S16.E11: Week 11

[alexa]

7 hours ago, Arkay said:

Ben saying that he doesn't understand how to cry is a little shocking, but along with not being able to tell Tayshia that he loves her, he seems to have learned to repress his emotions so they don't get away from him. This may be a coping mechanism he's developed after two suicide attempts. Somewhat the equivalent of the physical control he's mustered over his body, going from bulimic to a personal trainer.

I think it was very cold of Tayshia to be so dismissive of Ben after he was sent away. Why would she be angry that the time they've spent didn't mean anything to Ben? The man told you, at your insistence, the two enormously painful secrets of his life. Cut him if you'd like, that's your prerogative, but don't say this time didn't mean anything to him. From his perspective he gave you much more than he'd expected. 

I think she may not have fully understand what he was doing based on how he was after the hometown date (you could tell she was sad and confused then when he acted so distant), and then when she had to make the decision to let him go (most likely based partly on that and being unsure about him).  He didn't owe it to her to bow at her feet when she dismissed him, but I can see why she felt confused and wondered if she had imagined the good times they had together.  Because we all know he was upset about having to leave, but she didn't really know that sitting there with him saying--I will be fine, etc.

[JudyObscure]

10 hours ago, hyacinth said:

Where are the icily polite, clearly annoyed family members like mine would be?   To this day I honestly have no idea how they felt about my ex husband.   I didn't even tell them I was getting a divorce until after I was divorced and they were coming for Thanksgiving and I thought they might notice he was missing. 

 Thank you for making me feel less weird.  I was so scared to introduce my boyfriend to my parents, we eloped first instead.  Then when I finally took him home I lost my nerve and waited until we were gone to call them and say we were actually married.  Ten years later I went to visit them without him and my father made sarcastic remarks about him not being there the whole visit, so I went home and called them to say we were getting divorced.  

Other than her self-centered reaction to Ben not sobbing when she sent him home, I felt  like I was finally seeing the real Tayshia last night and I liked her.  I heard her real laugh while cooking with Ivan, and saw her funny side with Zac, and she was really nice with all the families.

I hope she picks Zac, there was a moment when they were alone after meeting his family.  She was telling him how comfortable she always felt with him and he was looking at her with pure melting love.  

 

[MMLEsq]

11 hours ago, saber5055 said:

I thought his choice of words was interesting and pretty elevated. I'd like to know more about him. He's rather well spoken, an oddity in this franchise. I found him interesting.

While I always appreciate an elevated vocabulary, it just felt a bit forced.  I really can't put my finger on why, but it just didn't feel authentic to me.  It came across -- to me -- as if he was purposely choosing words that weren't coming naturally.  

11 hours ago, DEL901 said:

Ben is...odd.  Almost a Stepford vibe, like he is behaving how he thinks he should...especially when they were at the pool.

I totally agree.  Ben seems focused on how he presents himself and it doesn't seem authentic.

 

I still like Brendan.  He was the first guy that I thought she had a real connection with (however many episodes ago).  

[Lamb18]

I'm watching this right now and I have to say, that picture of Ben and Tayshia looks more like a picture of Ben and Claire. Did the artist use the wrong photograph to work off of?

[ECM1231]

13 hours ago, saber5055 said:

 

Brendon doesn't have parents, or they couldn't make the trip? I should have paid attention to the beginning where all this was explained.

I haven't read through all the posts, SABER, so idk if this has been answered but Brendan did say his dad was deceased. He never mentioned his mother.

[hyacinth]

2 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

I was so scared to introduce my boyfriend to my parents, we eloped first instead.  Then when I finally took him home I lost my nerve and waited until we were gone to call them and say we were actually married.  Ten years later I went to visit them without him and my father made sarcastic remarks about him not being there the whole visit, so I went home and called them to say we were getting divorced.  

Well, thank you right back!    It's good to hear other families are the same as mine.   I like that you hid the marriage and the divorce, lol.   Maybe Ben's parents are in the same category and were too appalled to appear.     (Maybe he hadn't yet told them he was on the show.  😎)

I have a few doubts about Zac (Zach? oh, who cares) but their connection does seem strong.   We'll see soon enough in the fantasy suites.     

