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Ashley & Jay: Giving Us the D Every {Sunday} Night

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So the first episode is already available online. Jay says he lost his virginity when he was eight years old! Not okay in my book in fact it's kind of horrible, but he doesn't seem to see any problem with it. He just sees himself as sexually precocious.

This guy is gonna have a LOT of problems with boundaries!

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On ‎10‎/‎10‎/‎2018 at 1:45 PM, ALittleShelfish said:

Well their promo pic is right next to my workplace.  HOW DID I MISS THIS????  I'm the worst resident of the area, I can't even find Narkyia (who lives here too).  I'm sorry guys.

We're almost neighbors!  **Waves out of window, about 50 miles north of you**

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4 hours ago, CoachWristletJen said:

So the first episode is already available online. Jay says he lost his virginity when he was eight years old! Not okay in my book in fact it's kind of horrible, but he doesn't seem to see any problem with it. He just sees himself as sexually precocious.

This guy is gonna have a LOT of problems with boundaries!

eight. years. old.

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Let's all not jump to conclusions that Jay was raped.  He could have been fooling around with a girl in his third grade class and he could have been the aggressor.  We don't know.

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2 minutes ago, Blizzard said:

Let's all not jump to conclusions that Jay was raped.  He could have been fooling around with a girl in his third grade class and he could have been the aggressor.  We don't know.

If that’s true, then what were those kids exposed to that made them want to mimic sexual activity at EIGHT. Either way it’s horrible. 

What I know about the world it’s more likely Jay was abused by an adult than “playing doctor” with another kid. I don’t think Jay should be ashamed (it’s not his fault) but it’s not a sign of “sexual prowess” like he is making it out to be. 

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6 minutes ago, Blizzard said:

Let's all not jump to conclusions that Jay was raped.  He could have been fooling around with a girl in his third grade class and he could have been the aggressor.  We don't know.

...or he could be full of it. Who knows if this is even true. Maybe he was assaulted...or a game of 'doctor'...we will likely never know.

Edited by sainte-chapelle
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Long time lurker. Made an account just to comment on the blonde from Pennsylvania with the kid from Jamaica. Lemme get this straight, she is bringing s practical stranger, a hypersexualized boy, that she barely knows, who lost his virginity at EIGHT YEARS OLD, to come live with her. Correct? 

*sarcasm* Good thing we never hear about any women's boyfriends sexually abusing their (step)kids in the news! That NEVER happens! Whew! She better be glad we live in a world where such an atrocious act doesn't exist!

This boy has been hypersexualized from an abnormally young age.  He acted proud to announce such a thing on television. And this idiot woman who obviously is suffering from arrested development, is going to move such a person in a home with her two kids. I presume. Every time I watch the news outlets and see some woman with a boyfriend abusing her kids, I always wonder how such a thing could happen. And it happens frequently.

I guess it's from "putting your kids first". Just freaking WOW. I'm beyond disturbed. 

Edited by Cammi
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10 hours ago, Blizzard said:

Let's all not jump to conclusions that Jay was raped.  He could have been fooling around with a girl in his third grade class and he could have been the aggressor.  We don't know.

I think I have to rewind the pvr to the part. I thought the fact that he lost his v card at 8 and that he stole his dad's gf was the same incident??? Gawd. So confusing these people's lives. Like a soap opera.

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Jay's dancing and backflipping was unbearable to watch. Ashley appeared to be entertained, but that hyper jumping around is like having a bored kid stuck inside the house. So now, she has three kids to watch. Wonder which one will get in trouble first. 

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32 minutes ago, greekmom said:

I think I have to rewind the pvr to the part. I thought the fact that he lost his v card at 8 and that he stole his dad's gf was the same incident??? Gawd. So confusing these people's lives. Like a soap opera.

No they weren’t the same incident. 

 

I believe he was likely sexually abused at 8 by an adult, and has spun a narrative that he “lost his virginity”. I do NOT think this was a case of two kids playing “doctor”.  Quite sad, child victims of sexual abuse have their own healing to go through but young boys have different layers given our patriarchal attitudes about sex. 

