S11.E16: More than a Feelin'

[tranquilidade]

53 minutes ago, langford peel said:

When I was a kid in old school Italian Brooklyn the Funeral Homes offered a special service. You could hire a bunch of old Italian grandmothers in black dresses to come to your funeral and wail and cry and scream with grief. My aunt used to do it. Made a nice piece of change. It was often the connected guys who sprung for it because they wanted a big show.

If only they did that now. Tinsley would have a big future in the wailing business. That girl has talent.  Just saying.

Well now this I never heard of.  I might want that at my funeral.  

Edited June 24, 2019 by tranquilidade

[Natalie68]

On 6/22/2019 at 8:03 PM, howiveaddict said:

Didn't Lu perform earlier seasons at either Ramona or Jill's birthday party?  I really believe she takes herself seriously as an artist.  

As for her being an alcoholic. I know there are stories of her being sloppy drunk in public when she was married to the count.  One story she was basically drug out of a party by him after her being all over another man.  If she wasn't an alcoholic, why is it so hard for her to stay sober?

It was a wedding and she grabbed the grooms junk.  It also had her falling in the parking lot.  Came out right after season 1.

[Natalie68]

51 minutes ago, tranquilidade said:

Well now this I never heard of.  I might want that at my funeral.  

I am wondering how I could get that gig!  Sounds like a hoot!

[snarts]

7 hours ago, jumper sage said:

It was all over the media, her antics.  She would be drunk in parking lots and screaming.  You have to go back years and years.  Those of us who were there in the beginning know exactly what I am talking about.  The only reason it was rich-people-behaving-badly and not an arrest was because of the Count.  She does not have him to shield her or she doesn't have the "staff" to run interference for her anymore.

Been here since the beginning and do not know what you're talking about.  There was a ton of discussion around bush-gate and how no one could remember Luann ever being that drunk,  Aside from the oft-repeated story of her & the Count from 10+ years ago, I've never seen anything in the press or on these or TWOP forums about her drinking excessively.

[bravofan27]

2 hours ago, snarts said:

Been here since the beginning and do not know what you're talking about.  There was a ton of discussion around bush-gate and how no one could remember Luann ever being that drunk,  Aside from the oft-repeated story of her & the Count from 10+ years ago, I've never seen anything in the press or on these or TWOP forums about her drinking excessively.

IMO, Luanne has no more a problem than anyone else, and as soon as this probation is over she will be drinking again. That said, alcoholism is progressive and does not happen over night but over years and years. So maybe this is Luanne's wake-up call that she's getting closer to the danger zone. She's in the problem drinking zone from what I can see, as are all the ladies. Not everyone becomes a full out alcoholic, but that doesn't mean they aren't problem drinkers.

Luanne's problems stemmed from personal problems, too much drinking, and vastly lower social status where she didn't have people to monitor and mediate behaviors before they became problems. She was out in the wild on her own, and she clearly hasn't had to deal with the real world before. Hence, her arrest.

From my season 1 viewings (SO HELPFUL!) she is VERY disparaging of people who work for a living, so I'm not at all surprised that she tried to put the low-class blue collar shift working police people in their place. Obviously, we know how that turned out.

Bethanny as, and remains, a hopeless social climber. In her season 1 she used her dad's connections to impress people. Now she's "so rich" (whatever) and waxes poetic constantly about her business acumen and self-made money to get attention.

Also, Ramona has been hawking random products since season 1. It's not to compete with SkinnyGirl. If anything, Bethanny learned from her to use to show to promote her products.

Edited June 25, 2019 by bravofan27

[ButterQueen]

On 6/22/2019 at 8:30 AM, Gem 10 said:

When is this show coming back?  I’m getting withdrawal already.

The season has been so uneventful, I can’t believe It’s almost over.

[Thumper]

On June 22, 2019 at 1:11 AM, smores said:

Lu was apparently required to use the device as part of her original sentence, but when she got hauled back into court recently for violating her probation (for the second time, I might add, as back in February she was in trouble for not complying with her AA meetings).  She wasn't using the device the way she was required to and it was listed in the new requirements again.

They have already attended her show at least twice.  They did it last season (JOVANI!), and then again for the Halloween débâcle that Bethenny didn't stay long enough for.  From what Bethenny said, I'm guessing they have gone other times as well.  Lu wanted them to be there so it could be the season ending party, and she could promote herself/get paid.  If she wants to just own up to it and say that she wanted to have it on the show to promote it, then that's fine, I don't think the others would really begrudge that so much, but she's couching it in "You aren't supporting me in MY work!" Like she's out there saving lives with Doctors without Borders or something.  Plus, the others can decide that they have legit just tired of going to see her show and would like to do another thing. 

I think Lu did the gifts as a manipulative thing.  She's actually done this once before with Bethenny.  Lu has zero self awareness and she won't own being wrong, but at the same time, she's calculating and after coming away from a situation if she thinks that there will be lasting damage between her and Bethenny, she tries to "repair" the relationship.  Remember that birthday party Ramona had for like 60 of her girlfriends in that restaurant? Lu showed up with with a gift for Bethenny that day, it was a purse.  Bethenny was puzzled by it, and it was weird because Lu kind of ostentatiously gave it to her at Ramona's birthday party.  It's the same sort of thing she did here.  Lu didn't get Dorinda anything because she doesn't think she needs Dorinda in the future, or she thinks Dorinda will come crawling back to her without Lu having to ensure that she is there.  Lu isn't sure Bethenny would be there for her, which is why she tries to hedge her bets with gifts. 

