S13.E03: Ten Ten, Twenty Twenty

[TexasGal]

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Porsha returns home from her second arrest in Kentucky and also reveals that she and Dennis have called it quits. Kenya offers Cynthia marital advice and juggles her fast track friendship with LaToya. Drew and Ralph agree to go to marriage counseling, while Cynthia and Mike disagree over when to host their dream wedding.

Airdate: 12.20.2020

Some reminders:

• Keep all comments to the events of this episode only.  Any current events are spoilers.
• Discussion of BLM or other hot topic social issues are ok, but as always remember to be civil to each other.  
• Discussion of politics or any political figures who are not specifically referenced in the episode are not on topic, and are against our politics policy.

[Keywestclubkid]

Kenya girl stop trying to cause conflict between your new “friend” and drew the new housewife .. you looking fucking petty .. worry about your own shit 

[bosawks]

Kandi would “pre-nup” every single interaction she has if she could.

 

Edited December 21, 2020 by bosawks

[Axie]

I'd rather skip straight to the Potomac reunion.  This is boring the crap out of me.  

Edited December 21, 2020 by Axie

[Stats Queen]

11 minutes ago, Keywestclubkid said:

Kenya girl stop trying to cause conflict between your new “friend” and drew the new housewife .. you looking fucking petty .. worry about your own shit 

I was about to post something similar but not as well put.

This scene with Kenya and LaToya(?) is so contrived.

Cynthia really is vapid- and I rooted for her for a long time, her focus on a big wedding in the middle of a world-wide pandemic over a marriage is just disturbing- Cynthia, you are not a high school student who missed all the important milestones in their senior year. You are a grown ass woman and both you and Mike have been married before. - actions like hers is what makes high risk people like me hesitant to go anywhere where more than 8 people are close together.

Nothing is reall about this show anymore, except maybe Porsha’s activism.

[Keywestclubkid]

I hate Ralph UGH

[Axie]

I'm not going to be able to take a season of this ahole Ralph.  Seriously.  Why is he getting so much airtime?

[bosawks]

I dislike Ralph so much that if they imported Monique from Potomac just to smack the shit out of him I would look the other way....

[Keywestclubkid]

I swear to god I am not gonna be able to take a full freaking season of her and her husband fighting ...

[Keywestclubkid]

Gross Cynthia YOU ARE GROSS right now 

[nexxie]

This show makes me feel a lot better about gaining five pounds during the pandemic.

[TexasGal]

16 minutes ago, Stats Queen said:

 

Cynthia really is vapid- and I rooted for her for a long time, her focus on a big wedding in the middle of a world-wide pandemic over a marriage is just disturbing- Cynthia, you are not a high school student who missed all the important milestones in their senior year. You are a grown ass woman and both you and Mike have been married before. - actions like hers is what makes high risk people like me hesitant to go anywhere where more than 8 people are close together.

For real.  You are wearing earrings with the date.  Have a small wedding at your house and have a big party when we are allowed* to have big parties.  *I gotta say, I’ve really learned which of my friends are actually assholes based on pics of Thanksgiving and now Christmas events they are attending.  Keep your asses home!!!

 

[bosawks]

This episode is making me think that the issues in Cynthia’s previous marriage to that shriveled up ballsac aka Peter might not have been all his fault.

Like 99% was but not all....

[nexxie]

20 minutes ago, Stats Queen said:

I was about to post something similar but not as well put.

This scene with Kenya and LaToya(?) is so contrived.

Cynthia really is vapid- and I rooted for her for a long time, her focus on a big wedding in the middle of a world-wide pandemic over a marriage is just disturbing- Cynthia, you are not a high school student who missed all the important milestones in their senior year. You are a grown ass woman and both you and Mike have been married before. - actions like hers is what makes high risk people like me hesitant to go anywhere where more than 8 people are close together.

Nothing is reall about this show anymore, except maybe Porsha’s activism.

I’ve been on Cynthia’s side a lot too, but she is really showing her big ol’ ass about this wedding!

[Stats Queen]

Cynthia doesn’t want a fake wedding? - seriously you are 51cent (maybe 52cent) and have been married before. - do you want a real wedding and a fake marriage, or a real marriage that lasts beyond one special day? You had a huge first wedding to Papa Smurf and the dinosaurs. It is stunning to me that she is focused one day with a bunch of non masked people vs. a life time with the man she is committing to.

