Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

[xwordfanatik]

1 hour ago, Zella said:

7 pm sounds like a pretty normal bedtime for a kid Izzy's age. My own bedtime around that age was 7. I've always been a night owl, so I still would lay awake for hours, unable to sleep. LOL But I never got the impression that was an abnormal time to be sent to bed for a small child. If anything, I was probably the little weirdo for being such an insomniac. 

Nah, you weren't weird at all.  My daughter had an early bedtime, and she would read in the dark with a flashlight propped on her shoulder, before drifting off to sleep.  As a teenager, she'd phone her friends and they would chat before sleeping.

Jill and Dillweed need their lotion time, after all!  

[emmawoodhouse]

10 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

How far does Miss Cathy live from them now?  I just can't see Jill dealing with the 2 school boys and a new baby with Deertick away at work 30 mins away the whole day.   I'll bet someone comes to help her.

Cathy is going to be about 45 minutes away, give or take depending exactly where she lives. It won't be as easy as it has been for Jill. She does mention networking, so she is aware she can't do it alone.

[SMama]

Jill’s chances of settling into a daily routine are improved by both boys attending school. If she had all three 24/7 she’d have a laundry room meltdown the first month. 

[GeeGolly]

1 minute ago, SMama said:

Jill’s chances of settling into a daily routine are improved by both boys attending school. If she had all three 24/7 she’d have a laundry room meltdown the first month. 

The boys won't be in school until the baby is about two months old.

[Zella]

35 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Just saw in the comments that Jill said they are looking at churches closer to where they are now. She confirmed that they've left Cross Church (sad to leave it behind, or something like that). 

Hmm interesting! 

17 minutes ago, xwordfanatik said:

Nah, you weren't weird at all.  My daughter had an early bedtime, and she would read in the dark with a flashlight propped on her shoulder, before drifting off to sleep.

Me too! I thought I was so stealthy. I was kind of crushed when I learned as an adult that my dad knew I routinely violated the bedtime rule to read the whole time and that he secretly found it hilarious. 

[Zella]

34 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

I think it's a good parenting decision that the kids have a bed time AT ALL. They wear pajamas, they appear to have a story time before bed. They eat regular meals. All of this is a huge change from the way Jill grew up.

Yes I wonder if Derick going to law school helped impose some sense of routine and order for them and then Izzy going to school further reinforced the need for it.

I assume routines were never an issue for Derick since he'd gone to school, but they do seem to be a frequent sticking point for Duggars and their spouses. I've mentioned this before, but I've never gotten over the shell-shocked reaction of some of the spouses in the marriage retreat episode when they talk about the Duggar lack of a schedule. 

[ginger90]

36 minutes ago, BigBingerBro said:

How far does Miss Cathy live from them now?

58 minutes (41 miles)

[Tuxcat]

29 minutes ago, Zella said:

Yes I wonder if Derick going to law school helped impose some sense of routine and order for them and then Izzy going to school further reinforced the need for it.

I assume routines were never an issue for Derick since he'd gone to school, but they do seem to be a frequent sticking point for Duggars and their spouses. I've mentioned this before, but I've never gotten over the shell-shocked reaction of some of the spouses in the marriage retreat episode when they talk about the Duggar lack of a schedule. 

I don't have a clear memory of this. But I wonder if the first set of little kids did have some sort of routine - back when Michelle was actually taking care of them. It's far easier to establish a good bed time/morning routine when the kids are all about the same age. It becomes much more difficult as the kids get older and more varied. 

My kids went to bed at 7 when they were younger. Then 8, then 9, then 10, then 11. Imagine having teenagers who are wired for late nights with toddlers still in the house. That would be really hard to manage a consistent routine for each one and a certain point I imagine I'd just give up.

[Zella]

4 minutes ago, Tuxcat said:

I don't have a clear memory of this. 

I don't remember exactly what they said, but Abby and Ben both mentioned that the lack of a routine/schedule was something they struggled with and Kendra started nodding. 

