19 Things I Hate About You: How the Duggars Infuriate

[glow]

There's a bible verse about leaving and cleaving ... I don't see that happening much.

 

The parents, be it Michelle and Jim Bob or the Bates, just see their own family expanded as the kids get married -- more storylines for the press, for tv shows, etc. I even saw a comment on the Bates' blog about some woman's dismay over children taking the cleaving thing too seriously. Jim Bob used to say that once the kids were married, the purse strings were cut, but I don't see that happening, not with the mansion they just gave Jill (he once wanted to give a house to Josh and Anna that they were cleaning up before the wedding -- I don't know what fell through with that), and I don't see any other strings being cut either. In 10 years, if they're on that long, the intro segment will be tedious:

 

I'm Michelle. There's Jim Bob, my wonderful husband. And our children: That's Josh. He married Anna. They have 10 kids, Mac, Michael, Marcus, [names included]. Then there's Jana and her husband with their 5 kids [names included]. John David and his wife with their 6 kids ... etc. The Bates are slightly worse in this regard because even courting couples get included in official family portrait. At least this season didn't have "Here's Jill with Derick. They've been courting for 3 months".  

 

Unless they figure out a way to move 8 hours away, and unless they want to stand on their own two feet and not rely on the Duggar fame to bring in money for every new milestone (let's see if we can call our contact at People and get you a cover for your first baby!), they're essentially always going to be under Jim Bob and Michelle (and TLC), even if they move out from under their roof.

 

eta -- I was just repeating myself, talking about Jill's mansion.

Edited October 15, 2014 by glow

[floridamom]

Right on, glow you are correct! I saw that too. Yes,, they do NOT see their married children as separate adults in their own right. What bothered me a lot was when Josh and Anna were first married and Anna already had McKynzie, she, Josh and Mac were still lumped in "with the kids". They went over when mama and daddy called, participated in stupid games like they were juveniles. For heavens sake, Anna had a household of her own, a daughter and Josh,, well, he worked at the car lot and ate his meals with Anna at their house, grandma Duggar's or not, it was their separate residence. They also traveled and sat with the rest of the kids on that stinky bus or in other continents as well. Honestly, Anna looked ridiculous at that time. I hope she can assert herself as one of the ADULTS in that family now. Derick has to have balls of steel with Jill's family AND with Jill to make sure he is NOT treated as a juvenile. During that stupid stock car race, Ben (although only 19 himself) seemed rather out of place with a bunch of little kids and he was being treated like their slightly older brother, ie 15 year old brother at that....

[BitterApple]

floridamom, I think that's why the DC move was so good for Josh and Anna. Yes, they're still very much attached to the dog and pony show, but both of them have matured by leaps and bounds now that they've gotten some distance from the insane asylum.  I think Anna's "helpless housewife" act is strictly for filming purposes and that girl is getting around town way more than Boob and Michelle would like to believe. 

[GEML]

They are shown in both MD and VA in almost equal portions. Believe me, that's mature. Most of us refuse to cross the Potomac river! ;)

[NikSac]

I don't even know where to post this so I hope it's the right place. A bunch of my 'friends' (the ones I kind of know but not that well) have been posting on Facebook tonight about what amazing, calm, peaceful parents the Duggars are. It's kind of freaking me out.

[Darknight]

Wow that is so well phrased. Flamboyant modesty. My "oh so modest" grandma would have been pretty proud of this phrase and title. It's always funny to me when people have to advertise "look, look, this covers my neck AND my kneecaps! so I won't offend anyone!" Okay....

Bullshit. They're not modest at all. First modesty refers to behavior not clothing. The Duggars love drawing attention to themselves. I hate how they judge others that font follow them. Like when Michelle went to nyc to pick out a wedding dress for her 25th anniversary and brought the whole damn family including Josh and anna. Which was ridiculous. They were judging other brides who were trying on gowns with no sleeves and the back out. What a bunch of hypocrites

[Dr.Scully]

Every time I read this thread's title, I think "everything." And that's probably going to be the case unless or until one of the kids leaves home and publicly turns on Jim Boob and MEchelle and their whole act.

 

You took the words right out of my mouth! I literally think "everything" every time I read this thread's title, too!

