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Kailyn: Kail Smash!


SPLAIN
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My parents took a long time to name me, and what they came up with is not really great.  Anyway, I was born in California in the 70s and they had to put something down before I left the hospital.  I was officially Baby Girl Lastname* until like 4 months later, and they amended the birth certificate.

Just to clarify, I wasn't Baby Girl Lastname, I was Baby Girl and then my actual last name.  

Edited by heatherchandler
  • Love 13


It's just so strange, that they're at home referring to him as "the baby" or "him" or "your brother". 

I remember looking at boy-child (we're pretending that's his real name for the purpose of this convo) and being like "hi boy-child!!!  where's boy-child's feet?' and things like that

and, I mean, I guess we can say what we want about Jenelle, but at least all her kids came home from the hospitals with names, right?

Edited by teapot
  • Love 6
2 hours ago, Tatum said:

I checked out Amber Porkwood and she retweeted the question from someone on twitter about why Kail doesn't wear a seatbelt while driving.

 

Porkwood replies, probably because she doesn't own an obesity extender. But I am selling them now at my boutique!

 

Hahahahahahaha.

lol Porkwood is a riot. And a truth-teller. Hmm...any chance Porkwood is really Simon? 

 

4 hours ago, GleamingMist said:

Simon is made of win.  I'm an asshole I think because I busted a gut laughing at that.

I laughed as well. He provided the proof regarding the weight limit. Kail is an abuser and has made racist comments. Simon can call her out all he wants. I will eat popcorn and enjoy. 

  • Love 9
3 hours ago, heatherchandler said:

My parents took a long time to name me, and what they came up with is not really great.  Anyway, I was born in California in the 70s and they had to put something down before I left the hospital.  I was officially Baby Girl Lastname* until like 4 months later, and they amended the birth certificate.

Just to clarify, I wasn't Baby Girl Lastname, I was Baby Girl and then my actual last name.  

Exactly this.  Baby [gender] [last name].  I dated a guy who had one of those, and then three amendments until his parents settled on a name.  They were not decisive people.  

  • Love 4
6 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

lol Porkwood is a riot. And a truth-teller. Hmm...any chance Porkwood is really Simon? 

 

I don't think so...Porkwood has some pretty good lines, and Simon seems like the kind of guy who would hate having his funniest work attributed to someone else.

 

Who wants to take bets on how long it takes Kail to publish a heavily photoshopped selfie after Simon dropped that weight restriction burn??

  • Love 1
9 minutes ago, Lemur said:

Exactly this.  Baby [gender] [last name].  I dated a guy who had one of those, and then three amendments until his parents settled on a name.  They were not decisive people.  

That is too funny!  I wonder how many amendments one has until they say, "no, that's it!"

 

6 minutes ago, Tatum said:

I don't think so...Porkwood has some pretty good lines, and Simon seems like the kind of guy who would hate having his funniest work attributed to someone else.

 

I really love when people don't realize it is PorKwood and retweet her, or better, reply as if it is really Amber.

  • Love 6
43 minutes ago, heatherchandler said:

That is too funny!  I wonder how many amendments one has until they say, "no, that's it!"

 

I really love when people don't realize it is PorKwood and retweet her, or better, reply as if it is really Amber.

Didn't Cate do that? Porkwood was mocking Matt and his abandonment of his kids and Cate's reunited show, and stupid Cate was like, great idea!

 

Also, Porkwood hosted some kind of poll that said which Teen Mom do you hate the most, then tweeted the real Amber and said, hey, you won! I laughed so hard.

  • Love 8
On 9/6/2017 at 4:44 PM, Maharincess said:

Reading through the thread I realized I'm once again in the minority. I was reading the pages about how a lot of you think Javi is a good guy, doesn't deserve this etc.  I'm the exact opposite. Karma is slapping Javi upside the head and I for one am glad. I can't forget the shit he happily partnered  with Karl and did to Jo. Right down to video taping Jo in the front yard of Jo's own home. He willingly participated in trying to alienate Jo from Isaac, he talked major shit about how Jo doesn't take care of his son etc etc. So no, I do not think he's a good guy and I think he's getting exactly what he deserves. 