Yes she was.  She was gone about 5 hours.  She said she was gone for 2 at the beach and then the others asked her what she was doing for the rest of the time she was gone.  She didn't answer.  And the others had no obligation to coordinate their timing around someone who wasn't even present.  If Lu wanted to be assured of having a massage/glam team at a specific time, she should have been present and making the arrangements.  You snooze, you lose.  The women who are there get to do what they want, when they want.  Plus, honestly how was Lu not going to have the massage last? Exactly how could she have gotten the first, second or third massage when she wasn't even physically IN the house?

I think a lot of what Bethenny struggles with, aside from the obvious "Dennis is gone" is the what ifs.  He was a lot of things to her, at one point a fiancé, a boyfriend, an ex boyfriend.  He was a friend.  When he died, things were unresolved.  He had issues going on and clearly they were such that they were back and forth a lot, but they weren't a permanent break up, the potential existed for him to sort stuff out and then for them to get back together.  Or maybe they would have drifted apart, she would have met someone new and they'd have been friends.  But none of that had time to happen, so Bethenny has to come to terms with all of that.

Grieving for anyone is a challenge to begin with.  When you add unresolved dynamics in, it's worse because one day you think you're doing ok with the way things were and then it hits you that this thing might have happened, or maybe if you'd said this you could have changed the way things were and . . . then you're right back into the mess again.  It's hard.  Letting go of every possibility and knowing that things will always just be unfinished is really, really difficult.  I think this is where she's at, she's able to move forward in some ways, like dating, because they weren't necessarily together, but, she's pulled back at the same time, because there are the what ifs, because the thing that kept them apart (when he was alive), was something that COULD have been changed (his addiction), and potentially, if he had been able to overcome it, then they could have gotten back together.  She's just working on living with the unfinished business. 

When I was a kid, I was flipping through a family photo album at my grandparent's house and in between pictures of a day at an amusement park with my grandparents and my grandparents trip to Hawaii I suddenly came across 2 pages of pictures that horrified me.  One side of the page was photos of my grandfather in the hospital, in traction.  The other side was a bunch of people posed around a coffin, open with a body in it.  I was like "WHAT IS THIS?!" And threw the album across the room.  It turns out that my grandfather was in a car accident when his father died and couldn't make it to the funeral.  So evidently the way they felt best to include him was to take a bunch of pictures so he could experience it.  This was in the late 70s, so someone had to take these pics, (posing the people, mind you), take them somewhere to be developed, and then for some reason, they put them in a photo album! I never did understand that.  

Was I the only one who wondered if they offered taxidermy to Tinsley? I think it was Alan Alda whose parents had his childhood dog stuffed.  

Love your post!  Thoughtful. 

Regarding the last -- I was appalled when my mom and her siblings had photos taken with them and their deceased (90 years) mother.  This would have been in the mid-1980's.  I wonder if that was a generational thing?

[bravofan27]

I think all of us are amazing to show such care and thought into people other than ourselves. It's very healthy and bonding. It's very sweet. I love it that people share their personal stories and how things in their lives have affected them, and how this show brought it up. I think it's a ) great thing. I don't know if that means it is, but I like it! :) No expert though!

Someone on this board posted the absolute sweetest insight about Tinsley, which was so sweet. And over the seasons people have connected with other cast members, which is also very sweet.

[Gem 10]

16 minutes ago, ButterQueen said:

The season has been so uneventful, I can’t believe It’s almost over.

I thought I was watching the Countless Luann Show.

[Gem 10]

6 hours ago, Emmeline said:

I saw this picture of Barbara from more than ten years ago.  Yes, she’s much younger, but without the orange coloring she looks much better.

Bette Midler.  Without the voice.  100% better.  Good color hair, no tanning, nice makeup.

[AnnA]

Wow!   I don't see the Bette Midler resemblance at all. I hate the blonde hair; there are too many blonde HWs.   While I think she over does it with the self tanner,  she definitely needs some blush or bronzer.  She's washed out - way too pale. 

Edited June 25, 2019 by AnnA

[ButterQueen]

This reunion is going to be a snooze.

[Rosiejuliemom]

3 minutes ago, AnnA said:

Wow!   If don't see the Bette Midler resemblance at all. I hate the blonde hair; there are too many blonde HWs.   While it think she over does it with the self tanner,  she definitely needs some blush or bronzer.  She's washed out - way too pale. 

I see a weird cross between Ramona and Lauri Waring Peterson.

[BckpckFullaNinjas]

6 hours ago, langford peel said:

When I was a kid in old school Italian Brooklyn the Funeral Homes offered a special service. You could hire a bunch of old Italian grandmothers in black dresses to come to your funeral and wail and cry and scream with grief. My aunt used to do it. Made a nice piece of change. It was often the connected guys who sprung for it because they wanted a big show.

If only they did that now. Tinsley would have a big future in the wailing business. That girl has talent.  Just saying.

Dang, forget Tinsley, *I* could do this!  I even speak a little Italian!  

[Yours Truly]

3 hours ago, snarts said:

Been here since the beginning and do not know what you're talking about.  There was a ton of discussion around bush-gate and how no one could remember Luann ever being that drunk,  Aside from the oft-repeated story of her & the Count from 10+ years ago, I've never seen anything in the press or on these or TWOP forums about her drinking excessively.

Thank you!

[Gem 10]

1 hour ago, BckpckFullaNinjas said:

Dang, forget Tinsley, *I* could do this!  I even speak a little Italian!  

Spamoni Gardens anyone? Lol.

[bravofan27]

Do these funeral grief people work with insurance?

[smores]

6 hours ago, snarts said:

Been here since the beginning and do not know what you're talking about.  There was a ton of discussion around bush-gate and how no one could remember Luann ever being that drunk,  Aside from the oft-repeated story of her & the Count from 10+ years ago, I've never seen anything in the press or on these or TWOP forums about her drinking excessively.

