S03.E07: Love Is A Battlefield

[John M]

2 minutes ago, sharongogo said:

is abdicating her decision making to someone else. 

She has already done that my not moving out of her parents house or pursuing any sort of career or education.

This is just some game to her.

[DaphneCat]

32 minutes ago, Lily247 said:

I couldnt agree with you more. I dont get why people think its not politically correct to NOT want your 19 year old daughter to run off to SYRIA  to marry an Internet boyfriend.

Because Avery hasn't TOLD her that she plans to move to Syria.  Mother is NOT trying to keep her daughter from moving to Syria (because she doesn't know about this plan).  She is trying to keep her daughter from marrying a Muslim.  Hence why it is so reprehensible that she is bashing a religion she knows nothing about.

[Dobian]

9 minutes ago, sharongogo said:

What I find fascinating about Avery's mom is that she's focused on Omar as some threat when it's obvious her daughter already suffered through some trauma. Sure, teens are mercurial and can be easy to change but Mom has a daughter that went from partying and wearing "skimpy" clothes to a girl that won't show any skin, put on weight, joined a religion that prohibits drinking, and is abdicating her decision making to someone else. That same kid who is desperately trying to not have the "bad thing" happen again also can't help putting herself in harms way (maybe not Omar, but for sure a war torn country). Lady, the horse left the barn and your kid is crying out for help. And it's not because of what Omar might do, it's because of something that happened under your roof.

I don't think Avery has suffered any trauma.  Her photos and her description of high school look like she lived a charmed and privileged life.  Her siblings look well-adjusted.  She comes off as independent and bullheaded, someone who is going to get what she wants.  That doesn't sound like someone who has gone through bad things.  When mom brought up Muslim men hitting their wives, her first response was to tell Omar, you better not hit me, and in a pretty intimidating tone.  That doesn't sound like someone who is going to be all subservient.  This girl is strong willed, albeit stupid, and Islam is her current hobby.  She wants to go to Syria and be Mother Theresa.  And Omar is going to have his hands full.  That's all there is to her.

[Lily247]

18 minutes ago, DaphneCat said:

Because Avery hasn't TOLD her that she plans to move to Syria.  Mother is NOT trying to keep her daughter from moving to Syria (because she doesn't know about this plan).  She is trying to keep her daughter from marrying a Muslim.  Hence why it is so reprehensible that she is bashing a religion she knows nothing about.

So, if she hasnt told her mother her plans of running off to Syria, then she obviously has a sneaky nature and perhaps mom knows this. If I saw radical changes in my child, I would be wary too. I would also be wary of my teen daughter wanting to marry a man she met off the internet from far away, regardless of his religion. If he lived in the Middle East - even more so, as he grew up in a place where women's rights have not been Westernized. 

Edited August 27, 2019 by Lily247

[Spike]

1 hour ago, Persnickety1 said:

She couldn't even decipher what "hatt" was when he said "I hatt that girl" referring to his ex.  She asked him if he meant "hate," and he just repeated "I hatt that girl" instead of saying yes or no.  Hell, I'm still not sure if he was saying "I had that girl," "I hate that girl," or if he did indeed "hat that girl" which might be some obscure sexual expression with which I'm not familiar.  

Clearly Rebecca doesn't have communication in her "Things I Need In A Relationship" list of requirements.  

I thought it could be I hit that girl.

[Persnickety1]

8 minutes ago, Spike said:

I thought it could be I hit that girl.

Ohhh, I never even thought of that one, but since he looked pretty angry when he said it, you may very well be right.  

31 minutes ago, Dobian said:

I don't think Avery has suffered any trauma.  Her photos and her description of high school look like she lived a charmed and privileged life.  Her siblings look well-adjusted.  She comes off as independent and bullheaded, someone who is going to get what she wants.  That doesn't sound like someone who has gone through bad things.  When mom brought up Muslim men hitting their wives, her first response was to tell Omar, you better not hit me, and in a pretty intimidating tone.  That doesn't sound like someone who is going to be all subservient.  This girl is strong willed, albeit stupid, and Islam is her current hobby.  She wants to go to Syria and be Mother Theresa.  And Omar is going to have his hands full.  That's all there is to her.

I agree with you.  

I still strongly believe her "conversion" and the Omar relationship is shenanigans to get onto the show.  

I'm pretty damned sure being in the limelight with her gymnastics, etc., then graduating and going into relative obscurity has her jonesing for attention...and she got it, because, viola, here she is on TV.  

I'm not ready to point any fingers at her Long Island Tea drinking mother for any speculated abuse Avery may (or may not) have endured.  That's a serious assumption/allegation and I'm never willing to make that leap based on what we're shown on a TV show.  

I think the kid's an asshole, and sometimes an asshole is...just an asshole.  Most of the time they grow out of it...hopefully sooner rather than later.  

[HunterHunted]

21 hours ago, BoomerRumor said:

I was wondering that too. But someone else commented that in Syria you only need a bachelor's so I think I'll stick my US dentists!

21 hours ago, John M said:

As someone that has known a fair number of doctors both personally and professionally, we put way too much stock in the education/intelligence of doctors.

