S05.E08: In the Room

[Jeddah]

26 minutes ago, Bulldog said:

Was I the only one expecting Kevin to announce that they had named his son Nicholas Randall Pearson? 

Since Miguel found Kevin the flight last week, I was really hoping the boy would have Miguel as a first or middle name!

Edited February 17, 2021 by Jeddah

[memememe76]

I loved that scene of Migeul and Rebecca talking about Jack. And the mention of their honeymoon. That is the most married feeling I got from them. I am needing a Miguel backstory! 

[ItCouldBeWorse]

1 hour ago, ams1001 said:

I considered that, but he would have been born in the '40s, right? (I remember we figured out that Jack was born in '44 (which I further remember because that's the year my mom was born).) Their clothes seemed more 60s or 70s.

1 hour ago, KaveDweller said:

Wasn't there a caption at the beginning saying it was 1960-something.

1 hour ago, nilyank said:

1960 something New Mexico

Yup.

1 hour ago, Bulldog said:

Admittedly, its been years since our kids were born, but would they really have women in labor masked up while giving birth?

1 hour ago, DoubleUTeeEff said:

Do women actually have to give birth with masks on?

Now they do, during Covid.  Unless they need an oxygen mask.  It's a challenging time to be pregnant.

1 hour ago, phalange said:

Aww, Haley, Nicholas, and Francis, the new Big Three

I'm guessing "Frances", which is the female version of "Francis", which is traditionally a male name.

1 hour ago, phalange said:

Also caught how Toby’s list of middle names included Fogelman as a nod to Dan Fogelman. 

I thought it said "Foggy" and was quite confused!

 

[chocolatine]

I'm a huge nerd, so when Nasir started telling Esther about Alan Turing two minutes after meeting her, I immediately forgave the intrusion of yet another one-and-done set of characters.

And I had just recently been reading about the Discrete Cosine Transform in a book on numerical analysis, so it was great to see a shout-out to it on a popular TV show. Most of the mathematical concepts I read about/work with don't feature in popular culture. 🤣

As for the main show, I'm glad everything worked out. Kevin would have spiraled if he hadn't made it to the birth, and if Ellie had changed her mind and kept Hailey then the twins' birthday would have always been a bittersweet day for the family. 

Really, it would have been a perfect episode if Kevin hadn't groveled that Randall is the best man he knows.

Edited February 17, 2021 by chocolatine

[bybrandy]

23 minutes ago, Bulldog said:

This.

And this. 

Perish the thought!

 

Was I the only one expecting Kevin to announce that they had named his son Nicholas Randall Pearson? 

I suspect those kids have middle names that will one day be revealed in dramatic fashion with flashbacks/flashforwards/and flash sideways

 

[Snapdragon]

1 hour ago, stefinny said:

My neighbor is pregnant and due in April, and yes, they ask that the women labor and give birth with masks on if possible, or wear a mask in labor for as long as possible.  This is in New York State - I don't know how other states compare, but I would not be surprised if California had similar guidelines.  I would tell them to kick rocks, as there is no way I would labor for very long wearing a mask.

I think this probably depends on the state/hospital.  I know at the beginning of the pandemic, there were a lot of restrictions in place (women not being able to have someone in the hospital with them or if they could have someone, that person wasn't allowed to leave the hospital until the mom and baby checked out) but I gave birth in October and wearing a mask during labor wasn't a thing.  I had to take a COVID test before being admitted and they wanted you to wear a mask in the common areas (hallways, etc) but that was it.  I think technically I was supposed to wear one when hospital staff came into my room afterwards but honestly, I was so out of it that I forgot and the one time I did attempt to grab a mask when a nurse came in, she just said, "Don't worry about it."

[bybrandy]

1 hour ago, txhorns79 said:

Even in Covid-times, the isolation seems extreme.    

Eh, my mom has health issues.  She's not left the house since March.  She's made chocleates, she's made bath bombs, she's made hot chocolate bombs, she's working on her memoirs.  She's eagerly planning a vacation for June of 2022.  But  if she had a cabin in the woods in Pennsylvania she'd be doing all that there.   She is leaving the house Saturday though because she's got her first shot scheduled.

[buttersister]

Bacon Army Power! You got Rose off the vent (and made my favorite TV secret service guy happy), you let a birth mom properly say hello and goodbye to her daughter, you kept Kate calm and who knows what else. 

Thanks, writers. Nasir and Esther were a gorgeous touch and the editing at the end was spot on. I'm getting a little low on tissues, though.

[greeneyedscorpio]

 

 

  3 HOURS AGO, PHALANGE SAID:

>>Also caught how Toby’s list of middle names included Fogelman as a nod to Dan Fogelman. 

 

 

>>I thought it said "Foggy" and was quite confused!

 

 

 

In the left column it said Fogelman  and in the right column it said "Foggy".  It also had Elizabeth on there twice. 

Edited February 17, 2021 by greeneyedscorpio

[bros402]

I laughed so hard at "I communed with my dead birth mother and now I own her house."