I have always thought that Lu was a somewhat functional alcoholic.  There have always been the stories and rumors about her being totally different off camera and my thoughts were that it was sort of like the person who doesn't drink Monday to Thursday nights because they have to get up for work the next day, but they spend Friday night through Sunday afternoon packing away the beer or other booze.  My take is that for Lu, this was work and for years she would drink and get happy, but still keep her wits about herself because it WAS work and she wanted to have some control over how she was behaving, much the same way that I have a 2 drink rule for myself at any sort of work function.  But over the last few years, she's had a harder time keeping her control and so the drinking escalated.  

She's had a pretty tight grip on the fact that she was a smoker, too.  In all of the years that she was on the show, I think there's been one scene that showed her smoking.  So she's careful with how she's filmed.  Carole was filmed smoking more than Lu was.  

4 hours ago, Thumper said:

Regarding the last -- I was appalled when my mom and her siblings had photos taken with them and their deceased (90 years) mother.  This would have been in the mid-1980's.  I wonder if that was a generational thing?

I know that death photography used to be an actual thing, but I want to say it was more a turn of the century thing? I know that side of my family only did it because my grandfather wasn't able to go to the funeral.  Well, to my knowledge anyway and I'm sticking with that.  Now when we had a funeral for a grandparent on the other side, a cousin I hadn't seen in decades showed up and apparently thought it was time to play photojournalist.  I didn't know until a few weeks later when I got a disc of pictures from my mother.  It was like an instant replay of the morning, photo by photo.  Thankfully they were cremated, so it was less traumatic than my first experience.  

1 hour ago, bravofan27 said:

Do these funeral grief people work with insurance?

I'm thinking it's a sort of side gig, not a full on income.  Probably a cash only service, like $50 per mourner kind of thing.  Although it is amusing to think of people making up a menu of their mourning services.  

[HunterHunted]

14 hours ago, izabella said:

Tinsley, too!  She was slurring her words and going at Lu.  As if Tinsley doesn't also have drunken behavior and arrest in her background!

13 hours ago, biakbiak said:

Tinsley wasn’t going at Lu she was reinforcing Barbara’s point and stuttered over one word which she was correcting when Lu chose to mock her. 

Tinsley slurred one word and you can tell it's because she realized she changed tenses. She slurred "stood" and "stands" in relation to Barbara defending Luann.

Tinsley does have drunken behavior in her past. They all do, but Tinsley's arrest isn't for public intoxication or a DUI. Her arrest is for trespassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend set her up. He called her and told her to get her stuff. She knew she wasn't supposed to be on the property. She kept calling the police to have them accompany her to pick up her things or stay the trespass order long enough for her to get her things. After a couple of hours and no police, she chanced it and went there. He called the cops on her.

So how dare Tinsley judge Luann for getting arrested when Tinsley has her own arrest for tresspassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend had been gaslighting her by texting her that he still loved her and she could come and get her stuff after she'd broken up with this piece of garbage who was witnessed shoving her to the ground and pushing her head into the pavement and beat her so badly that she ended up hospitalized. How fucking dare she.

[RHJunkie]

16 hours ago, biakbiak said:

She mentioned it more than once in an annoyed tone which to me is pretty much the definition of complaining. If she wasn’t complaining why bring it up at all since there was nothing the woman could do about it.

I don't recall interpreting the scenes that way.

[Gem 10]

2 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

Tinsley slurred one word and you can tell it's because she realized she changed tenses. She slurred "stood" and "stands" in relation to Barbara defending Luann.

Tinsley does have drunken behavior in her past. They all do, but Tinsley's arrest isn't for public intoxication or a DUI. Her arrest is for trespassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend set her up. He called her and told her to get her stuff. She knew she wasn't supposed to be on the property. She kept calling the police to have them accompany her to pick up her things or stay the trespass order long enough for her to get her things. After a couple of hours and no police, she chanced it and went there. He called the cops on her.

So how dare Tinsley judge Luann for getting arrested when Tinsley has her own arrest for tresspassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend had been gaslighting her by texting her that he still loved her and she could come and get her stuff after she'd broken up with this piece of garbage who was witnessed shoving her to the ground and pushing her head into the pavement and beat her so badly that she ended up hospitalized. How fucking dare she.

WOW .. a real nice guy.  Creep.  Still, there are certain things about Tinsley that are endearing. I wish Bravo would give her a nice story line and keep her on.  She deserves a break.

[sasha206]

16 hours ago, izabella said:

Tinsley, too!  She was slurring her words and going at Lu.  As if Tinsley doesn't also have drunken behavior and arrest in her background!

I thought she mentioned it because the women were bitching about her being late, and she told them why she was late.

Yep, Tinsley too.  I know people love her here and she has a certain charm, but Tinsley basically alcohol-shamed Lu a few episodes back by bringing in her dead father to the mix.  I got the impression what she really was trying to say to Lu was, "We have to walk on eggshells around you and I want to be able to drink vodka all day.  So I'm going to tell you about my drunk father to subliminally shame you"

I think Tins has a sweetness to her and a sense of humor, but the former IT girl has some serious problems, IMO.

[Gem 10]

12 hours ago, Thumper said:

Love your post!  Thoughtful. 

Regarding the last -- I was appalled when my mom and her siblings had photos taken with them and their deceased (90 years) mother.  This would have been in the mid-1980's.  I wonder if that was a generational thing?

Probably.  People should remember people as they were when alive.  I hate this whole ritual of the wake and seeing the person dead,all powered up with makeup.  I kissed my parents once (ice cold) and sat in the back the whole time and couldn’t look anymore.  I was sobbing in the church, and sat in the limo in the cemetery.  The whole thing was a horror.  And to boot, mourners come and it’s like a reunion to catch up.  It’s like a party in the back.  This is just my opinion.  Some people want to give an elegant send off, and it’s their right.  There is no right or wrong.

