S08.E10: D Day Comes Early

[watchingtvaddict]

1 hour ago, Ilovepie said:

I do not love Kate. Her mumbling indecisiveness and inability to straight up call out this jackass is extremely frustrating to watch. Grow a spine lady! Her sad sack Eeyore act is growing tedious to watch. When he said “make the best of it” why the hell didn’t she speak up?  She knows that is a shit answer, but she didn’t say that’s not good enough for me, I’m done. I’m sick of both of them. He is disgusting and she is annoying.

To me, AJ’s temper is not the worst thing about him. I am more offput by him speaking on behalf of Steph like she is incapable of answering for herself. In spite of that, I think they’ll make it. At least I hope they do.

And what is this fuckery of a getaway where they are all together?!? That’s how you know this show has crossed into absolute reality garbage. These people are not friends. They did not sign up to be on Big Brother or the Surreal Life or Real World. This is for drama only to force them to do this and this is not what people who watch this show are looking for. I’m with AJ - get shitfaced and go to town - that’s what production is looking for, right? 

Sorry for all the bad language. This show makes me crazy.......

I am so looking forward to next week. A.J seems to have had it with the production company. I think when they were driving  to the airport he was getting angry at a production car, too... but they decided to focus on the directions drama in the promo. I wonder if they decided to do the 1 airbnb for all 4 couples as punishment for A.J complaining? 

I think Steph wasn't speaking up about production because she doesn't want to cause a scene with her "employers" she probably does agree with his frustrations, but she seems so "easy-going" (or at least wants to appear so) she doesn't want to rock the boat on any front. Steph needs to learn how to speak up for herself. Or at least have an honest conversation with A.J about how it doesn't bother her as much as him and he needs to remember they have gained both money AND a new spouse and it's ONLY for 7 weeks. A.J needs to have some perspective about his current situation. 

[silverspoons]

3 hours ago, aphroditewitch said:

I think you make a lot of important points. Then added to the filming the cast is apparently still working their normal jobs, which makes MAFS very different from a lot of other reality shows because those participants usually have to take leave or something. The filming and retakes are why I laugh when people claim that the couples are getting a free vacation. But not so much because so much of the time is taken up with filming. On these shows, your time is not your own. And production is hoping for meltdowns because meltdowns are supposedly great tv.  The Bachelor is notorious for having a ton of alcohol around but not food, I read about a contestant that complained that if she was hungry she had to eat a hot pocket because there was little food around. On MAFS I guess production can't stop them from grabbing a snack from their kitchen if filming in the home but I'm sure they get a hard time about it. 

You would be surprised at what they will let you do. These shows make you sign super long contracts so I'll be a bit general because they honestly give you a minute to sign or they move on when you are just watching or in the background of filming. I live where it is Las Vegas weather, not in Vegas but close enough it is the same hot weather. My child was walking home from school with her BF and they said, they are filming TV today in our neighborhood. They wanted you to dress like it was cold out if you wanted to be in the background.  I took them to film, thinking it would be about an hour at the most. We were trapped, security all around till after midnight, my husband and my child's friend parents were not allowed to the area, We were starving  , some neighbor gave us cookies and water. It was over 10 hours to get what I think is a 8 minute clip. You would think I would have learned my lesson, when my teenager's favorite show was taping nearby. My husband brought him to watch and they would not allow food in the filming area. They did not have or sell food and it was 115 out, no water. They did allow people to leave. My husband and son were right behind the camera so hey did make them stay for 3 retakes and then they left because they were just dying of thirst. These two examples were major networks. I have seen TLC , natgeo, A&E tape as well and is it even more low budget if possible.

I do think it is how you treat the crew filming on a show like MAFS that matters. If you treat them like family and welcome them, you might catch more breaks. Some of the crew filming might hate their assignment. Philly is probably a cool place to be assigned for 2 months? I know most the crews assigned to where I live hate it. There are no bars, hot weather, crappy hotels, dull, landlocked. It seems like most of the MAFS people have not complained at filming too much, so maybe it is AJ or maybe they got a cameraman that does not want to be in Philly or just conflicting personalities? AJ said he has been in production before, maybe he wants to be in control or change things and the camera crew is not authorized or annoyed?

I hope AJ will write a blog or have a podcast post show about what he thinks about filming. i would just like to know more about how MAFS filming really works. My gut says things like that if an expert has time or is near you and wants to visit, you have to drop everything and tape or they come over and say we need the husband to cook today or the wife to take walk with a friend and that is just what has to happen for the storyline.

[Yeah No]

Will wants a sexy librarian while Jasmine wants traditional cleavage baring lingerie.  Will is too much of an idealist and Jasmine is too much of a realist.  Both need to meet in the middle.  They are both right to a degree.  I think they are polar opposites in some ways but instead of their differences making them coming together, it's polarizing them even more.

