Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House

[kokapetl]

I know I'm completely projecting on this, but I swear Bin and Jinger are posing like two young kids who like each other but don't want everyone to know. Hmmm.

I see it too.

[JoanArc]

 

There is a lot more than looks to their marriage.  Look at their philosophical and religious outlook.  They are better than the rest of us and Jesus loves them more.

No, it's looks. Would Jessa marry Derick-tier looks?

 

Add me to the 'divorce in 5 years' pile.

[Defrauder]

Sorry if this has been posted, I didn't scroll,

 

From Duggar Family Official:

 

Jessa's favorite Bible verse is Acts 4:13:

"Now when they saw the boldness of Peter and John, and perceived that they were unlearned and ignorant men, they marvelled; and they took knowledge of them, that they had been with Jesus."

 

No one in their sane mind should take knowledge from the Duggars....and yet many do. 

So Jessa wishes people would marvel at her bold ignorance.   LOL.  She obviously reads the comments from  people  about how stupid they think she and Bin are. It bothers her enough to to find a bible verse that says it's OK to be unlearned and ignorant.   Now everyone marvel at her!  Take knowledge of her  she knows Jesus better than you do. I saw them together the other day, walking to Starbucks. she's been with him y;all.  Drinking the java  together. 

[toodles]

Once again the error of our ways is made clear to all us heathens.

I'm sure the irony of this post is completely lost on the ignorant and uneducated (for real) seewalds. Does Jesus swing by their house for a heapin helpin of tator tot casserole and stimulating conversation? Is that how that how the reference reads to them?

To presume you know Jesus so intimately at the beginning of your life is the height of hubris. These two just floor me with their preachy self righteousness. All I can say is karma is a bitch.

[JoanArc]

The Jessa Apple did not fall far from the Ma and Pa tree.

"Hey Jesus, here's million dollar tract. Use it to pay for the fraps!"

[Defrauder]

"Hey Jesus, here's million dollar tract. Use it to pay for the fraps!"

Better yet since we're so close and all how about if you just turn my water into a cup of Starbucks coffee?

[RazzleberryPie]

Well if we're going direct to the source, forget coffee. I'd rusher have Jesus make some wine. Bible says he makes the best stuff.

[JoanArc]

Well if we're going direct to the source, forget coffee. I'd rusher have Jesus make some wine. Bible says he makes the best stuff.

mmmmm...grape juice!

[GeeGolly]

Well if Jessa & Ben think we perceive them to be dumb, rather than posting a Bible verse, why don't they just prove us wrong.

 

Not that they can undo marrying for shallow reasons, risking mom/baby in childbirth, and neither one having a real job with which to support their baby.

 

But there is always tomorrow...

[Barb23]

Actually, it's the Joy-Bin age gap that's about the same as the Bin-Jessa age gap, although Joy's a few months closer in age to Bin than Bin is to Jessa.

 

(per the dates in Wikipedia)

 

Both JInger and Joe are older than Bin, and Joe's the closest Duggar to Bin in age, just a few months older.

Oops, I had my girls mixed up. It was Joy I was thinking about not Jinger. Thanks for the correction.

[Churchhoney]

Well if Jessa & Ben think we perceive them to be dumb, rather than posting a Bible verse, why don't they just prove us wrong.

 

 

They don't have to do anything. Cuz Jesus!

 

Have no idea how that works. But it must work. Cuz Jesus.

[Marigold]

I'm surprised they drink so much coffee. I was a Fundamentalist Baptist and coffee was frowned upon because it can be addictive. I hate coffee so I don't care either way.

[Albanyguy]

I'm surprised that no other Fundies have called them out for drinking Starbucks, considering the company's long-standing corporate support for gay marriage (not to mention the silly brouhaha over their red holiday cups). I know a number of conservative religious groups have called for the faithful to boycott Starbucks.

I'm not surprised at all however that the Duggars would continue to slurp their Starbucks while preaching against gay marriage.

