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S02.E07: I'm Not Your Baby


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5 minutes ago, poeticlicensed said:

Ya but it's a ok to go off and start screaming. Just weird. 

The camera crew was positioned to shoot the back of her head out of respect to Ma's wishes but they were caught off guard by the shrieking, hollering and close confrontation with Britt....it could have been worse for Britt if they weren't there....she would have started to beat on Britt out of anger.

Britt was lying to Yazoo who was lying to his parents about Britt's intentions to convert and get married so he made it worse for her.

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Maybe it’s that modesty thing that no one other than your husband should see you.  But she must go out to the market and the mosque.  Some people don’t believe in being photographed but I don’t think that’s an Islamic issue. 

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1 hour ago, MrBuhBye said:

Maybe it’s that modesty thing that no one other than your husband should see you.  But she must go out to the market and the mosque.  Some people don’t believe in being photographed but I don’t think that’s an Islamic issue. 

She might not. She might have someone who works for her that does that. Or her husband does the shopping. 

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3 hours ago, Rt66vintage said:

Jihoon's irresponsibly has always been Deaven's song and dance throughout their storyline.

She was all droopy faced when she first went to SK to introduce the infant to his grandparents. She wasn't happy in their small apartment, and I believe that's when the lies began, i.e. Jihoon having legal issues & money issues, and Deaven ignoring the red flags.

I just can't with her, telling us how she's attracted to Asian men, blah, blah, blah. Ok, great, have at it like bunnies, but for God's sake be careful!  Now this season she tells us that actually she tried to be careful, but oops the condom fell off. Sure, Jan.

She's obviously not a careful girl as evidenced by her older daughter, whose father is apparently violent and/or in prison. Not good marriage material. 

People say just move on, find someone better, go home to live with mommy, but Deaven's basket of good prospects is shrinking. I want to see the successful, attractive man who will gladly accept responsibility for this sad miserable woman and her two children. She might meet a perfectly fine man with resources, but he will not be up to her superficial standards. Like Tom said, "She'll be a lonely 50-year-old woman..."

All of this.

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On 7/14/2020 at 9:27 AM, SunnyBeBe said:

A part of me wonders if Ariela is trying to get back at her parents in some way.  Like,. watch me make them miserable, worrying about me living in this fashion.  I just don't get it. Recall how she made such a demonstrative statement at the dinner table before her departure about moving to Ethiopia PERMANENTLY.  Almost like to rub it in.  Did she really want to live in that fashion for the rest of her life?  Does she have a servant's heart and want to do some kind of mission?  Is she promoting self sacrifice?  I have no issue with that type of lifestyle, as it's common there.  That's how it is.  But, what about it drew her in and caused to give up everything at home to move into it?  I don't particularly see much of a bond with Biniyam.  A nice guy, but, rather casual having his hobbies and enjoying life.  He doesn't appear to be a person who's going to be moving her into a substantially different type of housing. Great for there, but, still not something she would feel comfortable in.  Has she looked into the educational situation?  

There's an interesting story about her childhood on Reddit. It wasn't a happy one according to her babysitter. Not sure how accurate it is. I rarely post, I'm more of a lurker so I'm not sure if I'm linking this correctly.  https://www.reddit.com/r/90DayFiance/comments/gzezbd/i_used_to_babysit_ariels/

 

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On 7/14/2020 at 1:55 PM, Kangatush said:

Tons of people around the world don't refrigerate.  They shop every day for the food to eat that day.  And if they're not eating a lot of meat or dairy, there's no need to refrigerate either.  

I think part of Jenny's deal is that without being married, she can only be there for 6 months and I don't think she can work.

We tend to buy in bulk in North America and also refrigerate many more things than really necessary. I know people who refrigerate things like peanut butter.

It doesn’t really surprise me that in other places it wouldn’t be common to have a fridge. 

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18 hours ago, Dmarie019 said:

<snip>

I keep wondering about Yazan's sister that is in the US. I wonder how his parents feel about that??? I have a feeling she isn't so strict as her family in Jordan, Brittany probably hangs around her and therefore thinks that she doesn't have to be serious about muslim culture either?  But when the mom got mad, that was scary!  However overall the family must not be super strict (except the mom) because the dad has no issues with being on a tv show. AND he told Yazan to go check on Brittany when she left. I bet the mother could have cared less. Seemed like he was trying to be fairly gentle with Brittany but when the mom went in on her he was like "ok I have to side with my wife" and started to lay down the hammer too. 

This is just my opinion, but I suspect in many cultures that have restrictive rules on behavior (whether mandated by law, such as countries that are theocracies, or countries in which the rules are cultural norms), there may be different levels of compliance in the home versus in the public square.

In the home: "What happens here, stays here."

In the public square: "Follow the rules!"

In theocracies, the penalty for not abiding by the laws governing behavior may be imprisonment or death (death may be at the hands of the government or the family/community*).

In Jordan, India, etc., not abiding by the cultural norms can result in the entire family being shunned by other family members (those not living in the home) and the community in which they live - including making it difficult (and in some cases, impossible) for the unmarried siblings of the "offending" family member to find mates (especially in cultures in which arranged marriages are the norm). Many of these cultures are poor, with survival frequently dependent on community cooperation and support.

