Small Talk: The Prayer Closet

[CherryMalotte]

Best wishes to you Mrs. P for your treatment!

 

[SunnyBeBe]

So, I just got an invitation for one of my niece's wedding!  I'll need a dress of course. Any suggestions would be welcomed. (I'm imagining light, flowing, and floral.) It's OUTSIDE and in August. (south), so, it'll be very hot. (At that time of year in this area, it'll likely be at least 100 degrees. I'm not kidding.)  I attended one like this before and it was brutal.  It's at 5;00 p.m.  and at one of those wooded farm wedding venues.  It's quite lovely, but, I'm not sure how the heat thing is going to play into this. Plus, the mosquitoes.  OMG....it's her day, so, I pray things go well.  And that time of year we get terrible thunder storms almost every evening. lol  Fingers crossed.  lol  I've been looking online.  If you know of any good sites, I'd like to check them out. 

[Mrs. P.]

4 hours ago, CherryMalotte said:

Best wishes to you Mrs. P for your treatment!

 

Thank you!

[Aja]

15 hours ago, Mrs. P. said:

I usually just lurk on PTV, but after reading Aja's story, I thought I'd jump in and share my experience.

i've always had regular mammograms and they've always been normal.  However, the mammo I had in September was not normal and by the middle of October I had been diagnosed with breast cancer. It was a small tumor but it was "triple negative", which means that it is very aggressive and tends to metastasize quickly.  So 15 days from the phone call giving me the diagnosis, I was sitting in a chemo chair. That was November 1.

I've had 11 chemo treatments so far and have 5 more to go. Then I will have surgery.   A lumpectomy is probably an option, since my tumor was small, but then I'd have to have 9 weeks of daily radiation. I'll likely opt for a mastectomy, because I don't want to have the radiation.

Bottom line - get your mammograms regularly aand faithfully.  My last one probably saved my life.

Holy WOW, MRS.P! Thank you so much for sharing this. I am so sorry you're going through all this, and I am SO glad you got your mammogram when you did. A friend of mine--younger than I am--is going through the exact same thing. She's an artist and did a really great piece for Wildfire, an online magazine. Have you seen Wildfire? It was a great place for me through my diagnosis and treatment (a link to my friend's article):

https://www.wildfirecommunity.org/hot-flashes/2018/11/28/clever-costumes-for-bald-people

I got super lucky with my diagnosis--SUPER lucky. I hadn't had a mammogram in probably two years (COMPLETELY irresponsible considering my family history.) I had zero symptoms, felt no lumps, nothing. I was in pissed-off-from-being-fired, zany-job-interview-montage mode.  But it was already in my lymph nodes. 

I'm so happy to hear about everyone going to get their mammograms! Yay, sisters!!! I was completely blown away by how friggin' COMMON it is. Once I was diagnosed, I got on the phone with my recruiter to tell her to call off the job search for now, and she said "Oh, I had it three years ago, you'll be fine, don't worry." I told my landlord (who is this young whippersnapper baby property mogul type dude) that I got this diagnosis and didn't know what was going to happen and he was like "Oh, my mom had it last year, you'll be fine." My very first day of radiation, I went into the waiting room and my neighbor's girlfriend was sitting there. "Oh hi! You too?" I live in Minneapolis, y'all, not Mayberry. But the good news is, I was also pretty blown away by what they are able to do these days with early detection.

Thank you so much for all your messages! I so look forward to getting back to normal, starting a new job that I can grow to both resent and become weirdly co-dependent about, and re-joining the Duggar eyeroll festivities here!

@MRS.P, thank you again for sharing, and I'm sending all the love and healing vibes to you!!!!

Edited March 12, 2019 by Aja

[galaxychaser]

@Mrs. P. @Aja be well and strong!

