Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[Scarlett45]

I made a virtual appointment with my therapist- I need a tune up. Yay for Thursday. I haven’t been since November after my god mother was diagnosed with cancer. 

[Zella]

Has anyone heard from @Jynnan tonnix lately? I haven't seen her on the forums in awhile, and I just checked, and she hasn't posted in over 2 weeks. 😞 

[Barb23]

7 hours ago, Zella said:

Has anyone heard from @Jynnan tonnix lately? I haven't seen her on the forums in awhile, and I just checked, and she hasn't posted in over 2 weeks. 😞 

I was thinking about her also. Hope things are OK with her mother. 

[ChiCricket]

On 5/18/2020 at 11:42 AM, Scarlett45 said:

One of the many things I did this weekend was plant flowers in my outdoor pots AND get the silicone spikes put up so no more pigeons. I did feel so bad for the pigeon- it worked so hard on this nest!

 

We have a bird's nest in our upstairs bathroom's exhaust vent. It has babies in it chirping away at all hours. I can't wait until they vacate and we can clean it out and fix it so the parents can't build a new one after they leave the nest.

I'm not even sure if that happens more than just once in the spring? But I want my bathroom fan back!  I need to be able to use it with the husband I have! (He needs more fiber.)😝

We had to put tape over the switch to the fan so we wouldn't forget and use it, and hurt the babies. But I'm ready to evict..they have to be teenagers by now.😂

[ChiCricket]

On 5/19/2020 at 11:21 AM, frenchtoast said:

So, the high school has sent out the new date for graduation and how it will proceed. It's...something. The family will be in a car and follow the student as he walks to a stage to get the diploma and get a picture taken. The stage is in a parking lot with the construction site of the new high school as a backdrop. (It's just girders at this point). Should be interesting. 

This week , I have virtually attended one high school graduation,  two 8th grade graduations, and a kindergarten and preschool graduation (give me a break on the preschool one🙄 😄)

 They all were very different from normal ones..that's for sure! They were all prerecorded, and all of our family had a watch party for each one, so we felt like we were there together..since we watched at the same time. I am so tired just from the virtual ones..imagine if we actually had to get dressed up and really go to them all!

 One upside is that normally everyone is admonished not to clap or cheer for your graduate, until all the names were called..well, we all whooped and cheered LOUDLY  for our  high school granddaughter Elizabeth..and nobody but my own family knew.💖

Ps we had a graduation birthday parade for her..but it was pouring rain...of course.🙃

(2nd pic is of my German granddaughter Jasmine, who was attending a virtual honor roll assembly and was surprised to find out she made the principal's honor roll.)🤗 

 

 

 

Edited May 23, 2020 by ChiCricket
brag brag brag 😎

[ChiCricket]

On 5/19/2020 at 8:31 PM, Temperance said:

Someone I know  just died.  She's been sick a long time (before 2020). I didn't think she would die soon. I'm very surprised. If you could pray or send good vibes to her husband and her daughter, her stepdaughter and all of her friends and family that would be appreciated. 

So sorry to hear of this 😢

[ChiCricket]

On 5/20/2020 at 8:14 AM, Scarlett45 said:

saw. I hope they do okay- the smallest was only 1lbs 15oz.
Only 70 sets of identical quads in the entire world!

Here's an update.

[Chicklet]

That dog looks terrified lol.

[doodlebug]

40 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

That dog looks terrified lol.

He's got his reasons.

[ChiCricket]

My area is under a tornado warning right now 😱

[Scarlett45]

5 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

My area is under a tornado warning right now 😱

Yeah I got the alert. Be careful!

 

I spoke to my postal carrier today- seems a guy has been sitting on my front porch and stealing packages. She didn’t confront him for her safety (of course not! No need to put herself in danger for a package). I showed her a new hiding place in the back and I a missing a package that was delivered Thursday (according to the tracking) and that was the day she saw him steal with her own two eyes. 
 

I spoke to customer service at Torrid (where the package was from) and I have to wait until the 27th to put in a replacement order so I will call back then. 

[jjane]

@Nysha, my heart breaks for you that you were not able to keep your grandson. I feel the same way now. We did not get permanent custody. I thought when we went in Wednesday that is would go that way. The judge allowed the statement by opposing counsel that they could not listen to anything Alonna had to say because she was bipolar go with no comment. Alonna was sure she would be going back home with us and was devastated, especially since the judge didn't give us any time. 