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More concerning IMO is that Jay will have an influential role in Ashley's boys' lives. His attitude about having sex at a young age is not what any good mother would want around her kids. YMMV of course.

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Ashley's best friend capsulized A's situ in a nutshell.  I can't remember what exactly she said (and she said it well!) but it was along the lines of "Ashley just wants to be in love"

Ashley:  behold the wreckage of all the 90-dayers who came before you.  When you place being in love above all else(cough kids cough), you make very poor poor choices.  Shame on you.

I want to smack these people with young kids who do this nonsense. 

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9 hours ago, Horrified said:

Ashley's best friend capsulized A's situ in a nutshell.  I can't remember what exactly she said (and she said it well!) but it was along the lines of "Ashley just wants to be in love"

Ashley:  behold the wreckage of all the 90-dayers who came before you.  When you place being in love above all else(cough kids cough), you make very poor poor choices.  Shame on you.

I want to smack these people with young kids who do this nonsense. 

I agree that they should be punished, but I'm not sure I'd smack them with young kids.  Seems mean to the kids you're using.  Maybe try a clue-by-four.

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5 hours ago, sconstant said:

I agree that they should be punished, but I'm not sure I'd smack them with young kids.  Seems mean to the kids you're using.  Maybe try a clue-by-four.

lol...I see what you did there. 

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On ‎10‎/‎22‎/‎2018 at 11:23 AM, pollywood said:

is mechanicsburg near melanie and devar's town?

No, but it is near where Narkiyah (not sure I'm spelling that) was from, with her "Nigerian Prince".

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On 10/21/2018 at 7:36 PM, sainte-chapelle said:

...or he could be full of it. Who knows if this is even true. Maybe he was assaulted...or a game of 'doctor'...we will likely never know.

And likely I'll never care either way. These idiots go on shows like this to pimp themselves as someone worthy of being a 'reality famewhore' - reality and fame being said here using the lowest possible standards - and they'll do and say anything to extend their 15 minutes in the spotlight no matter how heinous or pathetic they come across. So yeah, whatever Jay's backstory is, right now he's an egotistical little shithead who thinks cheating on women, sleeping with his father's women, and using women for their money is fun and something to brag about. He can fuck right off any time now, and without a drop of empathy from moi.

What's sad is that like all TLC and BravHo shows, the first season is usually interesting and good, then the network fuckwits decide they need to inject the dramaz to keep us entertained so the 'reality' flies out the window and instead we get seasons that become progressively watered down so much with unnecessary drama and loser characters, that we completely lose the essence of the show that we liked in the premiere season. For this franchise, I assume it's all fabricated or producer driven drivel at this point and just cant take it too seriously. Which is sad because I actually found it more interesting to watch people who actually are decent normal people navigating this visa process.

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On 10/17/2018 at 11:53 AM, CoachWristletJen said:

So the first episode is already available online. Jay says he lost his virginity when he was eight years old! Not okay in my book in fact it's kind of horrible, but he doesn't seem to see any problem with it. He just sees himself as sexually precocious.

This guy is gonna have a LOT of problems with boundaries!

He "most definitely" lied about losing it at 8. It sounds like something teenagers say to sound cool. I doubt it's even possible (though everyone please dont jump on me for this, I'm not a MD) for an 8 year old, unless it was some kind of sexual abuse being done to him by someone older. But I dont want to speculate. 

And by the way, what is wrong with Ashley ? She is beautiful and if she would maybe date a different type of man - as in not the player, douchey they type that she is probably attracted to - she could maybe finally achieve the happiness she is looking for. Because it ain't with this child. When he laughed about saying another American woman just for her to send him money, I was immediately done with him and wanted him off my screen. 

Edited by Lily247
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12 hours ago, Lily247 said:

He "most definitely" lied about losing it at 8. It sounds like something teenagers say to sound cool. I doubt it's even possible (though everyone please dont jump on me for this, I'm not a MD) for an 8 year old, unless it was some kind of sexual abuse being done to him by someone older. But I dont want to speculate. 

