Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Lunera]

Oh, Jill. STFU!!!

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

Jill,

Stick to posting pics of your kids.  Stay far away from this.  

You are not going to make it any better.  

KThanksBye.

[GeeGolly]

Loving, caring or being friends with someone does not include calling their life style a "travesty". Redirecting or disciplining one's child is not the same as calling someone else's child a "myth" whose parents are "taking advantage" of her. And calling folks out on Twitter is the epitome of judgement.

Just saying.

Edited May 7, 2018 by GeeGolly

[madpsych78]

Maybe she's talking about how she disagrees with Derick.

Yeah, that was a silly sentence. 

Disagreeing with someone does not ALWAYS equal hate, but it CAN equal hate. In stats terms, there's no correlation.

[EVS]

Dear Jill, 

To Disagree doesn’t = hate or judgment, unless you attack or judge the person you disagree with. It’s how you disagree that sets the tone.  And attacking children or calling them names or dragging them into your disagreement is both hateful and judgmental and crosses a line that no adult claiming to be a Christian should ever cross. 

Also, your husband is a grown-ass man, so your analogy using your children is pointless. 

Edited May 7, 2018 by EVS

[ginger90]

Of course Derick retweeted Jill’s post.

Do either of them realize that disagreeing doesn’t =hate, works both ways? Nope, to them it is bullying.

As far as judgement, I am surprised she included that word. 

Perhaps she substituted “my husband”, with “my child”?

Edited May 7, 2018 by ginger90

[Sew Sumi]

What a poor analogy in defense of Derelict's actions. Disagreement with a child has nothing to do with attacking a transgender teen or a same-sex family.

[EVS]

Ok. I reread her last paragraph. I misunderstood it the first time.  I still feel her analogy using her child is irrelevant because a parent (hopefully) loves their child unconditionally. The people Derick is attacking are not his children, they are someone else’s children or adults he does not know. He is not friends with them, he doesn’t love them. He has made no attempt to get to know or understand them. Therefore, it is not his place to judge them, and by calling them names publicly, he is indeed judging them.   

[Temperance]

She or Derick said something before similar to what Lunera posted .  The idea that they have serious ideological disagreements with a toddler annoys me to no end.  There's a big difference between someone with grown children or even teenage children having a discussion on an issue where you have different points of view and a caretaker arguing with a little kid about naptime, picking something up, etc. 

Of course also implies that she and Derick are all-knowing and right and know what bests for everyone (as in they're the parents) and we're the little kids they're humoring and teaching what's right.  Yeah, right. 

Edited May 7, 2018 by Temperance

[DragonFaerie]

4 minutes ago, Temperance said:

Of course also implies that she and Derick are all-knowing and right and know what bests for everyone (as in they're the parents) and we're the little kids they're humoring and teaching what's right.  Yeah, right. 

I read that last part as ' the little kids they're humoring and teaching what's right. YYAAAAAAYYYY, right.  Yes, in Jill's voice on that word.  Shudders.  Obviously I need booze.

[Portia]

3 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Loving, caring or being friends with someone does not include calling their life style a "travesty".

Not their "life style." Their lives. Their very lives.

[GeeGolly]

12 minutes ago, Portia said:

Not their "life style." Their lives. Their very lives.

Yup. My bad. Thanks!

[tabloidlover]

I am quite enjoying the fact that People magazine has an article about Jill’s latest defense of #besthubbyever.   Especially the part where they again state that the Dillards were FIRED from TLC ?

[EVS]

10 minutes ago, tabloidlover said:

I am quite enjoying the fact that People magazine has an article about Jill’s latest defense of #besthubbyever.   Especially the part where they again state that the Dillards were FIRED from TLC ?

I didn’t know that. Thanks. I’m going to read it now. 

[ChiCricket]

2 hours ago, tabloidlover said:

Especially the part where they again state that the Dillards were FIRED from TLC ?

Yaaaaay!?

[Annb67]

See here's the thing Jill; if you call my child a myth, if you say I'm using my child and harming them, if you say my beliefs are perverted and going to send me to hell, you and I are not going to PF Chang's for lunch and a movie afterwards.

[MargeGunderson]

When I was 13/14, my mom wrote me a letter that included the phrase “I love you but I don’t like you.” I was not the quiet, obedient with out question, stereotypically feminine girl that she wanted. That has stayed with me for for more than 30 years. I do not have a close relationship with my mother and she can’t figure out why.

