Josiah and Lauren: He Has To Marry Somebody

[ginger90]

1 hour ago, Temperance said:

JimBob's real name is James and it's his license.  His son James is not old enough.

Edited July 7, 2018 by ginger90
Never mind

[Wishing Well]

On Supergirl, they changed Jimmy Olsen’s canon name so that he is seen as the more masculine, asesertive, romantic, James Olsen, aka Guardian.  

 

Meanwhile this dude here named himself Jim Bob

[Catlyn]

On 7/4/2018 at 10:27 PM, charmed1 said:

Oh hell yeah, girls. Did you have the black one with the giant sunflowers on it? I had about five of those sundress t-shirt combos with the all white shit kickers to go with them. They were like half Keds, half hiking boots. Man those shoes were ugly. And yes, unbelievably, that style has been resurrected. But I think the Duggars are probably wearing it in a ridiculous Maude Flanders way and not in a Kelly Taylor/Brenda Walsh way.

I read this as a Moll Flanders way, something I don't think the Duggars would do or even have heard of.  Back when I was in high school and sun dresses came out, we wondered why those girls who wore t-shirts under their sundresses didn't just wear a strapless bra or go without. Early 70s.

[bigskygirl]

1 hour ago, Wishing Well said:

On Supergirl, they changed Jimmy Olsen’s canon name so that he is seen as the more masculine, asesertive, romantic, James Olsen, aka Guardian.  

 

Meanwhile this dude here named himself Jim Bob

Jim Bob's name is James Robert Duggar. He goes by the name Jim Bob.

[sATL]

On 7/3/2018 at 7:51 PM, ginger90 said:

I didn’t watch the videos yet. They are on Michelle’s blog.

Good Lord !! When was the last feeding Joy ? She looks like she has a couple of gallons of milk..  Ai yai yai!

Edited July 8, 2018 by sATL

[sATL]

On 7/5/2018 at 5:54 PM, Christina87 said:

Does anyone think the bridesmaid dresses look early 80's? They just remind me of something people would be wearing in an older church directory. They would have been much more stylish without the pleats on top, in my opinion. There are many ways they could have done that color and met their modesty standards that would have been more flattering!

RE- the Bridesmaids dresses... according to people ( link )

"For their special day, the bride chose a wedding gown from The White Dress Boutique, while her eight bridesmaids wore blush-colored dresses handmade by Jana Duggar and Josh Duggar’s wife Anna. "...

Two poor Cinderellas..

I don't care for the bride's hair in the article's cover photo for her wedding... I guess the humidity got to it. she should have worn her hair up  or maybe a soft braid. She looks like she just worked out at the gym

Edited July 8, 2018 by sATL

[zenme]

On 7/6/2018 at 7:20 PM, Fuzzysox said:

Well said. I'm sure like I said before Josiah will be spending a lot of time in the bathroom crying over what his life has become. He had so much spunk. Now he seems to be reading from a bad movie script because he was told that this is the way life was going to be. So, so sad. 

Well, if Josiah starts to get discouraged in his marriage, he can always re-watch Fireproof.  I'm sure that'll turn things around!

Wow! Joy sure has inherited Michelle style breasts. Or perhaps Deanna style?

[sATL]

wonder of Jim Bob is giving fatherly advice to Gil Bates on how to get the sons down the aisle quick and in a hurry.. JB managed to get 3 sons married - actually 2 in a row. I think Josiah is younger than the next in line trio - Lawson, Nathan, Trace

[Baby Button Eyes]

Michelle looks like a wet rat and Joy may need a breast reduction someday but unlikely Voldemort Sr. will allow it.  Even after a lot more Voldemort Jr’s are finished their feedings.

