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Season 5 Discussion

Drogo

By Drogo
in 90 Day Fiancé

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noveltylibrary

noveltylibrary

On 12/19/2017 at 1:00 AM, magemaud said:

Who the hell makes a big deal about their 28th birthday? It’s not like it’s some kind of milestone. 

She's a stunted child, just look who raised her.  But really I felt a *twinge* of bad for her that it was on her bday.  And he tries to tell her it HAD to be that date.

On 12/22/2017 at 7:14 AM, sasha206 said:

Shaun Robinson is truly the worst.  All she does is act like every morsel that comes out of their mouths is shocking but rarely asks a good follow-up question.  If she doesn't ignore a nugget like that, she'll do this:   "Wowwwwwwww.  He just said you're a punk. Wowwwwwwww.  I mean woowwwwwwwww.   How do you feel about that?"  

i can't believe she's lasted this long but then again does this crap show deserve a decent host?

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Desert Rat

Desert Rat

10 minutes ago, noveltylibrary said:

She's a stunted child, just look who raised her.  But really I felt a *twinge* of bad for her that it was on her bday.  And he tries to tell her it HAD to be that date.

I don't like to celebrate my birthday, but I did feel bad for Ashley because it's an important day for her.  Pour David had 89 other days for the wedding, but he HAD to do it on his estranged daughter's birthday. What a jerk!! 

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jumper sage

jumper sage

22 hours ago, lezlers said:

Doubtful.  I'm the youngest in our family and birthdays for everyone are still highly revered.  Just because you don't care about your birthday doesn't mean no one does.  ;)

No one does!  Birthdays for kids is one thing but for adults - we don't care.  I have friends who do birthday weekends.  LOL I never participate for I think it is ridiculous.

35 minutes ago, Desert Rat said:

I don't like to celebrate my birthday, but I did feel bad for Ashley because it's an important day for her.  Pour David had 89 other days for the wedding, but he HAD to do it on his estranged daughter's birthday. What a jerk!! 

I am guessing he did not even know it was her birthday.  She should have just stayed home if her birthday was that big of a deal.  Looks like no one else in her family cared either.  She acted like a 2 year old.

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NinaH

NinaH

33 minutes ago, jumper sage said:

No one does!  Birthdays for kids is one thing but for adults - we don't care.  I have friends who do birthday weekends.  LOL I never participate for I think it is ridiculous.

 

Same. There's 365 days in a year and a gajillion people on the planet. Ones birthday isn't a rare, unique occasion.  I'm all for acknowledging it and celebrating it if you so choose, but there's no need to be over the top. 

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Desert Rat

Desert Rat

2 hours ago, NinaH said:

Same. There's 365 days in a year and a gajillion people on the planet. Ones birthday isn't a rare, unique occasion.  I'm all for acknowledging it and celebrating it if you so choose, but there's no need to be over the top. 

Exactly. Everyone has a birthday, so mine's not really special, except to my parents who birthed me.  That's why what David did was so nasty.  

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lezlers

lezlers

6 hours ago, jumper sage said:

No one does!  Birthdays for kids is one thing but for adults - we don't care.  I have friends who do birthday weekends.  LOL I never participate for I think it is ridiculous.

I am guessing he did not even know it was her birthday.  She should have just stayed home if her birthday was that big of a deal.  Looks like no one else in her family cared either.  She acted like a 2 year old.

I meant that just because you don't care about your birthday doesn't mean no adult cares about THEIRS.   In fact, I know many more adults who care about their bday and enjoy celebrating it than don't.  

No one likes a birthday Grinch.  ;)

1 hour ago, Pachengala said:

Wow, I'm surprised--I thought everyone loved his/her own birthday! Ah well, different strokes!

I know, right?  This thread is getting depressing.   So much birthday hate/apathy.  It's kind of sad.   I'm a pretty celebratory person in general though, I like celebrating things and making things special, it's fun.  A birthday is just an excuse to make a special day for someone (or yourself.)

  • Love 9
AZChristian

AZChristian

My birthday is 9 days before Christmas.  It's easy for it to be lost in the middle of preparations for celebrating a more important birthday.

We developed a tradition . . . on my birthday, I get to do whatever I want.  After the kids left home, hubby and I would always take that day off from work, and we would go Christmas shopping together.  His gift to me was to not whine.  LOL.  We would often pick out something we would like, and then the person who picked it out would wander away while the other paid for it.  Then we'd take our gifts home, wrap them, and put them under the tree.  It was fun to act all surprised at how we each got EXACTLY WHAT WE WANTED!!!!

