S05.E10: Drawing The Line

[Caoimhe]

3 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I also found this:

Samoan Sense of Entitlement Explained

WOW.  That does explain the very nasty and entitled Family Asuelu.  Very interesting reading.

42 minutes ago, Gobi said:

From now on, I am going to refer to Druzilla by her proper name: Roadkill.

Dracuzilla. (Lifted from a thread on last night's TOW episode).

Edited August 18, 2020 by ThereButFor
credit where it's due!!

[StatisticalOutlier]

17 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

17 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

Does he really want to come to America that badly?  

He used to.

I've actually been wondering if the U.S.'s current situation might make him re-think the whole thing, especially if it's coming at such a cost.  Normally I'd say, "Run, Michael!"  But instead, I guess it should be, "Stay, Michael!"

 

17 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

Sorry to be so Sister Mary Perfectionata.

Don't apologize!  Facts and accuracy matter, even in discussions about made-up reality TV shows.  Maybe even moreso, since there's certainly a dearth in what we're presented.

 

Quote

Wow, Syngin sure spilled the beans and they were quite telling!  Tania moved in with him uninvited-he was for it as he referenced amazing sex, but she till imposed herself on the roommates. 

The way the guy worded it, it sounded like she moved in with him and his roommates, and that Syngin wasn't one of them.  Which made the whole thing weirder, but not unimaginable, considering it's Tania.

 

4 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I post them to make the point when two vastly different cultures come together in marriage, it's naïve to think one spouse will readily abandon the norms with which they - and every other person they've known their entire lives - have been raised by just because their spouse was raised, and they now live in, a country with a completely different culture. 

Thanks for the research.  But isn't Family Kalani Samoan, too?  They don't appear to be great adherents of any tradition that children participate in the family economy, given what we've seen of her folks providing houses and her not having a job.  But I would think they would at least know of the expectations, and Kalani's acting like she's never heard of such a thing. 

Or maybe "acting" is the key word here.  But if so, Asuelu needs to ditch the yogurt sampling and Samoan dancing gigs and consider trying his hand at professional acting jobs, because I was buying his hurt.

[bravofan27]

Kalani's dad is Samoan, but he ditched the Samoan culture and married into the Mormon culture, which is all-consuming and intensive in terms of commitment, time, resources. It's a lifestyle. When Ansuelu says he wants to be an American man, I think he's talking about following Kalani's dad's example. 

[AZChristian]

15 minutes ago, bravofan27 said:

Kalani's dad is Samoan, but he ditched the Samoan culture and married into the Mormon culture, which is all-consuming and intensive in terms of commitment, time, resources. It's a lifestyle. When Ansuelu says he wants to be an American man, I think he's talking about following Kalani's dad's example. 

And very strong on the teaching that when you marry, you "leave and cleave."  You leave your parents and cleave to your spouse.  

[Hotel Snarker]

On 8/17/2020 at 2:06 AM, nb360 said:

Angela doesn't want a 50/50 relationship. She wants a 70/30 relationship with herself in control. And the aunt said something that I think is significant. She is a white woman from the U.S. What happens when she is in America  -- in the South, Georgia, FFS -- and she insists on being the boss? Don't tell me she's not aware of how much power a white woman has versus a black man, in the American south. There -- I said it. And Angela knows this. 

Honestly, I think Michael deserves a green card for putting up with Angela for 3 years. He’s earned it.

[Hotel Snarker]

Coltee and Jessee and Debbieee: I think everyone in this situation is crazy. Colt is a liar and Debbie pushes buttons.  Then Colt communicates with his "what did I do wrong?" irony.  There is nothing like irony to make a person on the receiving end angry.  Just sayin' - they did the same thing to Larissa. Jess is a crazy and hot blooded Brazilian woman who just wants to be on TV.

Grangela (comes along with bra-purse for totin’ things) and Maaackle: I think Auntie Lydia was wise. She could see Michael’s future with Angela and it’s not good. Angela is the most selfish and nasty woman there is. Michael wasn’t even raising his voice, she always does and he should listen. I think he really wants the green card to be putting up with her. She will destroy him though if that’s the case. 

Poll and Kreenee: They need help.  Karine needs to go home.  Paul needs to stay here.   Get over this mess.

Larissa-ee and Ericee: Their relationship won’t last very long. I think Eric is creepy. There’s just something not quite right and I can’t put my finger on it; he’s hiding something! And Larissa just needs to go back to where she came from. She is all about the money and all she wants to do is go eat lunch or do something to make herself what she thinks is prettier, and she doesn’t give a darn about anything or anybody else.