So, Jill and Derrick, I can tell you from first hand experience that your disappointment in your children not being what you want them to be - not approving of them - regardless of whether you love them, can be very damaging. 

Edited May 9, 2018 by MargeGunderson

[Celia Rubenstein]

I made a longer post about what Jill said in the media thread because I read about it there first. But I wanted to mention here in her thread that rather than defending Derrick, I think Jill is trying to distance herself from his behavior on Twitter by saying she can love her son and still not approve of or agreed with what he does. She's talking about her husband but just used the word son for obvious reasons. She's teetering on the brink of defying her headship.

I don't think she is really defending Derrick at all. 

Edited May 8, 2018 by Celia Rubenstein

[Lunera]

16 hours ago, Temperance said:

She or Derick said something before similar to what Lunera posted .

 

Yes, Derdick wrote a whole blog post about it last year after having bashed Jazz and her family several times. Funny that he mentions that everyone should be treated fairly under the law but when someone on Twitter told him that gay mariage was legal under the law he said something like 'the law doesnt reflect what everyone wants'.

Quote

There’s been a lot of talk lately about how divisive America has become. This isn’t new in the world; divisiveness is as old as the human race. It’s not new, but it is destructive. Lincoln recognized this a century and a half ago. What is unique, is this experiment called the United States of America. No other country in history has had such progress and success as America. We can thank our founding fathers for constructing a constitution that’s founded on principles of freedom, protection, justice, and truth. If our generation is going to, not only benefit from, but also improve our country, we’ve got to maintain those same principles. They’re not outdated, they’re timeless and are proven through time.

With these constitutional principles in mind, it serves to remind ourselves that:

Just because you don’t agree with someone, doesn’t mean you hate them. What one thinks of someone’s idea or actions really doesn’t serve at all, to tell what they think of them personally, one way or the other. For example, I disagree with about 95% of what my son does or suggests that I do (“Get out of the car!” as we’re going 70mph down the highway), yet I love him dearly! I disagree with my wife far less than my son, and I also love her very much. It’s not bigotry, fascism, etc… to exercise one’s right of free speech.

It’s not a problem that someone has different beliefs than you, or that they’re LGBT, or that they do anything else other than what you agree with. That’s the beauty of America, that we have the freedom to make personal choices, within a civilized society of law and order.  All people should be treated equally before the law, plain and simple. If you do bad stuff, you should pay the consequences regardless of who you are. One’s consequences, good or bad, should be based on actions, not identity.

Capitalism is great. If you agree/ disagree with some product/ idea, you can choose not to support it or even freely encourage others to support/ not support that same thing. They can then think about it and then choose whether they agree/ don’t agree with you and choose to support/ not support that same product/ idea and then be on their merry way. (e.g. politics, proselytizing, business, etc.…) The result of such freedom usually leads to good things.

So much of what divides America today seems to be an attack on one of our basic principles, ones that can be easily taken for granted. If you’ve taken these bedrock principles for granted, it only serves to show how effective these principles have been in constructing the great society we live in (e.g. detachment from the plight of those who don’t have the same recourses afforded to Americans). However, if this is you, please do not continue to take your American heritage for granted. It’s important to remember that ALL Americans have this heritage in common, whether you’ve been a citizen for one day or your family’s been here 500 years, regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, country of origin, religion, disability, age, or any other point of differentiation. It only takes a look through history or across the globe to know that we have something great here, that we need to take the baton and continue to steward this well. America’s definitely not perfect, but we should aim for progression not regression, with our founding principles in mind.

—Derick Dillard

Edited May 8, 2018 by Lunera
Added stuff

[Trillium]

This is so dumb. This isn’t the equivalent of “I like Pepsi but my wife likes Coke” it’s “I like Pepsi and if you like Coke I think you’re a travesty to humanity”. That is a deeply personal attack not just a difference of opinion. And he apparently feels that he can say such things because free speech but someone calling him out is pushing  a “liberal agenda”. So he’s not pushing a conservative  agenda? How come it’s ok for him to push his beliefs but not “liberals” And I put liberals in quotations because these days it just means being a decent human being. He’s just the worst. 

Edited May 8, 2018 by Trillium
Phone changed conservative to cinder. Because that makes zero sense.

[MargeGunderson]

15 minutes ago, Trillium said:

This is so dumb. This isn’t the equivalent of “I like Pepsi but my wife likes Coke” it’s “I like Pepsi and if you like Coke I think you’re a travesty to humanity”. That is a deeply personal attack not just a difference of opinion. And he apparently feels that he can say such things because free speech but someone calling him out is pushing  a “liberal agenda”. So he’s not pushing a cinder agenda? How come it’s ok for him to push his beliefs but not “liberals” And I put liberals in quotations because these days it just means being a decent human being. He’s just the worst. 

