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Small Talk: The Prayer Closet


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On 11/20/2020 at 10:22 AM, doodlebug said:

In my Catholic high school, there was an elderly nun who used to walk up and down the hallway pointing with a ruler and ordering girls to 'Kneel!' if she thought their skirts were too short.  The rule was our skirt had to skim the floor when we kneeled.  She'd let us get up right away though.  She had kinda bad eyesight though, so we got very skilled at rolling up our skirts at the waistband to make them short enough, and, when Sister Modesty ordered us to kneel, we could bring the skirt down to regulation length with a quick flick of the wrist.

Me.. and my 3 brothers went to Catholic school (for grades 1-8).  My brother (a year younger than me ) was a classic (now we can see) class clown, bored with school basically.  The nuns loved to harass him.  The principal nun.. brought he and another girl in his class (who also was a class clown) and PADDLED them on their butts.  My mother couldn't get down there fast enough.. she was on fire pissed. and told them if they ever touched another kid she would be in court.  (I am not fond of my mother, but good for her).. Oh and there was a priest (true story).. but he is dead and my brother is ok.. thank god.

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2 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

Pretty kitties!

 I just found a new (well, judging from the Mom jeans and perms it’s new only to me) series on Amazon Prime Video called “Dogs With Jobs.” If you’re a dog lover, this is for you...these animals (and often their owners) are AMAZING. It’s funny...my older dog, who is part Border Collie and thus extremely visual, ignores the whole thing.

My Golden retriever, OTOH, who usually doesn’t care much for other dogs, is FASCINATED by the show. He will occasionally go over to the television and get up on his back legs trying to see better. Which offends my other dog, who knows this is BADDOGAGAINSTRULESBADDOG behavior, so he grumps down off the couch and drags the offender down again. We call him The Enforcer.

This is big-time entertainment in our world these days. 
 

We’re a simple people.

How do you find that stuff?  I am screaming laughing.  I don't have a dog but would love to check that out.  Took me 8 months to finish Shameless.. thank god for the pandemic, right?  My friends all laugh but now i'm ready for some new Netflix and whatever else.

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The stories about losing pets are breaking my heart, but I want to add something about having pets euthanized.  I think that even if there are treatments that could prolong their lives that it may not be worth it.  If it's not something that can actually cure and return them to health, they may just have their suffering prolonged without understanding why it's happening.  People can choose to endure treatments that keep them going, but animals can't make that decision for themselves and probably just think they are being tortured.

 

On a happier note, this is one of my new babies this year. Freya.

IMG_2096.JPG.fb3f1abb2b249276ed5860d75d7bb58f.JPG

Edited by Suzn
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Lookeyloo, I just saw your post. I’m still thinking of you and your family.  Prayers for you all. Grieving is difficult, but during covid times......

Brookside when I mentioned getting my mail put on my office porch, I didn’t explain. I would have our paralegal place it in a bag and set it on the porch while I’m watching, then pick it up immediately. I didn’t make that clear.
 

Great news! Last week was an all time low when I spotted 5 employees in a certain grocery store with no masks, (yes, I confronted 2 of them and reported to corporate office) however, yesterday I found 2 places in Raleigh where EVERY employee AND every customer was wearing their mask correctly! I’m so relieved. I’ll be driving out of my way to shop at those two places. Plus, I got to use the $50.00 gift card that just realized I had in my wallet.  I had forgotten about it. 

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Good News Friday ~ Because of the holiday & the fact that my campus is closed the day after Thanksgiving I'm off until the 30th. Plus, we trade Columbus Day and Veteran's Day for the day after Thanksgiving and Christmas Eve and Christmas comes on a Friday, which I don't work so I'm "not working" on that morning so I can claim Christmas as a paid holiday, I only have to take one vacation day to get 9 days off. 

 

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Good for him.

 

Good News Sunday.... I'm making today Thanksgiving, because I can.  The turkey is here, the husband is off (which he won't be on Thursday) and I don't even care about the supposed purpose of the holiday.  It's a nice, cozy, family of 2 meal and a good night snuggled up out of the sudden snow.

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On 11/21/2020 at 10:17 AM, rue721 said:

I did well on the LSAT

Wait, @rue721, did I miss a post or are you just being modest? Weren’t you waiting for your results just recently? AND you took the CPA exam, pretty much back to back??? You are some kind of superstar, you...