[LibertarianSlut]

6 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

Tinsley slurred one word and you can tell it's because she realized she changed tenses. She slurred "stood" and "stands" in relation to Barbara defending Luann.

Tinsley does have drunken behavior in her past. They all do, but Tinsley's arrest isn't for public intoxication or a DUI. Her arrest is for trespassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend set her up. He called her and told her to get her stuff. She knew she wasn't supposed to be on the property. She kept calling the police to have them accompany her to pick up her things or stay the trespass order long enough for her to get her things. After a couple of hours and no police, she chanced it and went there. He called the cops on her.

So how dare Tinsley judge Luann for getting arrested when Tinsley has her own arrest for tresspassing because her abusive ex-boyfriend had been gaslighting her by texting her that he still loved her and she could come and get her stuff after she'd broken up with this piece of garbage who was witnessed shoving her to the ground and pushing her head into the pavement and beat her so badly that she ended up hospitalized. How fucking dare she.

First, I will say that I dislike Tinsley.  I liked her up through last season.  I dislike her now for not being able to be her own person, unless she has drunken courage and "friends" assisting her.  

I think the facts, as stated, are quite incriminating for Tinsley.  If she knew she wasn't supposed to be on the property, then she had intent to break the law.  I'm not sure if Luann's behavior rises to the level of intent. If one is broken up and wants to go get their things, it's like Judge Judy always says, "get a Marshall!"  I'm not sophisticated enough in Palm Beach County munipical law to know whether they have or require Marshalls (I tend to get the sense that Judge Judy is being euphemistic when she says such things), but if there is an antagonistic relationship, it is common sense that if one wants to retrive property from an ex, they bring a witness during daylight hours and knock on the front door and say, "hi, we're here for Tinsley's things."  If said door opener refuses to grant access to the personal property, then there is legal recourse.  If the police were called several times and did not respond (yet this same county's paramedics respond to a call about a nonresponsive canine), then Tinsely had the means to hire an attorney.  When I see a report that Tinsley's counsel made every attempt to regain Tinsley's right to possession over her chattel and Palm Beach County was unreasonably delayed in their response, I would give her the benefit of the doubt with regard to engaging in self-help.

The only way that Tinsley--who was in her late 30s at this time--was gaslighted or tricked was if she was woefully ignorant or drunk (and I don't think it's disputed that she was intoxicated at the time of the arrest, rendering it a drunken arrest).  Tinsely has no room to criticize Luann for something very similar.  Physical abuse after the fact doesn't change the fact that Tinsley committed a drunken crime and has no place to lecture Luann on same, especially when the woman slurred an entire phrase while browbeating Luann.

If Tinsley was physcially abused while trespassing, I hope she filed her own charges, but that does not mitigate the fact that she committed a crime and got arrested while intoxicated, much like Luann.  If Tinsely knew her ex had tendencies toward physical abuse, it is even more of an argument against stepping onto his property without the proper authority in place. When I see Luann passing judgment on Tinsely, apropos of nothing, I will defend Tinsley.  The situation hasn't reached that point yet AFAIK. All I have seen is Tinsley being perfectly pleasant to Luann'a face when they are sober (post-Al-Anon meeting), but being a bitch when she's in the cups and has the posse behind her.  That is so awful.  It's verging on Bethenny-level awful.

[chlban]

My dogs are my babies, so I am not going to criticize anyone for how they react. That aside, I find Tinsely tiresome. I don't like weak, needy women. I find the baby storyliine odd. She is rich. She has the embryo's, have a kid if that is what you want. It isn't like she has a demanding career, and having a guy around at birth does not mean you won't still end up a single mother anyway. Watching Sonya throw shade at her for basically acting slutty was rich though. Pot, kettle and all. Barbara. I have never liked her, never had any interest in her, but the spray tan mess was revealing, IMO. Nice way to treat someone elses property. Stay classy Barbie. 

Edited June 25, 2019 by chlban

[Normades]

2 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

 If the police were called several times and did not respond (yet this same county's paramedics respond to a call about a nonresponsive canine),

I can believe both and I know the area well.  Her ex is a big name there and I can see the police on the island possibly not responding quickly in that situation because of who he is.  I can also readily believe they would show up for the dog.  They also have their own police force, so they don't use the same police the rest of the county uses and believe me those officers know who's who.

[ShawnaLanne]

On 6/24/2019 at 7:57 AM, Yours Truly said:

I don't think she assumed anyone would stop anything. I don't think she expected an official attempt to block her from getting a massage at all though. Pretty reasonable to think that grown women don't sit around a room figuring out ways to punish another grown woman for fun. But YMMV.

Okay, honestly, I did find that repulsive and childish. But when she made her complaints she didn't know that. Also, she did just expect to have something open for her. So both of my statements, in my head hold true. The other women were awful and Lu expected to be treated like a queen bee.

[LibertarianSlut]

Yes, even if the police didn't show up at all, I outlighted at length, above, what Tinsley could have done instead.  She could have sued for it. There is also the option of forsaking your crap if you're in are exiting a toxic relationship and your ex is using it as a bargaining chip.

What Tinsley didn't need to do was trespass on Fanjul's property, just like Luann didn't have a right to trespass at that hotel.  They both did it because they were under the influence and making really poor decisions.  One may not call out the other for her bad behavior, unless they want their own bad behavior brought up.  What Tinsley did to Luann at Barton G was wrong.

[RHJunkie]

18 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

First, I will say that I dislike Tinsley.  I liked her up through last season.  I dislike her now for not being able to be her own person, unless she has drunken courage and "friends" assisting her. 

