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S09.E07: Where Is My Husband?


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(edited)

Wow. Big E just completely messed up that bonding opportunity Jamie was offering. He wants her to believe in him and his oath, and she responds by cursing and telling him he's ruining her evening? 

She doesn't understand that talking can enhance ttheir intimacy; instead, she mocks him by "talk, talk, talk, talk, ...."

And then the insult about his lovemaking? That might not be an easy road to recovery, Red.

ETA: WTH?! First my TV Guide just calls the show tonight "Lifetime programming" and splits it into three parts, and now it stopped recording while Amber is still crying! 

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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Liz was pissed because the truth hurts. She can’t cut it at a real job. And getting a job offer after every interview? Are we talking about Subway? 

Deflection thy name is Elizabeth. 

Oh gawd, watching Amber was giving me anxiety. I can completely understand why every guy left her. She is so emotionally immature and clingy. This is going to end badly for her. Again. 

Iris, girl, get over yourself.  Keith was very noncommittal about them staying together on Unfiltered. 

Pooping together is not a necessary bonding experience in a marriage. I would love to have my own bathroom. 

Deonna and Greg looked very happy at his birthday party. Sounds like a little petting over the clothes might happen. 

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

I didn't see Greg as pushing though.  He did ask if there was a middle ground they could agree on.  To me it sounded like he was up for some petting, but not full on intercourse.  At one point it sounded like she agreed, then in the next minute or so it sounded like she didn't even want that.  So I think Greg was confused.

Have they even kissed yet?

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1 hour ago, Suzy Rhapsody said:

Ugh, Jamie and Elizabeth are so basic.  I don’t think I could spend 10 consecutive minutes in their company.  

He reminds me of Jerry Seinfeld.

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(edited)

Hold the phone....Potty mouth Beth lied on her MAFS application and put down accounts executive for her occupation because she “aspires” to be one at JealousDaddy’s business...

Jamie is turning out to be a “Dave” and unlike Dallas Amber who didn’t deserve her husband’s distain, BrassyRed is exposed by Jamie as an insufferable, coddled under achiever propped up artificially and financially by her CreepyDaddy..... 

Edited by humbleopinion
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1 hour ago, Straycat80 said:

Really Matt? Why did you want to get married! 

He wanted a hot looking wife who wasn’t a nag and attached to his hip.  She is too needy and demanding.  No man wants that.

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26 minutes ago, ShowFan said:

I can’t agree more. I’d be extremely annoyed. And yes, i am a bad hostess. Thank goodness so is my husband and don’t even get me started on our dog. So we don’t ever have anyone come. But Iris chose to be on a show and will have to tolerate crap like that or risk looking like a jerk. 

Repulsed and dead inside 🙂 just saying 

I guess I’m a bad hostess as well 💁🏾. Lol I stand corrected.

26 minutes ago, ShowFan said:

It’s disgusting. Agreed 

His creepy comment about half her heart still belonging to him was just disgusting. 

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I just want one season where all the matches at least sense. They may not work out but at least I could understand them.

I also think the final applicants need more vetting. Talk to family and friends beforehand. Dig for some dirt. These people are basically applying for a job which means they will lie as much as they have to.

I get the lemonade thing. Unless you are my parents, I don't like people running up in my fridge. Honestly, I usual eat and drink before I go to people's places. I don't like eating up people's groceries. A party is different but even then I would eat or drink what is out.

At the same time, address the issue afterwards with Keith. They didn't know and it's your first time altogether. No need for the drama.

7 minutes ago, Gem 10 said:

He wanted a hot looking wife who wasn’t a nag and attached to his hip.  She is too needy and demanding.  No man wants that.

As a extremely tall, good looking ball player, he could have found that on his own. This is his own fault.

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Okay, this is driving me nuts. Next time MAFS films in a chocolate city and casts dark skinned couples, they need to hire someone who does the lighting on Insecure. I'm sick of Deonna and Greg looking like an oil slick in their talking heads. It's not fair to them uggggggggggggh! 

