Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[Jynnan tonnix]

2 hours ago, BetyBee said:

All of this sharing about less than perfect families makes me feel that I have kindred spirits here! When people go on and on about how loved they are by their parents, on SM and IRL, I sometimes feel a bit less than. I was not beaten, but my parents were in their own world and had more children than they could handle. It was years before I realized that the problems were theirs and it wasn't that I was unlovable. My Dad has been gone for 30 years, but my Mom is much easier to talk to these days, as long as we all gloss over the problems. 😞

For me, making my own adult life with my husband and children (and now grandchildren), has been a second chance at a normal life. We weren't perfect parents, but we did far better than my folks did. Our kids are wonderful people. 

ETA: Husband and children are not necessary for making a normal life. That's just my experience!

It makes me feel more that I am selfish and cold. When I read about other people's horrible experiences with their parents, it brings home to me that my parents definitely always loved me, and did everything they could, but, especially since I ended up being their only child out of three live births (I was one of 2-month premature twins, and they lost a son when I was about four, who was born at about 26 weeks), they did tend toward being very overprotective, and never really being able to cut the apron strings, even after I was married and moving around to various parts of the world with my husband and his Naval career. My father, also, was quite strict, but never more so than when he was trying to tie my soul to my Polish heritage. But, really, aside from their always being the champions of unsolicited advice, the faults in our relationship were probably more due to my having a rebellious nature on the one hand, but being too timid to act on it on the other. I know a lot of people who grew up in a very similar circumstances. Dad was one of the top brass in the country for the Polish Scouting Organization, and I think I was always a disappointment to him, as I'm just not a joiner, and scouting groups were hell for me, whereas most of the children of the other scouting families in our circle went on to be leaders in the PSO, with all those Mega-Catholic, Polish-nationalistic, Scouting-oriented values they tried so hard to instill in me. I was always just so different from them by nature, though, as I came to realize many years later as an adult, I am actually very much like some of my cousins, especially the children of his middle brother, who was always the atheist and the dreamer, even though they were brought up in the same, horribly difficult circumstances during WWII.

Anyway, whatever the reason, I just grew up feeling deeply resentful of them, but I'm also one of those people (as a couple of others have mentioned recently in this latest discussion) of not really being that emotionally tied to people in general. I never had any family other than my parents, and some cousins whom I really had no contact with until I was an adult since they were all in England, and we moved to the USA when I was young. I never made friends easily - would likely have been put somewhere on the autism spectrum as a kid if they even had such a thing in those days. 

So, here I am. I do love my kids, though I probably was not the world's best mom, and Mr, Jyn was a very distant Dad with the first two, and it wasn't until our third child and he totally bonded that he came out of his shell as a parent a bit more. On the whole, though our family has probably a bit of disfunction around the edges, the kids have grown up to be great people. So I guess we didn't do everything wrong. At the very least, I have always made sure that I let them make their own mistakes as they grew more independent, and will definitely stay away from giving them advice they don't ask for. The older two are extremely private people, much like Mr. Jyn, while our youngest (almost 30 now), will open up a bit more about his feelings, and is definitely in touch with his emotions in a way the other two are not.

But what I started out to say is that of all the people in the world, aside from, mostly, my kids, and maybe one or two other people (whom I hesitate to count as I see and/or talk to them so rarely that it generally seems I don't really know them as much as I know a version of them that lives in my head) I don't actually love anyone, and don't feel as though I could love anyone who ever made me feel resentful toward them. I just build these walls, and there they stay, which is horrible, but I also feel that trying to break through them would somehow vindicate those whom I resent, and I can't bring myself to even try. I guess I'm just a messed up puppy.

Also...total change of subject...I could use all the good vibes I can get for younger son who is finally (FINALLY!) getting word on what the powers that be have decided on the DUI he got when he was here for Christmas (some of you might remember the incident). It seems that he has been recommended for judicial separation from the Marine Corps, even though he has totally done everything right since then, including self-reporting the incident to begin with, as it would likely have gone under the radar indefinitely, having happened out-of-state and the charges being dropped after he went to court. His old CO and old XO/new CO (same person, promoted),  both of whom have worked with him since (they are not really moving people around due to COVID, and his old CO retiring was the only reason for the change-up) both think he is an exemplary officer, and have fought hard for him. He actually has been doing his old XO's job for the past few months, even though it's above his pay grade, because he is so familiar with the job, and, frankly, so good at it. He's been doing a lot of public service, and talks on the importance of responsible drinking/other safety issues. He's got something like 10 days to put together a defense package before the appeal goes further. From everything he's heard, similar cases have quite often been dropped, but for some reason, the current 2-star general in charge has begun to be extra strict in recommending termination.  The case will likely end up going all the way up to the secretary of the Navy. So keep all your fingers crossed. If anyone deserves that second chance, it's my son.

Edited July 22, 2020 by Jynnan tonnix

[Hangin Out]

4 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

@magpye29, I'm so sorry you endured so much trauma in your childhood. It seems most of us here are wounded souls. Even with adulthood struggles it shows how strong and resilient everyone who posts here is.

Warm, fuzzy and healing hugs to anyone who needs them. 

I didn’t have it easy as a kid, hit by belts, hangers, straps, kneeled on rice ( that’s a good one) under the age of ten, but always figured my mother had to work and was tired, BUT NOTHING compared to the trauma of your dear brother.  You’ve had to carry that burden in your heart all these years, and I just can’t imagine as that is the worst one ever heard.  I am so, so sorry @MAGPYE29.

