S12.E12: Must Love Dogs

[Rae Spellman]

51 minutes ago, Retired at last said:

Clara continues to lament how she pleasures Ryan every night and he has yet to reciprocate. So, why does she keep doing it???? It's almost like Paige - keep doing the same thing over and over and hope all of a sudden he changes. So, I think she needs to stop and say they will wait until it its a good connection for both of them. That might even help her to finally actually feel an emotional connection.  He can start with just taking his shirt off, for crying out loud!

Initially, I read pleasures as pressures. There is at least one picture of shirtless, Cross Fit enthusiast Ryan on the internet. 

[Empress1]

2 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

How did I miss that? What does Brianna do for a living? Does Vinny have a job or just not make as much money as Bri? 

Briana is an engineer. Vincent is a car broker (he brokers the deal between buyer and seller) with his own business that I think is fairly new. He also said he got a real estate license as a backup plan. Seems like he doesn’t want to work for someone else (no shade).

[Elizzikra]

Quote

There was one clip that showed Rocky doing his biting thing on someone's arm.  Whether Rocky breaks skin or not, that biting IS a huge issue and needs to be addressed.  As a homeowner, Eric probably knows that he would be sued if Rocky bit someone-especially if he bit into the skin.  That action of jumping up and biting alone would scare some people.  Although I truly love dogs, if a dog "faux" bit me I would probably hit it.  So, on this issue, Eric is right and Virginia really needs to train Rocky (whether or not they stay together).  

I don't think that Rocky is biting; I think he's mouthy. Most puppies are and some dogs are like that well into their adulthood. It's not an aggressive behavior; it's excitement or playful. It is something that the dog needs to be trained not to do, but it's very different from actual biting. You don't want to label a dog as a "biter" unless that's really what the dog is doing. A few days of consistent "no mouth" correction and Rocky will learn not to do it.

I do think a huge part of the problem is that Eric and Virginia have very different ideas about dog behavior and discipline (and probably will about parenting actual human children as well). For example, Eric found it unacceptable that, when he is sitting on the sofa, Rocky "jumps" on him. I would not say that the dog is jumping on him; what Rocky actually did was put his front paws up on Eric's leg and the edge of the sofa cushion, seeking attention. Personally, my dogs do that and I'm fine with it. But Virginia and Eric need to set consistent expectations for their dogs and then follow through. If they aren't consistent, Rocky won't know what he is expected to do.

Also, I don't care how well trained your dog is or how much you think he will never leave your side, if your dog isn't in the house or a fenced yard, put him on a leash.

Quote

Then they add a shot of Pastor Cal being disgusted at Chris.

I really, REALLY need a gif of that.

[Spectator]

As much as I feel for Clara and her unfulfilled sexual needs, I catch myself in my own double standard perspective all the time with these two. I can’t help but think that if the roles were reversed and Ryan were the one gunning for sex all the time and he were the one who was recorded on film aggressively complaining to all his friends about how Clara wouldn’t give it up, I wouldn’t be liking him all that much. I wouldn’t be liking him at all, in fact. And I might even be afraid that he had some rather concerning anger issues. I feel like Clara is given a lot more latitude to express her frustrations simply because she is a woman, which really isn’t fair. 
 

I have to remind myself that no one should be pressured into having sex, ever, but especially in this weird MAFS set up where the parties involved don’t even select their own partners. Participants should never feel obligated to have sex because some supposed “experts” paired them up and said “GO”. That would essentially make the experts pimps. Lol. 
 

So I’m supportive of Ryan if he wants to wait. The trick, I think, is that he needs to communicate his feelings with Clara regularly and reassure her in other ways that he is attracted to her, he enjoys her company, he loves her personality, etc. otherwise her feelings of rejection could take hold and really weigh on the relationship.

I wish them the best. I’m very hopeful they will work things out. 

[dirtypop90]

I’ve finally caught up. Every single couple is a bad match. I’m surprised Brianna is tolerating Vincent. She must have been doing real bad in the dating market. 

Ryan is just not into Clare. And as far as the other sexual favors happening, Clare is likely leading those. I don’t like how I’ve seen (other places) people saying Ryan is making her perform oral sex. I’m sure Clare is volunteering and attempting to get other things started and failing. I don’t think Clare is his type physically, spiritually, mentally, in any way. He probably thinks she is trashy.

I don’t want to talk about Chris and Paige. They are both ridiculous. I might hate Paige more.

Zero surprise here Erik is unraveling

The other couple isn’t worth discussing.

Edited April 2, 2021 by dirtypop90
typo

[Hangin Out]

22 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Why does it look like Vinny is in bed with his clothes on?  These in bed conversations are so fake. 

So is the show.

[Hangin Out]

21 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

Haley needs a wardrobe makeover.  Those jeans are not flattering.

Neither is that Amish buggy hat.

21 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Haley's dog likes Jake! 

Dogs sense good people.