 I went back to school twice after undergrad. First time in my late twenties for an MBA after working as an editor for my first career and the second time in my forties to become a veterinary technician after I mightily burned out on the horror show that was the software business...at least at the vicious snakepit of a company I worked for.

The second time at age 46 I was surrounded by twenty-somethings. I believe I was what they called a “non traditional student.”  🙄 I lucked out big time because there was another woman my age in the program who was a burned-out chemical engineer and twice as smart as I ever was. We became lab partners and she saved my butt more than once. That two-year program was run by a misogynist disgraced former veterinarian who apparently wanted students to fail...38 of us started, 11 of us graduated. It was brutal but I never regretted doing it. Well, maybe during finals weeks...

Okay, I’m meandering. Point is, you’ll meet all kinds in any program, and that’s a big part of the appeal, really. It’s easy to get in a bit of a life rut and it was great for me to meet so many diverse people. You might love it, too.

Congratulations on your LSAT scores!

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Good news Sunday!!  I got a new-to-me car.  It’s not  a miracle car or anything. In fact it’s a midsize SUV so I can haul the Butterbean camper if I want to.  Its not fancy, but it’s seeet, rides like a dream and makes me smile.  Plus:  it’s RED!!

ETA:  I’ve been driving my old car for nearly 11 years.  I know that car like I know my house shoes.  Not only am I relearning how to use a backup camera (mine died about 5 years ago, along with the backup lights.  Backup lights are THE BOMB!!!)  I get in the car every time looking for a place to put a key - which I don’t have.  Technology gives me a headache.  Every time I go somewhere I have this moment when I just sit in the drivers seat thinking “uhmmmmmm, what now??”

Edited by Happyfatchick
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I’ll encourage you all to be very savvy with upcoming contacts. I just received word of someone NEW in my extended family who is positive....closer contacts trying to get tested....I’m extremely worried over my special needs niece.  I’m staying away from my parents til more are tested.  It seems to stem from a child’s large birthday birthday last week! There are no words for the morons that allowed this. Also, in my parents community..SIX covid deaths within 2 days in a local nursing home!  I heard CDC is recommending limiting Thanksgiving gathering to your own household. It’s prudent. Please consider. 

 

 

 

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Re: fostering cats

I used to be a shelter director, and I fostered close to 90 cats and kittens. 
 

From the shelter’s perspective, we liked it when people fostered and continued to foster. If they decided to adopt, then that was one less foster home. Cats with pictures of them in homes and with useful details like lap cat, sleeps on the bed, gets along well with my grandchildren, whatever it was, helped enormously in getting the cat adopted faster. 
 

However, if you do foster, make sure the organization doesn’t expect you to foster the cat until it is adopted (unless that is what you want). Sometimes organizations get overwhelmed or are just disorganized. I rarely had a cat cage empty, so if someone called and said they needed to bring that cat back ASAP (usually poor planning by the foster forgetting they were going out of town), that would be a problem, but a few day’s notice was not a problem.

I preferred to foster bottle babies, and then I would pass them off to another foster home to wean.

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On 11/21/2020 at 6:13 PM, lookeyloo said:

Hello everyone.  I've been reading sporadically and want to thank everyone for your support and kind words during this awful time.  It is so unnatural to help a child die.  His husband, our dear son in law, lost his "everything person" and we are helping him emotionally. Actually it gives us a purpose.  His family is useless.  they are missing out on a wonderful human being.  Grief counseling is in the works, but, since COVID, nothing moves quickly or in person.  We know we have to live every day with it, not sleep through it, and experience it.  We are all talking a lot, spending time together, crying together, and trying not to "what if" everything.  It is hard to do much lately except keep ourselves going.  Sweet son told me I had to be okay, so I will work on that.  We all know we did all we could, the doctors and treatment were correct, but the cancer was bad and already Stage 4 when diagnosed.  We knew from the beginning there was no cure or remission in the future, just "manage".  I called it our "uncertain future".

@Crazycatlady - we have also walked your walk more than once. We have learned that once they are so bad off, as much money as we spent, and as many vet visits we had, it was really better for them to let them go.  Hard to explain all the misery to them.  It is so hard, but, also a loving thing to do for your beloved cat.  