[CrystalBlue]

This was a lovely episode, very well done.  One of the best.  I never thought the new couple were Miguel's parents, as Miguel is not Indian and Miguel's background is Puerto Rican, but certainly was surprised at the reveal and tribute to Nasir and Esther.  Some of my tears at the end were because of this!  (I usually don't cry at TIU, so, well done Show!)

Ellie's goodbye to the baby was touching and not overwrought.  So far, so good, although in California birth mothers have 30 days to change their minds, without a special waiver being signed beforehand.  I also liked Ellie's directions to the nurse that the baby go directly to Kate.  Kate was perfect.  I'm totally onboard with Rose being Hayley's middle name (I'm partial, as my real first name is partially Rose).

Nicky!  So thrilled that Kevin and Madison have named their baby boy Nicholas after him.  Frances "Franny" is cute too.

Agree with all the Randall sentiments, but at least it's a start in the right direction.  Beth rocks as usual.

[debraran]

3 hours ago, greeneyedscorpio said:

 

 

  3 HOURS AGO, PHALANGE SAID:

>>Also caught how Toby’s list of middle names included Fogelman as a nod to Dan Fogelman. 

 

 

>>I thought it said "Foggy" and was quite confused!

 

 

 

In the left column it said Fogelman  and in the right column it said "Foggy".  It also had Elizabeth on there twice. 

That is something to look at with glasses, I saw Fog. : )  It reminds of something in the ball park on little house when the kids gave a card to Laura who was teaching and many years later I caught that one signed his real name. (Jon Gilbert)

For the person who asked about "Mike" the inventors son, that was his name.

Today, Nasir is a Professor Emeritus in the Electrical and Computer Engineering department of the University of New Mexico. In 2018, he and his wife Esther released a limited edition book about their lives called Parallel Lives In Curved Space. And as This Is Us showed at the end of the episode, the duo are still married after meeting in 1963 at an international students gathering at their college. The couple has one son, Michael Pariente, who is a high-profile lawyer, and they recently celebrated their 56th wedding anniversary.

 

Edited February 17, 2021 by debraran

[debraran]

3 hours ago, CrystalBlue said:

This was a lovely episode, very well done.  One of the best.  I never thought the new couple were Miguel's parents, as Miguel is not Indian and Miguel's background is Puerto Rican, but certainly was surprised at the reveal and tribute to Nasir and Esther.  Some of my tears at the end were because of this!  (I usually don't cry at TIU, so, well done Show!)

Ellie's goodbye to the baby was touching and not overwrought.  So far, so good, although in California birth mothers have 30 days to change their minds, without a special waiver being signed beforehand.  I also liked Ellie's directions to the nurse that the baby go directly to Kate.  Kate was perfect.  I'm totally onboard with Rose being Hayley's middle name (I'm partial, as my real first name is partially Rose).

Nicky!  So thrilled that Kevin and Madison have named their baby boy Nicholas after him.  Frances "Franny" is cute too.

Agree with all the Randall sentiments, but at least it's a start in the right direction.  Beth rocks as usual.

I think over the years they found it healthier to say goodbye to your baby. I feel it helps to verbally say it and maybe write a letter. Is their adoption open? They never really talked about it.

I loved the interaction with Kate but did it stick out to anyone she said something like she's been waiting for her her whole life and she has Jack at home? She mentioned meeting Toby her dad but not Jack unless I was so tired I missed it. Not a huge thing but it made me think "you have a baby at home". We wont see them together with covid for a while but mentioning them or showing a picture will be nice.

Edited February 17, 2021 by debraran

[Quof]

7 hours ago, Bulldog said:

would they really have women in labor masked up while giving birth?  

Lots of women have delivered while wearing mask throughout labour.  Some celebs have posted "If I can wear a mask for 18 hours of labour, you can wear a mask to go to f#cking Target."

[Haleth]

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thought the random couple were Miguel's parents, but I couldn't reconcile the date.  Surely he was born before 1963 (the caption said 1963 when they met), no way he is that much younger than Rebecca.  The writers intended for us to think that since after a scene with Nasir and Esther they immediately went to a shot of Miguel.  Every time.  It was sweet finding out who they are, but don't keep throwing random people at us, show.

I feel for Rebecca.  My daughter is going to give birth to our first grandchild soon, but we won't be able to see them for two weeks after the birth.  Damn covid.  (But how funny is it that they are hiding Mandy's own pregnancy under ponchos?)

The twist this week was that Hailey's birth mother did not change her mind.

Not sure I like the TSA giving special privileges to a movie star.  No matter how much he wore them down with speechifying.

1 hour ago, debraran said:

I loved the interaction with Kate but did it stick out to anyone she said something like she's been waiting for her her whole life and she has Jack at home? She mentioned meeting Toby her dad but not Jack unless I was so tired I missed it. Not a huge thing but it made me think "you have a baby at home". We wont see them together with covid for a while but mentioning them or showing a picture will be nice.

Yeah, I thought it was odd that she said nothing about her big brother at home.

7 hours ago, ProudMary said:

The actor is Michael O'Neill, who I immediately recognized as Secret Service Agent Ron Butterfield from The West Wing

Was it?  I loved him on TWW!  Glad Rose seems to be ok.

