S07.E07: Family Matters

[Higgins]

I have anorexia; I'm currently hospitalised and have been for the last seven months. I also have three daughters and have struggled with my ED throughout their lives since this isn't my first hospitalisation... So I'm not going to win any awards for Mother of the Year - my husband and my parents are currently parenting my children.

I have this overwhelming fear and guilt that I'm ruining my children's childhood and I hope they will grow up and have empathy for my struggles. I hope they will forgive my absences throughout their formative years. But if they don't, if they're damaged and angry at me, well then, I would understand that too and while I can't help having a mental illness, they didn't choose to be my kids or have a crazy mum. My kids and my husband are the victims of my anorexia, not me.

It's much easier to say Bethenny should have compassion for her mother when you're removed from the situation. A mental illness does not give one a free pass from the damage we cause, it merely helps explain it and from what I can tell Bethenny's mother has never tried to make it right. She's never attempted to heal the havoc she wreaked on her child and so for that reason I don't think she deserves Bethenny's sympathy.

Lack of insight is a huge problem with mental illness. You don't seem to have that hurdle. Many mentally ill people don't have the capacity to recognize that they are ill. Some never will.

[ScoobieDoobs]

Wait a minute, so Brian Moylan says this in his recap for the ep in NY Mag-

 

"At the fight, Kristen got really into the action, and I found it quite curious until I realized that both the boxer they were rooting for, his entire entourage of trainers, and the friend of Carole’s who manages his career were all wearing shirts and hats emblazoned with the logo for E Boost, the vitamin snake oil company owned by Kristen’s husband, Josh, the pile of vomit you slip in while walking from a tailgate party to the football stadium. What exactly is the connection between E Boost, Carole’s boxer friend, Kristen, and having this broadcast on Real Housewives? It’s not as a direct of a connection as jamming a Skinny Girl product into every shot, but there is something fishy going on here."

 

What, what, what, what????  OK, I totally thought Kristen's change-over, from being horrified at the fight to being into it, was strange & seemed very, very fake.  But I didn't notice that Josh's crap was being peddled/promoted by the fighter she was all of a sudden rooting for.  Did anyone notice this?  If Brian isn't kidding about this & it's true . . . oh man, that is all kinds of ick, yuck & blech.  Even when Josh isn't present, the aura & stench of his dickhead-ness is always around.

 

Now I'm wondering if B is gonna sneak in SkinnyGirl promos whenever she can.  I'm kinda surprised she didn't give the stepfather a SkinnyGirl cocktail.  Er, why didn't she give stepdad a SkinnyGirl t-shirt, as a warm and fuzzy (for Bethenny, that is) parting gift?  Or at least a package of SkinnyGirl chips.

Edited May 20, 2015 by ScoobieDoobs

[Sincerely Yours]

I have anorexia; I'm currently hospitalised and have been for the last seven months. I also have three daughters and have struggled with my ED throughout their lives since this isn't my first hospitalisation... So I'm not going to win any awards for Mother of the Year - my husband and my parents are currently parenting my children.

I have this overwhelming fear and guilt that I'm ruining my children's childhood and I hope they will grow up and have empathy for my struggles. I hope they will forgive my absences throughout their formative years. But if they don't, if they're damaged and angry at me, well then, I would understand that too and while I can't help having a mental illness, they didn't choose to be my kids or have a crazy mum. My kids and my husband are the victims of my anorexia, not me.

It's much easier to say Bethenny should have compassion for her mother when you're removed from the situation. A mental illness does not give one a free pass from the damage we cause, it merely helps explain it and from what I can tell Bethenny's mother has never tried to make it right. She's never attempted to heal the havoc she wreaked on her child and so for that reason I don't think she deserves Bethenny's sympathy.

But having sympathy is a helpful tool in forgiveness and healing if only for herself. There are no free passes in life. No one gets out alive but it's how we choose to handle whats thrown at us. How we can be better from our experiences. How we can enjoy life instead of a being a prisoner in it. She has the power. There will always be things that affect our lives, it's how humane we can be while tackling life's unfairness and inconveniences and derailments.

 

I would also like to point out that you are also a victim of your disease. Your body suffers, the quality of YOUR life suffers so please don't dismiss your own struggles out of guilt. It's so commendable that you understand the affect you are having on others and that's a beautiful thing to be able to do but please make sure you save some of that strength for yourself. Prayers to you on your ongoing struggle and it sounds like there's a survivor in there. God Bless!

[Mrs peel]

Something screwed up with my DVR and didn't get the whole show so I'm recording it again (I did see Beth with her stepfather).  Anyhow I'm reading the blogs.  According to Bethenny:

 

It has been a long time coming, and as I wrote in A Place of Yes, I don’t wear my story. I, genuinely, am not angry. I think I have longed for a person to discuss the craziness of my past with. I'm an only child and essentially an orphan, so there is no one I can turn or talk to that can acknowledge what I remember to be true. I do think that people do their best; all I can do is pay it forward by being the best mother to my daughter that I can possibly be.

 

Yes, Beth you do wear your story.  You've been wearing it on every Bravo show you've been on.  You're an orphan?  No, you're not.  You have a daughter.  You're also middle aged.  You have no one to turn to or talk to that acknowledge what you remember to be true?  That's wearing your story. 

 

And now your divorce has been how many fold worse than your childhood?  My God, you were raised by wolves.  What has Jason done to you in the divorce?  Shared custody with the other parent of your child?  Money?  Yes, divorce is not fun.  But please, recognize you are playing the victim...from your childhood to your divorce.

