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Celebrating 1,000 NCIS-franchise episodes

Jill, Derick & the Kids: Moving On!!

Chris Knight

By Chris Knight
in Counting On

CM-CrispMtAir
Message added by CM-CrispMtAir,

Shout out to everyone participating in the conversation about Jill’s miscarriage/stillbirth. You’re navigating a difficult topic with respect and thoughtfulness and your contributions are kind, considerate, constructive and informative. 

Thank you. 💚💚

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Zella

Zella

2 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Nope. I know I couldn't pick him out of a lineup.

That makes me think it's less of a "the family doesn't like him" situation and more of a "he's shy/doesn't want to be photographed/likes his privacy" thing. It wouldn't surprised me if Cathy's kids have mixed feelings about him--of the "you seem okay, but you're not my dad" variety--but that doesn't necessarily translate to actual tension or awkwardness with him. 

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emmawoodhouse

emmawoodhouse

Just now, Zella said:

That makes me think it's less of a "the family doesn't like him" situation and more of a "he's shy/doesn't want to be photographed/likes his privacy" thing. It wouldn't surprised me if Cathy's kids have mixed feelings about him--of the "you seem okay, but you're not my dad" variety--but that doesn't necessarily translate to actual tension or awkwardness with him. 

Totally agree; that's my read on it. I think he just prefers to stay in the shadows. Derelict and Dan were adults when Cathy remarried. Hopefully, they've treated Ronnie well as the man their mother chose to marry. They don't have to recognize him as a stepfather, and I'd bet Ronnie doesn't want that role.

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EmeraldGirl

EmeraldGirl

I’d like to see that dress on a tall woman (or just a normal one). Lose the jacket and modestly panel, add some heels and cute jewelry. I bet it could be pretty attractive.

That date sounds nice for KIDS during the quarantine. A break out of the house and stop for their favorite things. I’d do appetizer, dinner, ice cream, listen to kids music or stories. Talk and have fun. Instead Derrick had to tell Israel not to interrupt. And warm weather would have made a lot more sense too. I did laugh though when Jill told horndog to chill out. 

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floridamom

floridamom

Cathy was discharged from the hospital the morning of the wedding. That awful get up Michelle wore is for a tall woman. The dress consumed her especially with the added modesty panel and jacket. Michelle should wear only petite clothing as she is barely 5 ft tall. Kelly Bates is a taller,, larger woman; that's why the dress looked a bit better on her.. but just a bit better. 

Now I know why the Duggars 'court' and don't 'date'. "Date" means sex to the Dillard/Duggars! This video was awful. It was no more a paid commercial for them. They are salespeople and hock any product that will pay them. It is also geared towards like-minded people. I don't think the kids in the car, eating in the car all over town and including bible passages as being romantic or sexy. These people are strange in the public things they do.

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

I wonder if Derick and Jill factored in Cathy's illness to their wedding planning. The timeline feels pure Gothard. It could have aligned if they thought Cathy might have died, but its insensitive if they knew she'd be okay. 

I remember feeling surprised when Jill gave some selfish answer to Cathy when she was asking her to visit in the second hospital. Like if your MIL is that sick, most would go out of their way to support her, but in this case - not Jill.

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65mickey

65mickey

On 2/6/2021 at 12:19 PM, crazycatlady58 said:

Yes but on Kelly it did not look quite so...unique. I am not saying it look great just better.

I had to find a picture of Kelly in this dress. She wore it to Zack's wedding. The difference is that is was shorter just below her knees. And it looks like she had a small amount of fabric added to the bodice not the high neck thing that Michelle goes for. Also her hair was styled unlike that horrible way that Michelle favors. All in all it wasn't too awful.

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BetyBee

BetyBee

4 hours ago, 65mickey said:

So it looks like she wore the same dress for Erin's and Torri's weddings. Can't say as I blame her. Why keep buying mother of the bride or groom with all of her kids? 

