Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[Minivanessa]

18 minutes ago, Natalie68 said:

Wait, what???  

Jill and Derick had been unpleasantly surprised to discover certain financial moves that had been made by JB, unknown to her,  with respect to her finances - see my post above about his CPA having filed several years' tax returns showing that Jill had been paid money, when in fact the money hadn't been paid to her at all.

Also Jill and Derick had been unable to obtain copies of the contract documents that allegedly obligated her/them to the TLC show. They finally hired a lawyer to get those documents from JB, who "went ballistic" - Jill's words. He fought back with texts and emails and enlisted her siblings to push back at her. JB really dug in. It was like war. And it was tough. Jill said the lawyer took it in stride and Derick reassured her that they (Jill and Derick) were doing nothing wrong, but it was very hard on her.

Finally, just after midnight on a snowy night, they heard a noise outside their house. It was kind of scary and they looked out and saw Michelle walking back to her car. They were puzzled but then they got a text from Michelle, telling them she'd left the 2014 contract between their storm door and front door. Yep. There it was. That was the main document they had been fighting JB - and getting huge pushback - to get. 

Strange stuff indeed.

 

Edited September 14, 2023 by Jeeves

[Natalie68]

5 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

Jill and Derick had been unpleasantly surprised to discover certain financial moves that had been made by JB, unknown to her,  with respect to her finances - see my post above about his CPA having filed several years' tax returns showing that Jill had been paid money, when in fact the money hadn't been paid to her at all.

Also Jill and Derick had been unable to obtain copies of the contract documents that allegedly obligated her/them to the TLC show. They finally hired a lawyer to get those documents from JB, who "went ballistic" - Jill's words. He fought back with texts and emails and enlisted her siblings to push back at her. JB really dug in. It was like war. And it was tough. Jill said the lawyer took it in stride and Derick reassured her that they (Jill and Derick) were doing nothing wrong, but it was very hard on her.

Finally, just after midnight on a snowy night, they heard a noise outside their house. It was kind of scary and they looked out and saw Michelle walking back to her car. They were puzzled but then they got a text from Michelle, telling them she'd left the 2014 contract between their storm door and front door. Yep. There it was. That was the main document they had been fighting JB - and getting huge pushback - to get. 

Strange stuff indeed.

 

Wow!  Thank you!  My book arrives today.  I cannot wait!!

[debbie311]

On 9/11/2023 at 11:06 PM, Snow Fairy said:

Someone said she described the traumatic Sam birth in the book. I am curious what happened.

 

On reddit I read some thing from the book and it really looks like she told a lot 

Her uterus ruptured during labor.  I'm reading the book now.

[lascuba]

1 hour ago, GeeGolly said:

Why did Jill receive a letter from the IRS at that time? Coincidence?

Probably yes. From people I know it seems like the IRS is at least a year behind in these things.  Not anywhere near the same thing in scale, but my tax preparer was off one year with what I owed, and 18 months after filing I got a letter from the IRS saying I owed them $90.

[ozziemom]

Jill and Derick may have gotten a letter from the IRS because a 1099 form or K-1 from LLC may not have been reported on their individual tax return where the IRS expects the income to be. 

[MaryAnneSpier]

Is all of this financial/legal stuff involving Jill's family the reason Derick decided to become a lawyer? 

[Fosca]

I can't remember--she didn't try a VBAC with Freddie, right?  Considering her uterus ruptured when she tried it with Sam.

[Salacious Kitty]

1 minute ago, Fosca said:

I can't remember--she didn't try a VBAC with Freddie, right?  Considering her uterus ruptured when she tried it with Sam.

No, Freddy was a planned C-section, a little early. He ended up coming before the planned date. 

[Fosca]

Good. I'm glad that even Jill wouldn't be that stupid.

[Heathen]

1 hour ago, Fosca said:

Good. I'm glad that even Jill wouldn't be that stupid.

Jill is a hell of a lot smarter than we give her credit for, not to mention stronger and braver. She's probably the smartest of the Duggars. I say "probably" only because it can't be quantified. 

Speaking from experience, it is hard to stand up to one's abusive parents, and even harder to be the black sheep of the family because you stood up. Jill is tough. 

[Meow Mix]

Ok, after reading all of this, I am officially going to the dark side and getting the Kindle version of Jill's book.  Reading the excerpts posted here, I am really amazed at how strong she has been.  It must have been difficult to stand up to the bullying producers of the show regarding the trip to Nepal and not filming her honeymoon.  She had always gone along with everything her family and the producers wanted to that point.