 

I don't think Beth knows how to look around her and be happy for all she has.  She's thrives on negativity and putting down everyone around her.  That poor waiter who is only doing his job.... 

There aren't enough thumbs up for this post, for me.  I was very put off by her saying the divorce was worse than her childhood.  NO, just no. 

 

I was also bugged by her saying she was broke 6 years ago (and seemingly implying her step-father should have done something about that).  You were NOT broke, you were living alone in a very nice one bedroom apt on the UES in NYC, an apt owned by your father (this one or bio Dad? I'm not sure) for which I don't think you paid rent.  You were able to take trips, take private cars around town, you had a friend who let you stay in her Hamptons home.  You chose not to have a full time job but to pursue starting a business (Bethenny bakes at that point, and tv).  You had a nice life, and if you had chosen to have a full time job you would have likely had more $$.  Your choice, but don't act like you lived off ramen noodles and tuna fish.

 

Similarly, I was totally bugged by Sonja saying how her life is so difficult she has trouble some days getting out of bed.  You receive a huge child support check each month for a child who lives elsewhere most of the year, you live in a multi-million dollar home on the UES in NYC.  Get a fucking life Sonja!  You know who has trouble getting out of bed some mornings - people who are ill, people who have to take 3 buses to a minimum wage job so they can feed their children; people who are taking care of their aged parents, etc.  NOT YOU Sonja.

20 years ago she was single, she was only responsible for herself and it is very easy to push things to the back of your mind, it is a survivor mechanism, all that changed when Bethenny had her own daughter because now she has a point of comparison, now that she has a daughter and loves her so much and would do anything for her, now is when she feels the pain of her parents not being able to do the same for her. It must still hurt her very deeply and I do remember her saying that she wanted Bryn to be soft and pure and not a warrior like she is.

But the “raised by wolves” line comes from long before her daughter was born.  I can agree if her life was as bad as it sounds (did her mother really try to commit suicide in front of her?), but she’s bright enough to know she needs serious – not tv – therapy.  Why she hasn’t gotten it is a mystery.  Or maybe it hasn’t helped and she’ll always be like this.

The art show was incredibly weird. That clown? No. Just no. Also, Victoria appears talented, but I don't know if I could deal with a nude of my daughter. Uncomfortable!

I understand Europeans are more comfortable with nudity.

 

But if it's a book, take your time if you need to. (Looking at you, George R.R. Martin!)

Sorry Ghoulina, but George, ignore her,  get your ass in gear and finish the next book.  You are killing us!  Oh, and tell HBO to stop changing things.

My brother is a professional writer, has been for decades. His take has always been that this is his job. He writes every day, goes to work, as it were. It's his job and he treats it as such. His comment to me is that inspiration is for amateurs. Professionals doubledown and do it, just get it done; that's what he's paid to do. Period. A deadline is a deadline and if you can't make it, someone else will. Can't take pressure? Time for a career change.

Not being a writer, professional or otherwise, I don’t know that I would take it that far.  But it does seem to me that Carole is not so much a “writer” as someone who “writes.”  She doesn’t have a set focus, she hasn’t written that much, and I think we all know she doesn’t rely on her book/article money to live on.  So she bugs me when she does the “I’m a writer” stuff, especially since she's apparently comfortable with having people know she hasn't even come close to meeting her deadline.

I suspect that if she were 20 years younger, people would still be knocking her for hipster pretensions. It really comes down to how you feel about Carole, I think - what if LuAnn had showed up with that hat?

Luann would never wear that hat, or at least not at that occasion.  She is always dressed for the occasion. 

 

Nice touch by Luann’s daughter to thank Bethenny for coming to her art show.  That was sweet.

 

The only person making money off the abundance candles Sonja sues are the guys who sold them to her.  Seriously, she lives in her own little world. 

[WireWrap]

Wait a minute, so Brian Moylan says this in his recap for the ep in NY Mag-

 

"At the fight, Kristen got really into the action, and I found it quite curious until I realized that both the boxer they were rooting for, his entire entourage of trainers, and the friend of Carole’s who manages his career were all wearing shirts and hats emblazoned with the logo for E Boost, the vitamin snake oil company owned by Kristen’s husband, Josh, the pile of vomit you slip in while walking from a tailgate party to the football stadium. What exactly is the connection between E Boost, Carole’s boxer friend, Kristen, and having this broadcast on Real Housewives? It’s not as a direct of a connection as jamming a Skinny Girl product into every shot, but there is something fishy going on here."

 

What, what, what, what????  OK, I totally thought Kristen's change-over, from being horrified at the fight to being into it, was strange & seemed very, very fake.  But I didn't notice that Josh's crap was being peddled/promoted by the fighter she was all of a sudden rooting for.  Did anyone notice this?  If Brian isn't kidding about this & it's true . . . oh man, that is all kinds of ick, yuck & blech.  Even when Josh isn't present, the aura & stench of his dickhead-ness is always around.

 

Now I'm wondering if B is gonna sneak in SkinnyGirl promos whenever she can.  I'm kinda surprised she didn't give the stepfather a SkinnyGirl cocktail.  Er, why didn't she give stepdad a SkinnyGirl t-shirt, as a warm and fuzzy (for Bethenny, that is) parting gift?  Or at least a package of SkinnyGirl chips.

