I should block them.

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I've noticed a marked increase in spam e-mails in the past few weeks. I guess with most everyone stuck at home, they don't have anything else to do but spam the rest of us. I probably delete/block a few dozen a day.

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I cannot stand to hear this condescending comment during Q & A sessions: "That's a good question". What? You mean that previous question was stupid, or a waste of your time? I'm cranky, been stuck in the house too long, and just wanting to grumble & bite an ankle or two. But I'm hearing that asinine comment a tad too much these days 😾

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31 minutes ago, annzeepark914 said:

I cannot stand to hear this condescending comment during Q & A sessions: "That's a good question". What? You mean that previous question was stupid, or a waste of your time? I'm cranky, been stuck in the house too long, and just wanting to grumble & bite an ankle or two. But I'm hearing that asinine comment a tad too much these days 😾

Lol. I usually understand “that’s a good question “ to mean “I don’t know the answer to that. Let me stall a little bit...” 

edited to add - to be fair, sometimes it really is a question that there isn’t really an easy or obvious answer to. Seems like there are a lot of those these days. 

Edited by SoMuchTV
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2 minutes ago, SoMuchTV said:

Lol. I usually understand “that’s a good question “ to mean “I don’t know the answer to that. Let me stall a little bit...” 

"That's a good question. That's a reeeeaaaaal goood question.... Real good..."

My response to "That's a good question" is "That's a bad answer." I think it's funny. No one else seems to agree.

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14 hours ago, annzeepark914 said:

I cannot stand to hear this condescending comment during Q & A sessions: "That's a good question". What? You mean that previous question was stupid, or a waste of your time? I'm cranky, been stuck in the house too long, and just wanting to grumble & bite an ankle or two. But I'm hearing that asinine comment a tad too much these days 😾

LOL. I always thought people used that phrase as a stalling technique, to give themselves a minute to think through their response. 

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I began saying ”That’s a great question!” because I wanted to encourage questions, because without them, I wouldn’t know what the students didn’t know.
I like to think I always immediately followed ”That’s a great question!” with a dazzling, insightful answer. 

But having now read all of these posts, if I was still teaching, I would seriously consider not wasting precious seconds by exclaiming  ”That’s a great question!”

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On 4/17/2020 at 7:46 AM, shapeshifter said:

I began saying ”That’s a great question!” because I wanted to encourage questions, because without them, I wouldn’t know what the students didn’t know.
I like to think I always immediately followed ”That’s a great question!” with a dazzling, insightful answer. 

But having now read all of these posts, if I was still teaching, I would seriously consider not wasting precious seconds by exclaiming  ”That’s a great question!”

I say "that's a great question" when I'm training, for the same reasons you use it. Without questions I wouldn't know what they wouldn't know. I encourage ALL questions and I want people to know I'm excited for questions, not put off by them.

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18 minutes ago, theredhead77 said:

I say "that's a great question" when I'm training, for the same reasons you use it. Without questions I wouldn't know what they wouldn't know. I encourage ALL questions and I want people to know I'm excited for questions, not put off by them.

Exactly.
Maybe not all “Great question!” responses are equal. 
Anyway, to all Pet Peeve posters above who don’t like the “Great question!” response, what do you think of, instead, when the question is repeated for those who might not have heard. That alone demonstrates that the question was heard by the instructor/trainer/lecturer and valued, doesn’t it?

 

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29 minutes ago, shapeshifter said:

Exactly.
Maybe not all “Great question!” responses are equal. 
Anyway, to all Pet Peeve posters above who don’t like the “Great question!” response, what do you think of, instead, when the question is repeated for those who might not have heard. That alone demonstrates that the question was heard by the instructor/trainer/lecturer and valued, doesn’t it?

 

I've experienced this situation and the facilitator usually said something like, "Did everyone hear the question?"  If not, he or she repeated the person's question and then answered it (or opened the topic up for discussion).

Edited by annzeepark914
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