 

[Ilovepie]

41 minutes ago, Spectator said:

As much as I feel for Clara and her unfulfilled sexual needs, I catch myself in my own double standard perspective all the time with these two. I can’t help but think that if the roles were reversed and Ryan were the one gunning for sex all the time and he were the one who was recorded on film aggressively complaining to all his friends about how Clara wouldn’t give it up, I wouldn’t be liking him all that much. I wouldn’t be liking him at all, in fact. And I might even be afraid that he had some rather concerning anger issues. I feel like Clara is given a lot more latitude to express her frustrations simply because she is a woman, which really isn’t fair. 
 

I have to remind myself that no one should be pressured into having sex, ever, but especially in this weird MAFS set up where the parties involved don’t even select their own partners. Participants should never feel obligated to have sex because some supposed “experts” paired them up and said “GO”. That would essentially make the experts pimps. Lol. 
 

So I’m supportive of Ryan if he wants to wait. The trick, I think, is that he needs to communicate his feelings with Clara regularly and reassure her in other ways that he is attracted to her, he enjoys her company, he loves her personality, etc. otherwise her feelings of rejection could take hold and really weigh on the relationship.

I wish them the best. I’m very hopeful they will work things out. 

I completely second this, and agree that if the roles were reversed we would be calling Ryan a creep. Instead, she's getting a pass and everyone is questioning if he's a virgin.  They have only known each other a matter of weeks under weird circumstances. I think if he didn't care about her he would have just jumped in the sack. I think he's hyper aware he hasn't ever told anyone he loves them, and he knows that it's necessary this time because a wife is certainly going to expect you to love them. Clara even quantified it for him - he has six months to "get there". I think he's trying to find the love before the sex so he doesn't confuse the two, and if she really wanted this to work, she needs give him at least this time to figure it out. It's not that long. I am sure Clara can take care of her own sexual needs for the time being if she so desires.....

And I'm not getting into whatever is going down (apparently it's Clara) with them in the bedroom. There's a solution there - stop doing it if he isn't reciprocating!

[Hangin Out]

21 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

Haley and Jake are so uncomfortable together, I don't even know how they're digesting their food.

She’s going to lose twenty pounds.  He’ll probably gain ten.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

None of the men are as thoughtful as they appear- the elaborate dates and gifts are clearly suggested, planned and paid for by production.  I don't think any of these couples have found "the one" in their matches; they're all just so tired of dating and desperate to find love that they'd probably project feelings onto a volleyball ala Tom Hanks in Castaway if they had to.  

[Crashcourse]

22 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Haley's dog likes Jake! 

Of course!  The dog smells meat! 😋

[Hangin Out]

20 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

We've already talked about Ryan's haircut, but I don't understand what's going on with that facial hair.

What did Ryan just say?  What was all that bullshit?  Clara should stop doing whatever it is she's doing and forget about the sex.     

She should NOT have been doing what’s she’s done in the first place.  Great for him, not for her.  Stupid woman.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

Ryan needs to knock off the one sided foreplay mentality- what's good for the goose is good for the gander.

[Hangin Out]

20 hours ago, Straycat80 said:

Hmm, Clara says ‘she’s getting Ryan off every night’. But he’s not having sex with her. She really needs to say the stuff she’s telling the girls to Ryan. 

She’s told the whole world that.  How nice.  Her family must be proud.  I doubt he will stay married to her.  She’s talks too much about their personal life.

[princelina]

6 hours ago, Empress1 said:

I don’t recall. If her seat is too low & she sticks with riding, her knees will let her know soon enough.

Is Virginia hot? I think she and Erik are pretty evenly matched in terms of attractiveness (both average, IMO). The main difference between them to me is that Virginia always looks a little unkempt to me (there were a lot of scenes this episode where I was thinking that her hair needed brushing) and Erik looks more buttoned-up. Of all the women, Virginia appears to take the least care re: her appearance and dresses the most casually.

ETA: jinx, @Shauna

I'm not saying I think she's hot - but I think HE thinks she is.  I agree about their level of attractiveness - actually I think most of the couples this season are equally matched on attractiveness.  Too bad that's the only thing they're well-matched on 😄 

 

[Auntie Anxiety]

2 hours ago, Spectator said:

 

As much as I feel for Clara and her unfulfilled sexual needs, I catch myself in my own double standard perspective all the time with these two. I can’t help but think that if the roles were reversed and Ryan were the one gunning for sex all the time and he were the one who was recorded on film aggressively complaining to all his friends about how Clara wouldn’t give it up, I wouldn’t be liking him all that much. I wouldn’t be liking him at all, in fact. And I might even be afraid that he had some rather concerning anger issues. I feel like Clara is given a lot more latitude to express her frustrations simply because she is a woman, which really isn’t fair.

I agree 100%. Just think about the roles being reversed. If Ryan would be pressuring Clara while telling the world that intercourse is as meaningful as having sex with an apple pie, we would be disgusted by him. 

Virginia is in no shape to be married to anyone at this point. She has a lot of emotional problems (I think anxiety is just the tip of the iceberg) and needs psychotherapy.