The fact that it affected Ben was one of the reasons I started to doubt the family's depiction of Jessa as the organizer. I don't think she's truly organized. I think she was the family enforcer, and in their mind, forcing people to do something is the same as being organized, which is pretty psychologically interesting. 

I do remember vaguely hearing about the family's schedule, but I wonder if it was more of a talking point for TV and books than it was a reality. I am an organizer by nature who likes schedules, and I don't get that vibe from any of these people. 

[GeeGolly]

8 minutes ago, Zella said:

I don't remember exactly what they said, but Abby and Ben both mentioned that the lack of a routine/schedule was something they struggled with and Kendra started nodding. 

The fact that it affected Ben was one of the reasons I started to doubt the family's depiction of Jessa as the organizer. I don't think she's truly organized. I think she was the family enforcer, and in their mind, forcing people to do something is the same as being organized, which is pretty psychologically interesting. 

I do remember vaguely hearing about the family's schedule, but I wonder if it was more of a talking point for TV and books than it was a reality. I am an organizer by nature who likes schedules, and I don't get that vibe from any of these people. 

The Duggars went to bed late and woke up late. For a while anyway, I think they had a fairly routine day, meaning they did things in a certain order, e.g. breakfast, school, lunch, jurisdictions, etc, but that's about it.

Jessa was also the packer in addition to being an enforcer, so I think she got her rep as organized from packing for 21 family members.

[Minivanessa]

2 hours ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Will Derick be home in the evenings? They usually work recent law school grads to the bone those first few years. Maybe working in the DA's office is different?

IMO it's hard to tell. Derick's going to be working in a two-lawyer DA's office, in a county with a fairly small population. It's one of four county offices in the (elected) District Attorney's district. The other lawyer in that office is a senior Supervising ADA (or some title like that). I don't know if Derick's county sees a typically high volume of cases, or what the rhythm of the workday will be like. It might not often keep him working long hours. However, after he's been there awhile, he could be called out on nights or weekends, if some sh*t hits the fan where law enforcement has been told to get a prosecutor out to the scene. Hard to know, as I said, how that office operates.

I do think it will be different from a larger DA's office, as to the possibility he'll get to work on more serious cases, without having to navigate his way up a ladder full of more senior lawyers.  

[crazy8s]

9 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Jessa was also the packer in addition to being an enforcer, so I think she got her rep as organized from packing for 21 family members.

there is a video out there of jessa talking about being the family packer and it is her saying she took over the job because she didn't like what the others packed or how the others packed. It had nothing to do with her being given that as a jurisdiction or her being organized in any way. I actually liked her honesty and self awareness in admitting that was why she was the packing person.

[GeeGolly]

3 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

there is a video out there of jessa talking about being the family packer and it is her saying she took over the job because she didn't like what the others packed or how the others packed. It had nothing to do with her being given that as a jurisdiction or her being organized in any way. I actually liked her honesty and self awareness in admitting that was why she was the packing person.

Right. I didn't think she got the job of packing because she was organized, but I do think she got the reputation of being organized because she did a good job packing for everyone.

[ginger90]

19 hours ago, ginger90 said:

Happy mail on the way?

They have informed the public on Instagram and their site. 🤷🏼‍♀️ 

[lascuba]

55 minutes ago, crazy8s said:

there is a video out there of jessa talking about being the family packer and it is her saying she took over the job because she didn't like what the others packed or how the others packed. It had nothing to do with her being given that as a jurisdiction or her being organized in any way. I actually liked her honesty and self awareness in admitting that was why she was the packing person.

This just reminded me of an episode where some of them were going to be traveling. This was when Jill was courting Derick and she was particularly insufferable. Jill was talking to Jessa about what she packed and told her that she considered any extras Jessa was bringing as part of her potential wardrobe during the trip. Jessa, very matter-of-fact, said she didn't pack any extras, only x number of outfits for x number of days. Jill, extremely snottily, replied, "Well, look at you."

