Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[Muffyn]

I found myself thinking, is there a word for the splooge from a sturgeon?  Sturgeon splooge, if you will.  And it came to me, that would be spurgeon.  Thanks, Bin!  Question answered.  

Edited November 12, 2015 by Muffyn

[amitville]

Here's what I wish for BabyBoy Sewald, bottom line:

Spurgeon Elliot (may I call you "sweetheart"?) I wieh you love, security, a happy childhood and adults who will guard and protect you, honor you and LOVE you unconditionally.

If God made you tall or short, blue-eyed or brown, blond or brown-haired, gay or straight........may you find acceptance, understanding and pure love from your mom and dad and extended family.

You have been made in the image of God. You are loved, worthy, accepted and respected.

Beautifully said.  

[Mrs. P.]

I guess this is overstating the obvious, but Eliot is after T.S.Eliot I think. Because Benjermin is such a scholar.

I would bet my last dime that Ben doesn't have a CLUE who T.S. Eliot is.

[ranchgirl]

When Jessa said they were looking for a strong biblical name, I was thinking Sampson, Noah or Moses.

Umm Jessa, Spurgeon isn't a biblical name. 

 

I wonder if Charles Haddon Spurgeon even liked his name. 

 

Nevertheless, they definitely gave this young baby a very strong name.  I'm sure they hope his name inspires him to become a bible explaining missionary.

Glad they are going to call him Quincy. 

[Lemur]

Or

Two former virgins and their virgin son, Spurgeon. With that name, he may be stuck with lifeline virginity.

It's such a goddamned shame Warren Zevon is dead.  He'd have a ball writing a song about these folks. 

[kellylovessnark]

I will call this kid Bam Bam Fishstick Seewald. It's not original on my part, so thanks to those on this thread that thought of it first.

[Satchels of gold]

Well I'm glad I'm not a betting woman because even if you gave me 10,000 chances I never would have guessed that name. I must say it is sheer perfection in its Duggarism. It's like someone took all my thoughts about the Duggars and their belief system and turned it into a name. Viva la Spurgeon!

[Oldernowiser]

Maybe they'll change it once they realize it's absolutely impractical?

I named a puppy "Keeper" once because that's the first thing my husband said when he met him, "He's a keeper."

Great story. TOTALLY impractical name. I couldn't dredge it out of my memory at all under pressure, "No, um, er Bleeper? Beeper? Oh hell, whatever your name is, stop eating the end table!"

Two days later we gave up and named him something we could actually remember.

Edited November 12, 2015 by Oldernowiser

[Teena]

I really, really thought the name was a joke.

 

Baby no. 2---I vote for Sploogin' Duggar Seewald.....

[Defrauder]

Hells Angels or Bikers for Christ?

Catholic Bikers Unanimous.

[JennyMominFL]

Sounds like a porn name. Close to Spooging Seewald

[Celia Rubenstein]

Jessa says everyone still calls him Quincy. Hopefully they all continue to do so.

 

Ordinarily I would be quite peeved to hear someone's family members were refusing to call their baby by his given name because they didn't like it, and instead had elected to go with some nickname.  But in this case, I have to say I don't blame them.  Refusing to call that sweet little baby "Spurgeon" is truly an act of love. 

Edited November 12, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[Churchhoney]

The more I think about this name, the more I wonder whether Bin really is a full-time stoner. Naming your firstborn "Spurgeon" so has that "Heavy, man. That is deep. And profound." ring to it.

[Patricia07]

I wonder if they discussed children's names when they were courting.  

[MarysWetBar]

It's such a goddamned shame Warren Zevon is dead. He'd have a ball writing a song about these folks.

I knew i liked you. A Zevon fan.

[MargeGunderson]

I will be joining you in hell. Want me to save you a seat?

I've got a whole section for us. Look for your name spelled out on your seat in tater tots.

[Oldernowiser]

See, now Zevon Seewald is awesome.

I'm going to call him that.

[HundFan]

I had no clue the word splooge even existed when I chimed in with my personal dictionary's definition of sturge earlier today. Splooge is its perfect audio and imagery companion! All those "sp and spl-starting" words and their friends sort of hinge on onomatopoeia to me anyway and seem to tilt ever so slightly off-color. Spillage, splooge, splat, spit, schtupp, spear, splosion. Do you think Bin subliminally sensed that fact and chose Spurgeon to suggest his volcanic teen-man virility? Wait ... I forgot that Ben, who's as close to a non-thinking, purely limbic being as anything upright can be, isn't yet developed enough to have a subconscious. 

 

BTW, whenever I type in splooge, my computer auto-corrects it to spillage. Don't tell me that the universe (or at least Google) doesn't have a sense of humor!

Edited November 12, 2015 by HundFan

[JoanArc]

http://www.people.com/article/jessa-duggar-talks-first-time-motherhood-ben-seewald-changes-diapers

 

 

While Jessa, 23, is still nursing, she's enlisted a few more reinforcements: Grandma Duggar and sister Jana, 25, have been staying nights so the new parents can sleep – or at least try.