Libbi & Andrrrrei: There was absolutely no sincerity in that apology. He only apologized so Chuck will pay for the wedding. If I was Chuck I would tell him to pay for his own wedding.

I still can’t stand the Family Potthast. They started that whole thing, it was a pretty nice meal, laughing,  sharing memories.  Then they start running their mouths, telling Elizabeth to shut up, Andrei to shut up, and Jr said first "I'll kick your ****, stood up and ruffled up. With alcohol,  frustration and egos. What would anyone do? Stand up or stay seated? Toe to toe is much better than one sitting down and not braced. Also if Jr was to hit it would be between Elizabeth, she could have got hurt. Jr even kind of chest uped first and tried what looked like slapping or whatever he called it. He was trying to up River.

Libby needs to STOP defending Chuck/Charlie & back him up. They got into his privacy BEFORE Andrei & Libby were even a couple. Back off, Chuck & Charlie - go tag team one of your other in-laws.

And calling Andrei’s parents’ house “the projects” was a rude and disrespectful thing to say.

[CrazyInAlabama]

I really was hoping one of the billy goats would head butt Mama A.     

Edited August 18, 2020 by CrazyInAlabama

[TwirlyGirly]

2 hours ago, StatisticalOutlier said:

Thanks for the research.  But isn't Family Kalani Samoan, too?  They don't appear to be great adherents of any tradition that children participate in the family economy, given what we've seen of her folks providing houses and her not having a job.  But I would think they would at least know of the expectations, and Kalani's acting like she's never heard of such a thing. 

See, I think this is weird, too.

Does anyone know whether Mother Kalani is Samoan? I tried, but I couldn't find anything.

Samoan culture is primarily patriarchal, so perhaps the main burden for providing for the parents falls mainly on the boys in the family? I think Tammy said something to that effect, that because Asuelu is the oldest son he has most of the responsibility for financially supporting his mother. (I think she said that when Asuelu went back to see them w/o Kalani).

But I agree with you; we know Father Kalani (Low) is Samoan and he's familiar with Samoan culture (or should be), so why hasn't he imparted any of that knowledge to his daughters? It's been mentioned several times he didn't want his girls to marry Samoan men, and it would seem Samoan culture might have had something to do with why he felt that way. Perhaps some details would have been helpful to make his case, because right now it seems like "Nevermind WHY. Just DON'T!" is what they got...

Come to think of it, that may have been the sum total of their sex education, too - which explains a lot.

Edited August 18, 2020 by TwirlyGirly

[Chalby]

On 8/12/2020 at 3:53 AM, charmed1 said:

I tried watching the sneak peak, but fell asleep. I thought Tania had the most obnoxious friends, but Syngin’s friends take the cake. 

I like Syngin's friends and I found I learned a lot. Clearly Tania swooped in and took over Syngin's life. Not hard to do given he's an alcoholic and enjoys the simple life where people look after him. Tania wants to mold him into something he isn't, and I doubt he's very employable given he's never had a real job bartending or doing much of anything. He needs to stay in SA and Tania needs to go home.

[lilysmom]

On 8/17/2020 at 12:54 PM, 2dogmom said:

 

Angela was totin a lot in her bra this week, she should create her own line of storage bras and sell them on qvc.

 

Oh, just TOOOO funny!

[Chalby]

2 hours ago, bravofan27 said:

Kalani's dad is Samoan, but he ditched the Samoan culture and married into the Mormon culture, which is all-consuming and intensive in terms of commitment, time, resources. It's a lifestyle. When Ansuelu says he wants to be an American man, I think he's talking about following Kalani's dad's example. 

My brother's wife became Mormon shortly after they married. My brother is agnostic and his new wife knew this so she has never pushed her new beliefs onto him. However, my brother laughs and says Mormon men have it made because the women catered to his every whim. He doesn't mind being the breadwinner because he is treated so well and gets to make any of the decisions for the marriage and future. He did say he would not want any daughter of his to marry a Mormon man, so that tells me everything.

[hoosiermommy]

On 8/17/2020 at 12:51 AM, Splithair said:

While I totally agree on Andrei/Libby, Andrei should have never basically demanded that her dad pay for this second wedding.  In the beginning when he still had savings left, he acted all proud and like he wouldn't accept her dad's help for anything ever, and once that changed and he put his hand out, he shouldn't be surprised that her dad thinks he has the right to be in his business 

I like Andrei but he's got some weird entitlement issues he needs to work on.

Oh, and Libby's brother can shut all the way up. 

