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Josiah and Lauren: He Has To Marry Somebody


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44 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I'd love to see what the Duggars served, especially considering the rehearsal dinner is traditionally hosted by the groom's family. Both Cathy Dillard and Guinn Seewald put out lovely spreads. The Duggars probably gave everyone an 1/8 of a hot dog and a spoonful of potato salad. 

Well they did say it was a casual "indoor cookout". Your menu is probably spot on.

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(edited)
2 minutes ago, amitville said:

What is a indoor cookout? 

I'm guessing hamburg, hot dogs, side salads, lemonade, etc. Only indoors.

Edited by GeeGolly
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Does anyone think the bridesmaid dresses look early 80's? They just remind me of something people would be wearing in an older church directory. They would have been much more stylish without the pleats on top, in my opinion. There are many ways they could have done that color and met their modesty standards that would have been more flattering!

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35 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

Does anyone think the bridesmaid dresses look early 80's? They just remind me of something people would be wearing in an older church directory. They would have been much more stylish without the pleats on top, in my opinion. There are many ways they could have done that color and met their modesty standards that would have been more flattering!

Ha! That's probably why I rather like them! I won't say that I cling to the 80's the way some people try to, but it was the decade which almost perfectly spanned my 20's, and I'm rather fond of most things that came out of it.

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On 7/2/2018 at 10:45 PM, Absolom said:

I didn't like the way hers fit either.  She's shown some very questionable judgment in dress and fit selection in the last couple of months as she tries to find her new style.  I did like her veil though.  

Bridesmaid:

image.png.1dcaaa957942f4b45a559f268321a24b.png

Searched the internet with my evening coffee. I even looked at patterns. This dress is the closest I could find. I think it is much prettier and more forgiving in the boob area than the bridesmaids' dresses. I'm wondering if they found an old second hand dress somewhere and tried to replicate it.

cap-sleeves-a-line-long-pleated-simple-c

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1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Searched the internet with my evening coffee. I even looked at patterns. This dress is the closest I could find. I think it is much prettier and more forgiving in the boob area than the bridesmaids' dresses. I'm wondering if they found an old second hand dress somewhere and tried to replicate it.

cap-sleeves-a-line-long-pleated-simple-c

Oof, the pink number looks like it turns everyone into "'countenance'-neck-BOOBSBOOBSBOOBS-waist." It makes the torso look like as much breast from top to bottom as side-to-side. Nobody needs one giant boob from clavicle to waistband. Yikes. 

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(edited)

I was thinking they probably used the pattern for a dress like this and it ended up looking strange on top because it was originally meant to be strapless.

Screenshot_20180705-172132.jpgScreenshot_20180705-173933.jpg.5e64277cd31ec8ced34c85c4646ec7ef.jpg

Edited by Lunera
Added picture
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I guess I'm in the minority, because I think the bridesmaids' dresses are pretty. I don't think Lauren should have had to select a dress that would be flattering on Joy -- who is schlubby on her best days and is currently nursing a newborn.

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I also like the bridesmaid's dresses. As someone who has had to deal with a Joy-sized chest since age 13, it's pretty hard to find something that looks good and I wouldn't expect the bride-to-be to have to consider my chest size along with everything else. 

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Most wedding parties have all shapes of women in them and I think most brides are mindful of that. A 'pretty dress' isn't pretty when it doesn't fit anyone correctly. Many brides choose a dress that has a couple of different styles that are similar or choose a dress that compliments most figures. With that said, it is hard to find a dress that really looks good on everyone. 

Looking back on my bridesmaids' dresses I cringe. They may have complimented a range of figures but they were butt ugly. Think of a cross between Princess Diana's wedding dress and a prom dress - in a shiny light turquoise (or sea-foam green?). Ugh!

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14 minutes ago, Quof said:

Does that dress have shoulder pads? Or are they wearing t-shirts underneath?

to me it looks like a little foam shoulder pad - the kind that some tops have that are removable.  the dress also might be straight up and down and fitted to each girl with the sash, which would make some of it easier.  All they would need is a bust measurement.  But then again I am not a seamstress!!

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These were my bridesmaid dresses (from J Crew) and I think they looked flattering on everyone.  I told my friends that I didn't care if they picked another dress as long as they were the same color.