I really want to read all of this for myself because she gives an interesting peek behind the curtain of reality TV and the subsequent events we saw like the Megyn Kelley interview.  She has exercised some poor judgement (trying to have a VBAC with Sam with no prenatal care comes to mind), but it does sound like she and Derick are a team in this.  I was most concerned that this was Derick telling a story of a petty feud over money and using Jill to do it, but given JB's abhorrent behavior, there is so much more to it.  If my in-law sent my spouse an itemized bill for parenting them, I would be ready to have a smack down.

Like others here, I also want to buy the book because it twists the knife just a little further for JB.  Maybe he and Kody Brown can compare knives in the kidneys.

[xwordfanatik]

23 minutes ago, Meow Mix said:

Ok, after reading all of this, I am officially going to the dark side and getting the Kindle version of Jill's book.  Reading the excerpts posted here, I am really amazed at how strong she has been.  It must have been difficult to stand up to the bullying producers of the show regarding the trip to Nepal and not filming her honeymoon.  She had always gone along with everything her family and the producers wanted to that point.

I really want to read all of this for myself because she gives an interesting peek behind the curtain of reality TV and the subsequent events we saw like the Megyn Kelley interview.  She has exercised some poor judgement (trying to have a VBAC with Sam with no prenatal care comes to mind), but it does sound like she and Derick are a team in this.  I was most concerned that this was Derick telling a story of a petty feud over money and using Jill to do it, but given JB's abhorrent behavior, there is so much more to it.  If my in-law sent my spouse an itemized bill for parenting them, I would be ready to have a smack down.

Like others here, I also want to buy the book because it twists the knife just a little further for JB.  Maybe he and Kody Brown can compare knives in the kidneys.

There are lots of five-star reviews on Amazon.  I didn't check on Ginger's reviews.  

I am here for JB getting a comeuppance.  He's in the repulsive asshole club with Kootie (Kody) Brown.  

 

[Tigregirl]

I just finished the book.  JB is a bigger ahole than I ever thought he could be.  I never really watched the show much, and when I did, I thought he came across as an arrogant doofus.  But he is a manipulative POS.  Good for Jill for standing up to him, figuring out who she is and starting to deal with all the fears and guilt she grew up with.  I can’t imagine growing up the way the Duggars did.  I hope she continues to heal, grow and find peace and strength.

[CalicoKitty]

Just finished the book.  It was an interesting read.  Jill shows real emotional growth, as does Derick, and therapy really did help both of them.  JB truly is a jerk, and I really do wonder if there will be any investigation of his finances after more people read this book.  Jill spoke about how Josh sat on a couch just out of camera range looking very unconcerned during the Kelly interview.  I doubt Jill will ever have anything to do with Josh in future.  The writer they hired did do a good job.  It is well written and easy to read with proper grammar and spelling, which sometimes does not happen with "celebrity" books.  I found it well worth reading.

[Salacious Kitty]

Jill has grown more in the last 6-7 years than any of her adult siblings will grow in their lifetimes. I found the book to be very honest and raw at points. 

[Salacious Kitty]

Jill's interview on Nightline.

 

[sagittarius sue]

7 hours ago, MaryAnneSpier said:

Is all of this financial/legal stuff involving Jill's family the reason Derick decided to become a lawyer? 

To quote The Who, Won't Get Fooled Again.

[GeeGolly]

I have to say, with what has been posted/written about the book Jill shows remarkable strength. It sucks she couldn't have had a slow growth without this money feud. She clearly loves her parents and siblings and JB&M had the power to make this turn out differently.

I have a sneaking suspicion something similar played out between the Vuolos and JB&M but with slightly less drama and more privately. JB likely felt Derick was a less formidable opponent than Jeremy and pushed back more with him.

Has Jill written about how this has impacted her faith? Or how faith impacted her childhood and family dynamics?

There are only so many parts an elephant has. The siblings have seen the part that is Josh, the part that is money, the part that is privacy/fame and little peeks of the part that is religion, and of course the parts that are JB&M. I wonder if they are allowing themselves to see the whole elephant or are stuck and seeing only the part(s) they've been told to see.

I truly hope Jill's next "season" of life is a calm time of healing, contentment and peace.

Edited September 15, 2023 by GeeGolly

[SunnyBeBe]

Back in one of the old episodes of Counting On, was there one about Derrick getting jaw or dental surgery?  I’m trying to recall the details.  

[Minivanessa]

2 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Back in one of the old episodes of Counting On, was there one about Derrick getting jaw or dental surgery?  I’m trying to recall the details.  

Yes. He had surgery, I think it was supposed to fix a jaw alignment problem. I didn't follow all the deets but it seemed he had a painful recovery, and I'm not sure it did the job. It's not mentioned at all in the book.