If Eric wants Rocky to be better behaved, what he should have said is “Let’s try to find a trainer to teach US how to help Rocky be even more amazing than he already is.”  Actually, dog training is really about owner training. (My own puppy from hell turned out to be the sweetest dog ever with clicker training and positive reinforcement.) Virginia hears everything as a knock against her. I wish I could teach these fools how to talk to each other without sounding like they are pointing fingers.

Speaking of speaking, I simply cannot stand hearing them say “like” constantly. 

 

 

 

Edited April 2, 2021 by Auntie Anxiety

[Meowwww]

5 hours ago, Crashcourse said:

I thought Vinnie was joking about all those dates, just going by the way they both laughed after he rattled them off.

I agree.  She even joked that she would need to get a second job. 

8 minutes ago, Auntie Anxiety said:

 

Speaking of speaking, I simply cannot stand hearing them say “like” constantly. 

 

 

 

I agree with this too!  Such a weird verbal tick.  It’s the new “um”

Edited April 2, 2021 by Meowwww

[Jax7917]

I haven’t read the comments yet so not sure what’s been discussed but my question to all of you is - what do you think the real reason is that he won’t have sex ? I’m not buying what he’s selling . Maybe he has erectile dysfunction and is embarrassed ? I feel as frustrated as Clara in this situation lol . But she does say they do everything else so who knows ? 
what I do know is he says the word “ sure “ way too much . 
 

Virginia definitely has issues and is an alcoholic, but Eric is majorly controlling . He speaks down to her all the time and treats her like a military daughter more than a wife . He actually gives me the creeps . 
 

Haley is blah but I wouldn’t want to be married to Jake either . He has no personality and is very socially awkward . 

Edited April 2, 2021 by Jax7917

[TzuShih]

Re Jake and Haley.....  While I do snicker at Jake's low-key humor... in this episode, Haley made a pretty astute observation that has been bothering me for awhile.   In most of their filmed bits together, I've become aware that Jake seems to lack basic curiosity as to anything that 'makes Haley tick' -- he seems to display little interest in WHO she really is --- from her family history to her fascination with world travel and stories she would obviously love to share.  (A part of me wonders if Jake feels that Haley's worldly experiences make him feel 'minimalized' due to his own more limited travels.  I seem to recall their wedding day 'champagne-pop' discourse when Haley shared her love of traveling and Jake quickly countered with something about "not having a passport."  Sadly, their ability to communicate seems to terminate any of the 'fun' times they attempt to share...even as just 'friends.'

[gonecrackers]

Maybe Jake would feel more interested in Haley if she was actually sticking around when they weren’t filming. He said on Unfiltered she’s leaves with the cameras. Her ‘interest’ in a relationship with Jake is fake.

[Alexander Pope]

On 3/31/2021 at 6:48 PM, jennyf said:

Erik and Virginia had speaks but they are a total mismatch and really toxic. I don’t think he’s ever dealt with anyone with mental health issues and she knows she has some. Agree with him though that her dog needs retraining. Erik is clearly trying to control himself when they’re talking in front of the cameras but he is really even more horrible when they’re not. 

I agree that Erik is worse off camera.  When we saw the tape of them having their fight, he was as drunk as she was and she was saying that he was "always like this" when he was drunk.  I think she is not the only one with a problem.

I also noticed that Jake had Erik's number when he was complaining about Virginia's dog; Jake was right to raise the possibility of compromise which clearly Erik won't do.  Jake has his issues but he is no dummy and sees through other people's b.s., as has been noted before.

In other news, when Ryan was boasting to the camera about what a great husband he was, my eyes practically rolled out of my head.

[Hip-to-be-Square]

Ryan thinks he has the best marriage? What a neckless-wonder know it all!  Maybe in terms of one sided gratification its "the best" for him, but Clara's going to have to get a custom mouth guard made for how much he makes her grit her teeth around him.  

[pdlinda]

On 3/31/2021 at 5:43 PM, Crashcourse said:

That wig was awful.  Surely she could have found a better one somewhere.

The foot-long false eyelashes did her no favors either....

30 minutes ago, Alexander Pope said:

when Ryan was boasting to the camera about what a great husband he was, my eyes practically rolled out of my head.

DITTO!!  It's called "denial and delusion."  

I still also insist that Clara looks much older than he does and I do NOT get any romantic vibe from him toward her.  NONE....

[Auntie Anxiety]

20 minutes ago, pdlinda said:

DITTO!!  It's called "denial and delusion."  

Served with an industrial strength side order of lack of self-awareness.

[CSunshine76]

On 3/31/2021 at 7:10 PM, gonecrackers said:

It's supposed to be 1st thing in the morning but Erik sounds drunk.

I just started watching, but is it the end or start of the day? Because dude is HAMMERED!   Virginia rubbing off on him? Geez.

[Ms.C.]

On 3/31/2021 at 6:11 PM, Empress1 said:

I’m familiar with the term; I just don’t understand how it applies to Ryan, as I don’t think he’s classified himself in that way. He’s said he went to predominantly white schools growing up but I don’t think we know anything about the way his Blackness influences his life, then or now, or if he tried to assimilate with whiteness then or now.