Edited December 16, 2020 by hyacinth

[Lamb18]

I just finished - I think she will cut Brendan next. I hope she ends up with Ivan, I like him the best. When she met his family I could feel this thought bubble above her head saying "My people!", especially when she saw Ivan's dad. Then I saw her dad in the previews and at first I thought it was Ivan's dad again.

[dirtypop90]

Zac has been clean for a decade now and took a leap to hard drugs after a brain tumor. I’m certainly empathetic to what being diagnosed with a tumor in your 20s can do to a person. My god brother got the same diagnosis at around the same age. Zac now has multiple addiction treatment facilities and clearly comes from a loving family who supported him and helped him get it together. I can’t say he’s not deserving of love. She can ask the details during FS and I’m sure she will. 

Ivan’s brother’s past isn’t an indictment on his family. He is younger so I do believe they are full. A lot of young men get caught up in gangs. Recruitment starts in middle school now. Sounds like he started involvement before his brain even fully developed. If he murdered someone I don’t think he would be free in his 20s. Would I have questions for Ivan about his affiliations? Yes, I do think marrying someone whose brother is gang affiliated and is around could raise safety concerns. But do we even know if Ivan lives close to his brother? I would ask during FS.

Edited December 16, 2020 by dirtypop90

[Lamb18]

13 hours ago, Katie111 said:

Tsushima and Ivan’s mom have very similar dresses on.  Both are somewhat of a strange choice for a date in the desert. 

If you mean Tayshia, I noticed, too, how color-coordinated the two were and the styles were similar.

[TomGirl]

11 hours ago, lizajane said:

Tayshia must have spent her time in quarantine memorizing the chapter Becca submitted in the Bachelorette handbook. Not gonna lie, like, it's a lot.

“It’s a lawt.  A LAWT.”

[Lamb18]

12 hours ago, DEL901 said:

“I’ll be alright...I’m always alright “.  So sad, especially since we know it isn’t true.   This is the guy with two recent suicide attempts.  

I think that was his way of saying he wasn't going to try to commit suicide out of disappointment. If she cared anything about him, she should feel relieved he could say that. 

It irritates me about people that think just because you don't show emotion, or the emotion they want to see, you don't have any emotions. 

[TVMovieBuff]

I wish women wouldn't wear strapless tops when they don't look good on them. Last year Barb, Peter's mom. This year someone else. 

Opinions are split in my world, whether showing off crepey arms and shoulder padding is body-shaming. I just think, don't wear something that doesn't look good. And on national TV no less.

[Kiss my mutt]

Did anyone stick around for the part where Zac’s mom was saying she was disappointed because she really wanted to meet Chris Harrison and then there is a knock on the door and he comes in and gives her a hug? That was cute. Then he goes onto announce his “There’s been a change” routine and then says “just joking” after Zac’s mom audibly gasps. 
So funny and she kept saying something like “oh my golly” several times in her scenes. She was just too adorable 

[Alexander Pope]

14 hours ago, DEL901 said:

Tayshia really doesn’t get him.  It is all about her.  He has told her about his issues...

I am beginning to think that Tayshia is a) an emotional vampire, and b) a narcissistic robot.  The guys express so much and she gives almost nothing.  Just turns on the charm and the smiles and the manic laughter.

[alexa]

34 minutes ago, TVMovieBuff said:

I wish women wouldn't wear strapless tops when they don't look good on them. Last year Barb, Peter's mom. This year someone else. 

Opinions are split in my world, whether showing off crepey arms and shoulder padding is body-shaming. I just think, don't wear something that doesn't look good. And on national TV no less.

I am so with you.  I don’t know why so many people wear them.  There aren’t a lot of people that have good arms for it.  I consider myself in this group as well.  Lol

[saber5055]

2 hours ago, Lamb18 said:

I'm watching this right now and I have to say, that picture of Ben and Tayshia looks more like a picture of Ben and Claire. Did the artist use the wrong photograph to work off of?

I thought the same thing. I totally could see Ben, but Tayshia? No way. Not even close.

[Crashcourse]

27 minutes ago, Alexander Pope said:

I am beginning to think that Tayshia is a) an emotional vampire, and b) a narcissistic robot.  The guys express so much and she gives almost nothing.  Just turns on the charm and the smiles and the manic laughter.