Edit: I've never been to Starbucks (and never will) but at places like it, I just use the name Ann. Nice and simple. 

he was just following Kail's lead. Love is blind, sometimes, and he'd only heard her perspective and what she told him about everything. 

also, it seems like javi's personality is such that's more...structured, for lack of better word, than Jo's. Jo is more laid back. And personalities like that often clash when it comes to making arrangements for things.  Javi is the type of person that, if you arrange to meet up at 5 on the dot, he's there at exactly 5 on the dot, not 5:01, but 5. Jo, on the other hand, is more relaxed, so showing up at 5:15 or maybe even 5:20, 5:30 is not that big of a deal to him. 

One of the main things they'd fight about were drop-offs and who gets what weekend with who, etc. Javi was very serious about being a family man, really into it, it was his whole world, whereas with Jo, up until he had his kid with Vee, I feel like he always loved Isaac, but bc he didnt live w/him, Isaac was more just a side-thing that he'd see once or twice a week and meanwhile lived the rest of his life without him for most of the week. So they were just coming from different places. Neither was right or wrong, just different. 

  • Love 4
1 hour ago, SheTalksShit said:

One of the main things they'd fight about were drop-offs and who gets what weekend with who, etc. Javi was very serious about being a family man, really into it, it was his whole world, whereas with Jo, up until he had his kid with Vee, I feel like he always loved Isaac, but bc he didnt live w/him, Isaac was more just a side-thing that he'd see once or twice a week and meanwhile lived the rest of his life without him for most of the week. So they were just coming from different places. Neither was right or wrong, just different. 

Although I agree with your assessment about love and Kail having a strong hold on Javi with regards to how he behaved, I have to strongly disagree there on that bolded point. Jo didn't move to Dover for laughs and kicks. It is a fact he moved there because his time with his son was precious and valuable. He was tired of the 3 hour drives. He wanted to spend that time with his son, not on the road. Jo was late on a few occasions, which can truly happen to the best of parents with the worst of traffic, especially when leaving work and having to deal with a 3 hour commute. In return, the heifer would turn around and then withhold visitation from Jo. We saw her do just that with Javi during the beginning of the season for the same reason - he was not there at the precise hour they agreed upon. People aren't going to speed through traffic or run red lights like this heifer to get where they need to be.

Jo made it clear he would move to the end of the world to where his son was living and that is what made things difficult in Kail's world because she was hoping he would give up and allow her to just go anywhere with the child they share. Jo had a visitation schedule that didn't allow him much time with Isaac. It wasn't what he wanted, but it was what was given to him due to the circumstances that were presented to the court at that time which was he lived in New Jersey and Kail had just moved to Delaware. Kail didn't offer Jo any extra time with Isaac. Now, she is giving him that extra time only because it suits her to have free babysitting on a whim.

Edited by SPLAIN
  • Love 17
19 hours ago, FairyDusted said:

This is crazy! My younger sibs were born in the early 70's and they would not release the baby without a legal name. I told my parents they should have left him there.

Spoken like a true firstborn.

 

18 hours ago, GleamingMist said:

Simon is made of win.  I'm an asshole I think because I busted a gut laughing at that.

Was that you? I thought the neighbor was having a party ;) 

  • Love 5

That weight burn by Simon had to have punched Kailyn's ego. She's the same height as me so after I had my first daughter I weighed 210 pounds and looked somewhat chunky (I'm 5'8" we can weigh a lot and still look slender) and Kailyn looks much bigger than I did so I'm guessing she weighs 220/230. Simon was right on the money with the weight restrictions. 

It's still below the belt to insult a woman postpartum or to body shame anyone but since it's Kailyn and she's heartless and made fun of that "nappy head" chic then fair game. She doesn't deserve to have people censor themselves. She's cold as ice.

ETA: I'm starting to feel bad now. ?