So glad to hear from you, and so glad that you have such a wonderful relationship with your son-in-law. I'm sure that it makes the whole situation at least a bit more bearable for the both of you, being able to share that way. I want to give both of you the biggest hug ever, just reading this. For whatever tiny bit of comfort it might give, ❤️

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My good news Sunday: 
We just survived a nine day emergency whole house repipe (downstairs pipes 96 years old). Workers all over the house, all doors and windows open, fans on all over the house. And all of us wore masks all day long and tried to stay out of each other’s way. We haven’t even had one relative or friend in our house since last March. It is like a miracle having our house back to ourselves.

 

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@lookeyloo, thanks for checking in. I'm so glad you are there for your son-in-law. I hope you stay safe and wish you comfort as you deal with the awful loss of your dear son. 

I've def got pandemic fatigue but it's not manifesting as engaging in high-risk behavior. To the contrary, I'm feeling a kind of fear that is a first for me since all this started so many months ago. It's hard to find the words but it's a sharp personal anxiety that just feels different than the concern I felt before. Our state did pretty well coming out of the first wave of the spring and early summer; IIRC our hospitals didn't get overwhelmed and a big emergency overflow hospital setup in the convention center was barely used, if used at all, and I think has been mostly if not entirely dismantled. But we're well into a new wave, like most of the country. Hospitalized COVID numbers are up. IMO you can argue about what the case numbers mean for positive tests, but it's hard to argue with the numbers of people so sick they have to be hospitalized. 

I'll be here in my condo on Thanksgiving. Some of my local family are gathering at a home, but really it's only about half of them. Two households have opted out, in addition to me. I'm trying not to worry about the ones who are combining households for Turkey Day, but there's risk in terms of where a few of them have been (college, on site jobs, and heaven knows what other stuff some of them have done). That bunch includes a few who have seemed receptive to those bullsh*t conspiracy theories during this pandemic, like "it's a hoax" and "if you wear a mask you are poisoning yourself with your own expelled breaths." And these are adults with college degrees. *facepalm* 

I love the internet. I was able to find a site to easily create a six-month calendar starting with this month, that I could print out on a letter sized sheet of paper. I have it up in my home office, and I'm marking off the days. It helps me remember that both this winter and this pandemic have a limited number of days to go. More days than I would like, but not infinite. My deepest hope is to survive these coming three or four months in good health. I'm feeling humble about it. As in, I don't necessarily DESERVE continuing good health any more than anyone else on this planet, and I will be so grateful if I am still standing - literally - next April Fool's Day. It's my hope for all of us.

Be safe, folks.

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The site is okay for me today so far, but I couldn't get in for several hours last night. It seems the glitches are way up this past month or so. Like my friend likes to state whenever anything goes wrong, "that's 2020 for you", lol. 

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@lookeyloo, sending healing and warm energy your way.

Similar to @Jeeves, I'm loosely following a calendar in my head. Just setting mini 'get-through-until' goals to break up the long dark winter into smaller sections. My first get-through-until date is 12/14 followed by 12/25, then 1/20, then my birthday a few days later. Then the regular, on the calendar holidays, including President's Day, Valentine's Day and St Patrick's Day.

I'm hoping for those of you experiencing covid fatigue, you too find ways to make it less miserable and tiresome.

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My Mom is getting stronger slowly but surely, taking care of both her and my sister is still A LOT. Small goals my Mom can put on her own pants! But I think my sister was yearning for some attention because on Saturday evening she sat down and grabbed my feet and held them for about 30 min (she has loved to hold my feet since she was a baby, she would crawl under my toddler table and grab them). 

Next week I have a few days off which will be nice, I still have to take my Mom to PT but I will be able to sleep in, decorate my house for the holidays, and my Mom's house, and the exterior. I have been keeping up with my exercise at least 30min daily. On Saturday I planked for the first time in a decade- sweet baby Jesus have mercy on me. Today will be a lunch time workout before I take Mom to PT. I also am very excited for Thanksgiving dinner, Strawberry Cheesecake Factory Cheesecake is 44 points and the Oreo is 88 points, GUESS which one I will be having??

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@lookeyloo Thank you for checking in, we've all been thinking of you. I'm glad that you and your son-in-law can be there for each other, he sounds lovely and so does your relationship

17 hours ago, Oldernowiser said:

Wait, @rue721, did I miss a post or are you just being modest? Weren’t you waiting for your results just recently? AND you took the CPA exam, pretty much back to back??? You are some kind of superstar, you...

Thanks, that makes me feel really good 🥰 I got a 170 on the LSAT, which was my goal score and is going to really help my application. VERY happy about that, because even though I'm more focused on the CPA exams right now, in the long term, getting a good score on the LSAT was arguably more important. 