Don't get me wrong, there are brilliant, great doctors who are highly educated. There are also lots of doctors that's skill set and knowledge seems limited to passing exams and not maiming/killing too many patients.

As someone who has been to an American medical school, only a handful of my undergrad education was useful for my med school courses. My undergrad education was so worthless that I sometimes derisively refer to it as summer camp because I had tons of experiences, but none of it seemed to make a difference in the real world. I now tell kids who are thinking about med school to major in whatever they want, but remember to take the med school prerequisites. One of the brightest most empathetic guys in my med school class had a Bachelors from Berklee. He had been in a number of fairly high profile symphonies for a decade. The recession hit and people weren't funding the arts like they used to. He still had a spot in his orchestra, but he wasn't taking any chances. He went back to college and took all of the med school prerequisites. He was a great student and an amazing doctor.

21 hours ago, mamadrama said:

And other countries' education system and curriculums can be arranged differently than ours in other ways, too. My first two years of college were basically my British husband's equivalent of his last two years of "high school." It takes us around 4-5 years to get a BA, but he was able to graduate with his MA at 22. It's not because I am more educated than him, it's just the way their "high school" is organized. When I started my BA program, I took 2 years of general ed and then 2 years of mostly degree program classes; when he started his BA program, ALL of his classes were degree program classes because he'd already had general ed as part of his "high school"curriculum. 

I'd go to Omar. The best dentist experience I EVER had was with one in Budapest and I couldn't understand a word of what he was saying. 

The reason the American accelerated professional programs work is because there are a ton of random courses in the general studies part of a Bachelors degree. They aren't exactly worthless because a solid liberal arts education is useful, but perhaps less so when you are paying college education tuition to get it. However, it's cartoonishly easy to finish a 4 year degree in 2 or 3 years when you start the kid in college immediately (within a week) after high school graduation. It doesn't allow the kid to lose their study skills. You find that you're in class for the same amount of hours you were in high school.

20 hours ago, John M said:

I completely disagree, her mother is treating her like the burden that she is that has decided to take no steps towards independence or rational decision making anywhere in her life including her religion/relationship.

This isn't about religion, this is about her adult daughter being an idiot and a dependent. Avery, having taken any responsibility for her life, would be able to navigate travel and marriage just fine without her mother's involvement.

I think focusing on the trip is a mistake. But my larger point is that for the 6 months before the trip, her family treated Avery becoming a Muslim like it was the wackiest flakiest thing they'd ever heard of. She could have asked Avery 5 months ago about what is expected of a Muslim woman. She could have talked to Muslim acquaintances about their faith and practice and then used what she learned to have a heartfelt discussion with Avery. She could have reached out to local mosques and attended their open houses. Most mosques in the US have them. The key is to not denigrate her choice.

Fifteen years ago something similar happened in my family. It wasn't a conversion. Although that would happen later with this same sibling. My younger brother had completed the first year of coursework in his PhD program. He suddenly decided out of nowhere that he wanted to drop out and enlist in the military. We could tell that it wasn't a decision born of a sincere desire to serve, but wanting to run from his unhappiness in his graduate program. None of us called his decision dumb, crazy, or stupid. I did tell him that if he truly wanted to help the war effort, he should complete the second year of courses, turn it into a masters, and become an officer because an officer with a masters in engineering is really useful. What we also did was talk to neighbors, friends, co-workers, and classmates who had been in the military or were still in the military. A former graduate school classmate of mine and one of my mom's buddhist friends, both were active military, talked to my brother. None of my family was present. We have no clue what was said. We certainly didn't choose friends who would only denigrate the idea of my brother enlisting. After talkiing to these friends, my brother abandoned this idea. He applied to another university and got his PhD because that's what he decision was about. He was deeply unhappy at his university.

This is what I'm talking about when I say that Avery's mom fucked up. She's not talking about Syria because she doesn't know anything about Syria. She's not worried about Omar because she's not asking questions about Omar that would provide insight into Omar's character. She's asking questions about Islam because she's decided that Islam is an illegitimate choice for Avery. If mom had actually respected Islam enough to sincerely explore it and discuss with Avery, I'm pretty sure that Avery wouldn't be in Lebanon trying to marry Omar. If her mom had done what my family did, Avery might have drifted away from Islam. She might have decided to be a more moderate Muslim. Avery might have stayed a conservative Muslim, but realized how impulsive she was being with Omar. She might have gone to pre-marital counseling at a local mosque. However the problem has always been that her family acted like Islam was the problem and that's how they ended up the way they have.

[Gobi]

1 hour ago, Spike said:

I thought it could be I hit that girl.

 "It's not true, it's a lie! I never hit her! Oh, hai Spike."

[Ijustwantsomechips]

5 hours ago, Drogo said:

Yes, but do you find either of these rats attractive?  No you do not. 

No disrespect meant to Rizzo... though my favorite was the rat who skated on the flattop with butter squares: 

That one is my favorite too Drogo!!! Along with Floyd because he’s always stoned!!!

[Mothra]

2 hours ago, Lily247 said:

I couldnt agree with you more. I dont get why people think its not politically correct to NOT want your 19 year old daughter to run off to SYRIA  to marry an Internet boyfriend.