Josh/company sponsored the boxer, I thought Kristen mentioned that during that scene. Yes, she was into it when that boxer was in the ring, she was being a good wife supporting her husband and his business. LOL

[Juneau Gal]

Last night Bravo lost a viewer.

 

Someone who thought they might be on TV and invited her friends and family over to watch her big moment was left in horror as she came up on TV screens all over America, pulled and tucked and painted up and wearing a red feather boa,... just as Bethany voiced a comparison to "Creatures in a Star Wars bar scene."

 

I bet that scream could be heard throughout Manhattan.

Wait. What? Giselle, are you saying that lovely Liza lookalike was you?!

[Higgins]

T

 

 

But having sympathy is a helpful tool in forgiveness and healing if only for herself. There are no free passes in life. No one gets out alive but it's how we choose to handle whats thrown at us. How we can be better from our experiences. How we can enjoy life instead of a being a prisoner in it. She has the power. There will always be things that affect our lives, it's how humane we can be while tackling life's unfairness and inconveniences and derailments.

 

I would also like to point out that you are also a victim of your disease. Your body suffers, the quality of YOUR life suffers so please don't dismiss your own struggles out of guilt. It's so commendable that you understand the affect you are having on others and that's a beautiful thing to be able to do but please make sure you save some of that strength for yourself. Prayers to you on your ongoing struggle and it sounds like there's a survivor in there. God Bless!

That is truth.

It's unfortunate that Bethenny had a shitty childhood. Some of what she described and what John confirmed sounds frightening. But I don't want to hear about it anymore. I really don't. At some point, you have to pick yourself up and move on. Bethenny should really consider getting a real therapist because her current one hasn't helped her accomplish shit.

This. And honestly, if her publisher expected a draft six months prior to filming and Carole still hasn't delivered, it doesn't really reflect well on her. The impression I've been given is that Carole really isn't trying that hard to finish the product for her publisher. It's probably just a joke to her that a deadline has been set. My friend is an editor for a publisher and while she expect some delays with drafts, she really hates when people delay the draft by several months and aren't even apologetic about it.

I just want to thumbs up but for some reason I have troubles doing so on my Windows 8 laptop. Anyone have a fix for that?

[Giselle]

Wait. What? Giselle, are you saying that lovely Liza lookalike was you?!

 

 

Ha! Ha! Sweetie I'm on the west coast and look nothing like Liza!  :-)

 

For the record can't stand Liza, her or her mother. Yeeech!

[ghoulina]

I understand Europeans are more comfortable with nudity.

 

She's from Connecticut!!! 

 

;P

[archer1267]

Re Robin Cofer, the "swami priestess" - she's popped up before and I wish, in a way, she was a RW, because she DOES have the goods…a few years ago, she and her husband tried to sell their Trump Tower condo for nearly $35M. I clicked through some of the pictures and it looked familiar - I'm thinking that Ramona had her domestic violence fundraiser/fashion show there (the one that George crashed). I started watching RH because I wanted to see how the wealthy and fabulous lived, but then again, her NewAge speak would get old fast…and I say this as someone who is open to meditation, alternative medicine, etc.

Edited May 21, 2015 by archer1267

[AnnaL]

An interesting article on the feud between Lu/Carole/Heather. Carole confirms that everything was fine with Lu until the end of the season when they went to T&C.  One thing that I had never thought about before was that even though Lu was demoted last year, she got a lot of camera time, which is sometimes unusual for a "friend of". Heather had this to say about that:

 

"When Luann was demoted and she came back on the show, I was a true friend to her. I invited her to all my scenes and was there to support her, to show the world the Lu—how I call her Lu—that I knew was in there and existed, but that was really just a short-lived thing," Heather said. "The Countess, like I said, has reared her ugly head and it's not at all attractive or interesting to me whatsoever."

 

http://www.eonline.com/news/658098/the-fractured-real-housewives-of-new-york-city-what-is-happening-between-carole-heather-and-luann

 

Heather's passive agrresiveness in all her glory.

 

That is what I don't like about Heather, if you are going to be a bitch, then be it. Just don't be a bitch and pretend to care when you really just don't.

 

So basically Heather is reminding Luann that she was demoted last season and she "helped" her out by inviting her to her events? LOL, well one thing about Heather is that her sense of self importance is certaintly as big as her mouth.

[Trooper York]

Also she has a "European hairstyle" all over.

 

It is good to be consistent. Just sayn'

[AnnaL]

I get that it's tough to grow up with a parent who has mental health issues but Bethenny seems to gloss over that as a reason fir her messed up child and not have any empathy for what seem like severe issues. Who tries to commit suicide in front of their child, Bethenny? Someone who has a disease! Hell she even blamed her mother for going to a mental institution of it was a spa or a trip. I am not saying Bethenny needs to have a relationship with her mother or even forgive her but the lack of compassion about someone who was mentally ill (and abused) is also not healthy for her.

 

Except that her mother seems to have a mental illness in the likes of amnesia , ala KIm Richards?

 

She doesn't acknowledge that anything out of the ordinary happened in Bethenny's childhood, she doesn't admit to ever doing anything wrong and basically calls her daughter a liar. You can forgive if somebody asks for forgiveness but how can you forgive when the person who inflicted you so much pain acts like it never happened?

[biakbiak]

Except that her mother seems to have a mental illness in the likes of amnesia , ala KIm Richards?