 

 

 

 

[SunnyBeBe]

All of the things that have been mentioned here, as well as other things I have seen in life, have caused me to be very proactive in stopping child abuse/neglect.  A child's welfare is everyone's business.  

Edited July 22, 2020 by SunnyBeBe

[Hangin Out]

On 7/20/2020 at 9:45 PM, Scarlett45 said:

Sex? What’s that?? I’ve forgotten. Damn COVID-19😒. 
 

I was watching P-Valley on Starz and there was a hot naked man and I almost fainted. 😹

Sex?  What’s that is right.  I’m older, and married a long time.  When a man gets to be a certain age, no more sex.  You’re lucky if you get a hello when passing, lol.  In their younger years, they were all over you and couldn’t get enough.  Now, they watch sports or the news.  Romance is gone .. they’ve had enough.  Women need more of everything no matter the age.  Why don’t they know that?  I’m so happy I could spit this crap out.

[Hangin Out]

2 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

It makes me feel more that I am selfish and cold. When I read about other people's horrible experiences with their parents, it brings home to me that my parents definitely always loved me, and did everything they could, but, especially since I ended up being their only child out of three live births (I was one of 2-month premature twins, and they lost a son when I was about four, who was born at about 26 weeks), they did tend toward being very overprotective, and never really being able to cut the apron strings, even after I was married and moving around to various parts of the world with my husband and his Naval career. My father, also, was quite strict, but never more so than when he was trying to tie my soul to my Polish heritage. But, really, aside from their always being the champions of unsolicited advice, the faults in our relationship were probably more due to my having a rebellious nature on the one hand, but being too timid to act on it on the other. I know a lot of people who grew up in a very similar circumstances. Dad was one of the top brass in the country for the Polish Scouting Organization, and I think I was always a disappointment to him, as I'm just not a joiner, and scouting groups were hell for me, whereas most of the children of the other scouting families in our circle went on to be leaders in the PSO, with all those Mega-Catholic, Polish-nationalistic, Scouting-oriented values they tried so hard to instill in me. I was always just so different from them by nature, though, as I came to realize many years later as an adult, I am actually very much like some of my cousins, especially the children of his middle brother, who was always the atheist and the dreamer, even though they were brought up in the same, horribly difficult circumstances during WWII.

Anyway, whatever the reason, I just grew up feeling deeply resentful of them, but I'm also one of those people (as a couple of others have mentioned recently in this latest discussion) of not really being that emotionally tied to people in general. I never had any family other than my parents, and some cousins whom I really had no contact with until I was an adult since they were all in England, and we moved to the USA when I was young. I never made friends easily - would likely have been put somewhere on the autism spectrum as a kid if they even had such a thing in those days. 

So, here I am. I do love my kids, though I probably was not the world's best mom, and Mr, Jyn was a very distant Dad with the first two, and it wasn't until our third child and he totally bonded that he came out of his shell as a parent a bit more. On the whole, though our family has probably a bit of disfunction around the edges, the kids have grown up to be great people. So I guess we didn't do everything wrong. At the very least, I have always made sure that I let them make their own mistakes as they grew more independent, and will definitely stay away from giving them advice they don't ask for. The older two are extremely private people, much like Mr. Jyn, while our youngest (almost 30 now), will open up a bit more about his feelings, and is definitely in touch with his emotions in a way the other two are not.

But what I started out to say is that of all the people in the world, aside from, mostly, my kids, and maybe one or two other people (whom I hesitate to count as I see and/or talk to them so rarely that it generally seems I don't really know them as much as I know a version of them that lives in my head) I don't actually love anyone, and don't feel as though I could love anyone who ever made me feel resentful toward them. I just build these walls, and there they stay, which is horrible, but I also feel that trying to break through them would somehow vindicate those whom I resent, and I can't bring myself to even try. I guess I'm just a messed up puppy.

Also...total change of subject...I could use all the good vibes I can get for younger son who is finally (FINALLY!) getting word on what the powers that be have decided on the DUI he got when he was here for Christmas (some of you might remember the incident). It seems that he has been recommended for judicial separation from the Marine Corps, even though he has totally done everything right since then, including self-reporting the incident to begin with, as it would likely have gone under the radar indefinitely, having happened out-of-state and the charges being dropped after he went to court. His old CO and old XO/new CO (same person, promoted),  both of whom have worked with him since (they are not really moving people around due to COVID, and his old CO retiring was the only reason for the change-up) both think he is an exemplary officer, and have fought hard for him. He actually has been doing his old XO's job for the past few months, even though it's above his pay grade, because he is so familiar with the job, and, frankly, so good at it. He's been doing a lot of public service, and talks on the importance of responsible drinking/other safety issues. He's got something like 10 days to put together a defense package before the appeal goes further. From everything he's heard, similar cases have quite often been dropped, but for some reason, the current 2-star general in charge has begun to be extra strict in recommending termination.  The case will likely end up going all the way up to the secretary of the Navy. So keep all your fingers crossed. If anyone deserves that second chance, it's my son.

Heritage plays a lot in how we are.  My both parents came from Poland, grew up with Soldiers marching thru their houses.  They were matched for marriage in NewYork where they started their lives.  No love there, just respect.  Both worked all their lives.  They never used the word love, but raised us strick the best they could.  We had the basics, but nothing fancy, and no”I love yous”.  I’m different with my kids.  I cant say I love you enough or hug them enough, even tho they are now married and have kids of their own.

