S05.E14: Never Say Goodbye

[starfire]

I don't understand Amber being interested in Matt. He doesn't work. I guess he just sponges off her for everything. He apparently is a deadbeat dad to numerous (7?) kids and it sounds like he lied to her over it. He probably owes thousands in child support so if he did get a job his income would be garnished. How can she respect that?  He's not attractive. I don't get it.

 

I guess him being there to take care of Leah on the 4 days a month she is there, and to probably do most of the housework/cooking (and to put up with Amber's BS) is good enough for Amber?

 

On the other hand, Amber is no catch. She doesn't work. She isn't improving her life in any way, like by going to college even part-time. She claims she wants Leah more but won't even get her ass out of bed on the days she is there. She is lazy and boring as hell. All she seems to do for the most part is laze around (and change her hair color).

 

Actually, I guess they are a perfect couple.

[EuropeanGirl]

I think you guys probably have said it all, but here are my two cents:

Farrah - I may be naive about this, but I think she cries real tears of sadness when it comes to Derek. I think she couldn't help but ask herself what would life with him be like and that she tends to idolize it (We did have some bad times, but overall we we're amazing etc.). Especially since she didn't find the right guy for her after 6 years, she tends to over-glorify her relationship with Derek. That is, if she's not only putting on a show (which is likely, I admit). Sophia creeps me pretty much every time she is shown.

 

Amber - We assumed before, but that scene with ANOTHER breakfast in bed proved that Amber can say whatever she wants, but she is not a mother to Leah. I hope she doesn't get 50/50. It would be an offense to parents who are fighting for it and take care of their child in the meantime when he/she is around. She is irresponsible and thinks that being a mother includes only fun activities like going out for ice cream, pumpkin hunting (I assume that was?), the park etc. If she's not up to making her breakfast, what would Leah expect when it comes to school (getting up and doing homework)? To Leah it must seem that it's always Mother's day at Amber's house. Say whatever you want to say about Gary, but at the end of the day, he is the more responsible parent. Also, I don't think it's bad that Leah refers to Gary and Kristina as her parents. I think it's easier and more simple for her when she talks about them than to always emphasize 'my dad and my stepmom'. And another thing, I don't agree with Amber that stepparents are only the parents' love partners. Kristina is raising her and is involved in that whole process, not just caring about Emily and the other daughter. Like it or not, but she is a caregiver to her. I had a friend in college that talked refered to her stepdad as her parent and not until long ago did I find out that her biological father died when she was only a few months old and she considers her stepdad her father.

 

Catelynn - It has become too much. I have said all about it in her own topic. Saying she has two daughters should be a signal for therapy and a red flag for B&T. I still think they shouldn't have come to the wedding. To me, that is going over the line. They are not your old neighbors or friends of your parents!

 

Maci - I was interested in the semi-discussion she and Ryan had when he drove Bentley back home. To me, he wanted to understand why isn't it possible doing his way, but she just wasn't having it. It just shows that it's not only him that is impossible to talk to about parenting sometimes. I know, I know, her reaction came after he brought Bentley late. As far as she was concerned, that was it for her at that moment and I get it. I agree with the poster about Ryan getting Bentley if he guesses the name of his friend. Also, if I was Maci, I would try to arrange an extra day to make up for that one day if Ryan actually spends time with him on that extra day. Poor Bentley. Ryan has no interest and Bentley probably has no clue to what he did to deserve that.

Edited January 20, 2016 by EuropeanGirl

[Cosmocrush]

Of course Sophia talks with a creepy voice. Deborah and Farrah have been talking to her in creepy voices her entire life.  I'd be surprised if she could speak in a normal first grade voice.   That kid needs to be in school - around some other children and less time around her mother who talks to her like she's a girlfriend instead of a first-grader. 
 

I find it odd that they refer to him as "Daddy Derek", I don't know why that is necessary. He's her father no matter what. To me it's almost as if Farrah is wanting to make the distinction between Derek and whatever "Daddy" may come in the future.

I think that's exactly  why Farrah started with the "Daddy Derek" stuff when Sophia was just a toddler - or I guess as soon as Farrah realized she could get sympathy and cash [remember she had some book about her teenage dream dying?]   with that story.
 
On the Aftershow when Jenelle asked Farrah if she would ever have another child, I could swear I heard Farrah say "Well, if I ever get married again...."     before she went on to say that the stuff about adopting an older child.   

[Cosmocrush]

Maci - I was interested in the semi-discussion she and Ryan had when he drove Bentley back home. To me, he wanted to understand why isn't it possible doing his way, but she just wasn't having it. It just shows that it's not only him that is impossible to talk about parenting sometimes. I know, I know, her reaction came after he brought Bentley late. As far as she was concerned, that was it for her at that moment and I get it. I agree with the poster about Ryan getting Bentley if he guesses the name of his friend. Also, if I was Maci, I would try to arrange an extra day to make up for that one day if Ryan actually spends time with him on that extra day. Poor Bentley. Ryan has no interest and Bentley probably has no clue to what he did to deserve that.