I'm surprised Deonna is a former freak. I was definitely thinking she was a born-again virgin who didn't talk about it all the time.

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

I didn't see Greg as pushing though.  He did ask if there was a middle ground they could agree on.  To me it sounded like he was up for some petting, but not full on intercourse.  At one point it sounded like she agreed, then in the next minute or so it sounded like she didn't even want that.  So I think Greg was confused.

Yes.  Greg was confused and so was I.  The way they were speaking. It seemed there would be a little kissing or something, but nothing.

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1 hour ago, Ohwell said:

Yes, he did say that but at one point in their conversation she gave the impression that she was ready for it.  Then she wasn't because "past past past."  If she keeps bringing up her past, I think Greg will get sick of it.   

I don’t remember her even having a past.  What is she talking about?  She is very vague.

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Did Elizabeth really have "Elizabeth" tattooed on her foot?

I swear I saw it when she was sitting on the couch with her shoes on the furniture. (UGH, who does that?)

I know Matt made made his tattoo artist a millionaire, but I think she is a close second!

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3 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Amber - "Maybe I'll let him"  - in using the other bathroom. Controlling much?  Calm down. And wash your hair...

As if she could control him at all. Her hair is such a sad mess. 

2 hours ago, gonecrackers said:

Amber & her twin-I feel like I'm watching two 12 year olds talking.

I swore they were doing some sort of twin talk. 

1 hour ago, ShowFan said:

The chatter between Amber and her twin was just too much. Like they are using some secret high speed language. The chipmunk comparison is genius

It didn’t even sound like English at times. 

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(edited)

Jamie was an ass to E over the questions she was asking but he mentioned that they’d talked about his parent’s divorce before and she knew it was a sore spot for him. I don’t buy that she was entirely innocent. 

She was upset earlier about his mom asking about her job (I though Mom only asked two questions) and I really think she was digging at Jamie on purpose. So he then gets bitchy about her (lack of) job and it all went to hell. Her comment about sex crossed a line I don’t think they can come back from. 

ETA: I just remembered that she’s been bragging about how GREAT their sex life is and then she complained to him about the frequency and quality. 😂😂

Edited by Soup333
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(edited)

It stuck out to me that the two white women have already slept with their husbands. The two black women have not. They also always seem to be slower in terms of getting busy on this show. It just stuck out to me when the women were having their discussion.

There is nothing wrong with taking things slow but this show is like exact opposite of that so it's always hard to watch people attack this like they are going on first dates for weeks and weeks. 

Edited by Racj82
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Seems to me that Matt is an ass and Amber is a greasy clinger. I think Matt could be offered a basketball job in Tiny Spit, NoInternetStan and he would knock people down to take the job. Did he just need a place to stay in between jobs and thought, hey a temporary marriage is the way to go? 

Beth and Jamie? Ick. She is hard to take even when fast forwarded. And I don’t buy his spiel about being glad she’s helping stretch his boundaries. I think Mr. Picky wanted a wife but was perpetually unsatisfied with the women willing to talk to him so he tried a reality tv show. Sucks for him that he got the crazy lady who “works” for her dad who happens to be weirdly obsessed with her. Which, yet again, ick! 

I am Team Iris in the lemonade kerfuffle.  I’m generally willing to share whatever I have with friends but freaking ask me first before rummaging around. How bad is it that I thought, upon hearing about Keith’s grandma, that the situation could be an incredibly bonding time for them and could impact their chance of success? 

In my opinion Deonna and Greg are keeping quite a lot of their quality conversations off screen. They seem to like each other a lot and be growing closer. She also seemed much more open to the thought of sexy times after the friend party. I’m hopeful for them. 

Finally let me add an additional  “Wha?!” to the basic caucasian sex thing. Does she mean missionary? He doesn’t use his mouth or hands? He follows a laminated set of directions he keeps by the bed? Inquiring minds and such. I also am now wondering if she read 50 Shades as high literature. 

