S09.E13: Jill's Wedding

[GEML]

Any time the Dillard's had that is just about them is never going to be shown on camera. It's not their show, and I get the impression that aside from Derrick, they like it that way. So we have no idea what time they have, or really how close they are in a "we need to spend quiet time together" kind of way. But given how recreated everything is, I think it's safe to say Derrick saw his mother before Jill came in, as Cathy focused on Jill in that moment - that tells me she had a previous moment to have focused on her son.

Just curious - where did the comment about Jim Bob making the event back at the house a potluck come from? I'm just wondering how likely that would be, considering a lot of those families would have been on buses. Now, it might have meant that they pitched in and helped make the food (and I'm betting some of those early arrivals were the cookie bakers and volunteers) but it just doesn't seem feasible to me, even by Duggar standards to do pot luck when people are living out of a bus or a tent or in their guest house. Am I missing something?

It was my understanding that volunteers were all included at the rehearsal dinner as part of the thank you (that was when they scooped the nasty melted ice cream) and I'm betting many of them also were the friends invited back to the house for real food.

Edited October 31, 2014 by GEML

[Sew Sumi]

One bone of contention about the reception back at the TTH: these people weren't all their "very best friends." A video surfaced not long after the wedding (it's how we got the first glimpses of that horrible duct tape dress). In the video, a woman asked Boob to tell her husband that she was expecting. Boob had to ask what his name was.

 

Such "close" friends. Although in this case, I imagine it was a couple who used A Mommy's Butterfly for prior midwifery services, so the wife likely knew VEnessa and, tangentially, Jill. That said, I doubt the couple are THAT close to Jill.

 

eta: I saw some candid pics from the "real" reception. A guest posted a shit ton of TTH reception pics on FB but has since locked it down; apparently the "no pictures" edict wasn't as strict since TLC didn't film it. From her pics, it appeared that a lot of cooking went down at the TTH that day. That means many, many women probably didn't even get to see the actual wedding since they were preparing for this party.

Edited October 31, 2014 by Sew Sumi

[cereality]

The bridesmaids and groomsmen standing next to each other looked dumb. During the vows the camera panned to Derick and behind him was Jessa. I think it makes more sense to look behind the groom and see his side and look behind the bride and see hers. I don't know why Michelle came up with this.

 

As for the running off, I still don't get it. Where were they going and how much time did they think they were going to get? I mean maybe they'd get 5-10 min max until the rest of the bridal party made its way out and followed, though in this case they got much less bc everyone took their lead and ran. It seemed like that was Derick's doing, and I still don't know what he wanted. I mean someone who hasn't had sex before can't get a quickie done in 5 min -- undressing and pulling up the skirt will take that long. If he just wanted to kiss -- I'm not suggesting they had to do it right by the doors but they were official -- they could have moved off to the side someplace behind a column and kissed without doing a 50 yr dash first. And they have lots of things to talk about, but I'm not sure that it's necessary to have the -- how many kids do you REALLY want; can we please use birth control; are you really going to work now that you got a husband -- conversations right in that moment. Even when the camera got in there and captured Derick with his arms around Jill, he said something about "being alone" or "no chaperone" but I still don't get what he expected. I don't recall any Bates couple sprinting out the door like that and they had the same no kissing/no sex rules.

[GEML]

I will say that when you have as many adults in the family, you really could invite 300 " very close friends" and any given adult may not really know who that person is. That's kind of normal at a wedding - between people Michelle and JB know, Grandma Duggar knows, any from the groom's side knows, any Jill knows, any that were included because this is a chance for the young people to mingle with like-minded families for future courtships....there is a lot of people that don't overlap.

[3girlsforus]

Do we know for sure that this wedding planner was actually a professional wedding planner? A lot of churches that host weddings have a member whose role is 'wedding planner' and you work with that person for things related to the church because they are familiar with the specifics of the facilities, the rules of the church, where everything is etc but that person is not making a living as a wedding planner.  If people want someone to organize the whole thing they would get an outside wedding planner then deal with the church's "wedding planner" for information and details they need to know. 