And, I believe she dresses Muslim style to gain attention, hence going on a TV show after her conversion. 

I don't understand how "political correctness" comes into this at all.

The best I can say about Avery's mother is that she's rightfully concerned about her daughter's apparently fast conversion to Islam (although I don't think we've been told how long Avery was considering it and learning about Islam), and as concerned as any mother would be that her daughter is planning to live in a very volatile section of the world, although a poster has told us there is at least one peaceful enclave in Syria where they could live in safety.

You may be right about her Muslim dress in the US (also I think it helps disguise weight gain), but surely you don't have any argument with her dressing appropriately in Omar's country?  I agree with you that there seems to be a shallowness about Avery, or seemed to be when she was still in the US, but we've seen that she has tried to learn about her new religion and follow its strictures, and I do respect her for that.

Her mother, OTOH, is the adult in this twosome, and her mother is behaving like a petulant teenager.  She seems to be trying to stir up trouble--when every mother should know that this is the very last way to try to convince a teenager of *anything*, which suggests to me that she's behaving in this rude, petulant, childish way for the cameras.

It seems to me that her mother's putative goal is to get Avery to renounce her new religion.  Her way of doing it is to cite random rules she has found on the internet which sound really scary, and to confront Avery with them in the presence of her very calm and polite boyfriend.  If these were genuine concerns, why throw them out in his presence?  Her rudeness--not political incorrectness--is appalling.  And what better way to make Avery dig in to her new religion than to criticize it in front of her boyfriend?

Unlike most if not all of these trans-oceanic pairings, this one seems sensible and barring the religion/location concerns--which are real--Avery's mother has nothing to complain about.  The two of them are age-appropriate; they are comparable in appearance; at least one of them can earn a living and support them; nobody has a criminal record; and god help us all neither has a child being dragged into a mess.

I do not see "political correctness" being involved at all.

[RealReality]

If Avery comes off as less than sincere in her conversion I think it's because the only thing I've heard her say is that she wanted to convert for the structure.  And any religion should be about something more than that.  Because as someone else pointed out...she could have joined the military for that.  There is probably more to it, but I feel like that's all we've gotten from her.  And that IS a superficial reason. 

But, to her credit, at least on her superficial level she appears to try harder than anyone to respect the culture and follow the rules. 

[Lily247]

18 minutes ago, Mothra said:

I don't understand how "political correctness" comes into this at all.

The best I can say about Avery's mother is that she's rightfully concerned about her daughter's apparently fast conversion to Islam (although I don't think we've been told how long Avery was considering it and learning about Islam), and as concerned as any mother would be that her daughter is planning to live in a very volatile section of the world, although a poster has told us there is at least one peaceful enclave in Syria where they could live in safety.

You may be right about her Muslim dress in the US (also I think it helps disguise weight gain), but surely you don't have any argument with her dressing appropriately in Omar's country?  I agree with you that there seems to be a shallowness about Avery, or seemed to be when she was still in the US, but we've seen that she has tried to learn about her new religion and follow its strictures, and I do respect her for that.

Her mother, OTOH, is the adult in this twosome, and her mother is behaving like a petulant teenager.  She seems to be trying to stir up trouble--when every mother should know that this is the very last way to try to convince a teenager of *anything*, which suggests to me that she's behaving in this rude, petulant, childish way for the cameras.

It seems to me that her mother's putative goal is to get Avery to renounce her new religion.  Her way of doing it is to cite random rules she has found on the internet which sound really scary, and to confront Avery with them in the presence of her very calm and polite boyfriend.  If these were genuine concerns, why throw them out in his presence?  Her rudeness--not political incorrectness--is appalling.  And what better way to make Avery dig in to her new religion than to criticize it in front of her boyfriend?

Unlike most if not all of these trans-oceanic pairings, this one seems sensible and barring the religion/location concerns--which are real--Avery's mother has nothing to complain about.  The two of them are age-appropriate; they are comparable in appearance; at least one of them can earn a living and support them; nobody has a criminal record; and god help us all neither has a child being dragged into a mess.

I do not see "political correctness" being involved at all.

This is bringing me back to the Katherine Lester story (the teen who ran away to Jordan for her Myspace love). I would never want a female child of mine to move to Lebanon or Syria, even If there is a so called "safe" city, even though the entire country of Syria has been deemed officially unsafe.

Teen girls making rash decisions = recipe for disaster. 

[sagittarius sue]

On 8/26/2019 at 4:15 AM, mamadrama said:

On 8/26/2019 at 3:41 AM, HunterHunted said:

She pulled the same shit with Jesse. On the taxi ride from the airport. He's trying to tell her about the city and the sights and she says it feels like home and she can see herself living there. Like try to spend more than an hour on foreign soil before you start proclaiming that you want to move there. Darcey is an immature lunatic. Luckily her ex has custody of the girls.

She would literally up and move to the Siberia in January if some man dangled a proposal and diamond ring in front of her. 

I remember her on that taxi ride from the airport, and she talked about wanting to see the diamond museum.  Right!  I wouldn't even think of that when visiting Amsterdam.

