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S09.E03: The Jersey Breakfast Club


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As tensions mount between Melissa and Teresa, all the ladies head out to a cattle ranch in Oklahoma; Jackie shares shocking personal details; Melissa reveals a family secret, leading Teresa to explode and forcing all the ladies to choose sides.

Airs 11/21/18 at 9:00 PM Eastern

  • Love 4
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Did the Jennifer explanation of her eating disorder make sense?

She was anorexic for a really long time - even after her kids were born counting out their calories and then she just STOPPED?

No therapy? Not even to learn how to eat a bowl of soup?

  • Love 10
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Last week I was on Tre's side; and I still think Joe needs to make more time for his dad, or be honest about why he's not. But....Tre is blowing the whole thing out of proportion. There's no big conspiracy here. And she needs to take the issue up with Joe directly.

And Joe is no better. He was encouraging Melissa to speak for him.

Oh, and I found it rich how Teresa didn't want Jackie giving her two cents, but it's apparently fine for Dolores to do the same thing.

 

Polly's house is adorable. I love it. These women, turning their noses up at the camper and the whole state...not a good look. Kudos to Dolores for taking the camper.

 

I don't think I'm going to like Jennifer. She comes off as very small minded, shallow, and high maintenance. I loved when Margaret was all, "I'm not that obsessed with Chanel." 

I continue to relate to Jackie. I, too, struggled with an eating disorder in my youth. I appreciated hearing about her struggle. 

Melissa and her love-child sister? Girl, bye.

  • Love 19
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Teresa has a very valid gripe against Joe and Melissa - being the carer for an elderly parent, especially one who appears to be as difficult as her father and while she is a single parent, is incredibly difficult. Joe and Melissa have yet to present a real reason why they don't seem to be helping her in any way (and it seems like 'helping' in this case could many times be as simple as Joe picking up the phone a few times a week and calling his father). They blame her or her husband for putting these ideas about Joe ignoring his father in the father's head when it seems like the father could draw those conclusions himself.

 

Teresa's problem is that she cannot effectively argue her case. She just says the same thing over and over at increasing volume. Eventually she goes from being sympathetic to the villain because she can't respond to what the other side is saying, she just yells her one argument louder. She needs to bring Gia along with her anytime she has this 'conversation' with Joe and Melissa in order to even attempt to actually make any headway.

  • Love 19
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So Joe and the father saw each other when Melissa was hatchet throwing? As in when Tre was out of town? There's a common factor here too of Teresa not being around, very possibly to invite herself along. 

 

"I want my daughter to stay with her kids and love her husband "You want to sit in a boutique." Fuck off, Joe. Seriously. Nice to put down Melissa in front of all the kids. No wonder Gino is casually calling her "Melissa." Btw, didn't Mrs Gorga work? That's never added up to me with Joe's views. But I don't think math is Joe's strong point.

 

Melissa saying she had a half sister sounded like something she said before. I can't place where though. I know he's a felon and all, but Melissa mentioning the medium reminded me of an enjoyable Juicy moment not having any of that absolute  Bullshit when they saw a medium way back on a trip with Caroline, Kathy, etc. 

 

Have none of these women seen any female country artist anywhere to think they are so rare to OK? Wtf was with Jennifer talking about her love of Chanel and great house view then all of a sudden balking about $500 boots and watching money? Great to remember you came from humble beginnings, lead with that, not the bragging.

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23 minutes ago, ghoulina said:

don't think I'm going to like Jennifer. She comes off as very small minded, shallow, and high maintenance. I loved when Margaret was all, "I'm not that obsessed with Chanel." 

Really - Jennifer has already worn out her welcome! (With me at least.)

Edited by nexxie
  • Love 23
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My two cents on melissa/Joe/theresa.

Theresa thinks she still runs joes life. Theresa your brother is married. GET OVER IT

Why dont you go run your husbands life. When he gets OUT OF JAIL

*snap*

  • Love 23
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Melissa: false martyr and camera whore.

Miss me with her BS, please.

She is a disrespectful c-word and her husband is a lazy little shit who can't be bothered to fight his own battles, let alone spend time with his grieving dad. I wouldn't mind so much, but they both lie and expect everyone to pretend that their warped version of reality is true and they are good. I really despise them both. 

