The Duggars and Their World: Fashion, Food, Finance, Schoolin’ and Child Rearin'

[Satchels of gold]

The joke of an education is one of the things I hate most about the Duggars ( which is really saying something because there is a lot to hate). I shared in the prayer closet thread several months ago that I have a 14 year old that we adopted from Central Asia at 8 months old and last year I found her bio mother. It took years to track her down but my daughter had some questions that I felt she needed answers to so I was determined to find her. Anyway fast foward to now, we "chat" at least one a week and it's been amazing. I know that in some respects we are not what her bio mother would have hoped for (we are not Asian, muslim ,dark skinned, in country and I'm old enough to be the bio moms mother) but my daughter is getting a hell of an education and that has her bio mom over the moon. Despite all the things that we are not ,that alone superceedes all the other things. She tells me all that time that she prayed to Allah for the right parents and that her prayers were answered because our daughter is getting a wonderful education and is in a home where she is nurtured and supported. So F U Duggars with your backward views on education, adoption, women and I think it's safe to assume that all Muslims are going to hell so double FU. Now I feel better.

[3girlsforus]

 What I am sure of, though, is that Jim Bob wouldn't help him pay for the training that's required. I don't think he'd ever help a kid get a job that would give her or him a life and a schedule that moved that kid out of range of JB's perpetual beck and call. So, it ain't gonna happen, in any case.

 

I think this is the crux of the problem for the Duggar kids trying to strike out on their own. They can't be dedicated to anything that interferes with being at JB's beck and call. Maybe in this way losing the show will be good for at least some of them. It would take a lot to refuse to accommodate JB's demands while the show was on. You know anything he told them to do he manipulated to sound like the show was dependent on it. And since the entire family counted on the show, what kid wants to be the one say they won't do what is necessary for the good of the whole family. Now that Josh has graciously flushed the income for the entire family down the toilet, maybe some of the other kids will find they can do something they want to because JB won't have that to hold over them. Money will still be an issue because JB won't help them financially do anything that wasn't his idea but at least maybe the control won't be as strong. Probably wishful thinking but maybe.

[Julia]

Also Joshgate 1 and 2 and his parents threatening to sue law enforcement over the so-called illegal leak of legal documents would not help his case to become a law enforcement officer either. 

 

Not to mention Joshgate beta, where it became clear that Jim Bob is wired into a less savory faction of local law enforcement.

[Churchhoney]

I think this is the crux of the problem for the Duggar kids trying to strike out on their own. They can't be dedicated to anything that interferes with being at JB's beck and call. Maybe in this way losing the show will be good for at least some of them. It would take a lot to refuse to accommodate JB's demands while the show was on. You know anything he told them to do he manipulated to sound like the show was dependent on it. And since the entire family counted on the show, what kid wants to be the one say they won't do what is necessary for the good of the whole family. Now that Josh has graciously flushed the income for the entire family down the toilet, maybe some of the other kids will find they can do something they want to because JB won't have that to hold over them. Money will still be an issue because JB won't help them financially do anything that wasn't his idea but at least maybe the control won't be as strong. Probably wishful thinking but maybe.

 

Well said. That's what I think and hope, too.

[mimionthebeach]

All of this. And then we're also back to the perpetual mystery of why this whole darned family seems to be so bloody boring. You'd expect a reader, an artist, a gardener, a cook, a snappy wardrobe-overhauling dresser, a gadget inventor -- something -- among all those kids. You'd think that just sheer bloody boredom would drive them to it. But there doesn't seem to be much, if any, evidence of creative, analytical or enterprising thought in the whole lot thus far.

 

What the hell do they all do all day? no one has any interests or apparent hobbies (you know, other than Josh). They don't seem to work much in and around the house  -- no planned family meals, or any structure for that matter. Do they all just loll around the TTH all day marveling that they have 19 KIDS?! How does that not get old?