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2 hours ago, spunky said:

I’m with Iris 100%. It was disrespectful of Keith’s friends to walk into their home and take whatever they felt like out of the fridge. It Keith allowed them to do that when he was single, that’s fine. He’s married now and they need to respect boundaries. Like Iris I would never dream of entering any of my friends homes and just taking whatever I want, because I was raised to respect other people’s space. 

It's not ready living and sharing with someone else. I think it is good they had this conversation. Marriage is all about compromising and finding common ground. I've been married over 30 years and my husband and I have had dozens (maybe hundreds) of different issues, some small, some big, like this come up, especially in the early years. It's healthy to work through these issues. Ultimately, it makes the relationship stronger. It would be far worse for Iris to keep quite and seethe and resent Keith and his friends.

Personally, I agree with Iris. I don't want people rummaging in my fridge. But there is no right answer. They have to find a resolution together. Maybe Iris learns to accept that some friends will help themselves to the lemonade without asking. Maybe Keith will tell his friends to ask before helping themselves. Maybe they can find a different solution.  The important thing is that they communicate. Disagreements are a normal part of a long term healthy marriage.

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(edited)
3 hours ago, LennieBriscoe said:

Wow. Big E just completely messed up that bonding opportunity Jamie was offering. He wants her to believe in him and his oath, and she responds by cursing and telling him he's ruining her evening? 

Producers fucking with us. Those two arguments were nowhere near in the same timeframe - both daylight but totally different clothes for both and hair/makeup for Elizabeth. Jamie's extremely mean and unrelenting attack in the first argument was hand waved as "I told her my parent's divorce was painful." Which he then took as a free license to attack her about her education and career.

And so much was edited in the second argument that Elizabeth's responses came across as completely unrelated to what he was saying. It made her seem unhinged when really I think she's just nutballs and high strong. These two are an awful "match."

53 minutes ago, ramble said:

How bad is it that I thought, upon hearing about Keith’s grandma, that the situation could be an incredibly bonding time for them and could impact their chance of success? 

In my opinion Deonna and Greg are keeping quite a lot of their quality conversations off screen. They seem to like each other a lot and be growing closer. She also seemed much more open to the thought of sexy times after the friend party. I’m hopeful for them. 

Producers also fucking with the timelines with Keith's grandma's illness. There was an overdub when Keith said "I've only known her '2 weeks' and she's supporting me in this." Only reason to dub it, is it had been longer than 2 weeks. Which means the party also happened later. Why do that?

ITA that Deonna and Greg's deep convos are happening off screen. They are clearly progressing.  Easily my favorite couple.

30 minutes ago, Ilovepie said:

 I like Iris and Keith, but I think she was being ridiculous. What would she have said if they had asked permission first to have some lemonade? Would she have told them no? What an ungracious hostess! Still, it’s pretty dumb. I still hope they work out. She was sweetly sensitive with his family, and her mother is a delight

Greg and Deonna ftw this week. It looks like they might make it work! I really hope they do, but she’s wrong about Sandy - that dog loooooved all those guys! And I love Sandy. Maybe even more than Henry. One last thing: what the hell is “situationship”? Do people actually use that as a real word? She just meant a hook up, right? 

Whether you agree with Iris or Keith in Lemonadegate, there is no dispute that Keith is the coolest arguer on earth.

A "situationship" is a more long-term version of a hookup in which one or more of the parties exhibits couple-like behavior, but they are never an official couple.

Edited by talktoomuch
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7 hours ago, princelina said:

Yeah I hate to stick up for Elizabeth, but he kind of started it.  I didn't think she was doing anything wrong asking about his parents' divorce.

I think it really depends on what they're doing in your fridge - it's not like they were cooking up the chicken she was saving for tomorrow's dinner!  I think beverages at a party are fair game.