[Joe Jitsu913]

Do we know for sure that this wedding planner was actually a professional wedding planner? A lot of churches that host weddings have a member whose role is 'wedding planner' and you work with that person for things related to the church because they are familiar with the specifics of the facilities, the rules of the church, where everything is etc but that person is not making a living as a wedding planner. If people want someone to organize the whole thing they would get an outside wedding planner then deal with the church's "wedding planner" for information and details they need to know.

Sierra is not a professional wedding planner. She is a friend of the Duggars aka fundie.

[Sew Sumi]

Sierra (Dominguez) is a housewife with 4 kids (both easily verifiable via her FB). She also baked the lopsided cake. As we also know, VEnessa is a midwife. When would she realistically have time to plan weddings (and what if a client decided to go into labor that day?).

 

I feel pretty safe in saying that neither woman is a wedding planner by profession, although SIerra may have coordinated a MUCH smaller wedding or two in the past. Or who knows?  Maybe since she was already baking the cake maybe she just volunteered herself to Jill? I'm curious what experience VEnessa had that made Jill think she'd be an effective Organizer of the Masses.

Edited October 31, 2014 by Sew Sumi

[GEML]

One thing I hadn't realized - Josh wasn't a groomsman. I had figured Anna was selected as a bridesmaid because Josh was a groomsman and they didn't want a married woman walking with another man. But that wasn't the case - well sort off, given the silly show at the end.

But I have a theory on Anna being included. I'm betting that Jana and Anna have become pretty close over the past year. Jana has spent a lot of time in DC, and Jill had been focused on other things. And it seemed to me that the relationship between Jill and Jana had cooled a little bit, which is often what happens when someone gets involved and married. I wondered if maybe Jill wasn't little jealous of Jana being close to Anna which is how Anna ended up a bridesmaid. Because Anna was clearly surprised to be asked, and with Josh not being included, it now seems a little odd, when Jill could have asked Amy (who did sing- but often times an attendant does both.) or Jennifer Hartano (who was in the dressing room) or Erin Bates and the string quartet could have played the wedding march.

[SoSueMe]

A note one the honeymoon:  It's my fervent hope they DIDN'T have sex that first night!  Going from strictly side hugs and hand holding to full on hot monkey sex in 2 hours is just too much for someone who's only ever seen a naked male when changing his diapers.  I would hope they did some kissing and cuddling the first night then slowly progressed to touching and then after a week or so to the "full act".  I hope Derrikdillard had some compassion for his bride and her obvious fear and nervousness for the first few nights!

I didn't note any obvious fear and nervousness. She seemed to be enjoying being the focus of speculation about the wedding night and No More Chaperons! Just my opinion.

[cmr2014]

I think that the running down the aisle is a "thing" right now. I don't think it had anything to do with wanting to be alone (although I'm sure they did).

 

Also, I don't think that Derick showed any particular lack of affection in the kissing. I think he was exhausted and overwrought -- between the wedding, his mom's illness, the weather, filming, etc. My impression was that the Duggars were wearing on his last nerve, and he wanted to take his bride and leave (his face at the rehearsal dinner and his interactions with Jackson just make me think that he was done).

[glow]

I think that the running down the aisle is a "thing" right now. I don't think it had anything to do with wanting to be alone (although I'm sure they did).

 

 

Except that they kept on running. Jill got wrapped up in her dress and probably tripped or almost tripped, though it didn't make the cut. They showed her getting untangled and then the two kept on running, down the hallway and around the corner, away from everyone ... if they didn't want it to seem like they were sprinting to get frisky, freaky or hot and heavy, they should have simply walked down the aisle with some class, with their wedding party.

 

That said, I've seen couples dance down the aisle after being married. It helps when they actually have rhythm and you can see the celebration. It's joyous and fun to watch. The running, sprinting and racing out the room was a big WTF - I hope she doesn't trip.

Edited October 31, 2014 by glow

[Barb23]

Sierra (Dominguez) is a housewife with 4 kids (both easily verifiable via her FB). She also baked the lopsided cake. As we also know, VEnessa is a midwife. When would she realistically have time to plan weddings (and what if a client decided to go into labor that day?).