Much of what advocates for actively curtails the rights of others. He’s free to not enter into a gay marriage if he doesn’t like it, but he wants to deny other people that right based on his beliefs. I find it highly hypocritical (but not in the least surprising) for Derrick to praise the US for valuing freedom when he supports efforts to curtail those freedoms. 

[Tabbygirl521]

On 4/26/2018 at 3:31 PM, ginger90 said:

Infant Car Seat Trick

Apr 26, 2018 | Family Blog | 0 

My Mama taught me this trick about infant car seats! I use it when I know we are gonna be in tight spaces and I don’t wanna pull out the big stroller. Super easy!

Link to video is in tweet:

What the heck? Why not use the little stroller by itself and not bother wrestling the car seat in and out of the car? And yeah, it looks pretty top heavy. Sorry for the late comment; I have been away from the boards. 

[Tabbygirl521]

On 5/4/2018 at 7:25 AM, TresGatos said:

I think this is what a lot of guys are concerned about after a vasectomy. Hee. The doctor told my 32 year old husband he had to wait until our 2nd was a year old before they would do a vasectomy for him. Our 3rd child is 15 months younger than his brother. He didn't make him wait after that.

Now here is what's been bothering about Derdick since yesterday. All this talk about accepting yourself as God makes you. How does that square with Derdick's jaw surgery and braces? If God made him that way and is Derdick is in pain that's because God is testing him like he tested Job and by trying to fix the "mistake" God made isn't he subverting the Will of God and thus is being willful and disobedient to God? Same with Cathy. When God gave her cancer why did she fight it? When she stands in Judgement before the Lord and he says, "Cathy, My child, I tried to call you Home but you resisted me? Why?" How will she explain fighting the Will of God and instead insert her judgement for His and being willful and disobedient by trying to fix God's "mistake" and seeking aggressive treatment?  I guess I am inserting my own flawed human judgement for God's own perfect judgement every time I choose to wear eyeglasses so I can see, pretty much a constant subversion the Will of God so obvious that even a blind person should be able to see it!

These people are infuriating!

Also, their God supposedly created us all as sinners, so should we stay that way?

[Natalie68]

21 hours ago, MyPeopleAreNordic said:

Jill,

Stick to posting pics of your kids.  Stay far away from this.  

You are not going to make it any better.  

KThanksBye.

Its kinda cute that they think they can win a war of words.  They would stand zero chances of winning an argument with anyone in these forums about any topic.

[ChiCricket]

Please notice the first comment on this Bates post. 0_o

 

[Lunera]

Since when does living in Nepal for 2 years make you and your children Nepalese? I guess it's how Izzy Salvadorian, too from Jill living there on and off 2 years. I bet Deena is sick of her shit.

[Bridget]

On 4/27/2018 at 8:53 PM, EarlGreyTea said:

Exactly my thoughts. Derick's only true tweet in all this mess was the one where he said "nothing about our family's views have changed." Make absolutely no mistake, they are all as ugly on the inside as he is and always have been, just in  a slightly prettier package. And with enough sense to realize their views are highly offensive. Or maybe not sense - just a willingness to hide their true feelings for a buck. Which is consistent with the Duggar doctrine.

I'm just glad Derick periodically loses his marbles, so I am reminded to never, ever put Counting On on the DVR. And to make a little donation to the ACLU and/or Planned Parenthood. Because the Lord has laid it on my heart.

I feel the need to send a check to PP this week...and I plan to do it in Derelict's name!

I don't Tweet or use social media for professional reasons, so I can't share this special and neat gift with him via Twitter, but maybe PP will send him a Thank You card?!

[doodlebug]

2 hours ago, Bridget said:

I feel the need to send a check to PP this week...and I plan to do it in Derelict's name!

I don't Tweet or use social media for professional reasons, so I can't share this special and neat gift with him via Twitter, but maybe PP will send him a Thank You card?!

They will if you tell them.  You can use one of his social media addresses and they most assuredly will notify him.  Or, look up Cross Church’ address and have them send it to him there c/o the church.  That should go over really well with the faculty at the mission school.

[Bridget]

4 hours ago, doodlebug said:

They will if you tell them.  You can use one of his social media addresses and they most assuredly will notify him.  Or, look up Cross Church’ address and have them send it to him there c/o the church.  That should go over really well with the faculty at the mission school.