I got remarried when I was 30, and I was more happy about being married to a good guy than to my venue.

My niece got married in June (was supposed to happen in April). My brother died suddenly in September of 2019, so already her dad wouldn’t be at the wedding. My wonderful sister in law (her mom) found out she had stage four gallbladder cancer in December of 2019.  She made it to her daughters wedding but died two months later. So many family and friends couldn’t be at her wedding, because traveling was too risky. I, like most, missed her wedding and I couldn’t got to her mom’s funeral two months later.

My poor niece, what a crappy 20 months she’s been thru. She and her husband are in their early 30’s but they never lost sight of what really mattered.

[LaurelleJ]

Goodness, is every scene with Drew and Ralph going to be them having an argument? No thank you

Loved the fun group of Porsha, Lauren, Tanya, and Falynn. That's why I watch this show, not for all the arguing. 

I fell out watching Kenya fake fall on Kandi's hill trying to get paid.

I'm a Mike and Cynthia supporter, but in this episode I was a Mike supporter only. She was not listening to him, and made it seem like the wedding was more important than marrying him that day. To him, that day is the best thing, and they can have the party later. I would think after the disaster that was Peter, she would be focused on the marriage and not the wedding. I love the fact that he seems to get on famously with her family. I wish the best for them. 

[Axie]

That was dreadful and an hour I'll never get back.  I don't remember any other husband getting as much airtime as Ralph.  They should stick with that formula.

[Momager]

None of these women are likeable. They come across as vapid and shallow (save for Porsha - but that’s a very recent development). 

[Marley]

Yea if Drew and Ralph did buy that house then I doubt her name is on the title. What a garbage marriage that is...why are they even married. Ralph is a douche and Drew is an idiot.

Another idiot is Cynthia. All she cares about is the party. Not even a Mike fan but he was right.

[howiveaddict]

I am so proud of Porsha, like she was one of my own.

Cynthia, do you want a wedding or a marriage?  I know of someone who's parent died of covid after attending their child's big wedding.  And I think the mother was who pushed them to go ahead and have the wedding.

[Adgirl]

Drew and Ralph make me very uncomfortable. He's so hostile.

[dosodog]

I would like to see more of Falyn and her life.  From the brief time I saw, her house looked amazing, she looked high maintenance, yet fun, she hands out gifts and her husband isn't Ralph.

 

[Brooke0707]

I think both RHOA and RHOC suck this year. And I think part of the reason is that I watch reality tv to escape reality and see the glamorous/mindless petty fights. I know they can’t help it to an extent, but watching both shows it’s a constant reminder of COVID, and social and political issues, and I just don’t want to see that when I’m watching a real housewives show. I also don’t care about the newbies.

Edited December 21, 2020 by Brooke0707

[qtpye]

6 hours ago, bosawks said:

This episode is making me think that the issues in Cynthia’s previous marriage to that shriveled up ballsac aka Peter might not have been all his fault.

Like 99% was but not all....

 

6 hours ago, nexxie said:

I’ve been on Cynthia’s side a lot too, but she is really showing her big ol’ ass about this wedding!

 

5 hours ago, Marley said:

Yea if Drew and Ralph did buy that house then I doubt her name is on the title. What a garbage marriage that is...why are they even married. Ralph is a douche and Drew is an idiot.

Another idiot is Cynthia. All she cares about is the party. Not even a Mike fan but he was right.

I know she did not have much in the way of flowers but to me, nothing is going to top Cynthia's first wedding venue of the Fernbank Museum. I grew up in Atlanta and I was (still am) a giant nerd. Cynthia looked beautiful that day in her high fashion wedding dress...she was stunning.

Her lake house would also be a lovely setting to have a nice low key wedding.

Anyway, if anyone should know the meaning of "It's the marriage that matters not the wedding"...it's Cynthia. Her first wedding was kind of spectacular and her marriage was trash.

She really sounded stupid this episode.

3 hours ago, dosodog said:

I would like to see more of Falyn and her life.  From the brief time I saw, her house looked amazing, she looked high maintenance, yet fun, she hands out gifts and her husband isn't Ralph.