Her mother got on the stand and it was like watching a play. She knew exactly what her attorney would ask and when so she was prepared with her lies. I insisted on getting back on the stand but my attorney didn't ask the questions that would have allowed me to refute the most important things she lied about. Basically she assassinated our characters, including accusing my husband of sexual abuse. My attorney just caved. I was out-lawyered. Apparently mine is great in the office and on the phone and absolute shit in court.

No shockern  when we pulled up to bring Alonna to her mother, she was already on the phone reporting us for some transgression. We were early and  started yelling at us before we got out of the car, saying she was recording and not even greeting Alonna except to yell at her to get in the car.  The police had no idea why she called them. Less than 2 hours later I am hearing her mother twisted her arm to get a piece of paper from her. The police were called and another stay in a facility was threatened. I begged the police to take her to safety but they said previous abuse did not mean they could do anything at that point. Next thing I know Alonna is calling me saying they were coming to arrest me. The shit mom called her attorney and said I filed a false police report and claimed I had custondy.

At this point I have no idea if Alonna is in a facility, hurt, dead by suicide or beaten to a pulp. 

The only ran of hope, and I use the term loosely, is that I called her new therapist and was told that something Alonna told her the day before court  was something that will trigger a report by her to CPS as a mandated reporter. She says most of what she was told was bad enough but that this particular thing is beyond the pale. She says they will probably open up another investigation and since this is coming from a professional rather than just me, it should have  more weight. She is also willing to write a report to the judge in hopes of having him vacate the judgement.  Cross your fingers.

Sorry for the wall of text. Thanks for listening. The support here really helps tremendously.

Again, Nysha, I'm so sorry about your situation. I wish it had had a better outcome. Much love and hugs to you.

I'll keep you all posted. Much love to all, Janet

 

[galaxychaser]

3 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Yeah I got the alert. Be careful!

 

I spoke to my postal carrier today- seems a guy has been sitting on my front porch and stealing packages. She didn’t confront him for her safety (of course not! No need to put herself in danger for a package). I showed her a new hiding place in the back and I a missing a package that was delivered Thursday (according to the tracking) and that was the day she saw him steal with her own two eyes. 
 

I spoke to customer service at Torrid (where the package was from) and I have to wait until the 27th to put in a replacement order so I will call back then. 

I had a tenant in my building try to steal my package right in front of my nose! 

[Nysha]

@jjane, I'm so sorry. I was really hoping that things would go different for you. It is so heartbreaking to have to watch as the system fails these beloved children over and over.

I adopted my daughter from foster care and know from reports that CPS had been involved when her birth mother was a child. So there is at least 3 generations of abused children that the courts have turned their backs on in just one family. 

I really hope that the report from the therapist is the tipping point for your niece. 

[ChiCricket]

4 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

My area is under a tornado warning right now 😱

Aaaand..it didn't even sprinkle here😂 (it just started pouring..I jinxed it) 

Edited May 24, 2020 by ChiCricket

[Temperance]

@jjane Your niece at least knows you love her and believe her and that will always mean something to her. Stay strong and keep doing what you can.

@Jynnan tonnix I also know have been thinking of you. I hope your family and you are okay. 

I'm still dealing with fallout from my loss. I'm trying to stay postive and hope for the best. 

[galaxychaser]

David Muir real voice

 

 

it’s so different than the one he uses on air!

 

[galaxychaser]

14 hours ago, jjane said:

@Nysha, my heart breaks for you that you were not able to keep your grandson. I feel the same way now. We did not get permanent custody. I thought when we went in Wednesday that is would go that way. The judge allowed the statement by opposing counsel that they could not listen to anything Alonna had to say because she was bipolar go with no comment. Alonna was sure she would be going back home with us and was devastated, especially since the judge didn't give us any time. 

Her mother got on the stand and it was like watching a play. She knew exactly what her attorney would ask and when so she was prepared with her lies. I insisted on getting back on the stand but my attorney didn't ask the questions that would have allowed me to refute the most important things she lied about. Basically she assassinated our characters, including accusing my husband of sexual abuse. My attorney just caved. I was out-lawyered. Apparently mine is great in the office and on the phone and absolute shit in court.