1

This has stood out to me this season as well and I have found it incredibly tiresome. This woman had an anxiety attack because she was dared to call her boyfriend with other people in the room (she wasn't even dared to do anything embarrassing or explicit) and she had a breakdown. But put in her a circle of women who are all trash talking the same person and suddenly she's got all this courage to address someone about issues that has nothing to do with her and constantly be blabbing in the background when others, who have a real situation to address with Lu, are trying to talk to her. If she had done to me what she did to Lu at that dinner table, I would have given her a verbal tongue lashing and promise you, I would have sent her off in tears. I don't like rat pack mentality and I defended her when it was her on the receiving end of a group of women analyzing her relationship and giving advice she didn't ask for. Considering how offended she was that the women did that to her, it makes it even worse that she would so readily participate in that kind of behaviour when someone else is the target. Tinsley is behaving like the girl who will do anything to fit in with the popular girls.

[Yours Truly]

15 hours ago, ShawnaLanne said:

Okay, honestly, I did find that repulsive and childish. But when she made her complaints she didn't know that. Also, she did just expect to have something open for her. So both of my statements, in my head hold true. The other women were awful and Lu expected to be treated like a queen bee.

I don't think it's queen bee behavior to expect to be able to use the services provided. It seems the others didn't have to be on any time schedule when it came to when they decided to use the services but it's only LU that was supposed to high tail it back to the house to get hers first if she wanted one at all. I'd be annoyed too. Lu didn't need to see the footage to understand what happened. It was pretty obvious but hey Lu says cabaret too often and doesn't coddle fake meltdowns and histronics. No Massage For You..

[Yours Truly]

19 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

First, I will say that I dislike Tinsley.  I liked her up through last season.  I dislike her now for not being able to be her own person, unless she has drunken courage and "friends" assisting her.  

Tinsley committed a drunken crime and has no place to lecture Luann on same, especially when the woman slurred an entire phrase while browbeating Luann.

If Tinsley was physcially abused while trespassing, I hope she filed her own charges, but that does not mitigate the fact that she committed a crime and got arrested while intoxicated, much like Luann.  If Tinsely knew her ex had tendencies toward physical abuse, it is even more of an argument against stepping onto his property without the proper authority in place. When I see Luann passing judgment on Tinsely, apropos of nothing, I will defend Tinsley.  The situation hasn't reached that point yet AFAIK. All I have seen is Tinsley being perfectly pleasant to Luann'a face when they are sober (post-Al-Anon meeting), but being a bitch when she's in the cups and has the posse behind her.  That is so awful.  It's verging on Bethenny-level awful.

I'm sorry, but Lu's correction of Tinsley when she slurred her words was all kinds of awesome to me. Tinsley deserved it 100% and it was done with such effortlessness that I actually laughed out loud. My problem with Tinsley is that she doesn't actually have a dog in this fight aside from being annoyed on behalf of someone else. At least there's a story with Beth and Barb. A previous grievance with Dorinda. Sonja's another one that doesn't really have anything to harp on Lu about which is why she all of a sudden decided to throw the whole Tom bullshit at her and then decided to jump on the general consensus of "Lu's too much".  The only chiming in Ramona's doing is trying to give Lu a heads up about how the other women are feeling but then decides to pull that mean stunt with the party because why again?  Tinsley has been taking side jabs at Lu for a while now and it has been a response to anything Lu has done directly to Tinsley. It's been Tinsley taking cues from the others and getting some generic kicks in just cause. Which is why I was completely rooting for Lu in that moment when she made Tinsley look stupid. 

[Gem 10]

On 6/23/2019 at 10:43 PM, AuntiePam said:

I hope my husband isn't reading over my shoulder.

I wasn't a virgin bride but I'd only had sex with my first husband.  We were together for almost 30 years.  About a year after he died, I realized that if some guy wanted to sleep with me and I wanted to sleep with him, there was nothing to stop me. 

I was well on my way to being a town slut (at age 47) when I met my current husband.  New sex was fun (especially after being with the same man all those years), but I know that it would have been very depressing had I continued. 

What will save these women is meeting someone who is marriage-worthy, and someone who thinks that they are marriage worthy (or even commitment worthy).   Even if they don't get married, knowing that someone values you will cause you to put a value on yourself.  These women haven't found that yet, except maybe Dorinda -- John would marry her in a heartbeat.

Unfortunately, Sonja is the town slut.  I don’t think Ramona is.  Men a little older than Sonja want young and can get them.  I think Ramona is having sex with Mario here and there.  He could still get young.  I don’t think Dorinda is the type to have multiple partners, but Luann would.  Bethenny can get guys quickly.  She’s got that fresh quick Witt that guys like, plus she has to have a man at all times. Good for her.

[mostlylurking]

3 hours ago, Yours Truly said:

Tinsley committed a drunken crime and has no place to lecture Luann on same

Tinsley was arrested because she was set up by her boyfriend at the time, who was abusive to the point that their neighbors had to get involved as they were in actual fear he would kill her.  

[LibertarianSlut]

1 hour ago, mostlylurking said:

Tinsley was arrested because she was set up by her boyfriend at the time, who was abusive to the point that their neighbors had to get involved as they were in actual fear he would kill her.  

https://pagesix.com/2016/04/16/the-tragic-downfall-of-new-yorks-hottest-socialite/

I am linking to this article because it is actually very pro-Tinsley.  Throughout the article, though, there are routine incidents of really poor drunken decision-making and behavior on Tinsley's part (I'm not going to comment on the Fanjul family, because they're not at issue, but if they were, I'm sure I'd have a few things to say about them).

