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Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!


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Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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I agree, Yogi...I'm a total disaster organization-wise, and I need advance warning before having visitors at my apartment. But I also didn't go on national TV and tell everyone that Jesus divined my place to be in the home where I live to serve my headship and birth his babies. Nor do I take selfies and post them all #messyroom #underwearonfloor #paynoattentiontothatbonginthecorner and still expect to be praised for it.

 Edited 4 hours ago by Aja.

Screwed up the quote but...I love you, Aja.  And Derick has a good profile.  Should only be photographed from the side.

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5 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Most of us were writing essays by middle school.

And back in the day we were writing what was called reports in middle school. For us it was a cursory introduction into writing a paper using other sources. We were taught about quotes, bibliographies and plagiarism.

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4 hours ago, Saytura said:

My mother in law is part of a woman's-only bible study that's part of a national group affiliated with the Baptists, I think.  I usually start tuning her out when she starts in on it.  It's offered through her church, but you don't have to be a member to join and many churches offer it.  It's supposed to teach you the bible from the woman's perspective.  She does say it's pretty intense and harder then some of her basic college courses.  I forget the name of it off the top of my head.  Each "semester" they concentrate on one section of the bible, so you have to go for many years if you want to learn the whole thing.

They do have homework they do on a weekly basis in the form of "questions".  You can answer them in any format, but it's supposed to help you for the next week's lesson.  If you don't do the questions, you're screwed at the lesson since they expect you to do the homework.  I think my MIL said the instructor will read their answers, but nothing is for a "grade".  I'm sure if it's tied to the SBC, Derick makes Jill do a decent job so she makes a good impression to any higher-ups that would evaluate them for placement one day.  It's also a good way to get Jill introduced to high-level thought processes without the pressure of a pass/fail grade.

Yeah, my mother is also and has led an independent one, and/but I'm pretty sure she refers to it as "writing a lesson plan for Bible study" or similar.  I mean, you can use a concordance and things and I should think most people pattern their Bible studies after their ministers who are hopefully using and cross referencing 5-6 different scripture passages; but I've never heard of anyone trying to dress it up as a "research paper".  There also are good and rigorous Bible studies which attempt to draw in and from Latin and Koine, and also things like "the Bible as history" which helps thinking; but I don't know which one would require "research papers", especially when the people in question are taking these extremely voluntarily and (presumably) for free, with no expectation of its leading to a degree in anything.  I in fact would think it was a great thing, if someone had a curriculum that made Jill write a research paper.  She could spread the gospel of its difficult rewarding worthiness amongst her siblings.

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Jill is like a guy I knew at work.  He talked and talked about his extensive research into a subject.  I finally asked him about the research.  He had read an encyclopedia article.  Jill thinks she's produced some real research because this is probably the first time she's been supposed to do a little bit of thinking rather than parrot memorization.

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34 minutes ago, Absolom said:

Jill is like a guy I knew at work.  He talked and talked about his extensive research into a subject.  I finally asked him about the research.  He had read an encyclopedia article.  Jill thinks she's produced some real research because this is probably the first time she's been supposed to do a little bit of thinking rather than parrot memorization.

And poor Jill probably accessed some .com page with more advertisements than any actually 'information'.

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2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I'm sure I'm not alone in having gone to my friends houses when I was younger and noticing differences. Whether it be table manners, bedtime routines, parenting styles, etc. And in school the differences between two English teachers classes or a couple of professors' courses. Or in regard to a research paper, the different citing styles, e.g. APA, MLA or Chicago.

It is things like this the Duggar 19 have never really experienced. And because they have never experienced them they are totally clueless. So like many of you said Jill has no idea what a real research paper is. The closest she has probably come to citing something is chapter and verse from the Bible. 

I work at the community college level. Chicago has pretty much fallen out of favor. MLA just changed this fall to make students add the actual websites to their Works Cited pages. Before this, they could just mention the title of the website and label it " Web" at the end. I guess they found that instances of plagiarism spiked. I doubt Jill even had to worry about writing in any of the accepted academic styles. Does she even know what plagiarism is? (I lead workshops about how to avoid it every semester.)  I  also doubt she's ever properly parenthetically cited anything in her life other than chapter and verse.  Has she ever even put the Bible in a Works Cited/Bibliography? The class I saw her participating in was using a source outside of the bible. Good luck citing that (or any other outside source) for evidence in your paper, dearie! LMAO 

Edited by Sew Sumi
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4 hours ago, Portia said:

The 1990s Satanic Panic foolishness was even worse in Arkansas because of the West Memphis Three child murders.  (Not-so-fun fact: I lived in West Memphis for many years, including the time of the WM3 murders and trials. I know now that the WM3 case was a massive miscarriage of justice, but I've got to admit, at the time I was sure the police had caught the right guys, and I got nervous every time I saw a teenager with dyed hair and a black t-shirt.)