And by the way, what is wrong with Ashley ? She is beautiful and if she would maybe date a different type of man - as in not the player, douchey they type that she is probably attracted to - she could maybe finally achieve the happiness she is looking for. Because it ain't with this child. When he laughed about saying another American woman just for her to send him money, I was immediately done with him and wanted him off my screen. 

I think they are both revolting.   And I think the guy did the deed at a very early age and was into it.  HE'S FROM JAMAICA.  The society there is much different and it is EXTREMELY common for young boys to have sex.  

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7 minutes ago, Rdh1314 said:

I think they are both revolting.   And I think the guy did the deed at a very early age and was into it.  HE'S FROM JAMAICA.  The society there is much different and it is EXTREMELY common for young boys to have sex.  

Really ? I wouldnt know, I've never been there. I have a friend from Cuba who said that it's common there to start dating when you are 10 and marry by 15. I just cant imagine an 8 year old boy being able to have intercourse before puberty but this is too much for me ...

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1 hour ago, Lily247 said:

Really ? I wouldnt know, I've never been there. I have a friend from Cuba who said that it's common there to start dating when you are 10 and marry by 15. I just cant imagine an 8 year old boy being able to have intercourse before puberty but this is too much for me ...

Yes, it is a problem in Jamaica.  There is also a very high ( over 40%) rate of pre-teen/teen pregnancy.   I read that the government wants more education for the kids....

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1 hour ago, Rdh1314 said:

There is also a very high ( over 40%) rate of pre-teen/teen pregnancy.   I read that the government wants more education for the kids....

No kidding ...

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4 minutes ago, Lily247 said:

No kidding ...

No kidding.  And about 20 years ago we went to Jamaica for a vacation.   It's,  how shall I say, a "loose" society as far as sexual relations go.  The hotel manager was creepy and inappropriate. Every one was actually kind of creepy....I was much younger (and better looking at the time) and had black guy after black guy hitting on me.  I'm caucasian and was married, but the "men" there apparently didn't care that my husband was there.  Jamaica is not the United States. 

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For anyone wanting to read more about masculinity and sexuality in Jamaica...

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20100321/lead/lead9.html

I did some work briefly in the Caribbean a decade or so ago, though not in Jamaica but closeby, and was working with some gay men's groups on HIV prevention. It was sad and eye opening to hear their realities about sexuality and masculinity norms in the Caribbean. Overall, and they singled out Jamaican men (many of whom lived on their island) as being the worst of the region, boys are sexualized at much younger ages (though again, an 8 year old cant physically have sex and I do think Jay is lying). Whether that's more of older men telling younger boys that to be a man you have to fuck a lot of women, not be tied down to a woman, not show tender feelings to a woman, etc., or if it's actually showing them porn or live sex or inappropriate touching, I dont really know. But the gay men I worked with told me horrible stories about the Jamaican men - that they believe they must have sex at least once a day - something about recharging their power source - and that they will basically fuck anything with a hole - women, animals, and other men - because to them it's just a way to release their masculinity or some rubbish like that. They also told me that while Jamaican men do have sex with other men, they dont consider themselves gay or bi, and they deeply hate gay/bi men because it challenges their notion of masculine norms. These men I worked with were quite effeminate and I worried about them all the time, I also admired them for being so courageous in the face of such common violence against them. They said while Jamaican men would happily fuck another dude, if they thought they'd get found out, they would mete out serious violence and even death on that person so they wouldn't be able to tell or would be so scared they'd never tell.

Anyway, my point in sharing this is that from what I learned in that region firsthand, Jay probably was introduced to sexuality way too early - though again, I doubt he 'had sex' at age 8! However, I also think he's trying to prove he's a 'badman' - the Jamaican version of a 'playa'. Basically he's full of shit, trying to bravado his way into fame in the eyes of other men in his country. In addition, he comes off as having an effeminate edge to him - does anyone else see that?  I mention it because if he is conflicted about his sexuality, he may well be overtly overcompensating by trying to come off as a 'fuck em and leave em' playboy to hide the fact that he might be gay. Just my two cents...as always, YMMV.