[Scarlett45]

1 hour ago, SunnyBeBe said:

So, I just got an invitation for one of my niece's wedding!  I'll need a dress of course. Any suggestions would be welcomed. (I'm imagining light, flowing, and floral.) It's OUTSIDE and in August. (south), so, it'll be very hot. (At that time of year in this area, it'll likely be at least 100 degrees. I'm not kidding.)  I attended one like this before and it was brutal.  It's at 5;00 p.m.  and at one of those wooded farm wedding venues.  It's quite lovely, but, I'm not sure how the heat thing is going to play into this. Plus, the mosquitoes.  OMG....it's her day, so, I pray things go well.  And that time of year we get terrible thunder storms almost every evening. lol  Fingers crossed.  lol  I've been looking online.  If you know of any good sites, I'd like to check them out. 

How much do you want to spend? And what size do you wear?

I love all things Nordstrom or Nordstrom rack. 

[SunnyBeBe]

11 minutes ago, Scarlett45 said:

How much do you want to spend? And what size do you wear?

I love all things Nordstrom or Nordstrom rack. 

Yeah, me too.  I've been looking around on line and even have a store nearby that I could go.  I'd like to spend under $200.00 and probably a size 14.  I hope to have lost weight by then, so, I may get a little smaller.  I may order down a little or wait longer before I order it.  I'm just trying to get an idea for now.  

I'd like this one, if the lining underneath the lace was a little longer.  It has to be thin and light due to the extreme heat we'll be in.

https://shop.nordstrom.com/s/dress-the-population-ally-3d-floral-mesh-cocktail-dress/5134253?origin=category-personalizedsort&breadcrumb=Home%2FWomen%2FClothing%2FDresses&color=dusty pink

I actually prefer prints and not solids, but, IDK.  

Edited March 12, 2019 by SunnyBeBe

[galaxychaser]

I’m in love with John Mulaney and Nick Kroll. 

Watch this for for a laugh 

[Scarlett45]

2 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

Yeah, me too.  I've been looking around on line and even have a store nearby that I could go.  I'd like to spend under $200.00 and probably a size 14.  I hope to have lost weight by then, so, I may get a little smaller.  I may order down a little or wait longer before I order it.  I'm just trying to get an idea for now.  

Nordstrom will have lots of “guest of wedding” options for you in the $150 dollar range. I would start searching NordstromRack.com now so if something gorgeous pops up you can grab it. 

[jjane]

Aja, I'm so happy things are looking up for you. Who knew losing your job in such a situation could be a lifesaver?  Much love and hugs to you.

And Mrs. P, love and hugs to you. You have a long road ahead of you and I hope you only get good results. Chemo's a bitch and surgery is too, but there is an end to the road and I hope great news awaits you at the end. Take care of yourself and let other people take care of you too. And please update us as you feel able, this is an awesomely supportive community.

Edited March 12, 2019 by jjane
extra word

[jjane]

@Scarlett45, Dillard's always has dressy clothes on sale for great prices and Macy's has a section called Last Act, these could be worth a shot. Our Habitat for Humanity Restore has a lot of dressy stuff, usually still with the tags, if you have one near you. Of course, there's always Goodwill. The ones near the richer neighborhoods often have really good dressy  clothes and shoes. I went to one near my home today and someone had donated a boatload of designer shoes.

[lookeyloo]

Chiming in to wish my breast cancer sisters in snark a manageable treatment and complete recovery.  Mine was diagnosed on mammogram in 2009. Lumpectomy and radiation. I still see the oncologist every 6 months. He is ready to discharge me. I’m not ready. 

Re: cocktail type dress - we have gone to a formal dinner every year for about the last 10 years. I have gotten most of my dresses at Goodwill. Some are new with tags. Alterations are not that much. Just have to go frequently enough to check out new donations. 

[bigskygirl]

We had our audit today. We are getting wall, ceiling, and roof insulation work done, along with new heating vents, a new bathroom fan, and a new kitchen/stove exhaust fan. We are crossing fingers we can get new windows. They will taking a look at our furnace and hot water heater to make sure they are running well. We are having some problems with the hot and cold water flow in the bathtub. Could be our new heater acting up due to the cold and snow, the wells where we live since they have been working on them for three years, or we need our pipes flush out due to sand in our pipes. They will working on fixing the front door due to cold drafts. The insulation work could take up to four days, so it will be interesting especially with my eyes and sinuses. My husband might have to take a few days off from due to the noise from the work being done (not being able to sleep during the day after coming home from work.)