I lived in Memphis when the murders occurred and the resulting Satanic Panic was unreal and just bizarre to me. 

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3 hours ago, MargeGunderson said:

I lived in Memphis when the murders occurred and the resulting Satanic Panic was unreal and just bizarre to me. 

Yeah, I remember hearing about that. Backward messages in records, and alt these bands were so bad, fire and brimstone, breaking, and burning records.. My argument was if a band was really into that sort of thing, they'd play it forward and reflect it in their album art.

The Dug kids would never do the kind of critical thinking required to come to that conclusion. They aren't even allowed to listen to Christian pop or rock.

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As a retired teacher, I must say that I often thought substitute teaching was the hardest job at the school.  If Derick survived the day with the public high school students staying on task at all, then I am impressed.

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On 10/2/2016 at 8:31 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Apparently, no prior teaching experience (or certification or fingerprinting, etc) is required to substitute teach in the state of Arkansas. And even more shocking, he's at Springdale High! PUBLIC SCHOOL!!!!!!11111 

Some states, such as South Dakota and South Carolina, don't even require a high school diploma or GED. And many many states require a high school diploma only. Substitutes are hard to come by, you don't get paid much and it can be hard work. ... And we don't much believe in education in this country anyway.      The whole sad story is here.  http://www.nea.org/home/14813.htm

I'm actually glad that Derick goes after jobs that aren't supplied by JimBob or yet another shady churchie thing like SOS, goes after a job like teaching that's the kind of thing I think he actually might be suited for if he got a little more of the appropriate training, and that he goes after a job in a public high school -- shows he thinks they're not Satanic!

Edited by Churchhoney
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18 hours ago, Zella said:

I bet you're right! I was just on their website, looking at their Bible study groups, and it seems like they do have a lot of them. 

Edited to add: How common is it for churches to have research papers for their Bible study classes? I've never been to small group study session and wasn't sure if that was a standard operating procedure or not. Also wondering what Jill is defining as a research paper. . . . 

It probably isn't a research paper as most of us would define that. It's probably more like a report that involves looking some stuff up in a bible dictionary and an encyclopedia or something. But honestly it makes me very happy that she's doing even this. Because I doubt she did at the esteemed "Duggar Academy."

Just as with the two-bit midwife course, I'm still pleased that Jill goes after studying even to this degree. Shows that, somewhere in there, she's not totally brain dead and 1000 percent self-satisfied, as so many of the other Duggars seem to be. I keep thinking of Jed, Jer and Joy being so ecstatic to be done with book-larnin' at their "grad" celebrations. And I'm sure that's what the Duggs are taught to be. So every little thing that Jill or any of the others does in this direction is tiny step away from the family principles, I expect. And shows some energy and curiosity that they're not supposed to have.

Nobody'll leave this mess in a single leap or become a person with a normal education in one bound. So as long as somebody's taking baby steps and being proud of "research papers," no matter how lame those papers may be, I'm impressed, actually. Because it's outside the Duggar/Gothard box.

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18 hours ago, yogi2014L said:

Seriously I would bet my paycheck Jilly couldn't write a research paper if her life depended on it. Which is sad, and not totally her fault, but enough already with the over inflated 'accomplishments'. 

 

I'd say it's not her fault in the least. She didn't brainwash herself or "educate" herself to be this ignorant. Her parents did.

And, honestly, I expect that a three-paragraph paper about something she looked up in the dictionary and a kids' encyclopedia is a lot, considering where she's starting from and the mindset she's been told is the godly one. If she were some poor uneducated adult from the deepest ghetto or tiniest poverty-stricken mountain village, she wouldn't have grown up in a environment more hostile to education than the one she's been raised in, in my opinion. And wouldn't we all applaud people from those situations who started small steps toward a more educated approach? Seems to me we generally would. And when you don't know , you're going to overestimate. I'm excited that she would even aspire to education enough to want to brag about it, actually.

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16 hours ago, MunichNark said:

Is that something unusual? It's perfectly normal here

Because religion here tends to be so fervent, and because of a very old history of anti-Catholic sentiment, there's always been (completely justifiable) fear here that religion classes would be indoctrination rather than information. So many places have chosen not to bring the subject up at all.