[Churchhoney]

What the hell do they all do all day? no one has any interests or apparent hobbies (you know, other than Josh). They don't seem to work much in and around the house  -- no planned family meals, or any structure for that matter. Do they all just loll around the TTH all day marveling that they have 19 KIDS?! How does that not get old?

 

That's what I wonder. It's just baffling, isn't it?

[lookeyloo]

Very baffling for sure.  But didn't Zach Bates go to the Police Academy?  How is it possible for him and not any of the Duggars being the Bates are supposedly higher up in the cult?

[birkenstock]

From what I've seen on their show, the Bates family seems to value education (real home school and clown college) more than the Duggars and Zach has work ethic. Zach's been in some form of law enforcement/security guard work for five years. It seems that the Duggars say they are doing things and the Bates actually do them - meaning starting businesses or really working for a living.  

 

ETA: I think that Gil does seem like a grifter at times, but his sons are shown working at the tree trimming business and Lawson's landscaping. Even Erin and Michael were allowed to earn money through piano lessons and nannying respectively. The Bates are Gothard and part of a cult, but they seem to have their lives in some sort of order.

Edited September 12, 2015 by Cocka doodle dont

[louannems]

I'm watching 19Kids "Wedding Bells", and Jill is wearing The Mustard Cardigan! This is way before Jill even married! They are at Erin Bates wedding. Wow! How many years can one Cardigan last! She wears this so often, Jill must really love the mustard color. I do not think it flatters her skin tone.

[3girlsforus]

What the hell do they all do all day? no one has any interests or apparent hobbies (you know, other than Josh). They don't seem to work much in and around the house  -- no planned family meals, or any structure for that matter. Do they all just loll around the TTH all day marveling that they have 19 KIDS?! How does that not get old?

No kidding. Most of us wish we had less to do and our kids were less booked up. The Duggars seem to have nothing to do. 

[kokapetl]

Well they wake up about 11 am...

[BitterApple]

Very baffling for sure.  But didn't Zach Bates go to the Police Academy?  How is it possible for him and not any of the Duggars being the Bates are supposedly higher up in the cult?

Yes, Zach went to the Police Academy. He had a post up on Instagram thanking Whitney for being so supportive during the eleven weeks of training, so it was definitely the real deal. I think Gil and Kelly are much more realistic and don't have the same control issues as Boob and Michelle. Alyssa is wearing skinny jeans  and hasn't been excommunicated yet. Erin is still pursuing  music after marriage and a baby and Tori goes to school and sits with boys in the cafeteria. I think Gil is also smart enough to realize that happy, well-rounded kids make for more desirable marriage partners. The Duggars are batting well below .500 in this area.

 

Regarding the ubiquitous cardigan, I agree the color isn't flattering on Jill. Mustard usually flatters women with warmer skin tones, dark hair and dark eyes.

Edited September 12, 2015 by BitterApple

[Ilovemylabs]

Yes, Zach went to the Police Academy. He had a post up on Instagram thanking Whitney for being so supportive during the eleven weeks of training, so it was definitely the real deal. I think Gil and Kelly are much more realistic and don't have the same control issues as Boob and Michelle. Alyssa is wearing skinny jeans  and hasn't been excommunicated yet. Erin is still pursuing  music after marriage and a baby and Tori goes to school and sits with boys in the cafeteria. I think Gil is also smart enough to realize that happy, well-rounded kids make for more desirable marriage partners. The Duggars are batting well below .500 in this area.

 

Regarding the ubiquitous cardigan, I agree the color isn't flattering on Jill. Mustard usually flatters women with warmer skin tones, dark hair and dark eyes.

Thanks for posting 'what the hell do they do all day?'  I've been wondering that myself.  The education issue really bugs me.  When I was a missionary in Malaysia we had neighbors who lived in what could only be considered a hut.  They had electricity and running water, but the place was really run-down looking, even for there, where huts were pretty common.  I found out they owned the biggest electronics and appliance store in town.  They would not spend a cent on themselves because they had 3 kids whom they had sent to college out of the country...two to Australia and one to Canada.  They were willing to make that sort of sacrifice for their kids' education.  When I started watching the Duggars I was OK with the home schooling, because I believe it can be as good, if not better in some cases, than public school.  But now that I know better (about what they consider education) it just disgusts me.