The guy who did the audit has hypothyroidism. We ended up comparing notes. He is the first guy I met and talk with who has a thyroid disorder. He did tell me if I started feeling sick during the insulation work to let the workmen know in order to stop the work, but I do no want to slow them down. The workers are busy with their jobs due to the snow and cold. The men who put in the new furnace and water heater last year have been putting in long hours with no days off since early February.

[McManda]

12 hours ago, SunnyBeBe said:

I've been looking online.  If you know of any good sites, I'd like to check them out. 

I had good luck with Rent The Runway, if you're not looking to invest in a dress you only wear once. I got a dress from there for the weekend for a wedding last summer. It was easy and they send a free backup size or style. The only hard part is picking a size; I had to google for the designer website to find sizing charts.

[ChiCricket]

Just wanted to share that my husband and I got married 50 years ago today.

[Love2dance]

That is an amazing milestone. Congratulations @ChiCricket.

Hope you will have a lovely celebration!  🎉❤️💑

[andromeda331]

@Aja I'm so sorry for all you've went through but so happy that your better. @Mrs. P. I am so sorry for all your going through. Praying for both of you!

[SunnyBeBe]

7 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

Just wanted to share that my husband and I got married 50 years ago today.

That's incredible!  Congratulations to you and your husband.  

[BitterApple]

9 hours ago, ChiCricket said:

Just wanted to share that my husband and I got married 50 years ago today.

Happy Anniversary! Any special plans?

[ChiCricket]

5 hours ago, BitterApple said:

Happy Anniversary! Any special plans?

You betcha..my husband is springing for Denny's, because he has a coupon. (seriously) 😂

He did buy me a dozen beautiful pink roses, and $10 worth of scratch off lottery tickets. Hey, I won $8 with them..and I never win. 😁

[galaxychaser]

I’m surprised that only those 2 got caught so far. I always thought that 50% of seats were for sale at Ivy League. Had a chuckle.

https://people.com/crime/lori-loughlin-arrested-alleged-college-admissions-cheating-scam/

[Zella]

1 hour ago, galaxychaser said:

I’m surprised that only those 2 got caught so far. I always thought that 50% of seats were for sale at Ivy League. Had a chuckle.

https://people.com/crime/lori-loughlin-arrested-alleged-college-admissions-cheating-scam/

The details in the complaint are riveting awful! 

My favorite was one girl who they faked into college as a tennis player. The FBI provided a meticulous footnote detailing how badly she sucked at tennis. 😂

As someone who was a first-generation college student, that whole thing makes me so mad, especially felicity Huffman and William h Macy faking a learning disability for their kid to get extra test time. I had students with legitimate learning disabilities whom I used to beg to use the accommodations they were entitled to and needed, and they'd refuse because they felt bad about it. For these two celebrities to fake that to get an unfair advantage for their kid is just disgusting.

Edited March 13, 2019 by Zella

[lilwhitelion]

24 minutes ago, Zella said:

The details in the complaint are riveting awful! 

My favorite was one girl who they faked into college as a tennis player. The FBI provided a meticulous footnote detailing how badly she sucked at tennis. 😂

As someone who was a first-generation college student, that whole thing makes me so mad, especially felicity Huffman and William h Macy faking a learning disability for their kid to get extra test time. I had students with legitimate learning disabilities whom I used to beg to use the accommodations they were entitled to and needed, and they'd refuse because they felt bad about it. For these two celebrities to fake that to get an unfair advantage for their kid is just disgusting.

Not just faked her having a disability for extra time.  They did that so the testing would be at a private facility, not with all the other students taking the SAT, so the bribed proctor could correct her wrong answers after the test without being noticed.

[Zella]

3 minutes ago, lilwhitelion said:

Not just faked her having a disability for extra time.  They did that so the testing would be at a private facility, not with all the other students taking the SAT, so the bribed proctor could correct her wrong answers after the test without being noticed.

Yep it's just so shamefully brazen! I just fixated on the disability part because of my own experiences teaching. 😞

Edited March 13, 2019 by Zella

[ChiCricket]

I am relieved to know that Facebook has been down most of the day.

