S06.E10: Communication

[Drogo]

With less than a month to go, the couples focus on how they can improve communication with their spouses; the couples' trust and honesty are tested when they are asked to trade cell phones for an hour without warning.

[Primetimer]

Does Jephte refuse to let Shawniece look at his phone because he has something to hide, or because producers told him to? We try to figure it out on the latest Bride & Doom podcast!

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[Gem 10]

Where's Molly on "Unfiltered"?  And, why is Jamie talking so fast?

The phone exchange segment was stupid.  I don't blame Jep for refusing to give up his phone.  Producers are grasping at straws.  

Molly & Jon just waiting it out to collect the money.  Molly and those nails.  What do they have to do with anything?   Husband asked me why Jon was following Molly around like a little puppy.  Said "He should man up."

i can't wait to see what other nonsense will happen in the next three weeks.  It seems like they have exhausted every angle.  What B.S.

Edited March 14, 2018 by Gem 10

[Starlight925]

15 minutes ago, Gem 10 said:

Where's Molly on "Unfiltered"?  And, why is Jamie talking so fast?

I can't watch "Unfiltered" because I find Jamie so annoying.  She looks so different from when she first met Doug.  She has the most awful voice, and she talks over everyone.  Fame whore much?

[Empress1]

Jon is so mad he's not getting laid.

Re: self-care, I work out 5-6 days a week and I absolutely would not give that up for two months unless I was injured. Dude could come with me but I wouldn't just stop going. (Actually, if this was filmed last summer, dude would be a cycling widow as I spend a lot of time training for a charity ride that I do every year, and I REALLY wouldn't give that up.)

I wouldn't give up my phone and I wouldn't feel compelled to look through dude's.

[JocelynCavanaugh]

Jon is such a raging prick. He actually scares me. Total conjecture here but I could see him being a date rapist, he's so mean and entitled. I'm glad Molly isn't giving in to his pressure to do something she doesn't want to do and doesn't owe him; I just hope he doesn't get violent with her.

"I mean, that's fair. Who wants to be talked over?" Jamie says. Over Jaclyn, who was still trying to finish a sentence.

Edited March 14, 2018 by JocelynCavanaugh

[Yeah No]

First Jon says he's just going to wait for Molly to come around and in the very next scene he's arguing with her yet again over not having sex yet.  Dude, suck it up and act like a man, not a spoiled brat whose mommy is denying him the bottle!  I'm not sold on Molly either but I totally understand her feeling too pressured by him.  It started out too subtle to see but now it's getting more obvious.  Then again, she has not adequately communicated to him that she's just taking her time to be really sure, not rejecting him outright either.

I didn't love the phone swap either and don't blame Jon and Molly for agreeing not to do it.  I'm married a long time and I've never seen my husband's phone nor do I want to and vice versa.  Real trust is NOT looking at the phone so why is the show making them do it?  Oh yeah, right, desperation, thanks, @Gem 10.

I don't really believe Jephte has that much to hide.  He probably just didn't want Shawniece to see texts he made on dating sites right before he got married, and I don't blame him.  I seriously doubt he's got anyone on the hook on the side since getting married.   I thought Shawniece handled this very well.  She is continually impressing me with her maturity.

Jaclyn and Ryan - I don't like these two together.  I really don't see them as that much of a match and he tends to come off as an entitled douche.  I said in previous weeks that I think Ryan is Jaclyn's rebound relationship and I still believe that.  Considering the short amount of time they have to get to know each other before decision day, his being absent so much is just irresponsible.  I'd say it's no wonder he hasn't been in a relationship for 9 years.  I think for a guy that young that's a kind of a red flag.  What has he been doing all that time?  Meeting up with his douche bros for late night drinks and hooking up with one night stands?  I know that Jephte hasn't had a relationship in 7 years.  How old his he, 26?  He's probably very inexperienced.  For a guy that went into teaching he certainly lacks interpersonal skills and I think that has a lot to do with his lack of relationship experience.

Where is Molly on "Unfiltered"?  Good question, I've been asking that myself for weeks now. 

[JocelynCavanaugh]

7 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

First Jon says he's just going to wait for Molly to come around and in the very next scene he's arguing with her yet again over not having sex yet.  Dude, suck it up and act like a man, not a spoiled brat whose mommy is denying him the bottle!  I'm not sold on Molly either but I totally understand her feeling too pressured by him.  It started out too subtle to see but now it's getting more obvious.  Then again, she has not adequately communicated to him that she's just taking her time to be really sure, not rejecting him outright either... 

Jaclyn and Ryan - I don't like these two together.  I really don't see them as that much of a match and he tends to come off as an entitled douche.  I said in previous weeks that I think Ryan is Jaclyn's rebound relationship and I still believe that.  Considering the short amount of time they have to get to know each other before decision day, his being absent so much is just irresponsible...

Where is Molly on "Unfiltered"?  Good question, I've been asking that myself for weeks now. 

Good point about Molly. Unless she's said it off-camera, she should probably explain, although by this point I think Jon is too blinded by entitled rage to see her side.

What's strange is that while I think you're right about Jaclyn, she still appears to be the one trying to make this marriage work. Ryan's not coming off 18 months of grief, so what's his excuse?

It's not a great sign when the most likable guy on the show is Jephte! He's usually a jerk to Shawniece but he seems kinda fun with other people.

[SnarkKitty]

Son (who lives in Boston): "Hey, do you watch that Married at First Sight" show?
Me:  "Yeah, why?"
Son:  "Oh, I know someone on this season. My co-worker came back married, and told us she was doing the show."
Me:  "Yeah! The real inside scoop!"

The co-worker? Jacklyn.

Finally after years (decades, TBH) I finally know someone (sort of.)