[MissLucas]

As someone who hands out miniature wooden piglets to everybody she meets during the first week of a new year (damn, not this year) I was thoroughly confused by the whole conversation between Toby and the old man. Aren't pigs considered lucky charms in the US? (I'm not Austrian but close enough - maybe that's a central European thing?) I did chuckle a bit at Toby ending on the receiving end of another Pearson soliloquy yet delivered by a stranger.

I loved how we got around the tired trope of birth mother changing her mind. I hope they stick with it and that there's no further drama down the road. Though I would like to see Kate and Toby check in with her at some point to let her know Haley Rose is doing okay (well assuming she would like them to do that).

And since I felt for Miguel having to stay with his wife in that cabin full of relics to Saint Jack I was happy to hear Rebecca acknowledge the burden he's carrying. 

Randall being Madison's doula with the occasional assist from Beth was great. Too bad the writers had to ruin it with that lopsided apology. 

Wonderful thank you note to someone who made life during pandemic somewhat easier. But did the term 'geek' exist in the 60's?

 

Edited February 17, 2021 by MissLucas

[Ohiopirate02]

2 hours ago, Haleth said:

I feel for Rebecca.  My daughter is going to give birth to our first grandchild soon, but we won't be able to see them for two weeks after the birth.  Damn covid.  (But how funny is it that they are hiding Mandy's own pregnancy under ponchos?)

 

Ponchos, a bag of groceries, sitting down, and close up shots to avoid her abdomen.  I expect next week to see her hiding behind a potted plant.

[nilyank]

3 minutes ago, Ohiopirate02 said:

Ponchos, a bag of groceries, sitting down, and close up shots to avoid her abdomen.  I expect next week to see her hiding behind a potted plant.

I expect a flashback when Rebecca was pregnant with the triplets and then hiding behind a blanket in the present scenes.

[Ohiopirate02]

Toby's list and him agonizing over the all-important middle name cracked me up.  Then he goes with the ultimate workhorse of a female middle name--Rose.  Rose works with like 95% of female names.  I know the show gave him a reason for it, but it truly is a rather uninspired choice, and I say this as someone whose middle name is Rose.

[Boo Boo]

It's so ridiculous to me that a mom of a newborn hands their baby off to a woman whose mobility is surely impacted by her obesity.   If it isn't now, it will be in the future.

I guess if they want us to believe the New Big Three was born in one night, I should suspend disbelief that a pregnant woman is going to select a morbidly obese woman with a blind child to be the mother of her baby.

Also, the woman playing Esther does a terrible accent making me happy that the story was a one and done.

[ams1001]

10 hours ago, ProudMary said:

The actor is Michael O'Neill, who I immediately recognized as Secret Service Agent Ron Butterfield from The West Wing. His name is in the episode's full cast list on IMDb, but without a character name. I don't think he and Toby ever exchanged names in the episode.

I had to take a phone call during the episode. Can someone tell me what the birth mother said to her newborn after she asked Kate to leave the room? Was there a tense conversation between birth mother and Kate afterward? Also, I missed the introduction of Kate's baby's name. From reading other posts above, i see that it's Haley but how did they work it into the dialog? Did Toby already know the name Kate had chosen? I was certain that Toby would choose Rose for her middle name. 

IMDB is weird sometimes. Last week when I first looked, it listed Josh Malina but the character name was blank, and a little later it had been updated to car crash victim. 

Birth mom said something to the effect of "so you're the one I gave up cold cuts for 9 months for" and joked that it was a big deal because she lives for pastrami (or something like that). Paraphrasing: When I realized you were real, I knew I had to take care of you, even if you were never meant to be mine, and told her Kate was her mother and then we see a nurse bring her to Kate in the other room. I don't know if we knew the name was Hailey (except from the flash forward) but they reveal the full name when Toby sees her on his phone for the first time and says "Hi, Hailey Rose."

1 hour ago, MissLucas said:

Wonderful thank you note to someone who made life during pandemic somewhat easier. But did the term 'geek' exist in the 60's?

The word itself has been around for a while: "Geek was originally an early 20th-century term for a carnival worker who was so unskilled that the only thing the worker could do at the carnival to entice an audience was to bite off the heads of live animals. Essentially, a geek was a socially undesirable person who lacked any skill or ability." (from brittanica.com) According to Merriam-Webster, "geek became synonymous with 'nerd' in the 1950s."

[NeenerNeener]

I think the meet cute year for Esther and Nasir was 1963.

[txhorns79]

I'm interested to see if it becomes an issue that Kevin and Kate have a new Big Three that entirely excludes Randall and his children.   

4 hours ago, debraran said:

Is their adoption open? They never really talked about it.

I feel like they must be dealing with the most hands off adoption agency possible.  Not that I need to see all the logistics of adoption, and I get that procedures are different because of Covid, but it feels this is a period where the agency would be having the most involvement, i.e. they would have someone there (or at least on the phone) to essentially keep everyone in check given how emotional this moment is for both the birth mom and Kate. 

[GeorgiaRai]

As the mother of my own Hayley Rose (age 29), I gave this episode two thumbs up!