Steph is holding so much inside that I wonder how long it will be before the dam breaks and she unleashes her justified pent up anger and frustration at AJ.  I don't think he would be able to handle it, and she knows that, so that's why she walks on eggshells with him.  She worries that if she does he'll start in on her and the relationship will come crashing down.  All is well only as long as she keeps up the facade, but there's only so long anyone can live like that.  The fact that she hasn't even leaked a little bit of it out here and there is a bad sign.  She is not comfortable allowing him to see what she doesn't like about him - not even a little bit.  That's partly because of something about her that makes her uncomfortable with doing so, but also because of some danger she senses about him.  She knows she can't do it or he will take out all that anger on HER.  If you are that afraid to let such important feelings out in front of your partner, something is very, very wrong in the relationship.  I'm afraid that even if they are encouraged to so so by the therapist it won't improve things enough between them.

I agree with those above that say it's obvious why AJ is in business for himself - he has difficulty with authority.  With him it seems like that also means he's not a team player at all.  You have to see your relationship with your spouse as a team effort and be willing to take some authority from each other.  Steph is intuitively not giving him reason to see her as an authority figure because she knows he will start acting like an angry, sullen, petulant child with HER not just the production crew.  But eventually we all side-seat drive and one day after the honeymoon phase of the relationship is over it will hit him in the wrong place and all of that rage will be focused on HER.  I can just hear the "Who are you, my MOTHER?" comments from him now.

Kate is probably coming off more wishy-washy because she knows what she WOULD do if she didn't have the contract waving over her head that threatens to withhold significant money if she walks away now.  Oh sure, Dr. Jessica will support her if she chooses to leave, but Kate knows the show will screw her financially.  So she knows what she WOULD do if there wasn't that pesky contract, but of course she isn't going to actually DO it.  She just wants to make it clear to the world in a kind of desperate "help me" kind of way that you do behind your hostage taker's back as a sign to the world that you're really being held against your will.  I found it really telling when Puke told her he didn't know what to do.  I think he said that because he too is stuck in a nowhere situation because he is also feeling forced by the contract to play along with the "process" until the end.  Like others have said, I wouldn't be surprised if he's not living there by now.

Edited March 7, 2019 by Yeah No

[aphroditewitch]

6 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

Or at least have an honest conversation with A.J about how it doesn't bother her as much as him and he needs to remember they have gained both money AND a new spouse and it's ONLY for 7 weeks. A.J needs to have some perspective about his current situation. 

I don't think they make as much as people think they are. They get paid something because the show has to pay them because they are working but I have doubts they are getting these large amounts I see people posting about. 

[Empress1]

6 hours ago, silverspoons said:

I took them to film, thinking it would be about an hour at the most. We were trapped, security all around till after midnight, my husband and my child's friend parents were not allowed to the area, We were starving  , some neighbor gave us cookies and water. It was over 10 hours to get what I think is a 8 minute clip. [snip] My gut says things like that if an expert has time or is near you and wants to visit, you have to drop everything and tape or they come over and say we need the husband to cook today or the wife to take walk with a friend and that is just what has to happen for the storyline.

I think you're right. I remember Amber made a reference to the "process" last season. She said something like "I've been working my full-time job AND taking part in this process," which I always assumed meant filming the show. There were a couple of times where the participants would reference their group gatherings as "meetings." On the show Married to Medicine, there was a big blow-up on the reunion where the cast agreed that filming the show was akin to working a full-time job. Everyone on that cast works full-time outside the home in demanding professions (medicine, IT, one is a talk show host) except two wives who are housewives, so that's a lot of work. You could tell that Will's outing with his friends was set up - I mean, I'm sure they're his real friends, but I'd also bet he had to call around like "Listen, the show needs me to talk about how Jasmine doesn't support my coaching, can you have a beer with me at 2:00?" 

Not to mention that the MAFS cast probably has to use their PTO for these trips and outings the show makes them go on. So you may end up using all your vacation time, working at BEST a part-time job on top of your full-time job, and married to someone who sucks.

53 minutes ago, aphroditewitch said:

I don't think they make as much as people think they are.

I don't think they are either. There's no evidence of that; the only time the show has mentioned money is when they said "the experts" gave them $10K last season (and I wondered then if they had to give it back if they divorced). I remember reading something written by one of the people in the Australia cast and he said he LOST money doing the show - and ended up divorced, to add insult to injury. And if the goal is to be a reality show celebrity, there are other shows that are more likely to get you there than this. Apparently Contestants on The Bachelor(ette) aren't paid anything to be on the show and that's more well-known, highly rated, is on a bigger network, and has been on much longer than this show.

[Neurochick]

On 3/6/2019 at 12:14 AM, princelina said:

Because he wants to be the one to dump her, of course.

Totally right.  Luke doesn't want to be the one who "failed" so he's willing to stay in the "marriage."  I think that Kate also doesn't want to be a "failure" especially since this is on TV.  Someone needs to tell Luke that love and caring are VERBS.  You can tell someone you care for them and treat them like shit.  That's what he's doing.  Luke's not gay IMO, he's just a hipster asshole who wants to be Insta-famous.

Will and Jasmine need to hang it up.  I get what Jasmine wants, but she won't get it from Will.  Maybe she's seen so many women who wind up having to do everything because they're with men who don't want to be the provider.  Nothing wrong with that, she just won't get it from Will.  