You are THE best. Thank you for the info on how to make sure I’m able to donate to worthy causes in Derelict’s name.

I was also thinking I should also send donations to other charities or causes that I support (including The Trevor Project, politicians running for office, GLAAD, environmental groups) since my “Cafeteria Plan” heathen Catholic, public school teacher self is remembering that an intelligent and fashionable woman once reminded me to go high when Derelict goes low.

Edited May 9, 2018 by Bridget

[doodlebug]

39 minutes ago, Bridget said:

You are THE best. Thank you for the info on how to make sure I’m able to donate to worthy causes in Derelict’s name.

I was also thinking I should also send donations to other charities or causes that I support (including The Trevor Project, politicians running for office, GLAAD, environmental groups) since my “Cafeteria Plan” heathen Catholic, public school teacher self is remembering that an intelligent and fashionable woman once reminded me to go high when Derelict goes low.

Cross Church

2801 W McMillan Dr.
Fayetteville, AR 72701

[ginger90]

[Marshmallow Mollie]

5 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

It’s gross that he uses the Bible like this. 

It’s gross that Cross Church allows it. Evidently they only care about depositing checks.

[EVS]

Someone in the comments posted a non-KJV of this verse. It is different from what Derick is trying to imply. 

"Do not reprove a mocker or he will hate you;  reprove a wise person and he will love you." Derick is definitely a “mocker”, not a wise person.

Nice try to once again use the Bible for your own agenda, Derick. 

Derick Dillard: Counting On - Offensive Tweets

[Picture It. Sicily]

It floors me that no one has ever punched his sanctimonious face in. Just reading his tweets makes me want to clean his clock and I'm a pacifist. I can' imagine what would happen if I had all that know-it-all smugness right in front of me. Too bad Josh came first, because Smuggar is a great name for Deredick.

[graefin]

Someone posted this analysis of Jessa vs. Jill on FJ that I'm bringing over here because it's pretty on point:

Quote

I think the difference between Jessa and Jill boils down to one thing: humility.  Jessa actually has a bit of it.  Jill doesn't.

Initially, BOTH of them were nearly identical on social media, though Jill was a shade more savvy.  Early Jessa was cringe-inducing and polarizing.  She got a LOT of push back the way Jill is now getting push back.  

But she listened.  She learned.  And she changed.  And now, she's a fairly skilled social media mommy.  

Jill, on the other hand, is unable to listen to criticism and learn from it.  She and Derick respond defensively and double down and then continue to make the same mistakes, leading to another social media mini-meltdown.  Jill is unable to learn from negative feedback because she's unable to listen to criticism.  I think both she and Derick truly believe they are right and perfect and the best Golden Christians.  I get this same feeling sometimes when Jill interacts with her sisters or fundie friends: she ALWAYS takes some sort of position of superiority or authority, even when it's confusing for her to do so.  She's always giving unsolicited advice or acting like she has it all figured out.  And while I think part of it is a front, I think partially Jill, having spent so long as the Golden Duggar Daughter, really does believe that she is a bit "better" than others, especially other people who aren't good Christians like she is, and therefore doesn't need their advice.  That's also why she thinks other people ALWAYS need her advice, whether they are her sisters or the people she is "missioning" to.  They need to be blessed by her superior wisdom!

This is further why Jill struggles to show genuine, relatable moments: because she's too caught up in her "perfect" image.  Jessa, understanding that she is not perfect, realizes that by sharing her weaknesses too, she is able to relate better to others.  And that's why Jill's posts always fall flat: she's claiming to be THE BEST ALWAYS when she's posting things that are, at most, mediocre.  It's annoying and grating when Jill claims Derick is "the best hubby ever" for bringing her chocolate milk.  It would actually be a cute post if it were framed more "I love chocolate milk, and it's always a treat when my husband stops at the store on his way home and brings me some as a surprise.  It's the little things that make life so sweet "  Jessa frames things more like this and doesn't make EVERYTHING Ben does into #besthubbyever.  

If Jill would stop pretending that everything in her life is BETTER than everyone else's and instead focus on how things in her life are THE SAME as everyone else, she would be a lot more tolerable.  And I think that's what Jessa does REALLY well: she shows you the way her life is just like yours, even if you don't share her beliefs, even if you don't share her opinions, even if you don't share her politics.  And that makes her dangerous because it makes it easy to forget that on some level, she's NOT just like you: she believes in theocracy and will take steps to see her beliefs legislated.  

