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Jessa, Ben and Their Brood: Making a (Diaper) Mountain out of a Mold House


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The Duggars post about politics on social media frequently, but these social media posts are not an invitation to discuss politics here in this forum. This rule extends to Duggar adjacent families, friends, associates etc. Such discussions are a violation of the Politics Policy. 

I understand with recent current events there may be a desire to discuss certain social media postings of those in the Duggar realm as they relate to politics- this is not the place for those discussions. If you believe someone has violated forum rules, report them, do not respond or engage.

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I have a friend with a child born on 9/11/01. His friends & family remember the date as his birthday & the day of the attacks too, but the attacks are the secondary portion. Due to his friends age the significance of 9/11 doesn't play out the same. His mom had such roller coaster emotions that day. I tend to separate it in my mind since I know tragic & wonderful things both occured on the actual day.

I imagine the Duggar kids weren't inundated with media coverage of the events. Additionally I feel as though all the kids are younger than their chronogical age & the events would have a different emotional impact on then than they would have on kids of similar ages.

I also have to defend Jessa (Defend? Really? Sigh, yes really.) on posting her date-iversary. From the limited social media I engage in she is doing what it appears 99% of her age range is doing by sharing her every memory & thought with the Internet. Even a lot of friends my age are caught up in excessive sharing. I don't need to know that today is the third anniversary of when your dog came to live with you or that two years ago you took this great picture of your child sleeping & want to reshare it. When did we all become such egocentric over-sharers who believe our every thought has value to announce to the world? /old lady rant

Edited by ramble
  • Love 14
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I hate to stick up for Jessa, but I agree that she probably has no idea of the true significance of 9/11 for many Americans.  My own 20 year old doesn't remember it, even though we had the TV on all day.  My older two understood planes crashed, but didn't quite realize why it happened or what it meant.  They only remember their teachers were distracted and huddled in corners a lot, shooing the kids away so they could talk without alarming the students.  It was only after they got older and the date kept coming up, the documentaries appeared, the adults felt they were old enough to understand (etc), that my own kids are able to put it into context.

 

Jessa?  Probably never heard of it.  JB&M wouldn't bother to tell them unless they were to use the attacks as a cautionary tale to keep their kids from leaving home, or unless Gothard himself was in the Towers when they fell.  And I'm certain that whatever they told their kids was heavily slanted to make sure that their brood only saw the events through the veil of the Gothard Quiverfull cult.

  • Love 4
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I honestly think, in view of Jessa suddenly posting 100 pictures of HER wedding, that Jessa was jealous of the attention 9/11 was given to the country's tragedy instead of HER own first date with Bin!  Imagine turning on the news and seeing the country remembering the 9/11 tragedy instead of reporting - on this day 2 years ago Jessa and Ben had their first date!  Jessa must have been whore-famed heartbroken!  One of the comments online has now named her Jealessa.  

  • Love 7
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Sorry, not a shred of sympathy for a 22 year old married adult who has been able to, and is currently able to access television and the Internet.  She and her husband are not umbilically attached to her parents or Gothard.  She has as much free will as she will take for herself. 

 

Once she left the TTH, the only excuse, reason or justification for her ignorance and stupidity is herself.  Her shallow, venal, vapid, ridiculous, oblivious and selfish self. I feel the same way about her boy toy Ben. 

  • Love 17
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Sorry, not a shred of sympathy for a 22 year old married adult who has been able to, and is currently able to access television and the Internet. She and her husband are not umbilically attached to her parents or Gothard. She has as much free will as she will take for herself.

Once she left the TTH, the only excuse, reason or justification for her ignorance and stupidity is herself. Her shallow, venal, vapid, ridiculous, oblivious and selfish self. I feel the same way about her boy toy Ben.

I honestly think, in view of Jessa suddenly posting 100 pictures of HER wedding, that Jessa was jealous of the attention 9/11 was given to the country's tragedy instead of HER own first date with Bin! Imagine turning on the news and seeing the country remembering the 9/11 tragedy instead of reporting - on this day 2 years ago Jessa and Ben had their first date! Jessa must have been whore-famed heartbroken! One of the comments online has now named her Jealessa.