[qtpye]

7 hours ago, SnarkKitty said:

Son (who lives in Boston): "Hey, do you watch that Married at First Sight" show?
Me:  "Yeah, why?"
Son:  "Oh, I know someone on this season. My co-worker came back married, and told us she was doing the show."
Me:  "Yeah! The real inside scoop!"

The co-worker? Jacklyn.

Finally after years (decades, TBH) I finally know someone (sort of.)

SnarkKitty, that is awesome!!! Any tidbits you could bring on this board would be much appreciated.

Edited March 14, 2018 by qtpye

[Racj82]

I honestly  don' even know what the big deal is with the cell phones.  Like is it even awesome that people didn' do it? I don't give a damn if someone I'm with sees my phone. Nothing to hide. She would have been bored in five minutes. There would have been no resistance with me because I don't care.

With Jon and  Molly, there is nothing else even there to latch onto so having sex is never going to exit his mind. They are boring together. And this relationship has hit the point where there is nowhere else to progress but physically. Molly shouldn't do anything she shouldn't want to do. But, it doesn't seem like she ever will so they will just be in a dry marriage for weeks. Fun! Maybe Jon needs a little Ryan gusto. Get a job or get active in something.  Not to over share but I haven't had sex in a long time. Or dated really and I don't care. I'm too busy doing other things to care. If I spent a lot of ti.e thinking about it, I would be agitated too.

[walnutqueen]

7 hours ago, SnarkKitty said:

Son (who lives in Boston): "Hey, do you watch that Married at First Sight" show?
Me:  "Yeah, why?"
Son:  "Oh, I know someone on this season. My co-worker came back married, and told us she was doing the show."
Me:  "Yeah! The real inside scoop!"

The co-worker? Jacklyn.

Finally after years (decades, TBH) I finally know someone (sort of.)

So, what's the inside scoop?

I'm expecting you to guilt trip your son into sleuthing for all of us.  ;-)

[kira28]

I've dated a Ryan. Run jackie run!! He's such an asshole. They had a movie night planned and instead he hangs out with friends  and expects her to be OK with that. Omg  I went thru that soo many nights. And  I guarantee Ryan will never change and he will never appreciate Jackie til she leaves and never looks back.  

Jon is way too hung up on sex. Molly's not going to give it up. The more she's around Jon the less attractive he becomes. 

I can't believe they picked these men who haven't been in relationships for 7 years or more!!! How is someone like thst ready for marriage?  

[becauseIsaidso]

IMO, Jepthe is clearly just playing the dating game...and he seems to be very much the 'my way or the highway' type. He took the phone assignment as a personal attack instead of a couple's assignment. If he had simply said he had nothing to hide, but he felt that they both deserved privacy in some things, it wouldn't have escalated and ended with him throwing a tantrum and running away from having an adult conversation. He has NO concept of give and take or compromise. Shawniece appears to have come into this with the same mindset as a woman who went thru the conventional route of date, engage, marry and make a life together, so I can see why she keeps saying 'we're married' and why she cries so much.

Ryan is nothing but a 20-something child who will pout and talk over anyone until he gets his way. There seemed to be more than one story as to why he was out so late - was it just some time with the guys or was it some (I think I heard him say) retirement party?. And, who the heck plans a night out on the same night they are going to be free of the cameras - something wrong with that pic as in Ryan does NOT want to have truly private time with Jacklyn. I agree with Jacklyn being on the rebound - I think she was ready to marry the guy who died and saw MAFS as a way to just pick up where she left off. I don't even remember what they did with the phone thing.

I totally understand Molly's reasons to be slow at advancing the physical side, but I don't think she was very clear with Jon or took enough time discussing the slower pace she wanted. I think Jon's just so full of himself, he can't possibly understand why Molly doesn't want to boink him every second they're together. I have a sense that she also holds back because he's been so aggressive she fears if she gives and inch, he'll take everything. He needs to get his mind out of his pants. I missed a couple of episodes and try to catch up, but I don't recall if Jon's gotten a job yet - that's an additional blow to the ego - and perhaps he's just biding his time until the end and he has whatever money he gets from the show. All things considered, I do think they handled the phone thing correctly.

[ShaNaeNae]

8 hours ago, SnarkKitty said:

Son (who lives in Boston): "Hey, do you watch that Married at First Sight" show?
Me:  "Yeah, why?"
Son:  "Oh, I know someone on this season. My co-worker came back married, and told us she was doing the show."
Me:  "Yeah! The real inside scoop!"

The co-worker? Jacklyn.

Finally after years (decades, TBH) I finally know someone (sort of.)

Ah cool!  Like you, I've watched Reality TV for YEARS and was shocked that I've never seen even an acquaintance on any show.  

Then came one day in early 2016 when I put 2 & 2 together and realized Neil Bowlus from S3 was a coworker.  He is just as awesome in person.  You'll have to get the scoop on Jacklyn from your son!

[Booger666]

4 minutes ago, becauseIsaidso said:

Ryan is nothing but a 20-something child who will pout and talk over anyone until he gets his way. There seemed to be more than one story as to why he was out so late - was it just some time with the guys or was it some (I think I heard him say) retirement party?. And, who the heck plans a night out on the same night they are going to be free of the cameras - something wrong with that pic as in Ryan does NOT want to have truly private time with Jacklyn. I agree with Jacklyn being on the rebound - I think she was ready to marry the guy who died and saw MAFS as a way to just pick up where she left off. I don't even remember what they did with the phone thing.

It was weird how Ryan kept throwing out a bunch of BS excuses.  It’s like he knows he is wrong but sure as hell isn’t going to admit it so he talks fast and says it differently each time waiting for something to stick.  My fav was “it was a work thing that came up last minute”.  He tries to make it sound like he got assigned to work late at the very last minute.  What BS as it was a planned retirement party.  It sounded like that even though it was date night she agreed he could go until 8:30 and then around 8:30, which is when he would already be late getting home, he calls and wants to stay out even later.  It’s all about what Ryan wants to do all the time.  Ryan is annoying AF and needs to grow up.