 

She doesn't acknowledge that anything out of the ordinary happened in Bethenny's childhood, she doesn't admit to ever doing anything wrong and basically calls her daughter a liar. You can forgive if somebody asks for forgiveness but how can you forgive when the person who inflicted you so much pain acts like it never happened?

I stated in the post you quoted that I don't think that B needs to forgive her mother at this point her mother is basically irrelevant and she is not going to change but for B to move on and be healthy she really has to acknowledge her mother's issues which apparently included suicide attempts and being institutionalized. Accepting that could be a start in Bethenny actually healing and letting go of that anger.

[motorcitymom65]

Heather's passive agrresiveness in all her glory.

 

That is what I don't like about Heather, if you are going to be a bitch, then be it. Just don't be a bitch and pretend to care when you really just don't.

 

So basically Heather is reminding Luann that she was demoted last season and she "helped" her out by inviting her to her events? LOL, well one thing about Heather is that her sense of self importance is certaintly as big as her mouth.

I don't really think anyone needs to remind the audience that Lu was demoted last year. Lu herself has spoken of it quite a bit, including with her current tag line, which goes something like "one should learn never to count out the Countess".  

 

I think that Heather was quite clear and not passive-aggressive at all.  She didn't mince her words or hold back in her feelings for Lu at all. She said Lu was once a nice person and that they were truly friends but that now Lu is a bitch.  She was clear they won't be friends again. I would say that Lu was more passive-aggressive with her comment that certainly if an apology was offered, they could move forward, all the while probably knowing by what goes down in T&C that this is not going to happen. I actually like Lu, but am fascinated as I watch her try to work her way out of this thing that she has started. Heather hadn't said one bad word about Lu either on the show or in the press (that I can find) until she called up and started bad mouthing her when she was on WWHL - completely putting her on the spot.  It was all kinds of tacky to go after Heather in her moment on the show like that. I was almost hoping that Heather would do the same to Lu when she was on last week, but apparently Heather isn't built exactly like that. Too bad. I would have kind of enjoyed that. 

[motorcitymom65]

I have zero idea how to insert tweets, but Beth posted a picture of herself with a new shorter hair cut. It looks good. Also, Carole is with her today at her book signing. It seems like they spend a fair amount of time together and have become good friends. 

[Celia Rubenstein]

When rules are applied unevenly to a group of people, I can see where anger, annoyance, and even jealousy can take over (been there, done that). But like you said, Beth was savvy enough to negotiate a contract that allows her to have more time with her kid and other special treatment. Kadooz to her. I think Andy was so desperate to get her back on the show he was willing to break his own rules.

 

Hasn't Sonja used the same excuse for missing events many times, too?  She only has her daughter part time and wants to spend every minute she can with her?  I don't recall her ever being called out for choosing to be with her daughter instead of attend a shooting.  I think this is only an issue because it is Bethenny, and there is some resentment for her returning, as you suggest. 

 

Or maybe people are just glad when Sonja doesn't show up, so no one complains.  I could see that being true, too.  The woman is a complete disaster.  

 

OK, fine & dandy -- not a difficult concept to comprehend, that creative people produce differently.  But taking 4 or 5 years to produce one piece of so-so work ain't good, no matter how you cut it.  To me, that stinks.  And her work ethic, as we've seen, really sucks.  I wouldn't wanna be her publisher.  Seriously. 

 

I can't buy into the suggestion that Carole just "creates" differently from other authors and needs her time and space, either.  While that may be true of many other writers, I don't think it is the case with her.  She didn't explain the delay in her producing work to her publisher/agent person as being due to a need to work her way through her creative process.  She said she had to be isolated to write, and she just felt more like partying and socializing right now.  That is not the same thing as "creative process" to me.  It's a lack of discipline.  A matter of priorities.  Right now having fun is Carole's preference. Not writing.  That is why there is no product for publication.  It's not due to her artistic process.  I'm not really sure she has one. 

Edited May 20, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[Eliz]

I know it wasn't connected to anything else, but that footage of Sonja working out in her bathroom instantly became one of my all-time favorite Housewives moments. Even if nobody had been showing her shoes. Just being in the bathroom. The things that go on inside Sonja's house never disappoint. If it weren't for this show giving her life some structure, she could easily go full Grey Gardens in no time at all.

Can we get a WIG COP ruling on Bethenny's friend Robin at that lunch in Miami? I am terrible at spotting wigs, but even I thought I saw something there.

Eight is too many. The complaints about too much Bethenny or not enough Heather or not enough of all of them together -- all valid complaints, in my opinion -- all come back to the bottom line that it's just too many to deal with.

[WireWrap]

I have zero idea how to insert tweets, but Beth posted a picture of herself with a new shorter hair cut. It looks good. Also, Carole is with her today at her book signing. It seems like they spend a fair amount of time together and have become good friends. 

Here is the link..... https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CFeDBk_WIAAI42r.jpg:large

Edited May 20, 2015 by WireWrap

[motorcitymom65]

Here is the link..... https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CFeDBk_WIAAI42r.jpg:large

Thanks WireWrap!

[goofygirl]

Chiming in here... Really TIRED of the "Bethenny" show. Ugh.  So you had a crappy childhood.  So did a lot of us and somehow we've managed to get through it, (some of us go to counseling!) and just resolve to not let it affect the rest of our lives.  So go do that Bethenny, please.

 

[Crikey]

I have zero idea how to insert tweets, but Beth posted a picture of herself with a new shorter hair cut. It looks good. Also, Carole is with her today at her book signing. It seems like they spend a fair amount of time together and have become good friends. 