[lh25]

On 3/6/2019 at 6:43 AM, configdotsys said:

On another note: Tomorrow is a HUGE DAY for me as I will find out if I am in remission and can return to work. It has been 15 months of pure hell. Please keep your fingers crossed for me.  I will be a nervous wreck from now until tomorrow's appointment.

Fingers and toes crossed for good news.  That waiting is the hardest part.

[Neurochick]

19 hours ago, lids said:

I remember when Steph said that in her previous relationships, things start out great and then go downhill and the guy cheats on her, forcing her to break up with him.  I see the same pattern in her relationship with AJ.  She's playing cool girl right now so that AJ thinks she's perfect and that the relationship is great, but all the cracks are already there.  She's either going to get fed up and start getting real by pointing out his annoying behavior and AJ's going to say she's changed and start cheating on her.  Or she's going to check out emotionally from the relationship and he's going to start looking for validation elsewhere and he is going to cheat on her.  She should be more real from the beginning so the guy can get to know the real her and she should also weed out losers like AJ way earlier.  She just wants a relationship, so she's playing it cool on a lot of red flags.

AJ really freaked me out this episode, especially when Dr. Jessica was talking to Stephanie and AJ answered.  I was like, STFU asshole and let your wife talk.  He's pissing me off, I would have told him to fuck off weeks ago.  

[MV713]

16 hours ago, Retired at last said:

I agree about Puke's secret. It is going to be another story he made up, just like the drunk friend. I do not think they had sex. She would look happier and that wouldn't be Luke's secret. It would be their secret. I wish it would be that he told her he was gay, but I am sure it isn't. At least then she wouldn't keep beating herself up for not being attractive to him. 

I do hope we get a mini-honeymoon intervention and the guys (and Kristine) take Puke out for a walk and we never see him again.

see I think that they do have sex - because she has that "after sexy time" smiley face and touchiness with him in the previews for next week when they are dressing (badly) for the ballet.  Of course I could be totally wrong and that wouldn't be a surprise 🙂

[Neurochick]

Gosh, I hope Kate didn't have sex with Luke, yuk, the thought of him having sex with anybody grosses me out, and I'm neither a prude nor do I have a weak stomach.

[Retired at last]

I would rather think that Luke's secret is something like he told her that he killed the last woman who didn't agree with him, so she better not divorce him until he is ready!

I hope that Kate's happy face in the previews for next week is just from his pretending to be appreciative of how she is dressed (other than her ignoring the "you're wearing that?" comment). She just looked giddy to me that he is being nice and spending time with her. There he goes, getting her all hopeful again!

[Booger666]

I’m beginning to think the reason the MAFS cast is silent on social media is due to AJ.  I bet production got nervous about how easily AJ flies off the handle and his hatred of production.  Combine that with his contempt for the “experts” with their bad advice and insider knowledge of really awful matches and production probably came up with a doozy of a contract to shut him up.  If AJ were allowed to be on social media right now can you imagine the tea he would spill?  I bet Kristine would have a lot to say about how awful Luke was to Kate, too.

[aphroditewitch]

I feel like the secret is that they actually split off screen early on and while Kate was willing to deal with things as far as on camera obligations , Luke just blew things off and wanted to be a dick about everything. Which would explain why she was so upset about the anniversary stuff. 

[forevertwentynine]

On 3/5/2019 at 10:30 PM, PupCal said:

Kristine's gonna keep putting off having kids 'til you are an old man, Keith.

Or at least just a man.  Of course he wants kids... they are fun for him, because he watched women raise everyone and do everything for him, so he just thinks that she's going to do it all too.  He needs to really grow up.

[ohcomeon]

I'm still really struggling with Jasmine's perspective on the husband being the "provider".

I could understand if she says that she wants to be a stay at home mom/spouse and wants a husband who agrees and supports that family arrangement. But she seems to imply that she wants to continue working.

I could understand if she was saying that she thinks she'd eventually resent having to pay more than 50% of the bills because she makes more than her husband. But instead she is saying that she wants her spouse to pay all the household bills. 

Back in the early '70's my mom started working part time. My Dad was from the generation that the wife working meant the husband could not adequately provide for the family so he refused to allow mom to pay for any household bills. Instead her income went to "niceties" like more clothes for us, dining out, or trips that we normally wouldn't take. Dad was such a nut that when Mom decided to buy her own car in the late '70's, Dad refused to ride in it. But geez, that was 50 years ago and that mentality was dying out then... even though my sisters and I still joke with our husbands that we were raised with the expectation that "our money" is our money and their money is our money. But I really think Jasmine wants to live out that scenario today. Are there still couples who operate that way?

[Ilovepie]

1 hour ago, ohcomeon said:

Are there still couples who operate that way?

I think the answer is maybe? Maybe not? I think there are a lot of different set ups with how couples handle their money, and whatever works in your family is fine. I also think how couples handle bill paying usually happens organically as your relationship progresses, and sometimes things change as circumstances change (see your own story about your mom getting a job!).