Yes, that's what she does.  She seems to think that if she grins and flashes those teeth enough (and swings those boobs), that's all she needs to do.  She thinks she is "charming" but I think she's fake.   There's no "there" there. 

[saber5055]

30 minutes ago, Alexander Pope said:

I am beginning to think that Tayshia is a) an emotional vampire, and b) a narcissistic robot.  The guys express so much and she gives almost nothing.  Just turns on the charm and the smiles and the manic laughter.

So much this. Thank you.

[valen]

Those scenes with Ben are something, and they make me like Tayshia a whole lot less than I did. He shared things with her that he's not even shared with his family. He's been with her for a total of about 3 hours. What is wrong with these people? She's been on the show before. She knows how this works. I'm glad she cut him though. Someone who would criticize him and get mad at him for not begging to stay after she DUMPED him is not the right one for him.

[saber5055]

12 hours ago, lizajane said:

Poor guy needs to learn how to express his emotions.  I hope he realizes that he blew it by not professing his everlasting adoration.

Well, in my opinion Ben is one of the lucky ones who gets to live another day, and perhaps make it to BIP where the real fun is. I don't think Tayshia is "all that." In fact, after watching every episode of this season, I don't know anything about Tayshia deeper than her hate for bras.

[saber5055]

12 hours ago, Arkay said:

Ben saying that he doesn't understand how to cry is a little shocking, but along with not being able to tell Tayshia that he loves her, he seems to have learned to repress his emotions so they don't get away from him.

We didn't hear anything about Ben's military experience or why he left the service. Military is not an easy life these days, and those in the service see things the rest of us can't even imagine. One has to build up a resistance to breaking down and crying or that's all he or she would be doing 24/7. We also don't know what caused him to overeat and gain weight. There's a lot there that maybe he shared with Tayshia, maybe he did not, but thank you show for keeping some of his personal life private.

There's a big difference between seeing your best friend get blown up by an IUD, or maybe your entire squad that you commanded, and some chick you met a couple weeks ago sending you home on a reality dating show. Tayshia needs to get over her self-centered self.

[tennisgurl]

The DIY Hometowns were cuter than I thought they would be, especially the fake New York and the cardboard Taxi cabs. Tayshia actually seemed to be having fun after a few weeks of her being mostly annoyed at the guys drama, we saw the really likable side of her that I enjoyed so much in previous seasons. 

Ben leaving is probably for the best, I think that he really needs to take care of himself and work on dealing with more of his issues before he starts a serious relationship. Ben saying how he has no idea how to cry is rather concerning, but I can imagine that its a sort of coping mechanism after the suicide attempts and other mental health issues he has dealt with, and is another reason I hope that he doesn't take this too hard and is still getting help. Tayshia getting all upset that Ben didn't start sobbing at her feet was a bit understandable, but I would think that she would guess that he was just in shock, that he tends to repress things, or that he just isn't very visibly emotional. Some people just deal with things internally, it doesn't mean they don't feel things, they just don't show it by crying or yelling or more visible expressions. I always get annoyed when people assume that when someone isn't crying and freaking out they aren't feeling anything, that's just not how everyone processes, there is no right or wring way to be upset and no one should feel like they have to put on a show when they feel sad. It felt like Tayshia was annoyed that she wasn't getting the reaction that she wanted. She has to know how Ben felt about her, after how much he opened up about really personal stuff with her, even if he couldn't actually say it. 

[CraftyHazel]

I’m a little sad for Ben, because I was rather emotionless as a teen and young adult.  My parents were both very pragmatic people and also not very loving or hands-on parents, so affection was not something I really understood.  I don’t actually remember a single hug or kiss from either parent, ever.  I do recall once telling my parents “I love you” when they said goodnight through the bedroom door, and being met with dead silence.  I was all of six years old.

My mother died just after I turned 15.  My father broke the news through the bathroom door when I returned home from an evening of babysitting.  I looked at my reflection in the mirror, gave a tiny smile (which baffles me to this day) and said, “Okay.”  When I went back to school the Monday after, I told my English teacher I needed 3 days of assignments because we were going to Ohio (where my mother was born and is buried), and she smiled and said, “Oh, that’ll be a fun little vacation!”, and I very calmly stated that we were going for my mother’s funeral.  She looked...and probably was, in retrospect...quite devastated.