[GeeGolly]

If there was a Coogan Trust type law for reality show kids each Duggar kid would have something around $57,000 (not accounting for interest). I wonder if JB&M used a similar calculation for the $80,000 payouts for the other kidults.

$8 million divided by 21 equals around $380,000. 15% of $380,000 is $57,000.

I'm glad Jill got more. I only wish, for Jill's sake, it wouldn't have taken a feud to get it.

 

Edited September 15, 2023 by GeeGolly

[GeeGolly]

Coming back to add, Jill's siblings should be thanking her for their $80,000 payouts. How shitty of them to take that money and still side with JB.

[Minivanessa]

42 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

If there was a Coogan Trust type law for reality show kids each Duggar kid would have something around $57,000 (not counting for interest). I wonder if JB&M used a similar calculation for the $80,000 payouts for the other kidults.

$8 million divided by 21 equals around $380,000. 15% of $380,000 is $57,000.

I'm glad Jill got more. I only wish, for Jill's sake, it wouldn't have taken a feud to get it.

JB has been managing all that money. He invested it in real estate and other businesses, and seems to have done pretty well with it. I wonder if his idea of a payout to each kid is that they would get whatever original amount was their share of the TLC show income, with maybe a little interest. Instead of their proportionate share of what those investments are worth now. IOW, JB keeping the profits. 

[GeeGolly]

10 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

JB has been managing all that money. He invested it in real estate and other businesses, and seems to have done pretty well with it. I wonder if his idea of a payout to each kid is that they would get whatever original amount was their share of the TLC show income, with maybe a little interest. Instead of their proportionate share of what those investments are worth now. IOW, JB keeping the profits. 

Oh, I'm sure. He wasn't even going to pay them at all. And JB being JB would think his investments were the result of his *brilliance alone, so the money is his alone.

*I by no means think JB is brilliant. I assume JB is the only one who thinks that.

[AstridM]

47 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Coming back to add, Jill's siblings should be thanking her for their $80,000 payouts. How shitty of them to take that money and still side with JB.

And they should be thanking her even more for being the one who was courageous and honest enough to tell JB & M about Josh when they were kids.  Instead, she was repeatedly teased and ostracized for “tattling.” 🥲

[lascuba]

5 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

 

There are only so many parts an elephant has. The siblings have seen the part that is Josh, the part that is money, the part that is privacy/fame and little peeks of the part that is religion, and of course the parts that are JB&M. I wonder if they are allowing themselves to see the whole elephant or are stuck and seeing only the part(s) they've been told to see.

.

I've yet to see any mention that Jill and Derick acknowledge any of their own wrong doings in the past, so I'm guessing they're only seeing the parts that don't make them uncomfortable.

[Guest]

I am doing the audiobook so I'm a bit slow at times. But I just got to the point where they found out that her contract was up and they could have done the ministry work they wanted to, but they couldn't get the documentation in time.  I felt really bad for them at that point. :(

[lascuba]

Just came across this line passage on reddit:

Quote

Derick had been making comment son Twitter, speaking his mind about various topics and making a few enemies.

Biases confirmed! 😂

 

[Zella]

29 minutes ago, lascuba said:

Just came across this line passage on reddit:

Biases confirmed! 😂

 

That's certainly one way to phrase Derick's Twitter presence at that time. LOL 

[EarlGreyTea]

One of the things that surprised me most was Jill actually wanting to do even more mission work. It always seemed on the surface that she was more of a passive player in it, even though she said she had a heart for missions. Reading about the danger they faced and their friend who was murdered, it's no wonder she was terrified. I assumed she wanted to get out of dodge and that Derick was the one who wanted to stay.

I liked reading about her bonding with the women she met in her mission work, and when she said she missed them. I remember being touched by a scene in Counting On where she made banana bread for a small group of ladies and, even though she didn't understand much Spanish, still looked engaged and sympathetic.

[zoomama]

i finished the book last night -- i bought the hardback copy. they can have my pennies. i found it compelling and enlightening reading. it was interesting in that as i read, i remembered questions we had about D/J at times and it answered the questions for me. it left me shook that a parent could be so heartless to their own child in such an underhanded way - brainwashing and controlling. now, i know it goes on, but to read it from the inside perspective of what we had seen on tv and in the news was really disturbing. also, my impression of michelle has changed a bit -- not a lot -- but a bit. how much of her demeanor and actions has been him manipulating her all along? i guess we will never know that answer. someone upthread asked about her faith at this time. she is very strong in her faith, but not in the IBLP version. i am impressed with how strong she has turned out to be and frankly, derick too. he may be a PITA online but he seemingly stood by her and supported her valiantly through the years of crazy. i am impressed with these two ex-duggars.