No shockern  when we pulled up to bring Alonna to her mother, she was already on the phone reporting us for some transgression. We were early and  started yelling at us before we got out of the car, saying she was recording and not even greeting Alonna except to yell at her to get in the car.  The police had no idea why she called them. Less than 2 hours later I am hearing her mother twisted her arm to get a piece of paper from her. The police were called and another stay in a facility was threatened. I begged the police to take her to safety but they said previous abuse did not mean they could do anything at that point. Next thing I know Alonna is calling me saying they were coming to arrest me. The shit mom called her attorney and said I filed a false police report and claimed I had custondy.

At this point I have no idea if Alonna is in a facility, hurt, dead by suicide or beaten to a pulp. 

The only ran of hope, and I use the term loosely, is that I called her new therapist and was told that something Alonna told her the day before court  was something that will trigger a report by her to CPS as a mandated reporter. She says most of what she was told was bad enough but that this particular thing is beyond the pale. She says they will probably open up another investigation and since this is coming from a professional rather than just me, it should have  more weight. She is also willing to write a report to the judge in hopes of having him vacate the judgement.  Cross your fingers.

Sorry for the wall of text. Thanks for listening. The support here really helps tremendously.

Again, Nysha, I'm so sorry about your situation. I wish it had had a better outcome. Much love and hugs to you.

I'll keep you all posted. Much love to all, Janet

 

Please keep us updated. 

[Barb23]

5 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

David Muir real voice

 

 

it’s so different than the one he uses on air!

 

That's funny. I think most of us have a "professional" voice we use especially on the phone for business calls. I know I did as my job as a receptionist answering the phones for years.  My sister & I used to kid each other when we called the other one at work & we answered the phone using our "business" voices.  But then we switched to our regular voice when we recognized who was calling. 

[doodlebug]

1 hour ago, Barb23 said:

That's funny. I think most of us have a "professional" voice we use especially on the phone for business calls. I know I did as my job as a receptionist answering the phones for years.  My sister & I used to kid each other when we called the other one at work & we answered the phone using our "business" voices.  But then we switched to our regular voice when we recognized who was calling. 

I've got a friend who is a dj who has one of those 'classic announcer voices', deep and rich.  He makes a nice living and does a ton of voiceovers for commercials and such on the side.  His regular speaking voice is actually quite nice, but, when he turns it on and does his 'radio voice', it is kinda freaky.  

I also got the shock of my life many years back, when I attended my current church for the first time.  Like most Catholic Churches, there are parishioners who volunteer as lectors, introducing the hymns, reading the epistles, leading certain prayers.  I was at Mass and the lector came to the front and started going over a couple of announcements before the service.  My jaw dropped, I couldn't believe my ears.  The only thing I could think when he opened his mouth was, "you've got mail'.  Yeah, that guy!  He worked for a local TV station in production and occasionally did voiceovers there.  Meanwhile, his wife worked for a major ad agency and one of her clients was this little online service provider who wanted to get a higher profile.  She developed the campaign and had him record the 'You've got mail' tagline with the idea that they'd eventually get someone else to do it for the actual email.  But, AOL liked his voice, and he became 'You've got mail' to the entire world; at least when he wasn't announcing at Mass in a Cleveland suburb.  They retired to Florida a while back and I think he may no longer be with us, but he was a real guy and that was his voice.

Edited May 24, 2020 by doodlebug

[crazycatlady58]

Many many years ago I read a book about a pastor and his family. The  book was written in the 50s. Dad is out, gets a phone call and the son answers. When dad get home the son tell him about the call but of course the son forgot to get a name. All is not lost because the kid tells him " I know it was a preacher ". Dad ask " How do you know if you did not get a name?" Sons answer.." The voice, dad, the voice ".

[PikaScrewChu]

20 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

Aaaand..it didn't even sprinkle here😂 (it just started pouring..I jinxed it) 

We were supposed to get a torrential downpour today. I was really hoping for it to break the heat. Weather has said nah. The air conditioning in my building broke down and we don't have an estimated time when it will be fixed because contractors are slammed right now. I'm hoping tomorrow. I haven't moved far from my bed or couch the past few days. I'm okay when I wake up but by noon the heat sickness has kicked in.

I should document this when I whine about not getting to go to the beach this summer. PikaScrewChu, you get sick from heat! 

[galaxychaser]

So I think my building is on fire. I woke up like 7:30 am because it stunk so bad. I just ran out there in 10 minutes. I’m far away at a target freaking out. I’m so scared to live there. 3 smoke/fires in 6 years. Landlord isn’t fixing anything that causes fire. 
 

I am having a full blown panic attack. I seriously can’t calm down.