*An excellent book on the topic of what it's like to live in a theocracy is "Princess: A True Story of Life Behind the Veil in Saudi Arabia" by Jean Sasson: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967673747/ref=cm_sw_r_apa_i_lsfeFbST4R5M

While there have been numerous changes to the laws governing women in Saudi Arabia since the book was published in 1992, I think it provides a good overview of the pressures of living in a society that imposes restrictive laws/rules of behavior on its citizens.

Edited by TwirlyGirly
Added clarification regarding book recommendation.
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1 hour ago, fountain said:

We tend to buy in bulk in North America and also refrigerate many more things than really necessary. I know people who refrigerate things like peanut butter.

It doesn’t really surprise me that in other places it wouldn’t be common to have a fridge. 

When my  grandparents were children, they didn't have a refrigerator in their homes. They had what was called an "ice box."  It looked like a small fridge, but, it was not powered by electricity  It held a block of ice and kept food items cool.   A man would come around to the homes and bring a block every few days. I find that just amazing.  Of course, they got their milk daily from the cow, fresh eggs from their chicken,  ham was cured in the smokehouse, and fruits and vegetables they grew were canned for later use.  I really respect people who can live this way.  To them, it was normal.  

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30 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

When my  grandparents were children, they didn't have a refrigerator in their homes. They had what was called an "ice box."  It looked like a small fridge, but, it was not powered by electricity  It held a block of ice and kept food items cool.   A man would come around to the homes and bring a block every few days. I find that just amazing.  Of course, they got their milk daily from the cow, fresh eggs from their chicken,  ham was cured in the smokehouse, and fruits and vegetables they grew were canned for later use.  I really respect people who can live this way.  To them, it was normal.  

My great uncle was an "ice man", which meant that he worked for the local ice company and delivered big blocks of ice each day to folks along his route, which they put in their ice boxes. On the weekends he was a pinsetter at a bowling alley. Before they invented the machines that reset the pins, they had men at the end of the alleys who manually filled up the pin machines. Different times folks, different times. 

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47 minutes ago, SunnyBeBe said:

When my  grandparents were children, they didn't have a refrigerator in their homes. They had what was called an "ice box."  It looked like a small fridge, but, it was not powered by electricity  It held a block of ice and kept food items cool.   A man would come around to the homes and bring a block every few days

My mother was born on a farm in CT in 1917 - the 6th child of 11 children.

They also had an ice box until she was a teenager and electricity (and plumbing!) were finally installed in the house.

I remember exactly where the outhouse was on the property, and recall my mother taking me to it several times when we visited when I was very young (it was just easier to take me to the outhouse if I was playing outside and needed to go).

I started to learn how to cook at the age of seven, and my lifelong passion for reading cookbooks began around the same age. 

I was about 13 when one day it occurred to me many of the cuisines known for very spicy dishes seemed to come from poorer countries, and I recall asking my mother if this was so, and why. She explained it's because often those living in poorer countries don't have refrigeration and/or access to the freshest meat (and can't afford to throw away food that has begun to turn), so their cuisines developed to use a lot of spices to mask the taste of ingredients that may have started to spoil...

According to Wikipedia, Ethiopian meat dishes are usually very spicy. That may be the reason why.

Edited by TwirlyGirly
Additional info re Ethiopian cuisine specifically
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15 hours ago, Jeanne222 said:

Not that I recall.  That was strange.   Maybe Michael's parents when they showed up at the apartment?   Surely Brittany, as pretty as she is, will leave as soon as possible!

Does the show make them sign a contract to stay so long?

no, that's the genius of this show. They learned from other reality shows whose main premise is to essentially take advantage of people's willingness to debase themselves. It's the opposite of the Teen Mom model. That show started out basically as as study of poverty among American youths, and how single moms struggle, then became basically real housewives by starting to pay them six figures a year. Now it's a study of how poor people mistreat money, for the most part. THIS show pays $1000 an episode, I think $1500 if you're a couple on the same episode. It's enough money that if you're a barista with a habit of traveling to Tunisia to see your fiance but don't own your own car, you have to take it, but not so much money that it's going to ruin one of the things that makes the show interesting.  I mean it's a little dark to think of it as a consumer, but it's pretty obvious when they start sending these dummies all over the world they're not on their own dime anymore. There's just no way that one girl with Azan, Nicole I think, can afford a single trip to Tunisia, much less multiple trips. 

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On 7/14/2020 at 8:56 AM, DEL901 said:

It kind of got lost in the yelling and subtitles, but what Yazam’s dad said was something like.... “she hasn’t even taken down her social media.  People will think she is a prostitute”.    That isn’t the same as calling her a prostitute.   In the first episode she was twerking and showing off her sexy videos.  Perhaps in conservative Jordanian Muslim culture, it might look as if she were a woman of low morals and embarrass the family.  

I actually felt sorry for Yazam’s mom when she started wailing about how Brittany has been stalling for a year because it was clear Brittany wasn’t in any hurry, heck, she didn’t bother reading about Islam...thank goodness she kept her mouth shut about being married.  Mama Yazam’s behaviour offended us westerners, but she isn’t western.  I certainly wouldn’t marry into that situation and I don’t think Brittany should, but she has brought this all on her self.   She may not have said she’d convert, but she implied it. And she thinks she’s too good to have to change....she should have read up on Queen Noor of Jordan   She was American and had to make changes.