I don't mind Lauren's bridesmaid dresses (are they short? - I couldn't tell by the pictures posted).  I think Kendra looks cute in hers.  I think no matter what dress Lauren chose it wasn't going to minimize Joy's chest.  I do like the longer version that xtwheeler posted but I think that would've been better on older girls.  Lauren is young and all her bridesmaids were teenagers.

 

Bridal party crop.jpg

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I like to see bridesmaids in the same color, but different style of their choosing.

On the other hand, Jin's bridesmaids were in different colors but the same style, and they were pretty.

Kendra looks cute in hers.  I can sympathize with Joy, being a D cup and short-waisted myself.  I was gigantic when I was nursing, and happy not to have been a bridesmaid then.

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5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Most wedding parties have all shapes of women in them and I think most brides are mindful of that. A 'pretty dress' isn't pretty when it doesn't fit anyone correctly. Many brides choose a dress that has a couple of different styles that are similar or choose a dress that compliments most figures. With that said, it is hard to find a dress that really looks good on everyone. 

Looking back on my bridesmaids' dresses I cringe. They may have complimented a range of figures but they were butt ugly. Think of a cross between Princess Diana's wedding dress and a prom dress - in a shiny light turquoise (or sea-foam green?). Ugh!

My sisters chose two really unfortunate dresses for their bridesmaids.  The colors were fine (one was teal and one was purple) for our coloring but the style was not great.  They lucked out with mine.  I had an evening wedding and my dresses were cocktail length, off the shoulder black velvet (1991).  They were super cute!  They were also able to be worn again unlike the ghastly things they chose.  But the teal dress was for 1984 and the purple was 1992.

What I think is a bit troublesome for these dresses is the gathering at the boobs plus what looks like a thick waistband adds weight on the gals that really isn't there.  It makes them look thicker.  The example dress above in mocha (?) has much lighter fabric so it doesn't add the bulk.  That said I do think they are way better than the other bridesmaids dresses (Jill, Jess, Jingle).  I LOATHED Jill's matron of honor dress with the doily's on the elbows.    

2 hours ago, DkNNy79 said:

These were my bridesmaid dresses (from J Crew) and I think they looked flattering on everyone.  I told my friends that I didn't care if they picked another dress as long as they were the same color.

I don't mind Lauren's bridesmaid dresses (are they short? - I couldn't tell by the pictures posted).  I think Kendra looks cute in hers.  I think no matter what dress Lauren chose it wasn't going to minimize Joy's chest.  I do like the longer version that xtwheeler posted but I think that would've been better on older girls.  Lauren is young and all her bridesmaids were teenagers.

 

Bridal party crop.jpg

Those are pretty!

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(edited)
5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Most wedding parties have all shapes of women in them and I think most brides are mindful of that. A 'pretty dress' isn't pretty when it doesn't fit anyone correctly. Many brides choose a dress that has a couple of different styles that are similar or choose a dress that compliments most figures. With that said, it is hard to find a dress that really looks good on everyone. 

Looking back on my bridesmaids' dresses I cringe. They may have complimented a range of figures but they were butt ugly. Think of a cross between Princess Diana's wedding dress and a prom dress - in a shiny light turquoise (or sea-foam green?). Ugh!

I agree that most brides are mindful, as I am a DD and have always gotten to wear reasonably flattering bridesmaids dresses. In Lauren's case, it looks like several of the bridesmaids were too busty for this to be a flattering style. She is eighteen, and probably just saw a dress she liked, and didn't think beyond that, but if I was her mother, I would have gently pointed that out to her. If the bridesmaids had all been shaped like her, they would have looked nice. I think when I get married (hopefully lol), I will go the same color, different style route. I really like that, because I want everyone to feel truly comfortable and confident, wearing a style they like. My sister was in a wedding where they did this, and I thought they all looked amazing!

 

IMG_0582.PNG

Edited by Christina87
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Great dresses!  I agree that same color different dress options are the way to go.  My maid of honor dresses on the more conservative side so I took that into consideration when picking out the dresses.  But like I mentioned above, I wouldn't have minded if my other friend (not my 12 year old niece) picked a different style dress that was a little more daring.