[louannems]

What do they all Do all day? They do spend entire days debating whether the next little blessing is a boy or girl. Decorating for endless gender reveal parties. birthdays, fake graduations, etc.

[JenCarroll]

It's scary to imagine the degree to which this "keep everybody away from the opposite sex" thing may play in to the lack of job, education and career options for all the Duggars. Scary because it's insane.

Yeah, that pretty much sums it up for me.

[SometimesBites]

What the hell do they all do all day? no one has any interests or apparent hobbies (you know, other than Josh). They don't seem to work much in and around the house  -- no planned family meals, or any structure for that matter. Do they all just loll around the TTH all day marveling that they have 19 KIDS?! How does that not get old?

Have you seen the video on YouTube of JB giving Michelle that butt-ugly birthstone ring? There is a moment when a Duggar Studios pseudo-professional camera-wielder pans into the room, and shows a big herd of them slouched about, doing essentially nothing. I think it's probably a fair representation of a typical day in Duggar Land. Looked like a casting call for extras on The Walking Dead.

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

I don't understand how as parents JB and Michele don't want more for their kids.

Unfortunately, instead of wanting more FOR their kids all JimBob & Michelle ever wanted was MORE kids. There in lies one of the major problems with the two of them.

[pinguina]

Bitterapple, Ilovemylabs - I have often wondered the same thing -  No jobs, no friends, no school/college, no hobbies, they don't clean or cook.  So how exactly do they spend their days??

Can't help but add - What are they so afraid of that their GROWN children cannot be trusted out in the world?  Growing up as a Catholic, there have been times when I was in situations where I struggled to keep  to my beliefs and sometimes even defend what I believed.  Doing this helped me understand my faith and made me more confident in what I believed.  Can these people explain what they believe and why?  Could they hold on to their faith without a "buddy"?

Plus - Why is real learning and reading real books so wrong to them??

[Churchhoney]

Plus - Why is real learning and reading real books so wrong to them??

 

I would bet the real answer to this is that Jim Bob's ego (and also Bill Gothard's, but only secondarily) can't brook the possibility that somebody might learn something or wonder something or think something beyond the minuscule amount that he, JB -- the umbrella of everything -- knows.

 

I suppose the ideological answer is that God's primary commandment is that the Bible is the only thing we need. And that therefore everything else is merely a temptation of the devil.

 

Pffthhhht to both answers, I say.

[kokapetl]

JimBob's ego needs his children to be successful with whatever education he's provided them, so he can feel secure about being a provider, and to a lesser extent, they also need to be successful with absolutely no more education than he received, so he can feel secure about his own education.

[mbutterfly]

I think they do, but not due to any genuine theological convictions. IMO it goes hand in hand with their overall assholishness. Of course they want to spawn that sort of far-reaching, long-lasting dynasty, it feeds into their narcissism and bloated self-importance. It's purely masturbatory.

 

Jim Bob probably wants to become the upright Christian version of that evil heathen Genghis Khan.

 

I think he sees himself as the Christian Jacob, and considering some of Jacob's sons and the fate of Jacob's daughter, he kind of is.

[Julia]

I just think Jim Bob has managed to pull off the neat trick of appointing himself as the first patriarch in his line. If he can arrange for all his progeny to follow in his footsteps, no-one will be better educated, no-one will be more successful, and no-one will be closer to God. And he shall reign forever and ever.

In light of that, education becomes a really bad idea on just about every level. Which is monstrous, but not out of character.

[Wellfleet]

Very baffling for sure.  But didn't Zach Bates go to the Police Academy?  How is it possible for him and not any of the Duggars being the Bates are supposedly higher up in the cult?