[floridamom]

Ditto for me, too, I think "everything" also. I'll clarify them even more, IMO, they are "showboats of flamboyant modesty".; everywhere they go and in everything they do oh, and don't do too!

Darknight: that was sarcasm... it's an oxymoron to be flamboyantly modest....we all know that are NOT modest. (Just to clarify)

[jodo]

Do they ever sit down together for a meal at that big table and eat like a family or is is all buffet style off paper plates and only the little ones sit at the table?

 

Also do the kids just get up when they feel like it as it always seems in every episode there are a couple of little ones eating alone?

[Higgins]

They are shown in both MD and VA in almost equal portions. Believe me, that's mature. Most of us refuse to cross the Potomac river! ;)

I avoid the Cabin John Bridge like the plague

[glowlights]

I don't even know where to post this so I hope it's the right place. A bunch of my 'friends' (the ones I kind of know but not that well) have been posting on Facebook tonight about what amazing, calm, peaceful parents the Duggars are. It's kind of freaking me out.

 

Wow. Were they all waking up from anesthesia?

 

ITA about the flamboyant modesty. I think it goes along with the bible verse about praying in a closet: And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Hey Jim Bob, put THAT in your hairspray and sniff it!

[NikSac]

Wow. Were they all waking up from anesthesia?

 

ITA about the flamboyant modesty. I think it goes along with the bible verse about praying in a closet: And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites. For they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by others. Hey Jim Bob, put THAT in your hairspray and sniff it!

 

I have no idea on the anesthesia but I was starting to wonder! I get that some people really like this family but do they not see how messed up they are at least some of the time? The first time I saw a side hug between JB and one of his daughters was enough to make me think something was seriously wrong.

 

I think flamboyant modesty is an awesome description. Love it. I'm trying to figure out how to work it into a conversation just to see the reaction.

[NausetGirl]

I call bs on this. No sane adult in the world is going to sit and listen to two teenagers talk for four hours.

 

With any other family, you'd be absolutely right.  But the operative word here is SANE.

Edited October 17, 2014 by NausetGirl

[truthtalk2014]

Watched the episode where they were answering questions- and at the end- the crazy psycho MEchelle seemed so HAPPY and almost POSSESSED when they announced that she was once again PREGGERS!  Please!

 

I hated the point when she asked Jordyn if she was excited or happy- sorry can't remember the exact question.

 

OH YEA- Jordyn is so excited to have yet another little Miracle that takes time away from her. (not that she ever got any).

[CarolMK]

One thing I've heard quite a bit from MIchelle in watching reruns of previous seasons...how they're "praying" about adoption. The hell they are. Their leader Bill Gothard was always against adoption anyway and has not changed his position. If I were Jana, Joy Anna and Jinger, and Michelle was serious about adopting a baby how, I'd band together and run away in the middle of the night. 

[ginger90]

One thing I've heard quite a bit from MIchelle in watching reruns of previous seasons...how they're "praying" about adoption. The hell they are. Their leader Bill Gothard was always against adoption anyway and has not changed his position. If I were Jana, Joy Anna and Jinger, and Michelle was serious about adopting a baby how, I'd band together and run away in the middle of the night. 

She may be praying about adoption, but in what context? Dear Lord help me to come up with the reason not to? Who knows. This family says they pray about many things. Jill prayed  for a tall man and she said she prayed about her wedding dress for crying out loud.

[Barb23]

I was watching one of the older episodes today & there was a TH of the speaker of the kids (Jill) & producer was asking her about either their view on dancing or the modest dressing. Of course Jill must have just taken a gulp of the Kool-aid & we got the usual word for word reply "stirs up desires that can't be righteously fulfilled." I wanted the producer (or whoever asks the questions) to keep asking "what do you mean by that?" Jill was probably about 18 at the time - what teenager or young adult, that isn't a Duggar, would say that? The kids are just robots spewing the line.

Boob really needs some counseling about being a sex pervert. Saw the episode where they announce Mullet is pregnant (oops I mean expecting) with #20 - Jubilee. Yes, Mullet was happy but he was over the roof, grinning ear to ear, like he was telling the world that he IS still the man & able to knock up his wife, again. He reminds me of Aviva Dreschers father, George, on Housewives of New York. That man is so disgusting about his sexual addiction/ perverted actions. Him & Boob would make a great pair. Just Yuck!!

