S13.E01: The Eaglewoman Has Landed

[TexasGal]

Quote

Dorit hosts the ladies at a retreat; Erika seeks to rebuild her life following her husband's indictment; Garcelle tries to navigate her relationships with her teenage boys; Kyle's new focus on self-care offers a sobering look at her home life.

Airdate: 10.25.2023

Reminder: Real time events that have happened are spoilers until they occur in episode time.  Please continue to discuss those events in the respective housewife's thread or in the media thread.

[FlyingEgret]

Looking forward to a Rinna-free season!

[Chicklet]

This has failure written all over it I'm guessing. Fun times.

[Stats Queen]

4 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

This has failure written all over it I'm guessing. Fun times.

Do you think Eaglewoman might be involved?

[Straycat80]

Looking forward to watching this later. Darn Survivor is on at the same time. So happy Rinna and the Willian are gone! 

[Chicklet]

I think anything that involves a mix of any of these women is bad lol. Poor Eaglewoman, I feel sorry for her, guess she doesn't have a tv?

[bosawks]

Man, this is really tough.

Do I care less about Dorito’s marriage or Kyle’s marriage?

It’s just so hard!

 

[JenE4]

$300,000 a month for spousal support?!? Not even child support—just for Sutton! “The anchor,” of course, being that if she gets married (maybe even living with a boyfriend?) spousal support payments would cease.

[Keywestclubkid]

300,000 a month? She gets 300,000 A MONTH .. Sutton girl you better not give up that spousal support 

[Chicklet]

Erika asking how to have empathy?? She's a horrible human.

[WaltersHair]

Isn't this the therapist from Bridalplasty, or some such reality show? My enthusiams is not high for this season.

[JenE4]

2 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

Erika asking how to have empathy?? She's a horrible human.

“How do you get that? Where does it come from?” Woooow. Cue the ghosts of Christmas Present, Past, and Future! 

[Stats Queen]

First, I don’t trust a Bravo therapist. second, Erika said she was married to the must unsupportive person ever - WTF - he bankrolled your “Pat the puss” with ill gotten gains.

Erika is a trash human being.

[FlyingEgret]

Man, I have screen envy after seeing Maricio's home office...

[SnarkAttack]

Some thoughts.

I like Dorit's darker hair.  Her face looks different.  Still doing Chanel advertising.

Erica is awful.  Being so thin really makes her breasts look like bolt-ons.  Hormones, right.

Love Sutton's horse!

Sounds like Kyle's had enough.  Go Kyle!

So glad Rinna is gone.

[Emmeline]

27 minutes ago, Chicklet said:

Erika asking how to have empathy?? She's a horrible human.

I just couldn’t believe she said that!  She needs more therapy than just trying to put herself in other peoples shoes.  There is something seriously wrong with Erika.

[psychoticstate]

$300,000 a MONTH?  Boy, did I choose wrong when I got married.  

I'm with Dorit - Erica's hormones are Ozempic or the like.  She's way too skinny and she looks horrible.  I do like Dorit's darker hair.  

The pizza scene with Kyle and Dorit - in several shots of Kyle, it was like looking at Kathy's face with Kyle's hair.  First time I've ever seen such a resemblance.

The tattoo scene with Kyle and Mo was hard to watch. Did Mo really not know about Kyle's extra tattoos?  That scene came across scripted to me. 

Garcelle's sons really have great personalities.  I hurt for her when Jax said he needed parenting two years ago but not now.  Still love her.  I hope she brings the snark and zingers this season.  

Did we see Crystal at all besides the Eaglewoman retreat?  

[QQQQ]

I think Dorit is trolling viewers with her corrugated, vulcanized CHANEL talking head ensemble.

[Pi237]

Kyle's face is different again. She's getting that look where certain Expressions contort her face bizarrely. 

Ericka lmao Every Woman Knows Hormones make you fatter! Liar.

[Stats Queen]

8 minutes ago, Pi237 said:

Ericka lmao Every Woman Knows Hormones make you fatter! Liar.

Liar, liar, your latex pants are on fire.

[Pi237]

Its always funny how they constantly hire these 'healers' to help them connect and work through their feelings when they Never Stop talking about their feelings. I've never seen people talk about their hurt feelings more than these women. I know it's their job, but come on! More action less 'I need to confront you about my feelings AGAIN' 

[Lady of nod]

1 hour ago, Chicklet said:

Erika asking how to have empathy?? She's a horrible human.

Confirming what we’ve always known. The woman is a fucking sociopath.

[goofygirl]

Erika needing to learn empathy had me howling!  I USED to think that Berman lady psychotherapist had some bona fides... Not any more.