The problem here is that this is not an organic relationship, and these people are strangers who have completely different goals and ideas of how this should be handled. Even worse for their relationship, both are entrenched in their idea of what is the right way to handle money. This is a total mismatch. She wants a sugar daddy to take care of her, and he wants more of a partner. Although I think she's crazy, neither is wrong if they were with someone who feels the same, but that's not the case. The other red flag that came up this week is that he is willing to somewhat sacrifice on the financial end to pursue his dreams, and she is not. These two will never work.

[Neurochick]

I like her take on AJ and Luke...well on all the couples.

[Ilovepie]

4 hours ago, forevertwentynine said:

He needs to really grow up.

@forevertwentynine - I laughed at this statement juxtaposed with your screen name :-0

But seriously, he does......someone who is still going to school and underemployed should not be considering kids, especially if your spouse, i.e. the one who has to birth said child, is not ready to have one!

[Stinamaia]

On 3/6/2019 at 11:53 AM, configdotsys said:

Thank you very much for the good wishes. Just to clarify. My appointment is tomorrow, Thursday. I was watching this on DVR this morning and taking notes. Sorry for being unclear. 

Best wishes for today then! 

[Marley GMA]

Puke saying that she (Kate) does do a few things that are attractive to him. I mean WTH.  So now he can say that he did compliment her during the marriage. GAG

[krbr51]

I am going to call complete shenanigans on Kate and Luke. The show is messing with us (the viewer).  I suspect it's almost as bad as the manipulation they did  with Jon and Molly.  For this entire episode Kate was in her pajamas. She was in her pajamas in the morning, while talking to her friend, while on the phone with Jessica and when finally confronting Luke. I don't actually think she spends her life living in her pajamas.  The show had to have been edited totally out of sequence or all those events happened within a very brief period of time.   She was probably never given the opportunity to actually go get dressed.  Also, consider the other two couples had a face-to-face visit with Jessica.  Kate only got a phone call from her. I suspect it's because again it was all edited out of sequence.  (Perhaps she spoke with Jessica right after Puke left on their anny).
My suspicion is that this all happened on the day of their anniversary, right through her telling Luke she wants a divorce.  And the clip at the beginning, when she was on her way to work, was actually the next morning.  

I would also like to point out that we now know that Kate has been keeping a secret for Puke. Maybe I've been watching too much Finding Neverland, but in keeping his secret, that makes them a team.  No matter how dysfunctional.  He has told her a secret, so now she has been put in the position of "protecting" him and his secret.  The secret gives her a false sense of closeness to him.   Obviously, this is all a manipulation.   She does refer to him as manipulative in interviews, but I would bet these are all interviews taped much, much later.  Even Pepper referred to him at manipulative on Unfiltered.  But again, that's much after the fact.

The experts all seem to have his number.  All three experts have been harder on Luke than any other previous contestant (except maybe Molly).  Jessica basically told her that it was okay to leave and Kate still isn't sure.  But up until now, the experts don't know about the secret.  Once the "secret" is out, I think that's when they will start identifying his behavior as manipulation.

Perhaps the group honeymoon was set up to insulate Kate a bit.  The other contestants are aware of what he's doing and they might be willing to call him out on his behavior.  Kate won't be as vulnerable to his manipulations in a larger group, either.  This theory could also hold true for Steph and AJ.   Yes, it's good drama, but it could also serve another purpose. 

Also - I'm not a Jas fan, but I felt bad for her this week.  Who cooks in a nighty?  And then the camera panned to his arm/hand during the kissing exercise to show that he wasn't reacting AT ALL.  

[Yeah No]

7 hours ago, MV713 said:

see I think that they do have sex - because she has that "after sexy time" smiley face and touchiness with him in the previews for next week when they are dressing (badly) for the ballet.  Of course I could be totally wrong and that wouldn't be a surprise 🙂

I agree with you.  I think Kate exhibits signs of the vulnerability that scientific tests find in women after they've had sex with a man.  A woman secretes more oxytocin during sex than a man, and that's been called the "love drug".  It's been theorized that his is what makes a women in general feel more attached to a man after having sex.

[LennieBriscoe]

First of all, I can't believe I forgot to watch this episode until TODAY! (I KNOW!!)

Secondly, Kate, WTH? Next show you're holding hands with King Jerk?! Oh, he CARES about you. You must own many bridges, sister. (D-I-V-O-R-C-E, Find out just how free you'll be! Sock it to him, sock it to him,.....)

And AJ isn't looking too swell per Preview, either!

Whoever said Stephanie resembles Beavis: I hate you. 😄

Edited March 7, 2019 by LennieBriscoe

[Yeah No]

6 hours ago, ohcomeon said:

Back in the early '70's my mom started working part time. My Dad was from the generation that the wife working meant the husband could not adequately provide for the family so he refused to allow mom to pay for any household bills. Instead her income went to "niceties" like more clothes for us, dining out, or trips that we normally wouldn't take. Dad was such a nut that when Mom decided to buy her own car in the late '70's, Dad refused to ride in it. But geez, that was 50 years ago and that mentality was dying out then... even though my sisters and I still joke with our husbands that we were raised with the expectation that "our money" is our money and their money is our money. But I really think Jasmine wants to live out that scenario today. Are there still couples who operate that way?