[glow]

This is more a TLC thing, but I saw ads a few weeks about telling me that they were the largest family in America. I guess the Bates ceased to exist for TLC.

Edited October 17, 2014 by glow

[NausetGirl]

Ghoulina- I could have written this because I too googled them & found Duggars without pity & TWoP and all the comments about them. Boy I have learned a lot in a little over a year.

 

Same for me.  And I'd be willing to bet this is the case for many of us here.  But the fans - well...  There are none so blind as those who will not see.

[BradandJanet]

I remember years ago going to a party at the home of a member of an evangelical cult. A close relative belonged to this group. Sigh. Anyway, they played softball in the backyard. Every member had to fall on his knees before almost every hit or swing to pray for God's favor. You think baseball is a slow game? Try the extreme Christian version of it. Anyway, I remember thinking what attention whores these people were. Of course, some pitches went over the plate, and some didn't. Sometimes there was a base hit, but mostly there wasn't. The outcome of the game was ordinary, but the members got the opportunity to call attention to their holiness. I think about this incident every time I see the Duggars and their public displays of righteousness. 

[NikSac]

She may be praying about adoption, but in what context? Dear Lord help me to come up with the reason not to? Who knows. This family says they pray about many things. Jill prayed  for a tall man and she said she prayed about her wedding dress for crying out loud.

 

Did she pray about flip flops for her wedding?

[merylinkid]

Isn't this the gang who wen to visit some church and made one of the "gender" reveals?   If I were a regular member of that church, I would have been pissed that these strangers were invading my religious service, then taking it over so they could fame strumpet about something so ordinary.   Ooooh look we know the sex of our baby.   Yes, welcome to the miracle of medicine.   Oops, can't say that.    Believe me the whole congretation would have some truly righteous indignation from me.

[leighroda]

I always think I've said all I need to say on this thread... And then I catch a rerun in th 1-3 pm hours on tv when I can't find anything else to watch and I find another annoyance.

Today they showed an episode where Josh was talking about owning the car lot meant that he got to stay home in the morning with his family (you can read that as slept till 11 and got to the car lot at 12) and they showed a man who was looking at a car but saying he couldn't afford the down payment... How many times have we seen Jim Bob haggle and low ball offer prices to fit him boasting about he doesn't pay sticker price for anything... Yet Josh didn't even seem to give a single iota about maybe making a deal or helping this man out. I don't know the mans situation... Maybe he had no business car shopping... Who knows but josh could have at least pretended to care a tiny bit.

[floridamom]

Yep! I saw the question and answer rerun also. When Jill was asked about dancing I caught her response..and YES, she parroted the righteously fulfilling prepared statement, but when asked what does that mean, she said "I don't know" in a melodic giggly tone...those kids couldn't explain their way out a paper bag. They really don't have a thought of their own nor do they really know WHY they live the way they do other than "not going to hell". Jill must have been 20,21 in that interview. So sad that they are "encouraged" not to have an original thought or question in their minds about anything...

The Duggars also answered the "soft" questions like how many cans of green beans doe it take....? But when JB was asked about getting angry with the kids, he didn't answer the question, he continued with some diatribe about how NOT getting angry is important...he sure CAN dance! Michelle responded that she would answer to God for yelling at her kids, but also did not confirm if/when she got angry with her kids...which WAS THE QUESTION in the first place.

[leighroda]

I love ish the pop up provided actual important information... Not just and randome item/usage multiplied by 19.

[Betweenyouandme]

Yep! I saw the question and answer rerun also. When Jill was asked about dancing I caught her response..and YES, she parroted the righteously fulfilling prepared statement, but when asked what does that mean, she said "I don't know" in a melodic giggly tone...those kids couldn't explain their way out a paper bag. They really don't have a thought of their own nor do they really know WHY they live the way they do other than "not going to hell". Jill must have been 20,21 in that interview. So sad that they are "encouraged" not to have an original thought or question in their minds about anything...