Jessa is pure distilled America (not necessarily a distillation of the best part or even average part), America cultivated, created and deserves her. Edited by Kokapetl
  • Love 5
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Sorry, not a shred of sympathy for a 22 year old married adult who has been able to, and is currently able to access television and the Internet.  She and her husband are not umbilically attached to her parents or Gothard.  She has as much free will as she will take for herself. 

 

Once she left the TTH, the only excuse, reason or justification for her ignorance and stupidity is herself.  Her shallow, venal, vapid, ridiculous, oblivious and selfish self. I feel the same way about her boy toy Ben. 

I second your post.  No sympathy for Jealessa at all!  She obviously has no sympathy or empathy for anyone but herself.  No excuses for her. None. 

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Jessa is pure distilled America, America created and deserves her.

Not sure if i think this is purely an American thing as i live in Canada and we were all as shaken and heartbroken over 9/11 due to the magnitude of the loss. My Sons

are 25&27 and they most certainly know about the tragedy. But they

are educated intelligent empathetic adults who keep up on current events.

Edited by MarysWetBar
  • Love 9
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Jessa is NOT pure distilled America!  SHE does NOT represent this great country.  Most Americans are NOTHING like her!  More Americans either don't like her or don't know her and they far outnumber any fans she may claim.  Her fans do not represent America either.  This country does not deserve the insults she does.  

  • Love 23
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As far as Jessa posting everything on social media - I know she isn't unique in that regard but I suspect she is sort of the fundie equivalent of a loner guy living in his parents' basement. No friends, except online. They seem to live such an intellectually isolated life. It seems like you can't talk about anything except The Bible and marriage and babies, and that must get boring. She is still just that limited on SM, too, but she is probably bored, restless and, sadly, incurious. If these loons were allowed to have any thoughts and ideas beyond the very few that Gothard approves, and which have already been talked to death constantly in their circles, maybe she would be out in the world and using her energy in other types of social situations, making actual friends. I doubt she even has church-lady friends since their "church" is just her family, right? And you know none of the kids got sufficient attention from that family.

I agree she comes off as immature and unpleasant at times. But if I had been raised as she was, I am sure I would be a nasty, seething ball of anger. Maybe that is her problem. At least she has the brains and perception to snipe at JB once in awhile. Maybe one day she will understand that God gave her a brain and she will start to use it for more important and constructive things. And that Satan won't smite her for it.

Love ye one another, Jessa. Get out into the world and experience the beauty and the wonder. Get out of that hateful, judgmental, nasty, BORING little world you are in. And for God's sake, don't inflict that nonsense on your poor child.

  • Love 5
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Not sure if i think this is purely an American thing as i live in Canada and we were all as shaken and heartbroken over 9/11 due to the magnitude of the loss. My Sons

are 25&27 and they most certainly know about the tragedy. But they

are educated intelligent empathetic adults who keep up on current events.

I agree with your post.  Jessa's age is no excuse for her obnoxious selfishness.  Nor her apparent sheltered upbringing.  She knows when the attention is not on her.

 Well, you condemned Jessa's perceived unacceptable behavior, but then you unambiguously copied it.

Excuse me?  How so?

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I hate to stick up for Jessa, but I agree that she probably has no idea of the true significance of 9/11 for many Americans. My own 20 year old doesn't remember it, even though we had the TV on all day. My older two understood planes crashed, but didn't quite realize why it happened or what it meant. They only remember their teachers were distracted and huddled in corners a lot, shooing the kids away so they could talk without alarming the students. It was only after they got older and the date kept coming up, the documentaries appeared, the adults felt they were old enough to understand (etc), that my own kids are able to put it into context.

Jessa? Probably never heard of it. JB&M wouldn't bother to tell them unless they were to use the attacks as a cautionary tale to keep their kids from leaving home, or unless Gothard himself was in the Towers when they fell. And I'm certain that whatever they told their kids was heavily slanted to make sure that their brood only saw the events through the veil of the Gothard Quiverfull cult.

For someone who has access to internet, there is no way she is not aware if how significant or traumatic this date is for Americans!

She might not retain the horror or numbness, but it's only been 14 yrs. She wasn't an infant or toddler when it happened. It's not like, for ex with myself, not understanding the trauma when Kennedy was shot (being in the womb).

They're not THAT sheltered. They go on trips to NY all the damn time!