[kira28]

The phone thing bothered me. Im sure it was set up for drama. It's incredibly invasive. I once had a boyfriend who constantly went thru my phone.  I felt like since I had nothing to hide that I should let him otherwise I looked guilty. However  I declined to go thru his phone because I trusted him. Well if I had gone thru it I would have seen the dozens of flirty texts between him and the ex girlfriend he swore he wanted nothing to do with it. I've had male coworkers who have a totally secret life cheating on their wives because the wife trusts them and  doesn't go thru their phone. I've always felt you should respect someones privacy and don't feel a need to dig thru someone's phone. On the flip side my respect for privacy and trusting has led to being cheated on and not having a clue. If I'd goen thru my ex husband's phone I would have never had two children with him because I'd have known he was having an affair. There were literally no signs. But had I'd gone thru his phone id see the texts sent the constant call from work. So you are damned if you do and damned if you don't. I liked Jon and Molly's maturity regarding the issue. Jephte is so immature!! He's like a, petulant teenager who gets mad when his mom tells him to clean his room. 

Edited March 14, 2018 by kira28

[Empress1]

29 minutes ago, kira28 said:

I've dated a Ryan. Run jackie run!! He's such an asshole. They had a movie night planned and instead he hangs out with friends  and expects her to be OK with that. Omg  I went thru that soo many nights. And  I guarantee Ryan will never change and he will never appreciate Jackie til she leaves and never looks back.  

Jon is way too hung up on sex. Molly's not going to give it up. The more she's around Jon the less attractive he becomes. 

I can't believe they picked these men who haven't been in relationships for 7 years or more!!! How is someone like thst ready for marriage?  

I agree with @Racj82 that Jon is focused on sex because there's nothing else going on in his relationship. Molly is boring. They are boring together. (I also agree with the podcast that Molly didn't want to go through Jon's phone because she doesn't care what's in it.) He's probably talked out.

[Racj82]

26 minutes ago, kira28 said:

I've dated a Ryan. Run jackie run!! He's such an asshole. They had a movie night planned and instead he hangs out with friends  and expects her to be OK with that. Omg  I went thru that soo many nights. And  I guarantee Ryan will never change and he will never appreciate Jackie til she leaves and never looks back.  

Jon is way too hung up on sex. Molly's not going to give it up. The more she's around Jon the less attractive he becomes. 

I can't believe they picked these men who haven't been in relationships for 7 years or more!!! How is someone like thst ready for marriage?  

Regarding the last part, not having dated for a long time long term has nothing to do with being ready for marriage. There are lots of reasons why people do that. Many having nothing to do with being to immature or ready to date. The only main thing these people need is to be open to the concept and mature enough to grow with it. Their age or how much they date doesn' mean anything in a bubble since everyone is different.  The problem is that these so called experts don't ask the right questions. Like is the reason they are single is because they don't want to change their lifestyle like Ryan, my way or the highway like Jephte or i need instant attraction like Molly (even though that may be a little unfair to her) then you don't need to be on this show. That's the stuff that should matter. The why's basically. Not just the situation itself.

I haven't had a long term relationship my while life. I'm 35 years old. It' not because I don't want to be married or I'm not ready for it. Or even for a relationship.  I've had a string of rejections or possible connections that never pan out. It would just lead me to years of not trying. Now, I just stay concentrated on work. It's not like women will be approaching me left and right for dates so it's easy for me to be single. But, I've took the time to learn as I go, learn through the mistakes others have made and continue to grow on my own. Maybe I will be able to fully put myself back out there soon but it's not because I can't handle a relatioship. I would never do this show because I think its dumb in general though. 

[bichonblitz]

12 minutes ago, Empress1 said:

I agree with @Racj82 that Jon is focused on sex because there's nothing else going on in his relationship. Molly is boring. They are boring together. (I also agree with the podcast that Molly didn't want to go through Jon's phone because she doesn't care what's in it.) He's probably talked out.

I think he's pissed and hurt because she tells him the reason there is no sex is because she's not attracted to him. That's a low blow. She could have said she's not ready yet, she wants to take it slow, blah, blah, blah. But no, she has to go straight for the ego. I can't stand her! 

Oh, on the shallow side, HD is not Molly's friend. She has bad acne under all that heavy foundation she wears. It was really showing through last night. If I were Jon, I would be turned off to that! 

[Empress1]

4 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

I think he's pissed and hurt because she tells him the reason there is no sex is because she's not attracted to him. That's a low blow. She could have said she's not ready yet, she wants to take it slow, blah, blah, blah. But no, she has to go straight for the ego. I can't stand her! 

Oh, on the shallow side, HD is not Molly's friend. She has bad acne under all that heavy foundation she wears. It was really showing through last night. If I were Jon, I would be turned off to that! 

Molly does have bad skin. Jackie's isn't great either. Shawniece has clear skin.

This is true re: Jon. And really, there's nothing he can or should try to do about it - he looks how he looks (and she does appear to like his looks), he acts how he acts (and he HAS tried to modify his joking and teasing because she said she doesn't like it, and it doesn't appear to have helped). Hurt and bored are not the makings of a good relationship. They do seem to have fun together so maybe they'll end up friends when this is over, but this isn't a romantic relationship.

[Yeah No]

7 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

I think he's pissed and hurt because she tells him the reason there is no sex is because she's not attracted to him. That's a low blow. She could have said she's not ready yet, she wants to take it slow, blah, blah, blah. But no, she has to go straight for the ego. I can't stand her! 