ITTA...if you ask for money, you are inviting the lender into your life. Want to be independent and not beholden? Be independent and not beholden.

No matter how much Libby protests, O think she likes being the center of this arguing. She gets all the attention when before Andrei, I get the sense she was always battling the coven for anyone’s attention. Now, look, all eyes are on her.

[Chalby]

21 hours ago, Mothra said:

I have a feeling that if he were to quit the show and go for help at a social-services agency, his mother (and perhaps Father) would be willing to help him.

I think his Mom is over Paul's insistence on trying to earn money the easy way, or the illegal way, or whatever. The fact that he even is subjecting 2 dogs, a wife and baby to his fresh hell annoys me. The best thing for Paul would be if Karine went home with baby and mom cut him off completely. He needs to get a life and quit sponging off of everyone while making up excuses as to why he is so useless.

[Kath94]

On 8/17/2020 at 2:44 PM, charmed1 said:

I think the more important point that Aunt Lydia  made is that she was “scared” for Michael. She was probably going along with the shit show until she witnessed first hand the true behavior of the lovely American patriot sitting before her. Cameras or no cameras, I think that night, Lydia was genuinely concerned for Michael’s safety and free will. And rightly so.

I agree with Aunt Lydia's fear.  Pole managed to get Kreeny to the U.S.A. under, if she is to be believed, false pretenses.  It was to "see if she liked it" but now it looks like she is here permanently or if she can figure out a way to get home, will most likely have to leave Pierre behind.  Michael is in a MUCH better situation knowing the language, but it will be very foreign to him in rural Georgia.  He will find it VERY different from his expectations, and Grangela WILL be his boss.

On 8/17/2020 at 4:05 PM, Dobian said:

I think she is suffering from postPoleUm depression.

I added a "LOL" emoji to this, but then thought I'd better clarify.  Not laughing at her situation or depression.  Just the expression "postPoleUm" depression."

Edited August 19, 2020 by Kath94

[bravofan27]

Paul-- "We need to move to the US where I can make money." = "We can get welfare." I don't think Paul is going to get a job because he is getting gov assistance with him and his two dependents. Food stamps don't pay for dog food, which I'm thinking is why Paul needed his mom for that.

 

[Kayz Opinion]

13 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I wish Kalani would consider this every time she berates Asuelu for his beliefs, and remember Samoans feel just as strongly the way they do things is the "right" way to do them just as we Americans believe they way we do things is the "right" way.

(My bolding).  I wish she would say the same things in front of her father ... or ask him for advice on all the things that are disappointing about Asuelu.  He might be able to help her understand at least a little.  Also, I think Asuelu will not ever be able to be the husband and father Kalani and her family expect.  It's just not in him.  He's a sweet "boy" who should never have left his home.

[Iguessnot]

7 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

See, I think this is weird, too.

Does anyone know whether Mother Kalani is Samoan? I tried, but I couldn't find anything.

Samoan culture is primarily patriarchal, so perhaps the main burden for providing for the parents falls mainly on the boys in the family? I think Tammy said something to that effect, that because Asuelu is the oldest son he has most of the responsibility for financially supporting his mother. (I think she said that when Asuelu went back to see them w/o Kalani).

But I agree with you; we know Father Kalani (Low) is Samoan and he's familiar with Samoan culture (or should be), so why hasn't he imparted any of that knowledge to his daughters? It's been mentioned several times he didn't want his girls to marry Samoan men, and it would seem Samoan culture might have had something to do with why he felt that way. Perhaps some details would have been helpful to make his case, because right now it seems like "Nevermind WHY. Just DON'T!" is what they got...

Come to think of it, that may have been the sum total of their sex education, too - which explains a lot.

I have the feeling Mom Kalani is not Samoan, but it's not based of any particular knowledge. If the article a fair representation of Samoan culture, it sheds a lot of light on things. The structure where adults retire at a prime age, expect to be fully catered to and find work shameful, is not exactly a winning formula for success in an industrialized society. It also gives us a clearer picture of Low's objection to his daughter marrying a Samoan. 

[lilysmom]

On 8/17/2020 at 5:16 PM, Kid said:

 

I do have to give Angela one point, however. When the aunt is not around he agrees to everything Angela says and when the aunt  is there, he grows a pair.

IIRC, Michael said at one point that he just agrees with whatever Angela says (no matter how ridiculous or demanding or wrong it is) just to avoid arguing with her and having her fly off the handle. I could be wrong! It's been a long story arc.