[GeeGolly]

I'm surprised that no other Fundies have called them out for drinking Starbucks, considering the company's long-standing corporate support for gay marriage (not to mention the silly brouhaha over their red holiday cups). I know a number of conservative religious groups have called for the faithful to boycott Starbucks.

I'm not surprised at all however that the Duggars would continue to slurp their Starbucks while preaching against gay marriage.

Are most Fundies that politically aware? I know that it part of their schtick, but they isolate themselves so much. I've wondered how they stay current to the world around them.

[queenanne]

Are most Fundies that politically aware? I know that it part of their schtick, but they isolate themselves so much. I've wondered how they stay current to the world around them.

 

In my experience, absolutely.  It only takes one person, and that person preaches the anti-The Simpsons, or whatever it is, gospel until the time immemorial.

 

They also have no problem frequenting only Internet sites with a right-wing bias, so isolation is not a guarantee of not "staying current".  The question I see is usually, is the information they are getting in any way correct due to its bias.  Exhibit A:  Rush Limbaugh.

Edited January 25, 2016 by queenanne

[Aja]

Well if Jessa & Ben think we perceive them to be dumb, rather than posting a Bible verse, why don't they just prove us wrong.

That's just it. They're so dumb that they think that Bible verse DOES prove us wrong.

[Barb23]

Actually, I think JB had reservations about them marrying. There was more than one time in different episodes where Jessa said something to the effect of, "We're GETTING married, no matter what." I believe Jessa, Ben and Ben's father were the most eager. I agree, their marriage is based mostly on looks, which isn't the sturdiest foundation.

  

You're right. Boob was the one hedging on a wedding. It was Mike Seewald writing blog posts about why couples needed to marry young and not drag things out. I give Bin and Jessa five years before they're divorced.

I do remember Jessa mentioned eloping when Boob said something to her about marriage at Jill's wedding.

I'm trying to figure out how things played out for Jessa & Ben. Boob moved Ben to the TTH so Ben & Jessa could get to know each other better during their courtship. When it seemed like Boob got pressured, he then allowed the engagement but how did this work? Did Boob go to Ben & tell him it was ok to propose? It's like a reversal of the guy asking Dad for his daughter's hand in marriage. In this case, it seemed like Ben was given permission to ask Jessa before Ben asking Boob first for Jessa's hand. I hope this makes sense. Anyone have any ideas?

[RazzleberryPie]

What it looked like to me was 1) Bin thought Jessa was hot and started coming to the TTH for 'fellowship' (the families were familiar with each other from homeschool conferences, etc., but not besties).

2) Bin suggested courting, Jessa the control freak was scared out of her mind, but as 'the pretty one' and the bolder one, JimBob and Michelle took the opportunity for a storyline AND to get Jessa married off before she embarrassed them by dating someone without their initiation. JimBob so had to keep up with the Bates and the people wondering why no one was courting.

3) Jill's courtship and engagement went much quicker than expected, sort of came out of the blue, which should've taken Jessa off the storyline home, EXCEPT Jessa wasn't about to let Jill steal any thunder, even if she was unsure if Bin.

4) Big Papa Seewald resents not controlling the whole situation, and starts blogging about families dangling their daughters in front of (his own) son(s), and needing to marry early to be able to righteously fulfill sexual desires, etc. Basically he told JimBob to hand over the goods (Jessa) ASAP. Bin moves into the TTH to get to know Jessa better.

5) Jessa decides Bin isn't terrifying and is tolerable, plus loves being off the Sister Mom hook because she is Courting. God forbid she hold down a job or do anything besides Court. Plus she gets a lot of attention for her reward from God for being the Perfect Christian Girl. Everyone is totally jealous, of course.

6) Bin and Jessa officially court and get engaged. Bin did speak with JB and Michlle prior to asking Jessa to court and to get engaged. JB gives approval, but seems hesitant. I think he'd backed himself into a hole, and thought that with Jill's wedding, they were off the hook for getting a daugther married, but by now, Jessa will have Bin and her wedding or die. She'd have married Hitler to spite everyone and show who was in control of her life, as best she could.