Kelly's dresses are all similar, even with the repeats. I don't like layers and ruffles except on little girls. I've been MOB 3X and it's a tough decision, but someone should have talked both of them into simpler dresses with more conventional lines. 

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Temperance

Temperance

19 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I wonder if Derick and Jill factored in Cathy's illness to their wedding planning. The timeline feels pure Gothard. It could have aligned if they thought Cathy might have died, but its insensitive if they knew she'd be okay. 

I remember feeling surprised when Jill gave some selfish answer to Cathy when she was asking her to visit in the second hospital. Like if your MIL is that sick, most would go out of their way to support her, but in this case - not Jill.

Cathy's cancer was such that was unclear if she would survive.  She was saved by experimental treatment. Some people die even when their cancer treatments are going well. She seemed happy to see Derick married and fine with the timing. It was later revealed that she met Jill during the courtship and seemed to have encouraged the relationship.

At one point Cathy went out of state for treatment and I think that's when Jill wasn't able to see her. 

Cathy and Jill seem to have a good relationship with each other. 

 

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Scarlett45

Scarlett45

On 2/7/2021 at 8:09 PM, mythoughtis said:

What this photo says to me is the same now as it did then, Cathys husband was not welcome even though he was her primary caregiver.  Jim Bob should not have been in this photo since Ronnie wasn’t.  

I didnt see the photo that way. The photo was of the parents. Cathy's husband may be a wonderful husband and caregiver to her, and Derrick may respect him quite a bit, but he didnt raise Derrick at all, and married Cathy when Derrick was grown and out of the house. If they wanted him in a "parent photo" thats very nice, but if they didnt I dont see anything wrong with that. 

My youngest god sister got married in 2017, and my god mother's husband wasn't in the parent photo. (and when his kids got married my god mother was not in the parent photo for those couples either) Yes he was in other photos because he went to the wedding, but not of the couple and their parents.

On 2/7/2021 at 9:41 PM, Zella said:

That makes me think it's less of a "the family doesn't like him" situation and more of a "he's shy/doesn't want to be photographed/likes his privacy" thing. It wouldn't surprised me if Cathy's kids have mixed feelings about him--of the "you seem okay, but you're not my dad" variety--but that doesn't necessarily translate to actual tension or awkwardness with him. 

 

On 2/7/2021 at 9:46 PM, emmawoodhouse said:

Totally agree; that's my read on it. I think he just prefers to stay in the shadows. Derelict and Dan were adults when Cathy remarried. Hopefully, they've treated Ronnie well as the man their mother chose to marry. They don't have to recognize him as a stepfather, and I'd bet Ronnie doesn't want that role.

Thats how I see it as well. He isnt their dad. He is their mother's husband and companion, they may love that their Mom has someone to love/spend time with/care for her, but they werent raised by him and they have never lived with him. They may like him on a friend level, or may just tolerate him for their mom's sake.

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BitterApple

BitterApple

13 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

I didnt see the photo that way. The photo was of the parents. Cathy's husband may be a wonderful husband and caregiver to her, and Derrick may respect him quite a bit, but he didnt raise Derrick at all, and married Cathy when Derrick was grown and out of the house. If they wanted him in a "parent photo" thats very nice, but if they didnt I dont see anything wrong with

I agree. My husband's nephew got engaged his senior year of college. A few months after graduation he found out his fiancee cheated and they had a nasty breakup. To add insult to injury, she was in literally every single one of his graduation photos. My SIL didn't think to take a few family pictures without her, because who figured things would go south? So yeah, on that vein I can understand why Derick would prefer to have just Cathy in the official portraits, especially if he isn't well acquainted with the husband.

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

The discussion about wedding pictures is interesting in regard to parental spouses, especially in relationship to our previous discussions about using the term "step".

I would include the parent's spouses in one or two "family" pics and do some without them. My grandfather got remarried late in life. I barely knew his wife as they were only married maybe a year or two before me. We purchased a corsage for both my grandfather and his wife at my wedding, and they were both announced entering the reception. But they were announced as the Bride's grandfather Dick and his wife Sally.