But still -- my good news is that I learned today that I passed my first CPA exam section! I took my first section in September, and failed by a hair (retaking that one in a couple weeks), so this is the second section that I've taken -- but the first to pass. I feel fantastic, because now that I've passed one, I feel like maybe I CAN pass them all 😁 Cannot tell you how excited, relieved and proud I am! There are four sections, and with my retake, I'm still hoping to pass three by the end of the year.

My other piece of good news is that my boyfriend and I introduced my dog to his cats yesterday -- and it went well! The cats were actually very brave, much more comfortable than expected. My dog was anxious because she was totally confused by us hanging out all day in this new house with her favorite blankie on the couch and her bowl in the kitchen...I think that she was terrified that we'd very suddenly moved. She slept in a big lump under the covers in bed last night, poor dear. But she liked the cats, it was just the terror that a huge life change might have been sprung on her that she had an issue with!

Edited by rue721
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1 hour ago, Jeeves said:

@rue721 - yay for you! Three big yays - the CPA exam, the LSAT, and the furkids. It's nice to read good news!

Actually I have a bit of good news. A few months ago I decided to pay out of pocket to see a local MD who is IMO much more savvy about nutrition/weight issues than my otherwise fine HMO. I've been carrying a lot of extra weight for quite awhile, despite eating sensibly (well, with a dive into comfort eating during COVID springtime at home). I'm glad I did; he ordered some lab tests I'd never have argued my HMO into, and gave me advice based on the results. 

I've followed his advice, and have lost some weight in the last couple of months. Watching what I eat and also when I eat. I'm fine, not feeling starved or deprived. It's going slowly, and I'm figuring out what works and what doesn't. At this time I'm wearing a size smaller jeans than I've been able to wear for a year, and my new batch of fall/winter sweatshirts is a size smaller than last year's. (The older ones are in the donation bag.) I decided, despite COVID, to keep my follow-up office visit appointment with him last week. I wanted to see how close my home scale's weight is to his office scale (good news, it's very close), and just check in generally. My bloodwork result numbers are holding steady and they are good. I still have a lot of weight to lose. I've decided that I will work on this and I hope to be many pounds lighter by the end of this winter.

Good for you @Jeeves! Slow weight loss is actually best- health wise and for keeping weight off long term, but the slow steady weight loss isn't as sexy or exciting. I am rooting for you. I am in the same boat. I am on track to lose my 15lbs by the end of the year (from when I started would be an average of 1.5lbs a week), for ME (not telling anyone else that to do) setting small goals every 10 or 12 weeks is nice, long enough to see progress, but not so long it feels imaginary. 

I did not gain weight during quarantine but I am a natural couch potato in non covid times, and WFH life has just encouraged me not to move at all. This is not good.

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2 hours ago, rue721 said:

@lookeyloo Thank you for checking in, we've all been thinking of you. I'm glad that you and your son-in-law can be there for each other, he sounds lovely and so does your relationship

Thanks, that makes me feel really good 🥰 I got a 170 on the LSAT, which was my goal score and is going to really help my application. VERY happy about that, because even though I'm more focused on the CPA exams right now, in the long term, getting a good score on the LSAT was arguably more important. 

But still -- my good news is that I learned today that I passed my first CPA exam section! I took my first section in September, and failed by a hair (retaking that one in a couple weeks), so this is the second section that I've taken -- but the first to pass. I feel fantastic, because now that I've passed one, I feel like maybe I CAN pass them all 😁 Cannot tell you how excited, relieved and proud I am! There are four sections, and with my retake, I'm still hoping to pass three by the end of the year.

My other piece of good news is that my boyfriend and I introduced my dog to his cats yesterday -- and it went well! The cats were actually very brave, much more comfortable than expected. My dog was anxious because she was totally confused by us hanging out all day in this new house with her favorite blankie on the couch and her bowl in the kitchen...I think that she was terrified that we'd very suddenly moved. She slept in a big lump under the covers in bed last night, poor dear. But she liked the cats, it was just the terror that a huge life change might have been sprung on her that she had an issue with!

LOOK AT YOU! You are amazing. Big hoorahs.

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I am having a surgical biopsy Wednesday (the in-office biopsy several weeks ago didn't get the cells needed), so I had my first COVID test this morning. My son had to have one last week for his job, and he described it as having your nostrils swished with a teensy toilet brush. Not a bad description...
In an effort to avoid people except for Mr. Turquoise this weekend, I holed up in the house except to walk the dog. I used the time to put up my Christmas decorations and wrap the gifts I have. I am so enjoying the festive atmosphere and lights! Just what I needed.