But I also don't believe she was thinking when she posted a no one cares post abt her first date. She's just self-centered and thinks her leghumpers only care abt what she's been doing /done. Not realizing that on this date, esp, people have more to reminisce abt than her.

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I think the possibility is strong that Gothardite fundies are taught/infused with such a seething hatred of cities or anything with sophistication, that being concerned with something that happened "in New York City" doesn't impact Jessa.  Not that she "doesn't care" per se, but it doesn't nag at her hindbrain to say that maybe she should do something different on the day-of.

  • Love 1
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I honestly think, in view of Jessa suddenly posting 100 pictures of HER wedding, that Jessa was jealous of the attention 9/11 was given to the country's tragedy instead of HER own first date with Bin!  Imagine turning on the news and seeing the country remembering the 9/11 tragedy instead of reporting - on this day 2 years ago Jessa and Ben had their first date!  Jessa must have been whore-famed heartbroken!  One of the comments online has now named her Jealessa.  

Jessa posted those pictures several days ahead of the anniversary of 9/11.

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Okay lets drop the 9/11 debate and who has no sympathy for others etc. etc. etc. Yes, sadly 9/11 is a emotional terrifying day for many people and yes Jessa posted a picture on her instagram page about having her first date on the anniversary of  one of our most fearful and tragic days in US history. This is the Benessa's thread not a 9/11 debate thread. Please find somewhere else to talk about 9/11 and remember to talk about their first date anniversary and not the 9/11 terrorist attack anniversary. Thank you.

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Am I going to hell that I thought Jessa posting about her first date anniversary on 9/11 was much less narcissistic than the family dumping a hundred wedding photos? The anniversary post made no mention of 9/11 just like billions of other social media updates that day. The wedding dump congratulated Amy and then said "oh BTW here are a load of *Jessa's* wedding. At least she didn't go "9/11 was a tragic day but we will always remember it as our first courtship date 12 years later".

  • Love 7
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As far as Jessa posting everything on social media - I know she isn't unique in that regard but I suspect she is sort of the fundie equivalent of a loner guy living in his parents' basement. No friends, except online. They seem to live such an intellectually isolated life. It seems like you can't talk about anything except The Bible and marriage and babies, and that must get boring. She is still just that limited on SM, too, but she is probably bored, restless and, sadly, incurious. If these loons were allowed to have any thoughts and ideas beyond the very few that Gothard approves, and which have already been talked to death constantly in their circles, maybe she would be out in the world and using her energy in other types of social situations, making actual friends. I doubt she even has church-lady friends since their "church" is just her family, right? And you know none of the kids got sufficient attention from that family.

I agree she comes off as immature and unpleasant at times. But if I had been raised as she was, I am sure I would be a nasty, seething ball of anger. Maybe that is her problem. At least she has the brains and perception to snipe at JB once in awhile. Maybe one day she will understand that God gave her a brain and she will start to use it for more important and constructive things. And that Satan won't smite her for it.

Love ye one another, Jessa. Get out into the world and experience the beauty and the wonder. Get out of that hateful, judgmental, nasty, BORING little world you are in. And for God's sake, don't inflict that nonsense on your poor child.

 

Yes. Yes. A thousand times yes.

  • Love 2
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Sorry, not a shred of sympathy for a 22 year old married adult who has been able to, and is currently able to access television and the Internet.  She and her husband are not umbilically attached to her parents or Gothard.  She has as much free will as she will take for herself. 

 

Once she left the TTH, the only excuse, reason or justification for her ignorance and stupidity is herself.  Her shallow, venal, vapid, ridiculous, oblivious and selfish self. I feel the same way about her boy toy Ben. 

 

Yeah, I definitely get this, and I'm sure most people feel this way, and justifiably so.

 

But speaking as somebody who was brainwashed in much the same was as Jessa has been, I'll attest to brainwashing lasting a very very long time, in at least some cases. When I was in the first decade or so away from my tribe, my ignorance and warpedness largely continued and I got little sympathy for them either. Furthermore, most people I knew disbelieved about 90 percent of what I told them about my upbringing, I think, and I understand why they did because when you hear something absolutely nuts and miles out of the norm you figure it probably isn't true.