By now they both think they invented courting, dating, love, relationships, marriage, etc., plus Jessa starts to actually get the hots for Bin. She's sure the world is jealous.

7) Wedding. Jessa invents sex. Too bad none of the rest of the world knows about sex. Jessa gets pregnant, Bin graduates from community college. Jessa speaks at wonens's events, Bin follows her, but doesn't work or go to school, bc they're pregnant. Baby comes. Jill and Michelle almost kill Jessa. Josh. Bin starts YouTube videos but still no real job. TLC saves the day with anothe special. TBC.....

[Defrauder]

What it looked like to me was 1) Bin thought Jessa was hot and started coming to the TTH for 'fellowship' (the families were familiar with each other from homeschool conferences, etc., but not besties).

2) Bin suggested courting, Jessa the control freak was scared out of her mind, but as 'the pretty one' and the bolder one, JimBob and Michelle took the opportunity for a storyline AND to get Jessa married off before she embarrassed them by dating someone without their initiation. JimBob so had to keep up with the Bates and the people wondering why no one was courting.

3) Jill's courtship and engagement went much quicker than expected, sort of came out of the blue, which should've taken Jessa off the storyline home, EXCEPT Jessa wasn't about to let Jill steal any thunder, even if she was unsure if Bin.

4) Big Papa Seewald resents not controlling the whole situation, and starts blogging about families dangling their daughters in front of (his own) son(s), and needing to marry early to be able to righteously fulfill sexual desires, etc. Basically he told JimBob to hand over the goods (Jessa) ASAP. Bin moves into the TTH to get to know Jessa better.

5) Jessa decides Bin isn't terrifying and is tolerable, plus loves being off the Sister Mom hook because she is Courting. God forbid she hold down a job or do anything besides Court. Plus she gets a lot of attention for her reward from God for being the Perfect Christian Girl. Everyone is totally jealous, of course.

6) Bin and Jessa officially court and get engaged. Bin did speak with JB and Michlle prior to asking Jessa to court and to get engaged. JB gives approval, but seems hesitant. I think he'd backed himself into a hole, and thought that with Jill's wedding, they were off the hook for getting a daugther married, but by now, Jessa will have Bin and her wedding or die. She'd have married Hitler to spite everyone and show who was in control of her life, as best she could.

By now they both think they invented courting, dating, love, relationships, marriage, etc., plus Jessa starts to actually get the hots for Bin. She's sure the world is jealous.

7) Wedding. Jessa invents sex. Too bad none of the rest of the world knows about sex. Jessa gets pregnant, Bin graduates from community college. Jessa speaks at wonens's events, Bin follows her, but doesn't work or go to school, bc they're pregnant. Baby comes. Jill and Michelle almost kill Jessa. Josh. Bin starts YouTube videos but still no real job. TLC saves the day with anothe special. TBC.....

I Love You.

[Barb23]

Thanks Razzleberry . I forgot about Jilly Muffin slinking in with her quick courtship & wedding & pushing Jessa aside.

[BitterApple]

Razzleberry drops mic and exits stage left....

A million likes to your post.

[whydoiwatch]

 

Razzleberry drops mic and exits stage left....

A million likes to your post.

AGREE. Razzleberry, that post was the best ever, so succinct. Under your point #7, "baby comes. Jill and Michelle almost kill Jessa", I laughed hysterically. Not really funny, but so true. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

[RazzleberryPie]

You heathens are all welcome for purposing to be encouragers to me in this season of life and the Iraq and we don't have maps and so forth.

If you are so led in your hearts to do so, please forward your minimum love offerings of various gift cards valued at $50 to me. Sephora and restaurants are preferred.

[mbutterfly]

Well if we're going direct to the source, forget coffee. I'd rusher have Jesus make some wine. Bible says he makes the best stuff.

We all do have fun here with our Bible references. That's why we are so happy together here. 

[Pete Martell]

Ben needs to permanently lose that stupid hat - what a dunce.

 

It hides his hair so I think he automatically looks about 10 times better, even if he ends up looking like one of those characters they added to the last years of 227.