I found a bunch of pictures on wireimage.com/  of Bethy and Carole at their joint book signing in Bryant Park today.  Not Carole's new book, though.

 

Bethy's new European haircut looks great!  ;)

[Lola16]

All I could think of with the clown was that major creepy clown in Poltergeist--and about 10 seconds later I saw an ad for the Poltergeist remake (which I intend to skip, thanks) with the new creepy clown jumping out of the dark. Yikes and no.

 

And the whole Bethenny storyline? Bored. We all have shit in our lives. Really, we do. Frankly, yours isn't all that much worst than anyone else. You're alive (unlike friends who lost 3 kids to cancer and are still buried in grief years later). As noted endlessly, you're not actually homeless. Having to wait for your multi-million $ second apartment to be customized to your every whim doesn't = homelessness. Hey, you can always camp out at your place in the Hamptons, inconvenient though that may be. Your parents sucked? Join the club. My grandmother and her siblings lost their mother then were abandoned, dumped in an orphanage when their father 's second wife decided she didn't like kids.

 

Shit happens. Deal. If you can't deal don't bore everyone else-they have their own problems and aren't being paid megabucks to display their dysfunction on  cheesy TV show.

 

Not criticizing you for an instant, Ghoulina, don't misunderstand.

 

My brother is a professional writer, has been for decades. His take has always been that this is his job. He writes every day, goes to work, as it were. It's his job and he treats it as such. His comment to me is that inspiration is for amateurs. Professionals doubledown and do it, just get it done; that's what he's paid to do. Period. A deadline is a deadline and if you can't make it, someone else will. Can't take pressure? Time for a career change.

There are differences between being a creative writer and a content writer.  When I have to write specific content, I am assigned a topic, length and deadline (among other parameters).  Some assignments are a breeze; others are a grin & bear it and I do just buckle down and crank something out.  When I am composing a creative piece, it's my vision and my timeline.  For Carole, it's the latter with a deadline. 

 

I thought, in  a previous episode with Carole and her editor, that she had a contract with a deadline for this next book.  IIRC, when told about the deadline, she giggled and pretended to be unaware of any deadline.  Was there any mention of Carole having been given an advance for this book?

 

If she had a contract and/or a deadline, I think she needed to set ink to paper, fingers to keyboard or have started dictating sumthin' pretty fast.  She might want to get harried ;)

What bugs me about Carole's scenes this year about her writing is her faked carefree attitude about missing deadlines etc.  She knows how it works.  She signed the contract.  I think it's all an act for the show.  Like she's decided that this would be her persona this season.  Suppose now that Aviva isn't around to criticize her, Carole is playing a scatter brained ditz.  Jessica Simpson meets Carrie Bradshaw.  It's inauthentic and boring to me.

 

This came up a few days ago and a poster (I don't remember who it was) brought up a point that probably most of us hadn't thought of.  When they arrived at Sonja's they also each had to have their mics put on.  Also, in her blog, Heather said 10 am.  I think this is the 'actual' time they had to be there to prepare for the scene.  The official time for filming to start was probably 10:30.

 

Add to that, getting uptown during that time of the day can be a nightmare.  Bryn is in preschool so it may start later.  I thought Beth actually got there around 11:30.  Probably a little earlier because she had to have her mic put on as well.

'twas me.  Call time was probably closer to 9am.  Calculate in midtown rush house traffic and that's why Heather and Kristen had someone else take their kids to school that day (you can't drop off your kid extra early!).

[LilaFowler]

Heather will NEVER go into Sonja's home again.  She will NEVER be friends with Luann again.  In the words of Bethenny, do you really think I care?  Heather seems to think that people should be devestated if she decides that she doesn't like them.  Her little annoucements about burning bridges is so self-important.  Get over yourself, mama.  You ain't shit.

[charming]

I wonder if Dorinda's the type who tells you all the terrible things her man does then is shocked...shocked!...when you don't like him.

[biakbiak]

I wonder if Dorinda's the type who tells you all the terrible things her man does then is shocked...shocked!...when you don't like him.

Well in this case the things Ramona mentioned about him weren't terrible (chunky and loud). No matter how much Ramons pushes the matter not living in Manhattan is not a character flaw, plus he clearly hasn't spent that much time there since her daughter has been living with her as long as they have been dating and clearly doesn't stay there when she is there.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

I'm surprised Ramona mentioned Dorinda's "lovely home in the Berkshires" as a positive, considering the fit that she threw last season when she was forced into going there.  You'd think that'd be something she'd snark on.

Yeah it's kind of funny Ramonas trU divorce renewAl has her training like a champ-she looks great- talking in a femme bot Michelle Duggar sweet voice (her toast to her friends, how long she's had these friends etc) and you just know she raging on the inside. She's so trying to be nice and spin it, it'll make it all the better when the Turtle Tirades and no filter Ramona ride back into town!

[sasha206]

I wonder if Dorinda's the type who tells you all the terrible things her man does then is shocked...shocked!...when you don't like him.

 

Absolutely.

 

i said in the previous episode thread that Dorinda is one of those blowhards that talks about how she doesn't put up with any bullshit...unless it's bullshit from her boyfriend.  Then she'll make excuses that he just "loves women."

[JAYJAY1979]

I loved bethanny's utter annoyance at heather calling her mama...'im not her mama' lol

[PB Princess]

From Beth's blog today

"It has been a long time coming, and as I wrote in A Place of Yes, I don’t wear my story."