Edited July 8, 2018 by Baby Button Eyes

[Lunera]

3 hours ago, sATL said:

wonder of Jim Bob is giving fatherly advice to Gil Bates on how to get the sons down the aisle quick and in a hurry.. JB managed to get 3 sons married - actually 2 in a row. I think Josiah is younger than the next in line trio - Lawson, Nathan, Trace

Gil doesn't seem in a hurry to get his kids married, he actually wants his daughters to be provided for before he allows the guys to propose. He's not making it easy either by offering up houses. As for the guys, I think he wants them to enjoy their youth and get real jobs before being saddled down with a wife and kids. Also, they seem really immature and more interested in hanging out with the guys than looking girlfriends. Lawson and Nathan could have their pick of any fundy girl when they're ready.

[Heathen]

7 hours ago, Wishing Well said:

Meanwhile this dude here named himself Jim Bob

I seriously doubt Jim Bob "named himself" Jim Bob. It was a nickname his parents gave him. If it doesn't bother him, why should he change it? 

4 hours ago, zenme said:

Wow! Joy sure has inherited Michelle style breasts. Or perhaps Deanna style?

She's also got turtle power going on, just like Mullet. 

[mynextmistake]

On 7/6/2018 at 12:59 PM, Christina87 said:

I agree with this so much! Joy's wedding was a total joke, but she and Austin did seem to have some kind of spark (which has totally gone away) when they were flipping houses prior to the wedding, and joy kept making constant, CONSTANT remarks about how they'd have to leave the reception early. There seemed to be some element of "this is as good as it's going to get for me, so I might as well focus on the positive and enjoy the things I can." I don't even see that in Josiah's wedding. Like you said, I see a deadline for him and brownie points for lauren. I really hope she is not horribly disappointed later in life, like when her younger sisters marry someone they are Jinger/Jeremy level hot for and she knows they are having great and frequent sex!

How can any of these kids be happy when they’re basically entering into arranged marriages? The world the Duggars live in is so narrow that they truly believe that all life is going to bring them is an early marriage to someone selected from a very narrow pool of suitable candidates followed by years and years of childrearing and eating tater tot casserole every night to make ends meet. And even that depressing life must sound better than the only other option, which is basically turning into Jana and spending their life cooking meals and raising kids for someone else. Either way they’re in prison, but at least by marrying they’re choosing their own guards. If the Duggar kids had had a normal (or even fundie-lite) upbringing that allowed them to experience life and date more than one person, I very much doubt that any of these couples (except Joe and Kendra and possibly Jinger and Jeremy) would have ended up together. When you get right down to it, most of then Duggar kids are really not well-matched to their spouses in any meaningful way. 

It’s really infuriating that 19 kids were forced to live in a world this small because Jim Bob couldn’t get over the fact that Michelle had necked with another boy at the movies when she was 16.

[Loves2Dance]

On 7/8/2018 at 1:50 AM, Lunera said:

Gil doesn't seem in a hurry to get his kids married, he actually wants his daughters to be provided for before he allows the guys to propose. He's not making it easy either by offering up houses. As for the guys, I think he wants them to enjoy their youth and get real jobs before being saddled down with a wife and kids. Also, they seem really immature and more interested in hanging out with the guys than looking girlfriends. Lawson and Nathan could have their pick of any fundy girl when they're ready.

Nathan was in a courtship and she left him. Lawson posted a very pretty picture of Jana on instagram with a ;p and then deleted it 10 seconds later. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by Loves2Dance

[Heathen]

1 hour ago, Loves2Dance said:

Nathan was in a courtship and she left him. Lawson posted a very pretty picture of Jana on instagram with a ;p and then deleted it 10 seconds later. 

Why did Nathan's girlfriend courtship partner leave him? 

There have been as many rumors about Lawson's sexuality as there have been about Josiah's. 

[GeeGolly]

I watched the TLC birth episode of little Garret last night. The recording picked up some of 90 Day Fiance. I wonder if TLC got the idea, loosely, from the Duggars? The Duggar formula is 90 days from engagement give or take a few days, depending on the bride-to-be's menstrual cycle.