Edited January 26, 2016 by Pete Martell

[Guest]

An old love note that Ben wrote for Jessa when they were courting. His penmanship and his prose are that of a 7th grade girl. And of course, he signed his name with a little cross just in case she momentarily forgot that he really, really loves Jesus. 

 

Edited January 28, 2016 by Guest

[Sew Sumi]

"I love YOUR more..." 

 

At any rate, I think I recall saying at the time that this was typical Vision Forum blather. Dougie was all about the romance of women and children first. Pity he turned out to be precisely the opposite! 

[Darknight]

An old love note that Ben wrote for Jessa when they were courting. His penmanship and his prose are that of a 7th grade girl. And of course, he signed his name with a little cross just in case she momentarily forgot that he really, really loves Jesus.

He has good handwriting :D

[louannems]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBDvhHvjfsw/

Spurgeon talks with Jessa

[RazzleberryPie]

*Swoon* so romantic, just like when Fred Flinstone wrote the poem to Wilma and said she had "eyes like frying pans" *swoons again*

 

He sounds like a 10 year old girl writing to Justin Bieber or whomever those crazy kids swoon after these days. It was Kirk Cameron back in my day. Oh how little we knew. 

 

Lots of flowery language, words of affirmation reference.........straight out of the 5 Languages of Love, Christian Lite relationship advice. So if Jessa had a clue, she'd know words of affirmation are BIN'S language of love. At least at that point he was using his language to speak to her, and apparently hers is quite different. Or was then.From The Jewelry Box Incident with Jana, I presume Jessa's language is (forced) gifts?

[Marigold]

I believe Jessa shared this publically, right?

That's kinda private between two people. I think it was in really poor taste to share that with the world. I guess she was bragging but it looks immature and silly to the rest of us.

At least Ben tried.

Actually, now that I think about it, Ben tries with most things...I will give him that. He took Jim Bob's toilet job to be closer to Jessa and impress Jim Bob. He did it and it seems he is still doing it. He tried to romance her with love letters and flowers. He is trying to break out and be some dazzling preacher interviewing Flame and posting all that wacky God stuff he writes. It appears that he stayed right next to Jessa during the labor, trying to be a supportive husband. He tried to design a unique wedding band. He tried to plan a nice marriage proposal (with the help of TLC $) but he did do it. He seems to have graduated from some community collage although we aren't really sure of details. And, last but not least, he tries to look cool and hip. (epic fail with this one)

Maybe Ben has a little spark of something in there? Ok, not much but as I was writing this...at least the kid tried to do a good job. Contrast with the Duggars who seem to be...doing what exactly?

Edited January 28, 2016 by Marigold

[BitterApple]

I've never seen a guy's handwriting that is so loopy and swirly.

[BOOgen3]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBDvhHvjfsw/

Spurgeon talks with Jessa

I must admit that actually warmed my cold dead heart.

[Tunia]

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBDvhHvjfsw/

Spurgeon talks with Jessa

 

I truly hope for both Jessa and Jill that they take the time to enjoy all the wonderful stages of their firstborn sons before popping out additional blessings.  What a shame to miss out on these simple joys b/c they're too busy/occupied/frazzled by having additional babies before their time, such as Anna did.  The one thing I hope they've learned from their mother's example is that you can't revel in these simple pleasures when a hoard of other rugrats are pulling on your skirt hem.  They can still have their large families if they so desire, but they'll have so much more enjoyment if they're well spaced so that each child can be appreciated along the way.

[SometimesBites]

That letter is so embarrassing. Uck. The wildly filigreed capital B is so very, very Ben Seewald: take something absolutely simple (the second letter of the English alphabet) and--because it's about YOU YOU YOU--smother it with meaningless swirls and swoops and doo-dads. Look what I did!! Gosh, I'm important.

 

I love that the two points of earthly geography referenced in this purple haze are Antarctica and Arkansas. An intelligent woman might treasure this...this thing if only for its gushing sincerity, but would hide it at the bottom of a box, deep in the closet. I once had a very big box of love letters saved from corresponding with a few special boyfriends, and not one of them sports this sort of awkward cheesiness, not even from my first love in junior high school. Honestly, I am embarrassed for them both.