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2 minutes ago, gingerella said:

For anyone wanting to read more about masculinity and sexuality in Jamaica...

http://jamaica-gleaner.com/gleaner/20100321/lead/lead9.html

I did some work briefly in the Caribbean a decade or so ago, though not in Jamaica but closeby, and was working with some gay men's groups on HIV prevention. It was sad and eye opening to hear their realities about sexuality and masculinity norms in the Caribbean. Overall, and they singled out Jamaican men (many of whom lived on their island) as being the worst of the region, boys are sexualized at much younger ages (though again, an 8 year old cant physically have sex and I do think Jay is lying). Whether that's more of older men telling younger boys that to be a man you have to fuck a lot of women, not be tied down to a woman, not show tender feelings to a woman, etc., or if it's actually showing them porn or live sex or inappropriate touching, I dont really know. But the gay men I worked with told me horrible stories about the Jamaican men - that they believe they must have sex at least once a day - something about recharging their power source - and that they will basically fuck anything with a hole - women, animals, and other men - because to them it's just a way to release their masculinity or some rubbish like that. They also told me that while Jamaican men do have sex with other men, they dont consider themselves gay or bi, and they deeply hate gay/bi men because it challengesm their notion of masculine norms. These men I worked with were quite effeminate and I worried about them all the time, I also admired them for being so courageous in the face of such common violence against them. They said while Jamaican men would happily fuck another dude, if they thought they'd get found out, they would mete out serious violence and even death on that person so they wouldn't be able to tell or would be so scared they'd never tell.

Anyway, my point in sharing this is that from what I learned in that region firsthand, Jay probably was introduced to sexuality way too early - though again, I doubt he 'had sex' at age 8! However, I also think he's trying to prove he's a 'badman' - the Jamaican version of a 'playa'. Basically he's full of shit, trying to bravado his way into fame in the eyes of other men in his country. In addition, he comes off as having an effeminate edge to him - does anyone else see that?  I mention it because if he is conflicted about his sexuality, he may well be overtly overcompensating by trying to come off as a 'fuck em and leave em' playboy to hide the fact that he might be gay. Just my two cents...as always, YMMV.

Gingerella...I agree with EVERYTHING  you said. I'm probably more harsh though ....It is disgusting...this young 20 year old ugly Jamaican guy (even Paul and Jorge were better looking) was exposed ( or predisposed) to sexuality at an early age.  It's a hard fact to absorb,  but yeah, an 8 year old can physically have sex.  If you really delve into it , literature says little kids here in the US play "doctor" and it's nothing new.  But we live in the United States...we don't ENCOURAGE early self sexual gratification the way the Jamaican people do. It's in the DNA maybe 

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20 hours ago, Rdh1314 said:

No kidding.  And about 20 years ago we went to Jamaica for a vacation.   It's,  how shall I say, a "loose" society as far as sexual relations go.  The hotel manager was creepy and inappropriate. Every one was actually kind of creepy....I was much younger (and better looking at the time) and had black guy after black guy hitting on me.  I'm caucasian and was married, but the "men" there apparently didn't care that my husband was there.  Jamaica is not the United States. 

It is unkind, unfair and racist to generalize about an entire nation because of one unfortunate vacation 20 years ago and idiots being jackasses on reality TV. 

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1 hour ago, politichick said:

It is unkind, unfair and racist to generalize about an entire nation because of one unfortunate vacation 20 years ago and idiots being jackasses on reality TV. 

I'm not racist against an entire nation. But I find the fact that it's common for very young boys over there to engage in sexual intercourse to be pretty horrible.  We have an opioid crisis in the United States which is maybe even more horrible....I'm not being unkind or "racist" to state a fact about a country.

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I thought homosexuality was illegal in jamaica? I remember hearing also that over there, pleasuring a woman is about the grossest thing a guy can do.