45 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

They have informed the public on Instagram and their site. 🤷🏼‍♀️ 

It's been a while since I've donated to an abortion fund in a Duggar's name. Thanks, Derick!

[louannems]

16 hours ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Cathy is going to be about 45 minutes away, give or take depending exactly where she lives. It won't be as easy as it has been for Jill. She does mention networking, so she is aware she can't do it alone.

16 hours ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Cathy is going to be about 45 minutes away, give or take depending exactly where she lives. It won't be as easy as it has been for Jill. She does mention networking, so she is aware she can't do it alone.

Jill could send for her sister Jenny for a month or so.  I don’t ever remember Jenny talking but she seems like a very calm person who could be a big help.

 I’m sure she could get her workbooks done at Jill’s house.

If, of course, if JB allows it!

[Zella]

21 minutes ago, louannems said:

Jill could send for her sister Jenny for a month or so.  I don’t ever remember Jenny talking but she seems like a very calm person who could be a big help.

 I’m sure she could get her workbooks done at Jill’s house.

If, of course, if JB allows it!

I don't think Jim Bob would sign off on that at all. 

[SnapHappy]

Wow, Jill really went all in on the ratty extensions look.  Dewreck must be into the bleached-out hooker vibe she's giving off.  

Mailing address, event address and media requests : they are always looking for a handout.  

[SMama]

I understand that Jill doesn’t handle newborns well and will probably be overwhelmed until Izzy and Sam go to school. But she and Derick are adults who chose to procreate knowing about her issues. Then they should suck it up and deal with it like the adults they are supposed to be. To ship Jenny or anyone else is just enabling irresponsible procreation. Jill and Derick damn well knew the changes they faced and the timing. Poor planning on their part should not become anyone else’s problem. 

[Scarlett45]

43 minutes ago, SMama said:

I understand that Jill doesn’t handle newborns well and will probably be overwhelmed until Izzy and Sam go to school. But she and Derick are adults who chose to procreate knowing about her issues. Then they should suck it up and deal with it like the adults they are supposed to be. To ship Jenny or anyone else is just enabling irresponsible procreation. Jill and Derick damn well knew the changes they faced and the timing. Poor planning on their part should not become anyone else’s problem. 

I agree with this.

Of course I believe it does take a village, and love, care and support from well meaning extended family can be great (I had such loving relationships with my great aunts and uncles), but Jill and Derick are two healthy, abled bodied adults who chose to have kids.

If people want to come help (out of love for them), that's great, but unless Jill has a serious medical complication at the end of her pregnancy/post partum (which I wouldn't wish on anyone), there's no reason why she and Derick cannot handle a newborn and two school aged children. Derick will get paternity leave for at least a week or two, and Jill is a SAHM.

[Minivanessa]

I agree that Jill can take care of her own kids, per the comments above. But did I miss something? Has Jill recently posted anything on SM or said anything publicly, that shows she's expecting Cathy or one of her sisters to move in and help her after the baby is born? I don't see it above, but I'm not great at keeping up with all the Duggars' comments etc.

[Scarlett45]

1 minute ago, Jeeves said:

I agree that Jill can take care of her own kids, per the comments above. But did I miss something? Has Jill recently posted anything on SM or said anything publicly, that shows she's expecting Cathy or one of her sisters to move in and help her after the baby is born? I don't see it above, but I'm not great at keeping up with all the Duggars' comments etc.

No I don't think Jill stated anything like that. We were discussing here the changes to the Dillards routine recently and the discussion of distance between their household and extended family came up,

[Minivanessa]

2 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

No I don't think Jill stated anything like that. We were discussing here the changes to the Dillards routine recently and the discussion of distance between their household and extended family came up,

Thanks. I'm glad I didn't miss something after all. 

[CalicoKitty]

If I had to guess, I would think that Jill will probably have another C-section and that Cathy will come and help out.  My sincere hope is that Jill does not try another do-it-yourself delivery and have another emergency situation.  I hope she has moved past that.