That trip was so tasteless. Of course they told no one. That's what you do when you have a guilty conscience. I'm sure Mel didn't care but Joey? Helen Keller could read that one from a mile away. 

Edited by thesupremediva1
  • Love 9
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I was team Tre last week but now... It's now Mel's job to bring Joey and his father closer together and Tre has no right to say that Mel is at fault.  That's a Gorga problem.  Tre wants it both ways.  Mel is not a Gorga but Mel is supposed to be a Gorga when Tre determines she is. 

What did Margaret call Jennifer when she one upped the host?  Yep.  Got that right.  Jenn was very annoying this episode.  I still don't think she's Peggy 2.0 but she's gone down in my book.

  • Love 9
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It's Joe pushing for a Mel-Tre confrontation, not Tre. Tre tries to talk to Joey. He ignores her and then bitches to his wife. These are facts.

In fact, the flashbacks only reinforce my dislike of him. Every time a scenario he doesn't like presents itself, he flies off the handle. Throws things, screams like a banshee, attacks Juicy... I could go on.

Mel saying Tre has more time because Juicy is in jail...beyond dumb. As dumb as Tre saying Mel should control Joey. 

Edited by thesupremediva1
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The day after my father’s funeral I broke my ankle.  My mother had had a stroke and I told my brother that I didn’t know how I was going to go to work and visit my mother every evening after work, as I had been doing every evening for six years, with a broken ankle.  It was February in DC, which is generally a nasty month.  My brother says no problem, he’ll help more.  Next day I get a voice mail that he’s leaving on vacation to St. Bart’s and will be unreachable for a week.  So, my opinion of Joe is a bit tainted, but, IMO, he’s full of shit.  However, I do think Teresa should be going to him, not Melissa.  That said, I also believe that Melissa probably has plenty of influence as to whether Joe visits the old man or not.

  • Love 18
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Teresa and her dad are such fucking jerks. They are just showing their true colours that they hate Melissa. Why is it all on her to make Joe see his dad. I’m sure he sees him plenty and sorry maybe the grandpa should not be such a fucking asshole. Constantly ragging on your son when you see him about not seeing him or about how you don’t like his wife is not going to help anything. 

If Joe isn’t seeing his dad enough then fucking talk to Joe about it. And huge laughs at Teresa saying she can control her husband. What a dumbass. You mean the husband you committed fraud with?  Or the husband who was pretty much cheating on you on camera? Lol idiots.

Jennifer sucks. Just like Margaret said one uppers are the worst lol.

I thought Melissa’s convo with Teresa at the end was good but of course Teresa has to be a bitch about it in her talking head. I really did not like Teresa this episode ugh.

Edited by Marley
  • Love 23
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As soon as Teresa said that Melissa and Joe went off to the Bahamas on the first anniversary of their mom's death, I was like, "oh, because they didn't want to exploit a death for TV, so they skipped the country."  When they were sitting on the deck later in the episode, Marge pretty much confirmed my suspicion without breaking the fourth wall.

One of the things I think Melissa was trying to convey to Teresa in that last scene--and I admire Melissa's honesty, and Teresa's willingness not to interrupt--is that they are not Italian.  They are Italian-American.  If Teresa's parents are Italian, that is fine.  But Melissa is saying she doesn't feel beholden to Italian traditions. Teresa won't accept that, so she won't accept Melissa.  (Teresa is also very selective with her "Italian" traditions, but that's another story.  Fake breasts make Melissa look like a stripper, but Teresa's are ok because she got them after she was married?  Well, in that case...).  It is one of my pet peeves when people do things just out of tradition, when it means nothing to them.  Anything my husband and I do is because it means something to us.  Sometimes that means following a tradition, and sometimes that means paying it no mind.  Melissa has that same space with her family.  Teresa has that same space with her family.

 

I really think that when Teresa mentions "my family," she thinks that the whole set of people--the Gorgas and the Giudicess--are her family, as in, she's in charge of them.  I don't know if it's because Teresa's parents glorified her, or because she looks at herself as the matriarch because she's older, but again, that's not going to play out her way.  I can't believe how out of line she was at the breakfast table in Oklahoma.  Melissa specifically asked to have the dicusssion at a different place and time, and Teresa kept going, which was so uncalled for.  Then Dolores butting in right after Melissa kindly tells her to mind her own business?  Not cool.  I agree with Jackie---Melissa was a lot calmer than.a lot of people would be.