[Triple P]

5 hours ago, Heathen said:

Why did Nathan's girlfriend courtship partner leave him? 

There have been as many rumors about Lawson's sexuality as there have been about Josiah's. 

Irreconcilable differences. Ashley Sayler is a born and bred New Yorker. At some point she decided that a country life was not for her. 

[graefin]

6 minutes ago, Triple P said:

Irreconcilable differences. Ashley Sayler is a born and bred New Yorker. At some point she decided that a country life was not for her. 

Nathan has also shown in at least one clip to be an insufferable chauvinist ass, trying to dictate to his sister how her hair should be worn for her wedding day in opposition to how she actually wanted it. So I don't blame Ashley for getting out while she could. 

[leighdear]

For all it's negative connotations, matching up 2 young people with similar backgrounds, religious training, education levels, family composition, age, experiences and economic background doesn't sound terribly bizzare. 

In fact, with the divorce rate as high as it is for couples that just wanted to bang each other & then eventually make it legal, their fundie match-ups sound pretty logical.   And long engagements certainly don't prevent divorce. 

I'd say Si & Lauren have as good, if not better odds than most couples.  Our society has just grown to accept that the more choices we have, the better ones we make.  I can't say that's always been true for me. 

[mythoughtis]

Quote

 

For all it's negative connotations, matching up 2 young people with similar backgrounds, religious training, education levels, family composition, age, experiences and economic background doesn't sound terribly bizzare. 

Not if you then allow them time to actually get to know one another without third parties interfering. Do you really think they can have actual frank honest conversations with 9 year old children or their own parents within listening distance? Do you really think they feel they can even trust each other to keep their spoken wishes for their life confidential from the parents if they break things off?   You can tell your boyfriend you don’t want kids for 10 years or you don’t like your religion. What do you think happens if a Duggar finds that out? 

I have no problem with matchmakers setting up compatible adults who have been around long enough to know what they want out of life. . But these folks don’t let the prospective couple be honest with themselves, each other, or a matchmaker. The couple also has no clue what they want out of life because they haven’t  yet experienced any. 

6 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I watched the TLC birth episode of little Garret last night. The recording picked up some of 90 Day Fiance. I wonder if TLC got the idea, loosely, from the Duggars? The Duggar formula is 90 days from engagement give or take a few days, depending on the bride-to-be's menstrual cycle.

90 days is the amount of time a K-1 VISA allows someone into the country prior to marriage. You either get married by then or you are  overstaying your VISA. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by mythoughtis

[Loves2Dance]

8 hours ago, Heathen said:

Why did Nathan's girlfriend courtship partner leave him? 

There have been as many rumors about Lawson's sexuality as there have been about Josiah's. 

http://uptv.com/shows/bringing-up-bates/videos/bates-exclusive-video-break-up-or-make-up/

Here is the video where it was addressed. No solid reason was given. But Ashley didn't want the country life. And if I were to wager a guess, Nathan is as a big of d*ck in real life as he is on camera and she didn't want to deal with that for the rest of her life. Of all the Bates boys, Nathan is the absolute worst. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by Loves2Dance

[frenchtoast]

Let's return to Josiah and Lauren, please. 

[EVS]

I remember that he wore a cowboy hat when he went ice skating, I think it was, with Ashley in NY.  It didn’t make sense to me because I didn’t remember him wearing one back home. I’m not sure what he was trying to do, or what point he was trying to make, but I thought it was kind of obnoxious. Having since seen the way he treated Tori about her wedding hairstyle, I think he is a controlling jerk and Ashley was smart to break up with him.

[Fuzzysox]

It's been a week now and still no pictures of the couple at their wedding or honeymoon. Wonder what gives because it's not like them to post pictures.

[EVS]

4 hours ago, leighdear said:

For all it's negative connotations, matching up 2 young people with similar backgrounds, religious training, education levels, family composition, age, experiences and economic background doesn't sound terribly bizzare. 