 

And, unlike Jessa, I had really really left and was trying to turn aside from all that. I had left deliberately, lived several states away, saw and spoke to family members only very seldom, and very much wanted to be something different from what I'd been raised to be. And it still took me well over a decade to drop the most egregious of my mental habits.

 

Jessa's still totally a Duggar, and will remain so until and unless she does something like I did and then spends years trying to become herself. I don't know what to say about sympathy because while I have no sympathy for JB and M, I also know it's very very hard for kids to leave and change to the degree she'd have to to make us all happy. At this point, I think she's still the robot JB and M raised her to be. And whether that represents the "real" Jessa who'd emerge if she were on her own, who knows?

 

I know it's supposed to be disrespectful and simultaneously overgenerous to imply that these adult kids aren't acting entirely out of their own free will. But I wasn't at Jessa's age. And by then I hadn't lived with my family for four years. Although Jessa isn't a child, she unfortunately also is a child, in my opinion. And who knows whether she'll ever grow up? Because growing up would mean becoming conscious of a lot of things she's been raised to be unconscious of and is probably more comfortable being unconscious of. For that reason, I just can't take anything she says seriously. To me, it's just a robot talking. Thinking about a 22-year-old flesh-and-blood, pregnant talking robot spewing Duggar crap just makes me sad.

  • Love 16
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I lost a loved one on 9/11. It is a date we hope nobody ever forgets. But I am not offended by happy tweets and FB posts. Many good things have happened on that date and will continue to happen. First dates, births, new jobs, etc. IMHO, Days of honor, respect, and remembrance don't have to be mutually exclusive of joyous occasions and happiness.

Gee- Golly I am so sorry for your loss and like you I hope no-one every forgets.

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Or maybe he was looking so hard at the extra thousands a second daughter's-wedding special would bring in -- and a potential boost in ratings to follow the newlyweds -- that nothing else even rose to the level of consideration in his tiny, money-and-fame-obsessed pinhead?

 

He's a shallow shallow man. And selfish and stupid. Wouldn't surprise me at all if the scent of a few extra tens of thousands was many times more important to him than the personal future of his daughter and her children.

I still believe that Jim Boob threw his daughter under the bus to benefit the rest of the family. After all, sky-high ratings and more money worked for him. I think he detests Jessa. And he would do whatever he had to to make sure her life wasn't going to go well. If she suffered to benefit the rest of the family, it really didn't matter to Jim Boob.

 

Bin isn't charismatic. He's not going to make it as a megachurch pastor and Jessa would not be a popular and well-liked pastor's wife. He didn't get enough of an education (or training in a field like plumbing or tech support, for instance) to be able to support Jessa and their children. One has to wonder if it's even crossed Bin's mind yet that he and his wife are in over their heads.

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At the risk of being cynical, who in this picture looks like Jill and who looks like Jessa? And yes, I do think Jim Bob is every bit that emotionally primitive.

 

tumblr_m82qr9AUxp1r8mb1io1_500.jpg

Edited by Julia
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Mary and J.L. are a good looking couple.  Too bad none of the kids got their looks. 

 

That little girl looks like Jana.  I don't think it's Jill.  She's not posing with the "surprised eyebrows" so it's hard to tell. 

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I still believe that Jim Boob threw his daughter under the bus to benefit the rest of the family. After all, sky-high ratings and more money worked for him. I think he detests Jessa. And he would do whatever he had to to make sure her life wasn't going to go well. If she suffered to benefit the rest of the family, it really didn't matter to Jim Boob.

 

Bin isn't charismatic. He's not going to make it as a megachurch pastor and Jessa would not be a popular and well-liked pastor's wife. He didn't get enough of an education (or training in a field like plumbing or tech support, for instance) to be able to support Jessa and their children. One has to wonder if it's even crossed Bin's mind yet that he and his wife are in over their heads.

 

No, of course it hasn't. Ben is still way too young, confident, naive & inexperienced with the ways of the world. [begin sarcasm font] - "Everything - and more - is going to happen exactly as I have it planned, guys. Isn't our first baby on the way, right on schedule? Relax, it's all good...."