I agree with this.  Personally, I think he’s already decided she’s not the one.  Could very well be wrong. She disses him too often.  He notices.  She’s told him he’s boring, shown him her kids will become her, and his non-sex approach is his message “you’re not the one.”  Maybe she’s already received the message and dissing him is her defense   Obviously, I like Ryan   😋

 

[Hangin Out]

11 hours ago, Retired at last said:

What has been driving me crazy is that Clara continues to lament how she pleasures Ryan every night and he has yet to reciprocate. So, why does she keep doing it???? It's almost like Paige - keep doing the same thing over and over and hope all of a sudden he changes. So, I think she needs to stop and say they will wait until it its a good connection for both of them. That might even help her to finally actually feel an emotional connection.  He can start with just taking his shirt off, for crying out loud!

You would think she should let HIM be the aggressor.  I would be mortified if I was turned down like that.  She keeps doing it and she’s the fool.  Plus, I don’t go for his goody personality or whatever he is going for.  I’ve had it with both of them and her whining.

,

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Hangin Out]

4 hours ago, Alexander Pope said:

I agree that Erik is worse off camera.  When we saw the tape of them having their fight, he was as drunk as she was and she was saying that he was "always like this" when he was drunk.  I think she is not the only one with a problem.

I also noticed that Jake had Erik's number when he was complaining about Virginia's dog; Jake was right to raise the possibility of compromise which clearly Erik won't do.  Jake has his issues but he is no dummy and sees through other people's b.s., as has been noted before.

In other news, when Ryan was boasting to the camera about what a great husband he was, my eyes practically rolled out of my head.

Jake is quiet and minds his business.  He’s letting everyone hang themselves.  Too bad Haily doesn’t see the good in him.  She only sees the quirks, but I guess if you just don’t have it for someone whatever the reason, then that’s that.  Too bad.  Look at Jamie.  She cried when she married Doug.  Looks wise, they weren’t a match, but she was tired of looking and then realized the good in Doug.  She got tired of looking for Mr. Right and settled.  Not everyone can do it tho.  Haley made up her mind to get the divorce.  Jamie rather be married and have children.  Haley is satisfied being single and with friends.

 

 

 

[Ms.C.]

Funny. I fell asleep and missed last half hour or so. Too many mismatches. Older settled Eric with teenager Virginia?  Aka The Bickersons.   Done with them.  Jake and Haley mismatched bc he needed older bit more desperate woman.  I like Jake but mismatch esp in age    Needs someone in on eighties joke.  
 

Clara and Ryan - don’t really care.  Used to but repetitive. Going nowhere. 

Chris - 💤💤💤. Paige - I’ve grown to like her bc authenticity finally coming out.  
 

Congratulations, Vincent and Brianna.  Only normal couple.  Vincent, keep moving forward   Last hope for this dreadful season  Glad Top Chef started tonight   

 

[Hangin Out]

5 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Maybe Jake would feel more interested in Haley if she was actually sticking around when they weren’t filming. He said on Unfiltered she’s leaves with the cameras. Her ‘interest’ in a relationship with Jake is fake.

Yes, she leaves when cameras are done then goes to her apartment.  She’s not even trying.  What a slap in his face.  Couldn’t she just stick it out the full time?  That is extremely hurtful to him.  Was he that bad?  I can’t even understand why she went on this show.

[Ms.C.]

8 minutes ago, Silver Bells said:

Jake is quiet and minds his business.  He’s letting everyone hang themselves.  Too bad Haily doesn’t see the good in him.  She only sees the quirks, but I guess if you just don’t have it for someone whatever the reason, then that’s that.  Too bad.  Look at Jamie.  She cried when she married Doug.  Looks wise, they weren’t a match, but she was tired of looking and then realized the good in Doug.  She got tired of looking for Mr. Right and settled.  Not everyone can do it tho.  Haley made up her mind to get the divorce.  Jamie rather be married and have children.  Haley is satisfied being single and with friends.

Good post. Haley too insecure for Jake.  To me, he’s comfortable with himself. And an observer.  And remember Jamie falling down laughing when first met Doug?  I find no wrong in a woman with that much grace and acceptance to share.  And she didn’t settle. She fell in love.  ❤️ 

[LennieBriscoe]

12 hours ago, Retired at last said:

What has been driving me crazy is that Clara continues to lament how she pleasures Ryan every night and he has yet to reciprocate. So, why does she keep doing it???? It's almost like Paige - keep doing the same thing over and over and hope all of a sudden he changes. So, I think she needs to stop and say they will wait until it its a good connection for both of them. That might even help her to finally actually feel an emotional connection.  He can start with just taking his shirt off, for crying out loud!

So....Clara does...stuff, and Ryan keeps his shirt on?! But she's allowed to see his parts?!