[John M]

2 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

I think focusing on the trip is a mistake. But my larger point is that for the 6 months before the trip, her family treated Avery becoming a Muslim like it was the wackiest flakiest thing they'd ever heard of. She could have asked Avery 5 months ago about what is expected of a Muslim woman. She could have talked to Muslim acquaintances about their faith and practice and then used what she learned to have a heartfelt discussion with Avery. She could have reached out to local mosques and attended their open houses. Most mosques in the US have them. The key is to not denigrate her choice.

I think her mother treated it like every other lark her daughter has been so super, super serious about until she got bored with it.

I don't think Avery is serious about converting to Islam, I think she is fond of the costumes and the theatrics and about to make some serious live decisions based on them that she doesn't even understand because she is emotional and mentally immature even for a 19 year old.

And I know multiple people like this, one week they are super into photography so they buy a bunch of photography equipment and take all these classes and are going to be a professional photographer, 6 months later and it's metal detecting, no interest in photography, 6 months after that it cold brew craft coffee with a $1,000 imported coffee machine and then they realize the don't even like coffee so we have moved on to spiritual mysticism with a bunch of special candles and crystals. 

Edited August 27, 2019 by John M

[magemaud]

19 minutes ago, John M said:

And I know multiple people like this, one week they are super into photography so they buy a bunch of photography equipment and take all these classes and are going to be a professional photographer, 6 months later and it's metal detecting, no interest in photography, 6 months after that it cold brew craft coffee with a $1,000 imported coffee machine and then they realize the don't even like coffee so we have moved on to spiritual mysticism with a bunch of special candles and crystals. 

Kind of like Andreeeeiiiii and his truck driving idea

[Mothra]

2 hours ago, Lily247 said:

This is bringing me back to the Katherine Lester story (the teen who ran away to Jordan for her Myspace love). I would never want a female child of mine to move to Lebanon or Syria, even If there is a so called "safe" city, even though the entire country of Syria has been deemed officially unsafe.

Teen girls making rash decisions = recipe for disaster. 

I agree with you.  I wouldn't want my male or female child moving to a war-torn nation, period, even if their motives were of the purest--they were part of Doctors without Borders, say, or a UN peacekeeping force.

My problem with Avery's mother is, first of all, she is the rudest person I've seen on this show for a long time.  I was brought up to show respect for everyone, especially to people I don't agree with.  My papaw said, "Be nice to everybody because you never know who's going to be on the jury," and he was right.

Her rudeness compounds the futility of what she is trying to do--talk Avery out of being a Muslim.  Leaving aside the war-torn nation and even the engagement to Omar, I'm sure it's maddening to see your goofy daughter adopt a religion that has been so much in the news since 2001, and not in a good way.

Everyone who's raised a child knows that the one way you *won't* get the kid to do what you want her to do is to pick at the desired object/person--my parents hated my teenage boyfriend (the one who was such a good kisser) and they tried to be subtle in pointing out his flaws, but even their very careful criticizing of him annoyed me and kind of forced me into ridiculous defenses of the things they criticized him for.  I suspect it's pretty much the same when a parent criticizes a new religion, be it Islam or Scientology--the more you criticize it, no matter how pure your motives, the harder you kid is going to defend and cling to it.  The fact that Avery's mom decided to do this directly to Omar, her host in his country, takes this all to a new level, and is extremely rude as well as being ill-advised.

The horse's ghost is begging me to stop beating it--what do I think I am, a Muslim husband?

[MajorNelson]

You know even if things go well with Avery and Omar, for this whole K1 thing to work, motherAvery is going to be financially responsible for him, and I just have no idea why this mother who acts as concerned as she does at this point would even countenance doing that.  😲

[Dobian]

 

 

 

 

11 minutes ago, Mothra said:

Her rudeness compounds the futility of what she is trying to do--talk Avery out of being a Muslim.  Leaving aside the war-torn nation and even the engagement to Omar, I'm sure it's maddening to see your goofy daughter adopt a religion that has been so much in the news since 2001, and not in a good way.

I'm starting to believe what others have said, that goofy Avery, the attention-seeking former cheerleader, was watching 90 Days one night and cooked up this whole plan to "convert" to Islam, post on a Muslim dating site, get engaged to a clean-cut Muslim guy, and contact TLC.

[John M]

I think the issue is that it is a pattern of ridiculous behavior with Avery and her mother just wants to be done with what she knows is a farce by her childish daughter.

Avery is perfectly free to do this on her own, she could get her own place, practice her religion, save up, travel, marry Omar, not be on a trashy TV show.

If you want to be treated like an adult, act like an adult.

[doyouevengohere]

Tim and Jessica- He totally looks like Jim Carey as the Grinch.  I kinda hate him, but this feels like a romcom movie and I hope that Jessica treats him terrible and he realizes Vanessa is the one and he runs back to her with red roses.

Darcy and Tom- I'm sorry but the shape of Tom's head and his fray of curls at the top of his noggin make him look like Sloth from the Goonies.  Poor drunk desperate Darcy; I feel so bad for her daughters.  Am I wrong to hope Jessie appears at some point?