Of course, now that we're in our 70s, we genuinely forget over those 9 days what we picked out for ourselves, so it really is more of a surprise when we open the gifts.  LOL.  

Bottom line . . . IMO, everyone should have the birthday they want to have.  But if a situation is out of your control, deal with it without making yourself look bad.

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Semanire

Semanire

I feel for Ashley over the whole Birthday thing. Those of you that don't get it, haven't been in a similar situation. My mom married her (asshole) husband on December 23. Not my birthday, but has made for constant year after year ackward situations. We don't always celebrate family Christmas, and work together to try and find days around Christmas for everyone. The 23 is always out because that day is now about her and her husband, it is not about family. This would be the same with Ashley. Even if her and her father were to reconcile, he has taken her day and made it about him. No matter what, that day will now also be about his anniversary. Take his daughter out for dinner? No, can't, it's his anniversary. As others have said there are how many other days, this is just more hurt added to the plate if hurt and abandonment Ashley is dealing with. It straight up says he doesn't care about her. Yeah Ashley is intense, but having been through similar parental hurt, I get it. There is nothing harder than loosing a parent who is still physically on this earth. 

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NinaH

NinaH

(edited)

My birthday is Jan 3, so being 9 days after Christmas it was just always a let down. It seemed like the weather was always dismal, cold and rainy, and usually the day school started back. No one ever remembered bc we were focused on having to go back to school. My parents always acknowledged it, but it wasn't ever anything special. And my gifts usually didn't amount to much since they had just had to spend money for Christmas. That doesn't mean that I was abused, neglected or to sound woe is me. It just never was a big deal. So in adulthood, it's not a big deal. So when I hear of an ADULT bemoaning their special day, it sounds silly to me.  Like, I had to suck it up as a kid, you can suck it up now. 

But I'm all for anybody else celebrating their birthday as they see fit, but am also for people keeping it in perspective, and not acting like everybody should take notice and treat it like a rarefied occasion. 

As for Ashley, her dad having his wedding on her birthday won't be the last time he will let her down. She needs to decide what she can and cannot or will not deal with and adjust her expectations accordingly. Or really, just not have any, that way she won't ever be disappointed again. 

Edited by NinaH
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Desert Rat

Desert Rat

(edited)
1 hour ago, AZChristian said:

My birthday is 9 days before Christmas.  It's easy for it to be lost in the middle of preparations for celebrating a more important birthday.

We developed a tradition . . . on my birthday, I get to do whatever I want.  After the kids left home, hubby and I would always take that day off from work, and we would go Christmas shopping together.  His gift to me was to not whine.  LOL.  We would often pick out something we would like, and then the person who picked it out would wander away while the other paid for it.  Then we'd take our gifts home, wrap them, and put them under the tree.  It was fun to act all surprised at how we each got EXACTLY WHAT WE WANTED!!!!

Of course, now that we're in our 70s, we genuinely forget over those 9 days what we picked out for ourselves, so it really is more of a surprise when we open the gifts.  LOL.  

Bottom line . . . IMO, everyone should have the birthday they want to have.  But if a situation is out of your control, deal with it without making yourself look bad.

My youngest son's birthday is December 20th. Little kids are so busy in December with Christmas programs, parties, etc. that we usually celebrated his birthday right after Christmas.   He didn't care. When he was little, we would have New Year's Eve birthday bash sleep over parties for all his friends. We did these sleep overs for about six years. These were so much fun, and the other parents loved them because they could go out for New Year's eve.  

Back to the show. If I ever did remarry, I would never have my wedding on one of my kid's birthdays.  No way. I would not want to risk offending them and those days are special to me because they are my babies and I will not forget the agony I endured bringing them into the world. 

Edited by Desert Rat
Trying to keep it relevant.
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Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

My birthday is January 7th - the week we always went back to school.  Suck it up.  Plus I was (still am) a native Minnesota gal - it is ALWAYS seven degrees on my birthday!  LOL!  But you suck it up as it is your birthday.  I am cool about it - what else can I do?  Ashley reminds me of my ex husband.....he HAD to take his birthday off from work, even as a grown ass man.  Now before anyone throws tomatoes at me, he needed to grow up in many other ways - this was just icing on his toddler cake.  Takes his damn birthday off but a day off for something special for the kids?  No, can't do that.  (Inhale, exhale.)