 

Falyn was amazing. She has a very nice house and a tasteful, not over the top tacky, pool and a older husband that seemed to adore her.

Her home was like a high end resort with complimentary hookahs and swag bags.

[CrinkleCutCat]

2 hours ago, Brooke0707 said:

I think both RHOA and RHOC suck this year. And I think part of the reason is that I watch reality tv to escape reality and see the glamorous/mindless petty fights. I know they can’t help it to an extent, but watching both shows it’s a constant reminder of COVID, and social and political issues, and I just don’t want to see that when I’m watching a real housewives show. I also don’t care about the newbies.

Maybe you don’t want the ‘real’ but it’s supposed to be about their real lives (as much as production let it be 🤦‍♀️). This is such a huge part of everyone’s lives that it just can’t be glossed over or ignored. I think they are striking a good balance between the awful reality we are all living and the usual housewives crap, but I can appreciate you, and probably lots of others, are not wanting to see it so much. I’m in Australia, so this is a much more personal look at the BLM movement than I would typically see/read in the news, plus the COVID situation has been handled quite differently in our countries.

I’m with you all on the disgust with Ralph. He really has caveman views on the role of the man in a marriage rather than the modern view of it being a partnership not dictatorship. What an insecure person he is jumping right on the ‘you’ve had a conversation with the therapist so of course you’ve biased her against me’ rubbish. A therapist isn’t asking her for her side of the story, Knucklehead, they are asking for a bit of info about who is coming to the appointment and why...sheesh.

Anyway, wishing you all health and happiness... I’ve never felt the need to write that in any of my Housewives posts... but it feels appropriate at the moment.

[qtpye]

2 minutes ago, CrinkleCutCat said:

Maybe you don’t want the ‘real’ but it’s supposed to be about their real lives (as much as production let it be 🤦‍♀️). This is such a huge part of everyone’s lives that it just can’t be glossed over or ignored. I think they are striking a good balance between the awful reality we are all living and the usual housewives crap, but I can appreciate you, and probably lots of others, are not wanting to see it so much. I’m in Australia, so this is a much more personal look at the BLM movement than I would typically see/read in the news, plus the COVID situation has been handled quite differently in our countries.

I’m with you all on the disgust with Ralph. He really has caveman views on the role of the man in a marriage rather than the modern view of it being a partnership not dictatorship. What an insecure person he is jumping right on the ‘you’ve had a conversation with the therapist so of course you’ve biased her against me’ rubbish. A therapist isn’t asking her for her side of the story, Knucklehead, they are asking for a bit of info about who is coming to the appointment and why...sheesh.

Anyway, wishing you all health and happiness... I’ve never felt the need to write that in any of my Housewives posts... but it feels appropriate at the moment.

What he said about the therapist was such classic gas lighting and manipulation.

5 hours ago, Marley said:

Yea if Drew and Ralph did buy that house then I doubt her name is on the title. What a garbage marriage that is...why are they even married. Ralph is a douche and Drew is an idiot.

Another idiot is Cynthia. All she cares about is the party. Not even a Mike fan but he was right.

I feel like Ralph is doing something shady with the house and that is why he is not letting Drew see any of the paperwork. 

[Chatty Cake]

The new couple is not entertaining. It’s appears to be an unhealthy relationship and the sad thing is there are 3 young children in the middle of it.

Cynthia and the wedding stress bothers me. Have a small wedding instead of being selfish during a pandemic. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[Baltimore Betty]

I thought it was strange that Ralph blew up about his Pastor MIL giving a sermon that related to him, she is living with them, this is a crazy pandemic time so if they are having an issue maybe someone in their church is having the same issue.  Sermons are usually based on things that are going on in the world and maybe giving hope on how to deal with it, right?  

Why if Ralph and Drew constantly fighting why on earth are they hobbling themselves financially on a big house, do they really see themselves in it for the long haul? It will be just more thing to fight about, the paying the bills to keep that big house running will be another layer of pressure and if that house is that big Ralph could leave without her knowing or just hide from her which is not healthy.  Think of all the new hiding places for the cameras he can install.

 

Edited December 22, 2020 by Baltimore Betty
Spelling and a missed word.

[Mr. Miner]

5 hours ago, qtpye said:

She really sounded stupid this episode.

I think Cynthia has been sounding stupid the last 3 or 4 seasons.