Bitch please.  Is there anyone who doesn't know "her story",  I'm an orphan, I was raised by wolves and on and on, this started on Season 1 of The Ho's of NYC.

[georgekush]

This season isn't really working. I thought at first it would when it first began but something is just off. I've actually felt this way about the show since last season.

I think it may be the cast? Ambitious with 8 women, and I don't even think the big cast is the problem..it's the characters they have chosen to be apart of it. I say fire Heather, Kristen and Dorinda. I think Ramona, Sonja, Luann, Bethenny and Carole would have been a tight, interesting cast.

[izabella]

I know it wasn't connected to anything else, but that footage of Sonja working out in her bathroom instantly became one of my all-time favorite Housewives moments. Even if nobody had been showing her shoes. Just being in the bathroom. The things that go on inside Sonja's house never disappoint. If it weren't for this show giving her life some structure, she could easily go full Grey Gardens in no time at all.

 

If only those interns of hers get together and write the inside story. 

 

How come none of them have popped up in the tabloids to explain how they are interns of Sonja's?   I still do not understand how she has this houseful of people, what they do, and why they bother to do it.

[missy jo]

I've worked in boxing, and I'm from Miami, so this episode rocked (except for Bethenny).

 

So Carole says she's friends with the trainer, so she invited the girls to the fight. However, it was Kristen's husband's company that was sponsoring the fighter (logo on trainer's sleeve and boxer's robe).

 

Either producer shenanigans or Carole made the introductions. I find that just as easy to believe, because boxers always need sponsors, and Josh probably jumped on that as soon as he found out they'd be filming. I was glad to see that Kristen ended up enjoying it! She wasn't even into the Tough Mudder that her husband sponsored and participated in.

 

Also, Art Basel is a huge deal, so congrats to Victoria, and I can see why LuAnn is so proud.

 

ETA: scoobiedoobs and WireWrap, I saw your posts about Josh's company; I'm just curious about which came first, the chicken or the egg in this scenario, since I don't usually read outside content.

Edited May 20, 2015 by missy jo

[phoenix780]

I don't think Bethenney wears her story.  To me, that's more like those people who go on a reality show and all they do is talk about how they're a single mother, or that their parents didn't approve of their choice of career; etc., until it becomes their entire identity, or their entire purpose is to overcome the characteristic they've fixated on.  That's not what I see Bethenney doing, even if it was an unnecessarily large part of the episode.  She's almost the reverse, imho.  

 

And with respect to Ramona's comment about Dorinda's boyfriend- when I first heard it, I thought she was suggesting he's with her to get access to that apartment, not that he's unworthy because he's not from that zip code.  It's still a dig about the neighborhood- it's not as classy or desirable, but he was gross because of his weight, not his homebase, is how I interpreted it.  

 

So she was still awful, just in a slightly different way...which I suppose means I'm splitting hairs, though I don't know why I am.

Edited May 20, 2015 by phoenix780

[AnnA]

 

I believe most waiters are told  by the owner/manager what to mention to their customers. IMO  Bethy was just rude.  When I don't want to hear the specials or have the menu explained to me I politely say no, thank you.

 

Yes, they're supposed to tell customers about the specials.  That wasn't what he was doing though.   I don't think she was terribly rude but she did cut him off.  I don't consider myself rude but I would have stopped him from explaining that the appetizers are listed under the Appetizer Section, etc., etc. and finishing up with the fact that the desserts are on the last page in the "Desert Section." 

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

From Beth's blog today

"It has been a long time coming, and as I wrote in A Place of Yes, I don’t wear my story."

Bitch please.  Is there anyone who doesn't know "her story",  I'm an orphan, I was raised by wolves and on and on, this started on Season 1 of The Ho's of NYC.

Right ON, (mama) ! :-)

[Bronzedog]

If Bethenny is concerned about how she came off in this episode, maybe should hire Sonja. Sonja is a PR person.

[WireWrap]

I've worked in boxing, and I'm from Miami, so this episode rocked (except for Bethenny).

 

So Carole says she's friends with the trainer, so she invited the girls to the fight. However, it was Kristen's husband's company that was sponsoring the fighter (logo on trainer's sleeve and boxer's robe).

 

Either producer shenanigans or Carole made the introductions. I find that just as easy to believe, because boxers always need sponsors, and Josh probably jumped on that as soon as he found out they'd be filming. I was glad to see that Kristen ended up enjoying it! She wasn't even into the Tough Mudder that her husband sponsored and participated in.

 

Also, Art Basel is a huge deal, so congrats to Victoria, and I can see why LuAnn is so proud.

 

ETA: scoobiedoobs and WireWrap, I saw your posts about Josh's company; I'm just curious about which came first, the chicken or the egg in this scenario, since I don't usually read outside content.

I believe Carole introduced them.

[HumblePi]

I don't like anyone, they're all caught either glancing at the camera (I caught Sonja and Luann twice) or they're trying very hard to stir the pot in order to force some drama. I never like Bethenny and that's why I didn't watch this in the past when Bethenny was a cast member. But I have to say that out of all of them, she at least makes me laugh.

 

I understand where her personality comes from after learning more about her childhood. To say that she came from a dysfunctional family would be a vast understatement. The stepfather she got together with in this episode is a old man and wants to try to undo the wrongs of his past. He was a gambler, alcoholic, womanizer and wife beater. She was estranged from him for very good reason. The marriage between John Parisella and her mother Bernadette was a toxic one. She and her mother absolutely hate each other.