But Ashley had a point - out of all the days leading up to the wedding you could not pick the day before dumbass?  But these two have a stormy pass, this just adds to it.  To show up and bitch never helps.  I got remarried and this fall and no, it never occurred to me get married on a child's birthday.  (We did have to avoid the anniversary of my dad's passing - lol - bad mojo.)

And I love my birthday!!  (Jesus and Elvis were Capricorns!!!)

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merylinkid

merylinkid

"I moved to Kentucky to be closer to my kids.   Oh by the way, I'm getting married on your birthday.   See how much closer we are already?"   

Yes, she should not have shown up just to bitch.   As someone noted above, she needs to accept she is never going to have the relationship she wants with her dad.   She needs to either have the relationship he wants, or cut her losses and move on.   He is not going to change.   She can only change her reaction to him.

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Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

4 hours ago, merylinkid said:

"I moved to Kentucky to be closer to my kids.   Oh by the way, I'm getting married on your birthday.   See how much closer we are already?"   

Yes, she should not have shown up just to bitch.   As someone noted above, she needs to accept she is never going to have the relationship she wants with her dad.   She needs to either have the relationship he wants, or cut her losses and move on.   He is not going to change.   She can only change her reaction to him.

Bolding mine as I can totally see David Pour having this exact attitude!!!  

Per the second part of your post:  Look, I had a mom (she has since passed) who had her two favorite kids (my older bro and older sis) and I was like an extra that she never really understood nor really tried.  No bitching and moaning, we just never super close like a of moms and daughters.  And that is okay - I accepted it, loved her and respected her but knew around age 12 that it just was not gonna be what I wanted - and that was a-okay.  (Guess which child moved in with her to take care of her for about 18 months before she passed?  Hi me!)   The point?  Ashley:  Accept your dad is douche, lower your expectations, find your groove and just live your life.  Your dad and his horrid fashion sense are not gonna change, so stop trying to change him in any way.

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AZChristian

AZChristian

19 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

Bolding mine as I can totally see David Pour having this exact attitude!!!  

Per the second part of your post:  Look, I had a mom (she has since passed) who had her two favorite kids (my older bro and older sis) and I was like an extra that she never really understood nor really tried.  No bitching and moaning, we just never super close like a of moms and daughters.  And that is okay - I accepted it, loved her and respected her but knew around age 12 that it just was not gonna be what I wanted - and that was a-okay.  (Guess which child moved in with her to take care of her for about 18 months before she passed?  Hi me!)   The point?  Ashley:  Accept your dad is douche, lower your expectations, find your groove and just live your life.  Your dad and his horrid fashion sense are not gonna change, so stop trying to change him in any way.

I sure understand your second paragraph.  My "mother" had 5 kids.  If she listed them in order of her favorites on down, I was #6.  Sad, but true.  Her loss.

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calpurnia99

calpurnia99

I KNEW the job he was going to get in Kentucky was working in some way for Chris. Who is going to hire this asshole? And Nikki made it seem like a big deal: Any money you give him he has to EARN! So now Chris can come up with some unneeded job, overpay David Poor for this so-called "job", let him do a shitty job at this made-up job, and never fire him. I saw that coming a MILE AWAY! All the money is still going to be coming from Chris. 

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NinaH

NinaH

15 minutes ago, calpurnia99 said:

I KNEW the job he was going to get in Kentucky was working in some way for Chris. Who is going to hire this asshole? And Nikki made it seem like a big deal: Any money you give him he has to EARN! So now Chris can come up with some unneeded job, overpay David Poor for this so-called "job", let him do a shitty job at this made-up job, and never fire him. I saw that coming a MILE AWAY! All the money is still going to be coming from Chris. 

I hope one day we find out what kind of hold or threat David has on Chris for Chris to be his sugar daddy.  And for Nicki to tolerate what she does. Unless she was told from the get-go how it is and will always be and she decided to deal with it as best as she could in her way. 

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calpurnia99

calpurnia99

On 12/20/2017 at 0:23 AM, rideashire said:

Not sure if anyone already mentioned this but why the hell would David schedule his wedding on his daughter's birthday in the first place? I'm not saying she wasn't 100% obnoxious about the whole thing, she was. And I know they aren't close, but this choice just strikes me as really weird. But everything about David is strange. Maybe it was a dig at his kid for being so against Annie?