[Suzn]

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

It makes me feel more that I am selfish and cold. When I read about other people's horrible experiences with their parents, it brings home to me that my parents definitely always loved me, and did everything they could, but, especially since I ended up being their only child out of three live births (I was one of 2-month premature twins, and they lost a son when I was about four, who was born at about 26 weeks), they did tend toward being very overprotective, and never really being able to cut the apron strings, even after I was married and moving around to various parts of the world with my husband and his Naval career. My father, also, was quite strict, but never more so than when he was trying to tie my soul to my Polish heritage. But, really, aside from their always being the champions of unsolicited advice, the faults in our relationship were probably more due to my having a rebellious nature on the one hand, but being too timid to act on it on the other. I know a lot of people who grew up in a very similar circumstances. Dad was one of the top brass in the country for the Polish Scouting Organization, and I think I was always a disappointment to him, as I'm just not a joiner, and scouting groups were hell for me, whereas most of the children of the other scouting families in our circle went on to be leaders in the PSO, with all those Mega-Catholic, Polish-nationalistic, Scouting-oriented values they tried so hard to instill in me. I was always just so different from them by nature, though, as I came to realize many years later as an adult, I am actually very much like some of my cousins, especially the children of his middle brother, who was always the atheist and the dreamer, even though they were brought up in the same, horribly difficult circumstances during WWII.

Anyway, whatever the reason, I just grew up feeling deeply resentful of them, but I'm also one of those people (as a couple of others have mentioned recently in this latest discussion) of not really being that emotionally tied to people in general. I never had any family other than my parents, and some cousins whom I really had no contact with until I was an adult since they were all in England, and we moved to the USA when I was young. I never made friends easily - would likely have been put somewhere on the autism spectrum as a kid if they even had such a thing in those days. 

So, here I am. I do love my kids, though I probably was not the world's best mom, and Mr, Jyn was a very distant Dad with the first two, and it wasn't until our third child and he totally bonded that he came out of his shell as a parent a bit more. On the whole, though our family has probably a bit of disfunction around the edges, the kids have grown up to be great people. So I guess we didn't do everything wrong. At the very least, I have always made sure that I let them make their own mistakes as they grew more independent, and will definitely stay away from giving them advice they don't ask for. The older two are extremely private people, much like Mr. Jyn, while our youngest (almost 30 now), will open up a bit more about his feelings, and is definitely in touch with his emotions in a way the other two are not.

But what I started out to say is that of all the people in the world, aside from, mostly, my kids, and maybe one or two other people (whom I hesitate to count as I see and/or talk to them so rarely that it generally seems I don't really know them as much as I know a version of them that lives in my head) I don't actually love anyone, and don't feel as though I could love anyone who ever made me feel resentful toward them. I just build these walls, and there they stay, which is horrible, but I also feel that trying to break through them would somehow vindicate those whom I resent, and I can't bring myself to even try. I guess I'm just a messed up puppy.

Also...total change of subject...I could use all the good vibes I can get for younger son who is finally (FINALLY!) getting word on what the powers that be have decided on the DUI he got when he was here for Christmas (some of you might remember the incident). It seems that he has been recommended for judicial separation from the Marine Corps, even though he has totally done everything right since then, including self-reporting the incident to begin with, as it would likely have gone under the radar indefinitely, having happened out-of-state and the charges being dropped after he went to court. His old CO and old XO/new CO (same person, promoted),  both of whom have worked with him since (they are not really moving people around due to COVID, and his old CO retiring was the only reason for the change-up) both think he is an exemplary officer, and have fought hard for him. He actually has been doing his old XO's job for the past few months, even though it's above his pay grade, because he is so familiar with the job, and, frankly, so good at it. He's been doing a lot of public service, and talks on the importance of responsible drinking/other safety issues. He's got something like 10 days to put together a defense package before the appeal goes further. From everything he's heard, similar cases have quite often been dropped, but for some reason, the current 2-star general in charge has begun to be extra strict in recommending termination.  The case will likely end up going all the way up to the secretary of the Navy. So keep all your fingers crossed. If anyone deserves that second chance, it's my son.

I think you are far more normal than you view yourself.  I've read many things you've posted and you always seem so hard on yourself.  You don't need to love anyone you don't already love, except yourself.

I hope your son is given the break he deserves.  It would be a shame that one moment of bad judgement should cost his career.

[BetyBee]

2 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

It makes me feel more that I am selfish and cold. When I read about other people's horrible experiences with their parents, it brings home to me that my parents definitely always loved me, and did everything they could, but, especially since I ended up being their only child out of three live births (I was one of 2-month premature twins, and they lost a son when I was about four, who was born at about 26 weeks), they did tend toward being very overprotective, and never really being able to cut the apron strings, even after I was married and moving around to various parts of the world with my husband and his Naval career. My father, also, was quite strict, but never more so than when he was trying to tie my soul to my Polish heritage. But, really, aside from their always being the champions of unsolicited advice, the faults in our relationship were probably more due to my having a rebellious nature on the one hand, but being too timid to act on it on the other. I know a lot of people who grew up in a very similar circumstances. Dad was one of the top brass in the country for the Polish Scouting Organization, and I think I was always a disappointment to him, as I'm just not a joiner, and scouting groups were hell for me, whereas most of the children of the other scouting families in our circle went on to be leaders in the PSO, with all those Mega-Catholic, Polish-nationalistic, Scouting-oriented values they tried so hard to instill in me. I was always just so different from them by nature, though, as I came to realize many years later as an adult, I am actually very much like some of my cousins, especially the children of his middle brother, who was always the atheist and the dreamer, even though they were brought up in the same, horribly difficult circumstances during WWII.