At some point we have to take responsibility for our behavior and actions.  Tinsely had the means and opportunity to get into intense therapy and potentially an in-patient facility thousands of miles away if she wanted to avoid getting arrested for being "set up."  She also should have put down the bottle, either on her own or with professional help, which is the point.

If we are going to omit personal responsibility, then perhaps we should hold Luann to the same standard and believe her cockamamie story that she was feeling emotional about Tom, so she went from Jupiter to Palm Beach to reminisce about him, and wound up in a hotel room.  Couldn't one say that, by unceremoniously dumping Luann, Tom "set up" Luann to get hammered and have an emotional outburst that led to serious felonies, especially given all the power behind the D'Agostino name?  I don't see the world that way.  I think we are all much more responsible for our behavior than that.

I am generally a Luann apologist (not anymore a fan), but I think she should have gone to jail for what she did (probably for 90 days, given it's her first offense).  But Tinsley is responsible for her actions too.  Neither has any stones to throw about the other's drinking.

Any sympathy I may have had for Tinsely went out the window when she capitalized on the situation and made light of it by making her first season's tag line about a mugshot.  Similarly. I find Luann's tag line this year about pleading guilty abhorrent.

I have yet to read a compelling distinction between the two stories.  I find Tinsley's more troubling, both due to her actions and failures to act.

[divsc]

5 hours ago, RHJunkie said:

This has stood out to me this season as well and I have found it incredibly tiresome. This woman had an anxiety attack because she was dared to call her boyfriend with other people in the room (she wasn't even dared to do anything embarrassing or explicit) and she had a breakdown. But put in her a circle of women who are all trash talking the same person and suddenly she's got all this courage to address someone about issues that has nothing to do with her and constantly be blabbing in the background when others, who have a real situation to address with Lu, are trying to talk to her. If she had done to me what she did to Lu at that dinner table, I would have given her a verbal tongue lashing and promise you, I would have sent her off in tears. I don't like rat pack mentality and I defended her when it was her on the receiving end of a group of women analyzing her relationship and giving advice she didn't ask for. Considering how offended she was that the women did that to her, it makes it even worse that she would so readily participate in that kind of behaviour when someone else is the target. Tinsley is behaving like the girl who will do anything to fit in with the popular girls.

I don't blame Tinsley for not wanting to call her boyfriend on camera. Also, the dare wasn't just to "call her boyfriend." It was to call her boyfriend and give him an ultimatum to be engaged by a certain date. 

After season 1, Bethenny said she regretted asking Jason 1.0 about moving in together on camera. 

She even said it an article - https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2010-feb-28-la-ca-conversation28-2010feb28-story.html

Are there scenes you regret?

I regretted Season 1 when I said to my ex-boyfriend, "Do you want to live together?" And he said, "We'll talk about it later." And I asked him three times after, and he said "We'll talk about it later." America saw that, and I felt like a desperado. 

Also in another season 1 episode, Bethenny warns Jill and Bobby not to discuss babies or relationships in front of Jason, who is an hour and a half late for dinner and then decides to leave early.

They aren't in Tinsley's position and they should back off. Bethenny did the same thing back before she was married again and had her baby. If Tinsley's relationship was already on thin ice or not in a good place, calling Scott in front of everyone and on camera, was not a good move and I like that she refused to. Bethenny was like, "You don't tell us anything." I wouldn't tell these women anything real about my real life relationship either. They aren't nice people and it's really annoying to be the single one with everyone throwing in their two cents. 

[RHJunkie]

39 minutes ago, divsc said:

I don't blame Tinsley for not wanting to call her boyfriend on camera. Also, the dare wasn't just to "call her boyfriend." It was to call her boyfriend and give him an ultimatum to be engaged by a certain date. 

After season 1, Bethenny said she regretted asking Jason 1.0 about moving in together on camera. 

She even said it an article - https://www.latimes.com/archives/la-xpm-2010-feb-28-la-ca-conversation28-2010feb28-story.html

Are there scenes you regret?

I regretted Season 1 when I said to my ex-boyfriend, "Do you want to live together?" And he said, "We'll talk about it later." And I asked him three times after, and he said "We'll talk about it later." America saw that, and I felt like a desperado. 

Also in another season 1 episode, Bethenny warns Jill and Bobby not to discuss babies or relationships in front of Jason, who is an hour and a half late for dinner and then decides to leave early.

They aren't in Tinsley's position and they should back off. Bethenny did the same thing back before she was married again and had her baby. If Tinsley's relationship was already on thin ice or not in a good place, calling Scott in front of everyone and on camera, was not a good move and I like that she refused to. Bethenny was like, "You don't tell us anything." I wouldn't tell these women anything real about my real life relationship either. They aren't nice people and it's really annoying to be the single one with everyone throwing in their two cents. 

Not wanting to call her boyfriend is not the issue and I specifically said that I defended her when the group of women wanted to put her on the spot and talk about her relationship (as if any of them have room to talk). How she handled it was all kinds of alarming to me. She reacted like a battered girlfriend, not like a rational minded woman who stood her ground and let it be known that she found it disrespectful to issue an ultimatum to her boyfriend as a dare and for the benefit of some nosy women.

[divsc]

1 hour ago, RHJunkie said:

Not wanting to call her boyfriend is not the issue and I specifically said that I defended her when the group of women wanted to put her on the spot and talk about her relationship (as if any of them have room to talk). How she handled it was all kinds of alarming to me. She reacted like a battered girlfriend, not like a rational minded woman who stood her ground and let it be known that she found it disrespectful to issue an ultimatum to her boyfriend as a dare and for the benefit of some nosy women.

Good points. She did react just as you say!

[Sheenieb]

So, does Dorinda not know that Tinsley comes from money? I don't know why she thinks that Tinsley was only with Scott for a come up. Tins wasn't living on the streets while Scott went all Henry Higgins on her.