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I kept meaning to share this with my fellow Illinosians here..and now today is the LAST DAY to sign up to get some of this class action money from Facebook!

I just successfully signed up online for both my husband and my Facebook accounts. 

 If you live in Illinois..do it NOW before it expires! (this is legit...Facebook got sued by Illinois for privacy invasions) It was on the news and in the Tribune today.

You *could* get a couple of hundred dollars if you qualify.

PS it depends on how many people sign up for it to see how much we might get..so I'm cutting into my profits for the benefit of my Illinois small talk friends😂

http://www.facebookbipaclassaction.com/

 Ps sorry, it's only for people who live in Illinois

Screenshot_20201123-194631.jpg

Edited by ChiCricket
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54 minutes ago, ChiCricket said:

I kept meaning to share this with my fellow Illinosians here..and now today is the LAST DAY to sign up to get some of this class action money from Facebook!

I just successfully signed up online for both my husband and my Facebook accounts. 

 If you live in Illinois..do it NOW before it expires! (this is legit...Facebook got sued by Illinois for privacy invasions) It was on the news and in the Tribune today.

You *could* get a couple of hundred dollars if you qualify.

PS it depends on how many people sign up for it to see how much we might get..so I'm cutting into my profits for the benefit of my Illinois small talk friends😂

http://www.facebookbipaclassaction.com/

 Ps sorry, it's only for people who live in Illinois

Screenshot_20201123-194631.jpg

Yes I signed up for mine. 

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I'm going to stay with my parents for awhile. This living situation is not sustainable. My boss is understanding. I have a few things to wrap up here before I can leave but I'm not coming back until the new year.

I need to drop off the keys with a co-worker. The management whom is normally easy to deal with has become an outright nightmare to deal with since March. Normally I would cut them slack because COVID and all that, but they haven't been checking empty units since March. It's being left up to fire departments and the police if there are issues. The last thing I need is my unit broken into by the fire department because someone heard a loud sound and having to rush back. 😒 

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@Jeeves, I pulled down your quote box and lost it.  Somewhere in cyber space are your comments about covid.   (That makes me laugh - that someone was texting in Japan and just got zapped with your post).  

I was trying to box your fears about covid.  I feel that.  I get that.  I’m sure there are eye rolls  with my compound stories - my bubble is pretty big.  But my SIL on the far side of the compound started calling about our plans - and I put her off and off and off - I mean our typical Thanksgiving is HUGE.  I always joke about how Thanksgiving means we dress a little better to eat with the same people we ate with yesterday.  I just have this quaking fear because the bro and SIL also have 2 grown married sons who would be there and... God only knows what they do, or who they see, or what cooties they may drag in - and OMG I HAAAAAAAAAATE to be this way.  [Side note: one is a tattoo artist and one is a professional alcoholic who does electrical work on the side.  Mean but true].  First we thought we might actually go to the river, fry a turkey (like the pilgrims did, you know), make grilled corn (which they may HAVE done) and skewered veggies - I was all over that.  Let the cooties into the atmosphere.  But the SIL said her kids wouldn’t go for that.  (I think they might have).  Then we decided to move the tractor out and set up tables in the red barn.  But.  Today I had to make the call and say no, I just can’t.  

I feel almost like this covid monster has grown legs and is walking around looking for someone to eat.  I mean - I guess it’s all in my head, but I’m thinking how many of us are left? Like it’s a zombie and has a life of its own.  I haven’t really been “scared” of it at all... until right now.  Honestly, it’s almost accidental I have such good covid practices - I work at home and text my grands all day.  We yell back and forth across the acres.  I just don’t have to go anywhere much.  Now.  I’m actually scared.  Like @Jeeves I just have this creepy crawly icky feeling.  Kind of that impending doom thing.  Isn’t that weird when we can actually see the light at the end of the tunnel?  What IZZZZZZZ this yuck I’m feeling??  Yiu described it exactly with “deep personal anxiety”.  Yes.

 @rue721 GO YOUUUUU!!!

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20 minutes ago, Oldernowiser said:

@PikaScrewChu, sending a hug. I assume living with your parents isn’t ideal (well, for me it would have been a total freaking nightmare, but I shouldn’t assume anything) but sometimes anything that carves out a tiny bit of space to regroup can be really helpful.