IMO, this is the end of their story.  She will be on the next plane home.   

I'm not too sure about that.  

IIRC, Father Yazan mentioned "divorce papers" in his rant about her for stalling.  

Huh?

TLC kind of lost me with that one, because if she'd mentioned waiting on divorce papers previously, why would the fact said divorce wasn't finalized yet be such a shock to Family Yazan?  Made no sense to me, but Father Yazan (and presumably all of Family Yazan) must know about her marriage and pending divorce.  

Edited by Persnickety1
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@TwirlyGirly, Two of my favorite books growing up were cookbooks for kids. We literally worked our way through the cookbooks making all kinds of things with our mom looking over our shoulders. I too loved all the descriptions and the little anecdotes that cookbooks would include.  Food comes with such rich and colorful memories for everyone, so I enjoy reading what other people think about food. That said, I am always amazed by friends of mine now who are so particular about the quality of the food they eat. The challenge in our house was to almost clean out the cupboard and eat creations we had prepared - and our parents never complained.  I even remember using powdered milk and running to the neighbors for a pinch of salt or a little bit of sugar.  Pulling something out and smelling it and examining it to see if it had gone bad was our science experIment and most likely you ate it anyway.  I now have friends who will bring home leftovers and they won’t eat it Because the bread is too hard or the meat was too tough or the veggies too soggy.  Boo hoo.   I don’t know what these people do when they go someplace where food isn’t as easily accessible. I guess they eat more packaged junk food.  Yuck.

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(edited)
45 minutes ago, Uncle JUICE said:

It's enough money that if you're a barista with a habit of traveling to Tunisia to see your fiance but don't own your own car, you have to take it, but not so much money that it's going to ruin one of the things that makes the show interesting.  I mean it's a little dark to think of it as a consumer, but it's pretty obvious when they start sending these dummies all over the world they're not on their own dime anymore. There's just no way that one girl with Azan, Nicole I think, can afford a single trip to Tunisia, much less multiple trips

Azan is Moroccan, not Tunisian, and he lives in Morocco, not Tunisia. 😉

Edited by TwirlyGirly
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2 hours ago, Persnickety1 said:

I'm not too sure about that.  

IIRC, Father Yazan mentioned "divorce papers" in his rant about her for stalling.  

Sorry, I missed a word. I meant it was a good thing she didnt  mention she was STILL married.  

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5 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I was about 13 when one day it occurred to me many of the cuisines known for very spicy dishes seemed to come from poorer countries, and I recall asking my mother if this was so, and why. She explained it's because often those living in poorer countries don't have refrigeration and/or access to the freshest meat (and can't afford to throw away food that has begun to turn), so their cuisines developed to use a lot of spices to mask the taste of ingredients that may have started to spoil...

According to Wikipedia, Ethiopian meat dishes are usually very spicy. That may be the reason why.

I have heard that as well. 

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22 hours ago, Wanda said:

I’m going to say something never said on social media.

you've changed my mind.

LOL I am doing a re-watch of 'The Good Place' and Michael uses this as an example of something that never happens.  

 

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On 7/14/2020 at 7:46 PM, Neurochick said:

You're a better person that I.  I didn't feel sorry for her AT ALL.  SHE was the disrespectful one.  "I'm not a Muslim, I'm black?"  She deserved to be yelled at just for that dumbass, ignorant statement.

 

Guess she's never heard of Muhammad Ali.

6 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

*An excellent book on the topic of what it's like to live in a theocracy is "Princess: A True Story of Life Behind the Veil in Saudi Arabia" by Jean Sasson: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0967673747/ref=cm_sw_r_apa_i_lsfeFbST4R5M

While there have been numerous changes to the laws governing women in Saudi Arabia since the book was published in 1992, I think it provides a good overview of the pressures of living in a society that imposes restrictive laws/rules of behavior on its citizens.

I read that book. Its very good. 

RE: Yazan's mother not wanting to be photographed, she probably doesn't want strangers to see her face, which would be disrespectful. Its one thing to move about in her own community--go to the market, visit friends, and so on. She might veil fully when she goes out. 

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14 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I was about 13 when one day it occurred to me many of the cuisines known for very spicy dishes seemed to come from poorer countries, and I recall asking my mother if this was so, and why. She explained it's because often those living in poorer countries don't have refrigeration and/or access to the freshest meat (and can't afford to throw away food that has begun to turn), so their cuisines developed to use a lot of spices to mask the taste of ingredients that may have started to spoil...

According to Wikipedia, Ethiopian meat dishes are usually very spicy. That may be the reason why.

1) Your mom sounds amazing.  2)  It's probably true.  All cultures found some way to try to make food last, drying, salting, pickling... spice goes right along with that.

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2 hours ago, Kangatush said:

1) Your mom sounds amazing.  2)  It's probably true.  All cultures found some way to try to make food last, drying, salting, pickling... spice goes right along with that.

She was amazing - thank you!

My mom passed away from osteosarcoma when I was 25. It's been decades, but I still miss her.

When I was 22, my then-boyfriend took me to meet his father. His dad had a huge pork roast sitting out on his kitchen counter.