I’m not that little girl anymore, but it wasn’t an easy ride.

[Kiss my mutt]

Peter’s mom probably still sees herself in her beauty queen, hot stewardess days not the actual frump-a-dump she actually is. I’d be nicer about it if she weren’t such a cow on the Bachelor. 

[Arkay]

14 minutes ago, CraftyHazel said:

 

My mother died just after I turned 15.  My father broke the news through the bathroom door when I returned home from an evening of babysitting.  I looked at my reflection in the mirror, gave a tiny smile (which baffles me to this day) and said, “Okay.”  When I went back to school the Monday after, I told my English teacher I needed 3 days of assignments because we were going to Ohio (where my mother was born and is buried), and she smiled and said, “Oh, that’ll be a fun little vacation!”, and I very calmly stated that we were going for my mother’s funeral.  She looked...and probably was, in retrospect...quite devastated.

 

So very sorry you had to endure such a tragedy. I also taught English.  We are usually the ones who discover the children's' emotional issues, due to the fact that in our subject they write essays (as opposed to multiple choice tests as in other subjects). It was my experience that dozens of students over the years lost parents, either before they reached my grade (eighth) or during the school year. One mother was beheaded, actually.

 I had a little girl like you whose mother died the day before a blizzard here in NYC. The school received a call and we did not expect her to attend, particularly with an impending blizzard. She did come and went through the day in such a stoic manner that we wouldn't have otherwise guessed that her mother had just died. She was 13 or 14. When I spoke with her privately, she adamantly refused to discuss it and told me she didn't want the other kids to know. For the remainder of the school year she never revealed it to anyone.

This is in stark contrast to most of the other students. If they lost a parent they were very apt to allude to their loss in everything they wrote and in many emotional conversations. 

I say all this to once again express my disgust with Tayshia's very self-centered reaction to Ben. It could be the military that shaped him, as @saber5055 suggests, or it could be anything. In your case, @CraftyHazel, it seems to be how your family responded. People are so unique, though, no matter how they were raised. For example, how different Zac and Ivan are from their brothers, even though both seem to have intact, loving families.

[TVMovieBuff]

This portion of the season with Tayshia feels rushed. With good reason, that Clare took up the first few weeks. It is in fact a truncated season. 

We had both extremes; love at first sight, to Tayshia not seeming al that taken with any of her final 3. She shouldn't castigate Ben for not falling over himself to declare his love. She isn't showing any little signs that she isn't smitten with anyone either. 

I would be good with this season ending in no engagement, just a "see where it goes" type of ending. 

[JudyObscure]

1 hour ago, CraftyHazel said:

My father broke the news through the bathroom door when I returned home from an evening of babysitting.  I looked at my reflection in the mirror, gave a tiny smile (which baffles me to this day)

That's a very common reaction from kids when they're suddenly nervous and fearful. My brothers and I all had a tendency to do that under stress or when we we're being lectured by my father, who would be watching for it so he could shout, "Wipe that silly grin off your face!"  It got so the first thought in our heads after getting in trouble or hearing bad news was, "Don't grin whatever you do don't grin." Which of course made us grin.

I can picture all of that in Ben's background plus getting punished instead of comforted when he cried.  If I had to pick which person had the deepest emotions, Tayshia who fell to her knees sobbing after sending home a man she had barely talked to, or Ben, who looked gray and shattered in that limo -- I'd go with Ben.

[rebel2u]

18 hours ago, hyacinth said:

I would dump someone who thought a carnival date back home was a good date but it did perk up the usually sad-eyed Brendan.   

I used to live in NYC and merely raising an arm is enough to get a cab to pull over.   

Where are the icily polite, clearly annoyed family members like mine would be?   To this day I honestly have no idea how they felt about my ex husband.   I didn't even tell them I was getting a divorce until after I was divorced and they were coming for Thanksgiving and I thought they might notice he was missing.   

Zach not wanting a spouse or children until meeting Tayshia (on a dating show) seems like a big red flag to me.   And he's usually stern?   Yech.   I think he's too complicated for Tayshia.  I would have preferred carefree, fun Noah for her, whose parents probably would have been a lively good time and quizzed her not at all.   

