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Commercials That Annoy, Irritate or Outright Enrage


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I know it's been commented on before, but I just have to vent - dear God, how much I hate the ad with the Wifi equipped SUV and the stupid kids trying to watch a movie! The adult has the kids start the movie in the Wifi-mobile, then they switch to the non-wifi car, so they can't watch the movie. Then the guy asks which car the kids like best. OF COURSE they like the Wifi-mobile best!! It's like filling one car with candy and then asking the kids which one they'd rather ride in.

I just hate this commercial!! There's no sense to asking the kids their opinion! They've been manipulated into liking the one SUV! Why would anyone CARE about wifi in their car!! Why... but... It's.... GARRRRGH!

"Flames.... Flames on the side of my face...."

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"Adding to the fuckery, they then each use some outdated "It's so kewl" saying. The car is TheBombDotCom, I tells ya! Who talks like that? Or more rightly, who writes this drivel? They are clearly trying to reach out to a younger audience, but it comes off like Grandpa trying to talk to the kids. "

I keep waiting for one of them to say "it's the bees knees" or "the cat's pajamas." Or "groovy!"
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See that's the problem though. They're half-assing it. They're not entirely satirical enough (except for that sentence), but they're also not 100% playing it for sincerity. It's just weird and confusing. It was discussed before, but maybe that was in the "say what?" thread, but they seem to be trying to have it both ways? Not too biting, in case anyone with leftover affection for the colonel be turned off, but not sincere either, since why the fuck else would you cast Darrel Hammond, plus many many who have qualms about returning to that particular model of a spokesman. I mean, I realize he was an actual person to begin with, but at this point he's a character and a mascot, with a boatload of connotations so it's a sort of bizarre attempt at playing both sides.

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I have to say that the "color is a beautiful thing" has brilliant lyrics compared to "I have swagger, yes I do. I have swagger, how 'bout you?".

 

And the dog on the trip adviser ad sounds like a neighbor's rescue dog, someone cut the dog's vocal cords to shut them up. My dogs bark like there is a monster attacking the house nearly hourly, but I would never clip their vocal cords. I just bark back.

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""....with some TAY-ders.... an' a big ol' COOK-ie"

Kfc

 

I have to tell you, this will NEVER not be funny for me.  I started giggling again just thinking about this! (I know, doesn't take much to entertain me)

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Also Ancestry.com is a total joke if you come from a family of immigrants. I'm of Jewish descent and I know as far back as my great grandparents but that's it. I wish it were easier, but it does irritate me how Ancestry acts like all you have to do is click a few times and voila, your entire family history is revealed to you. That gets a lot trickier when one side of your family's history is "fled from the Nazis" and the other side is "fled from the pogroms."

That's the issue my dad has. There is no "our records were lost in the war here's what we kinda know" search.

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I hate these women & their yellow clothes

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4oKrsvJbjuE

I only sing nonsensically about cats and/or cat-related things, and that's directly to my cats. I certainly don't sing about my vitamin. "It's big enough to choke a hoooorse!" "I forget to order more until I'm oooout!" "I don't know that it's actually doing anything, but my doctor told me to take iiiiiit!" *jazz hands*
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(edited)

really hate those Planet Fitness commercials where they show people working out in gyms where everyone is perfectly fit and looks perfectly made up. They show an average person jumping into this and being totally overwhelmed. Then the person goes to Planet Fitness and they're like "oh, we're not like that, we don't allow lunkheads here."

 

First of all, I am no fitness model and I have been to Zumba classes where seriously, the instructor could have wiped the floor with me. A lot of fitness instructors are intense (that's how they get people pumped) but they're also really encouraging. The gyms that I've belonged to have by and large had people who actually enjoyed working out and were just happy to encourage others to have fun with it too. 

Edited by BabyVegas
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(edited)

I kinda miss the 2 Planet Fitness commercials; the three airheads posing in the mirror "Am I hot?" and the other one, with the leering buff brute pretty much masturbating with his towel in front of some poor shnook .

Edited by Brattinella
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I only sing nonsensically about cats and/or cat-related things, and that's directly to my cats. I certainly don't sing about my vitamin. "It's big enough to choke a hoooorse!" "I forget to order more until I'm oooout!" "I don't know that it's actually doing anything, but my doctor told me to take iiiiiit!" *jazz hands*

So... I'm not the only one who does that? Any time a song is stuck in my head I turn it into a song about my cat and sing it to him. It's not his favorite thing about me.

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We have one cat that will stop what she is doing if I start to sing.  She will rush over to me and examine my lips to see where this strange sound is coming from.  She absolutely loves it.  She prefers ballads. :D

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This was my experience as well so the ads really annoy me. Few things were free even after you paid to join. However, if anyone is interested they (at that time) had a month-by-month membership plan. I joined for one month for $20, got the info I wanted, and didn't renew.

