Jed! and Katey: Biblically Bunking Together

[satrunrose]

i wonder what this means for TLC. I know they didn't film Justin's wedding either, but I was assuming if the show carries on that they would buy some snippets from the videographer or Duggar media and show that. With the Jedding, though, there isn't even a snippet of those vows that are in any way mainstream. I can't imagine how TLC could cut it to make something that isn't highly creepy for anything but a hard core fundie.

Edited April 4, 2021 by satrunrose

[cmr2014]

2 minutes ago, satrunrose said:

i wonder what this means for TLC. I know they didn't film Justin's wedding either, but I was assuming if the show carries on that they would buy some snippets from the videographer or Duggar media and show that. With the Jedding, though, there isn't even a snippet of those vows that are in any way man stream. I can't imagine how TLC could cut it to make something that isn't highly creepy for anything but a hard core fundie.

Maybe they'll just show some video with music over it and cut to the reception?

[Churchhoney]

9 minutes ago, satrunrose said:

I can't imagine how TLC could cut it to make something that isn't highly creepy for anything but a hard core fundie.

I kind of think the Duggars have kept it on the QT for the same reason. Anybody who's anywhere near mainstream will find those vows creepy, and they know their ratings depend on somebody other than the hardest core watching the show...

[satrunrose]

6 minutes ago, cmr2014 said:

This seems like a mistake in terms of a political career. There was some talk back when Jed! was campaigning that he was being mocked for living with his parents and sharing a room with his brothers. I don't think that having his father arrange a wedding for him is going to make him seem more mature or relatable in any way.

There are a lot of fundies in Arkansas and there a lot of conservatives in Arkansas, but I bet you can count the number of arranged marriages in Arkansas on one hand.

Yeah, I'd say anyone up against the gargantuan task of taking down the Duggar political machine would only need to make sure that video makes the social media rounds at the right time. But isn't that so the Duggar way? Instead of using your impressive savings to build a house to fit your kids, you become a one issue candidate in an unwindable race (and expect your 16 and under children to build you a house successfully 'cause they watched some dude once). Instead of figuring out what the heck you can do for ALL your kids after Josh you ship him off to build Hobby Lobbies and get the girls to lock themselves in their rooms. 

Duggers inc. could have given Jed a fighting chance by setting him up with a real apartment and some kind of credentials that would get  him a job other than odd jobs for daddy. I suppose in the bigger picture, though, an arranged marriage that's even weird for conservatives is the best case scenario for the rest of us.

[QuinnInND]

The vows were creepy and so is the whole arranged marriage thing. 

[FizzyPuff]

Oh I found video, thanks to a reddit user: Start at about 2:55 if you don't want to hear that annoying voice over.

 

[Jynnan tonnix]

I guess the best we can hope is that they will find enough in common, and enough actual chemistry that love will grow. It's certainly not an uncommon thing among people in whose cultures arranged marriages have been the norm. Granted, some can find themselves in horrendous situations, but for those with similar backgrounds, upbringings and values, bonds can grow which are potentially at least as strong, and maybe stronger than those between people whose marriage was based on a love match.

The part of the vows I really don't get, though, is the promise to love someone you really don't know. I mean, I do get, as I said, that similar backgrounds will reinforce a bond based in what you believe a marriage should be, and it's reasonable likely that with the right incentive and determination, you can build a strong relationship, but is that necessarily going to be love? How can you promise that that will be a component? If you are already in love, you can promise to do all you can to keep it alive, but it seems to me that an arranged marriage can't really include a promise to love one another. Yes, love growing is a wonderful possibility, and definitely a perk, but, really, shouldn't the best actual promise in an arranged marriage be one of building a strong working relationship (including procreation) and remaining faithful?

[GeeGolly]

Oh Lordy, the wedding couple sang.

[Chicklet]

Both of them sang? It looked like a girl with a pinkish dress unless the video was that bad.

[Churchhoney]

17 minutes ago, Jynnan tonnix said:

I guess the best we can hope is that they will find enough in common, and enough actual chemistry that love will grow. It's certainly not an uncommon thing among people in whose cultures arranged marriages have been the norm. Granted, some can find themselves in horrendous situations, but for those with similar backgrounds, upbringings and values, bonds can grow which are potentially at least as strong, and maybe stronger than those between people whose marriage was based on a love match.