I feel pretty safe in saying that neither woman is a wedding planner by profession, although SIerra may have coordinated a MUCH smaller wedding or two in the past. Or who knows? Maybe since she was already baking the cake maybe she just volunteered herself to Jill? I'm curious what experience VEnessa had that made Jill think she'd be an effective Organizer of the Masses.

I don't think it was Sierra that made the wedding cake. Wasn't it one of the mom's that Jill help deliver the baby? When they went to do the cake testing, the mom was holding her daughter & explained how Jill asked her to bake the cake. Wasn't it said she also did the cake at the shower. I think they showed Jill helping her at her daughter's birth on the reruns this week. I can't remember her name but I don't think it was Sierra (Even tho Sierra rescued Michael's bday cake).

[MarkySnark]

While I disliked JimBoob's question about who the chaperone was when they were going to call DerreckDillard's mother, what I absolutely hated came a few seconds later. In a quick TH, Boob said that the kids "set their own rules" during courtship and engagement. Now, if they set their own rules, why in the fuck would they need a chaperone? If they break their own rules, they will know and they have only themselves to answer to. The chaperones are there to run to Boob and squeal if the couple breaks the rules HE set for them. I have no problem with their beliefs. To each his own. My problem is the lying about it.

[GEML]

The first look segment I thought was cruel. It was so obvious that they wanted to kiss, and it just seemed arrogant and stupid that they couldn't. They had saved their first kiss for their wedding day. Why did it also have to be in front of 1000 people except for the Duggars' show off "look at me" ism? Christians have a lot to say about living under Grace vs living under law. That moment shows that legalism is about controlling other people (in this case, JB controlling his children) not about making something good (a first kiss) more special.

Edited October 31, 2014 by GEML

[HeyNow]

After watching the episode, what still sticks with me as the worst was the fact that they didn't postpone the wedding until Cathy was in better shape.  I hated how they treated the subject at the beginning, and watching the boys (and her husband) as they struggled between being in pain and knowing they were supposed to be happy.....I imagine that Cathy could very well have insisted they go through with the wedding (an unselfish mom would do that!) but I cannot imagine putting anyone I love (my future husband) in that position.  Because, what's the hurry, really?  It just seems mindblowingly inconsiderate.  

 

Also, Jill has always seemed the aggressor in this relationship.  

[fliptopbox]

Jill's dress was pretty. But it also was at least 2 sizes too large. If it had been altered to fit her properly it could have been a million times nicer. I also think the barefoot thing indoors was weird. Not necessarily creepy, but unnecessary. They're not on a Hawaiian beach. Little slipper things would have been way better. Hell, even fancy sandals.

 

Michelle's dress made me laugh. She looked like a silver Christmas tree...with a bib. Seriously, what was happening on her chest?!

 

Derick's mom looked great, even for as ill as she was at the time. Anyone know her prognosis/situation by now?

 

Derick himself looked like he bought a too large suit jacket and then wadded it up and let it sit in the back of his closet for a month. Seriously, man? It's your wedding day, get a suit coat that fits! They all cost the same! Who told him that was a good look? Surely wherever he bought that had salespeople and tailors available.

 

Their reception was a joke. I wonder if they had any other drinks besides those pathetic melty root beer floats. I agree with Jinger, root beer is nasty. I guess Jill didn't consider that part. Also, who serves popcorn at a wedding? Although it was kind of a circus, so maybe..

 

I am also betting that was not at all how Derick pictured his wedding day, same goes for his family. Granted it seemed like they enjoyed themselves and were (mostly) pleased with the day....but to outsiders it was total tacky-city!

 

Erin Bates on the piano? Oh my, I felt like the Phantom of the Opera might show up..

 

Poor Jana. It seems like at this rate Joy will be courting/married before her. I really hope she finds someone that makes her happy; and saves her from her indentured servitude!

[3girlsforus]

After watching the episode, what still sticks with me as the worst was the fact that they didn't postpone the wedding until Cathy was in better shape.  I hated how they treated the subject at the beginning, and watching the boys (and her husband) as they struggled between being in pain and knowing they were supposed to be happy.....I imagine that Cathy could very well have insisted they go through with the wedding (an unselfish mom would do that!) but I cannot imagine putting anyone I love (my future husband) in that position.  Because, what's the hurry, really?  It just seems mindblowingly inconsiderate.  