 

Teresa can't force Joe to want to spend time with his father.  That is a losing battle.  If she wants him to pitch in with the caregiving, that's another story, but it's not something you're going to nag someone into either.  And Melissa can't control her husband.  Why would she want to either?  I said last week that they should look into assisted living, but that they are probably too broke.  Then Teresa mentioned that she was wearing $1,000 boots.  My sympathy went out the window at that point.  If her brother isn't going to pitch in, Teresa can just leave it alone, see him and his wife on holidays, nod and smile, and hire someone to come around and spend time with their dad instead of wearing $1,000 boots.  Also, if Melissa and Joe can afford to go to the Bahamas on the off season (as in, it's not comped by Bravo), then they can kick in some for elder care as well.  Asking Joe to cough up some money is a lot more of a reasonable request than demanding that Joe spend time with his father when he clearly doesn't want to, for whatever reason.  

 

I don't know where Teresa thinks she is getting by yelling across a table that Melissa should take note that Joe spends time with his father when Melissa isn't around.  Does Teresa think Melisss is going to think about that statement reasonably, nod, and then make plans to move into an apartment with her children and her maybe-half-sister, so that Papa Gorga can live out his life the way that Teresa intended? A few seasons ago Melissa straight-up asked Teresa, "Do you want your brother to get a divorce?"  I really think now, with Teresa caring for their parent, and Joe Giudice getting deported, Teresa would be happy if Melissa just moved out of the picture and Joe Gorga moved into the mausoleum with her and her kids.  What a sick bitch.

 

Now that I just defended the Gorgas and I feel gross, I will say it annoyed me to great lengths that disgusting Joe, with his old-fashioned ideas and not a brain cell working behind his eyes, got his own scene and talking heads.  That was super weird.  I hate when they film just a husband, or some of the husbands.  It's a show about women and wives.  I can't even imagine what would motivate Joe to want to film his own scenes.  He does himself NO favors.  Also, my entire life growing up, my dad worked really long hours--also in construction--though I'm not sure he worked 15 hour days.  And I couldn't prcture my dad sitting around with my mom in their bedroom, bitching to my mom about my aunt while she packed.  It just would never happen.  People who work 15 hour days don't have time to bitch.  They literally don't even have time to sleep.  He is so full of shit.  

 

Was I alone in thinking Nu Jackie won the episode?  I guess it's a pretty common experience for us women to get so caught up in a diet that we are weighing and measuring everything that goes in our mouths, so I related to what she said about bringing her own food to the restaurant in her twenties.  It's not exactly an eating disorder, but it feels like something unhealthy is controlling life.  I wanted to see more wedding pics.  I think she still has a bit of a hollow look to her, though with muscle, and I'm glad she's healthy for her kids.  I'm glad for the episode that she spoke her mind, and didn't seem to be putting on airs for the cameras.  She seems legit.  

Edited by LibertarianSlut
Husband doen't equal brother. Too much Teresa in my brain
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Teresa is like a dog with a bone when it comes to Joe spending time with their father. She's not going to successfully nag him to do it. If anything, it's going to piss him off and he's going to stay away. You say it once and then let it alone. Joe will regret it later when his father dies and he realizes he didn't spend the time.

Delores is always, always up someone else's ass, trying to fight their battles. Last season it was Siggy and now it's Teresa. She brings nothing to the table, can't stand her.

I did think it was a rather petty thing for Melissa to say that Teresa has time to spend with her dad because she didn't have Juicy around to cater to. First of all, Teresa is a single parent with a sickly father and having a husband in prison ...doesn't mean that she has more time. WTF? That was so weird. I have no idea what point Melissa was trying to make. Even when Juicy wasn't in prison, Teresa spent a lot of time with her parents.

Margaret doesn't bother me but those pigtails do. Yawn.

New lady swung for the fences with her anorexia tale. This is episode 3 of her first season, wow. Then again, she's a mommy blogger and is used to oversharing and needing attention.

Can't stand the Turkish lady. All of those labeled designer bags -- so tacky, so new money.

  • Love 4
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I have a feeling Joey has always been busy with his job and family and has had less time to spend with his parents. However, the parents have always spent a ton of time with Teresa and as a result her father became close with Joe Guidice - and I think liked him a lot. This made Joey jealous, as he's the only son, and this was the root of a lot of the hostility between them in the early seasons.