I thought nobody loved me anymore. 

We did get vey nice phone calls from all five of our kids. We even got a very rare Skype call from our son who is stationed in Germany.😊

[Minivanessa]

2 hours ago, galaxychaser said:

I’m surprised that only those 2 got caught so far. I always thought that 50% of seats were for sale at Ivy League. Had a chuckle.

https://people.com/crime/lori-loughlin-arrested-alleged-college-admissions-cheating-scam/

If they are convicted of what they are charged with? They will have *earned* prison time, on their own merits. And so, lock 'em up. Seriously. Give 'em some time in an exclusive government-funded facility (prison) that not just anybody can be admitted to.

Yeah, I'm just thoroughly disgusted by this. No words.

[BitterApple]

I have to say, I'm a little mind-boggled that the general public is so surprised. Legacy admissions and pay-for-play has been going on for decades. JFK Jr. was a moron and got into Brown and NYU Law. Bush the second was a C-student and ended up at Yale. Thousands of star athletes can't string two words together and magically test high enough to play for top Division 1 schools. Kids being granted admission for reasons other than academic achievement isn't a new phenomenon.

Edited March 14, 2019 by BitterApple

[Zella]

Oh I'm not surprised that rich people cheat to get their idiot kids into nice schools. The college I went to was hardly Ivy League, but there were quite a few legacy cases, and those of us who weren't were pretty snotty about it. LOL 

I'm just appalled at how brazen these people were about it. 

[DangerousMinds]

48 minutes ago, BitterApple said:

I have to say, I'm a little mind-boggled that the general public is so surprised. Legacy admissions and pay-for-play has been going on for decades. JFK Jr. was a moron and got into Brown and NYU Law. Bush the second was a C-student and ended up at Yale. Thousands of star athletes can't string two words together and magically test high enough to play for top Division 1 schools. Kids being granted admission for reasons other than academic achievement isn't a new phenomenon.

I assume that most of those examples did actually want to go to college, though. Lori Laughlin's spoiled little princess daughter has a popular Instagram account where she has said she hates school and didn't plan on going to many classes. She said she just wanted to attend for the games and partying. Sickening.

[Minivanessa]

7 minutes ago, Zella said:

Oh I'm not surprised that rich people cheat to get their idiot kids into nice schools. The college I went to was hardly Ivy League, but there were quite a few legacy cases, and those of us who weren't were pretty snotty about it. LOL 

I'm just appalled at how brazen these people were about it. 

And the typical "legacy" or "pay to play" admission doesn't mean anybody's scammed the college/university/school. The school knows, "well, he's not very bright but his dad was JFK and he's a Kennedy so he's in." Or "her high school grades were mediocre but her grandfather's an alum who's donated a shit-ton for our chemstry lab, so she's in." At least, the school made decisions based on the facts.

When these people paid zillions to Mr. Master Scam Artist, who coordinated their bribing test administrators, getting their kids fake status to take more time for the tests, or having stand-ins take the tests, or have test scores altered, and also submitted faked evidence of athletic participation, fake transcripts, and the like? They were running a scam on the schools. Sure, the school would know "This applicant is the daughter of [wealthy powerful famous] person," but the rest of the application - grades, activities, test scores - would be faked but taken as real by the school. That's a mind-blowing level of cheating, and IMO that goes way beyond the use of wealth and influence to get a fair-to-middling kid admitted to a prestigious school. 

[Zella]

5 minutes ago, Jeeves said:

And the typical "legacy" or "pay to play" admission doesn't mean anybody's scammed the college/university/school. The school knows, "well, he's not very bright but his dad was JFK and he's a Kennedy so he's in." Or "her high school grades were mediocre but her grandfather's an alum who's donated a shit-ton for our chemstry lab, so she's in." At least, the school made decisions based on the facts.

When these people paid zillions to Mr. Master Scam Artist, who coordinated their bribing test administrators, getting their kids fake status to take more time for the tests, or having stand-ins take the tests, or have test scores altered, and also submitted faked evidence of athletic participation, fake transcripts, and the like? They were running a scam on the schools. Sure, the school would know "This applicant is the daughter of [wealthy powerful famous] person," but the rest of the application - grades, activities, test scores - would be faked but taken as real by the school. That's a mind-blowing level of cheating, and IMO that goes way beyond the use of wealth and influence to get a fair-to-middling kid admitted to a prestigious school. 