Edited by Wellfleet
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At the risk of being cynical, who in this picture looks like Jill and who looks like Jessa? And yes, I do think Jim Bob is every bit that emotionally primitive.

tumblr_m82qr9AUxp1r8mb1io1_500.jpg

All of grandma's old photos have her with some sort of bouffant hairdo.
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No, of course it hasn't. Ben is still way too young, confident, naive & inexperienced with the ways of the world. [begin sarcasm font] - "Everything - and more - is going to happen exactly as I have it planned, guys. Isn't our first baby on the way, right on schedule? Relax, it's all good...."

This kid has no idea how fast everything can go to hell in a handbasket. Here's a good example. Does Bin and Jessa Blessa have anything more than catastrophic health insurance, for instance? And I'm astonished that his parents haven't sat him down and told him that life does not always turn out as we planned. That's ALL on them.

 

What's that saying -- "we make our plans, and God laughs"?

I wonder if it's crossed Mike Seewald's mind.

I think Mike Seewald is a bigger famewhore than any member of the Duggar family, and that's a whole lotta' famewhoring.

 

Maybe he thinks he'll parlay this into his own show on CBN or whatever.

Edited by Missy Vixen
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Mary and J.L. are a good looking couple.  Too bad none of the kids got their looks. 

 

That little girl looks like Jana.  I don't think it's Jill.  She's not posing with the "surprised eyebrows" so it's hard to tell.

I just think Jill (and her mother) look like her grandmother and Jessa looks like her grandfather. And my impression is that Jim Bob hated his father.

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Lets end the calling out other posters on here. And a quick reminder: Be Civil or do not post on here. Think before hitting the reply button. Be respectful of your follow poster's opinions even if they may not agree with you. Thank you.

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I think if Ben was actually enrolled in an accredited college or University in Arkansas, somebody would have leaked it.  I think he's just hooked up with some people who know members of Athletes in Action. 

 

I think Ben is coattail-riding as usual.  On the fringes, but not an actual student and definitely not an athlete.  AIA has chapters in a bunch of Arkansas schools, so it wouldn't be hard to find somebody to make him look "legit" for some PR photos. 

 

He's a Duggar now and obviously has no use for higher education.  

Edited by leighdear
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Is Ben a real college student now?

 

Pickles and Hairspray FB has a couple of pictures of him at U of A. She seems to think that he's proselytizing to students, but I'll be darned if he doesn't at least look like a student. Fingers crossed, y'all! 

 

https://www.facebook.com/269181913180625/photos/pb.269181913180625.-2207520000.1442096053./792501120848699/?type=3&theater

 

https://www.facebook.com/269181913180625/photos/pb.269181913180625.-2207520000.1442096282./792501124182032/?type=3&theater

Edited by Guest
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Fingers and toes crossed Ben is taking classes there and not simply hanging out. I think Jessa would have posted about her man taking college courses though. 

 

I googled U of A and had no idea it was so close to where the Duggars live (roughly 20 minutes away). It would have been easy and convenient for the Duggars to send their kids there. They wouldn't have had to stay in dorms and would have had a chance to follow whatever career path they wanted. They have a bazillion cars and enough accountability partners for the older kids to take a course or two per semester. I know that Jim Bob and Michelle would have actually had to educate them enough for the kids to get in and they fear "green haired" people, but wow, did Jim Bob and Michelle fail them. It would be great if Jessa enrolled to show up Jim Bob.

Edited by Cocka doodle dont
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I think if Ben was actually enrolled in an accredited college or University in Arkansas, somebody would have leaked it.  I think he's just hooked up with some people who know members of Athletes in Action. 

 

I think Ben is coattail-riding as usual.  On the fringes, but not an actual student and definitely not an athlete.  AIA has chapters in a bunch of Arkansas schools, so it wouldn't be hard to find somebody to make him look "legit" for some PR photos. 

 

He's a Duggar now and obviously has no use for higher education.  

 

I fear you may be right but I really really hope you're not.

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Maybe Bin should go to Central America and preach with DerJill. Their ministry is about as fake as his.

 

I can see Bin and Jessa thinking that mission work is for the unphotogenic, awkard Christians who don't have the looks or swagger to be the next Joel Osteen (in other words, Jill and Derick). They're much too hot and sexy to waste their lives in an El Salvadorian jungle. Besides, those pesky natives would just get in the way when Jessa takes her duck-lipped selfies. 

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There are 12 Duggars, including Jim Bob & Michelle, that are 18 or older.  Of those 12, including spouses, only Derick even attempted to go to college.  1 in 12 adults.