I'm SO happy we didn't have to see Rinna and her lips. Her kidz. Her huzzban.

Edited October 26, 2023 by goofygirl

[njbchlover]

1 hour ago, Chicklet said:

I think anything that involves a mix of any of these women is bad lol. Poor Eaglewoman, I feel sorry for her, guess she doesn't have a tv?

Eaglewoman was very nice and didn't seem quite as kooky as some of the other "healers" we've seen on RH franchises.

Also, Eaglewoman's assistant had a beautiful voice - very soothing.  

1 hour ago, Chicklet said:

Erika asking how to have empathy?? She's a horrible human.

I don't think that empathy is really something you can learn, especially if you are a cold-hearted, mercenary, narcissistic bitch.  

You either just have empathy or not, and Erika will NEVER have it.  It's just not in her DNA.

[blixie]

Quote

Every Woman Knows Hormones make you fatter! Liar.

I mean she is definitely lying but there is a lot of whoo whoo out there about having your hormones "balanced" after menopause will help with all kinds of shit, including weightloss. Cortisol is the new gluten. And as whoo whoo shit goes I actually do think hormones are hella powerful but managing them to achieve x result seems highly unlikely. But also nothing wrong with using semaglutides for weightloss and lots are prescribed and marketed on label for weightloss, cracking on Erika for her body being to heavy or too skinny ain't it.

Kyle and Mo's convo felt especially scripted, but if they were already deep into living separate lives than it makes sense it felt more stilted and a quick way to establish the season long storyline.

I like Dorit's hair and her calling out fucking Erika. 

I think Crystal's husband had more lines than she did.

Still love Sutton and Garcelle, and I thought she weathered Jax's truth pretty well and while I can understand where he's coming from it's pure 15 year old punk assery to do that on camera and I would guess in few years he'll have more empathy for what it's been like for his mom post divorce, having to up her hustle and have less face time with the twins.

Edited October 26, 2023 by blixie

[Straycat80]

These ‘healers’ never do any good that lasts. The ladies have their kumbaya moment and then go back to smack talking and back stabbing each other.

I think Kyle, Erika,  Sutton and possibly Dorit have boarded the Ozempic train. Too skinny. And yeah, trust me Erika, you gain weight with hormones not lose.

Trouble in paradise for Kyle and possibly Dorit? I am assuming Kathy is not going to be on the show this season? Kyle said a lot about Kathy hurting her and it doesn’t sound like they are speaking. 

[QQQQ]

Erika knows all about whore moans.

[Pi237]

I’m not criticizing Erika’s weight. I also would never look down on anyone who used Ozempic. I’d get it if I could. I’m just sick of people lying about it. ‘Hormones, I drink a lot of water, I get lots of sleep, etc.’   A famous person being honest about weight loss would go along way toward de-stigmatizing those who need surgery or meds to make it happen. 
 

That ‘you weren’t a parent when I needed you to be’ comment would break my heart. But He’s young and has no clue right now. He’ll be apologizing for that when he gets older, especially if he has kids of his own. 

[njbchlover]

I somehow can't believe that Kyle gained all this self-worth and "fuck everyone" attitude from her issues with Kathy at last year's reunion.

Kyle and Kathy (and Kim) have had an up and down, love/hate relationship forever, since they were all kids - their Mom really played them against each other, so I'm just not buying Kyle's reasoning for her current attitude.

Now, because of Kathy's actions at the end of last season's shows, all of a sudden, Kyle is doing all this stuff for herself, putting herself first, blah, blah, blah, me, me, me.  

I'm still not convinced that Kyle and Mauricio aren't doing all of this so that Kyle has a sympathetic season, and after the season airs, they will "miraculously" have reunited.

 

Edited October 26, 2023 by njbchlover

[hottesthw]

29 minutes ago, njbchlover said:

I somehow can't believe that Kyle gained all this self-worth and "fuck everyone" attitude from her issues with Kathy at last year's reunion.

Kyle and Kathy (and Kim) have had an up and down, love/hate relationship forever, since they were all kids - their Mom really played them against each other, so I'm just not buying Kyle's reasoning for her current attitude.

Now, because of Kathy's actions at the end of last season's shows, all of a sudden, Kyle is doing all this stuff for herself, putting herself first, blah, blah, blah, me, me, me.  

I'm still not convinced that Kyle and Mauricio aren't doing all of this so that Kyle has a sympathetic season, and after the season airs, they will "miraculously" have reunited.