In fact, with the divorce rate as high as it is for couples that just wanted to bang each other & then eventually make it legal, their fundie match-ups sound pretty logical.   And long engagements certainly don't prevent divorce. 

I'd say Si & Lauren have as good, if not better odds than most couples.  Our society has just grown to accept that the more choices we have, the better ones we make.  I can't say that's always been true for me. 

Coming from an ethnic background, I have seen both sides. If you can find someone that you are truly compatible with who happens to have a similar background and understands where you are coming from (your childhood, your values, your religion, etc.), it can make things easier in many ways. 

However, I have many friends who initially got engaged or married to people they thought they should be with just because of that shared background, but they really weren’t compatible. Each one broke up and moved on to someone with a very different background, but that they were more compatible with. Their stronger bond helped them navigate the differences and most have been together as long as my compatible same-ethnicity/social group friends.

Eta, with the Duggars, I don’t think they give their children the time and opportunity to figure out which group they and their intended spouse belong to. Some of them end up compatible with their arranged spouse, but some don’t  (Anna and Josh for example) yet are stuck because divorce is such a stigma in their religion. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by EVS
Periods belong at the end of sentences.

[rue721]

On 7/6/2018 at 10:55 PM, mythoughtis said:

I, for one, have absolutely no idea if Josiah is gay.  We’ve never been shown anything that would make us think he was.  I’m not going to assume that bow ties, a sense of style, a little sensitivity and a  slight body type means that.  I think it more likely that Josiah got a case of nerves and cold feet because THIS IS FOREVER and he barely knows her. He actually has a brain as opposed to most of the rest of his family. 

Yes, I have no idea about whether Josiah is gay, either. What I do think is notable is that Josiah was sent to ALERT for a very long time and has seemed like a shell of himself since, and to be honest, that does make me wonder whether he was subjected to conversion therapy. He's now showing up in his wedding pictures looking like he's minutes away from locking himself in the bathroom for a good cry and standing next to Anna 2.0, which only reinforces the idea further in my mind that this marriage is meant to be some kind of cure/atonement for Josiah, just like Josh's for Anna was apparently meant to be.

It's not that I think that Josiah "seems" gay but I think he seems to have been disciplined extremely harshly even into adulthood, like his parents hate something innate to him and tried to rip out that part of him by force, and it gets my blood boiling. Especially when I think of how harshly he's apparently been "corrected," in contrast to Josh's consequences for molesting his sisters. Who knows what Josiah's grand crime is, but given this family's twisted values, I highly suspect it's something that us on the outside would think is not a crime at all, like that he's got an offbeat, spunky personality or isn't blindly obedient or has "questioned" his gender or sexuality or had a crisis of faith at some point or JB just took a dislike to him. Because of course these people would treat someone just being themselves as a capital offense.

I'm straight and I would be devastated if I were being strong-armed into an arranged marriage with someone who was supposed to "cure" me of my personality, and on pain of eternal torment, too. I genuinely have no idea why it is that the Duggars treat Josiah like their problem child, even relative to Josh, but whatever the reason, I think their handling of him is almost certainly cruel and misguided.

11 hours ago, mynextmistake said:

How can any of these kids be happy when they’re basically entering into arranged marriages?

I think these kidults have been trained extremely harshly to only do and think as they're told. How their parents have managed that, I don't know. I mean, once upon a time Joy was her own person, too -- and then she disappeared off with Mama for just a week or so and came back the semi-functioning robot she is even now.

It's honestly a mystery to me how the Duggar parents brainwash these kids, but they are very successful at it. Even the ones who they don't manage to squash the individuality out of completely come back muted and like some essential part of them is missing, like they've been very literally torn apart and only half-assed put back together again.

If anyone has any resources or anecdotes about what exactly is going on there (not just with the Duggars, but with this sort of fundamentalist brainwashing generally), I'd actually be very interested in learning more. From the outside, it's like watching a horror movie.