My boyfriend's dad only spoke Spanish (he was Puerto Rican), so through my boyfriend I asked about the pork roast.

His dad said he was marinating it to roast in the oven the following day.

I then asked what marinade he used, and why the pork roast wasn't in the fridge.

He said he took a knife with a long, thin blade and pierced deep holes in the pork roast, then poured a seasoning called Adobo down into the holes, all the way to the center of the meat.

As to not having the pork roast in the fridge; he shrugged and said he always did it that way - marinated at room temperature for 24 hours or so.

All I could think about was bacteria multiplying like crazy and everybody eating it ending up in the hospital with food poisoning.

Back home that evening, I asked my mother about it. She said the Adobo seasoning probably has a lot of salt in it (I discovered a few months later it's mostly salt!), and salt would inhibit bacterial growth. Then she said even if bacteria did grow, chances are everyone eating that pork roast probably had been eating similarly prepared pork like that their entire lives, and had built up antibodies against the type of bacteria that would grow in pork with that preparation. She explained that's why Mexicans in Mexico can drink the tap water and not get sick, but Americans who go to Mexico and drink the water usually do become ill.

Smart woman!

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19 hours ago, Xena said:

LOL I am doing a re-watch of 'The Good Place' and Michael uses this as an example of something that never happens.  

 

You’re my new best friend

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(edited)

I just finished watching the episode. Four nights in a row I put it on, and four nights in a row I fell asleep right before Yazan and Brittany's big scene.

Ya know, up until the age of 40, if I wanted to learn about something I'd have to get in the car and drive to the library and find books on the subject. Then I'd have to bring those books home and read them - sometimes several long books to get a good overview of the topic.

I first got internet access and a computer in 1998. I thought I died and went to heaven. Anything I wanted to learn, I could - with just a few clicks of the keys. 

That first year I spent hours a day reading up on every topic that happened to pop into my head. I think I learned more about a wider variety of topics in that year than I learned in my first 12 years of school.

At the time I believed the internet would revolutionize informal education, and even those who didn't live in an area with a good school system, library, or other forms of learning (travel, knowledgeable family and/or friends, etc) would have a way to learn just about anything under the sun. I predicted a much smarter populace, regardless of race, income, disability, etc..

But that didn't happen, at least not to the extent I predicted. Brittany, and many of the other 90 Day Fiance franchise participants, fall in love with people who were born, raised, and live in cultures very different than the average American's experiences in the U.S.. Every one of them has access to the internet, and the ability to learn a lot about the culture of those they love, in a relatively short period of time. But rarely do they do it. Their ignorance, and arrogance, is astounding.

I've noticed something else, too. Several of the fiances, coming to the U.S., have been chided by their American fiances or their family and/or friends to "learn English" and have been told "Now you're in America, you have to adjust to American culture!"

Yet, when the American fiances visit other countries, they balk at adopting their fiances culture - even temporarily - insisting they don't have to because they're American.

That's Brittany. Also Libby (well it's Libby's mother that said it). Nicole. Angela. Lisa. And those are just off the top of my head.

Brittany lied to Yazan and his family about still being married. She's done nothing to learn about Islam, how it's practiced in Jordan, or the cultural norms governing behavior in that country.

No. She's been too busy taking pictures of herself twerking and posting them to Instagram to spend a few hours - at minimum - learning about that which has molded the personality, behavior, and daily life of a man from birth - a man she claims she loves.

I suspect Brittany has always used her face and her body to get what she wants from men, and truly believed she could do the same with Yazan. That once he'd experienced Brittany's golden p***y, Yazan would readily abandon his family, his friends, his upbringing, his religion, his entire culture - to ensure he'd get more of it in the future.

When I lived in North Texas, I became close friends with a couple of single Muslim men, and several Muslim families. I took advantage of these friendships to learn as much as I could about Islam and how it's practiced in different Muslim majority countries. I asked questions about how much Islam influences the culture in those countries, especially in terms of spousal relationships, relationships with family and friends, behavior, and dress. All of these things vary between countries, sometimes within different geographical areas in a country, and/or by age group or socioeconomic level.

 I can say with confidence Yazan will never relent on Brittany needing to convert, or his insistence Brittany abide by Jordanian cultural norms. 

I have no sympathy for Brittany whatsoever; she's in this mess because she's intellectually lazy and believes her body is all she needs to manipulate men to get what she wants.

She's lucky she hooked up with a Jordanian, though. If she'd caught the eye of a Saudi prince and behaved the same way in Saudi Arabia, she could have landed in jail. Or worse.

So there's that.

And now for a little snark. Brittany does something weird with her mouth when she talks, and I don't think it's entirely due to her braces. It makes her look...odd:

brittany-is-excited-and-nervous.jpeg.401e0ac271d167a70b8b000f6cb3358d.jpeg

TL/DR: That's okay. I had a lot to get off my chest and I rambled. 😉

Edited by TwirlyGirly
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(edited)

How does Deavan pick the one Korean who has zero future, zero drive?  No stereotyping, but South Korea has one of the highest percentage of college degrees in the world.  It's a society that is very ambitious.  She picks the one guy that can't give her shit.