[ChicksDigScars]

20 hours ago, JAYJAY1979 said:

The fact Jill actually used the P word when talking about Josh during one of the interviews surprised me in a good way.  She realized her dad cared more about the child that did the crime as opposed to the children that were attacked.

And hearing Josh was in the same room/area as Jessa and Jill is the missing piece.  Jessa was so shut down/angry during the interview while Jill was so sad and scared.  Now it makes sense.

The fact that Skeevy McPerv was in the room during the FOX interview doesn't shock me in that this is exactly up JimBlob's alley. What DOES surprise me is Megyn Kelly and FOX allowing it. As if I needed a reason to dislike her (and FOX) even more. WTF, Megyn? This is your blockbuster interview. You couldn't put your foot down on that one thing?  Did JB state that Josh HAD to be in the room, or the whole interview was a no go? Disgusting.

[AstridM]

4 minutes ago, ChicksDigScars said:

The fact that Skeevy McPerv was in the room during the FOX interview doesn't shock me in that this is exactly up JimBlob's alley. What DOES surprise me is Megyn Kelly and FOX allowing it. As if I needed a reason to dislike her (and FOX) even more. WTF, Megyn? This is your blockbuster interview. You couldn't put your foot down on that one thing?  Did JB state that Josh HAD to be in the room, or the whole interview was a no go? Disgusting.

Megyn was trash then and still is today. 

[Guest]

19 minutes ago, ChicksDigScars said:

The fact that Skeevy McPerv was in the room during the FOX interview doesn't shock me in that this is exactly up JimBlob's alley. What DOES surprise me is Megyn Kelly and FOX allowing it. As if I needed a reason to dislike her (and FOX) even more. WTF, Megyn? This is your blockbuster interview. You couldn't put your foot down on that one thing?  Did JB state that Josh HAD to be in the room, or the whole interview was a no go? Disgusting.

I think the decision to have Josh in the room wasn't a malicious one; I think it just underscored one of the main points that makes the whole thing so terrible. The children (even as adults) were not seen as people to be protected. They were seen first as commodities to enrich the show.  The show took precedence over everything else.

[lascuba]

43 minutes ago, EarlGreyTea said:

One of the things that surprised me most was Jill actually wanting to do even more mission work.

Ugh, of course she did. I know people don't care about that but I've always thought the missionary thing is the worst thing about her. This really proves to me that she hasn't changed much at all.

[LilJen]

4 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Coming back to add, Jill's siblings should be thanking her for their $80,000 payouts. How shitty of them to take that money and still side with JB.

I am guessing that they are still deep in the brainwashing of “this is our ministry to bring the gospel to the world” and seeing JB’s payout as “WOW OUR DAD IS SOOOOO GENEROUS HE DIDN’T HAVE TO DO THAT BUT HE IS KIND AND GRACIOUS JUST LIKE GOD, GEE WHIZ!” I am also guessing that they know nothing of how those payments came about, only the BS they tell them about their “awful, rebellious” sister.

Edited September 15, 2023 by LilJen

[Salacious Kitty]

2 minutes ago, LilJen said:

I am guessing that they are still deep in the brainwashing of “this is our ministry to bring the gospel to the world” and seeing JB’s payout as “WOW OUR DAD IS SOOOOO GENEROUS HE DIDN’T HAVE TO DO THAT BUT HE IS KIND AND GRACIOUS JUST LIKE GOD, GEE WHIZ!”

They were also bound by the NDA they signed not to talk to ANYONE about the money (and everything else, of course).

[satrunrose]

4 hours ago, deaja said:

I think the decision to have Josh in the room wasn't a malicious one; I think it just underscored one of the main points that makes the whole thing so terrible. The children (even as adults) were not seen as people to be protected. They were seen first as commodities to enrich the show.  The show took precedence over everything else.

I think it also underscores who the golden child in the family was and how little value anyone else had. The goal of that interview was to downplay what had happened and show two happily married, well-adjusted daughters, who were doing quite well thank-you-very-much until In Touch came along. If Josh hadn't have been right there they might have managed it. Instead, fairly or un, we end up with the impressions of Jill and Jessa that have lasted until the present day; Jessa as the emotionless b- and family apologist and Jill as the fragile one who wasn't supported when she needed it. The narrative of shiny, happy Duggars could have gone on a lot longer if JB wasn't such a completely destructive idiot.

[Future Cat Lady]

The fact that they had the victims go on TV to defend their abuser instead of Josh defending his own actions tells you how much they don't value their daughters.