Edited August 19, 2020 by lilysmom

[Kayz Opinion]

3 hours ago, lilysmom said:

IIRC, Michael said at one point that he just agrees with whatever Angela says (no matter how ridiculous or demanding or wrong it is) just to avoid arguing with her and having her fly off the handle.

I agree.  Wouldn't anyone?  She has gone through life SCREECHING, THREATENING, BULLYING.  Eventually she wears down everyone.  If I had a store in town and saw her coming, I'd flip out that CLOSED sign and pull down the shades!

11 hours ago, Iguessnot said:

I have the feeling Mom Kalani is not Samoan, but it's not based of any particular knowledge.

I have forgotten her name, but I saw her on Etsy and Pinterest.  A picture was there so I know it's her.  It gave a first, middle, and last (Fagaata) names...and the middle name sounded like an "American" surname.  I think she's probably a Utah-born Mormon woman.

[Gobi]

21 hours ago, Hotel Snarker said:

Libbi & Andrrrrei: There was absolutely no sincerity in that apology. He only apologized so Chuck will pay for the wedding. If I was Chuck I would tell him to pay for his own wedding.

I still can’t stand the Family Potthast. They started that whole thing, it was a pretty nice meal, laughing,  sharing memories.  Then they start running their mouths, telling Elizabeth to shut up, Andrei to shut up, and Jr said first "I'll kick your ****, stood up and ruffled up. With alcohol,  frustration and egos. What would anyone do? Stand up or stay seated? Toe to toe is much better than one sitting down and not braced. Also if Jr was to hit it would be between Elizabeth, she could have got hurt. Jr even kind of chest uped first and tried what looked like slapping or whatever he called it. He was trying to up River.

Libby needs to STOP defending Chuck/Charlie & back him up. They got into his privacy BEFORE Andrei & Libby were even a couple. Back off, Chuck & Charlie - go tag team one of your other in-laws.

And calling Andrei’s parents’ house “the projects” was a rude and disrespectful thing to say.

If Chuck had some concerns about Andreiii's past, a dinner party with friends at a restaurant was not the time or place to bring them up. He should have had a private man-to-man conversation with him.

Most importantly, he should have done it before Andreiii and Libbi were married.

[charmed1]

14 hours ago, Iguessnot said:

I have the feeling Mom Kalani is not Samoan, but it's not based of any particular knowledge. If the article a fair representation of Samoan culture, it sheds a lot of light on things. The structure where adults retire at a prime age, expect to be fully catered to and find work shameful, is not exactly a winning formula for success in an industrialized society. It also gives us a clearer picture of Low's objection to his daughter marrying a Samoan. 

Asuelo said that Kalani being “white” was one of the reasons he was attracted to her. Obviously, referring to his wife as “white” is absurd as she is clearly a woman of color and her father is Samoan-born, but perhaps Asuelo is ignoring that and only acknowledging Kalani’s mother. He’s also really stupid, so there’s that. However, I’m aware that some cultures conflate “whiteness” with socio-economic status and Mother Asuelo believes Kalani’s family to be well-off. 

[Neurochick]

Kalani's dad said during his introduction on the show that he didn't want his daughters to marry Samoan men.  He wanted them to marry white men.  I assumed then that he'd married a white woman.  

[Iguessnot]

1 hour ago, charmed1 said:

Asuelo said that Kalani being “white” was one of the reasons he was attracted to her. Obviously, referring to his wife as “white” is absurd as she is clearly a woman of color and her father is Samoan-born, but perhaps Asuelo is ignoring that and only acknowledging Kalani’s mother. He’s also really stupid, so there’s that. However, I’m aware that some cultures conflate “whiteness” with socio-economic status and Mother Asuelo believes Kalani’s family to be well-off. 

Despite colorism issues, color does not equate to culture. That's why the sister keeps referring to Asuelo marrying an American. Despite her ethnic background, she are her family are not following the Samoan culture,  thus just an American family, or 'white" in Asuelo's view.

Edited August 19, 2020 by Iguessnot

[Mrs. Hanson]

23 hours ago, Chalby said:

I think his Mom is over Paul's insistence on trying to earn money the easy way, or the illegal way, or whatever. The fact that he even is subjecting 2 dogs, a wife and baby to his fresh hell annoys me. The best thing for Paul would be if Karine went home with baby and mom cut him off completely. He needs to get a life and quit sponging off of everyone while making up excuses as to why he is so useless.

I actually looked it up, and Louisville has "Felon Friendly" jobsites, Amazon was listed.  (Can school please start so I don't have time to look this stuff up??)  $15 and hour - he could clear, depending on a lot of factors, $1800 - $2000 a month.  Not sure about insurance but I believe every state has a medical coverage program for infants.  WIC is another great program.  Why do I care?