I also wanted a dress that my bridesmaids could potentially wear again.  Plus they were on sale (less than $100).

When I was maid of honor for my friend 10 years ago she picked this $200 champagne colored satin floor length ball gown with matching shawl that has never seen the light of day again.

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I did the same color, different dress motif when I got married in 2006. It was actually the same wine color as the dresses posted above. I had a matron of honor and two bridesmaids. My matron of honor was Indian and had just had a baby, so she wore a sari. One bridesmaid had a dress with straps and a matching shawl. My other bridesmaid had a V-necked sleeveless satiny dress. 

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4 minutes ago, madpsych78 said:

I did the same color, different dress motif when I got married in 2006. It was actually the same wine color as the dresses posted above. I had a matron of honor and two bridesmaids. My matron of honor was Indian and had just had a baby, so she wore a sari. One bridesmaid had a dress with straps and a matching shawl. My other bridesmaid had a V-necked sleeveless satiny dress. 

Saris are gorgeous!  I love all the colors in traditional Indian clothing.

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When my sister got married she took the wedding party dress shopping. She told us to look around to see what we liked. We gave a staff member the ugliest dress we could find while my sister was looking in a different area. The staff member gathered our sizes, and we told my sister we would be out with one of the options. 

The look on her face, and the way she asked, “All of you like this one?” , could  have earned her an award. She could have been the greatest actress.

We ended up in teal tea length dresses that looked decent on all of us.

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I wonder how much say Lauren got in the process. The courtships/wedding planning seems to be a focus of what TLC airs. Jana and Anna making the bridesmaid dresses seems to be a storyline for tv. They (Jana and Anna) probably had more say than Lauren in what the dresses would look like. If someone were making bridesmaid dresses for my wedding, I would be careful about being critical, pushy, etc. considering it's a lot of work done for my benefit. 

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1 hour ago, rue721 said:

I find the Duggar-Swanson wedding pictures genuinely disturbing. Josiah looks devastated. I know people are joking about him crying himself to sleep on his wedding night, but the look on his face makes me think that's not a joke. Honestly, seeing this breaks my heart. Joy's wedding was a gussied up prison intake, too, but at least the look on her face was never, and still isn't, so utterly without hope.

At first, when the courtship was announced, I thought that Josiah was trying to get out from under JB's thumb by getting married and moving out. But seeing these pictures, I think that some other posters were right and he was ordered to be married and given a deadline to do so. I have no idea what his parents could be holding over his head given that he's a grown man and can legally make his own way, but something is horribly wrong here.

I think Lauren is meant to be Josiah's gaoler and he knows it. She probably knows it, too, and maybe that's part of why she's clutching at him and breathless -- she's eager to show what a good job she's already doing "saving" him and earning her own brownie points in heaven. In the "congratulations" video, neither of his parents say one loving thing about him, or in fact anything about him individually at all, but Michelle makes a big point to say how godly Lauren is and how lucky they are to have her.

Josiah saying that he decided years ago to "slow down" for his first year of marriage might be his way of expressing how out of control and maybe even frightening the whirlwind of marriage pressure and courtship has been. I think he's just trying to reassure himself in the midst of all this chaos, that he'll have the chance to get his feet back under him once he's "safely" married. Regardless of his sexuality, this is a brittle 21-year-old who probably feels like he's under immense pressure to "prove himself" as man. His wedding seems to be a crucible and I think he's just willing himself through it.

Honestly, I suspect that Josiah has something in his past that his parents/cult consider horribly shameful and the reason that things ended with Marjorie is that he confessed his own "shame" to her when Josh's scandal broke. Lauren apparently was willing to go ahead with the marriage anyway, probably, like I said, thinking that she would earn SO MANY brownie points by "saving" this sinner -- something that girls have deluded themselves into believing since time immortal. She seems like any vapid teenage girl and I'm not condemning her. But I think that she's going into this marriage with her eyes on the prize of becoming a paragon of sacrificial, domestic womanhood for her cult, and as long as she doesn't lose her religion, she might genuinely feel fulfilled with that. I don't think this is a forced marriage for her, like I think it is for Josiah, I think she's just making a really unwise choice.