 

Also, Jill has always seemed the aggressor in this relationship.  

I was wondering about this. I didn't watch many episodes this season so I'm not really up on the details of her illness. Not to be crass but did they have a reason to believe it was quite likely she'd be in better shape at some point? Often when there is a pending wedding and a cancer diagnosis they actually move up the wedding to be sure the loved one is around to attend. Of course then they don't put on a 1,000 guest spectacle. Honestly even if she told them to go ahead and they decided to proceed as planned I would have thought out of respect for her they would have had a smaller, more intimate event with more focus on family and less 'here's my mom -now all 1000 of you please try not to breathe on her since she's immunocompromised.' The fact that her illness seemed to really not impact the wedding in any way at all shows me that the Duggars consider the marriage to be about them and their family and the Dillards just supply the man. There was no attempt to join the families.

 

Oh and I had another question on this... are we to assume that the phone call to Cathy was staged? If not, if they seriously called her from the church on the wedding day to see if she was getting out of the hospital, them I'm just sick. First of all, what is she wasn't able to leave the hospital and get to the wedding? They were going to leave her alone in the hospital, alone, knowing the son was getting married???? I could never, ever do that. I would turn to my husband (to-be) and say 'either we don't get married today or we tell the minister to meet us at the hospital and we say our vows at her bedside'. If they really didn't know until the day of the wedding whether or not she was coming it seems definite to me that they would have gotten married anyway. If that is really the case these are some cold-hearted people

Edited October 31, 2014 by 3girlsforus

[fliptopbox]

Oh definitely. Any person who marries a Duggar will realize very fast their family will always come second to the Duggar clan. We rarely hear about Anna's family either. All the other family does is supply the spouse, since it's illegal and creepy to marry your siblings. Although I bet if it weren't JB and Michelle would encourage it. 

[NikSac]

I think that the running down the aisle is a "thing" right now. I don't think it had anything to do with wanting to be alone (although I'm sure they did)..

 

I agree. I thought it was cute. I have been to several weddings where they either walked, ran, jogged, or even skipped down the aisle and I thought it was part of what the couple liked.

[Hpmec]

JimBoob thinks its important that his sons-in-law become Duggars. I keep waiting for an off camera producer to ask him in a TH if Michelle's dad insisted he become a Ruark. Watching him squirm would be fun. Anyhow, he seems to be choosing guys for his daughters who are willing to obey his rules. I don't see any evidence that either Derick or Ben has any inclination to live a less Duggarcentric life.

Also I wonder what Derick's brother thought of the reception. - probably not much. I would bet big money that after Derick and Jill took off, he and whatever buddies were there headed for the nearest sports bar for burgers and brews (after making sure Cathy was home and comfortable, of course). He doesn't seem like the root beer float, rice krispie treat type.

Edited October 31, 2014 by Hpmec

[WhitneyWhit]

At least the bridesmaids didn't throw their bouquets at the couple. One of the strangest things from Josh and Anna's wedding (and Lord, there were many) was when the bridesmaids, simultaneously hurled their bouquets at them. 

[NausetGirl]

One thing I hadn't realized - Josh wasn't a groomsman. I had figured Anna was selected as a bridesmaid because Josh was a groomsman and they didn't want a married woman walking with another man. But that wasn't the case - well sort off, given the silly show at the end.

But I have a theory on Anna being included. I'm betting that Jana and Anna have become pretty close over the past year. Jana has spent a lot of time in DC, and Jill had been focused on other things. And it seemed to me that the relationship between Jill and Jana had cooled a little bit, which is often what happens when someone gets involved and married. I wondered if maybe Jill wasn't little jealous of Jana being close to Anna which is how Anna ended up a bridesmaid. Because Anna was clearly surprised to be asked, and with Josh not being included, it now seems a little odd, when Jill could have asked Amy (who did sing- but often times an attendant does both.) or Jennifer Hartano (who was in the dressing room) or Erin Bates and the string quartet could have played the wedding march.