[rabidchipmnk]

...Antarctica has ice sheets, not ice caps. /geophysicistnitpick.  Though honestly with the science education he probably got, I'm sort of impressed he didn't call them glaciers or icebergs or something.  I'm not sure how a smile could melt them, but you sure should worry about climate change... oh, wait...

 

Um. Yeah. Someone's 6th grade homeschool curriculum covered similes?  He... has really legible handwriting though?  And made almost no grammar mistakes!

[GeeGolly]

An old love note that Ben wrote for Jessa when they were courting. His penmanship and his prose are that of a 7th grade girl. And of course, he signed his name with a little cross just in case she momentarily forgot that he really, really loves Jesus. 

 

I. Can't. That came from an adult?

[Buggin]

I have secondhand embarrassment for Ben reading that letter. Thanks, Jessa, for the reminder that you married a 7th grader. The stupid sideways hat wasn't convincing enough.

[allonsyalice]

Let's be real, though, I'm jealous of Ben's handwriting. I wish mine was that nice!

I would never post a letter like that to social media. I probably wouldn't take it seriously. It's embarrassing. 

[Churchhoney]

I believe Jessa shared this publically, right?

That's kinda private between two people. I think it was in really poor taste to share that with the world. I guess she was bragging but it looks immature and silly to the rest of us.

At least Ben tried.

Actually, now that I think about it, Ben tries with most things...I will give him that. He took Jim Bob's toilet job to be closer to Jessa and impress Jim Bob. He did it and it seems he is still doing it. He tried to romance her with love letters and flowers. He is trying to break out and be some dazzling preacher interviewing Flame and posting all that wacky God stuff he writes. It appears that he stayed right next to Jessa during the labor, trying to be a supportive husband. He tried to design a unique wedding band. He tried to plan a nice marriage proposal (with the help of TLC $) but he did do it. He seems to have graduated from some community collage although we aren't really sure of details. And, last but not least, he tries to look cool and hip. (epic fail with this one)

Maybe Ben has a little spark of something in there? Ok, not much but as I was writing this...at least the kid tried to do a good job. Contrast with the Duggars who seem to be...doing what exactly?

I agree,and I think a similar analysis applies to the other in-law kids as well. Deficient as Ben, Derick and Anna are, they all seem to me to have shown considerably more spark, brains, effort and warmth than any Duggar has, or at least than any Duggar is allowed to exhibit. I feel sad for all of them having allowed themselves to be suckered in by this living-dead family. Regrets are going to be a major major part of adult life for all three of them, I think.

 

As for the Duggars, I still find the level of braindeadness hard to account for. Can they really all be so lacking in spark by nature? Can JB and M really have been so utterly successful at tamping out any hidden flames in all those kids? And I thought you weren't supposed to hide your light under a bushel?

[RazzleberryPie]

I. Can't. That came from an adult?

Technically? I think he was barely 18 when the courtship started.

[frenchtoast]

Let's be real, though, I'm jealous of Ben's handwriting. I wish mine was that nice!

I would never post a letter like that to social media. I probably wouldn't take it seriously. It's embarrassing. 

I am quite impressed with that handwriting. I might be able to write like that if I took the time. (Who am I kidding? I couldn't) I hope he wasn't teased for having handwriting like that. Because it's good! It's legible, clear, and neatly spaced.

 

The words....uh....I'm wondering if they just aren't exposed to different literature to get an idea that that is a bit...over the top.

[Churchhoney]

That letter is so embarrassing. Uck. The wildly filigreed capital B is so very, very Ben Seewald: take something absolutely simple (the second letter of the English alphabet) and--because it's about YOU YOU YOU--smother it with meaningless swirls and swoops and doo-dads. Look what I did!! Gosh, I'm important.