I grew up in the '60s and '70s and my mom went back to work when I was 9, first part time, then full time when I was 10.  My grandma looked after me.  My father was a very progressive guy and didn't have any problem with it.  My mother bought her own car in 1966 and Dad was thrilled.  I know that both my parents were ahead of their time. 

As for the show, I think Jasmine would probably want a joint account for bills, but she would just not have to put as much in it as she expects from Will.  In the beginning she said she wanted a 70-30 split on the bills, and in either this episode or last week's she said she was willing to be more flexible about money.  I don't know how sincere she is about that, but that's what she said.  I think when she originally said 70-30, perhaps it was with the assumption that her husband would make more money than her.  I don't know if I can argue with her on that expectation based on statistics.  Since women on the average still make 80.5 cents on the dollar as men and it's worse depending on the state (it's actually worse in PA), plus the pay gap is even wider for black women, her expectation may not be completely unrealistic.  I suspect that the real problem between them is that Will might make less than she does, and she wants a guy that makes more.  Given that she probably doesn't make that much I can understand why she would feel that way.

[LennieBriscoe]

Remind me again what exactly Jasmine brings to the table,  besides a healthy appetite? (Oh,  no,  she di'n't! Yes; yes, I did.)

Edited March 8, 2019 by LennieBriscoe

[KateHearts]

On 3/5/2019 at 10:17 PM, Melig8r said:

Poor Steph apparently isn't allowed to speak.  AJ speaks for both of them.

Exactly.  And what the hell was Dr. Jessica doing just sitting there, allowing him to steamroll over the entire discussion.  Any reasonable therapist (or person) would have interjected and said, "Let Stephanie speak for herself about this. I want to hear her view."

Luke is so disgusting.  "She is letting the upsetting first week color her attitude about the whole marriage" (I'm paraphrasing). You have given her NOTHING. You told her she disgusted you. You go out with your friends and leave her alone. Then somehow it's about HER attitude?  You didn't have any idea she felt badly? Please.  She needs to say, "YOU HAVE BEEN A JERK FROM THE BEGINNING."  But instead she whimpers and trails off and won't just tell him that he's a hurtful, phony douchebag.

[Elizzikra]

Quote

Remind me again what exactly Jasmine brings to the table,  besides a healthy appetite? (Oh,  no,  she di'n't! Yes; yes, I did.)

I really don't like her but...

I think that Jasmine is attractive. She is college educated, employed and unencumbered (no children). I think she owns her home. so she is not without her positive qualities; I just don't think they outweigh the more unpleasant features of her personality. 

[forevertwentynine]

4 hours ago, Ilovepie said:

@forevertwentynine - I laughed at this statement juxtaposed with your screen name :-0

🤣 Touche 

I've raised my kid... and now we're about the same maturity at 19.  LOL 

[aphroditewitch]

1 hour ago, KateHearts said:

Exactly.  And what the hell was Dr. Jessica doing just sitting there, allowing him to steamroll over the entire discussion.  Any reasonable therapist (or person) would have interjected and said, "Let Stephanie speak for herself about this. I want to hear her view."

Or they just edited Stephanie's statements out. This is MAFS after all and they need to make A.J. look as volatile as possible. 

[watchingtvaddict]

10 hours ago, Kmascio5660 said:

Puke saying that she (Kate) does do a few things that are attractive to him. I mean WTH.  So now he can say that he did compliment her during the marriage. GAG

He makes these vague statements but can't back them up. WHAT DO YOU FIND ATTRACTIVE ABOUT KATE, LUKE?  It is the same with the drinking comment "She drinks to much"... please give us an example. This way Kate can change her behaviour... but then again thinking about it. When he complained about her smoking she said she would quit, so maybe he keeps it vague so she can't really do anything. 

[Booger666]

3 hours ago, watchingtvaddict said:

When he complained about her smoking she said she would quit, so maybe he keeps it vague so she can't really do anything. 

You make and interesting point.  Luke puts the blame on Kate (appearance, drinking, and probably more) about things that aren’t true (drinking) or she can’t change (appearance).  He is gaslighting her into believing it is her fault and there is nothing she can do.  He is maintaining control of the relationship while constantly making her “less than”.  What an ass!!

[Jax7917]

I think Stephanie and AJ are good together, mostly because she's so laid back and is very drama free, but he gives me bad vibes. I get that production must be super annoying, but that melt down about doing "homework" which was on week 1 was very telling. This whole thing was fresh and he was being so rude to them from day 2. He has a very bad temper and even when he's acting ultra happy, he comes off very fake and over the top. I feel bad for her because she seems so happy to have found a match that's so much like her and is down to do fun things, but then that temper comes out and she looks so disappointed.

[humbleopinion]

AJ is benefiting from Puke being such an asshat  and Jasmine being so obstinate or he would be getting the "bad" edit.

At best, AJ and SexyAF would be good candidates for couples therapy post MAFS and AJ for his own therapy because he really does seem sincere about his hope for the relationship working out...