 

Completely agree on the Jana/Anna connection. I think Anna has become much more mature since leaving Arkansas, and Jana was already mature beyond her years. Poor kid. I bet the two of them are finding LOT to talk about.

[starfire]

Posting this link to see the photo of the cookies and sloppy rice krispy treats on baking pans from Sams Club.  

 

They divided and conquered by making 3,000 servings of cake “brought in from across the nation,” 2,000 cupcakes, 3,000 cookies made at the Duggars’ home, 3,000 root beer floats and a big mix of salty snacks — including the Duggars’ beloved pickles!

 

http://starcasm.net/archives/279989

 

I can handle the barefoot and other bs but now I understand why they didn't do any coverage of the reception.  Because it was pathetic.

 

If the Duggars cooked all the cookies, I am curious how many days before they were prepared.  Saving money is one thing, but this is beyond crazy cheap and insulting to people you ask to buy you four vacuums. 

 

What could cake "brought in from across the nation" possibly mean? They asked guests who traveled from other states to bring along a sheet cake?

[zenme]

Flowers brought in from across the nation I get, but sheet cakes?

[NausetGirl]

Sierra is a fellow fundie and friend of the Duggars.

 

Something tells me the Duggars really don't associate with anyone who isn't a fundie. Not willingly anyway. I don't think they could stand the constant worry of being defrauded, of hearing about other people's ideas, views, opinions. Or worse, of their children hearing them.

[Sew Sumi]

I don't think it was Sierra that made the wedding cake. Wasn't it one of the mom's that Jill help deliver the baby? When they went to do the cake testing, the mom was holding her daughter & explained how Jill asked her to bake the cake. Wasn't it said she also did the cake at the shower. I think they showed Jill helping her at her daughter's birth on the reruns this week. I can't remember her name but I don't think it was Sierra (Even tho Sierra rescued Michael's bday cake).

@Barb23: You're right. I forgot about the leghumper maternity client who volunteered to make the cake. So we have yet another person to blame for contributing to this hot mess of a wedding. :D

[GEML]

Let's face it - they could easily have postponed the wedding if they didn't have to deal with the legalistic "courtship" rule and simply acted like any other reasonable religious and thoughtful couple who takes their commitment to wait until marriage seriously. Then Derrick's mother could have enjoyed the wedding in a more healthy way, as the biggest round of chemo would have been over and her immune system would have had a chance to recover. I know we all think "she had cancer" but it does seem to be that she was mostly suffering from that effects of chemo, and that IS something they could have planned around a bit more thoughtfully, but they didn't.

[NausetGirl]

That's cringeworthy. If they were interested in a cheap option, then I would have done a fresh fruit salad, chicken salad on croissants (Sam's Club makes a great chicken salad and croissants), grilled vegetables (they can be cooked ahead of time and warmed, plus you can arrange them beautifully on a tray for serving), and a light lemonade with lemon wedge. 

 

I would also advise making those tortilla roll-ups (some call them pinwheels) in large quantities with several different kinds of meat if you are trying to keep guests from getting multiple sandwiches. They are a cinch to make and can be made ahead of time and stored in the fridge. 

 

You should have catered this wedding, PinkSprinkles.  The Duggars would have had a very nice, delicious, appropriate-for-a-mid-June-afternoon and [most important for them] inexpensive menu.

[Darknight]

Flowers brought in from across the nation I get, but sheet cakes?

Probably store bought

Something tells me the Duggars really don't associate with anyone who isn't a fundie. Not willingly anyway. I don't think they could stand the constant worry of being defrauded, of hearing about other people's ideas, views, opinions. Or worse, of their children hearing them.

But they sure have no problem doing interviews and magazine covers. Plus taking free trips and gifts

[Jynnan tonnix]

 

Watched the kisses again- especially after they fed each other cake.  I can honestly say that Derrick kisses her like one would kiss their mother.  I can tell Jill keeps waiting- hoping he will give her a real kiss.

I would imagine that with having had virtually no privacy during their entire courtship, and their lives filmed and scrutinized, he would well have been uncomfortable giving the world at large voyeuristic access into a "real' first kiss, and deliberately kept it to something which would not allow for any real "response" to build up.