I feel bad for her in that I think she is limiting her own potential and condemning herself to an unhappy home life in this marriage. But I also don't feel bad for her in the sense that I think she's a willing participant in this cult and even in what others would see as a "sham" marriage and is actively doing her damnedest to strengthen the cult (and its hold on others).

Your description of Lauren sounds a lot like Anna.  One thing to keep in mind though, Lauren's world-view is a lot ore narrower than most of ours.  She won't know that her marriage is a sham (if the rumors about Josiah) are true.  She firmly believes that being gay is a choice and she must do everything in her power to save Josiah from the fires of hell. 

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1 hour ago, rue721 said:

I find the Duggar-Swanson wedding pictures genuinely disturbing. Josiah looks devastated. I know people are joking about him crying himself to sleep on his wedding night, but the look on his face makes me think that's not a joke. Honestly, seeing this breaks my heart. Joy's wedding was a gussied up prison intake, too, but at least the look on her face was never, and still isn't, so utterly without hope.

At first, when the courtship was announced, I thought that Josiah was trying to get out from under JB's thumb by getting married and moving out. But seeing these pictures, I think that some other posters were right and he was ordered to be married and given a deadline to do so. I have no idea what his parents could be holding over his head given that he's a grown man and can legally make his own way, but something is horribly wrong here.

I think Lauren is meant to be Josiah's gaoler and he knows it. She probably knows it, too, and maybe that's part of why she's clutching at him and breathless -- she's eager to show what a good job she's already doing "saving" him and earning her own brownie points in heaven. In the "congratulations" video, neither of his parents say one loving thing about him, or in fact anything about him individually at all, but Michelle makes a big point to say how godly Lauren is and how lucky they are to have her.

Josiah saying that he decided years ago to "slow down" for his first year of marriage might be his way of expressing how out of control and maybe even frightening the whirlwind of marriage pressure and courtship has been. I think he's just trying to reassure himself in the midst of all this chaos, that he'll have the chance to get his feet back under him once he's "safely" married. Regardless of his sexuality, this is a brittle 21-year-old who probably feels like he's under immense pressure to "prove himself" as man. His wedding seems to be a crucible and I think he's just willing himself through it.

Honestly, I suspect that Josiah has something in his past that his parents/cult consider horribly shameful and the reason that things ended with Marjorie is that he confessed his own "shame" to her when Josh's scandal broke. Lauren apparently was willing to go ahead with the marriage anyway, probably, like I said, thinking that she would earn SO MANY brownie points by "saving" this sinner -- something that girls have deluded themselves into believing since time immortal. She seems like any vapid teenage girl and I'm not condemning her. But I think that she's going into this marriage with her eyes on the prize of becoming a paragon of sacrificial, domestic womanhood for her cult, and as long as she doesn't lose her religion, she might genuinely feel fulfilled with that. I don't think this is a forced marriage for her, like I think it is for Josiah, I think she's just making a really unwise choice.

I feel bad for her in that I think she is limiting her own potential and condemning herself to an unhappy home life in this marriage. But I also don't feel bad for her in the sense that I think she's a willing participant in this cult and even in what others would see as a "sham" marriage and is actively doing her damnedest to strengthen the cult (and its hold on others).

I agree with this so much! Joy's wedding was a total joke, but she and Austin did seem to have some kind of spark (which has totally gone away) when they were flipping houses prior to the wedding, and joy kept making constant, CONSTANT remarks about how they'd have to leave the reception early. There seemed to be some element of "this is as good as it's going to get for me, so I might as well focus on the positive and enjoy the things I can." I don't even see that in Josiah's wedding. Like you said, I see a deadline for him and brownie points for lauren. I really hope she is not horribly disappointed later in life, like when her younger sisters marry someone they are Jinger/Jeremy level hot for and she knows they are having great and frequent sex!

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1 hour ago, rue721 said:

 

I think Lauren is meant to be Josiah's gaoler and he knows it. She probably knows it, too, and maybe that's part of why she's clutching at him and breathless -- she's eager to show what a good job she's already doing "saving" him and earning her own brownie points in heaven. In the "congratulations" video, neither of his parents say one loving thing about him, or in fact anything about him individually at all, but Michelle makes a big point to say how godly Lauren is and how lucky they are to have her.