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15 minutes ago, Annb67 said:

God....D's face. I can't figure it out. Like what the hell?

As has been discussed upthread, he had maxillofacial surgery last year. At least one person familiar with that surgery has posted info. IIRC, it's a multi-procedure thing, and he probably has at least one more surgical procedure in his future. Which I hope will leave him finally with his face/jaw/mouth in better alignment.

Since they've returned to Arkansas, he seems a lot cleaner and tidier than he did in the Danger America photos. I can't get into snarking over his facial appearance especially in light of the medical/surgical thing, but I'm glad he's cleaned up and I'm fine with the manbun.

Edited to add: I agree with @Churchhoney about Jill's ongoing educational efforts. I suspect Derick's been encouraging and helping her, which is probably why I feel more positively about him than anybody else in that GawdAwful Fustercluck Family.

Edited by Jeeves
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23 hours ago, tabloidlover said:

 

What kind of dorm room living are they doing??  That is the messiest bedroom for 2 grown ass adults with a toddler running around!!   What the hell are they thinking????  The bed isn't even made, it's just a bunch of sheets in a pile.  I just can't with the pure laziness of Jill.  Your ONE job is to be a housewife for fuck's sake!  You don't have to go to a job, you don't have to tend to your twelve thousand siblings any longer, all you have to do is keep your own home up.  Seriously.

Thank you.  If you feel the insatiable need to post a selfie in your bedroom, why not take the crap from the floor, toss it in the red basket, shove the basket out of the way, MAKE THE BED, and then take the selfie?  Because if Jill took this to indicate how smart she is (research paper, y'all!), she missed the mark entirely, as the focus of this picture for me is the hoarding over most of the floor and the fact that none of the female Duggars have ever learned how to make a bed.

I do find it humorous that she hashtagged #messyroom.  If you're that aware that it's a mess...clean it?  I don't understand.

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1 minute ago, Jeeves said:

As has been discussed upthread, he had maxillofacial surgery last year. At least one person familiar with that surgery has posted info. IIRC, it's a multi-procedure thing, and he probably has at least one more surgical procedure in his future. Which I hope will leave him finally with his face/jaw/mouth in better alignment.

Since they've returned to Arkansas, he seems a lot cleaner and tidier than he did in the Danger America photos. I can't get into snarking over his facial appearance especially in light of the medical/surgical thing, but I'm glad he's cleaned up and I'm fine with the manbun.

I think a lot of the Danger America scuzziness was due to heat humidity and lack of running water. he gets a pass from me lol

ITA about the man bun I think it suits him. And good for him for subbing and good for Jilly with her 'research' paper. Who knows maybe JIlly will be first to be free. I think Izzy will actually get a real education- Dereck had to be traumatized by the hordes of uneducated Duggars and knows Jill isn't qualified to teach.

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25 minutes ago, laurakaye said:

Thank you.  If you feel the insatiable need to post a selfie in your bedroom, why not take the crap from the floor, toss it in the red basket, shove the basket out of the way, MAKE THE BED, and then take the selfie?  Because if Jill took this to indicate how smart she is (research paper, y'all!), she missed the mark entirely, as the focus of this picture for me is the hoarding over most of the floor and the fact that none of the female Duggars have ever learned how to make a bed.

I do find it humorous that she hashtagged #messyroom.  If you're that aware that it's a mess...clean it?  I don't understand.

I'm terribly messy right now, since I'm in the middle of a massive purge and due to the lack of work situation, I have zero fucks to give most days as to whether or not I get it done. My husband, like me is equally ADHD and untidy, otherwise, my life would be a living hell right now.

That said, if I want to take a pic with my phone or camera, I keep the junk out the pic. Jill doesn't even bother to do that. Maybe it was just an Internet FU. Some people really don't care. But, if being a wife and mother or house husband is your life's purpose, then what excuse do you have for NOT cleaning up? I'm thinking she's got some sort of depression/ ADHD or both going on.

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I don't agree with very much about Duggarism, but I try to keep in mind that the "kids" are actually quite young still. This gives me hope that they all have the potential to grow emotionally and intellectually. The Duggar kids might have trouble breaking away from Gothardism on their own but it looks to me like the spouses might be helpful in that regard, little by little.

I like seeing Derick in a classroom and I like hearing that Jill is writing a paper. Derick actually always looks like a happy guy to me. I hope he has brought joy and mental stimulation into Jill's life, and that they are forging their own path, independent of any previous programming. Same with Jessa and Ben. I hope they are hip-hopping around the house on a regular basis. 