I had mixed results when I used it a long time ago and then discovered some public libraries have it, so why pay for it?

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(edited)

Yeah, that one is a head-scratcher for me too. They don't even mention if she just woke up or something; her head is just wildly mussed with NO explanation.

I think her hair is all messed up because she's a supernerd freak. Dating myself here, but sort of like Ally Sheedy's character in The Breakfast Club.

 

So... I'm not the only one who does that? Any time a song is stuck in my head I turn it into a song about my cat and sing it to him. It's not his favorite thing about me.

Nope, not the only one. Sadly, I find myself even singing the alternative lyrics at work or the grocery store.

Edited by Aquarius
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(edited)

I have to tell you, this will NEVER not be funny for me. I started giggling again just thinking about this! (I know, doesn't take much to entertain me)

Thank you, baby Jesus. I have finally found my people..... my tribe. ;)

And now...

"Chicken in the BUH-kit, chicken in the BEEEEEEEEEANS" ....(baynes hee)

That is all.

Edited by ari333
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I hate Flo..... in all her incarnations.

I do, too.  Where I work, we're practically across the street from one of those Progressive Service Centers, so when a wee kitten got hit by a car there, they brought her over to the Animal Hospital and the techs named her Flo.  Her hind legs have already healed and they've put a cast on the front leg that has a fracture.  She's cute as can be, but, Jeez, I want to change her name.

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I do, too.  Where I work, we're practically across the street from one of those Progressive Service Centers, so when a wee kitten got hit by a car there, they brought her over to the Animal Hospital and the techs named her Flo.  Her hind legs have already healed and they've put a cast on the front leg that has a fracture.  She's cute as can be, but, Jeez, I want to change her name.

Whomever adopts her will more than likely change her name. I haven't kept the names my rescues came with.

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I agree with that.  Stella's first name was Meany and I couldn't understand why someone would name such a sweet kitten "Meany" unless she was the unfortunate second one in a litter of four...Eeny, Meany, Miney & Moe.  The Rescue group changed it to Cinderella.  Bosco was called Cupcake by the little girl that found him on the playground.  The staff at the Animal Hospital kept it. Two days later, I brought him home, naming him Bosco on the way home...even though, the only kitten-sized collar I had was pink with cupcakes on it.  LOL.

 

But, Jeez, "Flo" is just NOT a good name for a kitten.  But I am surprised at the number of people who actually LIKE the Progressive commercials.  By now, I would think just about everyone's grown weary of them.

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So... I'm not the only one who does that? Any time a song is stuck in my head I turn it into a song about my cat and sing it to him. It's not his favorite thing about me.

I sing to my dog, except I change lyrics to her name.  For example, "Jingle Bells" is now "Lilly Bells."  I think I've done it enough that she is immune to how annoying I can be :)

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I swore he was saying "veins," and proceeded to sing it that way while my BF stared at me with a quizzical look.

oh dear god! High-larious! Hee. Now I shall sing it only that way. ;)

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So I'm sitting here relaxing after dinner, and my current least-favorite (i.e., hate-it-with-the-heat-of-a-thousand-suns) commercial comes on, and I think, for the thousandth time, "I have to write about this in the Hated Commercials thread before my head blows up!"  So here goes.  It's a commercial for Xfinity and how its wonderful internet allows you to work efficiently at home even if all twenty home computers are running.  The main character in the commercial is an unspeakably smarmy & smug Dad character, walking through the house in his bathrobe, carrying his mug of coffee, carrying on a monologue about his wonderful Xfinity system, interrupting himself only to snark at his kids to do their homework and to briefly acknowledge an Asian client or colleague who has been waiting patiently for D-bag Dad to keep an appointment for an online meeting; D-Dad barks something at Computer Monitor #14 in the caller's native language, then arrogantly says "Five minutes!" while he keeps pediconferencing with himself.  Eventually he ends up in his garage, home of the World's Stupidest Online Business.  Something about a virtual mouse?  Represented by a cat wearing some kind of goggles?  I hope the guy he blew off was an investor who hangs up and trashes D-Dad on LinkedIn.  Ha!

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I agree with that.  Stella's first name was Meany and I couldn't understand why someone would name such a sweet kitten "Meany" unless she was the unfortunate second one in a litter of four...Eeny, Meany, Miney & Moe.  The Rescue group changed it to Cinderella.  Bosco was called Cupcake by the little girl that found him on the playground.  The staff at the Animal Hospital kept it. Two days later, I brought him home, naming him Bosco on the way home...even though, the only kitten-sized collar I had was pink with cupcakes on it.  LOL.