And can we all full on stop with the "Let's talk about all our dirty laundry IN FRONT OF OUR FAMILES AT DINNER" please??

[ethalfrida]

Angela threatened physical violence on Michael. She said she would give him an ass whipping. 

Jess cracked me up throwing that shoe. She was so dead on you know she knows about La Chancla!

 

[Kayz Opinion]

3 hours ago, charmed1 said:

He’s also really stupid, so there’s that. 

I don't think he's "stupid," or maybe it just sounds so mean.

[John M]

On 8/17/2020 at 12:28 PM, KateHearts said:

I've always known it to be a man caring for another man's child. So yeah that doesn't fit.

OK, as a younger person I am afraid I am going to have to explain this, perhaps in too much detail…

"Cuck" is a sexual fetish term that has enter the popular zeitgeist fairly recently. It's basically a patriarchal submissive fetish based on the male partner of a woman being sexual aroused by being the submissive partner of a woman. This is, like all fetishes, is often expressed more popularly in extremes. It's anywhere from the male partner knowing that the woman is openly cheating on him with other partners but being unwilling to raise objections that they feel obligated to express, to watching their female partner have sex with other partners in front of them "unwillingly", to extreme versions of being “forced” to perform sex acts on other men "unwillingly" at the orders of their female partner, the ultimate transgression of male dominance over women. Often protest is part of it, it is the transgression of traditional gender roles that is the point, the enjoyment of it is that you don’t feel you should comfortable with it. I actually know a couple kind of like this, although the husband is admittedly bisexual,  his wife takes him to gay bars and picks out men that she is attracted to, not ones that he is, and his submissive role in the relationship is to engage in submissive sexual intercourse with them while she watches and directs. If that all sounds very weird, and as a sexually adventurous gay male even I was taken aback when they first explained their relationship to me, that’s the point.

Like all dom/sub relationships abuse is never OK, I personally think Ang is abusive, but we don’t know everything.

So, yeah, he might actually like this, and his objections might be part of it given the transgressive nature of it in his culture. A young Nigerian man marrying to be the submissive partner to an older white woman that can’t give him children? What a slap in the face to traditional Nigerian culture.

[1011101010001]

2 hours ago, John M said:

OK, as a younger person I am afraid I am going to have to explain this, perhaps in too much detail…

"Cuck" is a sexual fetish term that has enter the popular zeitgeist fairly recently. It's basically a patriarchal submissive fetish based on the male partner of a woman being sexual aroused by being the submissive partner of a woman. This is, like all fetishes, is often expressed more popularly in extremes. It's anywhere from the male partner knowing that the woman is openly cheating on him with other partners but being unwilling to raise objections that they feel obligated to express, to watching their female partner have sex with other partners in front of them "unwillingly", to extreme versions of being “forced” to perform sex acts on other men "unwillingly" at the orders of their female partner, the ultimate transgression of male dominance over women. Often protest is part of it, it is the transgression of traditional gender roles that is the point, the enjoyment of it is that you don’t feel you should comfortable with it. I actually know a couple kind of like this, although the husband is admittedly bisexual,  his wife takes him to gay bars and picks out men that she is attracted to, not ones that he is, and his submissive role in the relationship is to engage in submissive sexual intercourse with them while she watches and directs. If that all sounds very weird, and as a sexually adventurous gay male even I was taken aback when they first explained their relationship to me, that’s the point.

Like all dom/sub relationships abuse is never OK, I personally think Ang is abusive, but we don’t know everything.

So, yeah, he might actually like this, and his objections might be part of it given the transgressive nature of it in his culture. A young Nigerian man marrying to be the submissive partner to an older white woman that can’t give him children? What a slap in the face to traditional Nigerian culture.

I tried explaining this but it got deleted.  I suppose it’s too off topic.

[John M]

33 minutes ago, MrBuhBye said:

I tried explaining this but it got deleted.  I suppose it’s too off topic.

Hmp. Well, I personally think it seems very relevant to explaining why a young man in a culture that expects women to be submissive to their husband would be so fixated on being in a relationship with a controlling older woman that can not give him the children expected of him. Oh well.

[mamadrama]

On 8/18/2020 at 8:47 PM, bravofan27 said:

Paul-- "We need to move to the US where I can make money." = "We can get welfare." I don't think Paul is going to get a job because he is getting gov assistance with him and his two dependents. Food stamps don't pay for dog food, which I'm thinking is why Paul needed his mom for that.