[ElectricBoogaloo]

As soon as I saw that we were in New Mexico in 1963, the first thing I thought was great, so we're going to get a flashback about people who we've never seen or heard of before. But I cracked up at Nasir describing the baby thusly: "He's perfect. He looks just like me." At least this week's "who the hell are these people?" story was someone I could appreciate, unlike when we get the backstories on random extras.

I really felt for Miguel. I know Kevin, Madison, Kate, and Toby were all stressed about their respective impending births, but poor Miguel was at the cabin trying to keep Rebecca entertained/distracted and she insisted on sitting in a dark corner in case it had better reception.

I get that she wanted an update but this is one of those cases where there is actually NOTHING you can do but wait. Being a stress ball in the mean time accomplishes nothing. Miguel had the right idea suggesting board games and watching tv to distract her but she was so focused on staring at her phone in case she got enough signal to receive a text or phone call that she snapped at him. I was glad when she acknowledged what a weight it was for him to bear Jack's death differently than everyone else does.

Ha, I was imagining how Randall would have reacted if he had been at the cabin when Rebecca asked for a cocktail. I'm pretty sure there would have been a lecture involving mixing her meds with alcohol.

Saint Jack couldn't tolerate Rebecca making comments about the kids that weren't singing their praises about how amazing and perfect and talented they were. God forbid she admit that she can't stand listening to them bicker nonstop.

I had to laugh when Toby got an abbreviated version of a Pearson speech from the cranky old man in the parking lot.

Edited February 17, 2021 by ElectricBoogaloo

[cardigirl]

I don't know why Rose's husband couldn't have said, "Excuse me, I see that you are all set up and everything, could I ask a huge favor of you and have you move so I can have that spot? It's numbered a lucky number and my wife is so sick and I've been sitting in it every day and night while she's on the ventilator. It would mean a lot to both of us."  I'm sure Toby would have moved for that.  But no, the guy has to come across as a jackass first so we then get the backstory and Toby backing down.  There really was no need for Rose's husband to act like that, tired/stressed/scared as he was. That part of the episode bothered me.  The rest was pretty great. 

Edited February 17, 2021 by cardigirl

[cameron]

58 minutes ago, ams1001 said:

IMDB is weird sometimes. Last week when I first looked, it listed Josh Malina but the character name was blank, and a little later it had been updated to car crash victim. 

Birth mom said something to the effect of "so you're the one I gave up cold cuts for 9 months for" and joked that it was a big deal because she lives for pastrami (or something like that). Paraphrasing: When I realized you were real, I knew I had to take care of you, even if you were never meant to be mine, and told her Kate was her mother and then we see a nurse bring her to Kate in the other room. I don't know if we knew the name was Hailey (except from the flash forward) but they reveal the full name when Toby sees her on his phone for the first time and says "Hi, Hailey Rose."

The word itself has been around for a while: "Geek was originally an early 20th-century term for a carnival worker who was so unskilled that the only thing the worker could do at the carnival to entice an audience was to bite off the heads of live animals. Essentially, a geek was a socially undesirable person who lacked any skill or ability." (from brittanica.com) According to Merriam-Webster, "geek became synonymous with 'nerd' in the 1950s."

I always associate the term "nerd" with someone who is overly studious in Math, black horn rimmed glasses, pocket protector and slide rule rules with them in the 60's.

[Madding crowd]

1 hour ago, Boo Boo said:

It's so ridiculous to me that a mom of a newborn hands their baby off to a woman whose mobility is surely impacted by her obesity.   If it isn't now, it will be in the future.

I guess if they want us to believe the New Big Three was born in one night, I should suspend disbelief that a pregnant woman is going to select a morbidly obese woman with a blind child to be the mother of her baby.

Also, the woman playing Esther does a terrible accent making me happy that the story was a one and done.

We have not seen anything to suggest Kate is an unfit mother or not mobile. People in wheelchairs can be mothers too if you are talking about mobility. And having a blind child is not a negative against a parent. Not everyone is prejudiced against fat people. 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

12 hours ago, ams1001 said:

I considered that, but he would have been born in the '40s, right? (I remember we figured out that Jack was born in '44 (which I further remember because that's the year my mom was born).) Their clothes seemed more 60s or 70s.

 

12 hours ago, KaveDweller said:

Wasn't there a caption at the beginning saying it was 1960-something. That was how I knew it wasn't Miguel's parents, but I thought it was odd, since we never get year captions on this show. It was a little weird, but the guy who made video chat possible deserves some recognition, so good for the show on that.

 

12 hours ago, nilyank said:

1960 something New Mexico

 

39 minutes ago, NeenerNeener said:

I think the meet cute year for Esther and Nasir was 1963.

It was Albuquerque, New Mexico, in 1963.

1 hour ago, ams1001 said:

The word itself has been around for a while: "Geek was originally an early 20th-century term for a carnival worker who was so unskilled that the only thing the worker could do at the carnival to entice an audience was to bite off the heads of live animals. Essentially, a geek was a socially undesirable person who lacked any skill or ability." (from brittanica.com) According to Merriam-Webster, "geek became synonymous with 'nerd' in the 1950s."

I first learned the origin of the word geek (which I had always associated with nerdy stuff) when I read Geek Love in college!