[lascuba]

16 hours ago, Lunera said:

Since when does living in Nepal for 2 years make you and your children Nepalese? I guess it's how Izzy Salvadorian, too from Jill living there on and off 2 years. I bet Deena is sick of her shit.

What kills me is that, in Spanish, first cousin = "cousin brother." But instead of totally fluent Jill jumping on that, she instead implies that Israel knows Nepalese because Derick's sperm absorbed the language when he lived there.

[GeeGolly]

Jill doesn't stop to think that Israel was probably told multiple times daily, for nine months, that soon he have a baby brother. And now he has a baby brother. He just hasn't figured out that the words don't always go together or that one of the words means baby.

[Christina87]

18 hours ago, Lunera said:

Since when does living in Nepal for 2 years make you and your children Nepalese? I guess it's how Izzy Salvadorian, too from Jill living there on and off 2 years. I bet Deena is sick of her shit.

Nice deflection, Jill! Methinks the point of telling this story is so everyone will know THAT was the baby Israel was talking about in that video with Sam, when he said something about having another baby. 

[satrunrose]

On 5/7/2018 at 6:38 PM, Lunera said:

Oh, Jill. STFU!!!

Whenever I read another of these posts from Jill and Derrick about "disagreeing" with their children, my heart just breaks for these little guys. Izzy. Is. 3. He is not discussing the merits of vegetarianism or interpretations of Leviticus. Good grief, if the message he's getting at. 3. when he says No! to eating his vegetables is a gritted teeth "I love you and forgive you and don't hate you." What's going to happen when he's old enough to actually argue? Are they mad at him because he hasn't broken The Pecan Thief's preschool repentance record yet?

[ginger90]

“Do we have a future Bollywood star in the family?!  In this video, you can tell Samuel is enjoying his Indian food and music! “

[awaken]

I’m very surprised that he has on a “ladies I have arrived “ bib!  Quite forward!

and, of course Deena is posing with her hands on top and bottom of her bump. 

[louannems]

I watched the Sam video and I smiled through the whole thing.  He is swaying in time to the Napale music and enjoying his curry.

At least Jill didn't bind his arms for dancing to the music. JB and Michelle would have shown their disapproval!

[queenanne]

2 hours ago, louannems said:

I watched the Sam video and I smiled through the whole thing.  He is swaying in time to the Napale music and enjoying his curry.

At least Jill didn't bind his arms for dancing to the music. JB and Michelle would have shown their disapproval!

I liked his goggling in surprise at each successive bite.  Contemplating his tenth was as exciting to him as contemplating his first!  

[Triple P]

9 hours ago, awaken said:

I’m very surprised that he has on a “ladies I have arrived “ bib!  Quite forward!

Oh come on! You know Cathy thinks her sons/grandsons are total studs! ?...?

Edited May 10, 2018 by Triple P
Need more coffee.

[TresGatos]

15 hours ago, ginger90 said:

“Do we have a future Bollywood star in the family?!  In this video, you can tell Samuel is enjoying his Indian food and music! “

HE LOOKS A BIT LIKE HIS COUSIN gIDEON IN THIS PHOTO.

[theironwoman]

What no one has been able to explain to me when they pull this 'hate the sin, love the sinner' nonsense is why they feel their input on the matter is needed or valuable in any way.

[floridamom]

Why would Jill feed Sammy Indian food? I understand it is very spicy hot. I don't think that's a good idea at his age.

[Natalie68]

16 hours ago, awaken said:

I’m very surprised that he has on a “ladies I have arrived “ bib!  Quite forward!

and, of course Deena is posing with her hands on top and bottom of her bump. 

I tried to watch the vid but since I am a banished follower I didn't get to see it (WAH!).  Sounds like they are getting a jump on advertising Sam.  Ha!  It would be funny if he weren't going to be courting in about 18 years.

[ginger90]

From what I recall, waiting until a child is 1 year old for adding spices, curry, chili pepper, and such, is advised.

[doodlebug]

22 minutes ago, floridamom said:

Why would Jill feed Sammy Indian food? I understand it is very spicy hot. I don't think that's a good idea at his age.

It doesn't have to be spicy hot.  It could be she cooked up a batch with minimal spices just for him.  Or, being the idiot we know she is, she didn't know that infants really shouldn't eat spicy stuff.  Probably the latter.  God forbid, she should ask a pediatrician or pediatric nurse practitioner or check an infant care book on the subject.