Sally was in some of our family pictures with my grandfather, but not in all. I'm guessing Cathy's husband was in a few family pictures and those have never been made public. I assume Derick and Dan think of Cathy's husband as her husband and not their dad. But the kids do refer to him as a grandfather. It makes total sense to me.

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Scarlett45

Scarlett45

12 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I agree. My husband's nephew got engaged his senior year of college. A few months after graduation he found out his fiancee cheated and they had a nasty breakup. To add insult to injury, she was in literally every single one of his graduation photos. My SIL didn't think to take a few family pictures without her, because who figured things would go south? So yeah, on that vein I can understand why Derick would prefer to have just Cathy in the official portraits, especially if he isn't well acquainted with the husband.

Even if Cathy and her husband are married 25yrs and die married to each other, he's never going to be Derrick's Dad, he didn't participate in his raising at all. I didn't see it so much as not wanting him in the photos in case he and Cathy divorce, just not thinking to put him in a parent photo because he isn't a parent (and didnt serve in a parent like role) to either the bride or the groom.

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GeeGolly

GeeGolly

Google says:

Cathy was married to Rick Dillard from August 20, 1978 until his death on January 18, 2008 from a heart attack at the age of 50.

Cathy has since remarried and has been married to Ronnie Byrum since July 21, 2011.

Dan graduated high school a year after Mr Dillard died. Cathy and Ron married three years later, the same year Derick graduated from OSU. Another interesting fact, the Dillards had been married 10 years before having Derick.

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Scarlett45

Scarlett45

12 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Google says:

Cathy was married to Rick Dillard from August 20, 1978 until his death on January 18, 2008 from a heart attack at the age of 50.

Cathy has since remarried and has been married to Ronnie Byrum since July 21, 2011.

Dan graduated high school a year after Mr Dillard died. Cathy and Ron married three years later, the same year Derick graduated from OSU. Another interesting fact, the Dillards had been married 10 years before having Derick.

Ah I was right, so 3.5yrs after her first husband died Cathy remarried Ronnie. Derrick was graduating from college and Dan was in college.

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ozziemom

ozziemom

It makes sense that Izzy and Sam refer to Ronnie as Pe-Paw (or something like that) as Cathy frequently baby sits for them at her home. So they see him far more than Dreck or Jill and he is a grandfather to them. They probably know him much better than they know “Pops” since JimBoob doesn’t seem to have anything to do with either Izzy or Sam.

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Growsonwalls

Growsonwalls

I agree -- after a certain age you can't really see anyone being a dad even though your mom might have married the guy. It seems as if Derick and Jill have a good relationship with Ronnie but if he didn't raise you, it's hard to think of the guy as a father. 

As for the official wedding photos any moments where you don't have to share the same spaces as JB and Michelle is a W so good for Ronnie for sneaking that win. 

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floridamom

floridamom

Whether or not Dan and Derick like Mr. Byrum, they both should show the man an amount of respect and gratitude regarding his care of Cathy. It was Mr. Byrum who noticed something about Cathy and urged her to hurry to the doctor asap. This action saved her life and he was there for her and took care of her during her terrible illness. Would Dan or Derick have stopped their lives to care 24/7 for their mother? I'm glad the guy was there for her. This comment is based on what was published about her illness. We really know nothing about Mr. Byrum. I don't think Cathy would have married a man who was not good to her. 

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Jeeves

Jeeves

(edited)
2 hours ago, floridamom said:

Whether or not Dan and Derick like Mr. Byrum, they both should show the man an amount of respect and gratitude regarding his care of Cathy. 

What evidence do we have that they don't? His not being in publicly released wedding photos doesn't equal disrespect or ingratitude IMO. Is there anything other than that?

Edited by Jeeves
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Absolom

Absolom

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3 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Jill needs to scramble now and give Miss Cathy her first granddaughter.

No, Jill needs to stop where she is and have no more.  Cathy had two boys and if her boys have two boys each that's plenty of symmetry and plenty of kids and grandkids. 

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