I also don't understand the "oopsie" pregnancies.  If you aren't on birth control b/c you can't afford it, then how are you going to afford to raise the oops?  I think most of these women are in the "I'm so in love with this man that if I happen to get pregnant, it will be so awesome!"  Not saying the men aren't complicit.  They can wrap it up.  But I'm not going to depend on a man to make sure I don't get pregnant,

Not to mention, if they really didn't want to get pregnant but were unprotected, Plan B is available now at Target.  There's zero excuse.  

Edited by Boo Boo
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14 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

I just finished watching the episode. Four nights in a row I put it on, and four nights in a row I fell asleep right before Yazan and Brittany's big scene.

Ya know, up until the age of 40, if I wanted to learn about something I'd have to get in the car and drive to the library and find books on the subject. Then I'd have to bring those books home and read them - sometimes several long books to get a good overview of the topic.

I first got internet access and a computer in 1998. I thought I died and went to heaven. Anything I wanted to learn, I could - with just a few clicks of the keys. 

That first year I spent hours a day reading up on every topic that happened to pop into my head. I think I learned more about a wider variety of topics in that year than I learned in my first 12 years of school.

At the time I believed the internet would revolutionize informal education, and even those who didn't live in an area with a good school system, library, or other forms of learning (travel, knowledgeable family and/or friends, etc) would have a way to learn just about anything under the sun. I predicted a much smarter populace, regardless of race, income, disability, etc..

But that didn't happen, at least not to the extent I predicted. Brittany, and many of the other 90 Day Fiance franchise participants, fall in love with people who were born, raised, and live in cultures very different than the average American's experiences in the U.S.. Every one of them has access to the internet, and the ability to learn a lot about the culture of those they love, in a relatively short period of time. But rarely do they do it. Their ignorance, and arrogance, is astounding.

I've noticed something else, too. Several of the fiances, coming to the U.S., have been chided by their American fiances or their family and/or friends to "learn English" and have been told "Now you're in America, you have to adjust to American culture!"

Yet, when the American fiances visit other countries, they balk at adopting their fiances culture - even temporarily - insisting they don't have to because they're American.

That's Brittany. Also Libby (well it's Libby's mother that said it). Nicole. Angela. Lisa. And those are just off the top of my head.

Brittany lied to Yazan and his family about still being married. She's done nothing to learn about Islam, how it's practiced in Jordan, or the cultural norms governing behavior in that country.

No. She's been too busy taking pictures of herself twerking and posting them to Instagram to spend a few hours - at minimum - learning about that which has molded the personality, behavior, and daily life of a man from birth - a man she claims she loves.

I suspect Brittany has always used her face and her body to get what she wants from men, and truly believed she could do the same with Yazan. That once he'd experienced Brittany's golden p***y, Yazan would readily abandon his family, his friends, his upbringing, his religion, his entire culture - to ensure he'd get more of it in the future.

When I lived in North Texas, I became close friends with a couple of single Muslim men, and several Muslim families. I took advantage of these friendships to learn as much as I could about Islam and how it's practiced in different Muslim majority countries. I asked questions about how much Islam influences the culture in those countries, especially in terms of spousal relationships, relationships with family and friends, behavior, and dress. All of these things vary between countries, sometimes within different geographical areas in a country, and/or by age group or socioeconomic level.

 I can say with confidence Yazan will never relent on Brittany needing to convert, or his insistence Brittany abide by Jordanian cultural norms. 

I have no sympathy for Brittany whatsoever; she's in this mess because she's intellectually lazy and believes her body is all she needs to manipulate men to get what she wants.

She's lucky she hooked up with a Jordanian, though. If she'd caught the eye of a Saudi prince and behaved the same way in Saudi Arabia, she could have landed in jail. Or worse.

So there's that.

And now for a little snark. Brittany does something weird with her mouth when she talks, and I don't think it's entirely due to her braces. It makes her look...odd:

brittany-is-excited-and-nervous.jpeg.401e0ac271d167a70b8b000f6cb3358d.jpeg

TL/DR: That's okay. I had a lot to get off my chest and I rambled. 😉

@TwirlyGirly: if you need a new best friend, I'm here! I agree 100% with everything you wrote! For those of us who didn't get online/internet until we were around age 30, I think we appreciate MORE the ability to research anything that comes to our head that we'd like to know. I'm often told I "over-research" things (like vacations, items I wish to purchase, the weather, health topics, I could go on). This is what surprised me about Laura, that she was close to my age and didn't think/Google what her life would be like with Aladin.  I also agree on Brittany's mouth! It's like the braces/teeth are too large and she's talking around them, or she has the habit of her Father and often smiling while speaking.

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On 7/14/2020 at 11:53 AM, Kath94 said:

Because Yazan has seen the wild, hot Brittany, and THAT'S what he wants.  But he expects Brittany to play the part of the subservient, submissive, conservative Muslim housewife.  He has been hinting to her all along that she should convert, get married immediately, and always wear a hijab.  She has been hinting to him all along that she has no plans to do any of that.    I personally believe that Yazan is more concerned over what his parents & the general public see in Brittany.  Maybe he should move to Florida.  Then he can do all the drugs and/or alcohol he wants.

In one of the first episodes, Brittany mentioned that Yazan loved his Tramadol.  So he is already at a minimum involved with drugs, at the maximum, an addict.