 

I totally agree. Kyle sure did have a lot of “come to Jesus” moments in less than 6 months from reunion to filming. The scene with her and Mo convinced me that this is all just their act for this season. He’s a terrible actor. And again, in less than 6 months they went from lovey dovey to her being some oppressed housewife getting secret tattoos to get thru her days? Nope not buying it. And after watching her on the show that followed and her scripted replies there, it was solidified for me. She can’t even speak her sisters name without getting her froggy crying voice on, but when asked about her seeing Mo holding hands with his partners she’s all “ehhh I didn’t like it”. Yea ok! Goodbye Kyle! 

[QQQQ]

I wonder which parts of her marriage feel the most suffocating. The mansions? The month-long vacations to exotic places? A husband who has her back in ongoing fights with family members and cast mates? Oh, the struggle.

Edited October 26, 2023 by QQQQ

[Pattycake2]

Secret tattoos?  I just watched the reunion show from last season and she showed Andy three tattoos she got on a recent trip to NYC.  Two of them she identified as representing her daughters.  The third was the infamous heart tattoo.  she just smiled and said it was special.  There’s been trouble in paradise for a long time.

[hoodooznoodooz]

Sutton put one of Jennifer’s salted caramels in her ear.

[WaltersHair]

I know Kyle converted to Judaism for Maurice. Tattoos are frowned upon and that was perhaps the show's subtle way of opening the door to a 'rift.'

[SemiCharmedLife]

2 hours ago, blixie said:

I mean she is definitely lying but there is a lot of whoo whoo out there about having your hormones "balanced" after menopause will help with all kinds of shit, including weightloss. Cortisol is the new gluten. And as whoo whoo shit goes I actually do think hormones are hella powerful but managing them to achieve x result seems highly unlikely. But also nothing wrong with using semaglutides for weightloss and lots are prescribed and marketed on label for weightloss, cracking on Erika for her body being to heavy or too skinny ain't it.

There is now a shortage of semaglutides, which affects the diabetics it was designed to help, due to the large demand as a weight loss drug for the wealthy.  

[Chalby]

4 hours ago, bosawks said:

Man, this is really tough.

Do I care less about Dorito’s marriage or Kyle’s marriage?

It’s just so hard!

 

I laughed when Dorit singled out that comment to confront Erika or be "hurt" about. PK and Dorit appear very close and supportive of each other, so when Erika said their marriage, I immediately knew why. I truly believe she and Dorit already discussed it after Bravocom, and prior to this season starting. This entire episode seemed staged.

1 hour ago, hottesthw said:

I totally agree. Kyle sure did have a lot of “come to Jesus” moments in less than 6 months from reunion to filming. The scene with her and Mo convinced me that this is all just their act for this season. He’s a terrible actor.

I agree. And it seemed that all these issues between her and Mo were now leaked in the hopes it would shock the fans as much as Scandoval. It's like they saw that and determined their next step.

[Salacious Kitty]

24 minutes ago, Chalby said:

I laughed when Dorit singled out that comment to confront Erika or be "hurt" about. PK and Dorit appear very close and supportive of each other, so when Erika said their marriage, I immediately knew why. I truly believe she and Dorit already discussed it after Bravocom, and prior to this season starting. This entire episode seemed staged.

I agree. And it seemed that all these issues between her and Mo were now leaked in the hopes it would shock the fans as much as Scandoval. It's like they saw that and determined their next step.

I thought PK and Dorit seemed out of sorts in their scene. I sensed tension between them.

[Chalby]

I just finished the episode and I love Garcelle. She still is one of my all-time favorites (and her family). But Kyle is "off". If anything, I've always appreciated Kyle's sense of humor. She can be so funny at times. But I didn't see any of that, not even a sparkle in her eye. I'm wondering if she's desperate for any kind of storyline because, when you think about it, Maurizio is doing very well on his TV show and HE got on "Dancing With the Stars". I bet Kyle is jealous that he is front and center now. I have to admit, I wouldn't like it. I'd feel insecure.

[UsernameFatigue]

The only thing I really learned in the opening epi is that in between taping and the talking heads, Kyle had her lips plumped up. 

Did they say what Erika said about Dorito's marriage that upset her? If they did I missed it. I don't remember hearing the rumor that PK had a woman in the car with him when he got the DUI. 

I know this will be an UO, but I miss Rinna. 

Edited October 27, 2023 by UsernameFatigue

[hoodooznoodooz]

1 hour ago, UsernameFatigue said:

Did they say what Erika said about Dorito's marriage that upset her? If they did I missed it. I don't remember hearing the rumor that PK had a woman in the car with him when he got the DUI. 