The part of the vows I really don't get, though, is the promise to love someone you really don't know. I mean, I do get, as I said, that similar backgrounds will reinforce a bond based in what you believe a marriage should be, and it's reasonable likely that with the right incentive and determination, you can build a strong relationship, but is that necessarily going to be love? How can you promise that that will be a component? If you are already in love, you can promise to do all you can to keep it alive, but it seems to me that an arranged marriage can't really include a promise to love one another. Yes, love growing is a wonderful possibility, and definitely a perk, but, really, shouldn't the best actual promise in an arranged marriage be one of building a strong working relationship (including procreation) and remaining faithful?

I think the Gothard cult and other similar groups depend on promising people the fairy tale, though. They really stress how following their rules is what creates love

They refuse to present a marriage with their rules as an arrangement so that both people will have a home that runs and somebody who's agreed to be faithful and responsible with whom to have, support and care for children, as has been done elsewhere and in our past. For them, unlike for most cultures and times that have had a lot of arranged marriages, arranged marriage isn't about making society work in a realistic way, or shoring up families' fortunes or anything like that.

Instead, they deliberately paint a really pretty picture of how the love and even the "in love" that people want comes when and only when you do what their God commands. Because they're really trying to sell the notion that it's God as they conceive of him that gives you all the things you desire. They're using the promise of a special fairy-tale particularly loving marriage as a kind of bribe to sell belief in their religion., I think.

 

 

 

Edited April 4, 2021 by Churchhoney

[dargosmydaddy]

14 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Oh Lordy, the wedding couple sang.

That was Jason (not Jed!) singing. Not sure who the girl is, but it's not Katey. (Obviously, since Jason and Katey singing would be a whole new level of weird!)

[Zella]

I can't even explain why, but I'm envisioning Jason as the sister who sings terribly on Dirty Dancing, and I just can't stop laughing. 

[Temperance]

2 minutes ago, dargosmydaddy said:

That was Jason (not Jed!) singing. Not sure who the girl is, but it's not Katey. (Obviously, since Jason and Katey singing would be a whole new level of weird!)

I'm not sure who she is either. She is reportedly one of the Andregg sisters. I'm not sure whether that was married Lauren singing or her single sister Ashlynn.

[Minivanessa]

Well said, @Churchhoney. This isn't a marriage arranged because of cultural norms which themselves are based on sensible values including creating stable homes and families by partnering up a couple with shared values, in a marriage approved and supported by their families of origin. This is just patriarchal dynasty brokering, cloaked in Bible-babble claiming that GOD HIMSELF has ordained it and this is specially blessed and holy and yes, it's a guarantee of special love and happiness and for all I know, fucking unicorns and Godly rainbows forever and ever amen.

IOW, patriarchal power tripping wrapped up in religious bullshit. JB's a devious greedy power-hungry weasel (sorry to insult fine actual weasels) and IMO Katey's dad is probably just nuts. Jed! seems like Josh 2.0. It's all creepy as fuck.

[rue721]

These "adults" are fed a line that this is what marriage IS. I would bet anything that they don't truly understand how their marriage is different from a love match, because what a love match even is has been obscured more and more from them...

I mean, even in a supposed love match in this family, the man goes to the father and asks to court/marry. He needs to "woo" the father with a zillion page questionnaire, etc. This is just a bit further down that same track, with the fathers brokering the match among each other, instead of at least the son/potential son-in-law taking up for himself. But the bride always had her father acting as proxy.

The whole thing is just so bizarre... imagine your father having more of a say in if or to whom you get married than you do! Thank god my father and boyfriend would both be horrified, I wouldn't want to be saddled with a man or a parent so controlling that they would want to do this.

[BitterApple]

Are the Duggars still considered royalty in Fundie circles? If so, that's Kory's angle. I think his divorce pushed him deep into the IBLP rabbit hole. Maybe he has the money, but not the status he craves within that sect. A marriage to a Duggar gives him access to the top tier.

As for Boob, he's all about the dollar signs. I'm sure he's banking on Kory contributing heavily to Jed's future campaigns. Also, a wealthy FIL takes some of the burden off for when TLC finally kicks the Duggars to the curb. 

[emmawoodhouse]

43 minutes ago, GeeGolly said:

Oh Lordy, the wedding couple sang.