 

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2 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

Not to mention, if they really didn't want to get pregnant but were unprotected, Plan B is available now at Target.  There's zero excuse.  

That's certainly true of Deavan. She said Jihoon did wear a condom but it fell off.

Kalani, not so much. I did some research on Plan B in Samoa and it's very difficult to get there. You have to go to one clinic to get it.

As for pregnancy #2, Kalani isn't the brightest bulb when it comes to contraception. Recall she said she couldn't use birth control while breastfeeding - and that simply isn't true. I'll bet, if asked, she'd say Plan B is an abortifacient...

Although you could argue anyone that ignorant about birth control who can't afford a baby probably shouldn't be having sex at all - and I'd agree with that!

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On 7/14/2020 at 7:49 AM, Xena said:

I'm not sure if they said how they met, but I would bet that Yazan watched one of her twerking videos 50 times, then slid into her DMs.

Brittney knew Yazan’s sister, who was living in the states. Brittney saw Yazan on a video call with his sister and thought he was hot, he thought she was hot and they got to chatting. 

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On 7/16/2020 at 4:00 AM, Snarkology101 said:

There's an interesting story about her childhood on Reddit. It wasn't a happy one according to her babysitter. Not sure how accurate it is. I rarely post, I'm more of a lurker so I'm not sure if I'm linking this correctly.  https://www.reddit.com/r/90DayFiance/comments/gzezbd/i_used_to_babysit_ariels/

 

I’m the former babysitter, unfortunately it’s accurate.

ETA: for people that don’t feel like reading the posts on reddit. She had very troubled childhood. The only childhood of a second marriage with contentious divorce (And some shady issues... )The older half siblings (Different father, not Jewish) treated her terribly and she was always left out, being bullied, or crying. Parents worked a lot and were not home often. I’m not surprised she moved to Argentina as soon as she should and got married and kept going where normally she would have been in college in her circles. She also wasn’t a pampered princess, yes family had $ but had a lot of issues. Her paternal grandmother was her main support when I knew them, who she called up daily crying....She was always crying bc of her half siblings resenting her for the divorce (fueled by their father) I’m glad to see her Mom and her getting along now much better. It also amazing to see her her smiling so much!

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15 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

How does Deavan pick the one Korean who has zero future, zero drive?  No stereotyping, but South Korea has one of the highest percentage of college degrees in the world.  It's a society that is very ambitious.  She picks the one guy that can't give her shit.

It was a chance meeting on Tinder.  She and Jahoon "talked" for three months and then he decided to visit Deavan. It was actually a one-night stand and she was "lucky enough" to get pregnant.  So...she didn't select him from a group of South Koreans.  Also, he probably was a sweet soul online and he's a LIAR!

 

15 hours ago, Boo Boo said:

I also don't under the "oopsie" pregnancies.  If you aren't on birth control b/c you can't afford it, then how are you going to afford to raise the oops?  I think most of these women are in the "I'm so in love with this man that if I happen to get pregnant, it will be so awesome!"  Not saying the men aren't complicit.  They can wrap it up.  But I'm not going to depend on a man to make sure I don't get pregnant,

Again, one-night stand and he was supposedly wearing a condom.  Deavan needs to hurry back to the USA, get a job, and forget about "romance" for awhile.

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On 7/16/2020 at 7:44 AM, TwirlyGirly said:

My mother was born on a farm in CT in 1917 - the 6th child of 11 children.

They also had an ice box until she was a teenager and electricity (and plumbing!) were finally installed in the house.

I was born in Phoenix in 1940 (probably the majority of people in our city had refrigerators). We moved to a housing project for low-income (poor) people and we had an ice box.  It was a real eye-opener for us!  I was nine years old and it was my job to put the quarter on the ice box and the "card" in the window, designating what size ice block we wanted.  A stranger came into our apartment once a week and delivered the ice (no one was home).  In less than a year my mother was able to "rent-to-buy" a "real" refrigerator.  It had a meter on it and every Friday she would come home from work with seven quarters. Each quarter would keep the refrigerator running for a day.  We three little girls each got (2) quarters and my mother had one. When the refrigerator was paid off, the meter was removed.

icesign2.thumb.jpg.451e0c4bde7a2b40430e4e7786008c71.jpg

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5 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

I was born in Phoenix in 1940 (probably the majority of people in our city had refrigerators). We moved to a housing project for low-income (poor) people and we had an ice box.  It was a real eye-opener for us!  I was nine years old and it was my job to put the quarter on the ice box and the "card" in the window, designating what size ice block we wanted.  A stranger came into our apartment once a week and delivered the ice (no one was home).  In less than a year my mother was able to "rent-to-buy" a "real" refrigerator.  It had a meter on it and every Friday she would come home from work with seven quarters. Each quarter would keep the refrigerator running for a day.  We three little girls each got (2) quarters and my mother had one. When the refrigerator was paid off, the meter was removed.

icesign2.thumb.jpg.451e0c4bde7a2b40430e4e7786008c71.jpg

I LOVE stories like the one you posted, my mother who was born in 1932 used to tell me fantastic stories about the knife sharpener that would walk up and down the alley behind her house, the live kosher chicken her mother would keep with a string tied around one leg and the other end to a leg of a kitchen chair till her mother would take to the butcher, renting a room during WWII to a couple who would come to introduce her to her future husband, they were so broke but her stories were so colorful her eyes would light up telling them.  Sorry so off topic.