 

IMO, it's possible because the Duggars are just that much lazier. In addition, the Bates are higher up in the cult and incredibly, they were apparently able to achieve that status even as their kids were being educated [albeit at pre-approved "colleges" or programs], pursuing their own interests, having social lives that didn't include their parents etc. As with everything else, Boob's fear is driving the bus. His fears are what's keeping those kids at the TTH all day every day, directly under his thumb. He's afraid they'll become interested or enthusiastic about things he knows nothing about and more importantly, can't control. Which is terrifying to him because over time it'll whittle away his all-encompassing Daddy Power.

Edited September 13, 2015 by Wellfleet

[LilyoftheValley]

There's a Jason?

You know, I don't think I even have 19 FRIENDS. There just aren't enough days in the week. I know we all know this but honestly, how does anyone have a family of 21+ people and have any familiarity with them as individuals? I can hardly keep my cats' names straight at times. It just seems so insane to keep pumping out kids.

Not to mention having 14 kids in a two-bedroom house, or when living in a bus or whatnot. LOONS.

They have done studies.  Essentially an individual can have a maximum of 12 close friends and a wider social circle of 50.  No really it is that small.  What I took from that is that even modern people have a little tribe and a big tribe and those are your tribes and that's it. If everyone here stopped and really thought about it, you would notice the same pattern in your life.  People will attempt to make these bigger, but you always wind up whittling them down.  

[LilyoftheValley]

I don't understand how the unmarried adult children can stand living at home with their little brothers and sisters and their parents and not have anything going for them!  Look, I completely understand moving in to your parents house to save money or to start a new career (I did the exact same thing to get my law career going - didn't want to, but had to).  However, I initially moved out to go to college when I was 17 and had roommates and my own thing going. People have observed that the Duggar children just look slouched around a lot of the time.  Well that makes sense.  If was was in my late teens/early 20's and I had their life, I would be incredibly depressed too.  

 

Heck, Jinger does not need daddy to pay for photography lessons.  All she needs to do is contact a local photographer and offer to be a free assistant for a year in exchange for her (I know it would have to be a woman) teaching Jinger everything about photography.  In fact all the children have the option of doing a year-long apprenticeship like that.

[cmr2014]

Plus - Why is real learning and reading real books so wrong to them??

 

It's about control.

 

Real learning leads to critical thinking and asking questions, that's just a non-starter.

 

The other issue is that if the kids were educated, they would have options. Right now all of the young men "work" for JB, and he provides their housing and their vehicles. He has complete control over them, and if they step out of line will lose their place to sleep and the food on the table. If they had an education, or a trade, they would have options in employment. If they had options, they might choose to live elsewhere -- not under the "umbrella" of JB.

[Joe Jitsu913]

Bitterapple, Ilovemylabs - I have often wondered the same thing - No jobs, no friends, no school/college, no hobbies, they don't clean or cook. So how exactly do they spend their days??

Can't help but add - What are they so afraid of that their GROWN children cannot be trusted out in the world? Growing up as a Catholic, there have been times when I was in situations where I struggled to keep to my beliefs and sometimes even defend what I believed. Doing this helped me understand my faith and made me more confident in what I believed. Can these people explain what they believe and why? Could they hold on to their faith without a "buddy"?

Plus - Why is real learning and reading real books so wrong to them??

Reading real books might give the Duggar children the opportunity to develop critical thinking skills. One of them may decide that Buddhism or Wicca is interesting. Or maybe reading a book about science will lead a Duggar child to question Creationism. Jim Bob can't allow this to happen. He needs control of his kids and he needs to feel superior intellectually. Jim Bob is a very insecure man. It would be devastating to him if one of the Duggar children became an Atheist or a went to college. That may inspire the other children to follow suit.

The Duggars for all of their pontificating, do not have faith in their cult beliefs. This is why they don't trust their kids, because they know their beliefs are bullshit.

[LilyoftheValley]

Reading real books might give the Duggar children the opportunity to develop critical thinking skills. One of them may decide that Buddhism or Wicca is interesting. Or maybe reading a book about science will lead a Duggar child to question Creationism. Jim Bob can't allow this to happen. He needs control of his kids and he needs to feel superior intellectually. Jim Bob is a very insecure man. It would be devastating to him if one of the Duggar children became an Atheist or a went to college. That may inspire the other children to follow suit.

