The Duggalos: Jinger and the Holy Goalie

[Mya]

3 minutes ago, Mollie said:

His pervert actions started at least by age 14, when he was engaged (not kidding) to a 14-year-old girl.

http://breakfornews.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=7256

http://webcache.googleusercontent.com/search?q=cache:zTcJGJ4Wm8MJ:starmagazine.com/2015/06/03/josh-duggar-was-betrothed-to-marry-before-anna-arkansas-politician-father-covers-up-the-story/+&cd=1&hl=en&ct=clnk&gl=il

Oh my goodness I had no idea.  14?? that is beyond crazy.  Thanks for the links I had not seen any of this before.  Lots of dirty little secrets.

[RedheadZombie]

On ‎3‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 0:45 PM, Lady Edith said:

I think that the ban is a truly healthy thing.  If I were Jeremy my first point of business in the new marriage would be to establish some serious boundaries with his inlaws.  Couples need time to be together. To develop routines and to just BE.  That won't happen with a constant stream of insane inlaws invading their home.  So the ban is a good thing from this standpoint.

in regards to the deprogramming I think this is another possibility.  But it will only stick if there are boundaries put up to prevent Jim Bob from undoing what good Jeremy did.  And those boundaries have to be enforced.  I think Jeremy is the only husband out of the group who is actually able and willing to support himself and his family without the Duggar Dime.  Dreck had potential but his quitting his job and making their escape to DA in response to Joshgate kind of put a stop to that.  

I just hope they stick to their guns here.  There is so much to gain from it!!!

I see what you're saying, but if Babe had a problem with any of this, why did he seek out a Duggar girl to start with?  The lifestyle obviously appealed to him.

On ‎3‎/‎10‎/‎2017 at 3:52 PM, Jeeves said:

Yes. Laredo's in South Texas. It's hot there. The best it gets is - just warm. Well, okay, winter nights are cool. It's not a great climate for anyone who dresses in the good old Duggar frumper "modesty" style with two layers of crappy thrift-store cheap clothes. Looks like Jinge is figuring out a modest way to dress that's also weather-appropriate, age-appropriate, and attractive. 

I remember scenes of Jinger spending so much time styling her hair that she was about to make everyone late for something. Ben was nagging her to hurry up. I think she's more style-conscious than her sisters, and I don't think anyone had to push her very hard into updating her look.

(I started off by writing that Jinger was more style-conscious than Jill - and then realized that my dog is more style-conscious than Jill. I think Jill's just fashion-and-style-impaired and will always look like she dressed out of a ragbag unless someone else picks out her clothes. And I don't think Derick gives a cr*p. Jessa at least tries although those skin-tight maternity tops are dire, and Jana generally looks pretty well-put-together.)

Is there another picture of Jinger out there wearing shorts?  I mean, yes, wearing shorts is a positive step.  But I'd wear frumpy skirts for life before I'd wear her hideous sexless, shapeless shorts!  The look would actually be improved if she bought her walking shorts in a postal worker uniform catalogue.  And she's really not showing anything more than a skirt would.  In fact, a loose flowy skirt and cute sandals would be a lot cooler.  She looks like my grandma who wore this exact look with her knee-high nylons rolled down to the ankle to account for the heat.  I think Babe is trying to give her a little edge.  He clearly spends a lot of time and money on his own wardrobe.  His outfit contrasted with Jinger's is comical.  He looks like he shopped at Abercrombie, had her wear her typical blouse, then got the rest of her outfit at a skater shop.  She's boy from the waist down. 

[GeeGolly]

Many people think that pants are more modest, and in the case of the Duggars more stylish, than many skirts, but the fact that Jinger wore shorts for no obvious reason is a big step.

[DangerousMinds]

Where would Jeremy get the $$$ for expensive clothing on his probably very modest salary?

[RazzleberryPie]

2 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

Many people think that pants are more modest, and in the case of the Duggars more stylish, than many skirts, but the fact that Jinger wore shorts for no obvious reason is a big step.

This. Jinger in shorts, even almost knee length golf shorts is HUGE. Shorts would be even more immodest than pants in Duggarville. This is the equivalent of a regular person going to the grocery store topless and in a thong.