4 hours ago, leighdear said:

For all it's negative connotations, matching up 2 young people with similar backgrounds, religious training, education levels, family composition, age, experiences and economic background doesn't sound terribly bizzare.

Those commonalities are important, but from how I understand it, personality is usually a pretty big factor in arranging marriages, too. The idea isn't just that you'd be compatible with anyone from your same background, it's that your parents and community understand you at least as well as you understand yourself and so they're a fantastic resource for finding/choosing a potential match.

Some sects care more about just getting the baby factory up and running than they do about the marriage itself or either partner's happiness, though, and those sects will often just throw people together. Hasidic Jews have a bad reputation for doing that. I think that's what's happening with the Duggars, too -- but some of the kidults have more leeway than others (JD) and some just get luckier than others (Joe).

I probably wouldn't be as pessimistic about Josiah and Lauren's relationship as I am, except that it's impossible not to compare them to Josiah and Marjorie -- a couple who actually did seem very well matched in terms of personality. I wasn't surprised when they broke up because I can't imagine Marjorie being OK with being barefoot and pregnant a la the Duggar daughters, she's got so much spunk. But she and Josiah seemed very compatible as people. Josiah and Lauren's connection really suffers in comparison. This doesn't seem anything like a love match. From either of their sides, frankly.

[EVS]

@rue721, from my (non-fundie) experience, it is easier than you would think. The isolation and control begins at birth so the children have no idea how to think for themselves but doesn’t even realize it. They think things are their idea when it is really the parents. The parent tell them that they are special and better than anyone else, including other relatives, because they are being raised this way. Anyone doing ‘normal’ childhood and young adult experiences is severely criticized and judged.  Any adults who are not raising their children the same way are dangerous and terrible parents. My relative told her kids that their gay cousins were that way because the parents raised them too liberal, meaning gave them too many choices and let them make their own decisions. It works really well if the children have naturally compliant personalities like my relative’s kids. With a non-compliant kid like Josiah, I think they basically beat the rebellion out of them physically and/or emotionally until it just isn’t worth it to rebel. 

Edited July 9, 2018 by EVS

[GeeGolly]

While I don't think any of the Duggar marriages were arranged, I think the problem with the quick meet-to-marriage, is these kids don't even know themselves, never mind another person in six short months.

They've never been exposed to anything that might give them a clue to their own identity. Josiah, like his siblings have been raised to be 'a certain Christian'. Even when the parents say a kid has an interest, the interests usually remain superficial and all are within, across the board, Fundy approval-land. 

Fundy woman: midwifery, photography, teaching, sewing, music, etc.

Fundy men: landscaping, cars, mechanics, real estate, flying, etc.

All Fundies: a heart for the Lord, God fearing, serving others, chaste, simple, self-sacrificing, modest, etc.

Like I said, I don't think the problem is that Josiah doesn't know Lauren, the problem is Josiah doesn't know himself.

[libgirl2]

6 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

While I don't think any of the Duggar marriages were arranged, I think the problem with the quick meet-to-marriage, is these kids don't even know themselves, never mind another person in six short months.

They've never been exposed to anything that might give them a clue to their own identity. Josiah, like his siblings have been raised to be 'a certain Christian'. Even when the parents say a kid has an interest, the interests usually remain superficial and all are within, across the board, Fundy approval-land. 

Fundy woman: midwifery, photography, teaching, sewing, music, etc.

Fundy men: landscaping, cars, mechanics, real estate, flying, etc.

All Fundies: a heart for the Lord, God fearing, serving others, chaste, simple, self-sacrificing, modest, etc.

Like I said, I don't think the problem is that Josiah doesn't know Lauren, the problem is Josiah doesn't know himself.

I think you put it the right way. Quick marriages can be successful, but when they marry so young, I don't think they know enough about themselves. No JD and Abby I have a feeling having a more advanced age and having been out in the real world doing something (at least Abby), I think they know more about themselves and have a better chance at being happy. 