I see Scott is still a forever fuck boy. What is his deal? It's one thing to give a condolence card for Bambi, but Gucci sneakers? He just wants the attention.

Can we talk about Dorinda dry cleaning her thongs? How does that work? Does she pre-rinse before sending them out?

Let's also discuss why these ladies are such trash houseguests? Barbara, why would you spray tan yourself on white furniture? And then not to clean up after herself was too too mucho. I hope those stains got out.

Edited June 27, 2019 by Sheenieb

[smores]

6 hours ago, Sheenieb said:

Let's also discuss why these ladies are such trash houseguests? Barbara, why would you spray tan yourself on white furniture? And then not to clean up after herself was too too mucho. I hope those stains got out.

I don't know that the stains were all from Barbara spray tanning in the room.  I think some of them were from her coming into contact with the furniture.  She likely leaves a trail of tanner behind the way you would lipstick on a glass and if you don't have an all white environment, it isn't as obvious.  I'd also venture a guess that she's going heavier on the tan due to being in bathing suits and on camera, that she might not go that heavy on it normally.  

[HunterHunted]

9 hours ago, Sheenieb said:

So, does Dorinda not know that Tinsley comes from money? I don't know why she thinks that Tinsley was only with Scott for a come up. Tins wasn't living on the streets while Scott went all Henry Higgins on her.

Because they're gatekeepers. That's been a very big issue in Tinsley's life and on this show. When she was with Topper and the queen of New York. Her family didn't have enough money. Their money wasn't old enough. Her family money wasn't the right kind of money. They called her dad a jumped up carpet salesman who dabbled in real estate. And Dale...(gasp)...went to public school. The folks who tend to do the most gatekeeping are heifers like the NY housewives who married into wealth.

I don't think people really questioned if the family really had money when George, Tinsley's dad, married his second wife who was a doctor and only 10 years younger than Dale. There definitely was a period where George was a little out of control after separating from the 2nd wife. During that period, he was with some 20 year old that he openly called an escort. George was drinking and partying like a fucking fool. Dale stepped in and took control of the family finances and put George on an allowance. And so I think because everyone knew all of this, they question how much money her family truly has.

However, gatekeeping has always been a huge part of this franchise from the beginning. Luann, Jill, and Ramona have talked endlessly about "our kind," "our social circle," "our set," and "the right kind of people." And it never gets better. Sonja joins and can't stop talking about these issues. Dorinda joins and we never hear the end of it in regards to beloved erudite Richard and gross blue collar John, even though John went to private schools as a kid and John has engineering and business degrees from Villanova and is the only one of these folks, other than Tinsley, who has ever been invited to the Met Ball. And because they've so bought into this narrative of what wealth looks like, what kinds of businesses are "acceptable," and what someone's hustle might be, they make assumptions based on nothing. Maybe Tinsley is using Rent the Runway, still has some connections with designers and stylists, or maybe she has more money than these dumb bitches speculate.

Edited June 27, 2019 by HunterHunted

[Ohiopirate02]

12 hours ago, Sheenieb said:

I see Scott is still a forever fuck boy. What is his deal? It's one thing to give a condolence card for Bambi, but Gucci sneakers? He just wants the attention.

Yes.  Scott seems not to want to fully commit to Tinsley, but he definitely does not want her to move on with another man.  Tinsley needs to grow up and give Scott an ultimatum--either marry me or stop contacting me.  

[SweetieDarling]

27 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Yes.  Scott seems not to want to fully commit to Tinsley, but he definitely does not want her to move on with another man.  Tinsley needs to grow up and give Scott an ultimatum--either marry me or stop contacting me.  

If he's going to play these games with her, she needs to dump him ASAP, imo. Why put up with these kinds of shenanigans throughout your marriage?  Tinsley needs to grow a backbone and move on.

Edited June 27, 2019 by SweetieDarling

[Baltimore Betty]

28 minutes ago, SweetieDarling said:

If he's going to play these games with her, she needs to dump him ASAP, imo. Why put up with these kinds of shenanigans throughout your marriage?  Tinsley needs to grow a backbone and move on.

I see Tinsley as someone who is addicted to the drama and I see Scott as someone who needs to have women on tender hooks, the more tender the hook the more the woman wants him, his being elusive makes him more of a challenge and what desparate woman doesn't lke a challange? 

Side note, Ramona and Sonja remind me of the two old men in the balcony from the Muppets.  

[BckpckFullaNinjas]

6 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

Because they're gatekeepers. That's been a very big issue in Tinsley's life and on this show. When she was with Topper and the queen of New York. Her family didn't have enough money. Their money wasn't old enough. Her family money wasn't the right kind of money. They called her dad a jumped up carpet salesman who dabbled in real estate. And Dale...(gasp)...went to public school. The folks who tend to do the most gatekeeping are heifers like the NY housewives who married into wealth.

I don't think people really questioned if the family really had money when George, Tinsley's dad, married his second wife who was a doctor and only 10 years younger than Dale. There definitely was a period where George was a little out of control after separating from the 2nd wife. During that period, he was with some 20 year old that he openly called an escort. George was drinking and partying like a fucking fool. Dale stepped in and took control of the family finances and put George on an allowance. And so I think because everyone knew all of this, they question how much money her family truly has.