I think Jinger looks comfy, cute, and not at all immodest or vulgar. I probably see less of her shape than I would in one of Jessa's skin tight maxi skirts. You go Jinger. 

[amitville]

13 hours ago, RazzleberryPie said:

This. Jinger in shorts, even almost knee length golf shorts is HUGE. Shorts would be even more immodest than pants in Duggarville. This is the equivalent of a regular person going to the grocery store topless and in a thong.

I think Jinger looks comfy, cute, and not at all immodest or vulgar. I probably see less of her shape than I would in one of Jessa's skin tight maxi skirts. You go Jinger. 

In my humble opinion Jinger has blown her sister away in such  a classy and elegeant way instead of wearing tops 10 sizes to small at 9 months pregeant she wears skimmers and polo shirt looking like a fashion model instead of a fundy hoe 

[RazzleberryPie]

10 minutes ago, amitville said:

In my humble opinion Jinger has blown her sister away in such  a classy and elegeant way instead of wearing tops 10 sizes to small at 9 months pregeant she wears skimmers and polo shirt looking like a fashion model instead of a fundy hoe 

Absolutely. Maybe Jinger, now that she's out of Jessa's shadow, is more like Joe, and can actually THINK. Jinger is still modest and cute, without looking like she is obviously trying to bend the rules as hard as she can, and flaunting her body.

Somehow Jinger still looks really petite, but not frail anymore, either. 

Are they at something semi-athletic? Jinger looks like she's dressed for golf.

[sometimesy]

31 minutes ago, amitville said:

In my humble opinion Jinger has blown her sister away in such  a classy and elegeant way instead of wearing tops 10 sizes to small at 9 months pregeant she wears skimmers and polo shirt looking like a fashion model instead of a fundy hoe 

The bolded lol. It's funny how they see themselves as modest when that eyeliner and those tight maternity outfits just look cheap and trashy to me.

[BitterApple]

17 minutes ago, RazzleberryPie said:

 

Somehow Jinger still looks really petite, but not frail anymore, either. 

 

Jinger looks like she's put on a healthy five pounds. She's still really slender, but her bones aren't popping out of her skin the way they were post-Joshgate.

[Normades]

On 3/13/2017 at 8:16 PM, leighdear said:

I honestly don't think they rat each other out to their parents that much.  

Well, at least not as much now that Jill isn't around!!

[FairyDusted]

Read ten pages just to say All right Jing! I keep on seeing posts about a ban. Are they putting one on the flock? 

[Albanyguy]

10 hours ago, sometimesy said:

It's funny how they see themselves as modest when that eyeliner and those tight maternity outfits just look cheap and trashy to me.

To the Duggars, the word "modest" means only one thing, covering up bare skin. Exposed flesh is the enemy. Uncovered knees and collarbones are the work of the Devil. A bare midriff is an obscenity, but a midriff covered by a thin layer of polyester stretched so tight you can see every bump and ripple is perfectly okay.

[Churchhoney]

On 3/13/2017 at 8:26 PM, Mya said:

Oh my goodness I had no idea.  14?? that is beyond crazy.  Thanks for the links I had not seen any of this before.  Lots of dirty little secrets.

Of course in that case it's mostly the parents of the two affianced children who have the dirtiest little secrets. 

[Churchhoney]

On 3/14/2017 at 7:47 PM, RedheadZombie said:

I see what you're saying, but if Babe had a problem with any of this, why did he seek out a Duggar girl to start with?  The lifestyle obviously appealed to him.

 

That's what I want to know. It's not as if he met  Jinger someplace on her own and came to like Jinger so much that he decided he was willing to deal with the issues of her family so that he could be with Jinger.                             He explicitly, seems to me, went after a Duggar. That, after all, is what was on offer when he followed Bin and Jess over to Tontitown to check things out. So what was he looking for, if now he's so hot to separate her from Duggardom and Duggarishness? ..... 

Did he see "Free Jinger" on the web and figure he'd get a Duggar-free spinoff out of picking up this particular Duggar? Or what? 