[ams1001]

18 minutes ago, ElectricBoogaloo said:

I first learned the origin of the word geek (which I had always associated with nerdy stuff) when I read Geek Love in college!

lol...I had to buy that for a class but then we never got to it for some reason; I graduated in 1997 and I still haven't read it.

[Jeddah]

1 hour ago, txhorns79 said:

I feel like they must be dealing with the most hands off adoption agency possible.  Not that I need to see all the logistics of adoption, and I get that procedures are different because of Covid, but it feels this is a period where the agency would be having the most involvement, i.e. they would have someone there (or at least on the phone) to essentially keep everyone in check given how emotional this moment is for both the birth mom and Kate. 

Deja’s adoption was definitely not the norm for foster care either. And then there’s Randall’s adoption! This show seems to think adoptions are fairly easy and take no time at all. 
 

26 minutes ago, Madding crowd said:

We have not seen anything to suggest Kate is an unfit mother or not mobile. People in wheelchairs can be mothers too if you are talking about mobility. And having a blind child is not a negative against a parent. Not everyone is prejudiced against fat people. 

I feel like we have seen evidence that Toby and Kate aren’t good parents. Toby was mentally and physically checked out for a lot of Jack’s first year of life. Kate and Toby have a pretty unstable marriage. Kate is really entitled and has a host of emotional issues. We never see them interacting with Jack. I really wish we could have gotten more about the birth mom’s thought process here. They like Buffy too! Is that really enough to go on? She liked that they make up easily after arguments, but seemed to ignore the fact that the fight was about them not meeting the basic needs of their special needs child. They leave their kid in dirty diapers, call him gross, and don’t leave supplies for the babysitter. So they’ll be better parents? For me it’s not about Kate’s weight. It’s about Toby and Kate being crappy people in general. 

I must be the only person who didn’t like the Nasir Ahmed story. The episode was about being there for your family, and it showed that he wasn’t. His wife wanted one day of him being home to have dinner with his kid, and he couldn’t manage that. That’s inspiring? Maybe it wasn’t like that in real life, but that’s what they showed in the episode. Plenty of hard-working people who are doing important work still manage to eat dinner with their kids sometimes.

Edited February 17, 2021 by Jeddah

[Madding crowd]

Dirty diapers are gross and we don’t see any parents spend time with babies on TV. I am willing to bet we rarely see Kevin’s babies after this episode. I think Kate and Toby are good people who are not perfect, and I have no issue with them as parents. The post I responded to specifically mentioned Kate’s weight and said no one would give their baby to a morbidly obese person. Love is love.

[Lady Calypso]

This was a very nice episode. It was nice to see a new Big Three emerge, but also not forget about the other kids in the Pearson's lives. It's more that these three were born on the same night and I thought it was cute that Kate's daughter and Kevin's twins were born on the same night. 

No surprise Kevin found a way onto that plane, but it WAS nice that he didn't miss the birth and I think this episode had so many good moments that we needed to see. Naming his son after Nicky was...a choice. I was hoping for him to name his daughter, since Rebecca is now the only adult family member who doesn't have a child named after her. But Madison choosing one of the twins' names was nice. Frances is a choice, but I like how they're shortening it to Franny. It's different, that's for sure, but I'm hoping that this is leading to a Madison backstory and why her grandmother's name is so significant to her.

Randall was in top form this episode. His unconditional support for Madison, coupled with him telling an embarrassing Kevin story, was a great way to handle his road to reconciling with Kevin fully.

I was also worried about Ellie deciding to keep her baby. Thank goodness the show avoided the cliche, and her goodbye to Hailey before handing her off to Kate was well done. 

Hailey Rose Damon? I like the flow of the name, even if the reason for the middle name was almost Pearson-esque.

The Nasir story was...weird. I feel like they should have revealed it much earlier than the last 30 seconds of the episode because I found myself not caring, especially when I knew the "hints" of it being Miguel's parents were a fakeout. Yes, I took note of the transitions going always to Miguel after those scenes. It was touching, if they didn't try to hide it throughout the episode. 

10 minutes ago, Jeddah said:

I feel like we have seen evidence that Toby and Kate aren’t good parents. Toby was mentally and physically checked out for a lot of Jack’s first year of life. Kate and Toby have a pretty unstable marriage. Kate is really entitled and has a host of emotional issues. We never see them interacting with Jack. I really wish we could have gotten more about the birth mom’s thought process here. They like Buffy too! Is that really enough to go on? She liked that they make up easily after arguments, but seemed to ignore the fact that the fight was about them not meeting the basic needs of their special needs child. They leave their blind kid in dirty diapers, call him gross, and don’t leave supplies for the babysitter. So they’ll be better parents? For me it’s not about Kate’s weight. It’s about Toby and Kate being crappy people in general.