[Christina87]

I've been thinking a lot about Josiah, and I know this may be an unpopular opinion, but sometimes, it's a good thing to buy into stereotypes. Of course, you can't tell someone's sexuality for sure from their looks and demeanor, and there have been more straight people than anyone could count over the years who looked stereotypically gay. However, as a musician, I have known many, many women (including myself!) who have dated closeted gay guys within the music community because we were trying not to judge them, reasoning that if they were asking us out, then must be straight, or they are so "stereotypically gay" that if they were actually gay, they would just admit it, etc etc. Every time these relationships end in heartbreak, it's so easy to look back and be like, "duh! He's soooooo gay! How did she miss the signs?!" I think it's beginning to be less of a problem now in mainstream society, since being gay is accepted and more people are coming out of the closet, but I would be careful in a repressed society like fundamentalism. If I were lauren, I would be extremely wary! I'm not saying at all to go out and assume people are gay or straight based on their looks, because there are a lot of factors that go into how people present themselves, and it shouldn't matter to you anyway unless you are planning to date the person. However, I have known so many women who had their hearts broken after a long, serious relationship with a gay guy, or even sometimes unrequited love that the guy encourages because he likes the attention! Even short term things can give women issues when they know their boyfriend isn't attracted to them. Staying in the closet is rampant in fundamentalism, but also in church musician culture. Many churches, even mainstream denominations that accept that people are gay, would frown on having gay people on their staff, and many a church organist or choir director has felt afraid to come out, or even like they needed to try a sham marriage! All of these issues, with very few exceptions, could have been avoided if the woman had gone with her first instinct of, "oh wow, my gaydar is going off! Maybe I'll just stay friends with this guy." I really hope I haven't offended anyone, because I think however people want to look/dress/present themselves is fine, and I have a close male friend who "seems" gay (for reasons that he can't even change if he wanted to either...high pitched voice and musical talent), and I have watched him struggle over the years with being shot down by women and treated like a joke by men. His story has a happy ending with a wonderful wife, but I definitely hate the judgment he has faced. Still, I would be careful if I were in the fundie world. It's not good to judge people, but sometimes it's a good idea to listen to your gut feelings!

Edited July 9, 2018 by Christina87

[Fuzzysox]

What Josiah's world is really like:

He was forced to get married.

JB did not accept him the way he was, way too spunky.

Josiah couldn't think of a way out.

He must make this work, it's all he knows. He will be completely cut off if he doesn't "conform."

Josiah will spend many nights crying in the bathroom.

He will have a hoard of children for Jesus. He will never live his truth.

He has become just like all the other cult members.

[BitterApple]

The Alert stints may not have had anything to do with suspect sexuality. For all we know, Josiah asked to take a few community college classes and Boob and Michelle flew into a panic. It seems like it wouldn't take much to be viewed as rebellious or a problem child with this crowd. 

[Happyfatchick]

I can’t tell you how many times 5is week I’ve thought “I wonder if she’s pregnant yet?”

[queenanne]

6 hours ago, rue721 said:

Yes, I have no idea about whether Josiah is gay, either. What I do think is notable is that Josiah was sent to ALERT for a very long time and has seemed like a shell of himself since, and to be honest, that does make me wonder whether he was subjected to conversion therapy. He's now showing up in his wedding pictures looking like he's minutes away from locking himself in the bathroom for a good cry and standing next to Anna 2.0, which only reinforces the idea further in my mind that this marriage is meant to be some kind of cure/atonement for Josiah, just like Josh's for Anna was apparently meant to be.