Coming out of lurking to say I'm hungry for brownies now....

I had an Irish wedding (Mr. Booey is Irish), and all the groomsmen plus Mr. Booey wore kilts in their own clan/county tartans. So since we already had all those colors going on, I told my bridesmaids to just wear a black dress of their choosing. Only restriction was knee-length or longer, and no boobs hanging out. Then I got them all sashes to wear in the tartan that I had as an accent on my wedding dress, to tie it all together. I figured that was easiest since black dresses are pretty universal and can always be worn again, and some might have even already had one. Plus I had my own dress to worry about. I had a very specific vision- think, Maid Marian in the wedding scene at the end of Robin Hood Prince of Thieves- and a friend (NOT Jana!) was sewing it for me. We went to Jo Ann Fabrics, picked out the pattern and materials, and spent maybe $100 total (we had some killer coupons). The dress came out beautiful, and the whole wedding party all together made for some wonderful photos.

So I won't entirely knock the Duggars for going the homemade dress route, I am all for that option and am so happy that's what I did for my wedding dress. You can get exactly what you want that way, and most times spend a lot less. However, I had a long engagement and my friend had almost a year and a half to make just one dress, versus CinderJana&Anna churning out a dozen or however many in a few months....

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On 7/3/2018 at 11:25 PM, Jeeves said:

This wasn't a dress-up occasion - apparently it was the wedding rehearsal. I think their shoes are just fine, and not at all hideous. A couple of them are wearing Birkies, like millions of men and women do. I thought Lauren's sandals were a nice style.

And I think "Birkies" are hideous.  

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4 hours ago, rue721 said:

I find the Duggar-Swanson wedding pictures genuinely disturbing. Josiah looks devastated. I know people are joking about him crying himself to sleep on his wedding night, but the look on his face makes me think that's not a joke. Honestly, seeing this breaks my heart. Joy's wedding was a gussied up prison intake, too, but at least the look on her face was never, and still isn't, so utterly without hope.

At first, when the courtship was announced, I thought that Josiah was trying to get out from under JB's thumb by getting married and moving out. But seeing these pictures, I think that some other posters were right and he was ordered to be married and given a deadline to do so. I have no idea what his parents could be holding over his head given that he's a grown man and can legally make his own way, but something is horribly wrong here.

I think Lauren is meant to be Josiah's gaoler and he knows it. She probably knows it, too, and maybe that's part of why she's clutching at him and breathless -- she's eager to show what a good job she's already doing "saving" him and earning her own brownie points in heaven. In the "congratulations" video, neither of his parents say one loving thing about him, or in fact anything about him individually at all, but Michelle makes a big point to say how godly Lauren is and how lucky they are to have her.

Josiah saying that he decided years ago to "slow down" for his first year of marriage might be his way of expressing how out of control and maybe even frightening the whirlwind of marriage pressure and courtship has been. I think he's just trying to reassure himself in the midst of all this chaos, that he'll have the chance to get his feet back under him once he's "safely" married. Regardless of his sexuality, this is a brittle 21-year-old who probably feels like he's under immense pressure to "prove himself" as man. His wedding seems to be a crucible and I think he's just willing himself through it.

Honestly, I suspect that Josiah has something in his past that his parents/cult consider horribly shameful and the reason that things ended with Marjorie is that he confessed his own "shame" to her when Josh's scandal broke. Lauren apparently was willing to go ahead with the marriage anyway, probably, like I said, thinking that she would earn SO MANY brownie points by "saving" this sinner -- something that girls have deluded themselves into believing since time immortal. She seems like any vapid teenage girl and I'm not condemning her. But I think that she's going into this marriage with her eyes on the prize of becoming a paragon of sacrificial, domestic womanhood for her cult, and as long as she doesn't lose her religion, she might genuinely feel fulfilled with that. I don't think this is a forced marriage for her, like I think it is for Josiah, I think she's just making a really unwise choice.

I feel bad for her in that I think she is limiting her own potential and condemning herself to an unhappy home life in this marriage. But I also don't feel bad for her in the sense that I think she's a willing participant in this cult and even in what others would see as a "sham" marriage and is actively doing her damnedest to strengthen the cult (and its hold on others).