Anyway, whatever the reason, I just grew up feeling deeply resentful of them, but I'm also one of those people (as a couple of others have mentioned recently in this latest discussion) of not really being that emotionally tied to people in general. I never had any family other than my parents, and some cousins whom I really had no contact with until I was an adult since they were all in England, and we moved to the USA when I was young. I never made friends easily - would likely have been put somewhere on the autism spectrum as a kid if they even had such a thing in those days. 

So, here I am. I do love my kids, though I probably was not the world's best mom, and Mr, Jyn was a very distant Dad with the first two, and it wasn't until our third child and he totally bonded that he came out of his shell as a parent a bit more. On the whole, though our family has probably a bit of disfunction around the edges, the kids have grown up to be great people. So I guess we didn't do everything wrong. At the very least, I have always made sure that I let them make their own mistakes as they grew more independent, and will definitely stay away from giving them advice they don't ask for. The older two are extremely private people, much like Mr. Jyn, while our youngest (almost 30 now), will open up a bit more about his feelings, and is definitely in touch with his emotions in a way the other two are not.

But what I started out to say is that of all the people in the world, aside from, mostly, my kids, and maybe one or two other people (whom I hesitate to count as I see and/or talk to them so rarely that it generally seems I don't really know them as much as I know a version of them that lives in my head) I don't actually love anyone, and don't feel as though I could love anyone who ever made me feel resentful toward them. I just build these walls, and there they stay, which is horrible, but I also feel that trying to break through them would somehow vindicate those whom I resent, and I can't bring myself to even try. I guess I'm just a messed up puppy.

Also...total change of subject...I could use all the good vibes I can get for younger son who is finally (FINALLY!) getting word on what the powers that be have decided on the DUI he got when he was here for Christmas (some of you might remember the incident). It seems that he has been recommended for judicial separation from the Marine Corps, even though he has totally done everything right since then, including self-reporting the incident to begin with, as it would likely have gone under the radar indefinitely, having happened out-of-state and the charges being dropped after he went to court. His old CO and old XO/new CO (same person, promoted),  both of whom have worked with him since (they are not really moving people around due to COVID, and his old CO retiring was the only reason for the change-up) both think he is an exemplary officer, and have fought hard for him. He actually has been doing his old XO's job for the past few months, even though it's above his pay grade, because he is so familiar with the job, and, frankly, so good at it. He's been doing a lot of public service, and talks on the importance of responsible drinking/other safety issues. He's got something like 10 days to put together a defense package before the appeal goes further. From everything he's heard, similar cases have quite often been dropped, but for some reason, the current 2-star general in charge has begun to be extra strict in recommending termination.  The case will likely end up going all the way up to the secretary of the Navy. So keep all your fingers crossed. If anyone deserves that second chance, it's my son.

@Jynnan tonnix - I can relate to what you're saying about not loving a lot of people. I get along with people and I don't mind being around them for chit chat,  but my husband and I don't have a lot of close friends I love my sibs and my Mom, though I think I might have fit better into a smaller family. My younger sister is my best friend. I think it's great that you have a rebellious nature! We don't have to love activities that our parents want us to love and the best part of being grown ups is getting to do what we want! 

I have fingers crossed that the situation goes well for your son. It would be foolish for the Navy to let him go when he is clearly a wonderful asset. Please keep us posted on the outcome!

[lookeyloo]

1 hour ago, Silver Bells said:

Sex?  What’s that is right.  I’m older, and married a long time.  When a man gets to be a certain age, no more sex.  You’re lucky if you get a hello when passing, lol.  In their younger years, they were all over you and couldn’t get enough.  Now, they watch sports or the news.  Romance is gone .. they’ve had enough.  Women need more of everything no matter the age.  Why don’t they know that?  I’m so happy I could spit this crap out.

I’m sorry to hear. That is not always the case. 

[Hangin Out]

1 hour ago, lookeyloo said:

I’m sorry to hear. That is not always the case. 

Yes,I know that.  Plus every person and every senerio is different .. example, certain health issues.
 

 

 

[PikaScrewChu]

I am counting down the days until I get my new nightguard.

Never thought that would make me happy...

[galaxychaser]

I got beat probably every day until I got oh probably 11 or so and got big enough to threaten violence back. I don’t think kids need to be hit at all . Ever. Beating up a toddler isn’t teaching them discipline. I’m still bitter about that. 
 

My cousin is a pure sadist. He is  8 years older than me. his biggest fun was beating on his 3 female cousins. He threw me head first into a wall when I was 6-7. Had a nice concussion from that. I hate him to this day. 
 

 

Edited July 23, 2020 by galaxychaser

[doodlebug]

Not to change the subject, but we were talking about gladiolas and how nice they look in late summer.  Here's a current photo of them in my front yard.  I've got several colors planted.  The pink ones bloom first and then are replaced by yellow, red and purple in turn.  They look terrific when cut and placed in a tall vase.

 

[SunnyBeBe]

5 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Not to change the subject, but we were talking about gladiolas and how nice they look in late summer.  Here's a current photo of them in my front yard.  I've got several colors planted.  The pink ones bloom first and then are replaced by yellow, red and purple in turn.  They look terrific when cut and placed in a tall vase.

 

They sure are lovely.  My grandmother used to have them in her yard and they were her favorite.  I never see them that I don't think of her.  

[Nysha]

7 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

But, really, aside from their always being the champions of unsolicited advice, the faults in our relationship were probably more due to my having a rebellious nature on the one hand, but being too timid to act on it on the other. 

I think it was probably less having a rebellious nature and more being made to feel like you were bad for being who you are (a thinker, not a joiner) and being forced to participate in things you were uncomfortable with. They were not abusive, but your psyche still bears the scars of not being acceptable to the two people who were supposed to love you unconditionally. 