Avery and Omar- Omar seems handsome, polite, and decent. I already like him tons more than Avery.  If anyone messes up this relationship it will be Avery.  Her mom is totally right that she flits from thing to thing and down the line will not like being told what to do or being submissive.  I think her mom is rude but she is totally there to bust Avery's chops.

Ben and A- Ben is a total nerd but seems nice enough.  They are both weird but sorta cute.  I think the only reason he is on this show is to earn enough for her bride price rather quickly.

Ceasar- I can't believe any of his storyline is true.  If it is, he needs to like have a caregiver or something b/c he can not make his own choices in life.

Angela- I still can't believe someone like her exists.

Angela's other daugher and greasy Rasputin- gross and scary.

[magemaud]

On 8/26/2019 at 4:41 AM, HunterHunted said:

She pulled the same shit with Jesse. On the taxi ride from the airport. He's trying to tell her about the city and the sights and she says it feels like home and she can see herself living there.

I'm waiting for Tom to change the subject and say, "Oh look, a goat!" 

[mrsh]

On 8/22/2019 at 6:26 PM, Mothra said:

Yes!  And in so many variations, usually involving their children (whom they all Put First).  I haven't seen so many threats since we watched Father Libby say he was going to cut off Libby and Andale.  First rule of dealing with children and men who are interested only in sex:  Don't make empty threats.  If you say you're going to do it, you *must* by the power of Greyskull do it.

I know the bolded was a typo but I almost choked on a potato chip. Andale 😂😂😂

[alegtostandon]

In all honesty,  none of us know what transpired between Avery & her mom before 2 weeks ago.  In my previous post, I was simply expressing my feelings,  as a parent of a 19 year old girl who is making a major life change.  I am not talking about her converting, but her plans to marry a man she does not know.  And,  realistically, they are in neutral territory,  not Syria, where Omar is from or US.  We do not know anything about Omar... if he is really a dentist.   We've seen a lot of people pretending to be something they are not on this show.  And,  remember,  Avery confessed her "secret" to her friends parents,  telling them not to tell her mom.   How many parents on here would keep that type of a secret from a teenager's parent?   

When I was 19, because of some trauma I had gone through,  I felt lost.  My stepmom,  who was an Orthodox Jew, sent me to Israel to live on a kibbutz, I was convinced that I was going to convert to Judaism.  That lasted about 3 months.  Thinking back to those days,  and I'm talking the late 70's, if I would have met Jim Jones,  I probably would have gone to Guyana.  I was searching for something to give me inner peace and a sense of security.  I finally realized that I had it all along... with my family who knew me.  I feel Avery is the same way.   Marrying Omar is a huge decision, a decision that will not be so easy to walk away.  Has nothing to do with religion,  it's a decision that will follow her the rest of her life.  

These are all my own opinions and thoughts.   

[DaphneCat]

1 hour ago, alegtostandon said:

In all honesty,  none of us know what transpired between Avery & her mom before 2 weeks ago.  In my previous post, I was simply expressing my feelings,  as a parent of a 19 year old girl who is making a major life change.  I am not talking about her converting, but her plans to marry a man she does not know.  And,  realistically, they are in neutral territory,  not Syria, where Omar is from or US.  We do not know anything about Omar... if he is really a dentist.   We've seen a lot of people pretending to be something they are not on this show.  And,  remember,  Avery confessed her "secret" to her friends parents,  telling them not to tell her mom.   How many parents on here would keep that type of a secret from a teenager's parent?   

When I was 19, because of some trauma I had gone through,  I felt lost.  My stepmom,  who was an Orthodox Jew, sent me to Israel to live on a kibbutz, I was convinced that I was going to convert to Judaism.  That lasted about 3 months.  Thinking back to those days,  and I'm talking the late 70's, if I would have met Jim Jones,  I probably would have gone to Guyana.  I was searching for something to give me inner peace and a sense of security.  I finally realized that I had it all along... with my family who knew me.  I feel Avery is the same way.   Marrying Omar is a huge decision, a decision that will not be so easy to walk away.  Has nothing to do with religion,  it's a decision that will follow her the rest of her life.  

These are all my own opinions and thoughts.   

These are very good points.  But Avery's mother is NOT focusing on the things a normal mother would.  She hasn't mentioned the challenges of getting married very young.  She has not mentioned the fact that Avery and Omar have only known each other for 6 months and it is an online relationship.  They have no idea what it is like to spend time together.  They could discover they run out of things to talk about after a few hours and basically find each other boring.  (Since they are committed to not being physical they could use a visit to REALLY get to know each other.)  She has not asked if Avery and Omar have discussed the big issues in a marriage - children, finances, careers, etc. - generally are they on the same page.  Because she is under the assumption that Avery is returning to the states she has not mentioned the challenges of a long distance marriage.  Instead, she has been lamenting the fact that Avery can no longer wear booty shorts or get drunk.  She then brings up insulting "facts" to Omar about his religion - a religion her daughter has also chosen.  If she supported Avery in her decision to convert (even if she thinks it is a fad her current attitude only guarantees that Avery will dig in her heels even more) and seemed open to the idea of Omar, Avery MIGHT have been willing to take it slower.  After all, this is before the 90 days so there is no time pressure.  If Avery is just doing this for the exposure, she might have been able to convince Avery to let TLC film her visits with Omar (a la Nicole's numerous visits.)  By making it VERY clear she has no use for Islam and does not want Avery to marry a Muslim she is pushing Avery in to a corner - almost guaranteeing Avery will marry him.