Wishing you well, sweetie.

Oh boy... My sister is wilting from living with them for so long since it was only supposed to be for a few months. We could in theory trade places but her pets would flip out in a small apartment. I don't mind giving her a reprieve for a bit.

It's for the best for right now. It's a quiet neighborhood, although crime has gone up exponentially in the past 8 months, so I will have to be more cautious than usual. I'm just excited to have a yard and do all the holidays. I don't care about stores or any of that nonsense. I just need the space to dance and feel free again. 

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@rue721, wow, talk about making the most of this Covid time! You are the queen! Congrats on the progress toward your CPA and LSAT.

How wonderful that the fur babies are getting along!

@Jeeves and @Scarlett45, great news about your weight loss and healthy progress. You should feel so good about your efforts.

@Turquoise, good luck with the biopsy results. Glad you got to enjoy putting up the holiday decorations!

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4 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

I kept meaning to share this with my fellow Illinosians here..and now today is the LAST DAY to sign up to get some of this class action money from Facebook!

I just successfully signed up online for both my husband and my Facebook accounts. 

 If you live in Illinois..do it NOW before it expires! (this is legit...Facebook got sued by Illinois for privacy invasions) It was on the news and in the Tribune today.

You *could* get a couple of hundred dollars if you qualify.

PS it depends on how many people sign up for it to see how much we might get..so I'm cutting into my profits for the benefit of my Illinois small talk friends😂

http://www.facebookbipaclassaction.com/

 Ps sorry, it's only for people who live in Illinois

Screenshot_20201123-194631.jpg

Just now saw it, so I guess I just missed it. Oh well. 

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9 hours ago, Happyfatchick said:

@Jeeves, I pulled down your quote box and lost it.  Somewhere in cyber space are your comments about covid.   (That makes me laugh - that someone was texting in Japan and just got zapped with your post).  

I was trying to box your fears about covid.  I feel that.  I get that.  I’m sure there are eye rolls  with my compound stories - my bubble is pretty big.  But my SIL on the far side of the compound started calling about our plans - and I put her off and off and off - I mean our typical Thanksgiving is HUGE.  I always joke about how Thanksgiving means we dress a little better to eat with the same people we ate with yesterday.  I just have this quaking fear because the bro and SIL also have 2 grown married sons who would be there and... God only knows what they do, or who they see, or what cooties they may drag in - and OMG I HAAAAAAAAAATE to be this way.  [Side note: one is a tattoo artist and one is a professional alcoholic who does electrical work on the side.  Mean but true].  First we thought we might actually go to the river, fry a turkey (like the pilgrims did, you know), make grilled corn (which they may HAVE done) and skewered veggies - I was all over that.  Let the cooties into the atmosphere.  But the SIL said her kids wouldn’t go for that.  (I think they might have).  Then we decided to move the tractor out and set up tables in the red barn.  But.  Today I had to make the call and say no, I just can’t.  

I feel almost like this covid monster has grown legs and is walking around looking for someone to eat.  I mean - I guess it’s all in my head, but I’m thinking how many of us are left? Like it’s a zombie and has a life of its own.  I haven’t really been “scared” of it at all... until right now.  Honestly, it’s almost accidental I have such good covid practices - I work at home and text my grands all day.  We yell back and forth across the acres.  I just don’t have to go anywhere much.  Now.  I’m actually scared.  Like @Jeeves I just have this creepy crawly icky feeling.  Kind of that impending doom thing.  Isn’t that weird when we can actually see the light at the end of the tunnel?  What IZZZZZZZ this yuck I’m feeling??  Yiu described it exactly with “deep personal anxiety”.  Yes.

 @rue721 GO YOUUUUU!!!

Yes, this is a MONSTER..   I am going to be by myself this Thanksgiving.  My "family"  is my Aunt (who is like my mother that i should have had) and they live in New Hampshire.. only about a mile from me... they don't "mask" (she does, buy my cousins don't).  Not gonna take the risk sitting 6 inches from each other).  I miss my brothers and their kids; but i mostly miss my Dad (who lives in Maryland).  he's gonna be 85 in April and is HOPING to get back up here to see us all.  Have a HAPPY AND SAFE Thanksgiving everyone.  It sure isn't like it used to be

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For so many years (basically since my middle school/high school years) Thanksgiving was my Mom's holiday to take call (she gave up night call in 2019), so our traditions are pretty much the same, we are having Chinese Pot Stickers and Cheesecake Factory for dessert- I will put up my sister's christmas tree and decorations. It will be a good day.