[bolding mine]  I think a great example of this was when he asked if Bentley could stay and spend Sunday night with him and Maci's response was not only NO but her reason was "Because".   That's not exactly the response by an adult.  But then neither is shotgunning beers in a parking lot in my opinion.  

[WhosThatGirl]

Well, I mean.. I don't begrudge Maci doing her thing and having fun sometimes (i.e the shotgunning  beers in the parking lot) and obviously, she does that fun stuff when Bentley is with his Dad and Jen and Larry but I digress with yes, like others have said, she would never give up HER time with Bentley, her head would spin. Granted, it's Ryan. I seriously sound like an idiot when talking about these two because neither of them can seem to just be adults with each other and the thing is, I want them to! I don't even know them personally but most episodes, I just want these two to be friendly towards each other so that Bentley can be happier. I want Ryan to be a good dad and not keep going two steps forward and a thousand steps back. It makes me sad for Bentley, he really is the one who suffers because Ryan isn't great. But Maci is not the greatest ever and the fact that she answered, "because" shows her age. She is still young. 

 

I have no words on Amber. I just don't understand staying in the house all day with nothing to do. I would go stir crazy. She may not be hurting for money right now but find something to do with your time. Plus, Matt has always creeped me out. Who dates a twitter follower?

 

I used to think that the reason that C&T talk(ed) about Carly so much was show enhanced, producer driven in the past. Now it seems like it's more than that. Now that the fourth wall is broken, it's still strange how much they talk about her. I don't really know why they were invited to the wedding either. Except I guess it's good for the shows story.  So, Tersea and Brandon didn't want to meet Butch but they came to the wedding? I guess that means they didn't talk to Butch at all? 

Edited January 20, 2016 by WhosThatGirl

[Snarky McSnarky]

Anyone else notice Tyler dump sugar straight out of the Domino bag into that cup of coffee/tea? Glad to see the healthy lifestyle is working out.

He was also laying down a smokescreen when they were outside talking in one scene.  I'm guessing she still smokes, too.  Just not when cameras are around.

 

Things I'm tired of:

 

Sophia's voice (just fucking nails on a chalkboard)

Sophia's face (sorry but she looks like a gremlin)

Amber doing nothing productive (she really needed fucking breakfast in bed as if she has this hard life that earns that sort of treatment)

Tyler and Catelynn talking about Carly (she's not your kid anymore, she's better of without you, enough already)

The words Daddy Derrick (just call him her dad already. Enough with the Daddy Derrick shit)

The Maci/Ryan go around (both of them need to grow the fuck up already. It's been too damn long for this to be going on)

 

I have more but I'm done for now.

I'm very tired of permanently unemployed, uneducated white trash flaunting houses, shiny new cars, and leisure travel obtained with money they did not have to work/struggle for.  And I'm exceedingly tired of those same people acting like they are providing some kind of meaningful public service to teens by having cameras follow their lazy asses around a few weeks each year.  

[alexa]

I think on the aftershow Maci explained the situation with Ryan well.  She wants Ryan to want to spend time with Bentley, not because everyone else wants him to be a part of his life, but because he truly shows he wants to.  And based on the footage we see, he doesn't show any enthusiasm with his son, which is just odd.  Bentley is a super cute and fun little boy, and also appears very smart.  Who wouldn't want to spend time with him... Ryan is a young dad who is the perfect age for enjoying time with him, and Bentley is at the perfect age as well.  It is really sad actually.  I just can't buy his random proclamations of wanting time with his son anymore...he just has proven over and over he doesn't care enough, unfortunately.

 

As for everyone's discussions on Amber and Matt...I totally agree.  The laziness, lack of employment for either one of them, etc, is just simply crazy.  Matt could at least have a job...I get that Amber might be home for the cameras, but Matt doesn't need to be sitting on the couch with her.  They are so lazy.

[snarts]

 

If you watch Bentley closely, he is always very uncomfortable around Ryan.  If Jen and Larry are there too, he's ok.  But when he's alone with Ryan, he is never ever happy and looks uneasy and uncomfortable.  Honestly I think people cut Ryan a LOT of slack that he doesn't deserve.  He's a terrible parent to Bentley.  His age is no longer an excuse - he's 26!  If any of the moms acted like him, they'd be ripped to shreds.  I also think he's high on pills most of the time and I hate seeing Bentley in a car with him b/c of that.

 

I marvel at Ryan living at home, stuck in his adolescence, a perpetual teenager, and his parents let him. Job? Money? Independence? Ambition? None. Hopes, dreams? He seems to care about nothing. He can't manage to sustain a relationship with a women for any length of time. He is indifferent to Bentley and is openly dismissive any time anybody shows concern for Bentley's welfare -- he is so narcissistic, he is jealous of his own son. Bentley sees this perfectly plainly. So do Ryan's parents. I think they allow their socially inept loser son to continue sponging off them indefinitely because it's how they continue to be in Bentley's life. If Ryan moved out, Ryan would have to actually drop Bentley off at his parents' for the weekend, which would then create drama with Maci. This way, they can do Ryan's parenting for him, without rocking the custody boat.