The Duggars for all of their pontificating, do not have faith in their cult beliefs. This is why they don't trust their kids, because they know their beliefs are bullshit.

You nailed it.  Indeed I think all the Duggars are very insecure people.  Their cockiness is a mask.  

[Julia]

Right now all of the young men "work" for JB, and he provides their housing and their vehicles. He has complete control over them, and if they step out of line will lose their place to sleep and the food on the table. If they had an education, or a trade, they would have options in employment. If they had options, they might choose to live elsewhere -- not under the "umbrella" of JB.

 

Not to mention that the only success Jim Bob has ever achieved in life - keeping in mind that he actually managed to explode the head start his parents gave him - is based on the fact that he doesn't have to pay salaries to his children. You can't pay anyone else with tater tot casserole and a bunk bed, at least not unless they're in prison.

[CofCinci]

Not to mention that the only success Jim Bob has ever achieved in life - keeping in mind that he actually managed to explode the head start his parents gave him - is based on the fact that he doesn't have to pay salaries to his children. You can't pay anyone else with tater tot casserole and a bunk bed, at least not unless they're in prison.

Hell, prison industries pays better than what the Duggar working-age males receive from their father.

[pinguina]

LilyoftheValley, Joejitsu - I think you might be right about the threat with learning and reading.  I love to read and sometimes read books that challenge my ideas, opinions, beliefs.  At times they add to them, at times my opinion might change or be more open, at times it will reinforce what I believe.  I come away with a new perspective or information I didn't know.  

Having access to (new, for them) ideas, perspectives, opinions can be a challenge for the Headship (AKA JimBob) and threatening to his programming of his cult members (AKA - family).  But, as many have stated in this forum, it severely limits them all.  Where others might see a challenge to overcome or a problem to solve, these people see a threat/Satan/evil and run away.   How much of life they are missing, how much joy (as in fun, happiness, exhilaration) are they not experiencing by being so limited in what the world is and has to offer?

I hope that one day one of these members (children) will have a moment of clarity and just walk away - there has to be someone that they could go to for support or help.

[Muffyn]

Not entirely sure. Could be. But I have several commercial pilots in my family, and a couple of them don't have college educations, aren't ex-military, have a fair amount of emotional fragility and are, in my opinion, fairly frequent drunks. 

This is one of the best things I have read all day.  Quite the turn of a phrase.  

 

Have you seen the video on YouTube of JB giving Michelle that butt-ugly birthstone ring? There is a moment when a Duggar Studios pseudo-professional camera-wielder pans into the room, and shows a big herd of them slouched about, doing essentially nothing. I think it's probably a fair representation of a typical day in Duggar Land. Looked like a casting call for extras on The Walking Dead.

I like the thought of using the Duggar kids as zombie extras on The Walking Dead.  JB and Mechelle couldn't do it because they could never get those stupid smiles off their faces.  And of course Mechelle would forget she was a zombie and spend all of her time looking lovingly at Jim Bob.  The it hit me, as zombies the kids would be forced to lust for flesh.  They couldn't do it.  Someone would yell "Nike!" and they would all stare at their shoes.  That makes for an awkward zombie shuffle. 

[Churchhoney]

 

Heck, Jinger does not need daddy to pay for photography lessons.  All she needs to do is contact a local photographer and offer to be a free assistant for a year in exchange for her (I know it would have to be a woman) teaching Jinger everything about photography.  In fact all the children have the option of doing a year-long apprenticeship like that.

 

And, in fact, to go much farther than most appear to have gone, they wouldn't even have to hook up with scary outside strangers. Jinger, for instances, could learn a lot of stuff just from noncontroversial websites and the library and just from experimenting. But it appears that they don't even do that sort of thing. They do appear, to me, anyway, to lack curiosity and drive to an astonishing degree.