Edited December 21, 2020 by Mr. Miner

[Sheenieb]

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Yea if Drew and Ralph did buy that house then I doubt her name is on the title. What a garbage marriage that is...why are they even married. Ralph is a douche and Drew is an idiot.

I was confused about this house business. Ralph made it sound as if the sale hadn't gone through yet. They haven't closed, but they're packing? 🧐

Unless Drew is planning to use these episodes as evidence for Zoom Divorce Court, I don't know why she thought it was a good idea to show her struggle marriage on TV. I have no interest in watching those two argue every week. 

Cynthia is really working my nerves. Hopefully this comes up in a later episode, but she really needs to be honest with Mike about why having this big-ass wedding is so important to her. Her first wedding was a disaster, she was upset all day, so she wants this one to be perfect to make up for the first one. It's crazy, but that's clearly why. 

Still don't care about Toya and the jury is out on Falyn. Nice house, tho. 

[TV Diva Queen]

24 minutes ago, Sheenieb said:

I was confused about this house business. Ralph made it sound as if the sale hadn't gone through yet. They haven't closed, but they're packing? 🧐

Unless Drew is planning to use these episodes as evidence for Zoom Divorce Court, I don't know why she thought it was a good idea to show her struggle marriage on TV. I have no interest in watching those two argue every week. 

Cynthia is really working my nerves. Hopefully this comes up in a later episode, but she really needs to be honest with Mike about why having this big-ass wedding is so important to her. Her first wedding was a disaster, she was upset all day, so she wants this one to be perfect to make up for the first one. It's crazy, but that's clearly why. 

Still don't care about Toya and the jury is out on Falyn. Nice house, tho. 

maybe the lease is up?  "You don't have to go home, but you can't stay" here comes to mind.  

[funnygirl]

Whew, Kenya sunk her hooks into LaToya real quick - very obviously wanting to secure fresh meat to have as an ally on her "side", someone who wasn't around to experience all of her bs in the past. Those two together are annoying AF. 

Cynthia is coming off looking not only selfish, but negligent. Getting married on 10-10-2020, having that date, is of more importance to her than the actual sanctity of marriage in itself, and she doesn't care that there's a pandemic raging all over the world that makes having the big ol' wedding she wants irresponsible and a health risk. It's for aesthetics, because if it were for any other reason she'd wait to get married until things are more safe. 

Ralph is not a man, he's a piece of sh*t. 

Tanya seems extra turnT up this season. lol Don't know what's gotten into her, but I appreciate her fun - albeit chaotic - energy. In doses.

Porsha is MVP for me this season. 

 

[nexxie]

Double kudos to Porsha - for her good work, and for dumping Dennis!!

[spunky]

Drew you in danger girl! Maybe it's just me, if my husband left for 3 days without an explanation , he wasn't coming back.  I'm 99.9% sure her name is not on the title to the new house. She needs to leave this fool asap.  

Cynthia throwing  a tantrum about her wedding during a damn pandemic is beyond annoying.  She seems more concerned about having a big wedding than she is about having a lasting marriage .

 

[luckyroll3]

I don't think I could take another episode of Ralph. What a raging dick. Every time he's on screen I just want to kick him in the balls.  I have never disliked a husband/partner so intensely. Not even Peter, Apollo, Marc (cause he was on screen about the same amount of time as he was in his marriage to Kenya) or Matt.

Drew needs to be careful, because there is no reason for her not to be involved in or know/understand the process of buying the house, other than to ensure that douche of a husband has complete control. From the little I've seen of Ralph, I wouldn't be shocked if Drew's name ends up nowhere on any documents related to the house. And he'll have some gaslighting reason as to why. And when they/their marriage implodes, he won't think twice about kicking her ass out and moving in his Tampa side-piece. 

I'm shocked to learn that Kenya didn't get a prenup. What in the hell was she thinking? Marc can't be that fire in bed; he's too narcissistic. 

According to Kandi on her Speak On It youtube series, Kenya and LaToya get along so well because they're basically the same person.  That has the potential to be real toxic; the show doesn't need 2 Kenya's (and I generally don't mind Kenya, but fully acknowledge she can be quite a nasty bitch when she's ready). It seems like the 2 of them, but particularly LaToya, will be going after Drew this season and I'm not looking forward to that.