 

I strongly agree with these comments.  The double standard has always been strong with Ryan, including stupid Dr. Drew.  He's a grown man, not a teenager.  His parents continue to enable his selfishness by allowing to remain home and expecting very little with regard to his relationship with his son.  When Maci holds him accountable, she's called selfish.  I get that she's annoying on a lot of fronts, but I have no issue with the way she deals with Ryan and I think she's a great parent to Bentley.

[ghoulina]

but I give him no latitude whatsoever and basically think that he's a lazy piece of shit.  He was 15 minutes late picking his kid up from school and then didn't even apologize, just made Bentley feel bad about feeling bad.

 

THAT'S what really made me mad, the way he dismissed Bentley's feelings. My kids are homeschooled, but there was this one time when my oldest was doing day camp at our zoo and I was about 10 minutes late coming to get him, because there was a horrible accident and the freeways were all blocked up. I remember swooping up to the front where he was the only kid standing with the poor zoo educator, and apologizing profusely to both of them. My son DID look worried, like Bentley did, and I felt SO bad for him. I explained what happened and tried very hard to reassure him I'd never actually "forget" him or be late if I could help it. 

 

Ryan didn't even have an excuse, that we know of. As I said earlier, he probably overslept. We rag on Amber about sleeping, but I think Ryan probably goes all afternoon! And then when Bentley is upset about it, he's all - "It was just fifteen minutes!" No apologies, no reassurances.Just time to get food, because he likely hasn't eaten yet that day.  He is totally a selfish prick, just like you said. 

 

Also- why has no one mocked the hallmark poem Farrah claimed Derek wrote for her?

 

That poem was awful. I feel like I just tried to block it out. I do remember one part where he said something like, "You put me from bad to good". Something to that effect. His word choice was definitely lacking. 

 

really wonder if Catelynn's anxiety wasn't so much about seeing Nova and Carly together but about worrying that Tyler or another family member would say or do something offensive to Theresa or Brandon that could make them cut off contact or put Catelynn in the middle of a Tyler-B&T feud again.

 

My speculation was that she was worried about asking B&T if Butch could meet Carly. And she knew it was probably going to get shut down. And she probably didn't even care, but Tyler and Butch were really pushing for it. So she felt like she might be kind of caught in the middle, which I think may be the story of her life. 

 

I also think he's high on pills most of the time and I hate seeing Bentley in a car with him b/c of that.

 

Remember when he got in that horrible accident, because he was "reaching for his phone"? Scarily, I don't think his actions would be any different with Bentley in the car. 

 

One little thing that surprises me so much though, is that Farrah is always perfectly done up and Sophia is always a mess.  Farrah is dressed head to toe in dressy outfits, full makeup, not a hair out of place, accessories, matching handbag.  Then Sophia is the complete opposite.  She never has her hair brushed, and I don't know who cut her bangs but they are an uneven mess and too high up.  I'm just shocked that Farrah doesn't have Sophia done up perfectly every day.

 

It's probably because Farrah only shows up when it's time to film, and Michael is the one bathing her, dressing her, and styling her hair. 

[woodscommaelle]

When Leah asked if she could lick the batter, Matt seemed to almost force the thing on her.  It made me uncomfortable.  And it looked like Leah felt the same way.  It was weird.  And when he 'pushed' one of Crystal's kids out of the way?  I thought at first he was joking, but then, no, I don't think he was joking.   That dude sucks.

 

I don't think Amber gives a shit if she had custody (50%) of Leah or not.  I feel like she's just doing it bc she thinks she 'should' be doing it. 

 

Was Heather hanging out in Amber's closet?

Edited January 20, 2016 by woodscommaelle

[suzeecat]

I think Derek is the perfect "boyfriend" for Farrah.  He's long gone, so he is perfect in her mind.  He can do no wrong and Farrah can make up the perfect scenario in her imagination about how perfect their life together would have been.  No other living, breathing man will ever be good enough for her.  I hope Farrah will get some kind of counseling for Sophia; I found it quite alarming that she was talking about wanting to be dead.  And to me, that would be a little warning sign that it's time to dial back all the Derek-glorification.

 

Matt = creepy

 

I wonder if Catelynn is suffering a little bit of post-partum depression. 

[Tatum]

 

He's long gone, so he is perfect in her mind.  He can do no wrong and Farrah can make up the perfect scenario in her imagination about how perfect their life together would have been.  No other living, breathing man will ever put up with her shit for more than a few weeks before running the other way.

 

I fixed that for you, Suzeecat :)

[FlowerofCarnage]

I think on the aftershow Maci explained the situation with Ryan well. She wants Ryan to want to spend time with Bentley, not because everyone else wants him to be a part of his life, but because he truly shows he wants to. And based on the footage we see, he doesn't show any enthusiasm with his son, which is just odd. Bentley is a super cute and fun little boy, and also appears very smart. Who wouldn't want to spend time with him... Ryan is a young dad who is the perfect age for enjoying time with him, and Bentley is at the perfect age as well. It is really sad actually. I just can't buy his random proclamations of wanting time with his son anymore...he just has proven over and over he doesn't care enough, unfortunately.