[Oldernowiser]

Breathe, sweetie...you’re safe right now. I’m so sorry for this latest nightmare! I am sending you a huge hug. Is there a neighbor you can call to find out what’s happening? Or call the landlord? You can also call 911...if there’s a fire they’d know.

Deep breaths. We’re here for you.

[DangerousMinds]

1 hour ago, galaxychaser said:

So I think my building is on fire. I woke up like 7:30 am because it stunk so bad. I just ran out there in 10 minutes. I’m far away at a target freaking out. I’m so scared to live there. 3 smoke/fires in 6 years. Landlord isn’t fixing anything that causes fire. 
 

I am having a full blown panic attack. I seriously can’t calm down.

Was the fire department there?

[lookeyloo]

On 5/24/2020 at 11:35 AM, doodlebug said:

I've got a friend who is a dj who has one of those 'classic announcer voices', deep and rich.  He makes a nice living and does a ton of voiceovers for commercials and such on the side.  His regular speaking voice is actually quite nice, but, when he turns it on and does his 'radio voice', it is kinda freaky.  

I also got the shock of my life many years back, when I attended my current church for the first time.  Like most Catholic Churches, there are parishioners who volunteer as lectors, introducing the hymns, reading the epistles, leading certain prayers.  I was at Mass and the lector came to the front and started going over a couple of announcements before the service.  My jaw dropped, I couldn't believe my ears.  The only thing I could think when he opened his mouth was, "you've got mail'.  Yeah, that guy!  He worked for a local TV station in production and occasionally did voiceovers there.  Meanwhile, his wife worked for a major ad agency and one of her clients was this little online service provider who wanted to get a higher profile.  She developed the campaign and had him record the 'You've got mail' tagline with the idea that they'd eventually get someone else to do it for the actual email.  But, AOL liked his voice, and he became 'You've got mail' to the entire world; at least when he wasn't announcing at Mass in a Cleveland suburb.  They retired to Florida a while back and I think he may no longer be with us, but he was a real guy and that was his voice.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elwood_Edwards

this guy?  What fun.

[galaxychaser]

20 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

Was the fire department there?

I don’t know I left. Just hearing sirens sends me into the panic mode. Fun times. 

[Oldernowiser]

Call 911 and ask? If you’re concerned about it, don’t be...my latest lockdown hobby is listening to the local EMT/Sheriff’s transmissions on a scanner app and the huge majority of 911 calls are just silly (my personal favorite is “fall, no injury.” WTF?)

Can you get a cup of herbal tea at Target (ours has a Starbucks) and just focus on breathing for a bit?
 

 

[galaxychaser]

I’m not interested in calling anyone 

Had some coffee and maybe will take a nap on a bench 

 

[fonfereksglen]

1 minute ago, Oldernowiser said:

Call 911 and ask? If you’re concerned about it, don’t be...my latest lockdown hobby is listening to the local EMT/Sheriff’s transmissions on a scanner app and the huge majority of 911 calls are just silly (my personal favorite is “fall, no injury.” WTF?)

Can you get a cup of herbal tea at Target (ours has a Starbucks) and just focus on breathing for a bit?
 

 

Fall/No injury is probably an elderly person with a monitor that needs assistance getting off the floor.  Some type of emergency vehicle shows up frequently on our street to perform that service because  an older man falls and his wife is unable to help him up.  At least the lesser code means no sirens.

 

 

[Oldernowiser]

4 minutes ago, fonfereksglen said:

Fall/No injury is probably an elderly person with a monitor that needs assistance getting off the floor.  Some type of emergency vehicle shows up frequently on our street to perform that service because  an older man falls and his wife is unable to help him up.  At least the lesser code means no sirens.

 

 

Oh. Well I’m an asshole. Oops.

[fonfereksglen]

3 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Oh. Well I’m an asshole. Oops.

Nah.  Just remember the old "I've fallen and I can't get up" commercials and giggle.  

[Absolom]

They get a lot of those where my mother lives.  They are required to call 911 if a resident falls and they think they hit their head.  No injury is usually no visible injury.

[doodlebug]

1 hour ago, lookeyloo said:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elwood_Edwards

this guy?  What fun.

Yep, that's the guy

 

[galaxychaser]

1 hour ago, fonfereksglen said:

Fall/No injury is probably an elderly person with a monitor that needs assistance getting off the floor.  Some type of emergency vehicle shows up frequently on our street to perform that service because  an older man falls and his wife is unable to help him up.  At least the lesser code means no sirens.