It's also disgusting how FOX was basically on their side. They should've insisted on interviewing Josh and not the girls and confront the parents about their lies and actions.

[Salacious Kitty]

We have JB and Chad Gallagher to blame there. I didn't realize how enmeshed Chad was with JB before reading the book. I just figured he was strictly PR. 

[CalicoKitty]

18 hours ago, sagittarius sue said:

To quote The Who, Won't Get Fooled Again.

And to be able to help children and adults who get in the same situation.  Financial and contractual protection.

[Quilt Fairy]

Finished the audiobook and thought it was quite good.  I wish they had gotten a professional narrator, but Jill is not terrible.

[BetyBee]

8 hours ago, Quilt Fairy said:

Finished the audiobook and thought it was quite good.  I wish they had gotten a professional narrator, but Jill is not terrible.

I considered getting the audiobook, but I went with the kindle version. I'm glad to hear Jill was not terrible. I'm not a huge fan of audio versions, but I'd like to give audio another chance one of these days. I tend to doze off when listening to an audiobook! 

[Dianaofthehunt]

Maybe a published author or two can answer this question:
When a book is purchased via Kindle, how much (what percentage) of that money goes directly to the author? Does the author get a bigger cut if their book is purchased in a hardbound edition?

[skatelady]

There are 40 holds on this book in my local library system (over a dozen libraries), and they don't even have the book yet. So I think I will buy my own copy. However.... I cannot keep it, as we are moving and my husband & I mutually agreed on NO MORE BOOKS!! (lol, I donated over 1000 already). Would any of my fellow snarkers like to have my copy after I'm done? I'd happily mail it to you (or deliver it in person if you're not too far). 

Message me!

[AstridM]

I just found a digital copy of the book available for only $3.20. I bought it and it was easy to click and instantly download the PDF copy. 
 

https://www.inspireuplift.com/Counting-The-Cost-By-Jill-Duggar-Author-/iu/3611063

3 hours ago, BetyBee said:

I considered getting the audiobook, but I went with the kindle version. I'm glad to hear Jill was not terrible. I'm not a huge fan of audio versions, but I'd like to give audio another chance one of these days. I tend to doze off when listening to an audiobook! 

I hope Jill’s siblings get the audiobook so they can hear it in her voice. 

Edited September 16, 2023 by AstridM

[louannems]

For those of you who have read the book, I have a question about JB’s itemized list of Jill’s expenses.  Is he talking about all expenses since Jill was born, or just her adult years while she remained living at home between age 18 til marriage? 

I do believe JB spent plenty of money on his adult kids, even the married ones. They all drove big SUVS, had Apple laptops and phones, spent lots of time in coffee shops and nail salon, went on plenty of ski trips and cross-country visits, had too many babies, with little or no jobs or education.

Of course, he bought them all these things because he has to control them and they cannot work (if female) or must work for JB (if male).

[Trillium]

35 minutes ago, louannems said:

For those of you who have read the book, I have a question about JB’s itemized list of Jill’s expenses.  Is he talking about all expenses since Jill was born, or just her adult years while she remained living at home between age 18 til marriage? 

I do believe JB spent plenty of money on his adult kids, even the married ones. They all drove big SUVS, had Apple laptops and phones, spent lots of time in coffee shops and nail salon, went on plenty of ski trips and cross-country visits, had too many babies, with little or no jobs or education.

Of course, he bought them all these things because he has to control them and they cannot work (if female) or must work for JB (if male).

So the length of time he charges her for things varies a lot. None of it was her entire childhood but he charged her for feeding her for $3 a day 12 years, which does seem like some of it was when she was a kid, she moved out at 24 when she got married. It was very much him just pulling numbers out of his ass. 
 

Like a lot of us long suspected, he had all the money and definitely used it to guilt and pressure the kids to do what he wanted. He basically told her her inheritance was 1/19 but would be drastically reduced if she didn’t get in line.

Edited September 16, 2023 by Trillium

[Zella]

5 minutes ago, Trillium said:

It was very much him just pulling numbers out of his ass. 

I've not read the book, but that was my impression. I mean, maybe he did, but I really don't think he kept a running tally of all of this stuff over the years. But he totally whipped it out as a manipulation and intimidation tactic to make them stand down. I can just see the spiteful little hamster wheel turning in his head when he decides to do this in retaliation. I am sure he thought he was being really slick and clever. 

Edited September 16, 2023 by Zella

[Salacious Kitty]

I'm wondering how he presented this to his CPA. That person didn't question it? I'm thinking he (sure they're male) is as sleazy as JB.