That was Jason and Lauren Andregg-WhateverHerMarriedNameIsNow. 

Edited April 4, 2021 by emmawoodhouse

[irisheyes]

So, did JB and the other father stand at the door to ensure the Jedding happened as contracted?  Is the bed blessed beforehand?  Will there be a display of the virginal sheets tomorrow?

[rue721]

Also, Jed! and Katey both look incredibly nervous to me. I hope that things go OK tonight.

The more I've learned of arranged marriage the scarier it seems to me. Any kind of love or bond between the couple seems like such an afterthought. It's not the point, so if it happens... great. But if it doesn't... *shrug* The marriage is still considered a success anyhow. Your husband beats you, humiliates you, ignores you, rapes you, forces you to bare endless children you can't care for? Too bad, but marriage and the "career" of being a wife is your lot in life so... *shrug* C'est la vie.

Actually, right on my apartment hall there is a family with an endless stair-step stream of children, and when I FINALLY saw the mother for the first time the other day... she just looked so exhausted, and so young. My heart broke. I don't thing a big family is necessarily a sad thing at all! But the look on her face... it just looked like " the laundry room breakdown" could be on its way. In retrospect, it makes me think of Kendra, who lately seems to realize her life is spinning out of control but that the kids are going to keep coming and so she won't be able to stop it. In so many cultures -- including the Duggars' -- that mentality is just so normalized.

[emmawoodhouse]

Jed! professes luv.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOcj9JMCoS/?igshid=wv3hqesxg3qr

[madpsych78]

2 hours ago, JoanArc said:

I suspect the older gentleman to the right of Boob and in front of Stephen is probably Mr. Wissman. And the woman to the right of them is perhaps Hannah?

[Absolom]

I wish more of the fundie brides would hire a professional hair dresser and put up that straggly hair.  I can not fathom getting married of all things with long hair flopping and stringing around.

[emmawoodhouse]

Katey's mom and brother. Note the sinful short hair.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOc74CMOnQ/?igshid=sbxaxfgce3l4

[Zella]

3 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Katey's mom and brother. Note the sinful short hair.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOc74CMOnQ/?igshid=sbxaxfgce3l4

A comment from WOACB (taken with grain of salt but she does seem to have some sources at least based on the Jedding scoop) on the cause of the Duggar-Caldwell falling out:

"Honestly, I haven’t gotten a straight answer. Something happened at church, in the nursery, that’s where it started. Then Paul & Jim got into it - Jim wanted Paul to pay rent for the house they lived in & the Caldwell’s were forced to move out. Joe has a strained relationship with his parents I’m told. But I don’t know what exactly happened." 

I didn't catch, but who officiated this wedding? She is saying in other comments that he is the pastor at the church they began attending after the Caldwell brouhaha. 

[emmawoodhouse]

I didn't recognize the officiant, but WOACB says with some certainty it's the pastor of the Duggars' new church. 

Edited April 4, 2021 by emmawoodhouse

[emmawoodhouse]

Duggarfam acknowledges the Jedding.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOdUM-BGcK/?igshid=86py23wuuksg

[Churchhoney]

58 minutes ago, dargosmydaddy said:

That was Jason (not Jed!) singing. Not sure who the girl is, but it's not Katey. (Obviously, since Jason and Katey singing would be a whole new level of weird!)

Could it have been Katey's sister, Lauren, I wonder? She famously went to some Gothard music camp last year. (ugh)

55 minutes ago, Temperance said:

I'm not sure who she is either. She is reportedly one of the Andregg sisters. I'm not sure whether that was married Lauren singing or her single sister Ashlynn.

Good grief, how many Laurens are there in this crowd? 

Edited April 4, 2021 by Churchhoney

[emmawoodhouse]

Just now, Churchhoney said:

Could it have been Katey's sister, Lauren, I wonder? She famously went to some Gothard music camp last year. (ugh)

No, it was another Lauren, Andregg.

[irisheyes]

9 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Duggarfam acknowledges the Jedding.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOdUM-BGcK/?igshid=86py23wuuksg

So the talking point is - “They’ve known each other for awhile, but kept the relationship low key.”  OK. 🙄

[BitterApple]

8 minutes ago, irisheyes said:

So the talking point is - “They’ve known each other for awhile, but kept the relationship low key.”  OK. 🙄

Yeah, they're definitely trying to downplay just how "arranged" this arrangement was. 