 

 

I used to call 911 for emt to pick my mom off the floor. I couldn’t lift her off the ground. 
 

[crazycatlady58]

1 hour ago, galaxychaser said:

I’m not interested in calling anyone 

Had some coffee and maybe will take a nap on a bench 

 

Be safe.

[lookeyloo]

32 minutes ago, doodlebug said:

Yep, that's the guy

 

That is too cool 

[andromeda331]

33 minutes ago, galaxychaser said:

I used to call 911 for emt to pick my mom off the floor. I couldn’t lift her off the ground. 
 

My dad and I had to do that a few times for my mom. She felt a couple times in the couple years of her life. Neither of us could lift her either. We tried. But both our bodies have been mired with health problems. It sucked and we both felt guilty that we couldn't help her up. But the EMTs were always really nice about it. 

[Jynnan tonnix]

Aww...many warm fuzzies to those who mentioned my absence. I've been lurking on and off, but haven't had much incentive to post. 

All is going well enough, but I find that having Mom living here with us full time is bringing out facets of my personality that I don't even want to recognize, and I guess I feel that if I started posting again, I'd do a lot of whining and venting, and, in the major scheme of things, it's all far more my own personality disorders and chronically low self esteem contributing to it rather than any actual harm done. I just really hate myself right now for the person I seem to have become, but don't really know how to squelch the rabid passive-aggressive monster in me. I know that she is, in all reality, practically a saint, but I'm so worthless in comparison that I can't stand the constant reminder of just how much...Anyway, yeah. That's why I've been gone. I don't want to subject anyone to my fits of gloom.

 

[doodlebug]

10 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Aww...many warm fuzzies to those who mentioned my absence. I've been lurking on and off, but haven't had much incentive to post. 

All is going well enough, but I find that having Mom living here with us full time is bringing out facets of my personality that I don't even want to recognize, and I guess I feel that if I started posting again, I'd do a lot of whining and venting, and, in the major scheme of things, it's all far more my own personality disorders and chronically low self esteem contributing to it rather than any actual harm done. I just really hate myself right now for the person I seem to have become, but don't really know how to squelch the rabid passive-aggressive monster in me. I know that she is, in all reality, practically a saint, but I'm so worthless in comparison that I can't stand the constant reminder of just how much...Anyway, yeah. That's why I've been gone. I don't want to subject anyone to my fits of gloom.

 

Jynnan,  never feel that you cannot come here to vent, that's what friends are for.  I am sure your mother is neither as saintly as you think nor are you as awful as you think.  It is tough as an adult to live with a parent; I couldn't do it.  There's a reason we grow up and move away.  

So, come here and tell us your troubles, it might make it easier to put on a happy face for your Mom.

[Marshmallow Mollie]

I used to have a personal rule to not be around my mother for more than 72 hours, then it was 48, then overnight, and now it’s around 3 hours. I had to spend a lot of time with her last summer, and it messed me up mentally for several weeks. 
 

The stress from the pandemic is crushing already, add to that a unexpected roommate, and add on that a parent- it’s the situation that sucks, not you!

[Temperance]

@Jynnan tonnix One of the wisest things that my mama told me is that "Everybody's mother drives them crazy."  I don't think you're worthless either, at least not to us. 

It might hard during coronavirus, but I think it's worth a try to find a conselor right now.  Someone you could talk to maybe once a week over the phone or even just email when your mom is driving you nuts. Being that old isn't that easy and neither is being the caregiver. Every person I know in that role has stories just like parents do about the kids. 

I'm still having a tough week. I don't part of it is just quarantine moodiness. Part of it is grief. I'm so lucky in many ways, and yet I feel like things could be so much better.  I hate that my life feels so far behind. I feel very lonely. I suppose it's my own fault for not trying harder to find friends on-line. I'm want to go out and yet I feel guilty for not social distancing. I'm trying to split the difference by wearing the mask and going on little errands like I went to a convenience store last night. Only the clerk and I were in the store. 

@galaxychaser Maybe you should get one of those I've fallen, but I can't get up buttons. I know you're young, but I also know you live alone and it might be comforting to know you just have to push the button to get help. Anxiety is big problem for all of us right now. Bad things, uncertain times, and lack of exercise can exacerbate those things.  I feel like I should do sit-ups to help with my anxiety. If you don't like my suggestions, just ignore them or maybe laugh if you want to. I hope I didn't offend you. 