Edited March 16, 2017 by Churchhoney

[Temperance]

I've seen this before and to extent it's true, people see what  they want to see and also other people want them to see. Casual or uncritical fans of the show see the Duggars as a fairytale.  All these children, all these people to play with, all these people to share in "responsibilities" (like chores and such). It "looks" like fun.  I can't remember if Jeremy has any siblings, but if he was an only child and he hinted that he went through an awkward phase (as a teen/tween) where he thought he was chubby, then the Duggar family might be appealing. 

I see Jeremy and to a greater extent Derrick less as patriarch wannabes and more as grown up versions of the kids writing to Shirley Jones to ask if they could join the Partridge family.  Once in you're in the family, reality sets in and it's less romantic than on the outside. 

Jeremy probably already had pastor ambitions thought interacting with the Duggars would help that. 

[Scarlett45]

3 hours ago, Temperance said:

I've seen this before and to extent it's true, people see what  they want to see and also other people want them to see. Casual or uncritical fans of the show see the Duggars as a fairytale.  All these children, all these people to play with, all these people to share in "responsibilities" (like chores and such). It "looks" like fun.  I can't remember if Jeremy has any siblings, but if he was an only child and he hinted that he went through an awkward phase (as a teen/tween) where he thought he was chubby, then the Duggar family might be appealing. 

I see Jeremy and to a greater extent Derrick less as patriarch wannabes and more as grown up versions of the kids writing to Shirley Jones to ask if they could join the Partridge family.  Once in you're in the family, reality sets in and it's less romantic than on the outside. 

Jeremy probably already had pastor ambitions thought interacting with the Duggars would help that. 

I see it as a mixture of two theories. 1. Jeremy is a bit of a fame whore who was attracted to the idea of being a part of a famous fundy family. 2. He wanted a wife he was attracted to (like anyone), who shared many of his beliefs (patriarchal Christianity) and was a guaranteed virgin. I do think he genuinely likes aspects of Jinger's individual personality (they have natural chemistry together) but who she was in the fundy world was a part of the draw in my opinion. She probably thought he was hot (I think he's certainly above average in attractiveness) and he held similar beliefs. 

[GeeGolly]

I picture Ben Googling this podunk rapper and that podunk pastor trying to make his own connections and Jessa saying "Oh maybe he'd be good for Jinger". Who knows how many people Ben might have reached out to that didn't respond - probably most. 

It could be as simple as Jeremy having had a taste of 'stardom' in his soccer years and now was trying to start a career as a pastor. Being married would make him a more appealing pastor in his circles and he had a chance to meet a quasi-famous like-minded woman. He meets Jinger and actually likes her.

[questionfear]

3 hours ago, GeeGolly said:

I picture Ben Googling this podunk rapper and that podunk pastor trying to make his own connections and Jessa saying "Oh maybe he'd be good for Jinger". Who knows how many people Ben might have reached out to that didn't respond - probably most. 

It could be as simple as Jeremy having had a taste of 'stardom' in his soccer years and now was trying to start a career as a pastor. Being married would make him a more appealing pastor in his circles and he had a chance to meet a quasi-famous like-minded woman. He meets Jinger and actually likes her.

I think that's about right...Jeremy might have started with Ben and Jessa thinking it was a good way to cameo on TV or get his name out there, but he seems to genuinely love Jinger, and they might organically have had chemistry from the jump. 

[Albanyguy]

On ‎3‎/‎16‎/‎2017 at 0:55 PM, Churchhoney said:

I see what you're saying, but if Babe had a problem with any of this, why did he seek out a Duggar girl to start with?  The lifestyle obviously appealed to him.

I think Jeremy went into this believing that he could control the situation and turn it entirely to his advantage. He could use the Duggars' fan base and the TLC fame machine to launch his ministerial career, but still avoid being sucked into the batshit crazy family dynamics. He had several advantages going in. He's smarter than Derick or Ben and has more worldly experience under his belt (not that that would be difficult). He was a "sports star" which gave him some masculine cred. Plus, both Derick and Ben entered the family before Joshgate, back when the Duggars were still riding high on a wave of unchallenged moral superiority. It's hard to stand up to your in-laws and assert your own independence when everyone in your world thinks you're lucky to be allowed into their sacred inner circle. By the time Jeremy showed up, the special snowflake image had been publicly shattered, which put him in a better position to leverage some power for himself.