[dargosmydaddy]

19 minutes ago, emmawoodhouse said:

20 minutes ago, Churchhoney said:

Could it have been Katey's sister, Lauren, I wonder? She famously went to some Gothard music camp last year. (ugh)

No, it was another Lauren, Andregg.

Yeah, I'm assuming Katey's sister was her maid of honor, and the singer was definitely someone else.

[QuinnInND]

47 minutes ago, Absolom said:

I wish more of the fundie brides would hire a professional hair dresser and put up that straggly hair.  I can not fathom getting married of all things with long hair flopping and stringing around.

You mean her crowning glory? Her beautiful long tresses that God loves? 🤣

[iwantcookies]

1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Jed! professes luv.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOcj9JMCoS/?igshid=wv3hqesxg3qr

🤣🤣🤣 oh Jilly muffin 

[emmawoodhouse]

3 minutes ago, QuinnInND said:

You mean her crowning glory? Her beautiful long tresses that God   Gothard loves? 🤣

FTFY. 🤣

[dargosmydaddy]

A couple more pics. Sadly you can't see the cows.

[Chicklet]

That great passion for the girl you just met 2 3 4  whatever months ago, warms your heart eh?

Edited April 4, 2021 by Chicklet

[satrunrose]

So the aspiring politician and bride are just super low-key people who wanted to keep their mature and fully developed love private. Unnhhhh huuunh...My finance, the Nigerian prince, thinks that sounds totally legit. 

[Churchhoney]

Think of all the delusions Jed! and Katey have swallowed just in those convoluted "vows" they read at the two big stupid ceremonies they experienced in lieu of, you know, getting acquainted with each other. 

Not to mention all the other crap they've probably imbibed in various insanity-laden sessions of being talked at by JB, M, and Dad Nakatsu. Again, in lieu of getting to know anything about themselves and each other. 

 

 

[3 is enough]

So who’s next? There are rumors about Jer and Jana courting.  That leaves James and Jason.  Suddenly it seems that Jim Bob is in a rush to get all of the over 18 kids married off ASAP. I have to wonder why.

[madpsych78]

1 hour ago, emmawoodhouse said:

Katey's mom and brother. Note the sinful short hair.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOc74CMOnQ/?igshid=sbxaxfgce3l4

They seem totally normal looking. And even though her mom is supposedly Mormon, I'll bet she's still more mainstream compared to Katey's father.

[emmawoodhouse]

You can enlarge this one (with the photographer) to get a better look at Katey's dress. Looks like she eschewed cap sleeves by adding a lace overlay.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CNOn7bhsCMN/?igshid=rl04hsw4dcfl

Edited April 4, 2021 by emmawoodhouse

[Lady Whistleup]

Well Kate's family seems more diverse than the usual Duggar bride. She seems to love and value her gay brother. So hopefully she's made of a strong constitution and won't just be a mindless churner of babies.

ETA: I always wonder if it secretly hurts the Duggars' hearts when they see families who actually like each other despite, uh, "sins" like being gay or whatnot. Like that's a level of familial affection they're just not acquainted with.

Edited April 4, 2021 by Lady Whistleup

[MichaelaRae]

I've seen this - this is how Fred and Serena Joy happened. #underhiseye

[iwantcookies]

🤣🤣🤣👍👍👍

[DangerousMinds]

What the hell is a “fam bam?” 

[Zella]

7 minutes ago, MichaelaRae said:

I've seen this - this is how Fred and Serena Joy happened. #underhiseye

Who are they?

[jcbrown]

2 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

What the hell is a “fam bam?” 

I'm not sure I want to know...

[DangerousMinds]

2 minutes ago, jcbrown said:

I'm not sure I want to know...

I do, because for whatever reason it’s super irritating to me!

3 minutes ago, Zella said:

Who are they?

Characters from “The Handmaid’s Tale.”

[iwantcookies]

6 minutes ago, DangerousMinds said:

What the hell is a “fam bam?” 

 

[DangerousMinds]

1 minute ago, iwantcookies said:

 

Yeah, this still seems completely nonsensical and irritating to me. 😂