[Farley]

For Avery's dumb Mom, if you're so opposed to all of this, don't buy your flighty, whim of the month daughter a wedding gown.  Make her or her fiance pay for it. "You take cards right?"  Completely inane.

[Kangatush]

One of my favorite things about Darcey is her ability to edit history.  She keeps harping that she and Tom have been together for 4 years.  No, you may have met 4 years ago, but you both were in serious relationships with other people during that time (remember Jesse?  You should since you can't seem to stop talking about him).  You were not dating Tom, even if you knew him.  Close your legs, don't mention marriage, stop drinking so much.  You might be surprised at what happens.

[RealReality]

7 minutes ago, Kangatush said:

One of my favorite things about Darcey is her ability to edit history.  She keeps harping that she and Tom have been together for 4 years.  No, you may have met 4 years ago, but you both were in serious relationships with other people during that time (remember Jesse?  You should since you can't seem to stop talking about him).  You were not dating Tom, even if you knew him.  Close your legs, don't mention marriage, stop drinking so much.  You might be surprised at what happens.

Oh no, but its so romantic....like a fairy tale.....Darcy was the head cheerleader and she was with the sexy jock bad boy Jesse.  But secretly straighlaced nerdy tom was pining for her from the wings.....just waiting all those years for Darcy to realize that he's her one true love.  

And then tom whips off his glasses and cheerleader Darcy realizes that nerdy tom is really a hunk.....and then everyone breaks into a well choreographed dance routine.....and credits roll......

[Kangatush]

23 hours ago, RealReality said:

Zied had a tough time getting it out in English, but "this is too sexy for my culture" came through to mebefore they left.   I believe, he said, on multiple occasions that she wasn't in America, which made the message clear to me.    To which she proclaimed that she would wear a jacket to cover everything up because he had refused to go out with her putting her wonky boobs on full display otherwise.  

I think the other reason I was slightly more Team Rebecca is that they were specifically going to a nightclub.  In my head, that tends to have a different dress code than just walking around town.  Kind of like if we're going to a place that serves alcohol, bare arms aren't going to be so radical.

[alegtostandon]

1 hour ago, DaphneCat said:

These are very good points.  But Avery's mother is NOT focusing on the things a normal mother would.  She hasn't mentioned the challenges of getting married very young.  She has not mentioned the fact that Avery and Omar have only known each other for 6 months and it is an online relationship.  They have no idea what it is like to spend time together.  They could discover they run out of things to talk about after a few hours and basically find each other boring.  (Since they are committed to not being physical they could use a visit to REALLY get to know each other.)  She has not asked if Avery and Omar have discussed the big issues in a marriage - children, finances, careers, etc. - generally are they on the same page.  Because she is under the assumption that Avery is returning to the states she has not mentioned the challenges of a long distance marriage.  Instead, she has been lamenting the fact that Avery can no longer wear booty shorts or get drunk.  She then brings up insulting "facts" to Omar about his religion - a religion her daughter has also chosen.  If she supported Avery in her decision to convert (even if she thinks it is a fad her current attitude only guarantees that Avery will dig in her heels even more) and seemed open to the idea of Omar, Avery MIGHT have been willing to take it slower.  After all, this is before the 90 days so there is no time pressure.  If Avery is just doing this for the exposure, she might have been able to convince Avery to let TLC film her visits with Omar (a la Nicole's numerous visits.)  By making it VERY clear she has no use for Islam and does not want Avery to marry a Muslim she is pushing Avery in to a corner - almost guaranteeing Avery will marry him.

I agree with you,  Daphnecat.  I think of all of the 90 Day people,  the very young ones are painful for me to sit back & watch & make fun of.  

I always think back to when my stepdaughter was 15, cutting school,  hanging out with older guys,  etc.  The response we got  from her when we took her to counseling was "it's my life,  I'm not hurting anyone else."   I said to her what my dad had said to me,  "there is one other person you are hurting,  and no,  it's not me,  it's the person you are going to be in 10 years.".  Of course,  now at the age of 40 & 5 marriages later,  she wishes she would have thought more about that at the time!   I guess my dad was more persuasive than I was,  lol! 

[Baltimore Betty]

On ‎8‎/‎21‎/‎2019 at 11:51 PM, RealReality said:

I think Mrs Hanson meant Darcy, but sometimes my autotext wants to call her other names too.

Darcy, Idiot, Embarrassment to Her Children, Bad Actress, Mentally Touched...all the same name in my book.

[Mothra]

7 hours ago, mrsh said:

I know the bolded was a typo but I almost choked on a potato chip. Andale 😂😂😂

No typo.  I learned to read and write using Fonix is Fun.