Damn you Simon for making me feel bad for Kailyn! Even though she's a hosebeast I'm starting to hate that he insulted a postpartum chics weight especially when he could stand to lose some weight.

I hate the double standard. Women gain some weight with child bearing and men run their mouths but they can get away with weighing too much due to eating too much.

ETA: Nope. Go ahead Simon! Keep 'me coming. I can't feel bad for Kailyn as she NEVER feels bad for anyone else. 

*Don't mind the argument I'm having with myself on this...* ?

Edited by Calm81
  • Love 9
31 minutes ago, Calm81 said:

That weight burn by Simon had to have punched Kailyn's ego. She's the same height as me so after I had my first daughter I weighed 210 pounds and looked somewhat chunky (I'm 5'8" we can weigh a lot and still look slender) and Kailyn looks much bigger than I did so I'm guessing she weighs 220/230. Simon was right on the money with the weight restrictions. 

It's still below the belt to insult a woman postpartum or to body shame anyone but since it's Kailyn and she's heartless and made fun of that "nappy head" chic then fair game. She doesn't deserve to have people censor themselves. She's cold as ice.

ETA: I'm starting to feel bad now. ?

Damn you Simon for making me feel bad for Kailyn! Even though she's a hosebeast I'm starting to hate that he insulted a postpartum chics weight especially when he could stand to lose some weight.

I hate the double standard. Women gain some weight with child bearing and men run their mouths but they can get away with weighing too much due to eating too much.

ETA: Nope. Go ahead Simon! Keep 'me coming. I can't feel bad for Kailyn as she NEVER feels bad for anyone else. 

*Don't mind the argument I'm having with myself on this...* ?

Kailyn is an awful human being but I hate that when people don't like a woman (for valid or invalid reasons) the first thing people do is call her a slut or talk about her weight.

I'm all for insulting Kailyn for valid reasons (her awful personality and wearing clothes that hurt her labia while thinking they look good- yes I'm still on that), but I'm not going to talk about her weight especially post partum. Being a fat woman isn't a personality flaw- being a hosebeast is. Plus she isn't even big!!! She just dresses awfully and she's post partum, the camera adding weight isn't a myth. I every celeb I've seen in person is far smaller than they look on screen. 

I don't feel bad for her though, this is part of the course as a reality tv star. 

  • Love 8

Can't these fucks afford 2 car seats?  They're like $50. 

Also, single Airman Javi needs two vehicles?  Eye roll. A truck and a Suburban? Ugh. That's why so many servicemembers are in debt.  I hope he maxes out his TSP because I wish I put more in mine while active duty instead of worrying about cars I couldn't even use while deployed. 

Edited by CofCinci
  • Love 6
36 minutes ago, CofCinci said:

Can't these fucks afford 2 car seats?  They're like $50. 

Also, single Airman Javi needs two vehicles?  Eye roll. A truck and a Suburban? Ugh. That's why so many servicemembers are in debt.  I hope he maxes out his TSP because I wish I put more in mine while active duty instead of worrying about cars I couldn't even use while deployed. 

When I think of someone needing a "work truck", I picture a plumber, electrician, contractor etc., who has to haul tools and supplies around and the vehicle is basically their mobile office. I'm not sure why Javi needs a fancy truck along with a huge SUV. I don't know what he does for the Air Force, but surely the Suburban would suffice if he needed to store gear in the back.

Edited by BitterApple
  • Love 8
Quote
Quote

It's still below the belt to insult a woman postpartum or to body shame anyone but since it's Kailyn and she's heartless and made fun of that "nappy head" chic then fair game. She doesn't deserve to have people censor themselves. She's cold as ice.

 

It is an insult towards a normal female. Many of us have had to deal with extra weight post-partum. Kail is getting her karma for all the things she said about others including insulting people for the clothes they wear in the privacy of their own home, racist comments including the need for light-skinned Latino boys to look white, and hurling a slur about a black woman's crown and glory.  Kail has no care for the feelings of others. 