Well said. I'm sure like I said before Josiah will be spending a lot of time in the bathroom crying over what his life has become. He had so much spunk. Now he seems to be reading from a bad movie script because he was told that this is the way life was going to be. So, so sad. 

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(edited)

Josiah is now the headship. He can do what he wants, when he wants and just because he wants.  I don't see him so much as having a jailer as having a beard.  And I don't mean the facial hair type!  So he may not actually be as sad as he appears. 

Sure, he'll have to do his husbandly duty a few times, imagining Zac Efron or Liam Hemsworth in place of Lauren.  But that's a small price to actually pay to be away from his real jailers, the ones that gave birth to him and raised him.  He can go out and find his own "happy place", leaving the wife at home and the accountability and the chaperones in his rear view.  He technically won't have to account to anybody.  

Edited by leighdear
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"He has to marry somebody" --- does he really?   And does she, for that matter?   What I don't understand is why such quick courtships?  Why not have long engagements?   IF they're going to be married, let them know each other.  I know it's too late now but maybe with the next victim, er child, there can be at least non-chaperoned phone calls and texts.

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On 7/5/2018 at 8:24 AM, BitterApple said:

Is this Ryan lady angling to become the next Christian reality star or something? Because I checked out her Instagram and she does not seem like the type of person to be hanging out with the low-brow Duggars. There's got to be some reason she's kissing Michelle's ass.

She wrote "a women" twice. Definitely low-brow enough for MEchelle,

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1 hour ago, leighdear said:

He technically won't have to account to anybody.  

He has no job (or skills) outside of working for JB.  Until he cuts that cord, he'll have to toe the line.

39 minutes ago, EAG46 said:

"He has to marry somebody" --- does he really?   And does she, for that matter?   What I don't understand is why such quick courtships?  Why not have long engagements?   IF they're going to be married, let them know each other.  I know it's too late now but maybe with the next victim, er child, there can be at least non-chaperoned phone calls and texts.

That's not the Duggar way.

 

I thought Lauren's dress was nice but by God I wish she had washed her hair.  It looks dreadfully dirty, especially in the close-up pictures.

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(edited)

Supposedly Si works in Duggar real estate, but I don't think we know how accurate that is.  Whatever his "job" is, I imagine it will leave him plenty of time to get to know Lauren.   Do we know what Joseph does for a living?

Honestly, I don't care if Si is into girls, into guys or into toasters.  I'm just curious how his fairly adventurous nature is going to adapt to being "in charge" of a relationship and settling down, since he's now one of the grownups.    

Edited by leighdear
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12 hours ago, EAG46 said:

I know it's too late now but maybe with the next victim, er child, there can be at least non-chaperoned phone calls and texts.

There already have been.  Jessa and Ben talked on the phone without anyone chaperoning and so did Jinger and Jeremy.  Joy Anna and Austin were very loosely chaperoned by his father and could easily have had private conversations in another room.  They more than likely had private phone conversations, but I can't swear they put it on the show.  Too many couples now for me to remember.

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3 hours ago, leighdear said:

Supposedly Si works in Duggar real estate, but I don't think we know how accurate that is.  Whatever his "job" is, I imagine it will leave him plenty of time to get to know Lauren.   Do we know what Joseph does for a living?

Josiah Duggar has not passed his test to become a licensed real estate agent in Arkansas.  There are required courses to take before someone can sign up to take the test, but the whole process is really easy for someone with half a brain.  His grandmother Mary is a licensed broker and owns Good Neighbor Realty.  His father Jim Bob is a licensed salesman under Mary's broker's license.  If Josiah is doing anything for the family real estate business, he is working in maintenance of rentals and in rehabbing houses. 

Joseph runs the used car lot with Josh.

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It’s probably JB.  You have to be 18 to obtain a real estate license. And go through the training. I did it many years ago when I was out of college.  I remember it being pretty intensive. Lots of math. Which makes me wonder how the SOTDRT prepped anyone for the exam.  I had a college education and had to retake the math portion because I didn’t pass it the first time. Not a math whiz lol! 

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