I totally agree on this.  Molly goes straight for the jugular with everything at any perceived slight (and I think most of them are perceived at this point and not real), like Jon's desire to be with her is some kind of affront or something.  I know I said I understood her reaction to the pressure he puts on her, but it's no wonder he's feeling so rejected and acting the way he is.  Plus it has to be hard to sleep next to someone you want to be close with that rejects you this way day in and day out, especially if you just MARRIED them.  After a while I can understand his behavior.   I agree that she's boring.  I don't find him boring at all, although together they are boring.

[Gem 10]

59 minutes ago, becauseIsaidso said:

IMO, Jepthe is clearly just playing the dating game...and he seems to be very much the 'my way or the highway' type. He took the phone assignment as a personal attack instead of a couple's assignment. If he had simply said he had nothing to hide, but he felt that they both deserved privacy in some things, it wouldn't have escalated and ended with him throwing a tantrum and running away from having an adult conversation. He has NO concept of give and take or compromise. Shawniece appears to have come into this with the same mindset as a woman who went thru the conventional route of date, engage, marry and make a life together, so I can see why she keeps saying 'we're married' and why she cries so much.

Ryan is nothing but a 20-something child who will pout and talk over anyone until he gets his way. There seemed to be more than one story as to why he was out so late - was it just some time with the guys or was it some (I think I heard him say) retirement party?. And, who the heck plans a night out on the same night they are going to be free of the cameras - something wrong with that pic as in Ryan does NOT want to have truly private time with Jacklyn. I agree with Jacklyn being on the rebound - I think she was ready to marry the guy who died and saw MAFS as a way to just pick up where she left off. I don't even remember what they did with the phone thing.

I totally understand Molly's reasons to be slow at advancing the physical side, but I don't think she was very clear with Jon or took enough time discussing the slower pace she wanted. I think Jon's just so full of himself, he can't possibly understand why Molly doesn't want to boink him every second they're together. I have a sense that she also holds back because he's been so aggressive she fears if she gives and inch, he'll take everything. He needs to get his mind out of his pants. I missed a couple of episodes and try to catch up, but I don't recall if Jon's gotten a job yet - that's an additional blow to the ego - and perhaps he's just biding his time until the end and he has whatever money he gets from the show. All things considered, I do think they handled the phone thing correctly.

I think Molly has been done wth Jon from maybe day 2.  Something happened to turn her off completely.  She's just biding her time and going through the motions as per contract and the money.  I really think he knows it and is just going through the motions also.  That's just my opinion tho.

[psychoticstate]

Oh, this show.

I agree that Molly should not be doing anything she doesn't want to and yes, while the couples are married, they have only known each other a month.  Clearly it's not like dating because they live together and see each other every day but being married (at first sight) should not equate immediately having sex.  That said, I think Jon is upset and discouraged because he knows Molly does not find him physically attractive.  She's said as much in her THs.  It would be incredibly discouraging to think that your spouse didn't find you physically attractive.  That may be unsurmountable to deal with.  So yeah, it is the sex and it's not the sex for Jon IMO, if that makes sense.  I also didn't feel that he was being nasty about her getting her nails done although he may have seen it as a way to avoid being with him.  I'm surprised his lack of employment hasn't come up as a bigger issue and I'm also surprised we haven't seen anything about him looking for another job.  If he's home all day, other than going to the gym, OF COURSE he would want Molly to come home right after work and spend time with him.  He's been by himself all day.  Again, the lack of work should be a larger issue.

Also, was surprised during Dr. Jessica's meeting with all three that Molly's lack of intimacy with Jon was not brought up.

I kind of understand where Jephte is coming from with regard to the phone.  There should be trust between the couples but this is just forcing a confrontation. Maybe he doesn't want Shawniece to know he's texting his mom and asking for marital advice. Maybe he doesn't want her to know he watches kitten videos during the day. Maybe he doesn't want her to know the dating sites he was on before marrying.  Who knows?   That said, at this point, I think Shawniece and Jephte have the best chance of succeeding out of the three.

Ryan and Jackie - - IMO, Ryan's work schedule conflict is completely the fault of the "experts."  They should be asking every participant about their work schedule and ask what is acceptable and what is a deal breaker in a partner.  Ryan is a worker and it sounds like he has been for his entire adult life. Jaclyn wants someone who is going to be home every night.  Sounds like a deal breaker to me. I can't fault Ryan or Jackie for that.  However, Ryan can be a complete dick.  Can he not tell his friends "look, guys, I'll have to see you all in 3 or 4 weeks. Until decision day, I've got to spend time with my wife, get to know her and make the right decision at the end."  Or why not invite Jackie to join him for a little while with his friends and then he and Jackie go home for movie night?  It's not difficult.  If I were Jackie, I'd be very concerned about this and thinking that Ryan isn't putting forth the work necessary and can't even commit to a date night.

[Gem 10]

41 minutes ago, Yeah No said:

I totally agree on this.  Molly goes straight for the jugular with everything at any perceived slight (and I think most of them are perceived at this point and not real), like Jon's desire to be with her is some kind of affront or something.  I know I said I understood her reaction to the pressure he puts on her, but it's no wonder he's feeling so rejected and acting the way he is.  Plus it has to be hard to sleep next to someone you want to be close with that rejects you this way day in and day out, especially if you just MARRIED them.  After a while I can understand his behavior.   I agree that she's boring.  I don't find him boring at all, although together they are boring.

I don't think she's sleeping with him at all.  She probably does the scenes with him in the bed, then splits when the cameras shut off.  That goes for the apple picking and pie baking also.  All for the cameras?  When Molly speaks to Jon, she doesn't seem sincere and looks forced, like she's remembering the script.  I would fall on the floor if they stay together at  decision time.  I still think something happened in the beginning either on the wedding night or early on in the honeymoon.  Maybe he pushed himself on her or got really mad "Like a twelve year old boy" or something gross.   Only Molly knows.