I'm sorry your son is still having issues over his DUI. I really hope this can be worked out so one mistake doesn't torpedo his entire career.

 

[magpye29]

@doodlebug, your glads are so pretty! I come from farmers on both sides of the tree, but plants shudder in terror when they see me because I am a serial killer of their kind!

@Jynnan tonnix, you are so hard on yourself! It can't have been easy for you to have been the focus of all your parents' love--I feel like that could have been so suffocating. I don't know your Meyers-Briggs type, but it sounds like you were an ISTJ raised by ENFPs, and I know from parenting my own child that my dramatic, flamboyant personality and love of glitter has been very difficult for my daughter, who is kind of appalled and embarrassed by me. At least we can talk about it.

I'll keep your son in my prayers. All it takes is one person to make a stink about something. Hopefully the 2-star will make the right call.

@galaxychaser, no child should ever be hit, EVER. I find it so bizarre that people use their sorry childhoods as an excuse for hitting their kids. I NEVER wanted to lay a hand on my kids because I know how lousy that is. As for your rat-bastard cousin, I have no words but cuss words.

@SunnyBeBe, we need more warriors like you in the world! Keep fighting the good fight. We need to stop believing that biology trumps everything. When we take children out of abusive homes, we should stop giving them back to the same animals who savaged them!

@Silver Bells, never had to kneel on rice, but I did have to kneel directly on my knees (keeping my lower legs in the air) with my forehead resting on the radiator and my hands folded behind my back. My mother's younger brother used to babysit us, and he would devise the most gruesome punishments for us. He had a book about medieval tortures that he liked to bring with him when he came over. I read the whole thing--it gave me nightmares! Were your coat hangers just regular, or did your parents do what mine did and stretch them out into a switch? They leave a hell of a welt!

I have to stop--I feel like Richard Dreyfus and Robert Shaw in  Jaws, which I'm going to see next week at a local food drive in. The movie is free, but no outside food allowed. I'm planning to go early and bring my book with me so I can read until the movie starts.

 

26 minutes ago, Nysha said:

I really hope this can be worked out so one mistake doesn't torpedo his entire career.

 

You said torpedo. That made me laugh and laugh! Apologies to @Jynnan tonnix, but that's some pretty clever wording right there!

[jcbrown]

56 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Not to change the subject, but we were talking about gladiolas and how nice they look in late summer.  Here's a current photo of them in my front yard.  I've got several colors planted.  The pink ones bloom first and then are replaced by yellow, red and purple in turn.  They look terrific when cut and placed in a tall vase.

 

I love them, too, and yours are so pretty. I have two pitchers, one pale blue with a light green edge and one orange with a yellow edge and I love to fill them with different colored glads and arrange them next to each other.

[Scarlett45]

2 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Not to change the subject, but we were talking about gladiolas and how nice they look in late summer.  Here's a current photo of them in my front yard.  I've got several colors planted.  The pink ones bloom first and then are replaced by yellow, red and purple in turn.  They look terrific when cut and placed in a tall vase.

 

These are gorgeous!

[latetotheparty]

On 7/20/2020 at 7:51 PM, MargeGunderson said:

I’m just going to trust you on this one, @lookeyloo! I have no need to verify for myself. 

I’m treating myself to a lot of new skincare products as a reward for...well, basically just getting up everyday and doing what needs to be done at work and home. Face masks, body scrubs, lotions, foot masks (I love a good foot mask), hair products, etc. It’s kind of a shame, my skin looks terrific, and I have no where to show it off. I’ve never been so well hydrated. 

The only thing that gives me a post exercise high is lap swimming. Sadly, pools are closed right now. 

[latetotheparty]

On 7/20/2020 at 9:52 PM, magpye29 said:

I'm a big fan of Archway Windmill cookies--has to be Archway, because the other brands just don't taste as good.  

Grandma cookies! Just opening a packages brings all the smells of her house. 

[Hangin Out]

4 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

I got beat probably every day until I got oh probably 11 or so and got big enough to threaten violence back. I don’t think kids need to be hit at all . Ever. Beating up a toddler isn’t teaching them discipline. I’m still bitter about that. 
 

My cousin is a pure sadist 8 years older his biggest fun was beating on his 3 female cousins. He threw me head first into a wall when I was 6-7. Had a nice concussion from that. I hate him to this day. 
 

 

A concussion.  Unreal.  I don’t blame you.  Was he punished at the time?

[andromeda331]

6 hours ago, doodlebug said:

Not to change the subject, but we were talking about gladiolas and how nice they look in late summer.  Here's a current photo of them in my front yard.  I've got several colors planted.  The pink ones bloom first and then are replaced by yellow, red and purple in turn.  They look terrific when cut and placed in a tall vase.

 

Those are beautiful!

[galaxychaser]

When I meet people I always assume they don’t have a father. And am legit shocked to find out that they do! Thanks for nothing sperm donor. 

[galaxychaser]

9 hours ago, Silver Bells said:

A concussion.  Unreal.  I don’t blame you.  Was he punished at the time?

He got beat up SEVERELY by my mom. My punishment was I had SEVERE migraines for a few years after the concussion. I used to pass out from the pain in school or home. I thought I had brain cancer.

[Hangin Out]

1 minute ago, galaxychaser said:

He got beat up SEVERELY by my mom. My punishment was I had SEVERE migraines for a few years after the concussion. I used to pass out from the pain in school or home. I thought I had brain cancer.