 

Kentuckian here and former social worker. They might qualify for SNAP benefits, but unless he's getting social security for one of his (possible) mental health illnesses they wouldn't qualify for anything else other than Medicaid-and that's because our state took on Expanded Medicaid through Obamacare. What people generally think of as "welfare," sitting on your ass and drawing money every month, no longer exists. Instead, KY has the TANF program for people with kids. It's very difficult to get, they most likely don't qualify for enough to live on, and you can't draw it forever. It also effects the amount of Food Stamps you can get. (You'll get less if you draw TANF.) I live in the poor part of the state and the unemployed people I know who receive TANF are barely scraping by-and the Louisville metro area is 3x more expensive. They may qualify for Section 8, but there's a 2 year wait list. Food Stamps are based on family size and income. Karine may not count because she's a permanent resident and not a citizen. Although PRs can technically get them, it is HIGHLY recommended that they stay off the application because it can work against them if they choose to become a citizen down the road. 

If he moved back because he honestly thought that he could draw enough government assistance to provide for his family then he's ignorant. 15-20 years ago, maybe, but not now. The only real benefit is the Medicaid. 

Edited August 20, 2020 by mamadrama

[Kayz Opinion]

39 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

but unless he's getting social security for one of his (possible) mental health illnesses they wouldn't qualify for anything else other than

If he was collecting Social Security Disability Insurance, it's unclear whether he could continue collecting it in Brazil.  If he could NOT, he would go through a lot of paperwork hell to try to qualify again.

40 minutes ago, mamadrama said:

If he moved back because he honestly thought that he could draw enough government assistance to provide for his family then he's ignorant. 15-20 years ago, maybe, but not now

He's ignorant, but wiley in the ways of manipulating. When he's persistent bucking the system, he seems to come out okay (by his standards).  I wonder who in heck ever found him for this show.  Probably someone who wanted him out of their little town.

[mamadrama]

34 minutes ago, Kayz Opinion said:

If he was collecting Social Security Disability Insurance, it's unclear whether he could continue collecting it in Brazil.  If he could NOT, he would go through a lot of paperwork hell to try to qualify again.

He's ignorant, but wiley in the ways of manipulating. When he's persistent bucking the system, he seems to come out okay (by his standards).  I wonder who in heck ever found him for this show.  Probably someone who wanted him out of their little town.

I have no idea if he draws disability or even if he has one. I was just using that as an example.

[Johannah]

On 8/18/2020 at 6:25 PM, hoosiermommy said:

ITTA...if you ask for money, you are inviting the lender into your life. Want to be independent and not beholden? Be independent and not beholden.

I agree to a point.  If you borrow from a bank, then the bank is only entitled to information pertaining to the loan and your ability to pay it back.  If you borrow from a friend or relative, then, yeah, they can want more information like "why did I have to help you pay your rent, and now you can afford a sports car?" But not information about other unrelated things like "why did you move 10 years ago and 'things change' is not an answer I'll accept."  Loaning or giving money doesn't entitle the giver unencumbered access to the recipients life.

[Kayz Opinion]

4 minutes ago, Johann said:

If you borrow from a friend or relative, then, yeah, they can want more information like "why did I have to help you pay your rent, and now you can afford a sports car?"

OHHHHhhhh.....so if my 40-year-old niece asks (again) to borrow money, I CAN say, "How come YOU can use your food stamps at Costco for "prime" meat, get your hair done different colors 2-3 times a month, get fancy manicures and pedicures--none of which I can afford, yet you ask me for money again?  This will be loan number four...after you pay me the previous three.  Like that?

[2dogmom]

38 minutes ago, Kayz Opinion said:

OHHHHhhhh.....so if my 40-year-old niece asks (again) to borrow money, I CAN say, "How come YOU can use your food stamps at Costco for "prime" meat, get your hair done different colors 2-3 times a month, get fancy manicures and pedicures--none of which I can afford, yet you ask me for money again?  This will be loan number four...after you pay me the previous three.  Like that?

 what a disappointment. I can't imagine ever asking my aunt for a loan. 

 

[Mr. Miner]

I think Angela is a niche fetish for Michael. He likes totally repulsive, vomit inducing, trash bag women from GA.

[AZChristian]

48 minutes ago, Kayz Opinion said:

OHHHHhhhh.....so if my 40-year-old niece asks (again) to borrow money, I CAN say, "How come YOU can use your food stamps at Costco for "prime" meat, get your hair done different colors 2-3 times a month, get fancy manicures and pedicures--none of which I can afford, yet you ask me for money again?  This will be loan number four...after you pay me the previous three.  Like that?