The AJ apologies will get tiresome for Steph when he lashes out time and time again for the slightest disturbance in his universe...

AJ's irrational anger issues, his volume dial stuck on 11, the abhorrent decor and color scheme in his bachelor pad(poker chip and playing card art?), fear of solo dining...well... Steph has lots of things to consider if she stays in the marriage...

[Ilovepie]

3 hours ago, Booger666 said:

He is gaslighting her into believing it is her fault and there is nothing she can do.

Maybe she should give it back to him: “There are some things about you I find extremely unattractive.”

“What?”

“I can’t think of anything right now...Are you ok??? Don’t get upset.....”

[Jax7917]

Kate's stupidity is starting to overpower Luke's . No money in the world would make me stay married to that creep.

[Retired at last]

@krbr51, I don't think we know that Kate is keeping Luke's secret. All we saw is that she made a call to TELL someone about his secret, which means she does not intend to keep it. Again, we are putting a lot of thought as to what this secret could be and I am sure that anything we come up with is more interesting than what he has told her.

[Annamz]

On 3/5/2019 at 9:18 PM, Koalagirl said:

Did anyone catch the preview at the end of the episode where Kate is FaceTiming Dr. Pepper and told her that Luke has a secret he doesn’t want her to tell the experts? Hmmm what could that be?

That he's not into women. In all seriousness, Luke gives me a Ted Bundy vibe when he looks at Kate. I can't decide if it's disgust for just her or disgust for all women. 

[configdotsys]

7 hours ago, Booger666 said:

You make and interesting point.  Luke puts the blame on Kate (appearance, drinking, and probably more) about things that aren’t true (drinking) or she can’t change (appearance).  He is gaslighting her into believing it is her fault and there is nothing she can do.  He is maintaining control of the relationship while constantly making her “less than”.  What an ass!!

Seems Luke always looks for someone else to deflect attention to: bringing up Kate's drinking and all the gaslighting there, the comments about AJ back at the beginning when the four guys had their bachelor party and now bringing up AJ drinking in the preview. Not only does he point and comment about other people, he never says anything when he speaks. It's all doublespeak and questions and a psychotic face.

6 hours ago, Jaclyn88 said:

I think Stephanie and AJ are good together, mostly because she's so laid back and is very drama free, but he gives me bad vibes. I get that production must be super annoying, but that melt down about doing "homework" which was on week 1 was very telling. This whole thing was fresh and he was being so rude to them from day 2. He has a very bad temper and even when he's acting ultra happy, he comes off very fake and over the top. I feel bad for her because she seems so happy to have found a match that's so much like her and is down to do fun things, but then that temper comes out and she looks so disappointed.

Big baby who needs a diaper needs to realize that if it wasn't for production, he wouldn't have a wife.

4 hours ago, Jaclyn88 said:

Kate's stupidity is starting to overpower Luke's . No money in the world would make me stay married to that creep.

Totally agree. I'd tell them to sue me (not that I'd ever go on the show) but there is no way I'd put up with that for a minute.

2 hours ago, Retired at last said:

@krbr51, I don't think we know that Kate is keeping Luke's secret. All we saw is that she made a call to TELL someone about his secret, which means she does not intend to keep it. Again, we are putting a lot of thought as to what this secret could be and I am sure that anything we come up with is more interesting than what he has told her.

Kate saying that Luke did not want Kate to talk about whatever with the experts sounds like a secret that they are both involved in. If it was just Luke's secret, I think she would have said something like, "He doesn't want you to know this about him but..." I was thinking, like others here, that they did sleep together, but if they did, then she's even more of an ass to allow him to dictate that she keep that a secret. 

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

[red12]

On 3/6/2019 at 1:40 AM, silverspoons said:

Will says he wants to get another rental property or two for income stream and take a job as a coach. If this is his dream whether  it is with high school kids or he tries to go further, it is his dream. The way he explained it to his friends sounded more like he wanted to give back and with Jasmine he had to play up he could go far enough to make big money. It almost seemed like he was testing Jasmine, to see if she would be okay with less money or equal money (if he included the rental income).  Jasmine works in special education or with the disabled? so it is surprising she was upset with him wanting to take a job he loved and felt he could make a difference. Don't people who work with special needs or disabled people usually do it because it is a passion not for money?

So Keith seems like he is not stopping at nursing and still wants med school. He said 5-7 more years of school.  Then Kristine says she wants to grow her business and be a broker. I just do not see how this is possible? I was with my ex through med school and residency and only 1 person out of 110 people in the class stayed in the same city area for college , med school and residency and it was a legacy student who was going to work with their father's practice. The other 109 moved at least once if not twice.  Keith is saying he wants babies now. Where is an "expert" to tell him stop at nursing, you will have no debt , a good job, your wife can keep her business growing and you can have your babies. Instead he thinks he can spend 5-7 years in school and have babies and somehow it will all work, my guess is he thinks grandma will be the free baby sitter while Kristine works because he talks about dream vacations and then babies in the next sentence. I did my dream vacations before babies, because I did not want to leave my babies with even family for 2 weeks.