The problem wasn’t us little girls, it was the people who used physical abuse to release their tensions of life I guess.  All I know is that I must have been depressed, as I used to go to bed very early just to end the day, and that was in first grade.  Anyhow, the day I met my husband, my life changed for the better, and I learned to appreciate and enjoy my kids and now my grandchildren.  I’m sure people have worse.  Isn’t it amazing how we remember every lousy little detail when we were so little?

[Marshmallow Mollie]

One thing I appreciate about difficult childhood is that I am very independent. That has served me well professionally and personally.

[Ohiopirate02]

12 hours ago, JoanArc said:

I have to share a story about the first time I saw this movie.  It was the summer of 1989 and my oldest cousin on my mom's side of the family was getting married in St. Louis.  That side of my family is spread out around the country and we only  all get together for weddings and funerals.  We were all staying in the same hotel when one night the adults decided that they wanted a kids free night.  So they left Grandma in charge of all of us kids and someone splurged to get us a movie on pay-per-view.  This was the movie chosen.  Grandma got to this scene and just lost it.  She tried to feign righteous indignation that this movie was not appropriate for kids, but she could not stop laughing.  

[galaxychaser]

24 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

I have to share a story about the first time I saw this movie.  It was the summer of 1989 and my oldest cousin on my mom's side of the family was getting married in St. Louis.  That side of my family is spread out around the country and we only  all get together for weddings and funerals.  We were all staying in the same hotel when one night the adults decided that they wanted a kids free night.  So they left Grandma in charge of all of us kids and someone splurged to get us a movie on pay-per-view.  This was the movie chosen.  Grandma got to this scene and just lost it.  She tried to feign righteous indignation that this movie was not appropriate for kids, but she could not stop laughing.  

What is that movie called? 

[Ohiopirate02]

5 minutes ago, galaxychaser said:

What is that movie called? 

It's The Naked Gun.

[doodlebug]

1 minute ago, galaxychaser said:

What is that movie called? 

The actors in that scene are Leslie Nielsen and Priscilla Presley (AKA Elvis' ex).  It also stars OJ Simpson, before he killed his ex-wife and her friend in cold blood.

Stupidly funny, escapist film.  Highly recommended for COVID stress relief.

[Zella]

I love The Naked Gun! So many great scenes but my favorite is this one:

 

[zoomama]

friends, this is a BIG change from our usual conversation and maybe not even ok to share but i have to tell you our good news!    my very talented nephew Joey Hendricks is signed by Sony Music Nashville and is releasing his first single tomorrow!!!!   see attached story and photo.   please help me out. if you are on spotify premium or apple music , please take a moment to listen. this is going to be his big break and every hit counts with his recording company. and would you also share this link on your social media. we need to get him known out there. 

https://musicrow.com/2020/07/sony-music-nashville-signs-joey-hendricks/?fbclid=IwAR1Fg2LX0wMVg9tQW49hFhkJVh9tiHFAteIJXzCuG9NuCzTnr1XTWxhbvbY

[latetotheparty]

4 hours ago, doodlebug said:

The actors in that scene are Leslie Nielsen and Priscilla Presley (AKA Elvis' ex).  It also stars OJ Simpson, before he killed his ex-wife and her friend in cold blood.

Stupidly funny, escapist film.  Highly recommended for COVID stress relief.

I love love love Leslie Nielsen, especially in due South. 

[Mindthinkr]

Sorry, but I’m backtracking to my grandson at the fishing camp. He did test positive for Covid. My daughter negative. She can go back to work (per health dept) on the 3rd. His sister with breathing issues is isolating in her room, the grandson in his and as if they weren’t bored before being forced to stay in their own rooms for the rest of the family’s sake. Urgh. 

[Ijustwantsomechips]

The Naked Gun trilogy was on a few weeks ago. I watched it and laughed like I’d never seen the movies before. Whenever Nordberg gets stuck under that bus I lose it. 

Edited July 24, 2020 by Ijustwantsomechips

[Nysha]

6 hours ago, zoomama said:

friends, this is a BIG change from our usual conversation and maybe not even ok to share but i have to tell you our good news!    my very talented nephew Joey Hendricks is signed by Sony Music Nashville and is releasing his first single tomorrow!!!!   see attached story and photo.   please help me out. if you are on spotify premium or apple music , please take a moment to listen. this is going to be his big break and every hit counts with his recording company. and would you also share this link on your social media. we need to get him known out there. 

https://musicrow.com/2020/07/sony-music-nashville-signs-joey-hendricks/?fbclid=IwAR1Fg2LX0wMVg9tQW49hFhkJVh9tiHFAteIJXzCuG9NuCzTnr1XTWxhbvbY

Wow! Good news is always welcome. I hope your nephew hits it big.

 

 

[BetyBee]

3 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

Sorry, but I’m backtracking to my grandson at the fishing camp. He did test positive for Covid. My daughter negative. She can go back to work (per health dept) on the 3rd. His sister with breathing issues is isolating in her room, the grandson in his and as if they weren’t bored before being forced to stay in their own rooms for the rest of the family’s sake. Urgh. 

@Mindthinkr, I'm so sorry to hear this 😟 I hope everyone stays healthy. Maybe you could order some good books or something to cheer them up? 

[Scarlett45]

3 hours ago, Mindthinkr said:

Sorry, but I’m backtracking to my grandson at the fishing camp. He did test positive for Covid. My daughter negative. She can go back to work (per health dept) on the 3rd. His sister with breathing issues is isolating in her room, the grandson in his and as if they weren’t bored before being forced to stay in their own rooms for the rest of the family’s sake. Urgh. 