However, gatekeeping has always been a huge part of this franchise from the beginning. Luann, Jill, and Ramona have talked endlessly about "our kind," "our social circle," "our set," and "the right kind of people." And it never gets better. Sonja joins and can't stop talking about these issues. Dorinda joins and we never hear the end of it in regards to beloved erudite Richard and gross blue collar John, even though John went to private schools as a kid and John has engineering and business degrees from Villanova and is the only one of these folks, other than Tinsley, who has ever been invited to the Met Ball. And because they've so bought into this narrative of what wealth looks like, what kinds of businesses are "acceptable," and what someone's hustle might be, they make assumptions based on nothing. Maybe Tinsley is using Rent the Runway, still has some connections with designers and stylists, or maybe she has more money than these dumb bitches speculate.

Enlightening and I love, with all my heart, thst you’ve  clued me in to this!

Luann was certainly not from money and neither was Dor.  Jill is before my time, but just generally I can’t imagine REAL “old money” being impressed with a retail fabric king (RIP, Bobby, also before my time but word on the street is that he was a mensch).

Also, I’ve seem photos of Slim  John. He was a cutie (granted, my taste runs to swarthy Mediterranean types).

[smores]

11 hours ago, HunterHunted said:

However, gatekeeping has always been a huge part of this franchise from the beginning. Luann, Jill, and Ramona have talked endlessly about "our kind," "our social circle," "our set," and "the right kind of people." And it never gets better. Sonja joins and can't stop talking about these issues. Dorinda joins and we never hear the end of it in regards to beloved erudite Richard and gross blue collar John, even though John went to private schools as a kid and John has engineering and business degrees from Villanova and is the only one of these folks, other than Tinsley, who has ever been invited to the Met Ball. And because they've so bought into this narrative of what wealth looks like, what kinds of businesses are "acceptable," and what someone's hustle might be, they make assumptions based on nothing. Maybe Tinsley is using Rent the Runway, still has some connections with designers and stylists, or maybe she has more money than these dumb bitches speculate.

Yep, it has.  There was the huge fight in an early season where Jill was planning her charity event and Ramona told her it was "declasse" to put your own business on the step and repeat at the event.  Ramona brings up the Social Register and Jill asked her where it was leaving Ramona blinking.  Things were all about what was right, what was done and what was NOT done.  Like men coming to girls night, where you were seated at a fashion show, etc.

[Rosiejuliemom]

6 hours ago, BckpckFullaNinjas said:

Jill is before my time, but just generally I can’t imagine REAL “old money” being impressed with a retail fabric king (RIP, Bobby, also before my time but word on the street is that he was a mensch).

Jill wasn't old money. At all.

When she met Bobby, she was working the menswear counter at Saks (I think?).

Her background seemed to be solidly Long Island middle class.

[HunterHunted]

7 hours ago, BckpckFullaNinjas said:

Enlightening and I love, with all my heart, thst you’ve  clued me in to this!

Luann was certainly not from money and neither was Dor.  Jill is before my time, but just generally I can’t imagine REAL “old money” being impressed with a retail fabric king (RIP, Bobby, also before my time but word on the street is that he was a mensch).

1 hour ago, Rosiejuliemom said:

Jill wasn't old money. At all.

When she met Bobby, she was working the menswear counter at Saks (I think?).

Her background seemed to be solidly Long Island middle class.

Also, I’ve seem photos of Slim  John. He was a cutie (granted, my taste runs to swarthy Mediterranean types).

2 hours ago, smores said:

Yep, it has.  There was the huge fight in an early season where Jill was planning her charity event and Ramona told her it was "declasse" to put your own business on the step and repeat at the event.  Ramona brings up the Social Register and Jill asked her where it was leaving Ramona blinking.  Things were all about what was right, what was done and what was NOT done.  Like men coming to girls night, where you were seated at a fashion show, etc.

If you're a little bit familiar with Prince Harry and Meghan Markle's wedding, there were a ton of experts and commentators who had opinions of what was and wasn't done and that every deviation must be the result of Meghan. It was the position of the commentariat that the Queen of England was bullied into departing from these long held traditions (FYI not that long held) by a barely famous American actress. Meghan was thumbing her nose at thousands of years of British tradition, except the Church of England was established in 1534, white wedding dresses only came into style in 1840 because of Queen Victoria from the House of Hanover, and the House of Windsor was established 1917 from German paternal lineage. Freaking gatekeepers!

Fruitcake, however, is thousands of years old. It comes from ancient Rome. It's the traditional wedding cake. Meghan and Harry went with a lemon cake. They were 100% correct to do so.

To get back to the housewives, these actual shmorons continually ignore the fact that Bethenny actually grew up with money and Ramona's dad was an IBM executive who could afford to lend her $70,000 to start her business. Yes, our two "I'm self made" bitches had substantial legs up. It is a bit hypocritical when they start laying into how the others spend.

It's also really hard to completely lose familial wealth once it manages to survive past 3 generations. That tail end of the third generation/early parts of a fourth generation are a solid indication that the family has figured out a way from keeping the worst members of the family from bankrupting them all. This is based only on my own observations. John is 3rd generation and he's managed to grow the family business. Tinsley is also 3rd generation.

It also just occurred to me that Ramona's weirdness around Barbara might harken back to the fact Ramona's sister, Sonya, is a lesbian.

Edited June 27, 2019 by HunterHunted

[ladle]

Whatever else happened this episode, it tickled me that Ramona's product placement was rushed through, without fanfare.  

[Gam2]

I’ve been watching a marathon today while stuck at home doing the prep for a procedure tomorrow. Yuck. Anyway, Tinsley is telling Ramona about her dog dying and saying she called 911 and the fire truck came. Excuse me? She called 911 and they sent emergency services to her house over a dog?! What a waste of taxpayer funded services! I love our animals as much as the next person and my son is a veterinarian but that was outrageous on Tinsley’s part. Get a grip, woman.

[SweetieDarling]

Can I just say, I love Ramona for her bluntness to Luann, "We love you, but, we don't want to go to your show; We want to hang out and have fun."