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29 minutes ago, pollywood said:

I thought homosexuality was illegal in jamaica? I remember hearing also that over there, pleasuring a woman is about the grossest thing a guy can do.

Yes...basically illegal. Obviously this also causes problems for gay young men. I don't think the "nation" cares so much about gay/lesbian women or children. 

2 hours ago, Rdh1314 said:

I'm not racist against an entire nation. But I find the fact that it's common for very young boys over there to engage in sexual intercourse to be pretty horrible.  We have an opioid crisis in the United States which is may be even more horrible....I'm not being unkind or "racist" to state a fact about a country. Ignorance is bliss.

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On 10/24/2018 at 2:06 PM, Rdh1314 said:

No kidding.  And about 20 years ago we went to Jamaica for a vacation.   It's,  how shall I say, a "loose" society as far as sexual relations go.  The hotel manager was creepy and inappropriate. Every one was actually kind of creepy....I was much younger (and better looking at the time) and had black guy after black guy hitting on me.  I'm caucasian and was married, but the "men" there apparently didn't care that my husband was there.  Jamaica is not the United States. 

I've been to Jamaica 19 times, the most recent to bury my husband's ashes there because he really loved it there.    We had no children, and the men we would talk to found that tragic.  "Planting the seed" was a big deal at the time, and probably still.  I never had guys hitting on me because my husband was taller and bigger than most of the guys there (and he bought ganja from them), and many of those trips were before the movie "How Stella Got Her Groove Back" came out.  Ever since that movie, the perception is that all American women are looking for "the big bamboo."  And there is enough sex tourism that prostitutes and "rastatutes" are rampant now.  I still love the place, but I would never go there alone, because as a sixtysomething "fluffy" (Jamaican slang for "fat") widow, I am prime gigolo/hustler target and I just don't want to deal with the hassle.  All that said, I do know some American women who live there happily with their Jamaican significant others.

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11 hours ago, politichick said:

It is unkind, unfair and racist to generalize about an entire nation because of one unfortunate vacation 20 years ago and idiots being jackasses on reality TV. 

Well, if the stats show there is a 40% rate of teen/preteen pregnancy there, its gotta stand for something. 

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that article was an eye-opener. keep in mind the author is a native jamaican doctoral candidate and probably knows more than we do about the state of things.

I have little interest in the caribbean as a tourist.

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I always feel like the "friend" drama (as in the sneak peek) is so adolescent. If you have issues, you talk to your friend, you don't confront their fiancee.

It leaves the impression that the friend (in this case Natalie) wants to make themselves the center of attention, is jealous of losing their friend to a partner, and is being petty.

If you cheat on my friend and they tell me, I'm not gonna like you and I'm gonna think you're a piece of shit, but I'm not going to insert myself into your relationship and try to make you accountable to me. 

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@Honey Ashley states in episode 1 that she had had only ever dated white guys before. I see no evidence that she has a black fetish.

 

I think she met Jay and liked him- which I can see as a VACATION FLING. He seems very fun, and is cute (too skinny for my tastes but I see the appeal). If anything he’s probably NOT like the father(s) of her kids and that appeals to her. If what she said is true, that the wedding was paid for and very soon, and then she found out he cheated that’s brutal. 

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10 hours ago, pollywood said:

the producers needed a disapproving best friend angle for this season, so they went with that.

She is this season's D.U.F.F. (and I am saying this as a bigger gal myself) - last season it was Evelyn's friend who may have been crushing on Evelyn hard.  Someone should teach the poor girl how to dress.  I too am a visitor to Torrid at the Capital City Mall, but not everything they sell looks good on every body type.  Jeans with giant holes should really be accompanied by tights.....and her boobs don't deserve to be in jail.

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2 hours ago, Toaster Strudel said:

Jay just posted this about Natalie - I say it makes him look a lot worse than it makes her.

image.png.d61b947905ce22514fbe69ae8eca0be3.png

I completely disagree with you on Jay looking worse than Natalie. Selling her friend's story of being kidnapped and raped is unconscionable.  There is no limit to the trolling that she deserves. Good for him for sticking up for Ashley.

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