We’ll have to agree to disagree on that one. If there are items specifically bought and placed on the kitchen island and on the dining room table, those are the items I expect you to use when I have a party. Don’t open my fridge and take out what you want unless I specifically tell you to. 

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5 hours ago, Desert Rat said:

It's not ready living and sharing with someone else. I think it is good they had this conversation. Marriage is all about compromising and finding common ground. I've been married over 30 years and my husband and I have had dozens (maybe hundreds) of different issues, some small, some big, like this come up, especially in the early years. It's healthy to work through these issues. Ultimately, it makes the relationship stronger. It would be far worse for Iris to keep quite and seethe and resent Keith and his friends.

Personally, I agree with Iris. I don't want people rummaging in my fridge. But there is no right answer. They have to find a resolution together. Maybe Iris learns to accept that some friends will help themselves to the lemonade without asking. Maybe Keith will tell his friends to ask before helping themselves. Maybe they can find a different solution.  The important thing is that they communicate. Disagreements are a normal part of a long term healthy marriage.

Congratulations on being married over 30 years, that’s a rare find. You’re absolutely correct, communication is key in any healthy marriage. These two discuss issues rather than have explosive arguments, so I can see them creating a solution to this little issue and moving on.

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(edited)

So! Brassy Red (tm humble opinion) wants to be COURTED!

The dame who forthrightly, even boldly,  asks "Ready for some Sexy Time?" and hears "Hell  yeah,  Wife!" complains now that Sir Jamie the Seinfeld doesn't bring her candy or flowers, and worse,  "You never initiate anything." Hmmm, whatever could the Big Easy mean there? 

 Low verbal blows: his parents' divorce; his bedroom shortcomings (heh).

 Why? Because of her major disappointment that Jamie's coda to the day was to sit and just "talk,  talk,  talk...."

Lady Elizabeth had hoped her Knight would, of his own initiative, rather sweep her off to the boudoir for a passionate Courtly Love session!

The Shrew wants taming,  Jamie! 

Edited by LennieBriscoe
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44 minutes ago, JAndy said:

That’s fine that Iris feels that way, but the way she went about it was out of line. She was even more rude than the lemonade drinkers. It was really uncalled for. She could have went about it better and maybe Keith would have responded better. Not calling out the friends and limiting them to 2 drinks. 

 Also it’s a fridge. It wasn’t like they were rifling through their drawers taking whatever they wanted. 

I agree, her approach was off in the heat of the moment. She could have pulled Keith aside and asked him to talk to his friends. Hopefully they both learn and grow from this experience.

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Wait a minute. E's mom asks about them consummating the marriage. E gets bashful and said something about knowing her parents don't want to hear stuff like that?? Isn't that what she said or am I remembering wrong?

It's very strange that Elizabeth would try to act embarrassed/pretend her parents are private (normal) people in that moment when her mother had just asked and her father made that comment about penis size. 

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10 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

That was one hell of a fight between Jamie and Red. I don't know how you can recover from a fight like that. When she went in on him about the bad sex you could see his face turn bright red, then he left. He was really embarrassed. He's a gaslighter which is frustrating and her temper is off the charts. She gets so pissed off she doesn't know what she's saying. She just goes in for the kill. 

That was some dirty fighting right there, on both sides.  Ouch!  I didn't think Jamie had to get as nasty as he did about the nepotism.  He could have said something to the effect of "I'm not so sure you didn't get a cake job handed to you by your daddy, but I would love for you to prove me wrong" and leave it there.  But E just kicked it up a notch and threw it right back in his face. 

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12 minutes ago, suzeecat said:

That was some dirty fighting right there, on both sides.  Ouch!  I didn't think Jamie had to get as nasty as he did about the nepotism.  He could have said something to the effect of "I'm not so sure you didn't get a cake job handed to you by your daddy, but I would love for you to prove me wrong" and leave it there.  But E just kicked it up a notch and threw it right back in his face. 

Wow .. they are done!   That’s a big no no in a marriage.  You NEVER knock anything pertaining to sex.  That’s a killer.