The Duggars also answered the "soft" questions like how many cans of green beans doe it take....? But when JB was asked about getting angry with the kids, he didn't answer the question, he continued with some diatribe about how NOT getting angry is important...he sure CAN dance! Michelle responded that she would answer to God for yelling at her kids, but also did not confirm if/when she got angry with her kids...which WAS THE QUESTION in the first place.

Yep to all this. And, I didn't like when asked "what would you do if one of yours kids accidentally kissed a member of the opposite sex?"

Michelle: "well, if it was on accident...now, if it was on purpose...but, our kids don't want to do that until they're married. At least that's what they told me" ..paraphrased

Anyway, what? That was a terrible answer. The question meant how would you punish them or what would you actually say?

[jmt111]

Did she pray about flip flops for her wedding?

They act as if praying is a visit to Santa Clause.

[PityFree]

Apparently the girls all share clothes out of one big closet. Boys, too, I assume. But for the love of all that is holy I hope they own their own underwear. I doubt it though, so I will over here dry heaving.  

Michelle: "well, if it was on accident...now, if it was on purpose...but, our kids don't want to do that until they're married. At least that's what they told me" ..paraphrased

Of course the kids want to save kissing for marriage! All those years of MEchelle asking toddlers if they want to kiss anyone before marriage and then smacking them with a slotted spoon until they said no must have worked. 

[Guest]

Right on, glow you are correct! I saw that too. Yes,, they do NOT see their married children as separate adults in their own right. What bothered me a lot was when Josh and Anna were first married and Anna already had McKynzie, she, Josh and Mac were still lumped in "with the kids". They went over when mama and daddy called, participated in stupid games like they were juveniles. For heavens sake, Anna had a household of her own, a daughter and Josh,, well, he worked at the car lot and ate his meals with Anna at their house, grandma Duggar's or not, it was their separate residence. They also traveled and sat with the rest of the kids on that stinky bus or in other continents as well. Honestly, Anna looked ridiculous at that time. I hope she can assert herself as one of the ADULTS in that family now. Derick has to have balls of steel with Jill's family AND with Jill to make sure he is NOT treated as a juvenile. During that stupid stock car race, Ben (although only 19 himself) seemed rather out of place with a bunch of little kids and he was being treated like their slightly older brother, ie 15 year old brother at that....

I do wonder how much of this type of stuff is for filming. If they're filming the show at the time and the older (married) kids are getting a portion of the revenue (as I believe all of the over 18 crowd should for appearing on the show), I think it makes sense.

 

I do wonder how much is "real" and how much is for the cameras.  

[glowlights]

Yep to all this. And, I didn't like when asked "what would you do if one of yours kids accidentally kissed a member of the opposite sex?"

Michelle: "well, if it was on accident...now, if it was on purpose...but, our kids don't want to do that until they're married. At least that's what they told me" ..paraphrased

Anyway, what? That was a terrible answer. The question meant how would you punish them or what would you actually say?

 

In MEchelle's defense, there is absolutely no way these imprisoned kids could ever be in a situation where they'd have a snowball's chance in hell of accidentally kissing a member of the opposite sex. The interviewer might as well asked her what she would do if one of her kids grew wings and flew to Mars... :(

[mimionthebeach]

Imagine. Jill is fixin to give little Jenny a kiss on the top of her head because the sweet child brought her a flower. Boys are rough-housing nearby. Suddenly John David tosses someone across the floor knocking Jenny over and resulting in Jill placing a wet one on Lawson Bates. Could happen... *shrug

[WTFFF]

To defend Michelle a tiny bit, the question was incredibly stupid.  But I assume it was phrased in that way so she would duck having to answer what people really want to know is, how would you punish your kids if they didn't follow the limits that you made them set for themselves.

[ghoulina]

Michelle: "well, if it was on accident...now, if it was on purpose...but, our kids don't want to do that until they're married. At least that's what they told me" ..paraphrased

 

At least that's what they told HER? HA! Try the other way around. That's one of the things that irks me most about these people. Can they just own that they're forcing their insane courtship rules on these kids? Instead of pretending that they each just happen to choose not to do anything but hold hands before marriage? Because it's so obvious.

[Mrsjumbo]

At least that's what they told HER? HA! Try the other way around. That's one of the things that irks me most about these people. Can they just own that they're forcing their insane courtship rules on these kids? Instead of pretending that they each just happen to choose not to do anything but hold hands before marriage? Because it's so obvious.