Edited March 14, 2018 by Gem 10

[Lily247]

I think Molly is turned off by Jon's current unemployment situation for sure. In theory it doesn't sound so bad but meeting a new guy who is also your husband and witnessing him not working or being busy at all day after day can definitely be a turn off for many women. 

 

I know several married couples who share a FB account, I think it is just taking precautions. FB has been cited as a reason in what, 20%, of divorces nowadays ? Yes people should absolutely trust each other but the real world, and people, are not perfect like that.

I used to have an aquaintance who is extremely in love with her now-husband. However it is well known among his friends that he cheats on her with anyone he can. One time many years ago he contacted me on a dating site asking me to go out. I told her and she accused me of lying and trying to break her relationship, and screamed at me that why in the world would she not believe her boyfriend?! She then started a smear campaign trying to alienate all my friends away from me. I guess ignorance is bliss for her. I see glimmers of this kind of desperation in Shawniece, I wasn't surprised she didn't press for his phone. Not saying that sneakily going through your partner's phone is a nice thing to do; however if you see warning signs such as 1. He puts a password on his phone and covers his hand anytime he unlocks it 2. He quickly puts his phone away anytime you enter the room   3. He gets phone calls and text messages in the middle of the night   4. Secretive behavior     Then by all means it is one's choice to look the other way or do some sleuthing. 

Edited March 14, 2018 by Lily247

[Ashlyc]

anyone know where i could watch unfiltered? i watch the episodes online/the lifetime app on my i pad. i hear its TERRIBLE but i wanna see it anyway LOL

[BaldBeard]

Anyone else shocked that Molly went with a 7 rating for her marriage?  I was thinking 5 tops!!!

 

I remember reading somewhere recently that people get into relationships expecting their partner to be a complete package, but expecting themselves to be a work in progress, and that seems to hit very close to home with these couples.  Jon and Molly in particular.  I can tell just from what she's said in the past that anything Jon does that might be considered boyish or immature is seen as unattractive to her.  As much as she's very robotic, I think she just doesn't know how to communicate that effectively to Jon.  On Jon's side, I think he goes to humor to cut the tension in awkward situations, which could be seen as immature to Molly, so maybe they just need to grow together a bit.  I also feel like the fact that he's still unemployed is a much bigger issue than either of them are letting on to.  What is he doing all day if not working?

 

I'm a bit shocked that so many people dislike Ryan and are just pointing out the bad things with him.  It wasn't until this episode when Jackie brought up what was bothering her that he just went on the "offensive defense" and really changed my opinion.  It seems like Jackie is trying to tell him that she doesn't like that his overall attitude is one of "me first" instead of us first.  Then he goes off on a tangent talking about how he's only been late twice, missing the point entirely.  What we have to remember is that we're seeing newly developed relationships, and now that their honeymoon phase has worn off, they are starting to see the cracks that everyone in relationships has to deal with.  EDIT - One weird thing about Jackie that I just remembered...Why would you schedule an art outing with a nude model for someone's first time?  Maybe she's trying to get him to try new things, but there are better ways to branch out than going that far!  She should have done painting with wine or something more fun like that.  If she thinks he's going to want to spend more time with her now.....

 

Jepthe really surprised me last night by running off.  I still think they're going to work in the long run, but to react that way in general set off alarms to me. 

Edited March 14, 2018 by BaldBeard

[OnTime]

I don't think I even seen Molly touch Jon  but she rates the marriage a 7.

????

[KateHearts]

12 hours ago, Yeah No said:

I don't really believe Jephte has that much to hide.  He probably just didn't want Shawniece to see texts he made on dating sites right before he got married, and I don't blame him.  I seriously doubt he's got anyone on the hook on the side since getting married.   I thought Shawniece handled this very well.  She is continually impressing me with her maturity.

see, I think she was immature about it. She kept hammering on it (which of course made him shut down and run away) and punctuated the entire conversation with a door slam- and still kept talking. I don't even see the point of the phone exchange. What deep dark awful thing could have been done in a month? Yes, they are "LEGALLY MARRIED," but in terms of where they are in their relationships, it's as if they have just started dating.Yeah, there could be messages from others there, but I'm not sure how much offense the spouses can collect at this point over that.

[Adeejay]

Enough already!  The show is starting to get tedious and boring.  I am glad two couples saw through their desire for drama and refused to participate.  I wasn't surprised Shawniece and Jephte fell for it, after all, I believe it was conceived especially to cause conflict between them.

I am with an incredulous Jon; what world is Molly living in where a sexless marriage gets rated a 7?  In my opinion, she has lost all credibility and is clearly in it for the money.  Wouldn't surprise me if she insists they stay married for an extra six months or however long, in order to get the bonus.  

[Jack Sampson]

43 minutes ago, OnTime said:

I don't think I even seen Molly touch Jon  but she rates the marriage a 7.

????

 

45 minutes ago, BaldBeard said:

Anyone else shocked that Molly went with a 7 rating for her marriage?  I was thinking 5 tops!!!

What did you expect, honest self-awareness?  She's the same girl who's boring as hell but considers herself to be fun and exciting.

[Gobears]

2 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

Ryan and Jackie - - IMO, Ryan's work schedule conflict is completely the fault of the "experts."  They should be asking every participant about their work schedule and ask what is acceptable and what is a deal breaker in a partner.  Ryan is a worker and it sounds like he has been for his entire adult life. Jaclyn wants someone who is going to be home every night.  Sounds like a deal breaker to me. I can't fault Ryan or Jackie for that.  However, Ryan can be a complete dick.  Can he not tell his friends "look, guys, I'll have to see you all in 3 or 4 weeks. Until decision day, I've got to spend time with my wife, get to know her and make the right decision at the end."  Or why not invite Jackie to join him for a little while with his friends and then he and Jackie go home for movie night?  It's not difficult.  If I were Jackie, I'd be very concerned about this and thinking that Ryan isn't putting forth the work necessary and can't even commit to a date night.