As for everyone's discussions on Amber and Matt...I totally agree. The laziness, lack of employment for either one of them, etc, is just simply crazy. Matt could at least have a job...I get that Amber might be home for the cameras, but Matt doesn't need to be sitting on the couch with her. They are so lazy.

You would think that Ryan would enjoy spending time with Bently especially given how Bentley is into the things Ryan is into like motorcross.

[suzeecat]

In the quick Q&A with the TM2 girls at the end, it looked like Jenelle had plumped her lips up a bit.

Edited January 20, 2016 by suzeecat

[DangerousMinds]

When welfare mom Krystal first showed up this season Amber said she hadn't seen her in a long time. I totally believe she only shows up for filming and to collect that check. I hope welfare deducts the money from the show.

I hate to assume but Krystal has all the markings of a typical welfare mom. The more kids you have, the more money you get. I have a niece whose only reason for being born is because the other kids had gotten too old and her mom needed a new kid to keep the welfare checks coming.

This is not true. The amount of TANF assistance one can get is limited at the time of first application. If someone has 3 kids at that time, having one or even four more will not increase the monthly amount. Food stamps are different and will increase with each child. This is called a "family cap" policy.

 

ETA:: family cap policies do vary by state.

 

http://www.ncsl.org/research/human-services/welfare-reform-family-cap-policies.aspx

 

In this case, Amber and her cousin live in Indiana, which does have a family cap on TANF benefits.

Edited January 20, 2016 by DangerousMinds

[heatherchandler]

Maci needs to not allow Ryan to drive anywhere with Bentley, if he can't put Bentley in a car/booster seat. Even Amber can handle that basic parenting skill.

 

In Tennessee, the law states that after the child is over 20 pounds, they should be in a booster "if one is available."  So, he's not actually breaking the law.  My son is Bentley's age and he is very tall.  Boosters are super uncomfortable for him.  I am in Illinois and over 30 pounds, kids don't need one, so he doesn't use one.  I would prefer he use it, but he is just fine strapped into the seat belt (with shoulder strap) in the back seat.

 

He seems to care about nothing. He can't manage to sustain a relationship with a women for any length of time. He is indifferent to Bentley and is openly dismissive any time anybody shows concern for Bentley's welfare -- he is so narcissistic, he is jealous of his own son.

 

I disagree with this, I do not believe he is in any way, shape or form jealous of his son.  I agree that he is indifferent.  For sure!

[Rebecca]

I can understand Amber being upset or whatever at hearing Leah say "my parents" when meaning Gary and Kristina, especially given Amber's personality, but it was so wrong and immature of her to express those feelings to Leah in any way. A mature person would be thankful that Leah has Kristina to care and love her and that Leah has such a good relationship with her. Of course, with Amber's low IQ this will never happen and she'll just continue to alienate "boo boo" with her reactions and comments. Speaking of, I have always thought "boo boo" is a particularly poor nickname choice since Leah was unplanned and born to a teen mom, given that "boo boo" is another word for mistake...I hope Leah never makes that connection. Why Amber chose that nickname...who knows? Matt remains creepy. The breakfast in bed for Amber was sickening. Matt knows he needs to keep his meal/fame ticket happy.

Maci, it is so incredibly tacky to be 24, a mother of 2 and shot gunning beers on national tv. I haven't seen anyone shot gunning beers since early college (and no, your 20 year plan for getting your Associate's does NOT count), maybe even high school! She annoys me.

I can't and won't comment on Catelynn, Tyler and all the Carly drama. EDIT: Also, how old is Nova? Did she really need to eat ranch dressing?

Farrah is clearly projecting all her dreams and fantasies on Derrick and his death. It is weird they called Derrick's step mom his mom...just completely bypassing the crazy that is Derrick's actual mom. Farrah is 'normal' with them because they kiss her ass something fierce, probably knowing they'll be cut off otherwise. Sophia remains disturbing in all ways. Given the odd phrasing and her narcissism I'm sure Farrah wrote that "poem" " from Derrick" herself.

Edited January 20, 2016 by Rebecca

[alexa]

In Tennessee, the law states that after the child is over 20 pounds, they should be in a booster "if one is available."  So, he's not actually breaking the law.  My son is Bentley's age and he is very tall.  Boosters are super uncomfortable for him.  I am in Illinois and over 30 pounds, kids don't need one, so he doesn't use one.  I would prefer he use it, but he is just fine strapped into the seat belt (with shoulder strap) in the back seat.

 

In many states, state law doesn't actually cover safety issues with their lax laws.  The idea of the booster is to get the seatbelt to rest on the child in the correct place for safety purposes.  Most children Bentley's age, even if tall like my own son, requires a booster to truly be safe with the use of the seatbelts in the car.  Some states do it right by requiring a fairly tall height before boosters are not required any longer.  A state law that goes by pounds is kind of missing the point.  And 30 pounds is very low.... I find that to be a very lax law, and doesn't have anything to do with height.  Very odd that they came up with that, imo.