Yes, that's what really annoyed me about Jill's engagement. She & Derick are in the car afterwards holding hands, & she explains that together they discussed with JB & M about what would be appropriate. Really, you are months away from getting married, you are grown ass adults, & you have to run to mommy & daddy to see if it's ok if you hold hands? It baffles the mind.

[WTFFF]

Jill pretty clearly wanted to full-frontal hug and hold hands with Derick before their engagement.  But Michelle shut that down pretty fast.  How does anyone buy the "kids are choosing this" nonsense?

[brooksneenee]

Yep! I saw the question and answer rerun also. When Jill was asked about dancing I caught her response..and YES, she parroted the righteously fulfilling prepared statement, but when asked what does that mean, she said "I don't know" in a melodic giggly tone...those kids couldn't explain their way out a paper bag. They really don't have a thought of their own nor do they really know WHY they live the way they do other than "not going to hell". Jill must have been 20,21 in that interview. So sad that they are "encouraged" not to have an original thought or question in their minds about anything...

The Duggars also answered the "soft" questions like how many cans of green beans doe it take....? But when JB was asked about getting angry with the kids, he didn't answer the question, he continued with some diatribe about how NOT getting angry is important...he sure CAN dance! Michelle responded that she would answer to God for yelling at her kids, but also did not confirm if/when she got angry with her kids...which WAS THE QUESTION in the first place.

[floridamom]

Once again it is utterly ridiculous for the Duggar parents to still be pedaling that nonsense that the "couple" decides their courting rules. That is bull-loney plain and simple. If that were true, Jill and Derick's "airport hug" would have been "ok", and her parents should have said, Well, I guess they changed their courting rules, as it is their call.. but NO, Michelle went on to say "that they won't do THAT again". If anyone doesn't understand what that meant, they have blinders on about this family.

[juneday]

Yes! MeChelle's attitude about the frontal-hug bothered me so much. Like, it's a hug woman! Their grown adults, get over it!

She acted so shocked and disapproving and I don't doubt whenever they got home Jill got a strong "talking-to.", maybe more than that.

Where did they come up the theme of J names, anyway? Is it for Jesus? Lol

[QueBueno]

In MEchelle's defense, there is absolutely no way these imprisoned kids could ever be in a situation where they'd have a snowball's chance in hell of accidentally kissing a member of the opposite sex. The interviewer might as well asked her what she would do if one of her kids grew wings and flew to Mars... :(

In one of the THs with all of the older girls pre-courtin', didn't Jessa admit kissing a boy? I thought I saw that in a recent re-run.

[WTFFF]

 

Where did they come up the theme of J names, anyway? Is it for Jesus? Lol

 

They claim it was coincidence with the first three, then they didn't want anyone to feel "left out" in case they ended up the only kid without a J name.

 

I've always suspected that JimBob always had it in his head that his family might be more attention-grabbing with that theme, since his entire political career seemed based around "look how many times I put my dick in my wife!"

[Barb23]

In one of the THs with all of the older girls pre-courtin', didn't Jessa admit kissing a boy? I thought I saw that in a recent re-run.

I think she admitted to kissing one of her brothers. TLC's way of making sure we stay tuned to the show.

[anstar]

Jessa said she has 10 brothers and she's kissed every one of them.  Snarky answer to a question I'm sure she was tired of being asked. I know a lot of people don't like Jessa, but I do. She's no nonsense, very literal, and sarcastic.  I can relate to her. It's Jill who gets on my nerves.  Too up, and too much in everybody else's business.

[bigskygirl]

Someone is reading forums and threads about the Duggars because I am not buying the story lines of how happy and perfect everyone is doing in Duggar Land.  I cannot wait to see how Jill/Derrick and Jessa/Ben will be portrayed on the show after the weddings are shown. I would not be surprise if Josh and Anna are a little angry over all the attention Jill is getting. They are not the top dogs anymore. Maybe this is why they are trying to show Josh and Anna are doing well away from the rest of the family.

[Ilovemylabs]

Jill pretty clearly wanted to full-frontal hug and hold hands with Derick before their engagement.  But Michelle shut that down pretty fast.  How does anyone buy the "kids are choosing this" nonsense?