Cooking!   I'm liking Ivan.   (Edit:  like his Dad, too!)   I wish we could vote on who should be kept on like The Voice or DWTS.   Judges' call!    

Am I the only who could care less what my siblings think about any of my relationships?   

Damn, I'm drinking red and white wine again.  

FInally!  Someone has a family with traits somewhat similar to mine!  I don't even think my parents would consent to being on the show.  They're pretty private.  At best, they might sit at the table with both wearing the disguise of fake glasses with the fake nose attached.  If they thought of it,  they would probably ask to have their voices scrambled, too.  

Yes, and with my siblings, we all come together in a crisis but not to critique each other's relationships.  It they're happy, I'm happy.  

Interesting to see how the other half lives.  It's foreign to me but it might be fun.

[LuvMyShows]

8 hours ago, JudyObscure said:

I hope she picks Zac, there was a moment when they were alone after meeting his family.  She was telling him how comfortable she always felt with him and he was looking at her with pure melting love.  

I know that Zac has been sober for many years.  However, many addicts substitute healthier addictions.  He is intense, and if I were Tayshia, I might worry that he would become addicted to me, and display unhealthy patterns of interaction. 

3 hours ago, tennisgurl said:

It felt like Tayshia was annoyed that she wasn't getting the reaction that she wanted. She has to know how Ben felt about her, after how much he opened up about really personal stuff with her, even if he couldn't actually say it. 

The way she kept looking at him so expectantly almost made me feel that at some point after she didn't give him the rose, and before they walked out together, that Chris Harrison had told her that Ben said he loved her, and she was waiting for him to say it before he left.

3 hours ago, saber5055 said:

There's a big difference between seeing your best friend get blown up by an IUD

Come on...am I the only one who laughed at that?

[Back Atcha]

28 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

I know that Zac has been sober for many years.  However, many addicts substitute healthier addictions.  He is intense, and if I were Tayshia, I might worry that he would become addicted to me, and display unhealthy patterns of interaction. 

W O R D !!!

29 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

The way she kept looking at him so expectantly almost made me feel that at some point after she didn't give him the rose, and before they walked out together, that Chris Harrison had told her that Ben said he loved her, and she was waiting for him to say it before he left.

Maybe there was a $1,000 bonus for Tayshia if she could get him to say it.  She was gonna send him home anyway.

[thehepburn]

29 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

I know that Zac has been sober for many years.  However, many addicts substitute healthier addictions.  He is intense, and if I were Tayshia, I might worry that he would become addicted to me, and display unhealthy patterns of interaction. 

 

 

It's obvious that his current addiction is sneakers. As long as he can afford it, it's all good.

[Back Atcha]

1 hour ago, JudyObscure said:

Tayshia who fell to her knees sobbing after sending home a man she had barely talked to,

Are there more bonuses for the number of times one cries onscreen?

[saber5055]

29 minutes ago, LuvMyShows said:

Come on...am I the only one who laughed at that?

LOL! I'm laughing. I wondered when I typed it if it was the correct "device" or "the other one." I guess I meant IED. (I just looked it up!) But IUD is indeed funnier, and provides a pretty good mental image.

1 minute ago, Back Atcha said:

Are there more bonuses for the number of times one cries onscreen?

She might be working to have "a move" named after her, like The Mesnick.

[Back Atcha]

2 hours ago, CraftyHazel said:

 I don’t actually remember a single hug or kiss from either parent, ever.

The same for me.  When I was moving away the day after I got married (the only kid (24) still living at home with my divorced mother), at the door my mother said, "Aren't you going to kiss me good-bye?"  Sadly, I said, "I can't," because I couldn't.  Why didn't she just lean in and hug or kiss me??  She had never hugged or kissed us (perhaps she did when we were babies).  I made it a point to change my attitude and my life.  My sons (in their 50s) are extremely comfortable with affection ... and the times changed too-which made things easier.

[LuvMyShows]

One thing I found odd, is that when Brandon's niece Aliyah came to meet them and was running towards them, it really looked like Tayshia intercepted Aliyah so that she would be hugged before Brandon was.  I cannot imagine standing between (literally) a reunion among people who love each other, the way she did.