I also continue to applaud the man bun, and Ben seems to have lost the "straight-up hair hat," as one Duggar Family blog commenter once put it. 

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21 hours ago, Zella said:

I saw a picture (on Pickles, IIRC) of Jill sitting amongst a group of women in skirts (heads cut off) all looking at the same book (not bibles; they had the same cover). It appeared to be at someone's home, although it could have been maybe a large church book store or something. I think that's the extent of her "class."

What scares me about it is the other ladies have just the "textbook" open in their laps and Jill has this big binder.  I hope she isn't "teaching" the class.

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On 10/3/2016 at 4:55 AM, GeeGolly said:

What is the fingerprinting for? I would think all states require a CORI to substitute teach, but it doesn't include fingerprinting. 

I wonder what subject Derick is teaching, and if he is a get called each day kind of sub or long-term. From the hashtag it appears it may have been for just one day.

Maybe its me, but once I had my own place I no longer hung out in my bedroom.

Fingerprinting is so they can do a background check. Criminal record? Sorry, no teaching for you.

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I found the book.  It used to be called Pact Matrimony but now goes by the previous subtitle of This Momentary Marriage.  I ended up finding it by the Spanish version.  Now that I've wasted my Duggar quotient of time for the day, I'll move on.

Edited by Absolom
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I agree that the substitute job seems like a one time emergency thing.  It doesn't sound like he is on a substitute list and on-call every day.  It sounds i as if the death at the school, or whatever it was, resulted in an abnormal number of teachers being unavailable.

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7 minutes ago, Micks Picks said:

I agree that the substitute job seems like a one time emergency thing.  It doesn't sound like he is on a substitute list and on-call every day.  It sounds i as if the death at the school, or whatever it was, resulted in an abnormal number of teachers being unavailable.

That makes a lot of sense. Back when I was in high school the star player on the hockey team got drunk at a party, wandered into the woods in the middle of February and died from hypothermia. A lot of teachers went to the funeral, which was held during the week, and we had a ton of substitutes that day. 

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Meh, I don't see what good an ed degree would do for a one-off substitute who's basically babysitting.  I have a B. S. in Secondary Ed, but if I were asked to teach a high school chemistry class, my education degree wouldn't be worth the paper it was printed on. I'd be fine at following the teacher's instructions for handing out worksheets or administering a test, but if the chem teacher was going to leaving on maternity leave, I'd expect the school to pass me over and to hire a substitute with some chemistry cred.

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Well, seems that Ben and Derick are moving the genetic Duggars up a bit.  Derick has a college degree.  Ben has an Associates and is in some type of college. Bonus that there is a bookshelf in the house with books on it.   Even Nutter Jeremy has a college degree and life experience. 

That's 3 for 3. 

When you look at it that way, I see some positive movement happening. Ok, not much but some.  Let's have a happy moment with SOME.  ;)

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I wonder if Derick was free from his cling along all day wife when he was a substitute? Did she bring him lunch, did she sit outside his classroom, or cry into her root beer because Derick was not by her all day long. When you think about it, being a substitute would be more enjoyable than being around his in-laws for a few hours a day.

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57 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

In might state they do a CORI on all folks who work with and around children. It stands for Criminal Offender Record Information, they don't require fingerprints as well. 

In my district they require finger printing for EVERYONE, including parents chaperoning a field trip.

My school is also always desperate for subs. So if Derrick subbed once, and that district is anything like mine, he'll get called back again. (Although probably later in the school year, when there tends to be more absences.)

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Jill is a slovenly lazy slattern indeed, mwahhhh.

RE is part of our curriculum, you get separated into Catholic, Luthern or Ethics. But then, we don't have such a history as yours, people view Religion as a fairly private matter, although of course, we do have our nationwide religious bank holidays

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On October 2, 2016 at 9:41 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Another middle finger to the internet! Jill writes something she calls a "research" paper. I wonder if she even knows how to structure one. As an accountant, I don't think Derick had to do a lot of writing in college. Well, it's not as if it's for a real school, so maybe they don't care if the paper doesn't have a clear thesis and arguing points. In conclusion, they're slobs. 

Never before, had Derick seen so many red squiggly lines in a one-paragraph document.

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On Tuesday, October 04, 2016 at 11:32 AM, Absolom said:

I found the book.  It used to be called Pact Matrimony but now goes by the previous subtitle of This Momentary Marriage.  I ended up finding it by the Spanish version.  Now that I've wasted my Duggar quotient of time for the day, I'll move on.