[Angry Moldovan]

21 hours ago, AnnMarie17 said:

I live for your screen name!  🤣 Don't terrorize me with your screen name...  😂

I love my profile pix of Andraaaai in deep thought, it’s such a juxtaposition 😉

[Normades]

I think with Avery, her mother didn't pay much attention to the conversion because Avery has probably done things like this to get attention.  Didn't they say she was conservative Christian like her friend's family before this?  The mother probably thought not much would come of this, but she was sorely mistaken.  I also think Avery liked the attention she got walking around the US wearing her hijab.  Now she will be a drop of water in the ocean since all the women will dress similarly.  I don't think she'll like that either.  I do have a feeling there is some serious underlying problem with her, but that's my opinion.  It's a sad scary situation.

[AnnMarie17]

1 hour ago, Angry Moldovan said:

I love my profile pix of Andraaaai in deep thought, it’s such a juxtaposition 😉

You give him far more credit than he deserves. I  believe that's his "smelling my finger" pose.  🤢

[John M]

All these suggestions that Avery's mother should use rational arguments with irrational idiot daughter make me wonder if you have ever spent time with someone like Avery before.

Avery's mother is just trying to make this whole thing too annoying to go through with because she knows her daughter will eventually get bored with it and move on to juice cleanses or moon crystals or whatever else she can make about her.

Edited August 28, 2019 by John M

[libgirl2]

11 hours ago, doyouevengohere said:

Tim and Jessica- He totally looks like Jim Carey as the Grinch.  I kinda hate him, but this feels like a romcom movie and I hope that Jessica treats him terrible and he realizes Vanessa is the one and he runs back to her with red roses.

OMG! You are right! 

[doyouevengohere]

2 hours ago, Normades said:

I think with Avery, her mother didn't pay much attention to the conversion because Avery has probably done things like this to get attention.  Didn't they say she was conservative Christian like her friend's family before this?  The mother probably thought not much would come of this, but she was sorely mistaken.  I also think Avery liked the attention she got walking around the US wearing her hijab.  Now she will be a drop of water in the ocean since all the women will dress similarly.  I don't think she'll like that either.  I do have a feeling there is some serious underlying problem with her, but that's my opinion.  It's a sad scary situation.

Avery strikes me as a girl that has had a bad or traumatic experience that she hasn't fully processed or even acknowledged  so she is emerging herself into experiences that will make her forget who she was and allow her to pretend to be someone else.  She seems to be running far away from her problems, but they will emerge eventually.  I can't snark on her too much b/c if that is true , it's truly awful.  I feel sad for her.  She lucked out b/c Omar seems to be a truly nice and standup guy so far.  But if she doesn't deal with her past (whatever it is) then it's going to keep showing up in her present and future until she does deal with it and her avoidance of the issue will hurt those around her.  I hope I'm wrong though and she's just a flighty stupid 19 year old girl.  If something happened to her before, she probably is embarrassed and did not tell her family and could possibly be in denial; so her mom has no idea and is just being rude to her to try and knock her down a few pegs and get her to abandon this marriage idea.

Edited August 28, 2019 by doyouevengohere

[Dobian]

 

 

 

 

On 8/26/2019 at 10:47 AM, poeticlicensed said:

Yes. I live in FL also and it cracks me up when people come here on vacation and decide that they want to live here and have no idea what life is like outside of theme parks and the beach. I live about an hour from the beach but I can't even remember the last time I went there. 

I live about 20 minutes from the ocean in northern California and never go there.  The water is freezing and the beaches are rocky.  It's a place to go if you're a surfer or you like to photograph pretty coastal scenery.

[doyouevengohere]

On 8/26/2019 at 5:49 AM, HunterHunted said:

People are so worried about Avery somehow becoming an ISIS bride when the one who is actually in danger of this is dumb ass Darcey. 

No one wants Darcy , not even ISIS; she would corupt the other brides with her deeply ingrained American whore ways and she's too old to have babies.

[PamelaMaeSnap]

On 8/26/2019 at 7:50 AM, DiamondGirl said:

Ok, confession time:  when Tim said he has to tell Jeniffer (?) a secret that she might not like, did you think it could be that he used to be a woman?

And I'm not 100% convinced that Jeniffer was not once a man. So they'd have one more thing in common (which would mean one thing in common). 

[Petem]

Any idea where I can watch these episodes in the UK?

[Gobi]

2 minutes ago, Petem said:

Any idea where I can watch these episodes in the UK?

You can watch it on tlc.com. The episodes unlock after they have been aired.

[Petem]

5 minutes ago, Gobi said:

You can watch it on tlc.com. The episodes unlock after they have been aired.

Not available outside the US unfortunately. Thanks for your reply regardless. 

[Gobi]

8 minutes ago, Petem said:

Not available outside the US unfortunately. Thanks for your reply regardless. 

Sorry. There's also an app (tlcgo), I don't know if it's available in the UK, and from what I hear it's a pain to use (mostly commercials).

[RealReality]

3 hours ago, John M said:

All these suggestions that Avery's mother should use rational arguments with irrational idiot daughter make me wonder if you have ever spent time with someone like Avery before.

Avery's mother is just trying to make this whole thing too annoying to go through with because she knows her daughter will eventually get bored with it and move on to juice cleanses or moon crystals or whatever else she can make about her.