 

But, Jeez, "Flo" is just NOT a good name for a kitten.  But I am surprised at the number of people who actually LIKE the Progressive commercials.  By now, I would think just about everyone's grown weary of them.

Lucy was originally Linda, for Pete's sake! Who names a cat Linda? Besides, my sister's name is Linda. 

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Lucy was originally Linda, for Pete's sake! Who names a cat Linda? Besides, my sister's name is Linda. 

 

Since "Linda" comes from the Spanish word for "pretty," it can be a perfectly appropriate name for a pretty cat.

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(edited)

In the annoying realm: There's a Time Warner Cable commercial for some service where you can start a movie on one TV and finish it on another (I guess). So this 14ish-looking girl and her new boyfriend are watching in the living room. Mom comes in and say "hi, are you Steven?" a bit enthusiastically. The girl rolls her eyes, grabs boy, who just gives mom a stupid smile, and drags him to the office(??). Dad smiles and basically asks again if he's Steven. Girl looks pissed off again, boy just smiles like an idiot, and they end up in what looks like a young child's room with a 42-inch TV mounted to the wall. Girl finally smiles. 

 

OK. WTF? Boy: When someone speaks to you, open your damn mouth and say "hi," even if your girlfriend is being an idiot. Girl: If you bring some kid into the house that I PAY for, I have every right to ask who the hell it is and expect some conversation. Parents: Why the heck is a big-screen TV mounted on your 6-year-old's bedroom wall? 

 

I usually find this board to be pretty harsh on kids and parents, but this commercial deserves it! Gah!

Edited by tanyak
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Since "Linda" comes from the Spanish word for "pretty," it can be a perfectly appropriate name for a pretty cat.

My two cats have "people" names. I love human names for animals. I think it captures their personalities better than something like Muffy or Bowser. My aunt told me that my cats' names sound Vaudevillian. :)

 

No, I'm not saying what they are; I'm protecting their anonymity.

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I haaaaaaaate the Liberty Mutual commercials. They have driven me to literally yell at my TV. For the one who doesn't understand why paying on time does not cancel out getting into an accident, can someone please explain to her how insurance works? The one with her creepy obsession with "Brad" needs therapy and the guy who can't grasp that a car that will have to be sold as used is worth less than a car that is new...I have no idea how he made it this far in adulthood.

 

Dear Guy in Liberty Mutual Ad,

A couple things:

1) No, your property carrier is NOT on the hook for the value of the loan you took out to "drop $40,000" on a new car.

2) If the minivan truly t-boned you, why are you using your own coverage?

 

Dear EVERYONE in Liberty Mutual Ads:

 

Please Go Away!!

 

Thank you.

 

Some asshole "tapped the bumper" of my car in a parking lot yesterday, and didn’t leave a note.  Among my many thoughts: “Jackass must have Liberty Mutual.”

 

You're not the only one, brickthru the tv. One of us, one of us!

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(edited)

God, such ignoramus people in Buick commercials! First, there's the doofus valet half-assedly looking for the car. "I can't find a Buick!" whines the woman obviously looking for the zonk car given away on Let's Make A Deal. Gah, open your fucking eyes, people!

Edited by pandora spocks
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What I don't get about that stupid Passat commercial is that they are basically saying if you have to stop to get gas, your children become hellbeasts, but if you don't ever have to stop for gas, your children are pod children who never move or speak. It does not make sense. Shut up, VW.

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My two cats have "people" names. I love human names for animals. I think it captures their personalities better than something like Muffy or Bowser. My aunt told me that my cats' names sound Vaudevillian. :)

No, I'm not saying what they are; I'm protecting their anonymity.

My ex-step-mother-in-law (her divorce, not mine) once asked me why I named my cats like strippers. Ha!

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(edited)

I couldn't find it on YouTube, but the latest Sam Adams commercial is irritating.  The female narrator vocal-fries the end of every. single. line.

 

I would rather hang out with the almond than a Sam Adams hipster.

And I thought I was the only one incredibly annoyed with the narrator. I'd never heard the term "vocal fry" before, but it describes her narration perfectly. Incredibly annoying - right on par with up-talking.

Edited by FartManly
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I hate that Sam Adams ad with the fire of a thousand suns. Not only is that vocal fry bitch unbearable to listen to but who wants to buy a beer that may have 8 inch long pube like hairs floating in it from that ZZ Top wannabe sticking his face in the cauldron where it's being brewed? Also, young carefree hipsters may find it appealing to have dogs running around and screwups goofing off and spraying each other with beer whilst supposedly working but I don't. I prefer to have beverages I'm going to consume manufactured in a clean environment by professionals.

Yeah, I know I'm an old biddy. Get off my lawn!

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