 

I

To me it seems like the place they wanted to do it at said - well we do these on Friday nights. And her birthday happened to fall on a Friday night, so it was so stupid.  or his friends were flying in that weekend, and the wedding needed to be on a weekend, so they had one weekend and one date. I mean this kind of thing happens all the time when you are trying to schedule something. You don't have the option of doing it any day of the week or any time of the month. 

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lezlers

lezlers

(edited)
On ‎12‎/‎26‎/‎2017 at 5:26 PM, AZChristian said:

My birthday is 9 days before Christmas.  It's easy for it to be lost in the middle of preparations for celebrating a more important birthday.

We developed a tradition . . . on my birthday, I get to do whatever I want.  After the kids left home, hubby and I would always take that day off from work, and we would go Christmas shopping together.  His gift to me was to not whine.  LOL.  We would often pick out something we would like, and then the person who picked it out would wander away while the other paid for it.  Then we'd take our gifts home, wrap them, and put them under the tree.  It was fun to act all surprised at how we each got EXACTLY WHAT WE WANTED!!!!

Of course, now that we're in our 70s, we genuinely forget over those 9 days what we picked out for ourselves, so it really is more of a surprise when we open the gifts.  LOL.  

Bottom line . . . IMO, everyone should have the birthday they want to have.  But if a situation is out of your control, deal with it without making yourself look bad.

Responded before seeing the mod comment.  

Edited by lezlers
AZChristian

AZChristian

13 hours ago, calpurnia99 said:

To me it seems like the place they wanted to do it at said - well we do these on Friday nights. And her birthday happened to fall on a Friday night, so it was so stupid.  or his friends were flying in that weekend, and the wedding needed to be on a weekend, so they had one weekend and one date. I mean this kind of thing happens all the time when you are trying to schedule something. You don't have the option of doing it any day of the week or any time of the month. 

But they got married on November 1st by all accounts . . . which was a Wednesday.  

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Baltimore Betty

Baltimore Betty

3 minutes ago, AZChristian said:

And be sure to send a note a week ahead of time to remind David's daughter . . . just in case she forgets THEY GOT MARRIED ON HER BIRTHDAY!!!!

David could have had a birthday cake for his daughter at the wedding, people do it all the time for elderly relatives etc...I may just friend my birthday twin on FB.

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Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

I was thinking of the whole "I will just move to Moracco, y'all!" veiled threat from Jabba the Blond.  We can all be pretty sure she would do it, but would Azan, at that point, shut her down?  Would he really come clean and say, "Look, this is just not for me, and really, life in Morocco is not for you.  You can come here as that is your right but not to be with me.  I am over and out."  Hmmm......

Would Nicole listen?  Would Nicole hear "Blah blah blah......life in Morocco....blah blah....." 

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ALittleShelfish

ALittleShelfish

55 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

I was thinking of the whole "I will just move to Moracco, y'all!" veiled threat from Jabba the Blond.  We can all be pretty sure she would do it, but would Azan, at that point, shut her down?  Would he really come clean and say, "Look, this is just not for me, and really, life in Morocco is not for you.  You can come here as that is your right but not to be with me.  I am over and out."  Hmmm......

Would Nicole listen?  Would Nicole hear "Blah blah blah......life in Morocco....blah blah....." 

She'd want to talk about it.  But he won't talk to her.  She'll keep telling him she wants to talk.  He'll repeat "You can come here, but..." and she'll repeat "Let's just talk. Why won't you talk to me?" And we'll all be trapped in this terrible circle that none of us can get out of. 

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Kareem

Kareem

1 hour ago, ALittleShelfish said:

She'd want to talk about it.  But he won't talk to her.  She'll keep telling him she wants to talk.  He'll repeat "You can come here, but..." and she'll repeat "Let's just talk. Why won't you talk to me?" And we'll all be trapped in this terrible circle that none of us can get out of. 

And as she pummels her beloved, her mama will watch it and say to all within earshot, "I'm really afraid this could escalate", as if A-man would suddenly punch her in in the head or something.  I really pray she meant Nicole when when she said that... 

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Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

3 minutes ago, Lady Iris said:

Aww man! I can't stop giggling at this. I read this when it posted and I'm still tee-heeing. Now I don't condone domestic abuse in any way shape or form but when you put it that way in words...well, I just can't help it.

No kidding!! Nicole, physical aggression is never okay.  Nicole does like to talk a lot, or least WANT to talk a lot to Azan.  To her parents, not so much.