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For once I have to ask the producers, "Where the heck do you find these women???"

Yes, Matt seems like a dim bulb, and it's a mystery why a guy who wants to continue to play basketball overseas decided to marry a stranger.  But honestly?  The other three seem like stand-up guys (to varying degrees).   Greg, Keith and Jamie all seem to kind of have their s#!t together.  They're all willing to communicate to the extent that these incredibly f**ked-up women are willing to.  But the women?  Gawdamighty, where did they find them?

Amber is pathetic.  I happen to think that a height differential of 17" is a big deal.  I was married to a guy a foot taller than me and it is very easy to get into little girl mode with a height differential like this.  And that scene of Amber in the dark crying for Matt was like watching an abandoned three-year-old crying for her daddy.  Creepy.  Deonna wouldn't know an adult relationship if it bit her on the nose, and Iris seems to think that her ladyparts are made of solid gold.  As for Elizabeth, well, I haven't seen "Wayne's World" in 20 years, but the term "psycho hose bitch" comes to mind.

Even on a show that has to scrape the bottom of the barrel in order to cast, this bunch of lunatics takes the cake.

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2 hours ago, JAndy said:

That’s fine that Iris feels that way, but the way she went about it was out of line. She was even more rude than the lemonade drinkers. It was really uncalled for. She could have went about it better and maybe Keith would have responded better. Not calling out the friends and limiting them to 2 drinks. 

 Also it’s a fridge. It wasn’t like they were rifling through their drawers taking whatever they wanted. 

Petty shit, and it’s only begun.  She’s going to be a handful.

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Ouch!! For last night's episode, this forum was heavily Team Husband for all 4 couples.  Not all of the comments, of course. But many of the posts state that the women are annoying, immature, selfish, ugly, their voices are wrong, their jobs are wrong, their families are wrong, and they have poor hygiene. 

I'm trying to avoid talking boards on boards--I'm not even sure if that's a rule on Primetimer. But reading 3 pages of comments shows me that the majority of the audience does not like these brides. Which is your opinion and you're certainly entitled to it. The scales are just tipping more towards the men being correct in most situations and the women being crazy. 

10 hours ago, spunky said:

Amber and Matt are this season’s Kate and Luke. He may not have said that he feels “dead and repulsed inside” but his actions speaks volumes. Deonna and Greg are so cute! I like that she made the gathering all about celebrating his birthday and that she’s finally opening up to him.

This. Matt's sarcastic "Yayy" in their opening video and his equally sarcastic "overjoyed" in the car were telling. I feel bad for both of them--this was not a good match at all. 

Yes, Amber is clingy and needy, but she also went into this process hoping to be paired with someone who wanted their marriage to work as much as she does. Someone who would at least put in some effort to make it work. 

I'm not saying she and Greg are compatible, but they both have a level of commitment to their marriage and basic happiness about being married that their spouses don't seem to share.   

And as Soup3333 says below, I don't think Matt was ever ready for marriage. It's true that Amber might not be his type. But I wonder if he'd be  any better if he'd been paired with someone who was his type, be it a Kim Kardashian or Gisele Bündchen type. Or would he still be closed off and stolid (thanks, Amber)?

10 hours ago, bichonblitz said:

That was one hell of a fight between Jamie and Red. I don't know how you can recover from a fight like that. When she went in on him about the bad sex you could see his face turn bright red, then he left. He was really embarrassed. He's a gaslighter which is frustrating and her temper is off the charts. She gets so pissed off she doesn't know what she's saying. She just goes in for the kill. 

Keith and Greg are so laid back. I like them a lot so far. 

1 hour ago, Soup333 said:

I wonder if Matt would put more effort in if Amber were his type, whatever that is. Her clinginess and desperation are a turnoff for sure but I honestly wonder if anything would have made him actually desire a real marriage. 

Iris is over the top at times. Keith seems to reel her in, which is good but would be exhausting after a while. 