It's not just work. Jaclyn said that Ryan owns a paintball field and competes on two different teams so it's like a third job. The movie night was a big deal to Jaclyn because on Unfiltered, she said it was one of the few nights together that wasn't being filmed. Ryan was a jerk because he sacrificed rare private time with his wife to hang out with his friends. 

I wonder why Jonathan and Jaclyn weren't paired. They seem like they would be more compatible. They both like to do active things and seem to want to spend more time with their partners. 

[love2lovebadtv]

3 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I don't think she's sleeping with him at all.  She probably does the scenes with him in the bed, then splits when the cameras shut off.  That goes for the apple picking and pie baking also.  All for the cameras?  When Molly speaks to Jon, she doesn't seem sincere and looks forced, like she's remembering the script.  I would fall on the floor if they stay together at  decision time.  I still think something happened in the beginning either on the wedding night or early on in the honeymoon.  Maybe he pushed himself on her or got really mad "Like a twelve year old boy" or something gross.   Only Molly knows.

Like that honeymoon scene where she went to bed at 5:00 with a full face of makeup? So fake. 

Besides sex, it seemed like Jon was saying there's no affection at all and I see that. The way they interact is distant. 

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, Ashlyc said:

anyone know where i could watch unfiltered? i watch the episodes online/the lifetime app on my i pad. i hear its TERRIBLE but i wanna see it anyway LOL

I'm on east coast and tried to watch but it doesn't repeat and wasn't on demand, so I don't know.  The only way to see it I guess is to tape it half hour before episode starts.  Unless, somebody knows otherwise?  Last night, unfiltered came on after the episode instead of before.  Crazy.

[2727]

On 3/14/2018 at 8:40 AM, walnutqueen said:

I'm expecting you to guilt trip your son into sleuthing for all of us.  ;-)

That's what mothers are for!

Everything suddenly came together for me in one sentence: Ryan talks at people, not to them.

Why is it so hard for Ryan to include Jackie in his plans? Is every work party, paintball game, and drinking night Just For Men? When I first met my husband he had a group of three male friends he'd meet weekly for drinks and dinner. He just ... took me with him.

If I share a bed, bathroom, and bank account with my spouse, I don't see phones as somehow being out of bounds, privacy wise.

Edited March 15, 2018 by 2727

[Gem 10]

12 minutes ago, love2lovebadtv said:

Like that honeymoon scene where she went to bed at 5:00 with a full face of makeup? So fake. 

Besides sex, it seemed like Jon was saying there's no affection at all and I see that. The way they interact is distant. 

Yes, I know what you mean.  There is no affection at all.  No hand holding, no hugs, no kisses .. nothing.  She probably can't stand him .. He might feel the same by now.  Just pretending like everything is o.k.  He does look scary lately with that laugh and menacing look he gives her when he's mad.   I dont understand why an intelligent and  good looking guy like him has to go on a t.v. show to find a wife.  Something's wrong there.  And, those experts didn't catch anything about him?   Maybe I'm wrong.  We'll see.

[Waterlilly]

My son is a firefighter and married (both for 20 years +) those guys are a brotherhood but they are very family oriented.  I didn't understand why Ryan couldn't take Jaclyn to the retirement party, and who has a last minute retirement party anyway.  He is clueless.  I think he wanted a wifey because all the other firefighters have one.  My son works two jobs too and always has, a lot of the guys do, but he is home in the evening.  In our county the shifts are 24 on and 48 off, every 5th week they have a K day which is an extra day off, plenty of vacation days make it a great job for family.  Ryan just bugs me because he doesn't want to meet Jaclyn in the middle, and while I'm at it, I think they come from two different back grounds.

I'm not bashing Molly but she looks very thin, I wonder if her skin problem is related to a health issue.  I do give her points for the card game when Jon bragged about his degrees and certs and she didn't say "at yet you're jobless!"

[humbleopinion]

Ryan: Hey, man... congrats on your retirement!

Friend : Dude, why are you still here?

Ryan: Didn't want to leave before I spoke to you...

Friend: Bro, you spoke to me when you got here at 830pm...

Ryan: I did? Well, guess just want to stay to talk to the other guys...

Friend: Didn't you just get married? Shouldn't you be getting home?

Ryan: She's my wifey...'til death us do part, amiright?

Friend: No...you jerk, you see these dudes all the time, go home to your wife...

Ryan: Nah, she's good....

[silverspoons]

I wish we got to see more about the couples parent's relationship and what their nuclear family was like growing up. I think that would give another important take on Ryan's behavior. He is 29, obviously financially secure (2 jobs, owning multiple properties) and seems on paper ready for marriage.  We saw his parents and they seemed like a nice happily married couple for 30+ years. My guess is he grew up in the type of home where his father worked hard and provided and his mom raised the kids and was into the PTA, scouts, cooking meals for neighbors. His parents maybe took a yearly  vacation and had special evenings once in awhile but both were busy with their own lives. For some reason I can't see Ryan as 100% selfish since he has a hard work ethic and loyality. I think he really thinks that if he works hard and gives a great life to his wife, is present for the big events (births, birthdays anniversary) he does not have to do much more. Jacyln is a needy person, not needy in a bad way but it looking for more in a relationship then a provider.

There are perfect matches for Ryan. There are women who would be thrilled with a man that was financially secure, hard working and let them pursue their own interests and spend times with their friends. It also seems like he has great parents, almost makes me think Jamie would have better off with a Ryan, then chronically underemployed Doug.   