  • Love 12
11 hours ago, SPLAIN said:

Although I agree with your assessment about love and Kail having a strong hold on Javi with regards to how he behaved, I have to strongly disagree there on that bolded point. Jo didn't move to Dover for laughs and kicks. It is a fact he moved there because his time with his son was precious and valuable. He was tired of the 3 hour drives. He wanted to spend that time with his son, not on the road. Jo was late on a few occasions, which can truly happen to the best of parents with the worst of traffic, especially when leaving work and having to deal with a 3 hour commute. In return, the heifer would turn around and then withhold visitation from Jo. We saw her do just that with Javi during the beginning of the season for the same reason - he was not there at the precise hour they agreed upon. People aren't going to speed through traffic or run red lights like this heifer to get where they need to be.

Jo made it clear he would move to the end of the world to where his son was living and that is what made things difficult in Kail's world because she was hoping he would give up and allow her to just go anywhere with the child they share. Jo had a visitation schedule that didn't allow him much time with Isaac. It wasn't what he wanted, but it was what was given to him due to the circumstances that were presented to the court at that time which was he lived in New Jersey and Kail had just moved to Delaware. Kail didn't offer Jo any extra time with Isaac. Now, she is giving him that extra time only because it suits her to have free babysitting on a whim.

I really feel like Kail and her situation appealed to the White Knight in Javi. Everybody has their own internal narrative for their lives, and this was the perfect opportunity for him to rush in and play the hero that saves the damsel from the evil monster (Jo). He didn't give himself a chance to actually get to know Jo as a human being because that would disrupt the story playing out in his head. I can't believe I'm saying this, but Dr. Drew was right about this when he called Kail out for her treatment of Vee. 

  • Love 11
4 hours ago, CofCinci said:

Can't these fucks afford 2 car seats?  They're like $50. 

Also, single Airman Javi needs two vehicles?  Eye roll. A truck and a Suburban? Ugh. That's why so many servicemembers are in debt.  I hope he maxes out his TSP because I wish I put more in mine while active duty instead of worrying about cars I couldn't even use while deployed. 

I'd have to watch the episode to confirm this -  Javi returned home and was in his white truck, the brand new one Kail said was "too small".  Did it have one of those cabs or was it a full back seat? If it was a cab, maybe that is the issue. It isn't big enough for the two kids. Or, is he really saying he drives an air force work truck? Is he allowed to drive a military vehicle for whatever his job is? Back in the days when my spouse was a roofer, he was allowed to drive one of the company trucks home during the week in order to pick up supplies, if he needed to. He didn't always need to, but he was allowed by his employer to drive it anyways. He would also use the company gas card (with permission) which was a great thing to use since it didn't come out of our pockets. 

  • Love 2
1 hour ago, Brooklynista said:

Nah if she was, she wouldn't be in the mess she's in now.

hee hee 

She purposely didn't swallow because she was seeking that trap baby. 

1 hour ago, DangerousMinds said:

Simon is really not in a position to be insulting someone else's weight. Kail just had a baby, what's his excuse?

I seriously can't tell the difference between Kail's pre-pregnancy weight and her post-partum weight. 

  • Love 13
4 minutes ago, luvgoldens said:

Is no one talking about baby name reveal? I don't know how to repost Twitter but there is something on there that says it's "Murphy Nixon". Could this be true??

You're right!

Jesus help poor baby Murf Impeachment.  

http://us.blastingnews.com/showbiz-tv/2017/09/teen-mom-2-kailyn-lowry-finally-reveals-her-baby-boys-name-002007709.amp.html

Article about baby Murf.

  • Love 7
Quote
21 minutes ago, GreatKazu said:

Murphy.

The stupid ass just set up her kid to be called "Murph" as in wedgie.  Coming from the person who has constant labia wedgies with the tight shorts and pants she wears. 

Kids are going to call him Murph the Smurf. Poor kid. She said she had to wait until she had him awhile to see what name "suited" him best. I guess I don't see it.

  • Love 4
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