 

While I don't believe that every single individual should go to college unless they want to, I honestly have never seen any indication that any of them want an actual education.

 

I think they want legitimacy, accolades, certificates, photo ops, talking heads and documents, but no actual knowledge.  Because I think that if any of them actually wanted knowledge, they would have gotten it by now.  

 

Ben reminds me of Joey in the "Friends" episode where he pretended to own a Porsche parked out front.  He had the jacket, sunglasses, gloves, etc.  But the car wasn't his.  Ben sure wears a crapload of Arkansas gear for somebody that won't say if he's actually enrolled or not.  But I think we know the answer to that question. 

Edited by leighdear
  • Love 13
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I honestly think, in view of Jessa suddenly posting 100 pictures of HER wedding, that Jessa was jealous of the attention 9/11 was given to the country's tragedy instead of HER own first date with Bin!  Imagine turning on the news and seeing the country remembering the 9/11 tragedy instead of reporting - on this day 2 years ago Jessa and Ben had their first date!  Jessa must have been whore-famed heartbroken!  One of the comments online has now named her Jealessa.

Also, I thought they didn't "date" but suddenly she's calling it a date?

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There are 12 Duggars, including Jim Bob & Michelle, that are 18 or older. Of those 12, including spouses, only Derick even attempted to go to college. 1 in 12 adults.

Ben has an associates degree from an accredited community college. Joseph is at Crown/Clown College, which is probably equivalent to Yale in their Fundie circles.
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Ben has an associates degree from an accredited community college. Joseph is at Crown/Clown College, which is probably equivalent to Yale in their Fundie circles.

My mistake, that makes 1 1/2 degrees amongst 12 adults.   I will give Ben props for completing a 2-year degree.  Paid for by his parents and mostly accomplished before he shackled himself to the Duggar family.  He had a chance, but then Jessa grabbed him by the nads and it's all over for him now.  *LOL*

 

And Joseph at Clown college is just background.  I don't think they are even accredited.  That's pretty much the requirement for me to consider a program actually educational.  Not that my approval mean anything!  :)

Edited by leighdear
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Catch you on the flip side dudemeisters.

 

Coke. All over my keyboard. Your fault.

 

I would bet that Bin is in college right now--it's the easiest path and it doesn't require cleaning toilets.

 

If so, I don't understand why they're not shouting it from the rooftops? They're on a mission to get back into people's good graces. Why not report something positive?

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Pickles and Hairspray FB has a couple of pictures of him at U of A. She seems to think that he's proselytizing to students, but I'll be darned if he doesn't at least look like a student. Fingers crossed, y'all! 

I will be gobsmacked if Ben is enrolled at the U. My guess is that this is all about feeling relevant by rubbing elbows with actual college students. There's an old fundie axiom about how going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than a mouse in the cookie jar is a cookie. Kinda goes for being a college student. No matter how many games you go to, they'll never give you a diploma.

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From the caption, I surmise that Ben is attending UofA.

https://instagram.com/p/7iopprAJsY/

Is Ben a real college student now?

Please let this be true. Please let him end up in at least a couple of classes with liberal, hippy-dippy college professors and let his mind open even just thismuch.

Since we know the Duggar wives don't like to be separated from their hubbies for long, please please let Jessa also be enrolled at UofA. (Yeah, I know good luck with her SODRT education, but she's the one with an actual high school diploma, right?)

Coke. All over my keyboard. Your fault.

 

 

If so, I don't understand why they're not shouting it from the rooftops? They're on a mission to get back into people's good graces. Why not report something positive?

Maybe they want to wait to make sure Ben is academically up to it and he'll graduate....I feel like we didn't know he was really still working on his AA until he graduated. Maybe he and Jessa are worried that if they brag about it too much, some haters will call JimBob out for endorsing secular college education and JimBob would make Ben quit. Who knows with this family....

Edited by MyPeopleAreNordic
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In regards to his AA and his possible enrollment in U of A: I wonder how he pays for his education? Did his parents help him prior to the marriage? Student loans?

One thing I liked about Ben (probably the only thing), was that he was shown studying for his community college classes while on his Honeymoon. It didn't seem faked for the series, like so many other things.

Edited by CofCinci
  • Love 4
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