I don't see them working out. You can see Jacyln seems sad in the unfiltered segments. My first husband was a doctor. I could have had everything materially I ever dreamed of but I was lucky to get 1 night a month with him. After he did something to break my trust and thought long and hard about rebuilding trust and if I wanted a life that I had everything materially but no one to share the it with. I left, married a repairman that is home at by 2-3 pm everyday and we spend almost all our time with our kids and and 2-3 hours a night snarking on reality TV. I honestly don't miss a fancier car or house, and after having a serious illness I am so glad I choose a husband who was able and wanted to spend countless night up with me and going to every doctor visit. I'm originally  from MA and there is a women for Ryan, either someone with a career that is their passion and more then a 9-5, or a women that wants secuirty and a large family. Jacyln is neither, she was a best friend spouse and Ryan already seems to have many best friends and Jacyln doesn't want to share.

 

I was confused about the phones. Ryan and Jacyln were pretty straight forward. Then I thought the first clip, Jon said to Molly we would be broken up if you saw what I wrote in my phone? Then they decide later just to trade and not look? Then Jephte suddenly can't even meet half way. Like maybe just sharing some old photos with friends. Maybe he could say he is not ready to show his whole phone but just give a part way try like, here is a photo on me and my buddies on a boat or look at this stupid meme my pal sent me. 

 

Has Molly been in any of the unfiltered segments? I have found the pairings odd and the questions uncomfortable. Jamie isn't the best interviewer to begin with but why would Jon want to be asked what do you think of Shawnice on the stripper pole, or Shawnice what what do you thin of Jon letting Molly see his phone and then she opted not to look. They should not aks questions about the non present couples. I would be happy  ith just bonus footage!

Edited March 14, 2018 by silverspoons

[Gem 10]

Ryan .. It's either Paintball, all activities or Jaclyn for awhile.  Take your pick before you get a divorce.  And stop blabbing about your SCHEDULE.  It's getting annoying.  Guys do more than you, so shut up.

[eyelash]

With so little content and endless repetition of the same scenes, I find I have too much time for shallow thoughts during each episode!

Jephte and Shawniece:  I wonder what made the so-called experts think Jephte was even remotely a good candidate for marrying a stranger.   Shawniece surprises me with her overall patience and maturity.  She looks like a completely different person every time I see her, and I can't help but wonder if that contributes to Jephte's lingering sense that she's a stranger.  I predict they'll choose to stay together:  Shawniece because she's devoted and determined to make this a success, and Jephte simply because he never wants to go through the first 6 weeks of marriage with anyone again.

Ryan and Jackie:  I wish Shawniece would give Jackie some makeup tips.  She always looks like she's using a day off to do a big, greasy head-to-toe moisturizing treatment.  When they were writing their overall marriage happiness scores on those napkins, I couldn't help but think "Use that napkin to blot, Jackie!"  I'm not sure why she or the experts thought she was far enough along in grieving the loss of her last partner to marry a stranger, but I don't think she's harped on it as much as the show would like us to believe.  I've known a lot of guys like Ryan who keep themselves busy "doing" instead of "being" to avoid having to do any self-discovery.  His insecurity is immediately on display in any disagreement -- he just starts insisting Jackie is wrong and keeps talking over her, louder and louder, like an old-school Jerry Springer guest until she gives up.  I predict they will choose to stay together but later divorce.  She'll say he was just unreachable, he will forever insist was because she wasn't over her dead boyfriend.

Jon and Molly:  Molly considers herself adventurous, but it seems to me her idea of having fun is to treat every activity like a competition and try to humiliate or emasculate Jon along the way.  I'm baffled why Jon wants to have sex with her.  But I predict they will choose to stay together, either because there's more positive aspects to their relationship than we're being shown, or simply because neither of them wants to be the first to admit they want out.

[bichonblitz]

6 hours ago, BaldBeard said:

Anyone else shocked that Molly went with a 7 rating for her marriage?

Jon was shocked! He looked at her like Girl, are you crazy?? Then when he said really, a 7? she was a little pissed. I love it when Jon pisses her off. 

[gonecrackers]

I don't have any problem with Jon or his crazy laugh. I do think he deflects with humor, & Molly is annoyed by humor. I also don't think he's pressuring her for sex as much as some affection, (or maybe I'm desensitized after Cody with Danielle last season), but he's definitely frustrated in the friend-zone.

He should grab one of those big glasses of wine, cuddle Dawn (carefully), & focus on sending out many resumes.

Shawniece:  "You leaving?"

Jephte:  "You know they told me to.'

Production:  "Peel out for some extra dramatic flair; if you hit someone it's not our problem."

Ryan, you're confused- the world revolves around the sun, not you & your life with no time for a wife.

[lezlers]

Why is Molly constantly trying to prove to Jon that she needs to get her nails done for "self care"?  Her nails looked perfect.  She obviously gets them done regularly and hasn't stopped.

On ‎3‎/‎13‎/‎2018 at 8:54 PM, Yeah No said:

First Jon says he's just going to wait for Molly to come around and in the very next scene he's arguing with her yet again over not having sex yet.  Dude, suck it up and act like a man, not a spoiled brat whose mommy is denying him the bottle!  I'm not sold on Molly either but I totally understand her feeling too pressured by him.  It started out too subtle to see but now it's getting more obvious.  Then again, she has not adequately communicated to him that she's just taking her time to be really sure, not rejecting him outright either.

I didn't love the phone swap either and don't blame Jon and Molly for agreeing not to do it.  I'm married a long time and I've never seen my husband's phone nor do I want to and vice versa.  Real trust is NOT looking at the phone so why is the show making them do it?  Oh yeah, right, desperation, thanks, @Gem 10.

I don't really believe Jephte has that much to hide.  He probably just didn't want Shawniece to see texts he made on dating sites right before he got married, and I don't blame him.  I seriously doubt he's got anyone on the hook on the side since getting married.   I thought Shawniece handled this very well.  She is continually impressing me with her maturity.