So far, he seems to have been pretty successful. During the courtship he was polite, but paid no attention to Jim Bob's passive-aggressive attempts to play the alpha male. He put up with the silly "Jessa redecorates Jeremy's apartment" episode, but he didn't seem to take it at all seriously. Unlike Derick and Ben, he's removed himself and his wife from her parents' sphere of influence (the Dillards may be residing in Danger America, but emotionally they've never left the TTH). He seems to be encouraging Jinger to try new things and do something with her time besides take endless duck-lipped selfies and post sanctimonious Bible verses.

I'm not saying that he's going to be the perfect husband or that he'll completely liberate his wife from Fundy bondage. Jinger may well be simply exchanging one form of subjugation for another.  But he may be the son-in-law who manages to go over the wall. Time will tell.

[Arwen Evenstar]

2 hours ago, Albanyguy said:

Unlike Derick and Ben, he's removed himself and his wife from her parents' sphere of influence (the Dillards may be residing in Danger America, but emotionally they've never left the TTH). He seems to be encouraging Jinger to try new things and do something with her time besides take endless duck-lipped selfies and post sanctimonious Bible verses.

LO freaking L!  THIS!!!!!

[RazzleberryPie]

My theory on Jeremy = he was already a pastor at that small church plant. He was looking for a wife. He already sees himself as a smalltime 'celebrity' more on the conservative evangelical Christian than fundie scale. 

He soemhow became friends or acquainted woth Bin and Jessa. He probably was checking out the eligible Duggar girls. He probably did think Jinger was pretty, living a similar lifestyle, ready to be married, and a really good pastor's wife candidate. Jessa got the wheels turning, they hit it off, the end.

i don't think he married her solely for the fame train or Duggar name, but it didn't hurt.

As for Jana, the more I see of her on this last counting on series, the more I get why she's single. She's a little bit short, aggravated and just not hateful, but not super nice. I understand that she's over the whole show and frustrated with all the Single Janerella remarks.

However, the guys in her world are either introverted beta males who are snagged by a married sister or mother, and Jana has neither rooting for her unless Jinger finds some mercy. Beta males also get discouraged really easily and give up, and the second Jana gently makes that 'uh-uh' face or acts frustrated over having to devote her time to wrangling kids or being Sister Mom, this type of guy ducks his head into his turtle shell and flees. 

[Churchhoney]

8 minutes ago, RazzleberryPie said:

Beta males also get discouraged really easily and give up, and the second Jana gently makes that 'uh-uh' face or acts frustrated over having to devote her time to wrangling kids or being Sister Mom, this type of guy ducks his head into his turtle shell and flees. 

You know, this sounds exactly right to me. But then I think about the people I know and wonder why so many Beta males seem to be married to very aggressive, bitchy women. lol             I suppose Jana may fall into the unforgivable middle. She's not obliging enough to moan nothing but Baaaaaaaaabe all day long. But not enough of a witch to push her crankiness into the irresistibly attractive category either. 

[Scarlett45]

Just now, Churchhoney said:

You know, this sounds exactly right to me. But then I think about the people I know and wonder why so many Beta males seem to be married to very aggressive, bitchy women. lol             I suppose Jana may fall into the unforgivable middle. She's not obliging enough to moan nothing but Baaaaaaaaabe all day long. But not enough of a witch to push her crankiness into the irresistibly attractive category either. 

A lot of beta males are with women that don't mind being the aggressor or making the first move. Heck even planning things. In their world such a thing isn't allowed. 

IMO more likely than not Jana takes her responsibility to her siblings seriously, and sees the dolts her sister married. She may want an adult companion, a home of her own and a sex life but that comes at the cost of what little freedom she has, and a baby every year. Staying home is the lesser of two evils. I think she and JD will end up running that family and doing they best they can for the little ones. 

[Marshmallow Mollie]

I increasingly believe the theory proffered upthread that Jana stays because she knows Michelle isn't well. I think of the weddings and the reactions the girls had to Jim Bob vs Michelle. I also think of the effect pregnancy had on my body and how her body never had time hormonally or otherwise to recover. Lastly, the birth of my twins is very similar to Josie's birth, and I carried guilt for several years thinking that their prematurity was my fault because my body gave out. My children have no lasting effects other than being pipsqueaks, so I was able to move on from those feelings. If I was that deeply affected, I can't imagine the number it did on her mind when you factor in her religious beliefs.