I feel like Toby and Kate are fine parents. Have they struggled? Absolutely. But they're not unfit parents in any sense. Kate/Toby have had fights, sure, but that's what couples do. Kate has always been very attentive and caring toward Jack. Toby had issues with connecting with Jack, sure, but he pulled his weight once he got passed those issues. Toby and Kate have never been negligent parents. They don't leave Jack in dirty diapers like neglectful parents. The diaper situation was more about when to buy diapers, than not changing Jack. They struggle, but their love for their son is quite clear. So I don't see how they are seen as awful parents. New parents can struggle. It's an adjustment, especially with a special needs child, and they've made mistakes, but they have always been there for their son, which is the number one thing to do for your child. And also, everyone has their set of issues. No parent is perfect. Kate has been working through her emotional issues and has been a lot better SINCE having Jack, actually. 

I have seen zero evidence that Toby and Kate are bad parents. 

[Boo Boo]

1 hour ago, Madding crowd said:

We have not seen anything to suggest Kate is an unfit mother or not mobile. People in wheelchairs can be mothers too if you are talking about mobility. And having a blind child is not a negative against a parent. Not everyone is prejudiced against fat people. 

This isn't about being "prejudiced against fat people" it's about a birth mom CHOOSING a birth parent out of a sea of likely more healthy people.  Being morbidly obese as Kate is, her life expectancy may be much shorter than someone who isn't morbidly obese.   The actress herself has said "I want to have a fit, healthy body. I don't want to be limited by anything."

Yes, there are mothers with health issues, mobility issues, etc., but it's hard to believe that a birth mom is going to choose an adoptive mom with a known health issues that could shorten her life expectancy.  Not to mention the same mom that has a blind child would require much more attention to ensure their needs are met.  

This storyline is as unrealistic as the Pearsons losing the 3rd triplet and somehow are able to bring home Randall with zero issues.   

Edited February 17, 2021 by Boo Boo

[Jeddah]

3 minutes ago, Lady Calypso said:

They don't leave Jack in dirty diapers like neglectful parents.

Yes, they do. Their argument ended with them laughing about how he likes being in dirty diapers because he’s gross. So leaving him dirty diapers wasn’t a one off. It’s a regular thing that they think is funny.

There are far more prospective parents out there than infants to adopt. Why did the birth mom pick them over everyone else? That’s what I wish they had shown.

[Boo Boo]

5 minutes ago, Jeddah said:

Yes, they do. Their argument ended with them laughing about how he likes being in dirty diapers because he’s gross. So leaving him dirty diapers wasn’t a one off. It’s a regular thing that they think is funny.

There are far more prospective parents out there than infants to adopt. Why did the birth mom pick them over everyone else? That’s what I wish they had shown.

Exactly.  That's why it's so hard for me to believe.  But then again, the show started with an unrealistic premise that a couple that loses one of the triplets has zero issue quickly adopting another baby. 

[cardigirl]

In no way whatsoever did I think that Nasir and Esther were Miguel's parents. Too young for one thing, but I wasn't even looking for that connection. I was intrigued by them, for sure, though. I like that the show tries to show how our lives may be touched by people we may never know. Having everything completely explained can be boring. And Nasir and Esther's story was so beautifully shown too. Nicely done!

 

 

[ElectricBoogaloo]

Welcome to the world, Hailey Rose:

 

[Blakeston]

5 minutes ago, Jeddah said:

There are far more prospective parents out there than infants to adopt. Why did the birth mom pick them over everyone else? That’s what I wish they had shown.

We were supposed to believe that the birth mom chose them because she and Kate have a lot in common, pop-culture-wise.

I have to agree with those who say that everything working out the way it did was hard to swallow.

It's unusual for anyone, aside from celebrities, to be chosen for adoption by a birth mother as quickly as Kate and Toby were. I know it's happened in real life, but it's got to be rare.

Then add in that this was the perfect birth mother. She knew from the get-go that she wanted to give the baby away, and she never wavered. She had a stable life, and no apparent health problems, and she was knocked up by some guy who's completely out of the picture and won't interfere, and she'd already given birth before, so she knew what she was getting into! She was a unicorn among birth mothers.

That alone is extraordinary luck on Kate and Toby's part.

Add in that Kate is super-obese (the level above morbidly obese) in a society where prejudice against fat people runs deep. And that it's common knowledge that someone as heavy as Kate is disproportionately likely to end up with debilitating health problems. And that Toby has depression issues and heart problems. And that Kate and Toby got into an argument in front of the birth mother immediately after meeting her, and she chose them anyway!

Suspending disbelief on this is pretty hard, even on a show where lots of crazy things happen.

[cardigirl]

12 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

This isn't about being "prejudiced against fat people" it's about a birth mom CHOOSING a healthy birth parent out of a sea of more healthy people.  Being morbidly obese as Kate is, her life expectancy may be much shorter than someone who isn't morbidly obese.   

Yes, there are mothers with health issues, mobility issues, etc., but it's hard to believe that a birth mom is going to choose an adoptive mom with a known health issues that could shorten her life expectancy.  Not to mention a blind child would require much more attention to ensure their needs are met.  

This storyline is as unrealistic as the Pearsons losing the 3rd triplet and somehow are able to bring home Randall with zero issues.   

Nothing is guaranteed, and one could choose the healthiest-looking person on the planet, and they could get hit by a bus the next day and die.

I think she chose them because they seem to have a great relationship and the ability to deal with problems in life. In the case of being able to offer the most to her baby, they seemed to be able to give her child most of what she wanted, love and acceptance, and security. 