Edited January 20, 2016 by alexa

[gunderda]

 Did anyone see Matt grab that kid & kinda push him out of the way? (I think it was one of Krystal's kids)

I know this didn't look good at all on screen but I have a feeling he was basically joking around.  I have uncles that will do stuff like that often with younger kids - they will over dramatize basic functions and kids think it's funny.

 

Farrah sure changes her opinion on Daddy Derek often. I thought he treated her like shit.   Also, Sophia saying that she wanted to die kinda broke my heart. Even though she's a brat.

I was coming to post this as well.  I haven't watched her original season but I thought their relationship didn't end well.  I don't blame her for trying to change history to make herself feel better (or maybe worse) but there is NO WAY they would be sooooo in love if he was still alive.  He would have left her ass a long time ago. 

 

And was Derek adopted? I thought he also had darker skin but both of his parents were white as can be. 

Again I could be wrong since I haven't seen a picture of him since probably when it was first shown (which was probably her original episode)

 

I'm also curious as to why Sophia is SO obsessed with having a dad.  Her grandpa is around quite a bit so I feel like that should fill up that space a little bit, but she acts like she has no male figure in her life and constantly sees kids at schools with dads or something.  

[Rebecca]

I have a friend with a 14 year old son who has basically never had his bio dad in his life but has had an amazing step father very involved since he was 2-3. He loves his step dad and chose to start calling him dad early on. But, he still misses his bio dad even though he never really knew him at all and his bio dad lives in the same town and chooses to not be involved. There is still the mystery of wanting to know who he is and about him. I'd assume that mystery and desire would be stronger if he were deceased so I understand Sophia wanted her dad or "a dad" and how any other man can't completely fill that role. Farrah also probably has not helped with putting it in her head that other guys, Simon for example, are an option for a "daddy".

[NikSac]

When Leah asked if she could lick the batter, Matt seemed to almost force the thing on her.  It made me uncomfortable.  And it looked like Leah felt the same way.  It was weird.  And when he 'pushed' one of Crystal's kids out of the way?  I thought at first he was joking, but then, no, I don't think he was joking.   That dude sucks.

 

I noticed the same things. He was just awfully rough with the kids for no apparent reason. Not saying he beat them or anything, but the pushiness bothered me.

[ClassyCourtHeels]

 

And was Derek adopted? I thought he also had darker skin but both of his parents were white as can be. 

Again I could be wrong since I haven't seen a picture of him since probably when it was first shown (which was probably her original episode)

 

 

 

No way. The dad, Derek, and Sophia all have the exact same face. 

[MrsSmartyPants]

I laughed way too hard at our first shot of Amber. Laying her lazy ass in bed while Matt and Leah wait on her. I wonder if it was 10:30. Never change, Amber. SMH

 

 

I think it may have been well past 10:30 - since after Matt left the room and Amber was still talking about how much she misses Leah, etc - Amber was eating her breakfast and Leah was eating Spaghetti-o's in a paper bowl.  Surely these two brain trusts would have given Leah her BREAKFAST before "lunch" ... right?

[shelley1234]

Let's be real...if it wasn't for Teen Mom, Ryan would have NOTHING to do with Bentley at all.  He'd be a complete deadbeat dad.  Bentley is a paycheck for Ryan, so he has to at least pretend to be a caring, loving dad.  I did have to laugh...a lot...when Ryan's friend asked him if he was going to go to court for FULL CUSTODY.  Sure buddy.  Like that would ever happen.  

 

I actually feel the same to a lesser extent about Farrah.  I think she would have totally allowed her parents to raise Sophia so she wouldn't be burdened with it if it wasn't for the show, the money and how she wants to be seen.  And the idea that she wants or plans to adopt a child...god help that child!

[lezlers]

If you watch Bentley closely, he is always very uncomfortable around Ryan.  If Jen and Larry are there too, he's ok.  But when he's alone with Ryan, he is never ever happy and looks uneasy and uncomfortable.  Honestly I think people cut Ryan a LOT of slack that he doesn't deserve.  He's a terrible parent to Bentley.  His age is no longer an excuse - he's 26!  If any of the moms acted like him, they'd be ripped to shreds.  I also think he's high on pills most of the time and I hate seeing Bentley in a car with him b/c of that.            

I totally agree.  I don't understand people cutting Ryan slack and making excuses for him because he's "young."  26 is not young.  He's closer to thirty than twenty for Christ sake. I'm sure Larry and Jen are great people but they straight fucked up raising Ryan.  I've also noticed Bentley usually looked uncomfortable when he's just around Ryan. I think trying to pin that on Maci is one hell of a stretch.  I think people blaming it on her are doing it because they plain don't like her.  Just because you happen to not like somebody doesn't mean everything bad that ever happens is their fault.  Reminds me of how the Kailyn hate from TM2 often translates into a "Jo can do no wrong" sentiment.

Edited January 20, 2016 by lezlers

[MyPeopleAreNordic]

FYI, I posted an interesting blind item that some people are speculating is about Matt in Amber's thread (it seemed more appropriate that it go there).