[RazzleberryPie]

3 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

A lot of beta males are with women that don't mind being the aggressor or making the first move. Heck even planning things. In their world such a thing isn't allowed. 

IMO more likely than not Jana takes her responsibility to her siblings seriously, and sees the dolts her sister married. She may want an adult companion, a home of her own and a sex life but that comes at the cost of what little freedom she has, and a baby every year. Staying home is the lesser of two evils. I think she and JD will end up running that family and doing they best they can for the little ones. 

Not to knock Jana, because I do think she's been a victim in the sense that her mother has hated her since she was in the womb, Jana has followed every single rule in being godly and waiting for Prince Charming, while her family has done nothing to help a sister out. All they've done is dumped any household responsibility on her and not thought twice about it.

However, this whole being obedient and waiting is not working for various reasons. Jana needs to face some fears and be a little more proactive. Some of these Bible women did the same thing - Esther, Ruth, etc. I wish she read this board.

[Arwen Evenstar]

40 minutes ago, RazzleberryPie said:

As for Jana, the more I see of her on this last counting on series, the more I get why she's single. She's a little bit short, aggravated and just not hateful, but not super nice. I understand that she's over the whole show and frustrated with all the Single Janerella remarks.

I'd be snippy too if I had to clean up Howler piss, Josie snot, and be treated like a second class citizen by my married sisters, as well as being left to hold the bag and take the blame for whatever goes wrong. Along with that, being held prisoner by my herp-derp  dad and bloated, gravid termite queen of a mother, who are perfectly content for me to be the family serf.

Free Jana!

Edited March 18, 2017 by Arwen Evenstar
Auto correct thinks it's smarter than me.

[RazzleberryPie]

6 minutes ago, Arwen Evenstar said:

I'd be snippy too if I had to clean up Howler piss, Josie snot, and be treated like a second class citizen by my married sisters, as well as being left to hold the bag and take the blame for whatever goes wrong. Along with that, being held prisoner by my herp-derp  dad and bloated, gravid termite queen of a mother, who are perfectly content for me to be the family serf.

Free Jana!

Oh I absolutely agree. If we see Jana on "Snapped" and find out she scalped Mr. and Mrs. Possum, I might applaud her. She's been treated second class and hated her whole life, but it's time she takes up for herself - she can even do that within Biblical terms - wipes the dust off her feet and actually knocks, seeks and finds for herself, instead of waiting on JimBob or whomever to hand it to her. Cause no body is helping Jana as long as she's doing all the work.

So to keep it on the Jinger thread, I hope Jinger has some compassion and gets out from under Jessa's shadow completely, and she helps out Jana. Jinger is about the only one who truly does seem to have some compassion and love for her siblings.

[lascuba]

1 hour ago, Churchhoney said:

You know, this sounds exactly right to me. But then I think about the people I know and wonder why so many Beta males seem to be married to very aggressive, bitchy women. lol             I suppose Jana may fall into the unforgivable middle. She's not obliging enough to moan nothing but Baaaaaaaaabe all day long. But not enough of a witch to push her crankiness into the irresistibly attractive category either. 

So...Jana's an alpha with a beta mentality so she thinks she wants an alpha male but when they show up she's not interested, and beta males don't fit into how she believes the world and relationships work, so they're a non-starter. Huh, I hadn't though about it that way but it makes a hell of a lot of sense. I've always thought that Jana is naturally a lot like Jessa personality-wise but the beatings did her in, while Jessa wa stronger and survived Duggar discipline. So Jessa has sort of embraced her alphaness and, like her mother, controls her husband in a way that makes him think he's in charge. While Jana doesn't want that dynamic but the conflict between who she is and what she thinks she's supposed to want keeps her in limbo. 