Exactly!

I really shouldn't have compared it to strictly legacy cases. Quite a few of our legacy cases would not have been admitted, I think, without that, but I have no reason to believe anything in their applications were fraudulent. The school made it clear having family who attended could be considered in your favor, so it wasn't a surprise to anybody. Of course, it didn't stop the rest of us from giving them some side-eye and shit about it, but they didn't do anything wrong. It was no more their fault they had a family connection than it was my fault for not having one. 

Honestly, I think these celebrity parents probably would have saved money and time and effort by just writing a damn check to the university rather than all the conniving and scheming they did do. 

Edited March 14, 2019 by Zella

[Marshmallow Mollie]

@Aja and @Mrs. P. and @lookeyloo you are in good company! I was diagnosed at age 31. I opted for the mastectomy instead of lumpectomy and radiation combo. I did not have time for radiation. Friday was sixth cancerversary!

My cancer was her2 positive. Mrs P I am sure you are up on the latest even more than I am, but I saw they just approved or something a new treatment for triple negative. I think it was an immunotherapy. I was pumped they are making progress on triple negative treatments.

I will be a Debbie Downer for a minute and say that one third of women who are diagnosed with an early stage breast cancer will go on to have a recurrence diagnosed as metastatic breast cancer. Link There is no cure for metastatic breast cancer. So yes, schedule your mammograms (which don’t hurt), know your family history, see a genetic counselor to see if genetic testing is appropriate for you. 

[DangerousMinds]

About Lori Loughlin's spoiled useless daughter:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/lori-loughlin-olivia-jade-dont-care_n_5c88dc34e4b0450ddae5cad2?utm_campaign=hp_fb_pages&ncid=fcbklnkushpmg00000063&utm_medium=facebook&ir=Entertainment&utm_source=main_fb

[bigskygirl]

The whole getting my kid into college scandal reminded me of what happened in Helena in the 1990’s.

The school district wanted students to have a 2.00 grade point average for extra curricular activities. Parents were upset, lawsuits were brought up, some parents ended up moving to other towns where their kids could play sports with lower grade point requirements because they wanted the kid to get a sport college scholarship. A few kids were suidical because they may not have been able to play sports anymore. It did not matter their kids could not read or write has long as they got a sport scholarship. What happened if they got injured aka no more playing sports, or flunked out of college because of no decent reading, writing or math skills. Plus the fact they probably could not fill out a job application after college.

Btw, I woke up this morning with a headache after having a weird dream about the Duggar clan showing up to do the work on the house. Stay out of my dreams Duggars!!!

[Sew Sumi]

Stay out of @bigskygirl's house, Duggars! 

I lost my Boo kitty last night. We knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier to say goodbye. I treasure the 12 years we had together, but now she's at the Bridge with all of her brothers that came before her. 

Edited March 14, 2019 by Sew Sumi

[Suzn]

5 minutes ago, Sew Sumi said:

Stay out of @bigskygirl's house, Duggars! 

I lost my Boo kitty last night. We knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier to say goodbye. I treasure the 12 years we had together, but now she's at the Bridge with all of her brothers that cane before her. 

I'm so sorry for your loss.  I lost one recently and it never gets any easier.

[Mindthinkr]

@Sew Sumi My condolences on your loss and purrs from the Mindthinkr kitties. 

[lookeyloo]

@Sew Sumi -so sorry.  We have been down that road more than once and it is heartbreaking.  

[Christina87]

20 hours ago, Jeeves said:

And the typical "legacy" or "pay to play" admission doesn't mean anybody's scammed the college/university/school. The school knows, "well, he's not very bright but his dad was JFK and he's a Kennedy so he's in." Or "her high school grades were mediocre but her grandfather's an alum who's donated a shit-ton for our chemstry lab, so she's in." At least, the school made decisions based on the facts.