I think Matt's shady and gross, but I guess at least someone is up with Leah and making her breakfast while Amber sleeps in. If Amber was single, would she actually get up with Leah in the morning and get her butt off the couch during the day to do stuff with her since no one else would be around? Or would Leah Shirley be like Gracie (TM2's Leah's daughter), making toast/breakfast while mommy's curled up "being a sleepy head?"

I love how OVER IT Amber's mom is about Matt. She knows it's fruitless and exhausting to challenge Amber about him, so she just stays quiet with a "Sure, Jan" look on her face while Amber goes on about how great he is and their wedding.

[Maharincess]

This is not true. The amount of TANF assistance one can get is limited at the time of first application. If someone has 3 kids at that time, having one or even four more will not increase the monthly amount. Food stamps are different and will increase with each child. This is called a "family cap" policy.

ETA:: family cap policies do vary by state.

http://www.ncsl.org/research/human-services/welfare-reform-family-cap-policies.aspx

In this case, Amber and her cousin live in Indiana, which does have a family cap on TANF benefits.

The niece I'm talking about is over 30 now and I know nothing about welfare. It used to be very true.

[Tatum]

I totally agree.  I don't understand people cutting Ryan slack and making excuses for him because he's "young."  26 is not young.  He's closer to thirty than twenty for Christ sake. I'm sure Larry and Jen are great people but they straight fucked up raising Ryan.  I've also noticed Bentley usually looked uncomfortable when he's just around Ryan. I think trying to pin that on Maci is one hell of a stretch.  I think people blaming it on her are doing it because they plain don't like her.  Just because you happen to not like somebody doesn't mean everything bad that ever happens is their fault.  Reminds me of how the Kailyn hate from TM2 often translates into a "Jo can do no wrong" sentiment.

 

I fully admit to enjoying Ryan's scenes as I find him foxy, but I agree, he's a shitty father and he expects Maci to bend over backwards for him, and when she doesn't, she's a bitch. Sure, she could have been nicer about responding ("because"), but really, what could she have said? They've had the argument multiple times that Maci gave him an extra day during the week a few years ago and it pisses her off that Ryan isn't around that much when it's his time with Bentley.

 

He has probably skipped at least a couple days in the last month alone (where Bentley stayed with Jen and Larry and didn't even interact with Ryan), yet when Maci accepts a weekend overnight invite for Bentley, she should rearrange her schedule to comp the time for Ryan. It's like not completing homework assignments all term, and then, at the end, when you're facing a failing grade, asking your teacher for extra credit assignments.

 

But if Maci were to say all that, that Ryan doesn't use the time he DOES have with Bentley and therefore she's not giving him an extra day,  then he would accuse her of starting a fight with him. There really wasn't a good way to answer other than giving him what he wanted. Also, when they were arguing in the driveway, Maci said something like, check your text messages, or, go back and read your messages. I suspect that Ryan probably insulted her or called her names, but only showed the cameras the phone where Maci's "because" message was on display. Ryan likes to curse out Maci then bitch that she's "difficult".

 

I think Maci can be a petty bitch, no doubt. But dealing with Ryan must be so tedious.

[ghoulina]

In Tennessee, the law states that after the child is over 20 pounds, they should be in a booster "if one is available."  So, he's not actually breaking the law.  My son is Bentley's age and he is very tall.  Boosters are super uncomfortable for him.  I am in Illinois and over 30 pounds, kids don't need one, so he doesn't use one.  I would prefer he use it, but he is just fine strapped into the seat belt (with shoulder strap) in the back seat.

 

Only 20 lbs??? When I bought boosters for my kids, the boosters themselves stated they were for kids 40 lbs and up. That seems crazy to me, 20 lbs is not much at all. Anyhow, I don't know about state laws, but safety guidelines state a child should be 4'9 before discontinuing use of a booster. My oldest is 7, almost 8, and about average for his age - he's only 4'2. Guidelines aren't really about weight, but about height. They want the shoulder and lap belt to fall in the proper places for maximum safety. If I took away my son's booster, the shoulder belt would be across his neck. 

 

Does Maci still use a booster with Bentley, I wonder?

 

I'd be concerned about Ryan driving with Bentley, even with a booster. What if he dropped his phone again?

 

No way. The dad, Derek, and Sophia all have the exact same face.

 

Agreed. Maybe he got his darker complexion from his mother? The woman they showed was his step-mother, correct?

[Rebecca]

Agreed. Maybe he got his darker complexion from his mother? The woman they showed was his step-mother, correct?

Yes, this is Derrick's mom: https://mobile.twitter.com/clark_stormie She doesn't seem to have a dark complexion, maybe derrick was really tan in pics we've seen? Hell, maybe Farrah demanded he always be super tan. According to his mom Farrah made a lot of demands on him. That twitter hasn't been updated in years (and shows she's kinda crazy, IMO) but you can google her name and read more about her and what she has said/done/etc. I think she seems nutty. Sophia really has the crazy genes, only her father's father seems normal.

[GreatKazu]

To touch upon the welfare cap and Krystal, not sure about other states but here in my state there are loopholes. One can keep getting welfare as long as they remove themselves from welfare for, I think three months. After that they can reapply and it begins all over again. Someone told me this when I inquired how was it their step-sister could be on welfare so long.