It's not that I think that Josiah "seems" gay but I think he seems to have been disciplined extremely harshly even into adulthood, like his parents hate something innate to him and tried to rip out that part of him by force, and it gets my blood boiling. Especially when I think of how harshly he's apparently been "corrected," in contrast to Josh's consequences for molesting his sisters. Who knows what Josiah's grand crime is, but given this family's twisted values, I highly suspect it's something that us on the outside would think is not a crime at all, like that he's got an offbeat, spunky personality or isn't blindly obedient or has "questioned" his gender or sexuality or had a crisis of faith at some point or JB just took a dislike to him. Because of course these people would treat someone just being themselves as a capital offense.

I'm straight and I would be devastated if I were being strong-armed into an arranged marriage with someone who was supposed to "cure" me of my personality, and on pain of eternal torment, too. I genuinely have no idea why it is that the Duggars treat Josiah like their problem child, even relative to Josh, but whatever the reason, I think their handling of him is almost certainly cruel and misguided.

I think these kidults have been trained extremely harshly to only do and think as they're told. How their parents have managed that, I don't know. I mean, once upon a time Joy was her own person, too -- and then she disappeared off with Mama for just a week or so and came back the semi-functioning robot she is even now.

It's honestly a mystery to me how the Duggar parents brainwash these kids, but they are very successful at it. Even the ones who they don't manage to squash the individuality out of completely come back muted and like some essential part of them is missing, like they've been very literally torn apart and only half-assed put back together again.

If anyone has any resources or anecdotes about what exactly is going on there (not just with the Duggars, but with this sort of fundamentalist brainwashing generally), I'd actually be very interested in learning more. From the outside, it's like watching a horror movie.

I think the clue lies in your, "treat someone just being themselves as a capital offense".  You're not allowed to have a personality, because "personality" is next door to "rebel"; and because "one size fits all" has to be the operational mold; when stupid unimaginative people need to tamp down imaginative and intelligent creatives, and don't have any intelligence or creativity in their handling methods ("do this because the Bible says so").  Plus, you're surrounded by dozens of snitches, in the Duggars' case quite literally. 

If you had someone telling you that everything you did was wrong, or disrespectful, or "other", and were remotely sensitive, you too would realize it was safer not to do or say anything after a while.  If you're a sturdy type with skin like elephant hide, you continue on your merry rebel way, but that's exhausting.  It's exhausting to spend your entire life second-guessing if half your friends and neighbors are going to score you for "immodest dress", "not being content enough", not sprinkling your daily conversation with buzzwords every chance you get, etc.  You can't speak off-the-cuff, and you can't think in less than lockstep, because then you're going to "speak before you think" and then wind up betraying what you really feel in your speech; because in your thoughts it seems "natural".  Why don't the young Duggars make plans to just up and leave, if they're rebels, you might ask?  I really don't know why and how it doesn't rankle in them nonstop and 24-7, making them miserable.  I was planning my escape from the authoritarian thumb of fundiehood at age fourteen.

[graefin]

So a video was just posted thanking everyone post-wedding:

Why does Lauren look and sound like she is on the verge of bawling her eyes out?! Surely this is not normal for her? If it is, no wonder Josiah has looked as depressed as he has.

Edited July 10, 2018 by graefin

[McManda]

Wow, what an awkward kiss. Why did she pull back like there was nothing less she wanted than to kiss him? Other than, well, they still don't know each other well and they're expected to go from 0 to 100 in a hot second.

That's the only video I've bothered to watch of them together and ... I have no words other than awkward.

And why oh why do they make videos thanking the fans (or family or whatever) and then talk to each other? Address the camera and stop looking over at your partner every 5 seconds!

[Sew Sumi]

Well, that was painful. 

[bigskygirl]

I seen happier people going in for a colonoscopy.

[Christina87]

Lauren. Speaks. So. Slowly. And. She. Can't. Ever. Get. Around. To. The. Point. 

That would drive me crazy! She seems more intelligent than joy at least, who can't string a sentence together. I don't think intelligence is the problem. She acts like every. Word. Must. Be. The. Absolute. Perfect. One. And if she doesn't phrase everything perfectly, she's doomed. It doesn't seem like a thing for the cameras, either. Seems too much like a habit!