Michelle Bye Felicia'd out of any actual child care. Guess she can't give up nights with Jim Bob (ick) either.

 

 

Admits Jessa, "I thought I'd sleep at night, but I hear [the baby] breathe or something, and I take out a flashlight and shine it on his face to make sure he's okay."

Try a mirror under the nostrils.

 

Fox, off all places, did a Totally Insane Baby Names article. Guess who's mentioned?

 

http://www.foxnews.com/slideshow/entertainment/2015/11/12/totally-insane-star-baby-names/

Edited November 12, 2015 by JoanArc

[HundFan]

http://www.people.com/article/jessa-duggar-talks-first-time-motherhood-ben-seewald-changes-diapers

 

 

I call bullshit on Jessa claiming she hasn't changed a diaper yet (at least since leaving the TTH). I think she changes Ben's diapers all the time.

[BrianJ62]

Catholic Bikers Unanimous.

Maybe the Wal-Mart electric cart gang.

[bigskygirl]

Breaking in to say, what the heck?! Takes out a flashlight and shine it on the baby's face to make sure he is okay. Really, seriously... Words escape me.

 

Darn it. I read the People magazine article. The last sentence slays me. You do not know the responsibility of being a parent until you have a baby. Thanks for the news flash. Sorry, I am in a cranky mood, a little stressed out,  no sisters to help me take care of my two cats while I try to sleep, and my husband is not at home at night to shine a flashlight in my face to make sure I do not stop breathing during the night while I sleep with my CPAP mask on.

[JoanArc]

Breaking in to say, what the heck?! Takes out a flashlight and shine it on the baby's face to make sure he is okay. Really, seriously... Words escape me.

Her heart's in the right place. However that sounds like one of Jessa's spur(geon?) of the moment lies. She doesn't get up at all.

[MargeGunderson]

Why in the world would you shine a flashlight into a sleeping baby's face?!

[BrianJ62]

I call bullshit on Jessa claiming she hasn't changed a diaper yet (at least since leaving the TTH). I think she changes Ben's diapers all the time.

Whose going to change JBobs and MeChelles depends? or the dollar store equivalent.

Breaking in to say, what the heck?! Takes out a flashlight and shine it on the baby's face to make sure he is okay. Really, seriously... Words escape me.

My niece had a baby about a month ago, she put in a baby watching system: video, an alert is sent to her phone if the baby moves, and both Grandmas can watch the baby lve. Talk about big brother.

[Phoenix62.]

Poor child, to be tagged with a name like that.

I feel that a name defines you, and it's pretty darn important that we as parents owe it to our children to give them a name that is strong, a name that they would be proud to have. Somehow I doubt this child will feel proud to carry his name.

I'm guessing he'll be called Eliot.

[barbedwire]

Did MeeShell teach her to shine a light in the baby's face?  Did MeeShell ever get up in the middle of the night with her kids?  Is there a reason Jessa can't change a diaper?  When does Bin go back to "work?"

 

I need answers!

 

;)

[JennyMominFL]

We can just call him Fish. It's good enough for Abe Vigoda

Edited November 12, 2015 by JennyMominFL

[sometimesy]

I had no clue the word splooge even existed when I chimed in with my personal dictionary's definition of sturge earlier today. Splooge is its perfect audio and imagery companion! All those "sp and spl-starting" words and their friends sort of hinge on onomatopoeia to me anyway and seem to tilt ever so slightly off-color. Spillage, splooge, splat, spit, schtupp, spear, splosion. Do you think Bin subliminally sensed that fact and chose Spurgeon to suggest his volcanic teen-man virility? Wait ... I forgot that Ben, who's as close to a non-thinking, purely limbic being as anything upright can be, isn't yet developed enough to have a subconscious. 

 

BTW, whenever I type in splooge, my computer auto-corrects it to spillage. Don't tell me that the universe (or at least Google) doesn't have a sense of humor!

 

splooge! haah I was thinking spooge.. Now that sounds more familiar!

[Albanyguy]

Whose going to change JBobs and MeChelles depends? or the dollar store equivalent.

 

Jana, of course. Who else?

[BrianJ62]

We can just call him Fish. It's good enough for Abe Vigoda

Jonah (and the) Whale Seewald.

Edited November 12, 2015 by BrianJ62

[sometimesy]

We knew the 'Bin is jus' the most specialist papa in the whole entire world, awwww' was coming.

[BrianJ62]

Name DaJour Seewald

[Missy Vixen]

Thanks, PEOPLE Magazine, for proving me right. Of course J-Chelle was at the mold house as long as the TLC cameras were there. When they left, she was out.

 

Perhaps Jessa Blessa could invest some of the money they got from their PEOPLE EXCLUSIVE and buy a baby monitor, unless Bill Gothard thinks they're Satanic.

 

And the baby will be Bam Bam Fish Fry (BBFF for short), at least to me.

[JoanArc]

What gets me is the Quincy story is so cute, organic, and real. If they'd gone with that as a first name it all would've been OK.

 

How many great, godly, people in history were named Jessa? If you want a name that means something, change your own first.