[Marigold]

I'm watching 19Kids "Wedding Bells", and Jill is wearing The Mustard Cardigan! This is way before Jill even married! They are at Erin Bates wedding. Wow! How many years can one Cardigan last! She wears this so often, Jill must really love the mustard color. I do not think it flatters her skin tone.

It's like Michelle and The Green Shirt.  It's everywhere! Anna even wore it or has an identical one. 

 

Mustard Cardigan and Green Shirt....hmmm......

One of my last Sundays as a Fundamentalist was when the preacher said that we need to run books past him to make sure they were Ok to read.

 

Uh...hell no! I'm a big reader and I have a Master's Degree. I don't need some doorknob's approval on what I read. 

Bye Felicia. 

 

I was raised Fundamentalist but NOT like that.  No way. I was encouarged to go to school and get an education. 

[LilyoftheValley]

And, in fact, to go much farther than most appear to have gone, they wouldn't even have to hook up with scary outside strangers. Jinger, for instances, could learn a lot of stuff just from noncontroversial websites and the library and just from experimenting. But it appears that they don't even do that sort of thing. They do appear, to me, anyway, to lack curiosity and drive to an astonishing degree.

Well the Duggar parents have limited curiosity as well.  They have gotten to take a lot of trips but you just know that was purely for the show.  Let me put it this way: if the Duggars won 10 million in the lottery and they were never on TV, there is no way in hell they would have taken a trip to China.  At best they would have bought a really fancy RV and gone to visit the Bates family.  I have some hope for Jill since Derick does actually seem interested in things and curious about the world.  

 

Every fundie family I have ever known was like this.  They never traveled or read unique books or learned languages or anything like that.  I sometimes think that fundamentalism is a cover for people who have zero curiosity or interest.  Their blandness and banality can be explained away by their religious beliefs, and that is one of the things that (subconsciously) attracts them to the religion.  The Duggars are exceptionally boring people one the individual level.  The thing about them that is interesting is that they have 19 kids.  Other than that, not one of them is well-spoken, funny, quirky, artistic, intelligent, curious or anything but pure white bread blandness.  Shit, David and Priscilla Waller look interesting by comparison.  

[Churchhoney]

Well the Duggar parents have limited curiosity as well.  They have gotten to take a lot of trips but you just know that was purely for the show.  Let me put it this way: if the Duggars won 10 million in the lottery and they were never on TV, there is no way in hell they would have taken a trip to China.  At best they would have bought a really fancy RV and gone to visit the Bates family.  I have some hope for Jill since Derick does actually seem interested in things and curious about the world.  

 

Every fundie family I have ever known was like this.  They never traveled or read unique books or learned languages or anything like that.  I sometimes think that fundamentalism is a cover for people who have zero curiosity or interest.  Their blandness and banality can be explained away by their religious beliefs, and that is one of the things that (subconsciously) attracts them to the religion.  The Duggars are exceptionally boring people one the individual level.  The thing about them that is interesting is that they have 19 kids.  Other than that, not one of them is well-spoken, funny, quirky, artistic, intelligent, curious or anything but pure white bread blandness.  Shit, David and Priscilla Waller look interesting by comparison.  

 

That's about the size of it, certainly. And I do think that the boringness and the fear-based nature of fundieness go hand in hand.

 

I guess I find it especially odd because I came from an extremely boring, highly controlling family like that, and yet there were a couple of people who were quite different and revealed that difference very early on. I suppose a different one is probably lurking down in the lower reaches of the 19. But it still does strike me as a bit strange that the boringness has apparently gone so far down the line of kids without being relieved by any questioners of or rebels against the grayness. I'm not familiar with a lot of other families like my own, though, so my thoughts about this may be based on way too small a sample.

I hope that one day one of these members (children) will have a moment of clarity and just walk away - there has to be someone that they could go to for support or help.

 

I'm not convinced there's anyone they could go to. I had no one to go to when I walked away. That's part of the price of being isolated. People walk anyway, though, and it'll be interesting to see which Duggar finally does.