[asuwur]

I don't know. I'd probably be crushed and in tears if every web page I looked at about the famous (*cough*) family I married into was covered in posts that my new husband clearly doesn't love me and has no desire to schtup me. She's a kid and those kinds of words would cut like a knife. YMMV

[graefin]

I mean, if I had to listen to that breathy, sighy voice spoken barely above a whisper all day? Just no. As far as speech affectations go, I'd take Michelle's high-pitched baby squeals instead. Or an hour in the dentist chair. It's a toss up. 

[zoomama]

to me, it sounded like she had memorized her words and was trying to get them out in the correct order.

[BitterApple]

Lauren is a pretty girl, but OMG, her personality is grating as hell. Just speak normally, ffs. I agree she sounded like she was about to burst into tears at any second. I wonder how disastrous the wedding night was?

"Marriage is a blessing from the Lord."

Cool, Si. Now repeat that on a continuous loop for the next 50 years and maybe at some point you'll believe it.

[lookeyloo]

She has always looked to me like she just finished crying, in all of her pictures.  Maybe that's the way she looks?  Sad.  No sparks.

[Happyfatchick]

I don’t think she’s pretty, but that’s just me.  Her voice sure sounds like she’s choking back tears.  Is that how she always sounds?

[Lunera]

Wow... such a difference from Joe and Kendra's fist video after marriage. Joe looked so happy and Kendra was giggly. This video was cringey as fuck. Lauren no longer has that smile she had during her wedding video, it almost looks like she was forced to make this video. She even pulled back from the kiss. Josiah must have read all the comments about Lauren's creepy headship stare because he's doing the same thing to her here. 

[xwordfanatik]

So sad!  JoKen and JinJer make these two look like they were forced to marry, or they were told they would be damned to hell for all eternity.

If they managed to "hey hey hey" she's probably pregnant already.  Whatever, they're stuck in what seems to be a mismatch, to say the least.

[Scarlett45]

6 hours ago, Christina87 said:

 

I've been thinking a lot about Josiah, and I know this may be an unpopular opinion, but sometimes, it's a good thing to buy into stereotypes. Of course, you can't tell someone's sexuality for sure from their looks and demeanor, and there have been more straight people than anyone could count over the years who looked stereotypically gay. However, as a musician, I have known many, many women (including myself!) who have dated closeted gay guys within the music community because we were trying not to judge them, reasoning that if they were asking us out, then must be straight, or they are so "stereotypically gay" that if they were actually gay, they would just admit it, etc etc.

 

So much word! Been there sweetie. 

As a woman who’s always assumed to be a lesbian but who’s heterosexual I’m wary to label someone’s sexual orientation until they have told me themselves. Josiah may or may not be gay, (or bi or pan or whatever) but SOMETHING in his eyes changed after he went to Alert all those years ago he did NOT look happy to be marrying Lauren at all. Not at all. It’s going to be a long life if he truly did not want to marry her. I hope for her sake he doesn’t take it out on her and she doesn’t blame herself. 

[awaken]

She definitely seems like she’s been crying, or is holding back tears. And they sound like they’re (badly) reading off of cue cards. 

I really wonder what exactly happens at Alert?  Does anyone have more detail?  

[graefin]

It's also interesting the about-face this video has done from the previous one of them right after the wedding. In that one, Lauren was giddy and affectionate and Josiah was straight-faced and more somber. Here Josiah seems at ease (which is the closest we've seen him to happy so far) and initiates a kiss while Lauren seems upset and to be barely holding it together and withdraws from Josiah's show of affection. 

I agree they wrote out and tried to memorize a script and Lauren struggled with the words. But this was beyond that. I think the bloom is quite possibly off the rose for her. And they're not even back from the honeymoon yet. 

[louannems]

That video was truly awful.  It could have been a snark of themselves.