Jaclyn and Ryan - I don't like these two together.  I really don't see them as that much of a match and he tends to come off as an entitled douche.  I said in previous weeks that I think Ryan is Jaclyn's rebound relationship and I still believe that.  Considering the short amount of time they have to get to know each other before decision day, his being absent so much is just irresponsible.  I'd say it's no wonder he hasn't been in a relationship for 9 years.  I think for a guy that young that's a kind of a red flag.  What has he been doing all that time?  Meeting up with his douche bros for late night drinks and hooking up with one night stands?  I know that Jephte hasn't had a relationship in 7 years.  How old his he, 26?  He's probably very inexperienced.  For a guy that went into teaching he certainly lacks interpersonal skills and I think that has a lot to do with his lack of relationship experience.

Where is Molly on "Unfiltered"?  Good question, I've been asking that myself for weeks now. 

Ryan is the worst.  I smiled when Jackie says that he talks "at" her because that's what I've been saying this entire season.  He's always talking "at" people, never really listening to what they're trying to tell him.  He was so hyper defensive he wasn't listening to a word Jackie was saying during that argument.  And really, if he's working full time plus 2 24 hour shifts a week at the firehouse, plus being on 2 different paintball teams PLUS going out with friends 3-4 nights a week, when does Jackie ever actually see him?  You can't build a relationship if the other person is never there.  I think Ryan wanted to be married just to have a wife as a reflection of himself, not because he actually wanted to be in a marriage.  

[lezlers]

On ‎3‎/‎14‎/‎2018 at 6:23 AM, kira28 said:

I've dated a Ryan. Run jackie run!! He's such an asshole. They had a movie night planned and instead he hangs out with friends  and expects her to be OK with that. Omg  I went thru that soo many nights. And  I guarantee Ryan will never change and he will never appreciate Jackie til she leaves and never looks back.  

Jon is way too hung up on sex. Molly's not going to give it up. The more she's around Jon the less attractive he becomes. 

I can't believe they picked these men who haven't been in relationships for 7 years or more!!! How is someone like thst ready for marriage?  

Especially when you know Ryan is only around MAYBE one night a week with everything he's got going on.  Plus, he's disingenuous as hell.  He told his friend Jackie said "do whatever you want, I don't care." and hung up the phone.  She was obviously pissed.  Then he tried to tell her "you said you didn't care."  Come on, man.  He knew damn well she was mad and didn't want him to stay out.  He's a douche and is incredibly self centered.  Jackie seems like a nice girl and can do better.

I'm torn on Molly and Jon.  I don't really understand Molly.  She's said multiple times on the show she finds Jon attractive.  She said her happiness was at a 7.  She said everything is perfect.  Yet, she's not attracted enough to sleep with him or at least have a decent make out session?  It's inconsistent.  There's something going on with her.  So, I feel Jon's frustration and annoyance.  At the same time, I know how annoying it is when your partner is super whiny about not getting sex.  It's a huge turnoff.  So I see both sides.   I just can't get over how strange Molly is being about the whole thing.   She's not being honest and I think that's what's bugging me.

Edited March 15, 2018 by lezlers

[humbleopinion]

Molly is delusional to the point that it is comical, she is incapable of admitting any failures on her part...she couldn't give herself a 3...ever

Jon's guffaw as the reaction to her "7" was the most authentic second of that scripted producer segment.

Molly is getting emotional fulfillment from the ritual of getting her nails done...the more perfect her manicure... the better she feels about herself...

Guess she is funneling her money to her hands when she should throw dollars at a dermatologist to take care of that rough patch on her right cheek.

[Tara Ariano]

23 hours ago, BaldBeard said:

One weird thing about Jackie that I just remembered...Why would you schedule an art outing with a nude model for someone's first time?

There's a 0% chance she planned that. It struck me as pure producer shenanigans.

[gonecrackers]

4 hours ago, lezlers said:

Ryan is the worst.  I smiled when Jackie says that he talks "at" her because that's what I've been saying this entire season.  He's always talking "at" people, never really listening to what they're trying to tell him.  He was so hyper defensive he wasn't listening to a word Jackie was saying during that argument. 

That conversation showed Ryan at his most toxic yet.  He did not deserve an apology from Jaclyn.  He does deserve a swift kick in the arse, hopefully strong enough to land him on the curb.

 

20 hours ago, eyelash said:

Molly considers herself adventurous, but it seems to me her idea of having fun is to treat every activity like a competition and try to humiliate or emasculate Jon along the way.

Yes, she's quite the adventurous apple picker, that one.  She said she went to a 'performing arts' school; maybe she's different IRL, but that doesn't seem to fit her lack of onscreen personality.

I think Molly really wanted to be the alpha in the relationship & that's not working out for her, unless they're baking. 

Maybe she'll show him a few moves on the trapeze next week (geez, really producton???) - I also thought she told Jon she's a contortionist, then is actually surprised the guy is frustrated as hell.

 

4 hours ago, humbleopinion said:

Molly is getting emotional fulfillment from the ritual of getting her nails done...the more perfect her manicure... the better she feels about herself...

Guess she is funneling her money to her hands when she should throw dollars at a dermatologist to take care of that rough patch on her right cheek.

She says 'goodnite' with full makeup, including lipstick. She's not even trying to fake a little authenticity.

Maybe she's concerned about Jon sweating her makeup mask off during sex. 

Edited March 15, 2018 by gonecrackers

[KateHearts]

The more I watch Molly the less I like her. Also the comments that go like "I could see myself maybe possibly someday being attracted to Jon..." are purely dodges that keep her in the game and on TV while not really building anything with this guy. Reminds me of the squeaky-voiced gym owner guy and the dietician girl from last season.  She's not into him. At all. They act like brother and sister.