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I told my parents that I couldn't be indoors with them from now on and wouldn't eat even outdoors with them until at least 2 weeks after the New Year, because people at my office are not being responsible and neither are people at my boyfriend's workplace. My parents have planned an outdoor Thanksgiving for just me and them and they really want to go through with it before we shut down all in-person communication, so I said OK, as long as we're outside the whole time and social distance. They're high risk and have been really careful, so they are sad but willing to go through with that. Well just now it turns out that a friend came over to my boyfriend's house on Saturday afternoon, and even though he and my boyfriend's roommate were the ones really hanging out for a long period, my boyfriend did join them for an hour or two. Indoors. Despite the friend also having to go to work every day, and in fact having just come from work. Then my boyfriend came over to my place for Saturday evening/night and I spent Sunday at his house. Well, now the friend just said that his boss tested positive. So now the friend is getting tested. He says his earliest exposure to his (positive) boss was a week ago, but apparently they also have worked together SINCE then. Of course I'm like, even if the friend tests negative now, the friend could have gotten the virus at one of the later exposures, and so isn't testable yet but nonetheless infectious. Shit. I told my parents and they still want to go through with the outdoor Thanksgiving. Of course I want to, but I'm scared that if I go through with it, I'll kill them! I hate all of this!! And of course my officemate is mocking me for being worried. He's preparing for his THREE in-person Thanksgiving celebrations, which are going to be just the same as always. EVERYONE in my office is having Thanksgiving with family, with people traveling in from out of town or who they're joining in another state, full celebrations with at least 10 people each. This is insanity. I have thought about quitting so many times over this and I keep white-knuckling through it because, financially, it's the only sensible thing to do. But this is so fucking scary, you guys.

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5 minutes ago, rue721 said:

I told my parents that I couldn't be indoors with them from now on and wouldn't eat even outdoors with them until at least 2 weeks after the New Year, because people at my office are not being responsible and neither are people at my boyfriend's workplace. My parents have planned an outdoor Thanksgiving for just me and them and they really want to go through with it before we shut down all in-person communication, so I said OK, as long as we're outside the whole time and social distance. They're high risk and have been really careful, so they are sad but willing to go through with that. Well just now it turns out that a friend came over to my boyfriend's house on Saturday afternoon, and even though he and my boyfriend's roommate were the ones really hanging out for a long period, my boyfriend did join them for an hour or two. Indoors. Despite the friend also having to go to work every day, and in fact having just come from work. Then my boyfriend came over to my place for Saturday evening/night and I spent Sunday at his house. Well, now the friend just said that his boss tested positive. So now the friend is getting tested. He says his earliest exposure to his (positive) boss was a week ago, but apparently they also have worked together SINCE then. Of course I'm like, even if the friend tests negative now, the friend could have gotten the virus at one of the later exposures, and so isn't testable yet but nonetheless infectious. Shit. I told my parents and they still want to go through with the outdoor Thanksgiving. Of course I want to, but I'm scared that if I go through with it, I'll kill them! I hate all of this!! And of course my officemate is mocking me for being worried. He's preparing for his THREE in-person Thanksgiving celebrations, which are going to be just the same as always. EVERYONE in my office is having Thanksgiving with family, with people traveling in from out of town or who they're joining in another state, full celebrations with at least 10 people each. This is insanity. I have thought about quitting so many times over this and I keep white-knuckling through it because, financially, it's the only sensible thing to do. But this is so fucking scary, you guys.

Oh wow. Just wow. I'm so, so sorry you're going through this. But you're right we are only as responsible with covid as the last person we encountered. You sound like such a loving and caring daughter. And kudos to your boyfriend for letting you know what's up with his encounters.

One more thing, is their any chance you could request a new office mate? Just one less thing for you to worry about? That person sounds very careless.