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sasha206

sasha206

On 12/26/2017 at 9:08 PM, Semanire said:

I feel for Ashley over the whole Birthday thing. Those of you that don't get it, haven't been in a similar situation. My mom married her (asshole) husband on December 23. Not my birthday, but has made for constant year after year ackward situations. We don't always celebrate family Christmas, and work together to try and find days around Christmas for everyone. The 23 is always out because that day is now about her and her husband, it is not about family. This would be the same with Ashley. Even if her and her father were to reconcile, he has taken her day and made it about him. No matter what, that day will now also be about his anniversary. Take his daughter out for dinner? No, can't, it's his anniversary. As others have said there are how many other days, this is just more hurt added to the plate if hurt and abandonment Ashley is dealing with. It straight up says he doesn't care about her. Yeah Ashley is intense, but having been through similar parental hurt, I get it. There is nothing harder than loosing a parent who is still physically on this earth. 

I'm with you.

Ashley is certainly rough around the edges. But her asshole father has spent a lifetime making chasing tail more important than being a father.  So this is just symobolic of her whole life with him -- the tail he is chasing gets to have her "special day" on his child's birthday.  It's disgusting.  

  • Love 4
Lady Iris

Lady Iris

3 minutes ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

No kidding!! Nicole, physical aggression is never okay.  Nicole does like to talk a lot, or least WANT to talk a lot to Azan.  To her parents, not so much.

Ugh, she just squints and shrugs her shoulders and the girl just doesn't have a clue. It's painful to watch.

 

I really hope that someday I can use "pummels her beloved" into another conversation.

  • Love 1
Mrs. Hanson

Mrs. Hanson

5 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

I'm with you.

Ashley is certainly rough around the edges. But her asshole father has spent a lifetime making chasing tail more important than being a father.  So this is just symobolic of her whole life with him -- the tail he is chasing gets to have her "special day" on his child's birthday.  It's disgusting.  

I agree with you guys on the thing - some people it is not a big deal but to Ashley it was, David should have respected it and he didn't.  

 

6 minutes ago, sasha206 said:

No matter what, that day will now also be about his anniversary. Take his daughter out for dinner? No, can't, it's his anniversary.

I didn't think of that - "sorry honey, I am gonna backburner you every year no"  You wanna join us for a two for $20 special at Applebee's for our anniversary?  We will splurge and get the molten lava cake for your birthday, in other words:  Anniversary dinner first, birthday celebration second.  

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magemaud

magemaud

(edited)
5 hours ago, Mrs. Hanson said:

"Look, this is just not for me, and really, life in Morocco is not for you.  You can come here as that is your right but not to be with me.

Even if Azan tried to explain things, this is what thick headed Nicole would selectively hear: "Look, this is just not  for me, and really, life in Morocco is not for you.  You can come here as that is your right but not  to be with me."

And Nicole even admits that she doesn't want to tell her mother the truth, so Robbalee is only getting a highly watered down one side of the story. After the "second cheating" argument Nicole called her mother (and said she hadn't been in touch for a while, citing internet problems-the Moroccan internet seems to work selectively for her) but said on camera, "I don't want to tell her the truth about why we argued" and when her mother asked what was wrong, Nicole just said she was "tired." 

Edited by magemaud
  • Love 2
millennium

millennium

(edited)
On 12/23/2017 at 10:46 AM, marionette said:

After watching the tell all, I am so over this show. 

  I'll probably still watch next season but I realized during the tell-all that I am so over this particular group of people.   In the end, the majority of them proved to be unremarkable and boring.   The only standouts were Luis (who made me laugh a lot), Molly, who defied my tendency to find something good in every woman (although -- and this is just a guess -- I think she'd be great at hog calling, "Sooooeeeeee!"), and David Poor, whom I regard as a bloated, parasitic larva.  Nicole doesn't make the list because she's old hat by now.  The rest were red herrings, much ado about nothing.

Now I'm seeing promos for follow-up specials like "Nicole and Azan, The Road So Far" or "Andrei and Elizabeth, Can They Make It?" (or some shit like that) and I feel a little ashamed for having watched the mother ship.   I can't put it into words, but seeing the soulless emptiness of this show dragged out into additional segments, milking the participants for every last bit of meaninglessness that can be squeezed out of them, makes me feel like I've been had.  

Edited by millennium
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