They only showed us that when the MC asked Erika which Housewife couple she thought would be next to divorce, Erika gleefully? smugly? said, “Dorit and PK.”

That would hurt my feelings, too. 

But it would upset me even more if my partner and I had been going through a rough patch. 

[Chatty Cake]

What a little douche Garcelles son was on camera! Awww he didn’t get what he needed from mommy? I doubt his punk ass would have loved life if she was struggling financially but was home all the time. The other twin seemed more normal wanting to be with his girlfriend although a little annoying as well. 
Kyle is way overdoing the marriage storyline. Her and Mo were fake when they were lovey Dover’s and they are even worse now. I personally think she chose a lady fake love interest because I don’t think he would have tolerated a man. What was he calling her? Moonbeam? Love bean? Fake! I found Pk chowing on chips to be a more realistic scene of home life.
Erika ever the asshole. 
These ladies could have a preschool teacher do the healing work as they do the hokey okey pokey. We all know they will be screaming at each other in no time.

[ZettaK]

9 hours ago, psychoticstate said:

$300,000 a MONTH?  Boy, did I choose wrong when I got married.  

I'm with Dorit - Erica's hormones are Ozempic or the like.  She's way too skinny and she looks horrible.  I do like Dorit's darker hair.  

The pizza scene with Kyle and Dorit - in several shots of Kyle, it was like looking at Kathy's face with Kyle's hair.  First time I've ever seen such a resemblance.

The tattoo scene with Kyle and Mo was hard to watch. Did Mo really not know about Kyle's extra tattoos?  That scene came across scripted to me. 

Garcelle's sons really have great personalities.  I hurt for her when Jax said he needed parenting two years ago but not now.  Still love her.  I hope she brings the snark and zingers this season.  

Did we see Crystal at all besides the Eaglewoman retreat?  

I think that Kyle and Mo filmed a lot of scenes together and separately after the sesson filming ended. We saw season previews which were filmed after. 

[bosawks]

10 hours ago, Stats Queen said:

First, I don’t trust a Bravo therapist. second, Erika said she was married to the must unsupportive person ever - WTF - he bankrolled your “Pat the puss” with ill gotten gains.

Erika is a trash human being.

Maybe she meant the most "unsupportive lawyer" ever.........

[Mr. Miner]

PK looks like he has a whole mouth full of rotten teeth. 🤷‍♂️

[Chalby]

2 hours ago, Chatty Cake said:

What a little douche Garcelles son was on camera! Awww he didn’t get what he needed from mommy? I doubt his punk ass would have loved life if she was struggling financially but was home all the time.

I loved what he said. This is the one time that appeared "real" to me. I've got four kids, so I saw a bit of my own history making me  chuckle when Garcelle got an answer she wasn't expecting. Yep, Been there! She handled it well, and it was relatable.

[SweetieDarling]

10 hours ago, njbchlover said:

I don't think that empathy is really something you can learn, especially if you are a cold-hearted, mercenary, narcissistic bitch.  

You either just have empathy or not, and Erika will NEVER have it.  It's just not in her DNA.

I am picturing tying Erika to a chair and making her watch a marathon of Mr Rogers, but she'd only say, in her flat, emotionless voice "I don't get it"

You know why Erika will never learn empathy? because it would require her to think of other people and their thoughts and emotions. She only thinks of Erika. She must have been an amazing mother (sarcasm)

[janiema]

7 hours ago, Chalby said:

I laughed when Dorit singled out that comment to confront Erika or be "hurt" about. PK and Dorit appear very close and supportive of each other, so when Erika said their marriage, I immediately knew why. I truly believe she and Dorit already discussed it after Bravocom, and prior to this season starting. This entire episode seemed staged.

I agree. And it seemed that all these issues between her and Mo were now leaked in the hopes it would shock the fans as much as Scandoval. It's like they saw that and determined their next step.

She’s still competing with LVP.

7 hours ago, Chalby said:

I laughed when Dorit singled out that comment to confront Erika or be "hurt" about. PK and Dorit appear very close and supportive of each other, so when Erika said their marriage, I immediately knew why. I truly believe she and Dorit already discussed it after Bravocom, and prior to this season starting. This entire episode seemed staged.

I agree. And it seemed that all these issues between her and Mo were now leaked in the hopes it would shock the fans as much as Scandoval. It's like they saw that and determined their next step.

She’s also still competing with her sister, Kathy.

[bichonblitz]

Kyle has a new face. 

[janiema]

3 minutes ago, bichonblitz said:

Kyle has a new face. 

But unfortunately the same personality.  

[rlc]

32 minutes ago, janiema said:

She’s still competing with LVP.

And she's still losing.