[Absolom]

Jill did seem to do better with Sam than Israel.  Perhaps being on her own more as Derick went through law school, the counseling, and the two boys reaching the stage where they can both be independent and also of some help may make this third infant easier for her to handle.  

[all fall down]

It's been nearly 5 years since she had Sam. We know she's changed in that time in terms of learning boundries with her family and getting some kind of counseling, and she seems to have matured a bit. Hopefully she won't feel as overwhelmed this time. Also she won't have a toddler like she did when Sam was newborn. Sam and Israel are old enough now to do some things on their own, and also old enough to help a little bit. So I hope she does better with this baby, but time will tell. 

Edited June 7, 2022 by all fall down

[BigBingerBro]

[Ljohnson1987]

I wonder if Baby Dilly 3.0 will be a giant like his brother's.  I hope Jill has an easier delivery this time.  Thank goodness she is finally getting proper prenatal care. 

[SnapHappy]

18 minutes ago, Ljohnson1987 said:

I wonder if Baby Dilly 3.0 will be a giant like his brother's.  I hope Jill has an easier delivery this time.  Thank goodness she is finally getting proper prenatal care. 

Has Jill spoken about her prenatal care? 

Edited June 6, 2022 by SnapHappy

[emmawoodhouse]

14 minutes ago, SnapHappy said:

Has Jill spoken about her prenatal care? 

Not a peep.  But I don't think an AR lay midwife can deliver her VBAC. Sadly, she could slip over the OK border and have that scumbag Venessa Giron deliver her (if OK laws permit). 

Hopefully, she's seeing a real OB and plans to deliver in a hospital.

[Insert Username]

How is he practicing in OK with an AR license? Doesn’t he need to pass the bar there too?

Edited June 6, 2022 by Insert Username
Misspelling

[Absolom]

He could apparently petition to join the OK bar.

[ginger90]

That washing machine looks pretty dirty. 😳

[libgirl2]

8 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

That washing machine looks pretty dirty. 😳

It looks like my old one. When our dryer died we replaced both. I am enamored of them both. 

[auntieminem]

59 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Not a peep.  But I don't think an AR lay midwife can deliver her VBAC. Sadly, she could slip over the OK border and have that scumbag Venessa Giron deliver her (if OK laws permit). 

Hopefully, she's seeing a real OB and plans to deliver in a hospital.

She has talked a few times about seeing her OB. The latest in May for a gestational diabetes test. So hopefully she will be going the hospital/birthing center route this time. All her SILs except Anna had hospital deliveries as well as Jinger and Joy (didn't Jessa also do a hospital delivery with Fern?).   

[Absolom]

16 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

That washing machine looks pretty dirty. 😳

It's sparkling compared to many I've seen.  I think I may be a weirdo who cleans the washer.  My cleaning lady doesn't even see fit to clean it.  

[GeeGolly]

19 minutes ago, ginger90 said:

That washing machine looks pretty dirty. 😳

Even the water looks dirty too.

[Kbo]

17 minutes ago, Absolom said:

It's sparkling compared to many I've seen.  I think I may be a weirdo who cleans the washer.  My cleaning lady doesn't even see fit to clean it.  

If you’re weird so am I. All cleaning appliances need to be cleaned themselves from time to time or they get gross.  Her machine is nasty. 

[emmawoodhouse]

23 minutes ago, auntieminem said:

She has talked a few times about seeing her OB. The latest in May for a gestational diabetes test. So hopefully she will be going the hospital/birthing center route this time. All her SILs except Anna had hospital deliveries as well as Jinger and Joy (didn't Jessa also do a hospital delivery with Fern?).   

I don't think she said she was going to a doctor for the gestational diabetes test. She just said she was going to have it. 

Can birth centers do VBACs? 

[auntieminem]

1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

I don't think she said she was going to a doctor for the gestational diabetes test. She just said she was going to have it. 

Can birth centers do VBACs? 