I don't agree with Teresa's method but I did understand what she was trying to say. She wanted Melissa to join her in explaining and and maybe assisting Joey in making more time with the dad. Understandable.

I also thought Delores was a good friend in this episode. I wondered about her last season.

  • Love 4
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Just exactly "who" , and when, taught Joey that a woman only choices are to stay home and be a housewife or get "job" ? It was a condescending ass-move to say "sit in a boutique all day" to Antonia - an impressionable 13 year old.  He is talking about the girls momma.

In all of the "hard work he does all day" - he's never run into a woman working a career, who loves her husband and children ? I wish I could be a fly on the wall  the day he runs into a woman, whose help/services he needs for his "business" -  loan officer, lawyer, construction contractor, someone at the permit / license office, etc. 

{silently humming - "who runs the world, girls" }

  • Love 11
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5 hours ago, Bronzedog said:

The state of Oklahoma should sue Bravo.  First Vicki on RHOC trashed the state a few seasons ago (What do people even eat there?) and now the state has to put up with this mess.

Yah, good thought in theory, but have you ever been to OK?  Not you you.  This is not directed at you @Bronzedog. We were up there last year for a dirt bike race for my son and well... we got so confused by their liquor sale regulations we just gave up.  I have nothing else to base my opinion of Oklahoma on other than they will sell you warm booze and will not sell you ice in the same location.   I’m guessing they are happy to get some attention because well, the dust bowl.  

Edited by geauxaway
  • Love 4
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It looks like getting-Joey-to-spend-more-time-with-Daddy is Teresa’s storyline - that, and the stupid bikini competition. Teresa was just fine hogging their parents’ attention all the years before their mom died and her husband went to jail - so fuck Tre.

Edited by nexxie
  • Love 13
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The word Teresa should've used was encourage. It appears Joe often chooses to see his Dad only when Melissa has other plans or is out of town.  Melissa could encourage Joe to spend more time with him regularly.  The problem is Joe, he loves pitting them against each other.  He was practically gleeful telling Melissa what he wanted her to say to Teresa.  Hello, she is your sister, you talk to her.  

Still don't quite understand the point of the trip to Oklahoma about I've really warmed to Margaret & Delores is way more tolerable without Siggy. Jury's still out on the new additions.   

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11 hours ago, mwell345 said:

The Turkish girl is a piece of work.  “Chanel - I’m sure you shop there” and her house has the best sunsets....last week I sort of felt bad for her because her husband seemed like such a jerk.  Now I think it’s a perfect match.

 How long did they stay in OK, and just where did she think they'd be going that she would need all of those Chanel handbags?

 

She may provide comic relief with her high maintenance and one-upping, or she may prove to be insufferable. Time will tell.

  • Love 7
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8 hours ago, LibertarianSlut said:

As soon as Teresa said that Melissa and Joe went off to the Bahamas on the first anniversary of their mom's death, I was like, "oh, because they didn't want to exploit a death for TV, so they skipped the country."

Teresa being so upset about that confused me. Is the anniversary of her mother's death supposed to forever be a day of mourning? Is this a thing? Both of my parents are still alive, but I don't remember keeping death anniversary dates of my grandparents or aunts and uncles that have passed as solemn occasions.

People deal with grief differently; Maybe they didn't want to dwell on the sadness, and the vacation helped them take their mind off of it. 

  • Love 5
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10 hours ago, thesupremediva1 said:

Melissa: false martyr and camera whore.

Miss me with her BS, please.

She is a disrespectful c-word and her husband is a lazy little shit who can't be bothered to fight his own battles, let alone spend time with his grieving dad. I wouldn't mind so much, but they both lie and expect everyone to pretend that their warped version of reality is true and they are good. I really despise them both. 

That trip was so tasteless. Of course they told no one. That's what you do when you have a guilty conscience. I'm sure Mel didn't care but Joey? Helen Keller could read that one from a mile away. 

Juicy, is that you?!

  • Love 12
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11 hours ago, Gigi43 said:

"I want my daughter to stay with her kids and love her husband "You want to sit in a boutique." Fuck off, Joe. Seriously. Nice to put down Melissa in front of all the kids. No wonder Gino is casually calling her "Melissa." Btw, didn't Mrs Gorga work? That's never added up to me with Joe's views. But I don't think math is Joe's strong point.