[NowVoyager]

In fairness to Cynthia every bride I've ever known has lost their damn minds acted unlike themselves while planning their wedding. It's a shame for her that she couldn't hear what Mike was saying, because it was actually very sweet. 

Ralph's name is appropriate because I want to vomit every time he's on screen. His energy is defensive & argumentative. He speaks to his wife in ways that are belittling & condescending. His actions are shady & then he gaslights his wife when she questions him. But, hey, she's managed to "keep a man" unlike Kenya. So.... yea?

[Vanderboom]

I don't know how much more of Runaway Ralph I can take. He really needs to get off my screen, with his "so now the therapist has your biased take" nonsense. My gut feeling is that the money for the new house was earned by Drew, so his whole shtick about how the closing is his responsibility is bullshit.

I'm not here for the Kenya/Latoya Shade fest, either. I found it interesting that Kenya was cackling with Latoya over the wig/cat comment when last week, she was shaking her head at it with Cynthia, all "we don't do things like that." Number one, there have been worse  wigs on this show. Number two, I hope they don't expect Drew to be cordial with them after seeing how they gleefully took her apart on the first day they met her.

I liked the Portia pool party. I thought it was hilarious how the women went from rough-housing and making WAP jokes to earnestly and insightfully talking about Black Lives Matter. These women have layers. I hope Portia stays in this space; Post-Dennis Portia is far better than Post-Kordell Portia.

Edited December 22, 2020 by Vanderboom
Missing words

[TV Diva Queen]

1 hour ago, Vanderboom said:

I don't know how much more of Runaway Ralph I can take. He really needs to get off my screen, with his "so now the therapist has your biased take" nonsense. My gut is that the money for the new house was earned by Drew, so his whole shtick about how the closing is his responsibility is bullshit.

I'm not here for the Kenya/Latoya Shade fest, either. I found it interesting that Kenya was cackling with Latoya over the wig/cat comment when last week, she was shaking her head at it with Cynthia, all "we don't do things like that." Number one, there have been worse  wigs on this show. Number two, I hope they don't expect Drew to be cordial with them after seeing how they gleefully took her apart on the first day they met her.

I liked the Portia pool party. I thought it was hilarious how the women went from rough-housing and making WAP jokes to earnestly and insightfully talking about Black Lives Matter. These women have layers. I hope Portia stays in this space; Post-Dennis Portia is far better than Post-Kordell Portia.

Porsha was hilarious in her talking head...Producer:  isn't all WAP good WAP and then Porsha goes off about ocean wap and how you don't want to get lost in that....

[bosawks]

Wreck-it Ralph has already reached a pantheon of bad husbands/partners that includes OC Brooks and ATL Apollo in just a handful of episodes.

It’s almost kind of impressive.

[gaPeach]

Quote

In fairness to Cynthia every bride I've ever known has lost their damn minds acted unlike themselves while planning their wedding. It's a shame for her that she couldn't hear what Mike was saying, because it was actually very sweet.

She is losing her mind over this wedding and that is ridiculous but not as ridiculous as their clear face coverings.  I was too distracted by his face covering pushed back so his month is not covered....hahaha.  

[Neurochick]

On 12/20/2020 at 8:37 PM, Stats Queen said:

Cynthia really is vapid- and I rooted for her for a long time, her focus on a big wedding in the middle of a world-wide pandemic over a marriage is just disturbing- Cynthia, you are not a high school student who missed all the important milestones in their senior year. You are a grown ass woman and both you and Mike have been married before. - actions like hers is what makes high risk people like me hesitant to go anywhere where more than 8 people are close together.

I don't get Cynthia at all.  She wants to have a BIG wedding to show her friends and family that "SEE, I have a MAN and this time  he's the RIGHT one!"  That's vapid period, but now, during COVID it's beyond vapid, it's stupid and inconsiderate.  They can get married on 10/10/2020, have a small wedding, and have a big blowout when everything returns to normal, because you know that eventually it will.  

[Rambunctiouscurls]

Is Cynthia 14? Because I cannot with the fairytale wedding at all let alone during a pandemic. 