Also, it was interesting that in Zac's brother Matt's ITM, he said something about how Zac and Tayshia should get to know each other better and then might find that they're not right for each other.  That's not the usual kind of remark that we hear the relatives say, and I'm surprised that we didn't get to hear more of what might have been behind that.

[Back Atcha]

4 hours ago, saber5055 said:

There's a lot there that maybe he shared with Tayshia, maybe he did not, but thank you show for keeping some of his personal life private.

NOT ENOUGH!!!  Production prodded Tayshia to force these guys to tell "innermost secrets."  Despicable as far as I'm concerned...especially with someone as fragile as Ben.   With an eating disorder, two failed suicide attempts--recently, and a lot of therapy, he should never have been on this show.  Does he have no one but Food Network's Antonia and his sister to handle his therapy? Now we'll have to worry about him.

[greeneyedscorpio]

16 minutes ago, saber5055 said:

LOL! I'm laughing. I wondered when I typed it if it was the correct "device" or "the other one." I guess I meant IED. (I just looked it up!) But IUD is indeed funnier, and provides a pretty good mental image.

She might be working to have "a move" named after her, like The Mesnick.

I laughed!!

For those of us who weren't watching back then, what is The Mesnick?

[zoomama]

skipped to the end to say that i go regularly to la quinta to visit a sweet friend that lives really close to the resort. this was filmed in august.  it was brutally hot that month and since then too.....120 degrees is not unusual for august.  there is no way i can even describe to you guys what that feels like.  and i dont know why they filmed so much outdoors but then .....they were stuck to that resort only so i guess no other options but hotel rooms or outdoors.  i felt sorry for them when they had their suits on and were melting away. 

the mesnick!!!! that is when jason mesnick lean over a bannister literally sobbing after he sent home the woman that would end up being his wife. 

 

[saber5055]

10 minutes ago, zoomama said:

the mesnick!!!! that is when jason mesnick lean over a bannister

Well, it was a balcony, that other "B" word. It's been imitated, but never done as well as the originator did it. The Mesnick is a classic franchise move.

Edited December 16, 2020 by saber5055

[GracieK]

In the previews for the next episode Tayshia, all angsty says “there’s a rose ceremony - what do I do with THAT?” My hubby goes “she’s talking about his penis” 🤣🤣🤣🤣

We are super mature over here in the GracieK house. 

Edited December 16, 2020 by GracieK

[limecoke]

Palm Springs in the summer is brutal. I keep wondering why they didn’t film somewhere closer to the ocean. Maybe nothing was big enough given the restrictions but all the indoor flop sweat is puzzling since everything in PS is air-conditioned.

Beyond that, the “hometown” dates were weird.

[zoomama]

Just now, limecoke said:

Palm Springs in the summer is brutal. I keep wondering why they didn’t film somewhere closer to the ocean. Maybe nothing was big enough given the restrictions but all the indoor flop sweat is puzzling since everything in PS is air-conditioned.

Beyond that, the “hometown” dates were weird.

i do know it was off season so the franchise was able to rent out the whole entire hotel for the month of filming. i dont know any place else you could so that sort of thing. basically, off season, things are pretty  empty there due to the extreme heat. 

[Arkay]

1 hour ago, LuvMyShows said:

 

One thing I found odd, is that when Brandon's niece Aliyah came to meet them and was running towards them, it really looked like Tayshia intercepted Aliyah so that she would be hugged before Brandon was.  I cannot imagine standing between (literally) a reunion among people who love each other, the way she did.

 

 

Agree agree agree agree agree! I had a visceral reaction to that. Safe environment, yes. Uncle is right there, yes. Apparently buoyant child, yes. However, it was intrusive of Tayshia, a stranger, to swoop in and grab the niece first. You're not so important to Aliyah, Tayshia! That struck me immediately as Tayshia inserting herself where she does not belong, and she physically delayed, even momentarily, Brendan getting to hug his niece whom he missed so much. 

When Clare couldn't muster up even a modicum of interest in anyone who was non-Dale, I thought Tayshia was a welcome relief, though I didn't care for her in earlier seasons. She seemed chipper, and eager to meet each man and give him a fair shot. I no longer see her that way. As time has gone by, she's seemed more and more fake and more selfish, as well. I guess being the star can do that to someone. She's not the first lead to have a histrionic reaction to saying goodbye to someone, but this constant need to eviscerate all the men is worrisome. How much more can they spill about their deepest selves, yet she complains they haven't "opened up" to her? Then she covers that up quickly with a lot of hair, teeth, boobs and shimmying.