In addition to him being a neanderthal, there could be something else going on there.  

Last season (I think) he made a point of putting down Melissa's boutique saying he brought the "cake" and she brought the "crumbs."

I watched a repeat of last weeks episode last night and drunk Melissa was loudly proclaiming to Joe that she brought the "cake" and he brought the "crumbs."

I don't know what Joe Gorga does for a living and I have no idea how successful Melissa's boutique is, but with her Bravo salary (and all the other crap these women get paid to do), it's possible she is out-earning him.

In Joe's cave man like mind, that would be disastrous and I could see him putting her down out of jealousy.

(Not excusing his behavior at all - but I wonder sometimes how solid that marriage is anyway.  In the last two seasons, I've gotten a sense that Melissa isn't as enthralled by him as she used to be)

Edited by mwell345
  • Love 10
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51 minutes ago, SweetieDarling said:

Teresa being so upset about that confused me. Is the anniversary of her mother's death supposed to forever be a day of mourning? Is this a thing? Both of my parents are still alive, but I don't remember keeping death anniversary dates of my grandparents or aunts and uncles that have passed as solemn occasions.

People deal with grief differently; Maybe they didn't want to dwell on the sadness, and the vacation helped them take their mind off of it. 

Let me preface this by saying that I think that Teresa claims a lot of things are "Italian" traditions when she really just wants to control her family. (My mother is 100% Italian American and most of our family traditions do come from Italian American traditions). In fact, all of these women do - they justify a lot of bs from their husbands, etc., because "that's what Italian families do" but surprise, surprise! There are a number of Italian American women and men who don't use their culture to turn a blind eye to the indiscretions of their husbands, etc.

Anyway, she was right that the death date the year after is a day of mourning, though I tend to associate that more with Catholic traditions than strictly Italian ones. When my father passed away, we did hold an anniversary mass a year later and invited people back to the house, etc.

All of that being said, taking a trip to avoid the pain is perfectly justified. Again, this is a case where she's using an "Italian" tradition to try to control her brother because, yes, even Italian-American women (and men) can and have broken traditions if it makes emotional sense.  

  • Love 10
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I lay this all at Joe Gorga’s feet. He could very easily and simply diffuse this whole situation by clearly communicating with his father, i.e. “I’m super busy the next few weeks at work. I promise to try to keep in touch as best I can, but if you don’t hear from me a few days, it’s only that I’m working. I’ll make it up to you when things slow down.” Instead, he doubles down on his crappy behavior. He’s clearly not communicating with his father or Teresa. They see him as MIA and they feel his absence.  You would think the way Joe and Melissa are carrying on with the fact that the dad is missing Joe and wanting to spend time with him was the worst thing ever (!!) lol. Isn’t that what he’s been selling us he’s wanted all these years? A better relationship with his father? Joe and Melissa going on like a 5 minute phone call  is somehow tearing him away from work and family priorities is ridiculous. It’s rather pitiful, actually, to see Nonno practically begging Joe for attention. 

I also notice both Melissa and Joe contradicting themselves this episode. On the one hand, he’s too busy working to spend time with his father, but then on the other hand, he is spending time with his father. Which is it? 

We’ve seen the father complaining on camera. We’ve seen him complaining to Joe & Melissa directly. Both Teresa and Gia seem annoyed and over it. Just not buying into this being Teresa “filling the dad’s ear.” How does that benefit her in any way when she’s the one stuck hearing the dad grouse all day? Joe was filmed with the kids last night making dinner - why not have the dad over then too? His excuses are lame. 

Joe is the baby in the family - the boy child in a traditional Italian family. His mother and Teresa treated him like the Baby Jesus. He’s still in that pattern as an adult where everything is centric to him and catered around his needs, his wants, his feelings. He does not give an inch. He squarely puts Melissa in the middle - she either wants to be there or has no clue he’s shnookering her into that position. Baby Jesus knows dad and Teresa will blame Melissa & secretly doesn’t mind. This creation of family squabbling gives him the out he’s really looking for. 

  • Love 9
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1 hour ago, nexxie said:

Juicy, is that you?!

Sorry, just a day-one viewer with a decent amount of reasoning skills and zero patience for people who want to claim "family is everything," but really don't give a crap about their relatives unless they can use them to get on a TV show.