I don't know if Krystal is on welfare, but I can see she is looking like shit.

[Emmierose]

Hey Tyler? Nut job?  Carly was not calling you Daddy.  Even if Brandon was not anywhere around, and Carly was saying, "Daddy! Daddy!", she isn't calling YOU Daddy.  You know why?  Because you're not her daddy.  This fucking guy I swear.

 

I understand why Brandon and Teresa keep the adoption open.  Teresa clearly has affection and maternal feelings towards Catelynn and Catelynn is just this heartbreaking bundle of sad.  They will never close the adoption for her sake.  Tyler however needs to take several hundred seats. 

 

One more time for Tyler...Tyler you are a douche.  Carly is not your "daughter".  You are not her dad, and she wasn't calling you Daddy.  

Oh and one last thing, Tyler's sister was a stripper?  Hang on while I go put on my surprised face...

[langway]

Okay I'm watching this now and when Ryan picked Bentley up from school, was he late for that? He asked Bentley how long he waited and Bentley said "15 minutes". That ain't right.

[Nire]

I want to root for Ryan because Maci annoys me but he is such a screw up!  

 

I hope B&T don't close the adoption.  I don't think the visits are having a negative impact on on Carly and they all agreed to an open adoption.  To close it for no reason would be wrong in my opinion.  

 

I thought Amber looked pretty awake in her breakfast in bed scene making me think it might have been staged.  When my kids come in to wake me up on rare occasions when I sleep in I'm usually not sitting up waiting.  However I typically get to sleep in after waking up several times during the night with one of the kids.  Somebody was wondering how she could sleep through the noise of breakfast being cooked.  It's amazing what you can ignore when you are exhausted.

 

I wasn't shocked by Sophia wanting to join Derek.  My husband's grandmother recently passed and my five year old asked if he could join her.  He only meant for a visit.

[FanOfTheFans]

Derek was fair skinned with blonde hair. If you Google Farrah Abraham Derek Underwood, pics come up. Sophia does look just like him facially minus the dark hair she has.

Edited January 21, 2016 by FanOfTheFans

[shelley1234]

 

 

[toodywoody]

I agree Farrah needs to wear a damn slip. Shut up with the Daddy Derrick shit. Just say your dad. The crying, omg girl stop.

Amber, Amber, Amber, everyone has ready said it all already. Leah is the cutest little girl.

Tylers tattoos are gross. Wtf.

Edited January 21, 2016 by toodywoody

[FanOfTheFans]

Thanks Shelley. I can't figure out how to post pics on this site with an ipad. I should correct and say he has dark blonde hair. His eyes look blue.

[NikSac]

I wasn't shocked by Sophia wanting to join Derek.  My husband's grandmother recently passed and my five year old asked if he could join her.  He only meant for a visit.

 

Yeah I must say that didn't shock me either. When I was around 10 or so my beloved cat died and I kept saying I wanted to die so I could go see her. Obviously it way upset my parents and the next day I had an emergency appointment with a psychiatrist, but I wasn't suicidal, I just wanted to see my cat and didn't 'get' it.  Even at 10 I didn't quite understand what I was saying, so Sophia saying that at 6 makes me think she doesn't know the full extent of what she's saying. Then you've got Farrah over-dramatizing what an amazing person he was, Daddy he was, etc. and it's probably even more confusing for her.

 

I'm no Farrah (or Sophia for that matter) fan, but I can understand this piece of it.

[MollyZee]

Fuck Ryan, man. I mean he's easy on the eyes but what a doucheturd he is as a HUMAN PERSON with a child. Damn! He was late to pick poor Binny up in the first place, then decides to make them even later getting home to Maci's on account of he was hungry.... and I don't even know how long that line at the drive-thru window was but evidently this wasn't just some damn pit stop if the ride home from school was long enough to where his exhausted 6 year old took his own shoes off to get comfortable enough to nap in the backseat!! Say what now?! Yeah, Ryan gets no mercy from me and Maci is all that child has. Mimi and Papa are fine as occasional stand-ins but they aren't parenting that child and lord knows neither is that useless sperm donor. GAH.

Poor Catelynn. Whoever said she was a big ol' pile of sad is spot on. She needs therapy, stat. Am I the only one who thinks Tyler exaggerated his suicide attempt story just a wee bit for dramatic effect? He had me right up until "...had to walk around with rope marks around my neck for days afterwards...I'm surprised I ain't got scars now..." I know, I'm going straight to hell.

Are we all just going to pretend we didn't see Amber and Mama Amber in their matching "stable parents raise happy kids" tshirts? Hmmm, alright. I'll play along. Only those morons would hit up an apple orchard on the off season and then scratch their collective heads wondering why there was nothing to pick. Good on Leah for sticking to her guns with Kousin Krystal there. "Your parents??" "Yup. My dad and my stepmom." Girl, PREACH.

This show makes my brain hurt.