On FB she said she was going to have the test when she goes to her Dr. apt the next day.   Birth centers can do VBACs but I think some states restrict them to hospitals.

[emmawoodhouse]

4 minutes ago, auntieminem said:

On FB she said she was going to have the test when she goes to her Dr. apt the next day.   Birth centers can do VBACs but I think some states restrict them to hospitals.

Thanks, I am happy to be wrong. As for birth centers, I am not up on what Arkansas allows in terms of VBAC, but with Jill's history, she would be best off in a hospital with experienced nurses and an OB. 

[Tuxcat]

What a strange thing to share. It would never occur to me -- "hmm let me take this picture of my belly overlooking my small dirty washing machine... and then I'll post it for my 2 million followers to see..." To each their own I guess.

[SnapHappy]

Labcorp will do a Gestational Diabetes test, as a walk-in, for $25.

They get boutique "sonograms" too.  

Legit pre-natal care is rarely on the to-do list of anybody in this family.  

[GeeGolly]

1 minute ago, SnapHappy said:

Labcorp will do a Gestational Diabetes test, as a walk-in, for $25.

They get boutique "sonograms" too.  

Legit pre-natal care is rarely on the to-do list of anybody in this family.  

Jinger and the SsIL have all received typical prenatal care from the get-go, minus Anna. Joy did for her 3rd pregnancy and Jessa did see a real midwife for her 4th.

I have no idea if Jill has or where she's planning on delivering.

[Tikichick]

On 6/5/2022 at 6:36 PM, Tuxcat said:

I don't have a clear memory of this. But I wonder if the first set of little kids did have some sort of routine - back when Michelle was actually taking care of them. It's far easier to establish a good bed time/morning routine when the kids are all about the same age. It becomes much more difficult as the kids get older and more varied. 

My kids went to bed at 7 when they were younger. Then 8, then 9, then 10, then 11. Imagine having teenagers who are wired for late nights with toddlers still in the house. That would be really hard to manage a consistent routine for each one and a certain point I imagine I'd just give up.

Don't forget to add the wrinkle where the teenagers and the toddlers are sharing the same bedroom. 

[MamaMax]

3 hours ago, SnapHappy said:

Labcorp will do a Gestational Diabetes test, as a walk-in, for $25.

They get boutique "sonograms" too.  

Legit pre-natal care is rarely on the to-do list of anybody in this family.  

well, jill and derrick did seem quite "shook up" after her last delivery and I doubt ANY practitioner would recommend a non-hospital VBAC after 2 sections.  i also assume they have some sort of insurance now since they seem to be actually living in the word, unlike boob and michelle who live in their little fantasy land. and who are too irresponsible/cheap  to actually provide for the eleventy kids they had.

[merylinkid]

On 6/4/2022 at 10:56 PM, sagittarius sue said:

but I think Liberty Counsel has a limited number of partners and depends on volunteer work from other attornies.  That type of work might come later for Derick.

Not while he's at the prosecutors office.   Not sure about Arkansas but most places do not let state employees volunteer for nonprofits AS lawyers or you know related to their day job.    It's tough to even get them to come to pro bono clinics and advise OUTSIDE their area of law -- like family or something.   

The ADA is a good place for him.   It's steady work without worrying about billable hour requirements and finding clients, regular paycheck, BENEFITS like health insurance and retirement, and not too insane hours.   he's going to be doing the little stuff at first so he should keep pretty regular hours.    I know Jill isn't used to not moving around in a crowd with the whole family, so the regular hours, and the kids in school will REALLY help her adjust.    

[GeeGolly]

Derick may not even stay in this OK state job for very long. So any long term benefits could be negligible. 

[ozziemom]

3 hours ago, Tikichick said:

Don't forget to add the wrinkle where the teenagers and the toddlers are sharing the same bedroom. 

Or in the girls room, the same bed!

[Ljohnson1987]

23 hours ago, SnapHappy said:

Has Jill spoken about her prenatal care? 

She posted on IG that she had a glucose test. I doubt she had one with her midwife.