  • Love 6
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I don't see the problem with Joe seeing his dad when Melissa is not around or working or whatever she is doing.  What's wrong with that? Other than maybe he should invite him to their house with their family and giving him a chance to see his grandkids once in a while for Sunday dinner, who gives a damn about why/when Joe is seeing his dad? "Oh, it's just because Melissa isn't around". When Tre's dad was on the phone with her he sounded happy that Joe was going to take him out but then Tre has to again say that it's only because Melissa isn't there. So what?? He's seeing his dad, that is what matters! Shut up with that nonsense, Tre. You have a whole lot of other problems to be fretting over. Like whether or not you are going to keep your marriage going while your husband is banned from the USA for the rest of his life once he gets out of prison.  

Edited by bichonblitz
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48 minutes ago, thesupremediva1 said:

Sorry, just a day-one viewer with a decent amount of reasoning skills and zero patience for people who want to claim "family is everything," but really don't give a crap about their relatives unless they can use them to get on a TV show.

All the same words, but drop the last six, and you’ve described Tre and Juicy.

  • Love 7
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1 hour ago, eleanorofaquitaine said:

Let me preface this by saying that I think that Teresa claims a lot of things are "Italian" traditions when she really just wants to control her family. (My mother is 100% Italian American and most of our family traditions do come from Italian American traditions). In fact, all of these women do - they justify a lot of bs from their husbands, etc., because "that's what Italian families do" but surprise, surprise! There are a number of Italian American women and men who don't use their culture to turn a blind eye to the indiscretions of their husbands, etc.

Anyway, she was right that the death date the year after is a day of mourning, though I tend to associate that more with Catholic traditions than strictly Italian ones. When my father passed away, we did hold an anniversary mass a year later and invited people back to the house, etc.

All of that being said, taking a trip to avoid the pain is perfectly justified. Again, this is a case where she's using an "Italian" tradition to try to control her brother because, yes, even Italian-American women (and men) can and have broken traditions if it makes emotional sense.  

My family is Italian American also. They (the Jersey hos) can spare me with using their ethnicity as an excuse for their behavior, along with the idea that everyone thinks people/Italians from Jersey are all in the mob. They are so unaware clueless. You'd think these people don't get out much with the way they talk about other parts of the country, or the people that live there (anyone remember Teresa's Aztecky (T's words) shoes she brought on their trip out west?)

  • Love 7
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1 hour ago, TexasGal said:

Teresa would be the worst.  But Jennifer is giving her a run for the money.

These women, carting their LV’s to fish and shoot.  

I noticed Marge having lots of trouble walking in what looked like platform boots. I really think--and I know this is a weird thought for the New Jersey gals--that you should be able to walk in your shoes. Not hobble--walk!

  • Love 6
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4 hours ago, SweetieDarling said:

Teresa being so upset about that confused me. Is the anniversary of her mother's death supposed to forever be a day of mourning? Is this a thing? Both of my parents are still alive, but I don't remember keeping death anniversary dates of my grandparents or aunts and uncles that have passed as solemn occasions.

People deal with grief differently; Maybe they didn't want to dwell on the sadness, and the vacation helped them take their mind off of it. 

Tre lost me on that outburst. First she is mad at Joey for not spending time with the living (Nonno) and now she is mad at him for not spending time with the departed (Nonna). 

Last week there was a comment about Nonno might need to see a grief counselor. Now, I think Tre needs to see one. 

First -Tre wanted to have a gathering, or if one was mandated (requested) by their customs, church, or officiant,  she should have said something long before the actual date. If it was for the latter reason, Joey would have known b/c "he was taught " on what is expected for the deceased. 

Second - putting the late Nonna aside - I wonder if Tre could be a little jealous, as a member of the lonely hearts (and horny) club, that Joey and Melissa can just jet set off to the Bahamas on a romantic weekend.

Third - Tre needs to logically understand not everyone grieves or internally processes a death the same way. Maybes it is Joey's (and Melissa) way to deal - get out of NJ.  One concern is Tre how many death anniversaries, does she want to keep going ? All of this death remembrance/celebrations isn't good for the grandchildren either - find a happier, and age appropriate way to let the grands know about Nonna. Many holidays are dated close to the birth-date, not the death-date - with I guess Easter being the exception.

Edited by sATL
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