 

Bethenny compensates for her deep unhappiness with humor, and I appreciate that she does. I especially liked what she said to the waiter at the MO-mar restaurant in Miami.

Waiter: "Let me walk you through our menu. On the first page we have all our food items, following that we have our signature cocktails."

Bethenny: "so it's like any other menu, I read what's on it, I order and it comes

alright I'm familiar with how this process works, I'll have a club soda."

 

Her friend comes and sits and at first I thought it was Dorinda in disguise with a brown wig. She looked and sounded just like Dorinda. Overall the episode was very uninteresting and I don't really like any of these women.

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

I hate boxing it disturbs me and the ladies looked out of place and it sucked. I ff through the whole thing.

 

Victoria's got  a deep voice like "mama" (tm Heather)! That didn't fall far from the tree.... I am going to catch hell for this but she looked kind of, dirty. Of the unshowered sort.

 

I watched Carole's writing scene only for the view of the renovated kitchen, and the real estate porn. Think Adam was schtupping Nicole? What happens in Nicaragua stays in Nicaragua! I could play Carole replying "whaTTT" to Luann's "Sonja young" comment on a loop for days. Good one Countess!

 

Were Dorinda, Heather & Kristin in this ep? BO-ring.

 

And that clown thing sucked.

 

Upthread someone mentioned Bethenny being miffed because Kelly pretended she didn't know her, when in fact they had met several times previously according to Bethenny.  I didn't think of mentioning it, but a few eps back when Bethenny said (re: not inviting Kristin) she didn't know Kristen's husband she's only met him like 5x in ten years or something. I believe Josh and Bethenny have a work connection. The Herman Munster shoe is on the other foot Beth.

 

This is what I thought of when I saw Bethenny's friend Teri: Karen Walker w/the long wig in the disco with the blue dress & shoulder pads!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJuaRa7vZNU

[HumblePi]

Heather will NEVER go into Sonja's home again.  She will NEVER be friends with Luann again.  In the words of Bethenny, do you really think I care?  Heather seems to think that people should be devestated if she decides that she doesn't like them.  Her little annoucements about burning bridges is so self-important.  Get over yourself, mama.  You ain't shit.

In reality TV shows like RHoNY, the word 'never' only means, until the next party, luncheon, fortune teller reading or private massage is there. Then Heather will go in again and forget all about her indignation at being left out in the rain and all will instantly be forgotten.

Edited May 21, 2015 by HumblePi

[Alonzo Mosely FBI]

And I am still overthinking the meeting between Bethenny and her stepfather.....

 

I think Bethenny is a lying liar who lies and bends the truth to suit her brand. HOWEVER, I was soft on her when her stepfather told her he was sorry, that he was proud of her, and he has a love for her that has lasted. I swear to god the girl softened. She needs to hear more of that.

 

She also needs a governor. She never has anyone in her life to rate her speed, or checks and balances, no family, no roots to check herself before she wrecks herself. I give John props for telling her like it is, that it's not healthy to drag this out anymore (publicly on TV-my words). I am damn sure he was hurt she threw him under the boss in seasons 1 and beyond without the context we have now- that they did the best they could as parents- that there was good and bad.

 

Remember also she was Bethenny Parisella @ Pinecrest and she changed her name back to Frankel. Dammit why wasn't that discussed. Their last face to face definitely sounded heated and was probably the reason why she changed her name. It sounds like a standoff from that point.

 

I wonder what his recommendation was on meeting up w/the Mom. Mom did call Bethenny the day Brynn was born and Bethenny never reached out in return. I think the Mom stuff got edited a bit. It was a little choppy when he said she never wanted children in the first place. I will say this, as a teen, young woman, middle aged women with a past history of husbands/boyfriends - I am damn sure Bethenny has more than once peed on a stick (off camera) and prayed for a negative pregnancy test. Who hasn't been there?

 

Just because you never wanted children, does not rule out that when the baby comes you love that child with more than words can explain. I suspect that convo got chopped so we didn't hear him say that part! Only the shocking line.

 

I liked John, no nonsense, a hard working, imperfect man who loved Bethenny and still does. I liked that he called her Beth. I had to get a look at his shoes toward the end of the scene to totally assess things lol

 

I am not wearing my story & divorce is 10X worse than her childhood,  shows TOTAL lack of self awareness. For F***s sake Bethenny!

 

And Teri summed it up I think best, she knows John, she knows Beth for decades. She summed it up as John had a bad temper, she (Bernadette) made him crazy but he loved you like a father loves a daughter. That's it Bethenny, now take that to a good therapist and get well! :-)

 

I still think she'll get her mother on camera when the time is. just. right. The stepfather might have been for ratings to test how America likes "Bethenny Starting Over".

Edited May 21, 2015 by Alonzo Mosely FBI

[Celia Rubenstein]

I don't think Bethenney wears her story.  To me, that's more like those people who go on a reality show and all they do is talk about how they're a single mother, or that their parents didn't approve of their choice of career; etc., until it becomes their entire identity, or their entire purpose is to overcome the characteristic they've fixated on.  That's not what I see Bethenney doing, even if it was an unnecessarily large part of the episode.  She's almost the reverse, imho.  