 

 

I suspect that the handwriting comes largely from the influence of "live the old fashioned way" in these families. The old styles of handwriting were much much more ornate than anything that's been taught in the past 60 or 70 years or so. Before that time ornate hands were common -- more common the farther back you go -- and weren't at all confined to women. Given that these families are longing for an idealized past, I'll bet that mimicking the quite ornate handwriting of the olden days is something some of them do.

 

And when it comes to the content -- Bin's not a Duggar, but he's just about as stunted in growth, so I look at it as what might come out of a sheltered 12- or 13-year-old boy who has been brought up with early 19th-century preachers as his heroes. Bin's really not an adult in development, after his upbringing, I expect, and he was even less so a couple of years ago when he wrote this. And he was also virtually raised in another time, quite long ago really. This kind of flowery sentimentality in language actually was more common in the distant past -- and even more so in the half-fantasy distant past that these families envision and take as their model for life, I think.

 

It's just a different standard of what's socially acceptable. And I have to say that, even atheist tech-loving liberal feminist that I am, I'm not sure our more cool and cynical standard for what kinds of sentiments are the done thing is better. It's just different. Some days I even like it quite a bit less.

Edited January 28, 2016 by Churchhoney

[Joe Jitsu913]

An old love note that Ben wrote for Jessa when they were courting. His penmanship and his prose are that of a 7th grade girl. And of course, he signed his name with a little cross just in case she momentarily forgot that he really, really loves Jesus.

"Fondest words and fair speech"

It sounds like he's trying to write like Shakespeare. Do fundies know who Shakespeare is?

[Catlyn]

Ben's handwriting is neat and readable, but it's all joined up. He worked hard on his penmanship and it wasn't natural to him.  How many who do write in cursive join all the letters up?  It also looks like he doesn't write often. (In this day and age of electronic communication, who does?) So as it being all flowery and such, the boy worked hard on the letter. It's not his natural style, it does look like a letter written by someone who is younger and still learning handwriting.  So, gotta give him some points for trying. It's not to my taste, but I'm not the one he wrote to. Jessa must have liked it if she kept it.

[kokapetl]

Imagine Ben saying what he wrote in that hayfever, mouth breathing, "you got real purty hair" way of his.

His cursive is about as natural as the words themselves.

Edited January 28, 2016 by Kokapetl

[Zahdii]

Considering the level of education the Duggars have received, I wonder if Jessa could even read the letter.  Cursive writing isn't taught in most schools these days, much to my dismay.

Edited January 28, 2016 by Zahdii

[DangerousMinds]

I suspect that the handwriting comes largely from the influence of "live the old fashioned way" in these families. The old styles of handwriting were much much more ornate than anything that's been taught in the past 60 or 70 years or so. Before that time ornate hands were common -- more common the farther back you go -- and weren't at all confined to women. Given that these families are longing for an idealized past, I'll bet that mimicking the quite ornate handwriting of the olden days is something some of them do.

 

And when it comes to the content -- Bin's not a Duggar, but he's just about as stunted in growth, so I look at it as what might come out of a sheltered 12- or 13-year-old boy who has been brought up with early 19th-century preachers as his heroes. Bin's really not an adult in development, after his upbringing, I expect, and he was even less so a couple of years ago when he wrote this. And he was also virtually raised in another time, quite long ago really. This kind of flowery sentimentality in language actually was more common in the distant past -- and even more so in the half-fantasy distant past that these families envision and take as their model for life, I think.

 

It's just a different standard of what's socially acceptable. And I have to say that, even atheist tech-loving liberal feminist that I am, I'm not sure our more cool and cynical standard for what kinds of sentiments are the done thing is better. It's just different. Some days I even like it quite a bit less.

Definitely looks like my grandmother's handwriting. So, hours spent on practicing handwriting and no time spent on so many other subjects.

[Absolom]

Ben was brought up Vision Forum.  This is very much the style they preach and teach. 

[BitterApple]

Technically? I think he was barely 18 when the courtship started.

He was actually 17. The Duggars fudged his age to make it less ridiculously embarrassing that their grown daughter was dating a high school senior.