 

[ams1001]

3 minutes ago, Blakeston said:

And that Kate and Toby got into an argument in front of the birth mother immediately after meeting her, and she chose them anyway!

Plus it was a really stupid argument and they didn't have the sense to save it for later.

 

[tennisgurl]

As much as I joke about a lot of the "so who the hell are these people" flashbacks to random people who may or may not actually be a part of the plot going forward, I did like where the story ended up, especially as the Pearsons were all meeting the babies through video calling. As cheesy as it often is, I like the theme of how interconnected we all are and how your life can be changed by someone who you will never actually know. At least this one was thematically relevant and told an interesting true story about a guy who really did do something important, its not the life story of the guy who cut Jack off in traffic one time or something. 

"Well when I ran for city council..." 

"Tell her something interesting." 

Beth speaks for all of us! 

[Boo Boo]

30 minutes ago, cardigirl said:

Nothing is guaranteed, and one could choose the healthiest-looking person on the planet, and they could get hit by a bus the next day and die.

I think she chose them because they seem to have a great relationship and the ability to deal with problems in life. In the case of being able to offer the most to her baby, they seemed to be able to give her child most of what she wanted, love and acceptance, and security. 

 

Yes, nothing is guaranteed, but Kate's obesity is something you know and can make an informed decision on whether you want to roll the dice with a known health issue.  

Again, this is my problem with the show.  Adoption isn't easy.  I know that because my daughter is adopted.  For the Pearsons to so easily adopt Randall after suffering loss of a triplet and then for Toby and Kate to so easily be chosen as adoptive parents (even if you do it privately) defies credulity.

But then again, every storyline defies credulity pretty much.  I mean, if I'm Madison I'm thinking "WHAT? YOU QUIT YOUR JOB? DURING A PANDEMIC AND WE HAVE TWINS?"  Sure, I guess he's wealthy from acting, but there area  lot of out of work actors and now he's pissed off YET another director.

I probably should just stick with reality TV -- which might be more realistic. 🙂  

Edited February 17, 2021 by Boo Boo

[cardigirl]

15 minutes ago, Boo Boo said:

Yes, nothing is guaranteed, but Kate's obesity is something you know and can make an informed decision on whether you want to roll the dice with a known health issue.  

Again, this is my problem with the show.  Adoption isn't easy.  I know that because my daughter is adopted.  For the Pearsons to so easily adopt Randall after suffering loss of a triplet and then for Toby and Kate to so easily be chosen as adoptive parents (even if you do it privately) defies credulity.

But then again, every storyline defies credulity pretty much.  I mean, if I'm Madison I'm thinking "WHAT? YOU QUIT YOUR JOB? DURING A PANDEMIC AND WE HAVE TWINS?"  Sure, I guess he's wealthy from acting, but there area  lot of out of work actors and now he's pissed off YET another director.

I probably should just stick with reality TV -- which might be more realistic. 🙂  

I agree that television often misrepresents the adoption process. It's either way too easy or way too hard.

I laugh at reality tv being real. 😄  I'm just saying that trying to control life make the best choice based on appearances may not always work out. Agreed that someone like Kate might get passed over because of her weight in real life, but also, someone like Kate in real life might also be able to care for an infant, keep a home, take care of a family, and be healthy. Many women are healthy until they are not, when cancer or some other chronic disease crops up. 

But it is a TeeVee show.  I'm going with it for now. 

[Ana88]

What a beautiful episode! (another one) 

I really love how this show shows us the other side of whatever mood strangers seem to be in and the importance of always being open and not judge right away. The person who cuts you off in store or traffic may be on the way home to a dying family member with medicine, you just never ever know. If you're in a good position in life always being nice and handing a helping hand just goes such a long way. 

I also thought it was Miguel's parents and got pretty annoyed! More strangers!?! Whats the point in this huge special episode, we need all the screen time we can get with the big 3 and not these strangers. Boy was I humbled in the end.. So beautiful to put that in there in these times!! Just imagine the world if Covid had hit 30 years ago! 

I love the men in this episode. Love that it was Jack feeling sentimental about the kids growing up. It usually always is the mom in TV shows. It's so good to see how dads can feel the same and in this case even more than the mom.

 Holy cow that needle... And in the back.. God help me when I give birth one day.. 

HAHA "Give her something interesting!" I haven't laughed out loud by myself for a while! I love Beth!! 

Also YAY little 3 flashbacks! SO cute, I hope we get to see more from that time! 

Seriously I know it's been said many times before but the make up department for this show is INCREDIBLE! And also Mandy! She literally depicts "older mom" PERFECTLY and looks the part as well! So insanely talented makeup people! 

CANT WAIT FOR THE FUTURE! 

Edited February 17, 2021 by Ana88

[Boo Boo]

19 minutes ago, cardigirl said:

I agree that television often misrepresents the adoption process. It's either way too easy or way too hard.

I laugh at reality tv being real. 😄  I'm just saying that trying to control life make the best choice based on appearances may not always work out. Agreed that someone like Kate might get passed over because of her weight in real life, but also, someone like Kate in real life might also be able to care for an infant, keep a home, take care of a family, and be healthy. Many women are healthy until they are not, when cancer or some other chronic disease crops up. 