Safe yourself some time.  Repeat 100 times until it feels natural.  "No."

Actually, when I've been asked to do something I don't want to do, I put a big happy smile on my face and say, "Um, no . . . but thanks for asking!"  Then I turn away from the asker.

They're usually so taken aback that they go away and leave me alone.

[2dogmom]

^ that was my father's favorite phrase, I learned early not to ask for things...and to figure it out on my own. we've done very well for ourselves on our own, and am proud to say we have never had our hands out to my very successful parents. gifts are gifts, but I have never asked for a loan.

 

Edited August 20, 2020 by 2dogmom

[Gobi]

47 minutes ago, Mr. Miner said:

I think Angela is a niche fetish for Michael. He likes totally repulsive, vomit inducing, trash bag women from GA.

With ample storage capacity in their bras.

[Cementhead]

never mind, oops me

Edited August 20, 2020 by Cementhead

[Rt66vintage]

On 8/17/2020 at 1:25 PM, RealReality said:

I like Larissa and find her entertaining, but even I think her storyline is stale and old.  Eric (spelled E-R-I-C for those of you who remember that cringey clip) is a dud and clearly desperate for 15 minutes of fame.  

Larissa's storyline should have involved her getting an interesting job.  Cocktail waitress, doing hair and nails for showgirls, modelling cars for rich dudes, finding a sugar daddy. I think that would bring together the most tawdry and interesting parts of Vegas. 

So far all we've seen of Vegas are colt and Debbie. Colts tract home and 15 year old car without AC and Larissa getting lip injections.  .

 

The closest we've gotten to a casino is Debbies creepy in home slot machine. The closest we've gotten a a sumptuous buffet is Debbie's beef stew.  

Where is all the decadent Las Vegas glitz and glamour?  That's the world that would be fun to see and I think that Larissa could be the person to show that.  

 

 

ITA! I've long said Larissa would/could do so much more for herself by working in a nice casino. It'd be interesting to hear from an experienced hospitality person on this site to tell us how and what entry level casino job Larissa might be able to perform. I know there are ?mandatory classes for dealers, so there are probably classes in hostessing, bartending and maid services. Probably at the junior college even. Larissa is not hard on the eyes when she's got her face on, god help us if she shows up in her depressive look.

And @RealReality, I love your idea of showing us the glitzy nightlife and people of Las Vegas. I'd even be happy to see the beautiful surrounding area outside of LV. Hopefully TPTB read your post and consider giving us a little better than Larissa & Eric being boring and ugly. 

[Johannah]

2 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

OHHHHhhhh.....so if my 40-year-old niece asks (again) to borrow money, I CAN say, "How come YOU can use your food stamps at Costco for "prime" meat, get your hair done different colors 2-3 times a month, get fancy manicures and pedicures--none of which I can afford, yet you ask me for money again?  This will be loan number four...after you pay me the previous three.  Like that?

Yes.

[CrazyInAlabama]

Would a casino hire someone with Larissa's criminal convictions?   

[1011101010001]

1 minute ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

Would a casino hire someone with Larissa's criminal convictions?   

I would think with all the drunk patrons employees would need to be patient, calm, and even-tempered.  Not a good fit.

[HelloOutThere]

I’m way late to this party but just wanted to share a few thoughts:

- I found Synergy’s (autocorrected and leaving it) friends hilarious! Took me right back to my college frat house days. The bit where they started chanting “Married man! Married man! MARRIED MAN!” with the wee mustachioed one pounding on the table in rhythm was gold! That, my friends, is getting TURNT UP. 

- When Syngyn was taking about the great sex he has with Tania 🤢, anyone else hear the wee mustachioed one squeak out an “I know...I was right there!” Poor kid. No wonder he drinks so much. 

- Anyone else get Robin Williams vibes from Syngyn? Specifically Robins Williams in Mrs. Doubtfire. I can just see him bellowing “Help is on the way, dear!!!” after shoving his face in a cake. 

- Finally, I think TLC is saving pennies and having the same person play both Lo and Mom Asuelo. Have we seen them in the same room together? 😉 

[Scout Finch]

Andrei can't punch Charlie!

...until after I've taken my turn.

[John M]

On 8/20/2020 at 12:32 PM, Kayz Opinion said:

OHHHHhhhh.....so if my 40-year-old niece asks (again) to borrow money, I CAN say, "How come YOU can use your food stamps at Costco for "prime" meat, get your hair done different colors 2-3 times a month, get fancy manicures and pedicures--none of which I can afford, yet you ask me for money again?  This will be loan number four...after you pay me the previous three.  Like that?