Oh no I’m so sorry. How’s he feeling? Poor kids. 
 

I just cancelled my Walt Disney World trip for September. When we first went into lockdown I had hope things would be okay, but I’m not going this year. No judgement on anyone that decides to go, but I won’t be doing it. Walt Disney World is my most absolute FAVORITE place in the entire world. I didn’t ask for my money back I just moved my reservation to September 2021. 

[magpye29]

@zoomama, I shared your link on my facebook--I have over 1500 friends from all my gaming. I will put it on my two gaming only accounts as well. I share your hopes and dreams for your nephew, because I have similar for my son. If it's not against the rules, I will share the video of my son's original song, Empty Room Blues, which he wrote about how it feels to be on stage pouring your heart out when most of the guests aren't even listening.

[Sew Sumi]

My difficult MIL has become Jill Rod. She sent a note to my aunt that she is immune from the virus because she is a baptized Christian. I'm glad she's tucked away in her senior living apartment. Management there isn't playing. They'll keep her safe in spite of herself. 

Edited July 24, 2020 by Sew Sumi

[fonfereksglen]

Today,  I went to the farm roadside stand and bought our first sweet corn of the season!  As well as fresh green beans.   Sometimes, in the worst of times, life can be good.  Though what a strange world where even outside I wore a mask and the longtime attendant wore a large plastic face mask. 😑

We don't eat the corn off the cob anymore, but I prefer to saute a shallot in butter, season with salt and pepper and then then add the corn cut off the cob.  Along with the balsamic burgers with fresh basil from my aero garden and cherry tomatoes from a pot from outside our back door,  it was as close to farm to table as possible.  Midsummer at its best.

Edited July 24, 2020 by fonfereksglen

[Mindthinkr]

1 hour ago, Scarlett45 said:

How’s he feeling?

Normal...which means full of energy as any active kid 12 years old would be. They have a little bit of land and animals. He can go out and ride his dirt bike or build a fort in the woods (in view of the house) when he really feels caged. Other than that he is doing Kahn Academy (check it out. Free quality education) or playing video games. We pray he just doesn’t all of a sudden take a turn for the worse. 

[SunnyBeBe]

12 hours ago, fonfereksglen said:

Today,  I went to the farm roadside stand and bought our first sweet corn of the season!  As well as fresh green beans.   Sometimes, in the worst of times, life can be good.  Though what a strange world where even outside I wore a mask and the longtime attendant wore a large plastic face mask. 😑

We don't eat the corn off the cob anymore, but I prefer to saute a shallot in butter, season with salt and pepper and then then add the corn cut off the cob.  Along with the balsamic burgers with fresh basil from my aero garden and cherry tomatoes from a pot from outside our back door,  it was as close to farm to table as possible.  Midsummer at its best.

That menu is awesome for sure! YUM!  I don't eat corn on the cob, due to my veneers, so, this is perfect.  

Great news to report from my way.  My Covid-19 test was negative! Yaay.  And, my colonoscopy went off without a hitch. (Except for a few attempts to get a vein for my IV, but, that's nothing.) It was really quite pleasant. I got a nice little nap, I am told. I have no memory. The nurse said they gave me hardly any medication!  Prep was not bad either. It was not intense for me, like I've heard from some. My biggest issue was how hungry I was all day. lol  GREAT results, no polyps, so, no return for 10 years!  

On a sad note, my dad lost his sister this week.  We're watching the service online. Daddy's not able to travel there. She had a number of health issues, maintained her mobility, even on oxygen,  had great sense of humor and was ready to go.  She sensed it.  She missed her beloved husband who had gone on before so much.  Asked her children to come visit and within days went peacefully at age 84.  

Edited July 24, 2020 by SunnyBeBe

[Scarlett45]

18 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

That menu is awesome for sure! YUM!  I don't eat corn on the cob, due to my veneers, so, this is perfect.  

Great news to report from my way.  My Covid-19 test was negative! Yaay.  And, my colonoscopy went off without a hitch. (Except for a few attempts to get a vein for my IV, but, that's nothing.) It was really quite pleasant. I got a nice little nap, I am told. I have no memory. The nurse said they gave me hardly any medication!  Prep was not bad either. It was not intense for me, like I've heard from some. My biggest issue was how hungry I was all day. lol  GREAT results, no polyps, so, no return for 10 years!  

On a sad note, my dad lost his sister this week.  We're watching the service online. Daddy's not able to travel there. She had a number of health issues, maintained her mobility, even on oxygen,  had great sense of humor and was ready to go.  She sensed it.  She missed her beloved husband who had gone on before so much.  Asked her children to come visit and within days went peacefully at age 84.  

Yay for your colonoscopy going well. 
 

Im sorry you’ve lost your Aunt. Sounds like she lived a full life. (((Hugs)))

[doodlebug]

14 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Oh no I’m so sorry. How’s he feeling? Poor kids. 
 

I just cancelled my Walt Disney World trip for September. When we first went into lockdown I had hope things would be okay, but I’m not going this year. No judgement on anyone that decides to go, but I won’t be doing it. Walt Disney World is my most absolute FAVORITE place in the entire world. I didn’t ask for my money back I just moved my reservation to September 2021. 

I had a trip planned for May, WDW is also my favoritest.  They obviously refunded my money, and offered huge discounts to move the trip to late summer/early fall.  It was painful, but I declined.  This will be the first time in 5 years I haven't made at least one trip to The Happiest Place on Earth.  I'm with you, it just isn't worth it for me.