[RazzleberryPie]

3 minutes ago, lascuba said:

So...Jana's an alpha with a beta mentality so she thinks she wants an alpha male but when they show up she's not interested, and beta males don't fit into how she believes the world and relationships work, so they're a non-starter. Huh, I hadn't though about it that way but it makes a hell of a lot of sense. I've always thought that Jana is naturally a lot like Jessa personality-wise but the beatings did her in, while Jessa wa stronger and survived Duggar discipline. So Jessa has sort of embraced her alphaness and, like her mother, controls her husband in a way that makes him think he's in charge. While Jana doesn't want that dynamic but the conflict between who she is and what she thinks she's supposed to want keeps her in limbo. 

I think so. I also think Jinger is far more of a subtle mastermind at 'managing' Jeremy. Out from under dominating Jessa, Jinger might be a little big Stealth. I don't think she's bitchy Stealth, but she's going to run far more of that show that we give her credit for.

[sometimesy]

1 hour ago, RazzleberryPie said:

I think so. I also think Jinger is far more of a subtle mastermind at 'managing' Jeremy. Out from under dominating Jessa, Jinger might be a little big Stealth. I don't think she's bitchy Stealth, but she's going to run far more of that show that we give her credit for.

I would be shocked by this development. Then again, I find Jeremy super phoney on the show (wilted stolen pansies held out for her arrival,'my love'). They don't look like a couple, they look like a groupie and a regular guy who had his first fantasy of soccer fall apart, so he went to another option of lording over people, found himself a marketing tool he could easily manage and went for 'fame'. I think he likes Jinger, but I still think if that show ends abruptly, his church doesn't take off and Jinger becomes Jill level parasite, that wedding will end in a nanosecond. This is still a win for Jinger. She is still being exposed to a more moderate lifestyle. On the other hand, maybe he sees her as coachable and she will morph into a dynamic independent woman just as he tires of her meekness.

[Tabbygirl521]

3 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

You know, this sounds exactly right to me. But then I think about the people I know and wonder why so many Beta males seem to be married to very aggressive, bitchy women. lol             I suppose Jana may fall into the unforgivable middle. She's not obliging enough to moan nothing but Baaaaaaaaabe all day long. But not enough of a witch to push her crankiness into the irresistibly attractive category either. 

I think there are also women who come to seem "bitchy" or aggressive because their beta-male husbands don't step up. 

[Churchhoney]

11 minutes ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I think there are also women who come to seem "bitchy" or aggressive because their beta-male husbands don't step up. 

Good point. It does seem to work both ways. In situations often created by people of either sex who imagine that after marriage their spouses will change to be more to their liking. ...

Surprise! Nope! 

Edited March 18, 2017 by Churchhoney

[ginger90]

16 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

Good point. It does seem to work both ways. In situations often created by people of either sex who imagine that after marriage their spouses will change to be more to their liking. ...

Surprise! Nope! 

Or those who think they will stay the same.........nope!

[RazzleberryPie]

54 minutes ago, Tabbygirl521 said:

I think there are also women who come to seem "bitchy" or aggressive because their beta-male husbands don't step up. 

*COUGH* Kate Gosselin *COUGH COUGH* I think his lack of stepping up made her aggressiveness skyrocket and then implode.

I give Jinger a little more credit than I did at first in regards to not being a doormat. Of course right now, they're in that honeymoon lovey dovey smoochy stage, but I think Jinger has the personality to be able to make it look like she's a lot more compliant, while she's maneuvering things to however she wants them. 

She doesn't shut down and hide like Jana, or bully like Jessa, or just plow through like Dumb Ass Jill, but I don't think Jinger is going to be steamrolled like I thought before.

[DangerousMinds]

7 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

You know, this sounds exactly right to me. But then I think about the people I know and wonder why so many Beta males seem to be married to very aggressive, bitchy women. lol             I suppose Jana may fall into the unforgivable middle. She's not obliging enough to moan nothing but Baaaaaaaaabe all day long. But not enough of a witch to push her crankiness into the irresistibly attractive category either. 

I don't know, Jessa was never super nice or seems particularly thrilled to be a sister mom either.

[Sew Sumi]

Jinger had no buddies past Hannie (#20 was due to be hers). Hannie always seemed to be well-dressed with nice hair, unlike poor Jordyn, who always looked like a sad ragamuffin under Jessa's care. Jill had Jenni, whose expression remains lost as hell, but at least she always had a nice side braid going on when Jill was still at home. 