 

I think Bravo is wearing Bethenny's story.   I personally would rather see her in action in the business world and I sense Bethenny would be happy to focus on that part of her life, but Bravo seem to think her childhood traumas make better TV.  They are the ones whittling down her whole story to her upbringing.  

 

I especially liked what she said to the waiter at the MO-mar restaurant in Miami.

Waiter: "Let me walk you through our menu. On the first page we have all our food items, following that we have our signature cocktails."

Bethenny: "so it's like any other menu, I read what's on it, I order and it comes

alright I'm familiar with how this process works, I'll have a club soda."

 

Yeah, the fact that the waiter was genuinely laughing makes the exchange not rude to me.  As a Miami waiter he is probably quite used to dealing with New Yorkers (Florida is filled with them). He knows when a New Yorker is being an asshole, and I don't think her style of humor offended him in the slightest. 

Edited May 21, 2015 by Celia Rubenstein

[Beden]

 

OK, fine & dandy -- not a difficult concept to comprehend, that creative people produce differently.  But taking 4 or 5 years to produce one piece of so-so work ain't good, no matter how you cut it.

I've never bought the idea that creative people who depend on their work for a living exist on a different planet than the rest of the world. Professional is professional. I spent 30+ years making my living in professional theater and a deadline was a deadline. Opening night was opening night and no excuse was acceptable. i was a designer--my work involved other people, schedules, timetables, crews being hired (and paid for), rehearsals starting on time. If I hadn't had my act together I'd have been replaced. Period; the quality of my work may have been missed but my not toeing the line wouldn't have been. It's called show business for a reason--it's a business with real money and careers on the line and the same goes for publishing.

 

Friends who are fine artists know that their paintings or sculptures have to be delivered on time to a gallery, ready to be hung in time for a show opening. If they're hired to paint or draw an illustration for a book or magazine or newspaper it has to be in by deadline or they lose the job.

 

Excuses don't fly long. If Carole wants to play, she's more than free to do so but may have to deal with the consequences of returning her money and her contract. She may have to deal with a lawsuit and there would be repercussions for her being unreliable. She's had success as a writer but that was then and this is now--business is business and money is money and if she chooses to place her TV gig first she's welcome to do so--but it's probably a mistake in the long run as far as her writing goes.

 

 

There are differences between being a creative writer and a content writer.  When I have to write specific content, I am assigned a topic, length and deadline (among other parameters).  Some assignments are a breeze; others are a grin & bear it and I do just buckle down and crank something out.  When I am composing a creative piece, it's my vision and my timeline.  For Carole, it's the latter with a deadline.

I hear what you're saying and I agree. You don't always love the job, it's not always a creative high and may be boring but if you take the job (whatever it may be), you agree to do it within whatever parameters are set regarding time frame, length, style and so on. You agreed to that and so you put your head down and do the job to the best of your ability--even if it's just to get the damn thing over with. Procrastinating and making excuses are highschool, not one would hope from someone with experience, major prizes and a best seller under their belt. Carole may not need the money but she signed the contract of her own free will.

[raiderred1]

 

What bugs me about Carole's scenes this year about her writing is her faked carefree attitude about missing deadlines etc.  She knows how it works.  She signed the contract.  I think it's all an act for the show.  Like she's decided that this would be her persona this season.  Suppose now that Aviva isn't around to criticize her, Carole is playing a scatter brained ditz.  Jessica Simpson meets Carrie Bradshaw.  It's inauthentic and boring to me.

 

 

I'm right there with ya Lola

[Otherkate]

Yes, they're supposed to tell customers about the specials.  That wasn't what he was doing though.   I don't think she was terribly rude but she did cut him off.  I don't consider myself rude but I would have stopped him from explaining that the appetizers are listed under the Appetizer Section, etc., etc. and finishing up with the fact that the desserts are on the last page in the "Desert Section." 

 

I thought it was pretty funny and he seemed to think so too. I'm sure he's smart enough to realize that this little speech he's required to deliver is ridiculous.

[ryebread]

You don't always love the job, it's not always a creative high and may be boring but if you take the job (whatever it may be), you agree to do it within whatever parameters are set regarding time frame, length, style and so on. You agreed to that and so you put your head down and do the job to the best of your ability--even if it's just to get the damn thing over with.

 

Maybe Carole should pretend she's writing a long email.

[lunastartron]

Something I just remembered that makes Kristen's remarks about Bethenny even more face-palmy, irrespective of whether they were in response to a producer question or not: last season, she had a live-in nanny.

 

Um . . . no wonder she doesn't have trouble making arrangements for the care of her children.

[ScoobieDoobs]

The things that go on inside Sonja's house never disappoint. If it weren't for this show giving her life some structure, she could easily go full Grey Gardens in no time at all.

 

Well, as I've said many times in other threads for previous eps, I pass by Sonja's townhouse everyday on my way to work.  Hey, look, I don't ever give that joint more than a quick passing glance, as I always walk quickly by, because to do anything else would be just too weird for me.  And I'm a big believer in respecting people's privacy.  

 

BUT I'm always thinking when I do quickly glance at Sonja's townhouse, that at some point I'm gonna see something really funky going on outside of the place.  Er, like bras/pantyhose/underwear hanging outside the now always wide-open windows.  Haven't seen that yet, but I'll report back here if & when I do . . .

Edited May 21, 2015 by ScoobieDoobs

[Mozelle]

Here is the link..... https://pbs.twimg.com/media/CFeDBk_WIAAI42r.jpg:large

 

Ooooo. That's a cute cut!