Here's a joke for everyone:

Question: What did the horse say to the angry cow? (Answer in spoiler)

 

Spoiler

Answer: What's your beef? 

Source: Popsicle stick. 

 

[galaxychaser]

44 minutes ago, Temperance said:

@Jynnan tonnix One of the wisest things that my mama told me is that "Everybody's mother drives them crazy."  I don't think you're worthless either, at least not to us. 

It might hard during coronavirus, but I think it's worth a try to find a conselor right now.  Someone you could talk to maybe once a week over the phone or even just email when your mom is driving you nuts. Being that old isn't that easy and neither is being the caregiver. Every person I know in that role has stories just like parents do about the kids. 

I'm still having a tough week. I don't part of it is just quarantine moodiness. Part of it is grief. I'm so lucky in many ways, and yet I feel like things could be so much better.  I hate that my life feels so far behind. I feel very lonely. I suppose it's my own fault for not trying harder to find friends on-line. I'm want to go out and yet I feel guilty for not social distancing. I'm trying to split the difference by wearing the mask and going on little errands like I went to a convenience store last night. Only the clerk and I were in the store. 

@galaxychaser Maybe you should get one of those I've fallen, but I can't get up buttons. I know you're young, but I also know you live alone and it might be comforting to know you just have to push the button to get help. Anxiety is big problem for all of us right now. Bad things, uncertain times, and lack of exercise can exacerbate those things.  I feel like I should do sit-ups to help with my anxiety. If you don't like my suggestions, just ignore them or maybe laugh if you want to. I hope I didn't offend you. 

Here's a joke for everyone:

Question: What did the horse say to the angry cow? (Answer in spoiler)

 

  Hide contents

Answer: What's your beef? 

Source: Popsicle stick. 

 

I’m in my 30s too young for that life alert button. 

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Aww...many warm fuzzies to those who mentioned my absence. I've been lurking on and off, but haven't had much incentive to post. 

All is going well enough, but I find that having Mom living here with us full time is bringing out facets of my personality that I don't even want to recognize, and I guess I feel that if I started posting again, I'd do a lot of whining and venting, and, in the major scheme of things, it's all far more my own personality disorders and chronically low self esteem contributing to it rather than any actual harm done. I just really hate myself right now for the person I seem to have become, but don't really know how to squelch the rabid passive-aggressive monster in me. I know that she is, in all reality, practically a saint, but I'm so worthless in comparison that I can't stand the constant reminder of just how much...Anyway, yeah. That's why I've been gone. I don't want to subject anyone to my fits of gloom.

 

Vent away ! I was thinking how you were doing. 

[ChiCricket]

3 hours ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

Aww...many warm fuzzies to those who mentioned my absence. I've been lurking on and off, but haven't had much incentive to post. 

All is going well enough, but I find that having Mom living here with us full time is bringing out facets of my personality that I don't even want to recognize, and I guess I feel that if I started posting again, I'd do a lot of whining and venting, 

What? This is my only safe place to vent and complain...do I have to stop?😁

Ps....to stop myself from typing out a long angry post about one of my daughters, I decided to add a mask to my avatar instead. (Very badly done)😂

Anyone else want to try?  Here's the site I used:

https://www.kapwing.com/explore/maskon-your-profile-picture-for-covid19-safety

Edited May 26, 2020 by ChiCricket

[GeeGolly]

@Jynnan tonnix, please hang in there, during this time I think we're all seeing parts of ourselves that aren't the prettiest.

If I may offer some thoughts, please try not to compare yourself to your mom (or anyone). Most often feelings of despair follow when we compare. Try not to guess what your mom is thinking, more times than not, we are wrong when we do this. And don't forget, everyone, including moms, have opinions, but they're opinions and we don't have to internalize them. Hard not to do sometimes, but our reactions can be changed with some practice.

And lastly, get as much space and time away from your mom that you can. Garden, do another art project, etc.

And one more thing. We are living through a time that we only read about. I think we all need to be more gracious to ourselves.