Or....does he make her wear her wedding blindfold? 🙈

Edited April 2, 2021 by LennieBriscoe

[Hangin Out]

7 hours ago, TzuShih said:

Re Jake and Haley.....  While I do snicker at Jake's low-key humor... in this episode, Haley made a pretty astute observation that has been bothering me for awhile.   In most of their filmed bits together, I've become aware that Jake seems to lack basic curiosity as to anything that 'makes Haley tick' -- he seems to display little interest in WHO she really is --- from her family history to her fascination with world travel and stories she would obviously love to share.  (A part of me wonders if Jake feels that Haley's worldly experiences make him feel 'minimalized' due to his own more limited travels.  I seem to recall their wedding day 'champagne-pop' discourse when Haley shared her love of traveling and Jake quickly countered with something about "not having a passport."  Sadly, their ability to communicate seems to terminate any of the 'fun' times they attempt to share...even as just 'friends.'

I respectfully disagree.  My husband and I have nothing in common, but we compromise, and he doesn’t feel minimalized.  He likes his things, I like mine.  The trouble here seems to be that Haley doesn’t want to know more about Jake as she is always running away, either to her apartment or to friends.  She just didn’t like his looks from the beginning.  Besides the traveling sort of stops when the kiddies come except to Disneyworld.  Lol.  Every year we took vacation with the kids to Disney in Florida.  The first time my husband went with us to Disney.  Thereafter, I let him drop us off and told him to pick us up in 8 hours.  He went to play golf, picked us up and we all went to dinner.  Now, that’s compromise.  That’s how we roll and everyone is happy.  Haley likes to travel.  Some men do, and some don’t.  To me, she doesn’t look the type for kids either.  Her traveling would be on a gurney to the delivery room.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Lisa418722]

Rockie is still in the play stage of life. He wants to play with people.  With the "biting"  I had a puppy one time that loved to bite my socks - while my feet were still in them.  One time I pulled my foot back and ended up pulling a (baby) tooth out.  That broke her from ever biting my feet again.  She looked at me like "what did you do to me?"  I think I spent the rest of the night crying because I thought I really hurt her. Erik seems to be too controlling for me. Virginia has her own issues but she did not need to be matched with someone that controlling.  

[Lindz]

OMFG ERIK!!!! He's usually too harshly blunt & it's uncalled for, but this time Virginia totally deserved it!!! It was the PERFECT way to check her childish proclamation about THEIR dog. 😂😂
....Two seconds later.... AW DAMN!! He went overboard with the, "you can leave" line. 😅 That was his response to EVERYTHING she said. That's his response to her fighting his perceived control? Manipulation?!! Then playing victim? WTF?! Not good. Not mature. Not the right thing to do. Oy. These people!! Recurring problem!! Just saying their side & not validating the other's perspective & reaching a compromise. Erik resorts to telling her she can leave & Virginia can't even get to the point of thinking of any solution, she's so in her feelings. A MESS!! Is she taking offense on behalf of her dog, like it's a personal attack on her? WTF?!! Decide how y'all will correct his behavior, then do it! DUH!!! Comparing dog behavior was just weird & dumb. & what bs was she telling the girls that she wants to keep discussing the issue?? TOTAL BS!! She takes any opportunity to LEAVE the convo when it gets tough!! She has the attention span of a fly!! 😂😂 Plus ZERO regulation of her emotions. Shame

[Lindz]

Wow. They're loud, arguing drunks???? That's what they've become?? Just. Wow. 😞😅

[seacliffsal]

17 hours ago, Booger666 said:

I plead with you and everyone else to not hit a dog for faux biting.  When dogs are puppies normal play behavior includes faux biting / nipping and it is not a sign of aggression. It is very easy at this age to teach them that it isn’t good behavior with positive reinforcement, not hitting.  It is a little harder to train them when they are older but certainly can be done.  Whenever someone welcomes a new dog into their home a puppy/doggie manners class that uses positive reinforcement is a great idea.  There should be a spouse manners class for most of these MAFS messes.

I agree, let me clarify-if I thought a dog was really biting me I would respond.  I would prefer to use my stern/growling voice (which I have done [most notably when a pitbull started attacking my then Scottish Terrier]), but sometimes one just reacts to whatever the perceived issue/danger appears to be.  Just as someone would respond to a dog biting a child or one of their dogs.  The problem with faux biting is that one doesn't know it is faux biting until the dog backs off.  I do understand that play/faux biting is a part of puppy hood.  It did seem like Virginia did not try to redirect his biting (here's your toy...) which is what I have done with all of the young puppies I have had throughout my lifetime.    

Edited April 2, 2021 by seacliffsal

[seacliffsal]

Something that really surprised me was when there was talk of tarot cards, Paige responded that she would be open to that as it would be another source of direction.  Paige, pick a lane-either you are a strong Christian who believes everything that comes your way is from God or you take guidance from whatever source is right there at the time.  The Bible speaks very clearly about from whom to accept guidance and from what sources of direction one should reject.  Tarot cards are in the second category.  I was jarred by her comment and wondered if she is now blaming God for her own bad decisions.