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8 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

It was a chance meeting on Tinder.  She and Jahoon "talked" for three months and then he decided to visit Deavan. It was actually a one-night stand and she was "lucky enough" to get pregnant.  So...she didn't select him from a group of South Koreans.  Also, he probably was a sweet soul online and he's a LIAR!

 

Again, one-night stand and he was supposedly wearing a condom.  Deavan needs to hurry back to the USA, get a job, and forget about "romance" for awhile.

You know, I really don't believe it.  I think that's the go-to excuse for the couple that gets pregnant rather stupidly but wants everyone to think they were responsible.  In addition, Plan B is over the counter now even if Utah. If they are actively trying to prevent a pregnancy and a condom breaks, that's a solid option.  

My guess is both of them are stupid people who thought an oops pregnancy would be so exciting!

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21 hours ago, TwirlyGirly said:

That's certainly true of Deavan. She said Jihoon did wear a condom but it fell off.

Kalani, not so much. I did some research on Plan B in Samoa and it's very difficult to get there. You have to go to one clinic to get it.

As for pregnancy #2, Kalani isn't the brightest bulb when it comes to contraception. Recall she said she couldn't use birth control while breastfeeding - and that simply isn't true. I'll bet, if asked, she'd say Plan B is an abortifacient...

Although you could argue anyone that ignorant about birth control who can't afford a baby probably shouldn't be having sex at all - and I'd agree with that!

I think Kalani just wanted two children, same father.  I think she hoped she could tolerate Asuelo enough to have two kids with him.  And he's proving to be intolerable.  I really don't believe it was a mistake for her.

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1 hour ago, Boo Boo said:

I think Kalani just wanted two children, same father.  I think she hoped she could tolerate Asuelo enough to have two kids with him.  And he's proving to be intolerable.  I really don't believe it was a mistake for her.

I agree with this. I think a lot of women realize after kid 1 the guy isn’t shit/won’t be a good dad, but they want two children.
 

Women can be as sexually lazy as men, AND it’s more socially acceptable for a woman to have all her kids by the same father. Easier to have the second child by a man that’s already there, than having to hunt down more sperm, and then deal with him, his issues, an entire other set of extended family etc. 

 

I can see Kalani & Asuelu divorcing some time in the next 10yrs, and Kalani will likely marry again, but she will be pleased that her kids are by the same man no matter how many times she gets married. 

 

1 hour ago, Boo Boo said:

You know, I really don't believe it.  I think that's the go-to excuse for the couple that gets pregnant rather stupidly but wants everyone to think they were responsible.  In addition, Plan B is over the counter now even if Utah. If they are actively trying to prevent a pregnancy and a condom breaks, that's a solid option.  

My guess is both of them are stupid people who thought an oops pregnancy would be so exciting!

I also agree with you here. The way these people act medical contraception has a 50% success rate rather than 99.9%, which if that were true a heterosexual woman in our society would have an average of 6-8live births in her life time rather than 2.4!
 

Yet all these women manage to not have more than 2 or 3 children and all the women who don’t want children manage not to be pregnant....ummmmmmmm. 
 

Likey Deavan and Jihoon wanted to have sex, did so, and Deavan became pregnant. Same think with Kalani and Asuelu. These people all know how reproduction works. 

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10 hours ago, Kayz Opinion said:

It was a chance meeting on Tinder.  She and Jahoon "talked" for three months and then he decided to visit Deavan. It was actually a one-night stand and she was "lucky enough" to get pregnant.

I thought they were the couple who spent at least a week of sexy time in a "hot sheet motel" and she found she was pregnant even before he returned to S Korea (which fueled suspicions that another Korean was the baby's father.) 

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5 minutes ago, magemaud said:

I thought they were the couple who spent at least a week of sexy time in a "hot sheet motel" and she found she was pregnant even before he returned to S Korea (which fueled suspicions that another Korean was the baby's father.) 

Jihoon came to Utah after meeting Deavan online, they had sex right away and she took a pregnancy test before he went home. I assume it wasn’t “one night” as the purpose of his visit was a romantic/sexual one. 

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17 hours ago, Baltimore Betty said:

I LOVE stories like the one you posted, my mother who was born in 1932 used to tell me fantastic stories about the knife sharpener that would walk up and down the alley behind her house, the live kosher chicken her mother would keep with a string tied around one leg and the other end to a leg of a kitchen chair till her mother would take to the butcher, renting a room during WWII to a couple who would come to introduce her to her future husband, they were so broke but her stories were so colorful her eyes would light up telling them.  Sorry so off topic.

I forgot about the knife sharpener.  I think I saw one only twice in my life.  He rode a bicycle and walked up to everyone's front door. When he got a customer (he sharpened knives, some tools, and scissors), he would put a stand on the back wheel ... lifting it off the ground, then he "rode" the pedals--to make some kind of sharpening band turn.  I was 6 and 7, so I don't remember exactly.  We visited our grandmother in St. Louis in the late 40s when everyone had cars, but there was a "ragman" who had a horse pulling his wagon and he'd sing about rags.  I guess people took  some of their junk to him but I never saw anyone do it.