[Neurochick]

On 12/21/2020 at 1:17 AM, Brooke0707 said:

I think both RHOA and RHOC suck this year. And I think part of the reason is that I watch reality tv to escape reality and see the glamorous/mindless petty fights. I know they can’t help it to an extent, but watching both shows it’s a constant reminder of COVID, and social and political issues, and I just don’t want to see that when I’m watching a real housewives show. I also don’t care about the newbies.

But if the show is supposed to show their "real lives", BLM and COVID are part of it.  

The only way they could have avoided COVID and BLM is if they hadn't filmed at all this year, but IMO, that would have been very dishonest, and ignoring the "elephant in the living room" meaning what has happened this year.  Like it or not both COVID and BLM are a part of many people's lives.  

[amarante]

All I can say is Porsha should get an aware for the housewife who grew the most and became a genuinely admirable person. Sure she has still got normal human flaws but I NEVER would have thought that the woman who didn't know anything about the Underground Railroad has morphed into a woman her grandfather could be genuinely proud as carrying on his legacy.

Looking back maybe she was being smart the first few seasons and deliberately adopting an airhead persona.

Now all she needs to do is get rid of 175 pounds of ugly fat - aka Dennis. 

Why do these women seem to get into relationships with really awful men. With the exception of Todd they are uniformly terrible. Good for Kandi that she was able to look past the superficials in terms of marrying someone who was just an ordinary hardworking good guy - not flashy and he seems to have stepped up to the plate and really become her partner both professionally and personally.

[amarante]

The reason Cynthia was hell bent on having the wedding despite Covid restrictions was because it was supposed to be her main storyline. Weddings typically are highlighted on the BRAVO shows.

Also by having the wedding being filmed for broadcast, she was able to get significant discounts or free stuff for the wedding. I mean seriously - how much business has that venue done during the pandemic even in a state like Atlanta which wasn't as locked down as others. The venue would probably have PAID CYNTHIA to be featured and host the wedding.

[Neurochick]

4 hours ago, amarante said:

Why do these women seem to get into relationships with really awful men. With the exception of Todd they are uniformly terrible. Good for Kandi that she was able to look past the superficials in terms of marrying someone who was just an ordinary hardworking good guy - not flashy and he seems to have stepped up to the plate and really become her partner both professionally and personally.

There is a really good book called "Is Marriage For White People?"  It was written in 2012, by Ralph Richard Banks.  He goes by stats, numbers and explains why it's so hard for black women.  Black men marry outside their race, three times (maybe more) that of black women.  Black men have too many options and black women have too few. 

[Stats Queen]

1 hour ago, Neurochick said:

There is a really good book called "Is Marriage For White People?"  It was written in 2012, by Ralph Richard Banks.  He goes by stats, numbers and explains why it's so hard for black women.  Black men marry outside their race, three times (maybe more) that of black women.  Black men have too many options and black women have too few. 

I’m not sure if it was you or someone else who mentioned this before. I started reading the book and it is very enlightening. Thanks for the reference.

[amarante]

2 hours ago, Neurochick said:

There is a really good book called "Is Marriage For White People?"  It was written in 2012, by Ralph Richard Banks.  He goes by stats, numbers and explains why it's so hard for black women.  Black men marry outside their race, three times (maybe more) that of black women.  Black men have too many options and black women have too few. 

The issue isn't race specific as there were similar studies done regarding white professional women who theoretically also faced the same small pool of eligible men since many men did not want and/or need to marry someone on their same educational or professional level. Years ago there was a study which claimed that your odds were the same as being killed by a meteor - although I suspect that was a bit of hyperbole.

It seems far better to be single than to attach yourself to some of the extreme losers these women marry. Serial cheaters - controlling verging on abusive like Drew's husband. 

[Neurochick]

7 minutes ago, amarante said:

The issue isn't race specific as there were similar studies done regarding white professional women who theoretically also faced the same small pool of eligible men since many men did not want and/or need to marry someone on their same educational or professional level. Years ago there was a study which claimed that your odds were the same as being killed by a meteor - although I suspect that was a bit of hyperbole.

I was speaking about black women on this show, I never mentioned white women.

The difference is that white men and women marry outside their race at about the same rate, not so with black men and women, so it's harder for black women. 

 

 

[TexasGal]

Hey y'all - we're straying a little too far off course with the marriage conversation.  Please take it over to small talk.  This discussion should be on events from the episode only.