My point? Jill and Jessa went opposite ways with their own kids. Based on what we know does that mean that Jinger will be more in the Jill mode of, if not neglectful, not really erring on the side of caution? Jessa's transformation to the good has been amazing. I just hope that if Jinger chooses to emulate one of her sisters, the differences between Spurge and Izzy's upbringings are noticable enough to err on the side of Jessa's style. 

[RazzleberryPie]

I think Jinger comes off as more phoney than any of them with people outside their family. The constant eye rolling, and her gushy 'oh thank you SO MUCH' to total strangers just seems overdone and fake, like she'd roll her eyes and laugh the second people leave.

Now within the family, Jinger really seemed like she knew details about her siblings, and like most of them were actually friends with her. Maybe she gets this luxury because Jana was laying down the discipline and Jessa was terrifying everyone. Jill was trying to kill everybody with her vast medical knowledge (feel free to vomit).

I think Jinger will be a good mom. Far better than Dumb Ass Jill, who likes the idea of being a mom, or telling others how to be a mom, rather than actually parenting her own child. Dumb Ass. 

[Churchhoney]

2 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

I don't know, Jessa was never super nice or seems particularly thrilled to be a sister mom either.

I've always kind of thought that Jessa is enough on the witchy side of things for that to be one of her traits that attracted Bin. Lots of guys have been attracted to the "hot mean girl." And if you're also shopping among fundie tv girls, as Bin was, she'd definitely count for that. She may be sort of like having Calvin as your partner -- sending you hellfire and damnation with her eyes all the time. I think Bin might get off on that, kind of. (Or at least did get off on that, back when he was first attracted .... He wouldn't be the first one who did.)

[Nysha]

4 hours ago, Churchhoney said:

I've always kind of thought that Jessa is enough on the witchy side of things for that to be one of her traits that attracted Bin.

I don't think Ben noticed anything about Jessa except "She's hot & I'm gonna get some!" We analyze the Duggar girls' behavior and attitude way more than any of their suitors ever will. Most of them buy into what is being sold on the show, that the girls are all sweet, compliant, and have a heart for serving Jesus (and everyone else). 

[Micks Picks]

I think  you are right Nysha.  And I'm not so sure we are right in our analysis.  It seems we were wrong about Jill being a good mother type based on her behavior with the kids assigned to her,  Derrick being great for her because he had an education and a full time job, Jessa being a bitch and potential neglectful mother, and all manner of things about this family.  

[Churchhoney]

4 hours ago, Nysha said:

I don't think Ben noticed anything about Jessa except "She's hot & I'm gonna get some!" We analyze the Duggar girls' behavior and attitude way more than any of their suitors ever will. Most of them buy into what is being sold on the show, that the girls are all sweet, compliant, and have a heart for serving Jesus (and everyone else). 

Well, you're definitely right about that being the advertising! 

[Marigold]

3 hours ago, Micks Picks said:

I think  you are right Nysha.  And I'm not so sure we are right in our analysis.  It seems we were wrong about Jill being a good mother type based on her behavior with the kids assigned to her,  Derrick being great for her because he had an education and a full time job, Jessa being a bitch and potential neglectful mother, and all manner of things about this family.  

That's a good point.  No one has really turned out the way we thought. 

[GeeGolly]

I think we have been close in identifying personality traits. Parenting styles, not so much.

[Albanyguy]

12 hours ago, RazzleberryPie said:

I think Jinger comes off as more phoney than any of them with people outside their family. The constant eye rolling, and her gushy 'oh thank you SO MUCH' to total strangers just seems overdone and fake, like she'd roll her eyes and laugh the second people leave.

 

I'm not sure if it's deliberate phoniness, though. I think it may be more a case of extreme social awkwardness. She simply doesn't know how to  relate comfortably to "outsiders". None of them do, really, but I think it's harder for Jinger than her older sisters. She seems to have been even more deliberately isolated from the outside world than the other girls.