They have said on more than one occasion that the couple sets their own limits but I don't believe that for a second.  What if Jill had stated, "Derick and I will hold hands and cuddle while courting and we will kiss once we are engaged", what do you think the reaction might have been?!

[PityFree]

I think Michelle would have gone after them with a leather belt.

[cmr2014]

I think she would simply have made their lives miserable. not just Jill and Derick, either, but everyone.

 

I think she would have hounded Jill to "pray about her disobedient heart" and threatened Derick with breaking off the courtship because God had laid it on her heart that he might not be the right man for Jill.

 

I think all of the other kids would be harangued to pray for Jill and Derick, and there would have been lots of passive-aggressive lectures to the younger kids (within earshot of Jill and Derick) about how terribly concerned she was that Satan had taken control of their hearts, and so on.

[Mrsjumbo]

Remember Mechelle blurting out when Jill & Deeick walked in to make their engagement announcement to the family- "ooh, someone's holding hands!"

(Wouldn't it have been hilarious if Jill & Derick said "yes, this is our announcement. We're not engaged yet but have decided to hold hands.")

As it was, it was kind of a warning to the other kids from Mechelle that hand holding is only to be done after engagement.

Edited October 19, 2014 by Mrsjumbo

[ramble]

I know this has been discussed before but every so often my brain hurts with it. The disgusting need that JB & M seem to have to display their freedom to rut in front of their children & the greater public as well. Do they honestly think that's endearing or shows how real love works? It reminds me of high school kids feeling the need to prove that they're able to have sex by being overt with public affection.

Look see! We've done it. I know how to put part A into slot B & now we're doing it all the time. We gets to have the sex whenever we want & none of y'all can unless you're married & then you're probably doing it wrong or don't do it nearly as good as we do. We do it so good we have eleventy billion children. That's some good sex there don't ya know. Bet you wish you was banging as much as we're banging. Hey look kids, we can have sex & you can't. Sex. Sex sex sex. We love it. Feels good. Aww, but none for you. Wanna watch us simulate sex? We'll show you. Mmmm, sex.

Good grief! I'm a bit surprised the kids even want to have sex themselves after watching their parents dry hump everywhere. I find it nauseating seeing them pretending to practice hide the salami the limited amount I've seen. Show that enough & it's actually pretty effective birth control.

[Darknight]

This is more a TLC thing, but I saw ads a few weeks about telling me that they were the largest family in America. I guess the Bates ceased to exist for TLC.

Umm my husband's grandparents had 24kids. They aren't the largest maybe just the largest fundie family who has a show

I know this has been discussed before but every so often my brain hurts with it. The disgusting need that JB & M seem to have to display their freedom to rut in front of their children & the greater public as well. Do they honestly think that's endearing or shows how real love works? It reminds me of high school kids feeling the need to prove that they're able to have sex by being overt with public affection.

Look see! We've done it. I know how to put part A into slot B & now we're doing it all the time. We gets to have the sex whenever we want & none of y'all can unless you're married & then you're probably doing it wrong or don't do it nearly as good as we do. We do it so good we have eleventy billion children. That's some good sex there don't ya know. Bet you wish you was banging as much as we're banging. Hey look kids, we can have sex & you can't. Sex. Sex sex sex. We love it. Feels good. Aww, but none for you. Wanna watch us simulate sex? We'll show you. Mmmm, sex.

Good grief! I'm a bit surprised the kids even want to have sex themselves after watching their parents dry hump everywhere. I find it nauseating seeing them pretending to practice hide the salami the limited amount I've seen. Show that enough & it's actually pretty effective birth control.

I doubt JB AND MICHELLE have any good sex.I'm surprised that these kids would want to have sex because sex means lots of babies Edited October 19, 2014 by Darknight

[Darknight]

They have said on more than one occasion that the couple sets their own limits but I don't believe that for a second. What if Jill had stated, "Derick and I will hold hands and cuddle while courting and we will kiss once we are engaged", what do you think the reaction might have been?!

I think J'chelle and Jim think holding hands with the opposite sex might accidently get them pregnant or body parts might land inside each other

Edited October 19, 2014 by Darknight