[jmt111]

If I had attended this wedding, I'd have called and ordered a pizza delivery.

[ghoulina]

After watching the episode, what still sticks with me as the worst was the fact that they didn't postpone the wedding until Cathy was in better shape.  I hated how they treated the subject at the beginning, and watching the boys (and her husband) as they struggled between being in pain and knowing they were supposed to be happy.....I imagine that Cathy could very well have insisted they go through with the wedding (an unselfish mom would do that!) but I cannot imagine putting anyone I love (my future husband) in that position.  Because, what's the hurry, really?  It just seems mindblowingly inconsiderate.

 

Is it possible that Cathy didn't know if she would make it to see their wedding if they waited? I'm not sure how sick she actually is, so maybe I'm completely wrong. But if there's a chance that she is going to die, perhaps she wanted to make sure she saw her son get married. 

[Angeltoes]

For the love of God, will someone please clue me in on what the Lego conversation entailed?

[PinkSprinkles]

For the love of God, will someone please clue me in on what the Lego conversation entailed?

 

IIRC, JB sat Josh down during his wedding special and explained that sex is just like legos. He also alluded to the fact that women take more time than men, but this may have gone over Josh's head. Josh also made reference to the fact that he'd soon have a "working model" to figure everything out. 

[Higgins]

After watching the episode, what still sticks with me as the worst was the fact that they didn't postpone the wedding until Cathy was in better shape.  I hated how they treated the subject at the beginning, and watching the boys (and her husband) as they struggled between being in pain and knowing they were supposed to be happy.....I imagine that Cathy could very well have insisted they go through with the wedding (an unselfish mom would do that!) but I cannot imagine putting anyone I love (my future husband) in that position.  Because, what's the hurry, really?  It just seems mindblowingly inconsiderate.  

 

Also, Jill has always seemed the aggressor in this relationship.  

If you've ever been or known someone in that situation, the last thing they want is for everything to be about their illness. If I were her I would have been very upset to have them postpone the wedding because of me. It would have made me very anxious and upset if they had done that .

Edited October 31, 2014 by Higgins

[3girlsforus]

If you've ever been or known someone in that situation, the last thing they want is for everything to be about their illness. If I were her I would have been very upset to have them postpone the wedding because of me. It would have made me very anxious and upset if they had done that .

Unfortunately I've known three families in this situation. And I agree, no one wanted to postpone but two of the three did move the wedding up and to a small in-home ceremony so the ill parent could attend without added stress and exposure to germs. In both cases the bride and groom couldn't fathom getting married without their parent being there and the idea of a big party without them just didn't make sense. Sadly, in the third case the parent didn't live long enough to adjust plans at all. It was so devastating that they still just had a small party. 

[iluvobx]

So now I'm wondering - why such a split in traditions?  Does anyone have any ideas? It'd be interesting to find out. Was the South just poorer in general overall for so long? An agricultural economy that didn't yield an adequate enough income for entertaining? If these "light" receptions are the norm for the South [which was news to me, I'd never heard of before] it certainly rubs against the very iconic tradition of Southern hospitality. The Wilkes barbecue in "Gone With The Wind" has always been the epitome of what I thought Southern hospitality was.  Over-the-top entertaining of guests and visitors at every opportunity.

The reception is more to honor the bride and groom and to socialize.  If you are sitting at a table, you only seem to socialize with those that are seated at your table.  Hospitality has nothing to do with the amount of food nor the kinds of food but with being felt welcomed and appreciated.  It does not "rub" against the iconic tradition of Southern Hospitality.  Manners teach Southerns that you never take the last piece of anything, nor be a "pig" at a buffet.  Besides most weddings in the south take place in the evening-very rarely around dinner.  (Dinner is the main meal of the day at lot of people call it lunch).  Don't get me wrong, in the south, we plan to have more than enough of anything).

 

forgot to add:  In the South, if you are invited to the wedding, then you are invited to the reception.  I have known people that attended weddings in the north that we invited to the wedding, but not the reception that included the sit down dinner. 

Edited October 31, 2014 by iluvobx

[GinnyLee]

I'm enjoying this more than i thought I would. Theyvactually avoided repeat content, not as predicted.