I think Luke is not living there anymore. I think he pops in for filming but he is back at his place. 

Can anyone explain to me why one would plan in the beginning to go to nursing school and then medical school? I understand being a nurse who decides to become a doctor, but why plan to do both? It doesn't make any sense. If Keith already has the undergrad prerequisites for medical school (I doubt it), he should take the MCAT and get on with medical school applications. If he wants to be a nurse, then why not go for Nurse Practitioner? Depending on his motivations a career as a Physician Assistant could be an option.

His plan, as shown, is not good and will amass an insurmountable amount of debt. I don't see him in an extremely demanding, high prestige specialty that will bring in the money to live comfortably and pay the school debts it seems he will rack up. It's as if he has never met with an academic adviser.

Edited March 8, 2019 by red12

[Lovecat]

15 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

CONGRATULATIONS!!!  I'm 8 months post surgery for melanoma and received 10 immunotherapy infusions as adjuvant ("just in case," to go after anything that might be hiding) before I had to be discontinued due to side effects I'm still trying to recover from.  Sounds like I haven't had it near as rough as you have, but I breathe a sigh of relief every time a CT or ultrasound come back clean, and am very much looking forward to celebrating a little bit at my 1-year cancer free mark in July.  Then a little more at 2 years...a little more at 3 years...you get the picture 🙂  ALL of my best wishes to you for continued good health and getting your life back!!

[silverspoons]

12 minutes ago, red12 said:

Can anyone explain to me why one would plan in the beginning to go to nursing school and then medical school? I understand being a nurse who decides to become a doctor, but why plan to do both? It doesn't make any sense. If Keith already has the undergrad prerequisites for medical school (I doubt it), he should take the MCAT and get on with medical school applications. If he wants to be a nurse, then why not go for Nurse Practitioner?

His plan, as shown, is just stupid and will amass an insurmountable amount of debt. I don't see him in an extremely demanding, high prestige specialty that will bring in enough dough to live comfortably and pay the school debts it seems like he will rack up. It's as if he has never met with an academic adviser.

I have been questioning this since the first episode.  He should at 30 be done with a bachelors (especially since he has been living rent free) and in medical school. With the health care and insurance changing being  a doctor is not what it used to be. Keith could exit as a nurse with no debt and make 70-80k. He could work as a nurse and take classes to become a nurse practioner and perhaps take on 30k in debt and make 120k or he could spend 4 years in medical school be in debt 200-250k, then work as a resident for 3-7 years for 50-60k and then make 220k (by this time he is over 40). With Kristine wanting to work too, medical school seems like the worst option, time wise, with extra debt.

The other thing is Kristine is complaining about his overnight shifts. Wait till he gets to 3-4th year of med school and then residency. That is 5 or more years of crazy hours and 24 hour shifts not just 3 overnights. Makes sense he should be a nurse practioner working in a clinic 8-5, this is the hours and life Kristine wants for a spouse. 

My gut says maybe Keith is big into gender roles and thinks men should not be nurses? or that his grandma has told him he can be a doctor and he is going to be a doctor no matter what. It is like Keith does not see the real world? or the facts that he is 30 and if he wants babies asap, 10 more years of school and training is not realistic. Kristine does not seem like a women that wants to be a  single mom while he is doing 24 hour rotations. I am a strong women, I had my graduate degree and a career and my ex being on 24 hour shifts for a few years was hard sometimes and I had no stress about money or kids.

[KateHearts]

26 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

Wow!   What wonderful news... congratulations! And here's to a much less hellish next 15 months...

[Empress1]

25 minutes ago, configdotsys said:

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

[KateHearts]

25 minutes ago, red12 said:

Can anyone explain to me why one would plan in the beginning to go to nursing school and then medical school? I understand being a nurse who decides to become a doctor, but why plan to do both? It doesn't make any sense. If Keith already has the undergrad prerequisites for medical school (I doubt it), he should take the MCAT and get on with medical school applications. If he wants to be a nurse, then why not go for Nurse Practitioner? Depending on his motivations a career as a Physician Assistant could be an option.

His plan, as shown, is not good and will amass an insurmountable amount of debt. I don't see him in an extremely demanding, high prestige specialty that will bring in the money to live comfortably and pay the school debts it seems he will rack up. It's as if he has never met with an academic adviser.

I agree with your thinking here. I am a Physician Assistant and it's a much longer (and massively more expensive) proposition to become a doctor, without adding on first becoming a nurse. Unless his undergrad grades are so abysmal that he feels becoming a nurse and getting some clinical experience under his belt may boost his chances of getting into med school

Still, he isn't a ball of fire and Medical School/residency/fellowship is grueling. He hasn't really expressed an interest in a certain subspecialty, but surgical and many other subspecialties are long and very competitive. PA school is very, very competitive and it's a tough 2-3 years- but it's a much shorter way to become a medical practitioner. Cost wise, it's similar to 2-3 years of med school. He's already in the 30y/o range; at this point, if he started med school now, he wouldn't be able to practice any sort of medicine until he was close to 40. Add 2-5 more years for more specialized training.