[GeeGolly]

I wonder how Amy would react if one of the Duggar 19 reached out with wanting her help leaving. It definitely would be complicated no matter what she did, but would she support them?

[Liz Tudor]

I'm hoping this is the right topic for this (fundie fashion). I'm on another discussion board that is anti-mlm, and this one called LuLaRoe popped up. Warning: if you visit the link, do not adjust the settings of your computer, etc., as this stuff really IS that ugly: http://www.lularoe.com/collection-1/

I immediately knew something was up, I guess my Fundie Sense was tingling. Sure enough, it is "modestly wear" marketed mainly to conservative LDS ladies (absolutely no offense intended), but these clothes certainly meet the Duggars, et. al. dress codes. Someone made the very good point that ladies of many religions dress modestly, but stylishly (and posted pix from catalogs for Muslims & Jewish fashions, both very chic). Here are the poster's exact words, "Something that has always puzzled me about modest dress: when modest fashion caters to Jews & Muslims, it actually looks cool and fashion forward--just coincidentally covered up. When modest fashion caters to Christians, Mormons, etc., it's like looking attractive in any way at all is a sin."

I almost got my boards confused, but I think she nailed it. There are ways of dressing modestly without looking frumpy, but that's not in a Duggar strong suit. Except for Jana lately.

[kokapetl]

That's about the size of it, certainly. And I do think that the boringness and the fear-based nature of fundieness go hand in hand.

I guess I find it especially odd because I came from an extremely boring, highly controlling family like that, and yet there were a couple of people who were quite different and revealed that difference very early on. I suppose a different one is probably lurking down in the lower reaches of the 19. But it still does strike me as a bit strange that the boringness has apparently gone so far down the line of kids without being relieved by any questioners of or rebels against the grayness. I'm not familiar with a lot of other families like my own, though, so my thoughts about this may be based on way too small a sample.

I'm not convinced there's anyone they could go to. I had no one to go to when I walked away. That's part of the price of being isolated. People walk anyway, though, and it'll be interesting to see which Duggar finally does.

They can always go live with Ms Amy "I'm free now" King.

[Churchhoney]

They can always go live with Ms Amy "I'm free now" King.

 

Oh, forgot about that. Since she already has so much experience with rebelling against JB and M's rules. They can rejoice together in not having to wear the long skirts, or, in case it's a male breakaway, in not having to wear jeans and a long-sleeved shirt in the swimming pool.

Edited September 13, 2015 by Churchhoney

[CofCinci]

I wonder how Amy would react if one of the Duggar 19 reached out with wanting her help leaving. It definitely would be complicated no matter what she did, but would she support them?

She'd help, but first she'd call PEOPLE and secure the cover.

[Churchhoney]

I wonder how Amy would react if one of the Duggar 19 reached out with wanting her help leaving. It definitely would be complicated no matter what she did, but would she support them?

 

Put in immediate calls to People and TLC?

 

Because there's your spinoff -- Breaking Duggar with the Kings. And Jim Bob couldn't really block it.

Edited September 14, 2015 by Churchhoney

[Tabbygirl521]

They have done studies. Essentially an individual can have a maximum of 12 close friends and a wider social circle of 50. No really it is that small. What I took from that is that even modern people have a little tribe and a big tribe and those are your tribes and that's it. If everyone here stopped and really thought about it, you would notice the same pattern in your life. People will attempt to make these bigger, but you always wind up whittling them down.

That is interesting! I want to do some more reading about that. Makes sense to me on a gut level. Imagine having just an immediate family that exceeds your "little tribe" limit. No wonder they have no friends. They just can't.

[galax-arena]

They have done studies. Essentially an individual can have a maximum of 12 close friends and a wider social circle of 50.

I found this article:

The vital friendships—the pals you hug and laugh and lament with—are the ones who have the greatest impact on your health and happiness. You need between three and five of them for optimal wellbeing, suggests research from Dr. Robin Dunbar, an evolutionary psychologist at the University of Oxford.