I am seeing genuine feeling between the couple and Jill seems genuinely concerned about Cathy.

BTW, count me among those who didn't disapprove of going ahead with the wedding despite Cathy's hospitalization. I don't think it's disrespectful, and really when would they reschedule without risking another health crisis? I went to another wedding recently where groom's mother couldn't attend at last minute and was in the hospital. There was no question of going ahead, as it was long planned. Mom, age 92, attended by Skype.

 

I agree. I'm sorry Cathy's sick, but rescheduling last minute would have been inappropriate for a 1000 guest wedding.

[Darknight]

If I had attended this wedding, I'd have called and ordered a pizza delivery.

Lol.

I agree. I'm sorry Cathy's sick, but rescheduling last minute would have been inappropriate for a 1000 guest wedding.

I don't even know why they gad 1000 people. Do they even know 1000 people

[iluvobx]

I totally forgot to mention seasonal fruits.  There is usually a lot of munch on at a Southern reception.  When hubby & I married, the wedding was at 6:30 and we were gone by 8.  We had other things to do (wink wink).  Actually, we got married in a Baptist Church-so all of us younger ones went to the bar in the hotel and partied.

[GinnyLee]

Why are Boob and Mullet giggling/laughing during the ceremony?

 

That is definitely Erin Bates playing the piano. It sounds so over the top.

 

Like the other commenter said, Josie started to get bored. Also, the girl on the end decided to lie down like she wanted to take a nap. I'm not sure how they got her to sit back up.

[LunchBreak]

 

forgot to add:  In the South, if you are invited to the wedding, then you are invited to the reception.  I have known people that attended weddings in the north that we invited to the wedding, but not the reception that included the sit down dinner

 

Now that's a new one to me (in the North here).  Lately, I've seen a lot of instances in which the couple has an intimate ceremony, followed by a larger reception (I simply called mine a party..), sometimes not on the same day.  I imagine it would be slightly awkward to have the service/ceremony and immediately send half the group packing, but then again, there are no hard and fast rules anywhere these days.

 

As for the show, everyone beat me to most of the MEchelle, Boob, Miracle, Josh & his magic Tongue (having also starred in such episodes as....) comments, but I can't help but possibly repeat: how depressing to find out that you're completely physically incompatible with your new spouse on the wedding day.  Jill and Derrick could be fine, but yikes...  The physical side is only one aspect of marriage, but when I was dating, a bad, sloppy kisser was hard to overlook.

 

Oh, and I felt terrible for those newly motherless girls.  That faint glimmer of light that shines in Mechelle's eyes lasts 6 months or until the next miracle.  There is absolutely no warmth.  Boob is a blithering dolt who is extremely socially awkward, but thank God at least one parent shows some kind of love and affection for the kids past the nursing stage.  (Damn you, Michelle for making me defend Boob!!)

Edited October 31, 2014 by LunchBreak

[JerseyGirl]

The season finale wedding episode garnered a series-record of 4.4 million viewers.  The episode also scored a 3.0 rating with women 25-54 and women 18-49, beating the popular and violent FX show Sons of Anarchy in both overall viewers and that demographic.   The episode was TLC’s most-viewed telecast in four years.

 

The two programs were the most watched cable series episodes on Tuesday night, by far. NBA basketball on TNT came next with 2.4 million overall viewers and a 1.3 rating in the demographic.

 

Jill recently revealed that cameras have been filming her and Derick in the lead-up to their first child, and that they might even film the birth live.  “They’re actually filming during our pregnancy, we’re also doing some little diary-cam, home video things, but they’ll be following us throughout our pregnancy,” Jill said.

 

http://www.theepochtimes.com/n3/1052189-jill-duggar-wedding-sets-ratings-record-for-tlc-beats-sons-of-anarchy-in-key-demo/

[3girlsforus]

Jill recently revealed that cameras have been filming her and Derick in the lead-up to their first child, and that they might even film the birth live.  “They’re actually filming during our pregnancy, we’re also doing some little diary-cam, home video things, but they’ll be following us throughout our pregnancy,” Jill said.