[Booger666]

15 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I completely second this, and agree that if the roles were reversed we would be calling Ryan a creep. Instead, she's getting a pass and everyone is questioning if he's a virgin.

Dr Viv really bothered me about this.  When it was Miles and Karen, the advice was to take sex completely off the table and just do handholding, hugs and kisses.  With Keith and Iris it was to be clear sex would not be happening, but that they could do other sensual things like a massage or shower together.  When Clara asks for advice Dr Viv’s stupid ass response is a completely unhelpful ‘maybe he’s a virgin’.  

[Booger666]

58 minutes ago, seacliffsal said:

I agree, let me clarify-if I thought a dog was really biting me I would respond.  I would prefer to use my stern/growling voice (which I have done [most notably when a pitbull started attacking my then Scottish Terrier]), but sometimes one just reacts to whatever the perceived issue/danger appears to be.  Just as someone would respond to a dog biting a child or one of their dogs.  The problem with faux biting is that one doesn't know it is faux biting until the dog backs off.  I do understand that play/faux biting is a part of puppy hood.  It did seem like Virginia did not try to redirect his biting (here's your toy...) which is what I have done with all of the young puppies I have had throughout my lifetime.    

I’m sorry to hear your Terrier was attacked and hope your pup is OK.  When a dog is attacking a dog or person try throwing water on them (I usually walk with a water bottle just for this purpose).  It surprises them enough that they let go and you can separate the dog from whatever it is attacking.  Better than trying to hit as you risk getting bit and injured. 

On topic - we still all hate Chris.

Edited April 2, 2021 by Booger666

[qtpye]

On 4/1/2021 at 12:27 PM, psychoticstate said:

Oh boy.

I was team Eric until last night's episode.  Now I understand why Virginia drinks so much -- she's self-soothing.  She seems to suffer from some pretty serious anxiety, which should have been a red flag to the "experts."  I can't imagine how much marrying a stranger and then moving into a "neutral" apartment with said stranger, and leaving your cats behind, would incite anxiety.  I also understand how much  Rockie means to her; I had an amazing little Boston Terrier (like Eric's Tex) who helped me survive a painful divorce.  I adored my BT and I would have thrown down with anyone who criticized him.  

I already felt that Eric and Virginia wouldn't make it based on her immaturity and desire to party but Eric's rigid military-like stance on everything wont' gel either.  For every good thing he does (like taking Rockie to the pet store, asking questions from a trainer, buying Rockie a toy), he fucks it up by berating Virginia, being hostile, etc.  

Frankly, Virginia needs to pack herself and Rockie up, go back home and find a good therapist.  Eric can just fly away -- I'll take Tex!  

Jake and Haley are another lost cause.  I think Jake was looking a bit down after losing to Haley with the go-karts because he knows it's all for the cameras and that's it.   Brianna and Vincent aren't far off when they say that Jake and Haley just need to communicate.  Neither "gets" the other's personality.  And Haley can STFU with her constant refrain of how she's trying and she'll all by herself.  Girl, Sophie is trying more than you are.  And speaking of, Jake and Sophie are beyond cute.  He does seem to be a good dog dad - something that we NEVER see Haley comment on.

Brianna and Vincent should make it.  I loved their bike ride.  They are doing what MAFS couples should do during the 8-week period.  They are getting to know each other and doing low-key stuff.  Not everything is a major discussion or debate. 

I think Ryan is super cute with Miska but he seems very intimidated by Clara.  Understandable, since she is coming across as wanting a hard d*ck inside her, whether it's Ryan's or not.  Why can't she just talk to him about why it's okay that she's getting him off every night but he's not laying down the pipe?  She smiles and doesn't say anything to him but it's clear she's simmering and seething (as we saw at the end of last night's show.)   I understand Ryan wanting to get to know her but I don't understand how doing everything but actually putting it in (paraphrasing) is different.   I want them to go the distance, though, because I like each of them and I think they could be a good couple if they would just talk to each other.

How many times is Paige going to be "done" with Chris?   How many times is she going to tell us or someone else that this time it's over?  Enough already!  Chris should have been unceremoniously dumped in Vegas after Paige found out he wasn't attracted to her, despite hitting it twice on their wedding night, and then that Chris had not only been engaged two months before MAFS but also that his former fiancee was pregnant.  Peace out.   

Paige's brother and Chris's mother are clearly smarter than their sibling/offspring.  I don't need to see Chris ever again on my tv.  I could tell that Brianna was alternating between jumping for joy and smacking Paige upside the head with a "No shit!" when Paige announced that it was over (again) and she deserved better (duh).  

Unless the editing monkeys were at work, the previews for Decision Day (which should still be quite a few episodes down the road) pretty much gave away how it's going to go.   

 

On 4/1/2021 at 1:07 PM, Empress1 said:

I don’t recall. If her seat is too low & she sticks with riding, her knees will let her know soon enough.