Edited January 21, 2016 by MollyZee

[lilmarysunshine]

Am I the only one who thinks Tyler exaggerated his suicide attempt story just a wee bit for dramatic effect? He had me right up until "...had to walk around with rope marks around my neck for days afterwards...I'm surprised I ain't got scars now..." I know, I'm going straight to hell.

 

No.

[lidarose9]

I can understand why Catelynn is suffocating with anxiety -- it's cuz she insists on pretending she has an ideal family when it's just not. I mean, weddings are stressful in the best of circumstances, but here we also have a staggering array of domestic complications all intersecting in one event: We have nervous adoptive parents meeting birth family for the first time, several of whom have said unforgivably hurtful things in the past which now they regret but it's still out there, and we have a family full of addicts celebrating with booze and strippers, and we have an ex-con ex-husband trying to hang out with his domestic abuse-surviving recovering addict ex-wife's new husband. Oh and we have little Nick finding out his stepbrother tried to kill himself when he was 12 years old. Plus Catelynn feels bad about her weight and is experiencing all the new mother emotional things, including feeling blue about Carly, which is to be expected. Plus TV cameras everywhere! This wedding has all the makings of an absolute disaster. Really, it would have been so much easier if they'd eloped.

 

Tyler and Catelynn are so invested in the "happily ever after" storyline of their relationship, so they MUST have a big fancy wedding with the whole family and a strapless white dress and big cake and a band and a dance. I suppose MTV reinforces that constantly, how they made the right decision to have Carly be adopted, cuz that's what the show is about after all, right? 

[Snarky McSnarky]

Tylers tattoos are gross. Wtf.

Just a guess, but perhaps that solid black Batman (assuming that's what it is supposed to be) is a cover-up.  He may have had something on that arm that he later regretted, and the only solution was to completely obliterate it with solid black.  

 

With all of the traveling and disposable income the people on these shows have, one would think they would seek out some reputable artists.  Most of the work I've seen on them is not very good.

[EuropeanGirl]

No.

It didn't seem legitimate for one second. It's like someone gave him a cue for sharing a sob story because he's aware that many people dislike him online. It was looking so like please-have-some-sympathy-for-meeeeee kind of thing. I'm sorry if it did actually happen though, but he just didn't seem sincere to me.

[Maharincess]

I didn't believe Tyler either, that's why I didn't join in on the "Tyler broke my heart" posts. I think if that had really happened he would have brought it up by now. We all know he'll do anything for attention.

[EuropeanGirl]

I think so, too. If that was the real deal, he would have talked about it ages ago and wouldn't wait for the series to reinstall. He wouldn't risk it.

[WhosThatGirl]

I said it makes me sad what he went through but I do think he may have made it sound worse. I mean, he probably did go through hell with Butch and I still stand by what I said that I don't really like Butch. The things that he said to those kids is awful. And on CAMERA. I mostly feel bad for Cate, though. She lived with Butch and April for most of that time period and Tyler at least had his Mom. Also what makes me mad about Tyler's story is that he kept on telling it when he realized Nick was sitting there and when Nick said, "you tried to kill yourself" Tyler shushed him with a "no".. BUT THEN KEPT GOING WITH THE STORY. Like, no. Stop telling it, now. I also agree that B&T keep the adoption open for Catelynn. From my understanding, she has never posted pictures/videos on social media, or at least not the way Tyler does and she seems to respect what they want. Tyler seems annoyed with it all, like "they were on the show, they knew what they were getting into it. And they do stuff all the time for tv and magazines". 

[ghoulina]

Hey Tyler? Nut job?  Carly was not calling you Daddy.  Even if Brandon was not anywhere around, and Carly was saying, "Daddy! Daddy!", she isn't calling YOU Daddy.  You know why?  Because you're not her daddy.  This fucking guy I swear.

 

No, shit. Yea, even if Brandon was nowhere in sight, she would have been calling because she didn't see him. Tyler is so delusional. Also, I feel like he has a lot of nerve saying that on camera, where Brandon will eventually see it. That's pretty rude. 

 

Okay I'm watching this now and when Ryan picked Bentley up from school, was he late for that? He asked Bentley how long he waited and Bentley said "15 minutes". That ain't right.

 

I don't think Bentley knew how late Ryan was. I think he just made some sort of sullen comment about it, and Ryan protested - "Just 15 minutes!". As in, "Hey, at least I wasn't an hour late, that's more my MO. Fifteen minutes ain't no thing, Benjamin. I mean, Bentley".

[EuropeanGirl]

Fifteen minutes ain't no thing, Benjamin. I mean, Bentley".

HAHAHA

[teapot]

Yes, this is Derrick's mom: https://mobile.twitter.com/clark_stormie She doesn't seem to have a dark complexion, maybe derrick was really tan in pics we've seen? Hell, maybe Farrah demanded he always be super tan. According to his mom Farrah made a lot of demands on him. That twitter hasn't been updated in years (and shows she's kinda crazy, IMO) but you can google her name and read more about her and what she has said/done/etc. I think she seems nutty. Sophia really has the crazy genes, only her father's father seems normal.

did I read somewhere that Derek's mom bought him a bottle of vodka that they found in the car?  (or am I writing crazy TM fanfic in my head again....?)