That maneuver with the niece showed me how highly she places herself. Being child-friendly is great; if she wanted to portray herself that way, step back for a minute first.

Edited December 16, 2020 by Arkay

[Irlandesa]

36 minutes ago, limecoke said:

Palm Springs in the summer is brutal. I keep wondering why they didn’t film somewhere closer to the ocean. Maybe nothing was big enough given the restrictions but all the indoor flop sweat is puzzling since everything in PS is air-conditioned.

Sometimes the sweat is delayed.  A more likely reason might be related to production and sound.   Since La Quinta isn't set up specifically for filming, I wouldn't be surprised if they shut down the AC units periodically while filming so the sound is clear.

Edited December 16, 2020 by Irlandesa

[waving feather]

I thought Ben seemed plenty emotional when she sent him home. He certainly didn't say much but his insistence on him being fine is obviously his defence mechanism that Tayshia should have picked up on. Or maybe she does know but at the point where she is tired to pry things out of him. Which, understandable and she doesn't get the benefit of seeing his ITMs or interviews. Oh well, they wouldn't have worked in the long run anyway so it's not a big miss opportunity for both.

Is it just me or is Brendan not really into Tayshia? She's into him more than he's into her, for sure. Why else would he bring his niece for the day portion of the date. If I'm one of the contestants I would be making sure I have alone time with the lead as much as possible. They already have very little time together and even less with this season so it puzzled me why he thought it was a great idea for the niece to be there. I would have been annoyed if I were Tayshia. I feel like it's a tactic to avoid intimacy with her.

Zac seems like the only guy who actually really likes her and she likes him as a person, but I don't know if she likes him as her life partner. 

Edited December 17, 2020 by waving feather

[chocolatine]

1 hour ago, greeneyedscorpio said:

For those of us who weren't watching back then, what is The Mesnick?

Words don't do it justice, but luckily, there's a clip:

 

[LakeGal]

I liked the last clip when Zac's brother was telling Tayshia they had watched Bachelor in Paradise.  They all saw her there with JPJ. It made me laugh.

[ECM1231]

5 hours ago, CraftyHazel said:

I’m a little sad for Ben, because I was rather emotionless as a teen and young adult.  My parents were both very pragmatic people and also not very loving or hands-on parents, so affection was not something I really understood.  I don’t actually remember a single hug or kiss from either parent, ever.  I do recall once telling my parents “I love you” when they said goodnight through the bedroom door, and being met with dead silence.  I was all of six years old.

This breaks my heart.  I raised two sons. I grew up in a very affectionate household with mom and dad openly showing affection with each other and their children and lots of "I love you's." I showered both sons with lots of physical affection and always told them I loved them. And as grown men they are not really affectionate at all. They rarely hug. My nephew is the same age as my eldest and whenever he sees me he gives me a giant bear hug, which melts my heart. I complain to my sister about this all of the time and she told me my sons take after their dad, who I have to admit, is not super affectionate nor expressive with love language. His love language is action....if you need a lift to the airport he will be there. If you need a car repair he is there.

Back to Ben and the show...we don't know what kind of childhood he had, although his sister seemed lovely. Maybe his parents were as closed off emotionally as my husband's parents were, which is why I think he is the way he is. Doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings, just means that some folks find it hard to express them.  

I also do think his military service may have contributed to him being closed off, as others have mentioned. And I was pretty angry with Tayshia for being annoyed that Ben didn't really show any emotion at his dumping, or express it the way she wanted.  As others have said, what pure narcissism.  I do agree that Tayshia seems rather shallow. Shallow but with a banging body!

[Just Carol]

22 hours ago, SallyAlbright said:

According to the internet, this Antonia person is from Top Chef and Ben is her trainer.

That is very cool.  Antonia looks much more svelte recently--congrats to her!

 

[saber5055]

1 hour ago, chocolatine said:

Words don't do it justice, but luckily, there's a clip:

I haven't laugh so hard in ages as I did rewatching The Original Mesnick. Thank you for posting!