[NewDigs]

Bolding mine

I saw some other young 20-something posting on FB about feeling upset that people don't like the name Spurgeon...because she and her husband have also chosen that name for their child!!

Sounds like a couple the Seewalds should purpose to meet some day.

Sounds kind of like a couple of fake accounts doing damage control.

Spurgeon?

[HundFan]

splooge! haah I was thinking spooge.. Now that sounds more familiar!

 

You had me worried I'd misquoted an earlier poster, so I revisited my last post, then looked up both splooge and spooge (in a real, not-of-my-making dictionary). And here's the god's truth: spooge - (1) semi-liquid gunk, (2) a lubricant used for the assembly of electronic equipment, (3) slang for semen. As opposed to splooge, which is defined simply as "an ejaculatory deposit." Both words work well with Sturge. 

 

Spurgeon is clearly a horrible and hapless insult of a name for that innocent baby, but it's the moniker that'll keep on giving on this board.  No one could even make this shit up!

Edited November 12, 2015 by HundFan

[jschoolgirl]

And you know that no one is ever going to be able to spell it correctly. Watch for the variations we will almost certainly see on social media.

"Sperjun"

"Spurgen"

"Spergin'"

"Spoogin"

Spurgie could be cute for a nickname. Maybe.

[riverblue22]

Over at Pickles they are calling the baby Spud.  I kind of like that.

[sarasue59]

That name is so awful, it is almost a form of child abuse.  Wait a minute, it IS child abuse!  If that poor boy somehow does end up going to public school, with that name, he is going to be teased and beaten down on by all the kids just because his parent were a couple of immature, pinheaded self-centered dumbasses who thought it was a strong, Gawdly name.  I so hope that S. Eliot becomes a Catholic when he grows up.  This would be the ultimate FU to his parents.

[Pixie Chicken]

That name is so awful, it is almost a form of child abuse.  Wait a minute, it IS child abuse!  If that poor boy somehow does end up going to public school, with that name, he is going to be teased and beaten down on by all the kids just because his parent were a couple of immature, pinheaded self-centered dumbasses who thought it was a strong, Gawdly name.  I so hope that S. Eliot becomes a Catholic when he grows up.  This would be the ultimate FU to his parents.

Awful name, to be sure.  But I almost feel like people try to out-weird one another with their names, as though people named "Tom" or "Jane" aren't unique individuals.  I often think that being mocked for having a weird name is unlikely now.  It's more weird to go totally mainstream.

[JoanArc]

 

Robert Duvall, who portrays Capt. Spurgeon 'Fish' Tanner from "Deep Impact"(1998)

*Snort*

[SpottedCoachDog]

Does anybody else remember the guy who named his son Adolph Hitler and ended up (I think) having the child removed by social services? Naming this child after someone who preached the evils of Catholicism isn't much different to me. Hatemonger Seewald would be easier to spell. #Freefishstick

And somebody up thread said they hoped Jessa's blood transfusion came from a lesbian. I'm hoping a Catholic.

[BrianJ62]

Spurgeon the surgeon?

[Muffyn]

Breaking in to say, what the heck?! Takes out a flashlight and shine it on the baby's face to make sure he is okay. Really, seriously... Words escape me.

Poor little Splooge-on.  First, he has that name.  Second, he is going to grow up afraid of lights. if the poor child ever sees a train coming toward him, he'll probably freeze like a deer and hope the scary light goes away.  

 

Whose going to change JBobs and MeChelles depends? or the dollar store equivalent.

Let's hope they don't buy used and save the difference! 

[MonicaM]

Does anybody else remember the guy who named his son Adolph Hitler and ended up (I think) having the child removed by social services? Naming this child after someone who preached the evils of Catholicism isn't much different to me. Hatemonger Seewald would be easier to spell. #Freefishstick

And somebody up thread said they hoped Jessa's blood transfusion came from a lesbian. I'm hoping a Catholic.

 

How about a Catholic lesbian?

[Oldernowiser]

Catholic transgender.

[SongbirdHollow]

Wasn't Spurgeon the name of the snake that tricked Eve in the Garden of Eden?

No, that was Reggie

 

No wait, that was from Raiders of the Lost Ark.

[JenCarroll]

Well, there's a storied tradition of naming a kid when one's primary aim in life is calling attention to oneself (child's entire future be damned): Moon Unit, Dweezil, Apple, Blanket (aka Prince Michael Jackson II), and in the case of the Foremans, George, George, George, etc. In my estimation, Spurgeon is right on a par with Dweezil and Blanket.

 

Dweezil Zappa is on record saying he loves his name.

 

Spurgeon it sounds like something someone would name their pet snake.

  

Not if they liked the snake, surely?

$50 says they are calling that cute kid Bubba by sundown if they haven't started already

 

And that is the beautiful thing about that part of the country -- Bubba is always an option.

 

I agress that Baby Seewald is cute and adorbs. May he be loved unconditionally.

Well, he may be, but on balance I think it's unlikely.

[SongbirdHollow]

My Kindle browser today: Add Spurgeon to the dictionary?

 

Me: <sigh> OK.