Deonna and Greg are cute. He’s hilarious. I kinda hope her birthday is before decision day. I bet he goes all out. I think Deonna isn’t used to affection or actual love so she doesn’t know how to express it in a healthy relationship. I really hope they make it. 

Jamie and E are toxic together and it’s for the best that they don’t want kids. When they get mad they go into the gutter. I don’t think a relationship can survive long when people talk to each other like they do. 

I had been rooting for Jamie and Red, but last night showed me that they are indeed toxic and probably won't work out. 

Caucasian sex?    That was funny but also really, really mean. 

But Jamie did start the fight. He felt defensive when she asked about his parents' divorce, so he started coming at her hard about her job.

How many people in this country get jobs through some kind of connections: friends, family members, prior co-workers, etc? In fact, several recent Presidents and Presidential candidates owe much of the success in their careers to family connections. It doesn't make Beth horrible for accepting a job with her father. 

In terms of why she's working for him: maybe she had another job in the past and was laid off, and she wasn't able to find another one, so dear old dad is helping her out. I do think she's too dependent on her family, but working at her dad's company doesn't make her a failure. 

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10 hours ago, Gem 10 said:

I don’t remember her even having a past.  What is she talking about?  She is very vague.

Yes, she is vague.  At one point in their conversation I think she said something about guy(s) wanting to have sex too early on in the relationship(s).  Or something like that.  The way she keeps talking about "her past" you would think that something very traumatic happened, even though it seems like it didn't.  

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(edited)
10 hours ago, shouldbedancing said:

Okay, this is driving me nuts. Next time MAFS films in a chocolate city and casts dark skinned couples, they need to hire someone who does the lighting on Insecure. I'm sick of Deonna and Greg looking like an oil slick in their talking heads. It's not fair to them uggggggggggggh! 

Well, the next season is in DC. 😉

10 hours ago, princelina said:

Yeah I hate to stick up for Elizabeth, but he kind of started it.  I didn't think she was doing anything wrong asking about his parents' divorce.

I think it really depends on what they're doing in your fridge - it's not like they were cooking up the chicken she was saving for tomorrow's dinner!  I think beverages at a party are fair game.

If it really made Jamie that uncomfortable, then they could have had that discussion off camera as what was mentioned in this speculation below. Jamie could have said something like, "Let's discuss this later" and talked about it in the bedroom (unless production has wired the bedrooms with surveillance cameras as well).

On a side note, I hope Matt had explained his parents' divorce to Amber off-camera as well. Someone on another message board found some info on it, and in light of that, I can see why neither parent would have been in attendance. 

9 hours ago, ramble said:

In my opinion Deonna and Greg are keeping quite a lot of their quality conversations off screen. They seem to like each other a lot and be growing closer. She also seemed much more open to the thought of sexy times after the friend party. I’m hopeful for them. 

This is a good idea!

Edited by discoprincessthe2
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5 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Yes, she is vague.  At one point in their conversation I think she said something about guy(s) wanting to have sex too early on in the relationship(s).  Or something like that.  The way she keeps talking about "her past" you would think that something very traumatic happened, even though it seems like it didn't.  

Deonna stated that during those 10 single years, she dated people that she had sex with too soon. And then she'd sometimes try to develop a friendship after the hook-up, but it wouldn't work. 

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2 minutes ago, Ohwell said:

Yes, she is vague.  At one point in their conversation I think she said something about guy(s) wanting to have sex too early on in the relationship(s).  Or something like that.  The way she keeps talking about "her past" you would think that something very traumatic happened, even though it seems like it didn't.  

Yes.  She jabbers and you don’t even get what she is talking about.  She’s not explicet.  Greg is a great guy and doesn’t deserve this run around not knowing where he stands.  It’s not nice the way she sometimes talks down to him like a teacher talking to a pupil.  There’s nothing wrong with a little affection, but she gives him nothing.  I don’t know about them.

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