[Mindthinkr]

I hope everyone is doing well today. I have my ups and downs, but not bad at  isolation. I’m good at amusing myself and getting better at gardening. I have been seeing all the tourists and people at our local beaches. It makes me want to continue to stay isolated because I’m sure a second wave is going to hit our area. (Coastal NC) No social distancing. No masks. It’s just scary. 
   My relationship with my daughter has changed. It might be because she has more time to think about things rather than work 2 jobs, care for 3 kids, a husband and the animal menagerie they have. I’m now getting more calls. She will drop off packages or will shop for me. I was used to seeing her once every 2nd or 3rd month and now we are up to twice a week average. She starts a new job June 1st so I’m going to miss all this extra positive time that we have had, but I understand she needs to work. She also won’t need the 2nd job anymore as she will have a higher salary. Ah well. Back to hour long conversations with the cats lol. (They wish this would last forever because I am good staff and on call 24/7). 
   I’m hoping the tides turn for the better for everybody soon. I may not write here a lot, but I do care for y’all and always am wishing y’all the best. Stay safe and be well. Hugs to anyone who needs one. 

[lookeyloo]

I'm finding I'm doing okay with the quarantine.  In the beginning we spent five and half weeks with the sick son.  We have our own space, lots of amenities, stocked bar, etc.  We went nowhere.  Except to walk in the neighborhood.  We finally came home after clearing with an infectious disease doctor that if we continued doing this we could go between our houses.  Which we have done.  Sick son has been to doctor a few times, and Sunday ventured out to Costco.  The one he went to was very compliant and all customers very cooperative.  He enjoyed the outing.  I have gone to the grocery store 3 times, early on a Sunday morning.  I felt okay about that.  I don't miss what I thought I would.  Or people I thought I would.  I wish I could visit the grands, but, that would take an airplane ride and not ready.  Since Instacart has worked out so well for us, we have a stocked pantry.  I have been cutting Mr. lookeyloo's hair and have watched a lot of  youtube videos. I got us a clipper set and used it yesterday.  Will take some practice, but, it was an acceptable job.  I like how I do it because he goes to the place and says #3 clipper and he gets it very short. I'm not doing that.  We consider ourselves lucky that we are on pensions so don't have to worry about money and we have enough toilet paper.  I wonder how all of this will eventually go.  Will people wear masks forever?  At least the ones who wear masks?   Will social distancing be a thing in the future?  How will this affect the flu season?  What about the common cold?  will all those rates be less?  Will NYC continue to sanitize the subway cars?  ETc.

[Oldernowiser]

Okay...you’re a smart, compassionate group...did I do the wrong thing?

My 92 y.o. mother has been in Assisted Living for 3 1/2 years. My father died 2 1/2 years ago. In general, she is a cheerful, ridiculously optimistic person (clearly I take after my father) and she has handled it all pretty well, although her dementia has increasingly progressed.

Usually when she comes up with something completely nonsensical, she’ll snap back to reality in a bit if you just let her keep talking. Usually.

For the first time two days ago when I called her, she was talking like my father was still alive. It was like she’d gone back to when they first moved into AL and my father hated it, and she was saying that she was okay with it but she wasn’t sure he’d stay.

I just...froze. She was saying it all so factually that I had to pinch myself to remember that this is in fact, 2020. But I kept quiet, thinking she’d come back to reality.

But it went on. After a while, she started saying she didn’t know where he’d gotten to, like she was going to call him to the phone, and I just blurted, “Mom, he’s dead.”  She sort of shifted back into the present then. Sort of.

Should I have just let her stay in her memories? Honestly, if I’d heard her start calling him I was going to lose it. It was close, anyway...my father and I did not get along and she refused to see it or acknowledge his part in it when she did. So this hit a pretty hot button for me.

What should I have done? When someone is that far down the road, is it kinder to let them keep walking?

 

[rue721]

My grandma has very progressed dementia. The doctors recommended for us to just play along with whatever she’s saying, at least if what she’s saying is reasonably happy. Correcting her will just make her distressed, and there’s not really any reason to do that.

[Ohiopirate02]

55 minutes ago, Mindthinkr said:

I hope everyone is doing well today. I have my ups and downs, but not bad at  isolation. I’m good at amusing myself and getting better at gardening. I have been seeing all the tourists and people at our local beaches. It makes me want to continue to stay isolated because I’m sure a second wave is going to hit our area. (Coastal NC) No social distancing. No masks. It’s just scary. 
   

I went to Atlantic Beach on Sunday.  Friends have a timeshare at one of the condo places, so we had a place to park and a real bathroom we could use.  The beach was crowded, but everyone was keeping their distance.  Almost everyone was using this new shade which takes up a decent amount of beach

https://shibumishade.com/