 

http://www.theepochtimes.com/n3/1052189-jill-duggar-wedding-sets-ratings-record-for-tlc-beats-sons-of-anarchy-in-key-demo/

 

UGH

[wanderwoman]

Ugh. Nothing like having your life documented for the masses from embryo to death.

[Temperance]

I know everyone is liking Dan -- but didn't it seem like he had NOTHING to say -- hence the sarcastic "we've been brothers for 23 yrs now." And the story about how he met Jill first. It seemed like he had nothing to say about the couple probably because he hasn't interacted much with them and certainly not without a chaperone trailing behind. It was sweet and sad to see him speaking on behalf of their mother and father. You can see how stressed out they both are about their mom and still sad about their dad of course.

Wedding toasts are like that! In my experience, it can be very hard to come up with a pithy anecdote especially one that get mocked or won't embarrass the bride or groom or run too long or bring up sensitive issues, etc.  I thought Dan's toast was funny, pithy, and managed neither to offend the Duggars nor bring up what he doesn't like about them while honoring his family and the hard times they've been through. So far I have never heard a man give a better toast and I've heard both men and women give what I considered bad toasts.

[GinnyLee]

Amy and Aunt Deanna were in the bridal suite with everyone else. Amy was wearing a teal dress and Deanna was wearing a darker blue dress. They both looked happy for Jill.

I feel so sorry for JoyAnna. She looked completely heartbroken.

 

What you didn't see the screen flash past Amy and Aunt Deanna for those 2 seconds? You must of blinked. I thought it kind of rude that they couldn't give Amy and Deanna a full 20 second interview.

[truthtalk2014]

I can only speak for myself, but I have interacted with friends from quite a few protestant denominations, and I've never been aware of ANYONE considering the space where we worship sacred or consecrated. It's special because it has been set-aside for worship, but it's not endowed with any special spiritual qualities.

 

Worship is internal, and of course it can take place irrespective of the surroundings. On the other hand, just because a congregation chooses not to incorporate a lot of church-y trappings or religious symbology into their worship center, that doesn't mean they don't consider the place special. Different strokes.

 

Funny--I grew up Lutheran and have tons of Lutheran relatives, and I have never heard a Lutheran call the worship area a sanctuary.  ("Nave" is probably the term I've heard used most often in Lutheran circles.) On the other hand, I've visited/attended dozens of Baptist churches and hear them call the worship center a sanctuary all the time! I guess we're going to have to agree that there are regional variations in usage. :-)

Well said! 

 

The only thing I'd like to add--and pardon me if I have misinterpreted this--is that some people on this thread seem to be using the term "mega church" as somehow synonymous wth the modern floor plan. There are small, medium, and large churches that employ the stagelike floor plan. As I said previously, a few days ago I visited a Presbyterian church in my area with a completely modern layout, and I'd estimate its seating capacity at only about 250.

I hope to goodness they had the good sense to set up a snack room. Every wedding I've been part of, someone has organized a place in the church where the family and wedding party can pop in to grab a simple, non-messy snack and a bottle of water or Sprite (because they won't stain your clothes if there's a spill!).

I did see a big bowl of packages of skittles in the room.  

Edited October 31, 2014 by truthtalk2014

[Darknight]

UGH

You read my mind. So much for modesty

[andromeda331]

Manners teach Southerns that you never take the last piece of anything, nor be a "pig" at a BUFFET   . Besides most weddings in the south take place in the evening-very rarely around dinner. (Dinner is the main meal of the day at lot of people call it lunch). Don't get me wrong, in the south, we plan to have more than enough of anything).

 

 

I wondered if Southerns had as much food at wedding reception as they do at other meals. The few Southern people I know whether its going over to their house for lunch or dinner always have tons of food. Even if there's only five or ten people for dinner there's still enough for a hundred or two. 

 

If they were interested in a cheap option, then I would have done a fresh fruit salad, chicken salad on croissants (Sam's Club makes a great chicken salad and croissants), grilled vegetables (they can be cooked ahead of time and warmed, plus you can arrange them beautifully on a tray for serving), and a light lemonade with lemon wedge.

 

 

I think I need to Sam's Club now.