A friend of mine, also a Disney freak, also an MD, was actually down there the weekend before the park closed in March, one of her kids was in a band competition or something.  They stayed the whole weekend and she said it was terrific, almost no one in the parks, virtually no lines for anything.  None of them got sick, but I'm not so sure I could've done it.

[Scarlett45]

1 minute ago, doodlebug said:

I had a trip planned for May, WDW is also my favoritest.  They obviously refunded my money, and offered huge discounts to move the trip to late summer/early fall.  It was painful, but I declined.  This will be the first time in 5 years I haven't made at least one trip to The Happiest Place on Earth.  I'm with you, it just isn't worth it for me.

A friend of mine, also a Disney freak, also an MD, was actually down there the weekend before the park closed in March, one of her kids was in a band competition or something.  They stayed the whole weekend and she said it was terrific, almost no one in the parks, virtually no lines for anything.  None of them got sick, but I'm not so sure I could've done it.

For me it’s not worth the money to fly down, stay, with no park hopper, fireworks, full character meals or parades. Add in COVID-19!!! And no. I will wait. I understand the world will be different and 2021 wont be like 2019 but it will be better than now. I had tickets to Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween party!🥺 

2021 is 50th anniversary so I will likely going twice (September and first week of December).

Of course I respect all of their safety precautions, and I’m not “upset” at them, I’m just staying home. Vacation is a luxury and I am safe and healthy inside. 

When I called the customer service rep to move my September 2020 payment to 2021 I told her “ I know you have a hard job right now and many people haven’t been kind, but I wanted YOU to have a Magical Day. Thank you.
She said “you just made my day!!”🥰

[doodlebug]

1 minute ago, Scarlett45 said:

For me it’s not worth the money to fly down, stay, with no park hopper, fireworks, full character meals or parades. Add in COVID-19!!! And no. I will wait. I understand the world will be different and 2021 wont be like 2019 but it will be better than now. I had tickets to Mickey’s Not So Scary Halloween party!🥺 

2021 is 50th anniversary so I will likely going twice (September and first week of December).

Of course I respect all of their safety precautions, and I’m not “upset” at them, I’m just staying home. Vacation is a luxury and I am safe and healthy inside. 

When I called the customer service rep to move my September 2020 payment to 2021 I told her “ I know you have a hard job right now and many people haven’t been kind, but I wanted YOU to have a Magical Day. Thank you.
She said “you just made my day!!”🥰

The folks who work for Disney could teach anyone a lesson in customer service.  There's a reason why they're a leader in customer satisfaction.  You never talk to anyone, not a reservations clerk, not a custodian who is not polite and friendly.  And, being a geek, I kinda love it when they call me 'Princess'.  Did you know that Disney employees are never allowed to tell a customer, 'I don't know'?  Aside from their extensive training in everything Disney, they are required to find someone who DOES know the answer to any question asked by a guest.

I haven't done the Halloween party, but Mickey's Christmas Party has become a family favorite.  One of my sisters, who also loved Disney, died suddenly a few years back and we were all feeling less than festive at Christmas.  So, I planned a family trip to Disney for all of us including my sister's husband and two kids in December.  11 of us spent 4 days there and it was fabulous.

[Ijustwantsomechips]

@SunnyBeBe I’m sorry to hear about your aunt.  It sounds like she died peacefully and surrounded by loved ones, even if not physically, so I hope you can take some comfort in that.  

[Scarlett45]

19 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

I haven't done the Halloween party, but Mickey's Christmas Party has become a family favorite. 

I haven’t done a Halloween party yet either. My Mom and I did the Christmas party in 2017 and it was amazing. If they have it in 2021 we will get tickets. 

[Ijustwantsomechips]

We did the Christmas Party one year and it stormed so bad they canceled the parade.  We decided to stick it out since we’d driven eleven hours to get there.  Disney provided a cute little mini parade to announce the cancellation once the rain slowed.  Then the weather cleared enough to see the fireworks and castle lighting.  Then they had the parade too and we had a prime viewing spot right across from the square dance band.  

I rode Space Mountain four times in a row with no wait because most people left due to the weather.  Considering you can access the entire park for just the cost of the Christmas Party ticket, or at least you could back in 2013, it was a great deal. 

Edited July 24, 2020 by Ijustwantsomechips

[doodlebug]

2 minutes ago, Ijustwantsomechips said:

We did the Christmas Party one year and it stormed so bad they canceled the parade.  We decided to stick it out since we’d driven eleven hours to get there.  Disney provided a cute little mini parade to announce the cancellation once the rain slowed.  Then the weather cleared enough to see the fireworks and castle lighting.  Then they had the parade too and we had a prime viewing spot right across from the square dance band.  

I rode Space Mountain four times in a row with no wait because most people left due to the weather.  Considering you can access the entire park for just the coat of the Christmas Party ticket, or at least you could back in 2013, it was a great deal. 

Christmas party tickets run 100 bucks and up, depending on the date these days.  In addition, you have to have a valid park ticket for that date, so it is IN ADDITION to regular admission.  Not cheap.

If you like the rides in the Magic Kingdom, the Christmas Party is a great time to have easy access, particularly if you don't watch the first parade (there are 2 and they are both the same, one early and one later in the evening).  A lot of people with young kids clear out after the first parade, so, as the evening wears on, the lines get shorter and shorter, too.  I don't think I've ever waited more than 10 minutes during the Christmas Party to ride anything, even Space Mountain and the 7 Dwarfs Mine Ride which seem to be the most popular rides in the Magic Kingdom.  The party runs from something like 7PM-midnight, so there is a lot of opportunity if you like the rides.