One of the most important life lessons I have ever learned is never "loan" anything, ANYTHING. Money, a piece of Tupperware, a car, a hoodie, cocaine, lunch money to a co-worker, ANYTHING. There are stores, banks, rental car companies, credit cards, they have other options unless they have been deemed untrustworthy already.

Gift, absolutely! I am more than happy to pick up a co-workers lunch, or give someone a tool, or an old Apple Watch, but it is gone. If they value your friendship and they are a trustworthy friend/relative they will return the gift, the actual gift or pick up your lunch, or a cash gift in return of the same amount but it is a gift. Funny side effect is most people seem to feel much worse about accepting a gift, loans seem like a much smaller ask because they express their intention to repay, even if they aren't going to. 

Edited August 22, 2020 by John M

[Kayz Opinion]

4 hours ago, CrazyInAlabama said:

Would a casino hire someone with Larissa's criminal convictions?   

"Prolly" not.   Small potatoes.  

[hoosiermommy]

On 8/20/2020 at 1:25 PM, Johann said:

I agree to a point.  If you borrow from a bank, then the bank is only entitled to information pertaining to the loan and your ability to pay it back.  If you borrow from a friend or relative, then, yeah, they can want more information like "why did I have to help you pay your rent, and now you can afford a sports car?" But not information about other unrelated things like "why did you move 10 years ago and 'things change' is not an answer I'll accept."  Loaning or giving money doesn't entitle the giver unencumbered access to the recipients life.

Well, banks are in it to make money. They aren’t really interested in your personal life as long as you make payments. If Andrei and Libby wanted that kind of transaction, they should have borrowed from a bank. Every other institution that give you money (friends, family, the mob, the other mob—the government) use money as power and your indebtedness as leverage.

Chuck and Charlie are jerks. They’d have less power over Andrei if Andrei hadn’t taken their money. Sadly, Andrei is just now realizing this.

If I were Chuck, my check and myself, would be on the next plane back to ‘Merica. I wouldn’t give money to someone who treated me so shabbily. 
 

And this is also not excusing the ugliness and smugness and general obnoxiousness of father and son.

[Dixiesoul]

On 8/17/2020 at 12:12 AM, Medsed said:

The situation with Andrei and Libby really bugged me.  I always feel that in a relationship each person is responsible for drawing Boundaries with their own family.. Andrei was not as polite and kind as he could have been, he was drunk, he was angry, he was tired of being interrogated and treated poorly by these people.  Libby’s family instigated this, they were rude at that meal, they have been snobby and rude for NO REASON and really have been the whole time.  Andrei should apologize for overreacting and for getting too drunk and for not being a gracious host.

BUt...Libby’s family are the epitome of the ugly Americans that are truly embarrassing.

Also, after they’ve been married a couple of years and have a child it’s a little too late to think that if she backs out of the second wedding, or they somehow stall or in some way mess up this second wedding that the first one will be less binding, significant or whatever....I just think that while Andrei is not correct it is 100% Libby’s responsibility to tell her family that their rude behavior and the condescending comments stop now.  These people truly believe that no one can be happy or have a good life if they aren’t American....or something...it’s just an awful look formUS citizens to act like that.

 

Asuelu’s family.....just cut ties son...just walk away...when they want to be respectful to your wife and caring about your children start a new dialogue. Until that time..see ya later...

 

did I see Pole sort of run....yay. The only thing I ever need to see from this coupling.  There are so many issues.  That baby needs to get far far away from all of them...ALL OF THEM

COltee and company..fake as Larissas lying face.  She should be deported. Debbie should move to a retirement condo. Coltee should get lots of counseling. Eric should go back to pumping gas or waiting tables or whatever wanna be actors do...he’s not good at this craft..,and never will be. Jess is a mess...the whole situation is just overacted, fake and stupideeee......oh, and fake...did I mention it’s all so fake?!?!?!

Angela is brazen and honest and all kinds of things...if he wants her he can have her...but can we move on. It’s the same every time. He says please don’t yell..she bellows...he looks defeated.  She is as red as a beet...repeat.......

 

I forgot Tania and Syngin...for the love of god..stay there..keep her there too if you can (we don’t really want her)  but he should stay there.  He’s not happy here. He’s not ready to be married. 

I don't post here, but I'm tired of the "ugly American thing". I don't see where any of these other families are much better either.