Is Virginia hot? I think she and Erik are pretty evenly matched in terms of attractiveness (both average, IMO). The main difference between them to me is that Virginia always looks a little unkempt to me (there were a lot of scenes this episode where I was thinking that her hair needed brushing) and Erik looks more buttoned-up. Of all the women, Virginia appears to take the least care re: her appearance and dresses the most casually.

ETA: jinx, @Shauna

 

On 4/1/2021 at 1:07 PM, princelina said:

I think part of Erik's problem is that he's attracted and excited about his hot young wife, that they had instant chemistry, went better than he expected at first, so he's trying to make her happy on the one hand by drinking, going out and doing things that he just doesn't really know how to do.  Then they end up in stupid drunken fights that he doesn't know what to do with either.  Then when he's sober he thinks he's helping her to mature and act right, but he doesn't do that right either because he acts too much like a dad or a principal, as some have said.  He's definitely being a dick, but I can't hate him completely in that he came on this show as a guy who wanted to be married, and she came on as a girl who wanted to continue hitting the bars with her guys friends but thought it would be fun to take a husband along as well.  She's still the one who should never have been cast.

 

23 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

I agree 100%. Unless by some miracle they survive and join Couples Cam, I do not think we will ever actually see Ryan's true self. He is so closed off I have no idea what goes on there. I think he is doing this deliberately because he doesn't want his business on tv. He might be the most aware of the cameras of anyone in the history of this show. I think we might have gotten a glimmer when it was just they guys hanging out. He definitely seemed more relaxed and happy.....

 

21 hours ago, Retired at last said:

What has been driving me crazy is that Clara continues to lament how she pleasures Ryan every night and he has yet to reciprocate. So, why does she keep doing it???? It's almost like Paige - keep doing the same thing over and over and hope all of a sudden he changes. So, I think she needs to stop and say they will wait until it its a good connection for both of them. That might even help her to finally actually feel an emotional connection.  He can start with just taking his shirt off, for crying out loud!

 

14 hours ago, Alexander Pope said:

I agree that Erik is worse off camera.  When we saw the tape of them having their fight, he was as drunk as she was and she was saying that he was "always like this" when he was drunk.  I think she is not the only one with a problem.

I also noticed that Jake had Erik's number when he was complaining about Virginia's dog; Jake was right to raise the possibility of compromise which clearly Erik won't do.  Jake has his issues but he is no dummy and sees through other people's b.s., as has been noted before.

In other news, when Ryan was boasting to the camera about what a great husband he was, my eyes practically rolled out of my head.

I feel like Eric must have taught his dog how to fly a plane...like Snoopy

I do agree that Eric is very attracted to Virginia and he is obsessed with putting up a good face for the cameras. He always insisted his marriage was perfect in Vegas where Virginia was already seeing things that could lead to major issues.

They could be what each other needs or she will spiral more into being a drunken mess while he becomes more of a controlling daddy figure.

There is a picture of Eric's ex-wife in the spoiler thread...she is really pretty. He seems to be able to attract good looking women on his own but maybe he is just more attracted to a Virginia type.

I would hate it if my husband talked to me like a father.

Clara is an attractive woman but she might think of softening her hair to more of a golden blonde. Now everyone is so afraid of looking "brassy" that they go overboard with the purple shampoo stuff and making the hair platinum, which is hard to pull off.

I think Ryan might be withholding sex as a form of control. He might feel that Clara is taking over every aspect of his life (including his drawers) that having the power to control their sexual relations is the one thing that he has to hold on to.  She is stupid for getting him off every night with no reciprocation.

I would feel the same way if the genders were reversed. No man is going to pleasure a woman every night for a month when the result is the woman  just says "thanks" and goes to sleep.

 

Edited April 2, 2021 by qtpye

[Nancybeth]

I'm not sure that Virginia is necessarily "hot," although when she's put together I think she's conventionally attractive. For Eric, I think her perceived hotness comes from being younger and having a good body and her party girl, fun time, down for anything attitude. Also the fact that physical touch is clearly very important for her and she's been very touchy-feely and physical with him from the start. 

Jake and Haley confound me. At the beginning I was totally Team Jake, even though I complained that his stupid 80s obsession isn't a personality. But I go back and forth on which one I'm rooting for now, even in the same scene. They're fundamentally a mismatch, and they've never recovered from their very early missteps. Haley isn't really giving it a chance but Jake is purposely saying and doing things to kind of bait her. 

[bichonblitz]

13 hours ago, Alexander Pope said:

  Jake has his issues but he is no dummy and sees through other people's b.s., as has been noted before.

This is what I really like about Jake. 

[Elizzikra]

Quote

So....Clara does...stuff, and Ryan keeps his shirt on?

Maybe he's cold?

Quote

The problem with faux biting is that one doesn't know it is faux biting until the dog backs off. 

I did a lot of rescue and we had a lot of training on this. If a dog wants to hurt you, he will draw blood from the first bite. A dog that has a mouthy play style will have a lot of exaggerated facial expressions; mouth wide open and teeth on display. A dog that means you (or another dog) harm will have his teeth clenched and lips pulled back. 