Absolom, I took it a step further.  The book is free on PDF.  I was procrastinating work and google just ahold of me.  I'm so ashamed that I wasted even more time on this nonsense. I even skimmed a few chapters. Send Help. 

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Maybe she printed it out for free. That would explain the binder.

5 hours ago, charmed1 said:

Never before, had Derick seen so many red squiggly lines in a one-paragraph document.

How many times were the words "like" (not the simile, but the blank space filler) and "super" used?

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She has paper back copy in her hands though or I could go that way.  Either she's taking this way more seriously than the other ladies or she's leading the group.  Either one is a bit scary.

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Australian children have scripture classes. Volunteers teach it for like one day a week for a single month.  Didn't work on me, it probably doesn't work on many people. I'm not sure on the details, it's a primary school only thing, but everyone got the same generic Western Christianity pedagogy at the uniformly white and lower middle class primary school I attended in Perth. The upscale primary school I attended in Darwin had orthodox Christian children separate from western Christian children for scripture, and there was a third group. Still just volunteers for one day a week for a month.  ??Yuge waste of time☝?. 

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12 minutes ago, Kokapetl said:

Australian children have scripture classes. Volunteers teach it for like one day a week for a single month.  Didn't work on me, it probably doesn't work on many people. I'm not sure on the details, it's a primary school only thing, but everyone got the same generic Western Christianity pedagogy at the uniformly white and lower middle class primary school I attended in Perth. The upscale primary school I attended in Darwin had orthodox Christian children separate from western Christian children for scripture, and there was a third group. Still just volunteers for one day a week for a month.  ??Yuge waste of time☝?. 

I went to 5 different Australian primary schools in 3 different states (we were army kids), and never had a single scripture/religious class, maybe only a Western Australia thing...

Good for Jill if she is learning, even if it's something I find ridiculous. Everyone has to start somewhere, and it's hard at first to study and retain information if it's not something you grew up doing.

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5 minutes ago, kalamac said:

I went to 5 different Australian primary schools in 3 different states (we were army kids), and never had a single scripture/religious class, maybe only a Western Australia thing...

Good for Jill if she is learning, even if it's something I find ridiculous. Everyone has to start somewhere, and it's hard at first to study and retain information if it's not something you grew up doing.

The last year I remember scripture classes was when I was in grade 3, that was in 1991. Things may have changed in the years up until the Howard government in 1996, I doubt anything progressive happened since 1996, and the Abbott government was aggressively retrograde. 

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I finished primary school in '88 so maybe it came after that.

Seeing some of the pictures up thread, chiming in my agreement on how big Izzy is. At least he seems happy and healthy, and yay for Dr. Seuss books. I wonder if he'd be allowed to read them if they knew how liberal and pro-choice Dr. Seuss actually was.

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On 10/2/2016 at 6:41 PM, Sew Sumi said:

Another middle finger to the internet! Jill writes something she calls a "research" paper. I wonder if she even knows how to structure one. As an accountant, I don't think Derick had to do a lot of writing in college. Well, it's not as if it's for a real school, so maybe they don't care if the paper doesn't have a clear thesis and arguing points. In conclusion, they're slobs. 

When I was an undergrad advisor (yes I have done a shitload of various jobs) I was always astounded that these college kids could not write to save their lives.  They would need to petition some transfer work or some other stuff and often I would have to rewrite it because words actually mean something.  They were science majors but still, sentences don't write themselves!

I am calling it.  Her research paper was on being joyfully available combined with how her name looks best.  Jill Duggar Dillard.  Mrs Jill Duggar Dillard.  Mrs Derick Dillard. All with hearts and flowers and arrows.

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22 hours ago, charmed1 said:
On 10/2/2016 at 9:41 PM, Sew Sumi said:

nother middle finger to the internet! Jill writes something she calls a "research" paper. I wonder if she even knows how to structure one. As an accountant, I don't think Derick had to do a lot of writing in college. Well, it's not as if it's for a real school, so maybe they don't care if the paper doesn't have a clear thesis and arguing points. In conclusion, they're slobs. 

Never before, had Derick seen so many red squiggly lines in a one-paragraph document.

Derick reminds me of the time on Big Bang Theory when Penny wrote her paper on Slavery and Leonard was reading it.  Derick is thinking how to fix the paper without hurting Jill's feelings on her paper: Sin=Bad/Jesus=Good.

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