When these people paid zillions to Mr. Master Scam Artist, who coordinated their bribing test administrators, getting their kids fake status to take more time for the tests, or having stand-ins take the tests, or have test scores altered, and also submitted faked evidence of athletic participation, fake transcripts, and the like? They were running a scam on the schools. Sure, the school would know "This applicant is the daughter of [wealthy powerful famous] person," but the rest of the application - grades, activities, test scores - would be faked but taken as real by the school. That's a mind-blowing level of cheating, and IMO that goes way beyond the use of wealth and influence to get a fair-to-middling kid admitted to a prestigious school. 

This is SUCH a good post!!! I wish I could like it ten times. 

I'm wondering why the parents couldn't just send their children to a normal college and cut a huge check after they graduate. I mean...how long would it take me, as a teacher, to earn 500K? Quite a while, sadly. Why not just give them all this money to help them when they graduate instead of wasting it now? Seems like that would benefit the child more. 

[BitterApple]

13 minutes ago, Christina87 said:

This is SUCH a good post!!! I wish I could like it ten times. 

I'm wondering why the parents couldn't just send their children to a normal college and cut a huge check after they graduate. I mean...how long would it take me, as a teacher, to earn 500K? Quite a while, sadly. Why not just give them all this money to help them when they graduate instead of wasting it now? Seems like that would benefit the child more. 

If you look at Olivia Jade, she has a sizeable Instagram following and she's always doing paid sponsorships. I think the whole "going to USC" scheme was concoted so she could capitalize on the college market and make the money back in spades via social media. She flat-out admitted on YouTube that she had no interest in school. Plus her parents falsely claimed the payout as a tax write-off, so they were working it to their benefit as well. 

[Marshmallow Mollie]

2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Stay out of @bigskygirl's house, Duggars! 

I lost my Boo kitty last night. We knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier to say goodbye. I treasure the 12 years we had together, but now she's at the Bridge with all of her brothers that came before her. 

Geez Louise you can’t catch a break! I am so sorry to hear this!

[jcbrown]

2 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

I lost my Boo kitty last night. We knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier to say goodbye. I treasure the 12 years we had together, but now she's at the Bridge with all of her brothers that came before her. 

I'm so sorry for your loss. My 19 year-old kid is curled on my lap as I type. She has kidney disease, high blood pressure, and eye problems as a result but she is still herself and still happy and curled up exactly where she has been since she was three weeks old. Losing beloved animal family members is so wrenching.

[Absolom]

1 hour ago, Christina87 said:

I'm wondering why the parents couldn't just send their children to a normal college and cut a huge check after they graduate. I mean...how long would it take me, as a teacher, to earn 500K? Quite a while, sadly. Why not just give them all this money to help them when they graduate instead of wasting it now? Seems like that would benefit the child more. 

Why bother with it to send the one kid to USC who said she only went to party?  It doesn't sound like several of them were even planning on finishing. 

[Zella]

3 hours ago, Sew Sumi said:

Stay out of @bigskygirl's house, Duggars! 

I lost my Boo kitty last night. We knew it was coming, but that didn't make it any easier to say goodbye. I treasure the 12 years we had together, but now she's at the Bridge with all of her brothers that came before her. 

So sorry about your kitty. 😞 

[andromeda331]

I'm so sorry for your loss @Sew Sumi. 

[ChiCricket]

6 hours ago, BitterApple said:

If you look at Olivia Jade, she has a sizeable Instagram following and she's always doing paid sponsorships

That might be had paid sponsorships.

Brands distance themselves from Lori Loughlin and daughter Olivia Jade

Ps so sorry to hear about your kitty, Sew.

(I'm reading posts out of order.)

Edited March 15, 2019 by ChiCricket

[Love2dance]

May your memories of your sweet kitty console you, @Sew Sumi.

[Minivanessa]

I'm so sorry about your kitty, @Sew Sumi. 

[Marshmallow Mollie]

I was going through old photos, and check out this picture of me in 1992 😎 I would have fit right in with the Duggar line up! 

[BitterApple]

Wasn't there a picture of the Duggar-bots dressed in red and white outfits during Boob's Senate run?