Regular puppy/dog chewing also gets mistaken for biting sometimes. Puppies especially will gnaw on your finger or toes and may actually draw blood but it's not meant to hurt you. Substitute something appropriate for him to chew and he eventually will learn. A dog that is biting will clamp down on whatever body part and not want to let go.

But since this isn't a thread about dog training... I don't see any aggression in Rocky. He strikes me as a normal energetic puppy who doesn't have a lot of manners and maybe doesn't get sufficient exercise (a tired puppy is a good puppy!). Some training, more exercise and a clear set of things he's allowed to chew and he will be fine. Hopefully Virginia will do that.

[pdlinda]

20 hours ago, dirtypop90 said:

I don’t think Clare is his type physically, spiritually, mentally, in any way. He probably thinks she is trashy.

I would second that opinion 100X!  There is nothing "appealing" about Clara to Ryan; however, for purposes of the show, my inclination is that they will "stick it out together" after DD and then part "amicably" soon after the show ends. 

Same with Erik and VA, except that in their case, there is a simmering pathology seemingly imbedded in BOTH of them (especially VA) that is more concerning.  I see their parting taking a great emotional toll on VA.  Hopefully this experience will require her to connect with a competent mental health professional to work on her many issues.  Erik also has a zillion "issues"; however, with his professional and social standing (apparently) he may choose to ignore what led him to another dismal failure with a prospective mate and keep repeating his behavioral patterns, or,  he may choose to engage in therapy and, hopefully, fare much better in future relationships leading to marriage.

On the other hand, I believe both Clara and Ryan will move forward with their separate lives without a severe level of emotional damage.

[Hangin Out]

18 hours ago, Jax7917 said:

haven’t read the comments yet so not sure what’s been discussed but my question to all of you is - what do you think the real reason is that he won’t have sex ? I’m not buying what he’s selling . Maybe he has erectile dysfunction and is embarra

I think because she’s had sex with every color of the rainbow.  I don’t think he wants a woman who’s been with 545 men.  And advertises it to the world.  I’m sure his family doesn’t like her for that reason too.  Just MO.  Plus, there’s a chance she could become pregnant.

[qtpye]

20 minutes ago, pdlinda said:

I would second that opinion 100X!  There is nothing "appealing" about Clara to Ryan; however, for purposes of the show, my inclination is that they will "stick it out together" after DD and then part "amicably" soon after the show ends. 

Same with Erik and VA, except that in their case, there is a simmering pathology seemingly imbedded in BOTH of them (especially VA) that is more concerning.  I see their parting taking a great emotional toll on VA.  Hopefully this experience will require her to connect with a competent mental health professional to work on her many issues.  Erik also has a zillion "issues"; however, with his professional and social standing (apparently) he may choose to ignore what led him to another dismal failure with a prospective mate and keep repeating his behavioral patterns, or,  he may choose to engage in therapy and, hopefully, fare much better in future relationships leading to marriage.

On the other hand, I believe both Clara and Ryan will move forward with their separate lives without a severe level of emotional damage.

It makes me wonder about his first marriage and what were the issues that led to the divorce.

[Hangin Out]

1 hour ago, Elizzikra said:

Maybe he's cold?

I did a lot of rescue and we had a lot of training on this. If a dog wants to hurt you, he will draw blood from the first bite. A dog that has a mouthy play style will have a lot of exaggerated facial expressions; mouth wide open and teeth on display. A dog that means you (or another dog) harm will have his teeth clenched and lips pulled back. 

Regular puppy/dog chewing also gets mistaken for biting sometimes. Puppies especially will gnaw on your finger or toes and may actually draw blood but it's not meant to hurt you. Substitute something appropriate for him to chew and he eventually will learn. A dog that is biting will clamp down on whatever body part and not want to let go.

But since this isn't a thread about dog training... I don't see any aggression in Rocky. He strikes me as a normal energetic puppy who doesn't have a lot of manners and maybe doesn't get sufficient exercise (a tired puppy is a good puppy!). Some training, more exercise and a clear set of things he's allowed to chew and he will be fine. Hopefully Virginia will do that.

OMG .. “maybe he’s cold”, hahaha.  The funniest thing.

[Empress1]

11 minutes ago, qtpye said:

It makes me wonder about his first marriage and what were the issues that led to the divorce.

Erik also said he's been cheated on in every relationship he's ever been in. That's something he might want to look at. I don't think he's humble enough to do so, though.

[pdlinda]

9 minutes ago, qtpye said:

It makes me wonder about his first marriage and what were the issues that led to the divorce.

He keeps changing his story so I guess we'll never know.  It went from being a "...kind of arranged marriage because she wanted base privileges when he was active military) to him having a marriage with her that included "feelings" but , in the end, not working out.   

The impression I got from from Erik's explanations and use of his first marriage as a "teaching tool" for VA was that, OF COURSE, he was the "perfect one" (as he sees himself now) and she (the first wife) was the "problem."  

If I'm misstating Erik's position on his first marriage, please let me know🙂