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4 minutes ago, rue721 said:

I told my parents that I couldn't be indoors with them from now on and wouldn't eat even outdoors with them until at least 2 weeks after the New Year, because people at my office are not being responsible and neither are people at my boyfriend's workplace. My parents have planned an outdoor Thanksgiving for just me and them and they really want to go through with it before we shut down all in-person communication, so I said OK, as long as we're outside the whole time and social distance. They're high risk and have been really careful, so they are sad but willing to go through with that. Well just now it turns out that a friend came over to my boyfriend's house on Saturday afternoon, and even though he and my boyfriend's roommate were the ones really hanging out for a long period, my boyfriend did join them for an hour or two. Indoors. Despite the friend also having to go to work every day, and in fact having just come from work. Then my boyfriend came over to my place for Saturday evening/night and I spent Sunday at his house. Well, now the friend just said that his boss tested positive. So now the friend is getting tested. He says his earliest exposure to his (positive) boss was a week ago, but apparently they also have worked together SINCE then. Of course I'm like, even if the friend tests negative now, the friend could have gotten the virus at one of the later exposures, and so isn't testable yet but nonetheless infectious. Shit. I told my parents and they still want to go through with the outdoor Thanksgiving. Of course I want to, but I'm scared that if I go through with it, I'll kill them! I hate all of this!! And of course my officemate is mocking me for being worried. He's preparing for his THREE in-person Thanksgiving celebrations, which are going to be just the same as always. EVERYONE in my office is having Thanksgiving with family, with people traveling in from out of town or who they're joining in another state, full celebrations with at least 10 people each. This is insanity. I have thought about quitting so many times over this and I keep white-knuckling through it because, financially, it's the only sensible thing to do. But this is so fucking scary, you guys.

I am so sorry for you right now.  I have been "white knuckling" it for 8 months.. and I was so bored.. I have had my friend/neighbor in my home... I honestly don't know what contact she has had.. we just had a few drinks the other night.. AND SHE DOUBLE MASKS.. and i always wear masks.. a day later i was like "what are you doing"?  I am kind of high risk.. I don't even know what to say.  this is a nightmare for me and so many others. 

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I think December is going to be scary with a huge rise in cases because people aren't following protocol and are still having normal Thanksgiving celebrations. I get it, I miss my family and wish we could have our usual large dinner, but it's just not worth it if someone ends up getting sick or dying because we wanted to have one meal together. I'm so grateful to be able to work from home and avoid idiots like the ones rue721 described. I just want to scream at people like that "you are the reason we're still in the middle of a damn pandemic and hundreds of thousands of people in our country alone have died, moron!!" I'm so ready for the vaccines to be available, just to start something positive (even if I know it will take months and months to see a difference).

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Just now, emma675 said:

I think December is going to be scary with a huge rise in cases because people aren't following protocol and are still having normal Thanksgiving celebrations. I get it, I miss my family and wish we could have our usual large dinner, but it's just not worth it if someone ends up getting sick or dying because we wanted to have one meal together. I'm so grateful to be able to work from home and avoid idiots like the ones rue721 described. I just want to scream at people like that "you are the reason we're still in the middle of a damn pandemic and hundreds of thousands of people in our country alone have died, moron!!" I'm so ready for the vaccines to be available, just to start something positive (even if I know it will take months and months to see a difference).

As much as I, as a single extrovert who has been a caregiver for many years through a genetic lottery (rather than a call toward caregiving), doesnt like this pandemic, I know being able to work from home, have most things delivered and have my sister here with us is a privilege. We are all safe, healthy and together. I have a lot to be thankful for.

 

 I also know we are lucky to have M working here (as much as I miss G sometimes, because she had such a great discipline over my sister who has not been behaving because she hates Mom's walker) G would not have been able to continue working during this pandemic. 

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31 minutes ago, rue721 said:

EVERYONE in my office is having Thanksgiving with family, with people traveling in from out of town or who they're joining in another state, full celebrations with at least 10 people each. This is insanity. I have thought about quitting so many times over this and I keep white-knuckling through it because, financially, it's the only sensible thing to do. But this is so fucking scary, you guys.

Oh, honey. I am so sorry...smack your office mate (and possibly your boyfriend) upside the head with something at least six feet long. Do you have an HR department or some equivalent you can file a complaint with? That jackass is going to get you sick...google asymptomatic carriers. He’s an asshole.

Your parents? I think you have to be honest with yourself as to how you’d feel if they got sick after your get together. It might not have even been you...but you would think it was. 

I keep reading stories about people being just butt stubborn about this...some idiot Mom in Georgia threw a homecoming party for 250 high school kids. What could go wrong? 🙄 It’s like all these deniers are suddenly toddlers and are throwing tantrums because they’ve been in timeout too long.

YOU STAY SAFE. And it’s time to have a long chat with your boyfriend*. An hour in an enclosed space is plenty of time to contract this thing.

*On the phone!

Edited by Oldernowiser
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