 

Dunbar’s name comes up a lot when you start digging into the subject of friendship. From his early work studying the brains and social circles of primates, he recognized that the size of a human’s social network might be limited by the size of a certain part of the human brain called the neocortex, a critical site for higher brain functions. After some complicated study, he came up with a figure now known as “Dunbar’s number.”

 

That number—usually cited as 150, but actually a range between 100 and 200—is the approximate size of a person’s social circle, or the perpetually changing group of friends and family members that you would invite to a large party. While you may have far fewer than 150 of these people in your life, your brain really can’t hold a close connection with more than 150, Dunbar’s research shows. Within that group, he says your closest 15 relationships—including family members or “kin”—seem to be most crucial when it comes to your mental and physical health.

So not quite as small as 50, but still more limited than I think people might have assumed. 

[MarysWetBar]

And, in fact, to go much farther than most appear to have gone, they wouldn't even have to hook up with scary outside strangers. Jinger, for instances, could learn a lot of stuff just from noncontroversial websites and the library and just from experimenting. But it appears that they don't even do that sort of thing. They do appear, to me, anyway, to lack curiosity and drive to an astonishing degree.

Jing HAS,however, shown an increasing interest in self-Tanner or tanning beds! Photographer, my ass. Delusion at its best.

[Cherrio]

I sum up the Duggar offspring's education and any skills they claim they have as asking someone if you would let Casey Anthony babysit for you.

[Guest]

Wild Speculation Alert::

 

I know Michelle has hinted that some of the middle and younger children have mild learning disabilities. It occurred to me that living literally across the street from a landfill, as they do, might introduce harmful toxins into the air and ground. I did a little bit of research online and it turns out that, yes, living next door to a landfill can cause some health problems and learning difficulties. 

 

If I had their money, I would build a new TTH on a new plot of land somewhere else, but I'm guessing JB is probably too cheap. 

[floridamom]

If Jinger is supposed to be such a professional photographer, why then did Jill and Derick post new photos of themselves and Izzy taken by a "real" professional photographer? Shouldn't Jinger, the PRO, have taken those photos? Another mirror and smokescreen with invented truths by the Duggars. I'm not taking away from any real talent that Jinger may have for photography, but that woman will never know what she might and could have done professionally as she's not really allowed to become anything "real". Same for all of her siblings, guys included....they all work for their father. No real future there, IMO, for any of them.

BTW, that landfill isn't across the street from the Duggar compound, I understand it's about a mile away.

[Guest]

If Jinger is supposed to be such a professional photographer, why then did Jill and Derick post new photos of themselves and Izzy taken by a "real" professional photographer? Shouldn't Jinger, the PRO, have taken those photos? Another mirror and smokescreen with invented truths by the Duggars. I'm not taking away from any real talent that Jinger may have for photography, but that woman will never know what she might and could have done professionally as she's not really allowed to become anything "real". Same for all of her siblings, guys included....they all work for their father. No real future there, IMO, for any of them.

BTW, that landfill isn't across the street from the Duggar compound, I understand it's about a mile away.

 

On the first point, it's my understanding that particular photographer is a big deal in Arkansas and you get a free session with her when you buy baby furniture from certain high-end boutiques as Jill and Derick did with that chair. But yeah, I agree about Jinger. 

 

On the second point, it is not a mile away if you check their address on Google earth maps. 

Edited September 17, 2015 by Guest

[Satchels of gold]

On the first point, it's my understanding that particular photographer is a big deal in Arkansas and you get a free session with her when you buy baby furniture from certain high-end boutiques as Jill and Derick did with that chair. But yeah, I agree about Jinger. 

 

On the second point, it is not a mile away if you check their address on Google earth maps.

My daughter is an amazing artist and was just started her freshman year in a high school art academy. We often lament what would become of her talent if she had stayed in Central Asia. It really is a crime that they have so much at their disposal and don't use any of it to benefit their children. Everything good I have in my life is because I got an education and my parents let me stand on their shoulders to get it.