 

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13 hours ago, Scarlett45 said:

Jihoon came to Utah after meeting Deavan online, they had sex right away and she took a pregnancy test before he went home. I assume it wasn’t “one night” as the purpose of his visit was a romantic/sexual one. 

Bolding is mine.  Sorry, I'm the one who said "one night."  I meant she got pregnant within hours of meeting him in person.     I got the information from "Soap Dirt," that extremely reliable publication.  For the record, that's sarcasm.  They write, "Jihoon Lee and Deavan Clegg were able to turn things around over a nice meal at McDonald’s. The couple then spent the rest of the day hanging out at their hotel. The couple ended their first day together by making their son Taeyang Lee. Fans already know what happened next. The pair became a part of the cast of The Other Way.

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On 7/14/2020 at 11:20 AM, libgirl2 said:

Is she capable of taking care of a child? 

No. I'm hoping the kid might end up adopted by an intelligent person or couple. This girl seems like something is not quite right.

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On 7/15/2020 at 7:07 PM, spunky said:

I just can't with her, telling us how she's attracted to Asian men, blah, blah, blah. Ok, great, have at it like bunnies, but for God's sake be careful!  Now this season she tells us that actually she tried to be careful, but oops the condom fell off. Sure, Jan.

Who is Jan? I am really behind on episodes, I guess. Jan from which country?

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11 hours ago, Ucross said:

Who is Jan? I am really behind on episodes, I guess. Jan from which country?

"Jan" is a character in the old Brady Bunch TV show.  When her sister was doubting what Jan was saying (like the claptrap that comes out of Deavan's mouth), her sister (Marcia) would look at her in an exasperated way and say, "Sure, Jan."

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All of the American women have exactly the same attitude as Angela about feeling entitled as an American in a foreign country to live as if they were still in the US.  They're not as crude and boisterous, but less honest about their expectations.  And we, as middle-class Americans (mostly) kind of go along with this attitude by saying well, it's a third-world country, or it's a poor country.  The thing is, none of these women is in a relationship with a wealthy man.  The men they are dating, pregnant by or married to might well be living a middle-class life in their own countries, and we just don't recognize it.  Many of us have traveled to the countries on this show, but has anyone here really lived a middle-class life in Nigeria?  I'm wondering if these men are not as poverty-stricken--by the standards of their countries--as they seem to us.

We have Walmarts and Targets and all kinds of places where people who are not wealthy can afford to buy nice clothes, shoes, furniture, air conditioners, so that's maybe what we expect to see overseas.  But we are such a consumer-driven culture that the value we put on these things, these comforts, just aren't as important in countries where religious customs, family relationships, obligations to one's community are.  I suspect that when most of us travel abroad, if we can afford it, we stay in nice hotels and use services to make our visit comfortable in the ways we're accustomed to.  We don't eat meat or fish that's sat out all day in a hot market, with flies crawling all over it, because refrigerators are generally not a luxury here, even for relatively poor people.  Do middle-class people in Ethiopia have refrigerators, or do they go to the market every day to buy food for one day only?

I'm sorry to rant so, and I probably didn't make myself clear.  But it's occurring to me that, once again, we are being manipulated by TLC, and not in a good way.

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On 7/29/2020 at 3:22 PM, Mothra said:

All of the American women have exactly the same attitude as Angela about feeling entitled as an American in a foreign country to live as if they were still in the US.  They're not as crude and boisterous, but less honest about their expectations.  And we, as middle-class Americans (mostly) kind of go along with this attitude by saying well, it's a third-world country, or it's a poor country.  The thing is, none of these women is in a relationship with a wealthy man.  The men they are dating, pregnant by or married to might well be living a middle-class life in their own countries, and we just don't recognize it.  Many of us have traveled to the countries on this show, but has anyone here really lived a middle-class life in Nigeria?  I'm wondering if these men are not as poverty-stricken--by the standards of their countries--as they seem to us.

We have Walmarts and Targets and all kinds of places where people who are not wealthy can afford to buy nice clothes, shoes, furniture, air conditioners, so that's maybe what we expect to see overseas.  But we are such a consumer-driven culture that the value we put on these things, these comforts, just aren't as important in countries where religious customs, family relationships, obligations to one's community are.  I suspect that when most of us travel abroad, if we can afford it, we stay in nice hotels and use services to make our visit comfortable in the ways we're accustomed to.  We don't eat meat or fish that's sat out all day in a hot market, with flies crawling all over it, because refrigerators are generally not a luxury here, even for relatively poor people.  Do middle-class people in Ethiopia have refrigerators, or do they go to the market every day to buy food for one day only?

I'm sorry to rant so, and I probably didn't make myself clear.  But it's occurring to me that, once again, we are being manipulated by TLC, and not in a good way.

No you’re right. Expectations are EVERYTHING. What someone is used to in the USA regarding amenities and privacy and consumable goods may not be the standard or expected for an “typical” person living somewhere else. Also the amount of time and energy one is expected to spend on their extended family varies greatly from place to place. 
 

Assuming things will be very similar to how they are in the USA and if they are not that means that your partner has deceived you is very emotionally immature. 

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