But it is a TeeVee show.  I'm going with it for now. 

I know, I should really just enjoy storylines for what they are!  I just feel like sometimes they are in Soap Opera category with the dead being undead, job changes, etc.  That said, I always look forward to the show!  And I am definitely looking forward to Jack's alcoholism explored.

Edited February 17, 2021 by Boo Boo

[doodlebug]

13 hours ago, stefinny said:

My neighbor is pregnant and due in April, and yes, they ask that the women labor and give birth with masks on if possible, or wear a mask in labor for as long as possible.  This is in New York State - I don't know how other states compare, but I would not be surprised if California had similar guidelines.  I would tell them to kick rocks, as there is no way I would labor for very long wearing a mask.

Yes, the general recommendation is that all women in labor wear masks throughout the process.  They usually wear those blue paper surgeon's masks which are easier to breathe through than cloth.  The reason is that women in labor do a lot of panting and heavy breathing through contractions which puts a lot of droplets into the air.  Especially for labor and delivery nurses, who are usually right at the patient's head, especially during pushing and birth; this presents a big risk even if the nurse wears a mask and face shield.  All women in labor have a rapid COVID test when they're admitted and those who are positive have to wear N95 masks which are much less comfortable.

Actually, all hospitalized patients are given masks and asked to put them on whenever anyone enters their room, if possible.

[Ana88]

11 hours ago, greeneyedscorpio said:

 

 

  3 HOURS AGO, PHALANGE SAID:

>>Also caught how Toby’s list of middle names included Fogelman as a nod to Dan Fogelman. 

 

 

>>I thought it said "Foggy" and was quite confused!

 

 

 

In the left column it said Fogelman  and in the right column it said "Foggy".  It also had Elizabeth on there twice. 

Hahah I actually paused the show to have a better look at those names! Thought it was extremely weird how it said "Fogelman" then I remembered once I read in here lol.. Too funny these directors! 

[tennisgurl]

Oh yeah, I caught how when Kevin and Randall finally got to talk, Kevin had this whole long apology about how Randall is the best person ever and he said all of these awful things and he is so so sorry, while Randall just says that they both said some bad things and that later Randall will allow Kevin to hear more about how much it sucks to be Randall and what a martyr he is. How big of him to admit some minor fault in all of this, which all started when he went against his own mothers wishes about her own health.  But since it seems the feud is almost ever, and Randall did reach out first, and it was really sweet how he and Beth were there for Madison, I can let that bit of St. Randall crap slide, I just want everyone to be cool with each other again. Kevin and Randall were in such a good place before this fight, I am so ready for them to start working to get back to a good place. 

For a second I totally thought that the birth mother was going to take the baby back, but I am really glad we skated past that melodrama and that Kate and Kevin are going to have their kid after the birth mom gave her a nice goodbye. Then maybe one day little Haylee Rose can seek out her birth mom who will have died by then and maybe commune with her ghost in a local swimming pool to get closure or something after hearing her whole life story from her ex boyfriend who then gives her her moms old Chevy Impala. The whole adoption thing seems really weird in general, Kate and Kevin getting a kid so easily really pushes suspension of disbelief, even by this shows standards, I have always been under the impression that it was a lot harder and more time consuming, but what do I know, I don't even have any Pearson speeches to give to potential bio parents.

I get that the old guy in his van and was going through some bad stuff, so I understand not being in a patient mood, but why not just explain what was going on right away to Toby instead of just telling him to move? Everyone in the TIU verse have some big dramatic reason for everything they do, usually tying into some long romantic/family story, so he should know that Toby would understand. Its always something, but I am glad that his wife made it, wins for everyone tonight. The "bacon army" line was cute too. Rose is the middle name I came up with for my little sister when I was six, so I approve. 

I thought that the couple might be Miguel's parents for a minute, the husband even looks a bit like him, but then realized that 1963 was too late for Miguel not to be born yet. Then I thought they might be the parents of the doctor who delivered the babies, or be connected to the guy who Kevin saved last week, I certainly did not see who they actually were coming. 

Francis is not a name I would have guessed for Madison and Kevin, but Frannie is cute and its nice that Madison got to name one of the babies after one of her relatives. I wonder if we will get more Madison backstory next, especially now that she has birthed the next generation of Pearson's, maybe find out why she doesn't talk to her family? Kevin naming one of his sons after Nicky was really sweet, Nicky looked so shocked and touched when Kevin called him. 

Good thing it was Miguel and not Randall that was with Rebecca, no way would he have made her a cocktail. Then he would have pulled out a really long and condescending power point presentation out on the dangers of mixing alcohol and meds until everyone has passed out due to sheer boredom. The talk they had about Jack was really nice, it must be hard for Miguel sometimes to talk about Jack even though they were best friends for years. 

[cardigirl]

3 minutes ago, Ana88 said:

Hahah I actually paused the show to have a better look at those names! Thought it was extremely weird how it said "Fogelman" then I remembered once I read in here lol.. Too funny these directors! 

It also had Olin on it for Ken Olin.