I think that Jim Bob and Michelle decided long ago that Jinger was a potential source of trouble. They were never as ignorant of social media as they pretended to be. They must have been well aware that Jinger had her very own fan base who were pulling for her to rebel against her parents and escape from the cult. The knowledge that there was actually a website called "Free Jinger" must have given them fits. So they responded by doubling down and keeping an extra tight leash on this one. The result was that she emerged even more stunted and socially awkward than her siblings. She may overcome this in time, especially since her new life with Jeremy has taken her away from the circle she grew up in.

[GeeGolly]

I see Jinger as socially awkward, but actually more comfortable with outsiders. She had to lead Jessa around by the nose both at the coffee shop where they volunteered and during the engagement scavenger hunt. Jill comes next and then Jessa in comfort around outsiders, although Jessa is improving. I think Jill thought she was the social worldly one, being a midwife and all, but I think Jinger does better with outsiders, though still awkward.

[queenanne]

20 hours ago, DangerousMinds said:

I don't know, Jessa was never super nice or seems particularly thrilled to be a sister mom either.

I don't want to flat out characterize Jessa as a narcissist, but I don't think it's tough to see Jessa as the person who thinks her children are an extension of herself, therefore if they look bad, unkempt, etc., it's on her.  She may have felt no such compunction for her charges ("those aren't my kids!").  

It's possible what we are reading from Jinger is, gasp, a daughter with the sincere proverbial "heart for others".  She may care about other people's comfort and putting them at ease.  Which would be good for a minister's wife, I note.  

[GeeGolly]

22 minutes ago, queenanne said:

I don't want to flat out characterize Jessa as a narcissist, but I don't think it's tough to see Jessa as the person who thinks her children are an extension of herself, therefore if they look bad, unkempt, etc., it's on her.  She may have felt no such compunction for her charges ("those aren't my kids!").  

It's possible what we are reading from Jinger is, gasp, a daughter with the sincere proverbial "heart for others".  She may care about other people's comfort and putting them at ease.  Which would be good for a minister's wife, I note.  

That make total sense about both Jessa and Jinger.

[lascuba]

21 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Jinger had no buddies past Hannie (#20 was due to be hers). Hannie always seemed to be well-dressed with nice hair, unlike poor Jordyn, who always looked like a sad ragamuffin under Jessa's care. Jill had Jenni, whose expression remains lost as hell, but at least she always had a nice side braid going on when Jill was still at home. 

My point? Jill and Jessa went opposite ways with their own kids. Based on what we know does that mean that Jinger will be more in the Jill mode of, if not neglectful, not really erring on the side of caution? Jessa's transformation to the good has been amazing. I just hope that if Jinger chooses to emulate one of her sisters, the differences between Spurge and Izzy's upbringings are noticable enough to err on the side of Jessa's style. 

I think what happened is that Jessa treated her siblings as her siblings. She had a hell of lot more responsibility for them than any sibling should have, but she did what was demanded of her without playing mommy on an emotional level, so when she had her first child he felt like her first child and she was fine. Whereas over-enthusiastic, incapable-of-boundaries Jill took the whole buddy system way too seriously and burned herself out, which is why she's turned into such a sloppy, careless mom...in her mind, she's been there, done that, what harm could possibly come from a baby teething on a fan pole? 

I suspect that Jinger might be more like Jessa than Jill in that respect...she might have been more attentive to her siblings than Jessa was, but I don't see her as being all that emotionally involved. 

[Marigold]

We have been more accurate with the actual Duggar kids, parents and Anna.

We have had way more trouble figuring out Derick, Ben and Jeremy.  I think we all overestimated their world experience and their education.  Clearly, we fouled that one up!  

We underestimated the brain suck mechanism that the Duggar have.  Anyone who gets around the Duggars hears a huge sucking sound...suddenly they can't think logically anymore...

[Arwen Evenstar]

2 hours ago, Marigold said:

We have been more accurate with the actual Duggar kids, parents and Anna.

We have had way more trouble figuring out Derick, Ben and Jeremy.  I think we all overestimated their world experience and their education.  Clearly, we fouled that one up!  

We underestimated the brain suck mechanism that the Duggar have.  Anyone who gets around the Duggars hears a huge sucking sound...suddenly they can't think logically anymore...

Both their brains and what little spirit they had left has been sucked out of them by the Deatheaters, Xanaxia and Boob.