I think if anyone has dealt with an Avery personality you know that any of these over the top attempts to stop them or make things "annoying" makes them dig in their heels and adds fuel to the fire.  

Had mother Avery shrugged her shoulders six months ago and went with it, none of this would be happening and she'd be well on her way to having her drunken daughter dressing like a skank again.  

But I betcha Avery's mom pushed and pushed and pushed and pushed and this is not even close to the first time she has Googled "muslim (insert term)" found something offensive and alarmist and read it off in an attempt to "talk avery out" of this or make it annoying. 

She probably did the same thing when Avery was a vegetarian for a few months and eventually just gave in, which took the wind out of Avery's sails and she started eating meat again. 

Avery's mom is acting ridiculous.  Not only is she likely to make Avery dig in her heels, but IF they stay together or have a grandchild she is almost guaranteeing she gets no face time with him/her. 

38 minutes ago, Petem said:

Any idea where I can watch these episodes in the UK?

There is a site called Dailymotion where I'm forced to go to get my apprenticeUK fix.  Have you tried that?  They may have the show there.  I know people upload them on YouTube too.

[Takitaki]

I've lived in London for almost a decade and I'm so fed up of it. It's charming to visit here, but hard to live. I HATE the tube with a passion!

With Jesse and Darcy, the editing sure made it look like Jesse was in the wrong, but this season they're really showing Darcy's true colours! I want to give her a make-under so bad. I've been a bit too drunk and cried in the past too, but the difference is, I feel embarrassed the next day and vow to not do it again. She's not even embarrassed she was a drunk mess on the very first night they met.

I had to google rice-a-roni and it sounds terrible.

I don't get the nitpicking about Avery not wearing a burkha. She's wearing an abaya or similar with a hijab, while it's not a burkha, that's besides the point. The point is she dresses modestly and covers herself, whether it's a burkha or not.

Omar is old enough to be a dentist, in the UK dental school is 5 years and if you start when you're 17/18, you'll graduate at 22/23. You don't need a bachelor's degree to go to dental school, dental school IS your degree (i.e you get a Bachelors degree in dentistry/dental surgery). It's similar in a lot of other countries.

I don't like her mom but if anyone close to me did a 180 on their life all of a sudden, I'd be worried, whatever the religion was. I've seen it before with people that are easy to brainwash, and it usually happens more than once. I see why her mom is worried that she's changed everything about her overnight. Her mum is still dumb as a bag of rocks though. I found the way Omar was smirking at her questions a bit unnerving though; it's like he knows he can do whatever he wants once he marries Avery and knows she won't be able to do shit about it.

Zied's problem wasn't that R was dressing wrong, he just can't take it when other men look at her. Honestly in Tunisia I wouldn't expect to cover my shoulders in tourist areas, especially  a bar, and I travel quite a bit- they're not in Saudi Arabia! I also don't understand what the big deal is if someone is "looking at her". So what? A normal person would pay no mind and enjoy their evening, but jealous greaseball Zied cannot. It won't be any different in the US (other than there will likely be less eyes on her). I've travelled with a female friend who has both sleeves tattooeed and people do look and want to know more, pretty much irregardless of the country.

Tim meeting the little girl have me creep vibes. Maybe I'm overreaching but it struck me as a slightly strange exchange. I can't also tell if he was born a male, whether he is gay/straight, which sort of adds to his creepiness. He's the type whose face won't move in another 10 years with all the botox. Jennifer seems like the type of woman who'd want an alpha male, so not sure why he's even there.
 

[suzeecat]

On ‎8‎/‎27‎/‎2019 at 11:25 AM, magemaud said:

I’ll admit if I glanced over at the person sitting right next to me and realized his or her arm was covered in colorful tattooed art, I’d have to stare. I’d be wondering why they chose that particular design, if it hurt, how much it cost, etc. The guy wasn’t LEERING at her. Anyway, these were the same tats Zied COMMANDED her to show his friends while he sat there proudly enjoying their reactions. 

100% right there!  I am not a tattoo expert so I couldn't say if hers are well done or not.  But, isn't the whole idea of getting a tattoo the fact that it is ART?  I mean, why spend $3,000 on putting art on your body and have a problem with people looking at it?  Seems like that's the whole point.  And yes, I would want to take it all in, it seemed like there was a lot going on there, and from what I've seen on tattoo tv shows, there's a story behind all of them.  And from what Zied said, it's very unusual to see tattoos, especially on women.  So, yeah, look!  Ask questions!  Conversate!  Did Zied not know she had the tattoos before they met in person?  Pretty sure he did, so, um deal with it, bro.  He's unbalanced. 

[Spike]

1 hour ago, Petem said:

Not available outside the US unfortunately. Thanks for your reply regardless. 

I think you can use those VPN sites that mask your IP address.

[Spike]

1 hour ago, Takitaki said:

I also don't understand what the big deal is if someone is "looking at her". 

I doubt they have lustful looks on their faces.  More like eek.

[KateHearts]

On 8/26/2019 at 11:34 AM, Adeejay said:

 Plus, he put the ring in his carry on. Really?

He actually checked the ring.