[Kiss my mutt]

I don’t believe for one minute Keith is going to medical school. He probably just likes to say it. 

[configdotsys]

1 hour ago, red12 said:

Can anyone explain to me why one would plan in the beginning to go to nursing school and then medical school? I understand being a nurse who decides to become a doctor, but why plan to do both? It doesn't make any sense. If Keith already has the undergrad prerequisites for medical school (I doubt it), he should take the MCAT and get on with medical school applications. If he wants to be a nurse, then why not go for Nurse Practitioner?

His plan, as shown, is just stupid and will amass an insurmountable amount of debt. I don't see him in an extremely demanding, high prestige specialty that will bring in enough dough to live comfortably and pay the school debts it seems like he will rack up. It's as if he has never met with an academic adviser.

I think it's a bogus claim. He's lazy and I find it hard to believe he'd put in the kind of time to become a nurse or a doctor. From the beginning of the season, he talked about what a couch potato he is. He never once mentioned nursing school coursework and that's just impossible to believe. Nursing school is hell. I have a bunch of friends who are nurses and they were basket cases in school because of the sheer volume of work. My guess is that he completed a certificate program to become a dialysis technician and may be taking more certificate based courses or AS programs in other areas that pay more. I think that is a fine career if you're happy with it and don't get why he feels the need to hint that he's doing much more than he really is.

Edited March 8, 2019 by configdotsys
error fix

[lh25]

2 hours ago, configdotsys said:

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

I am SO happy for you!!  Enjoy your life now.

[Soup333]

2 hours ago, configdotsys said:

P.S. I'm cancer free as of yesterday. Has not hit me yet. The last 15 months have been hellish. Thank you for all the good wishes.

Yay! Congratulations on being cancer free!! Wonderful news!

[gonecrackers]

I've read here they've fudged on people's careers in seasons, as in, changing their titles etc.  I don't trust the show reg. who does what or even what their future plans are; if it doesn't fit their story line somehow or cause some concern it probably won't be accurately relayed to the audience.

Jasmine, Jasmine... she might as well have served herself on that plate, naked, but it still wouldn't have made any impression on him.  Maybe it's the other disturbing content this season but I find her to be comic relief. Who asks someone, "So are you intellectually stimulated?"  - LOL. The timed kiss - Will obliged just to check it off the list of things he had to do before he could get some sleep.  Jasmine's attempt at Stepford did not impress, & they're not meant to be anything more than possible friends, so the whole thing was Awkward.

And although I've given Will credit for not jumping at some easy sex, I will say he should man up enough to let her know (behind the scenes) he's not interested at all instead of continuing to take advantage of her stellar homemaking skills.

I'm tired of Kate's loud (& dry) sobbing. I've said before they're playing roles; probably filmed that whole ordeal in her nightie for us in a few hours. They both need to go away- now.

A.J. seems way more relaxed & reasonable on Unfiltered. If he really answered *for* Steph & her words weren't just edited out (& it seems like he really did jump in there), someone needed to tell him to STFU, preferably Steph. Also, I understand he'd be irritated with production, but regardless of what was pissing him off his reactions show immaturity & lack of control. Hopefully, for Steph's sake, he's actually in cahoots with the show & playing us all.

Keith wanting kids now is shades of Jephte's baby fever before the season even finished. Hopefully there are not enough 'bonus baby bucks' for another MAFS season ending pregnancy announcement.

**Note, my comment on "bonus baby bucks" is speculative snark, but who knows...

[silverspoons]

2 hours ago, KateHearts said:

I agree with your thinking here. I am a Physician Assistant and it's a much longer (and massively more expensive) proposition to become a doctor, without adding on first becoming a nurse. Unless his undergrad grades are so abysmal that he feels becoming a nurse and getting some clinical experience under his belt may boost his chances of getting into med school

Still, he isn't a ball of fire and Medical School/residency/fellowship is grueling. He hasn't really expressed an interest in a certain subspecialty, but surgical and many other subspecialties are long and very competitive. PA school is very, very competitive and it's a tough 2-3 years- but it's a much shorter way to become a medical practitioner. Cost wise, it's similar to 2-3 years of med school. He's already in the 30y/o range; at this point, if he started med school now, he wouldn't be able to practice any sort of medicine until he was close to 40. Add 2-5 more years for more specialized training.

I think he said he wants to be a Nephrologist?  He had said something in an interview about being a doctor still working with people at the dialysis center. I would assume it would be nephrology and not urology? Nephrology is a 5 year residency and there are very limited spots at each hospital. 

They just opened a for profit medical school in my area (it seems like a HUGE mess), and is very easy to get into (way easier then a PA or NP program) so there are ways to go to medical school if you don't mind going into big debt and living in the middle of no where and paying for a "for profit" school. This medical school does not even have solid 3-4th year rotations , let alone residency matches. Crazy? I hope someone talks to Keith, maybe someone in Kristine's family is in healthcare and explains salary, debt, and jobs. I know 2 family practice doctors who have gone back to school recently to  become NP because of crazy high malpractice rates and better quality of life.